im M 16 and my gf ako na ka-same age ko we've been together for 2 years na and this april is we finally decided to take things further. so nag drop yung gf ko ng mga hints about na may lover na siya or na pupusuan ganun and then hangang sa nag click-in and parang let's just say na bigla kamint na legal both side since mag ka baranggay lang kami but, we never see each other, never kaming nag initiate sa personal so basically parang ldr pero malapit lang kami. our parents know each other kasi eh since mag kaklase yung niyang kapatid at akin so ayun nga, they know each other. and noong naka usap ko yung mommy niya through video call they nag pakilala ako as suitor niya and nag ka-sundo kami na ganun na lang since, we don't have label pa kasi nga yes nag haharutan kami and nag a-act kami as a gf and bf pero we don't have any specific label talaga. so nag stick kami sa ganung label and ayun yung inopen namin sa both parents namin, pero ngayon nakita ng mommy niya yung letter na sinula niya for me and meron doong iloveyou or what so ever na makakapag patunay na mas deep pa yung relationship namin kesa sa "panliligaw" pa lang. take note po ah, sinabi naming manliligaw stage pa lang since i know that we're too young and sa loob ng 2 years na pag uusap namin is never namin crinoss yung line, ngayong 2023 lang namin ginawa. and yung nakita ko yun ng mommy niya mag stop na raw kami, to cut the chase short ganun nga mag stop na raw kami and maging friends muna pero i can't, kase parang torture na yun i mean we already got this far na eh 2 years na pag kakaroon ng feelings for each other tapos suddenly we have to act as a friend? paano na to? kahit kasi siya hindi na alam yung gagawin eh, so please, paano na? i need some grown man's advice if ever man na napunta kayo sa ganitong sitwasyon noon, please. help. thankyou po

At work today we had a cute small/medium dog running around the property, and through the hallways. This is a no pet building. Asked around and no one knows who dog that is running around. Went up to it and it was friendly. Female apparently. Her collar was broken, tied on and dirty. She had a good temperament, coat was nice and clean, no fleas or ticks, teeth were good, ears perfect. So she was loved by someone. She wasn't trained though. Figured she just got out. After an hour of asking and waiting, we had to take her the humane society down the road.
Filled out the paperwork and, she had no microchip after scanning her. off she went then and I left. Got a call 3 hours later, the Humane Society had a few questions. So apparently the dog is named Clover and she belongs to a homeless man. They were working with him for her. We do get a lot of homeless people that come through my work, but none today.
I feel bad for taking her in. If he doesn't pick her up in a certain time frame, then she's going up for adoption. The guy on the phone did say they would find her a good home. On the other hand, she might get a better home and life. Our staff were told to keep an eye out for a homeless man, just incase so we can tell him where clover is.
I'm feeling guilty but, also feel maybe I did the right thing?

I've always wanted to visit Las Vegas and try my luck at the casinos. So when my friend invited me to join him for a weekend trip, I jumped at the chance. He said he had a foolproof system to beat the roulette and promised to share it with me.
We arrived at the hotel and checked in. He told me to meet him at the casino floor in an hour. I decided to take a nap and freshen up before heading down. I set my alarm and fell asleep.
I woke up to a loud knock on the door. It was my friend, looking frantic and disheveled. He grabbed my arm and dragged me out of the room. "We have to go, now!" he shouted.
"What's going on?" I asked, confused and groggy.
"I'll explain later. Just follow me!" he said, as he ran towards the elevator.
We got to the lobby and he hailed a cab. He told the driver to take us to the airport. He looked around nervously, as if expecting someone to chase us.
"Are you going to tell me what happened?" I demanded.
He sighed and said, "Remember that system I told you about? Well, it worked. Too well. I won so much money that the casino manager got suspicious and accused me of cheating. He called security and they tried to detain me. I managed to escape and ran to your room. Luckily, you were still asleep and didn't notice anything."
I was stunned. "How much did you win?" I asked.
He smiled sheepishly and said, "About half a million dollars."
I gasped. "That's amazing! Where is it?"
He pointed to his backpack. "It's all here. In cash."
I couldn't believe it. He had just pulled off the biggest heist of his life and I had slept through it.
He said, "Don't worry, buddy. I'll split it with you. You're my partner in crime, after all."
I smiled and said, "Thanks, man. You're the best friend ever."
We high-fived and laughed.
Then we heard sirens.
We looked out the window and saw police cars surrounding the cab.
The driver said, “Sorry, guys. I had to do it. They offered me a cut.”
He locked the doors and drove off.
We screamed.

My girlfriends birthday is coming up this month and I wanted to make a collage of her best memories and surprise her with it. I decided to use the pictures on her favorites folder on her phone, cause that's where she has pictures of everybody close to her (her family, friends and pet dogs etc). While scrolling I noticed that she had a thirst trap saved of korean model who is very well built and muscular. Now, she is a huge k-pop fan and likes thirst traps of all those artists on instagram and i've never been bothered about it before. But this one caught my eye cause the mentioned picture is very sexual in nature. So I asked her why she has that on her phone and she said it's because it nice to look at and that it is very "aesthetic". I was confused by her answer but i ignored it and moved on. Later that night we were talking about her gallery and I brought it up again. I asked her if she'd be okay if i had a picture of a half naked model saved on my phone to which she said she wouldn't be bothered. This again confused me but we laughed about this whole thing and moved on. Later she tells me she's telling me that she's deleting pictures of BTS members on her phone because she didn't want it to be a problem in the future. I told her that i never asked her to delete, nor was i uncomfortable by said pictures, and i asked her to please not delete pictures of her favorite band members because she thinks i'll pick a fight. She wasn't willing to listen to me and then this conversation turned into a huge argument where she ended up calling me emotional and insecure because i made such a big fuss out of a single picture on her phone and does not want to talk to me for a few days. I really do not understand. I had asked her why she had the picture , yes. But i didn't turn it into an argument. I just did not want her to delete pictures thinking i'll pick a fight. Am I in the wrong here? I am genuinely confused.

I've always wanted to visit Las Vegas and try my luck at the casinos. So when my friend invited me to join him for a weekend trip, I jumped at the chance. He said he had a foolproof system to beat the roulette and promised to share it with me.
We arrived at the hotel and checked in. He told me to meet him at the casino floor in an hour. I decided to take a nap and freshen up before heading down. I set my alarm and fell asleep.
I woke up to a loud knock on the door. It was my friend, looking frantic and disheveled. He grabbed my arm and dragged me out of the room. "We have to go, now!" he shouted.
"What's going on?" I asked, confused and groggy.
"I'll explain later. Just follow me!" he said, as he ran towards the elevator.
We got to the lobby and he hailed a cab. He told the driver to take us to the airport. He looked around nervously, as if expecting someone to chase us.
"Are you going to tell me what happened?" I demanded.
He sighed and said, "Remember that system I told you about? Well, it worked. Too well. I won so much money that the casino manager got suspicious and accused me of cheating. He called security and they tried to detain me. I managed to escape and ran to your room. Luckily, you were still asleep and didn't notice anything."
I was stunned. "How much did you win?" I asked.
He smiled sheepishly and said, "About half a million dollars."
I gasped. "That's amazing! Where is it?"
He pointed to his backpack. "It's all here. In cash."
I couldn't believe it. He had just pulled off the biggest heist of his life and I had slept through it.
He said, "Don't worry, buddy. I'll split it with you. You're my partner in crime, after all."
I smiled and said, "Thanks, man. You're the best friend ever."
We high-fived and laughed.
Then we heard sirens.
We looked out the window and saw police cars surrounding the cab.
The driver said, “Sorry, guys. I had to do it. They offered me a cut.”
He locked the doors and drove off.
We screamed.

Hi! I'm Dylan (they/them). I turned 24 a few months ago and am primarily looking to meet new friends and something that could develop into a long-term relationship. I currently live in Georgia, but am actively looking to move out of the south. I'm demi, like taking things slow, and am primarily aesthetically attracted to femininity or androgyny regardless of gender.
A little bit more about me:

• Physically, I'm 6'1", shaved head, pale skin, blue eyes, and a fairly slim build (albeit I gained and am currently losing some fall/winter weight). Presentation-wise I'd say I'm more "soft-masculine" I guess? My fashion is minimalist with lots of natural colors but I like to throw in more feminine accessories/earrings or painting my nails. I've tried more feminine fashion and I like it, but not all the time and not enough to wear regularly. I love colder weather since I get to wear all my favorite sweaters and scarves! I used to be a gym rat in college and I'm getting back to my old gym habits, which is really exciting.
• I'm looking into developing a more androgynous style since I think that'd be cool as fuck.
• I work as software engineer and I love programming and messing with computers. From the moment I was exposed to programming I knew I wanted to do it for the rest of my life. I use Arch btw.
• I love cats and sharing pictures of my sweet furry friend.
• I've been described by others as sensitive, empathetic, and thoughtful. I'm pretty introverted and shy in group situations but love having thoughtful conversations and learning about people and what they are passionate about and why. I'm very affectionate and cuddly towards people I'm close to, while being cognizant of their boundaries of course.
• My greatest passion is competitive fighting games, mainly the Guilty Gear series. Playing and studying the game, going to tournaments both local and afar, and interacting with the community bring me immense joy. Starting in late 2022 I've been traveling and taking weekend trips to bigger tournaments, and I'm always training for the next event!
• I deeply love music and play a few instruments, but I've mainly been focusing on classical guitar. Neutral Milk Hotel is my favorite band of all time, but I'm constantly exploring lots of music across pretty much every genre. I have soft spots for jazz, folk, prog/math rock, some alt rock, and psych rock though. In the classical world I tend to be drawn to the Romantic period composers. I also collect vinyl!
• Running, longboarding, or skateboarding through local parks is one of my favorite ways to spend time outdoors. I also enjoy hiking, but never really go unless it's with others.
• Huge coffee nerd and night owl. Those are probably related. Figuring out people's coffee tastes and brewing them a cup they love is really fulfilling.
• I'm vegan for the animals and I'll gladly cook badass vegan meals for people.
• I read a little bit every day. Right now I'm reading Thinking, Fast and Slow and the Dune series (really excited for the new movie!). My favorite novel is definitely The Catcher in the Rye, and I'm also a massive Tolkien nerd and read lots of philosophy and psychology, although I'm definitely a novice in the latter two fields. I'm attempting to learn Japanese as of a few days ago, too!
• Some of the non-fighting games I'm playing right now include Tears of the Kingdom, Dwarf Fortress, and Pokemon. My favorite singleplayer game is Morrowind!
• I hate cars and one of my big goals is to move out of the south and to a city where I can be car-independent.
• My favorite movie is The Big Lebowski and watching it never fails to make me smile. My favorite anime is a toss-up between Cowboy Bebop and Ping Pong the Animation. Naruto gets on the honorable mention list for how many times it's made me cry.

What I'm looking for in a romantic partner:

• Someone in roughly my age range (20-30-ish) who is passionate and caring and enjoys absurdist/dry/goofy humor interspersed with deep conversations. I tend towards identifying as sapiosexual.
• Someone who is also affectionate!
• Someone okay with monogamy. Polyamory is really cool, but not for me personally. I'm kink-friendly and a sub-leaning switch. Don't really like discussing sexual tastes in public forums otherwise.
• Someone who would be fine with long-distance if circumstances dictate that.
• Someone who is a child-free leftist.
• Someone who is alright with me being an introvert who can get overstimulated easily.
• Tobacco use is a deal-breaker for me in romantic contexts. I don't drink alcohol for physical health reasons but I have nothing against alcohol use in non-addiction contexts.

If you're interested in reaching out then I'd love to hear more about you in a message or chat!

First, I don't know what drove the big price bump this year - inflation, venue costs, whatever - so this isn't necessarily a criticism of the price bump. Second, this is purely anecdotal - I am not trying to make any sweeping generalizations about this is the doom of DefCon or anything like that. I am just interested if anyone else is seeing the same thing.
To the meat of the matter now, so we are like 9 weeks out and I am starting to try and track down which of my friends are going to be attending this year and arranging get togethers and such. In the process I have had a few friends (like 4 at this point) who have been fairly regular attendees tell me they aren't going this year, citing cost as a major reason. Ancillary reasons have included they don't like the new venue, aren't happy with some of the village changes, and skytalks cancellation, but those have all been partnered with cost. (Also one was really unhappy with room block costs, they apparently compared costs the week after and thought the hotels were gouging, but that seems to really be outside DefCon control (I personally have not compared costs)).
I am still planning on going, and a good portion of my friends are also still planning on going despite these defections but I am curious if anyone else has encountered this.

This was a crazy time that I’m almost positive I’ll never forget. Me and my cousins (Jay, Jerret, and Anthony) were celebrating Jarret’s birthday at a hotel. My nieces birthday was also around the same day so they did two birthdays in one hotel. Me and my cousins which were all boys stayed in one room and my niece and her friends stayed in another room. The rooms were very separated and were basically from one end of the hall to the other. Everything was going good for the first 2 hours until stuff started getting a little weird. We got a phone call from in our room and you could obviously tell it was my niece and her friends because they have similar voices and it’s easy to tell if it’s them or not. They would also ding dong ditch our door but you could still tell it was then because they would loudly run away and laugh. But things started getting different to where when they would knock on the door they wouldn’t one away laughing. It was very silent, they used to bang on the door when they would ding dong ditch but the knocks started getting quieter and their was only 2-3 knocks instead of 500. It started creeping all of us out and Jay look through the peep hole but no one was there. When we heard the quiet knocks again u could also see the shadow of feet at the bottom crack of the door. While the shadow was there Jay sprung up and looked through the peep hole. But still he saw no one. Then Jay told us a thought that creeped all of us out. He wondered if the person that was still outside the door was ducking or it was a ghost. It creeped all of us out and we tried to ignore it. We also called my niece to see if it was them outside the door. But they said they had stopped knocking on our door like an hour ago. Once my niece said that all of our eyes widened. We all still tried to get our minds off of it by watching TV. We kept getting calls from different rooms that were completely random, and all you heard was silence if you picked up. The tiny knocks still happened about every 10 minutes. Finally we were done with all of this and we packed up all of our stuff and called my niece and told them that we were gonna stay in their room for a bit and she said okay. She told us that once we got there to knock so she could let us in. So we started heading to her room. You could hear people talking about stuff while walking past all the doors but once we got to my nieces door everything went silent. We all looked at each other but not a word came out of anybody. Anthony knocked on the door and no one answered. We all looked at each other but still not another word. Jay called my niece but it went straight to voicemail. We all looked at each other again but with much more shock and not another word but it felt like our mouthes were frozen. Then the thing that scared us the most was when all of the lights in the halls way flickered 3 times. That’s when we ran back to our room.
Should I make a Pt.2?

Kausap ko yun male friend ko about his breakup sa long term gf nya at nagseselos siya nakikita nya sa fb stories na after 3 months parang nakamove on na si exgf nya kasi nag road trip na with a guy friend.
Ang bilis daw bumitaw ni exgf ang babaw lang naman daw ng reason. Well yun reason is nahuli ni exgf na may ibang kasweet talk si guy sa IG at 2 babae pa yun.
Me as a woman parang nagpintig yun tenga ko nun sinabi nya mababaw ang reason yun ginawa like WTF cheating pa din yun ginawa mo to call it as mababaw. Napansin ko din naging habit na nya pala madami kausap na girl while in a relationship.
I cant burn friendship but i still call him out na siya ang mali at may trust issue na sa kanila din..

I'm a day late posting this -- I'm sorry to have gotten off schedule! I realize there have been a lot of high-earner diaries recently, but I hope my perspective is still of interest.
​
Section One: Assets and Debt
Retirement Balance: $460K (mine) and $250K (husband’s). We both max out our annual withholdings. I’ve been working longer than him, and my employer offers a more generous match, which contributed significantly to my balance.
Equity: $275K. Our home is currently worth about $450K. We live in a M-HCOL area (far) outside of NYC, and our home was a fixer upper when we bought it. Honestly, it’s still a fixer, and we are saving towards a major renovation.
Cars: Maybe $15-$20k total…we drive two paid off cars. One is 13 years old, and the other is 10 years old.
Other Cash and Investments: $150K
Credit card debt: None, paid every month
Student loan debt (for what degree): $80K towards the grad degree I’m pursuing now. Since we’re saving towards the home reno, I’m financing my degree rather than paying for it outright. I know this is counterintuitive given the interest rate environment. However, the home reno has been a priority for us since we bought this home.
Daughters’ 529s: $75K
Section Two: Income
Income Progression: I've been working in my field for 13 years and my starting salary was $40,000.
I work as a Director of Financial Planning & Analysis in a niche field. I won’t go into too many details because it’s a small world. My salary progression was as follows:
Year 1: $40,000 starting, right after recession. I had an amazing boss who mentored me and recognized my potential. After six months, I received a promotion and raise to $60,000.
Year 3: Promotion and raise to $90,000, for a role with more financial and analytical responsibility. Although I worked hard, I continued to benefit from having a boss who advocated for me. I consider this a major turning point.
Year 8: Raise to $120,000 for additional responsibilities after a coworker retired.
Year 10: Raise to $135,000
I’ve received an average of 2.5% COLA increases and now earn $145K. My boss has requested a $10,000 bonus for me this year, which I haven’t yet included because it’s still under review.
My husband earns $260,000 base salary as a VP of a large corporation (this is a very recent raise…he was at $200K previously). In addition, he can receive a performance-based bonus of 20-30%. We don’t include his bonuses in our financial planning because they are not guaranteed and because a portion is RSUs. When he receives a cash bonus, we put it towards our daughter’s college accounts and/or our home reno fund.
Education: I have a bachelors and a masters in a field unrelated to my career. My tuition was paid by scholarships/assistantships. In addition, my parents covered my living expenses during undergrad. During my first graduate degree, I worked 3 part-time jobs to cover my non-tuition expenses. I’m now enrolled in a grad program more directly related to my career. My employer encouraged me to do this program and generously allows me the time out of office. In addition, if I stay for a certain number of years, they will reimburse a portion of my tuition.
Main Job Monthly Take Home:
Monthly take home: $6,300 after taxes, retirement ($1,875) and medical/dental benefits ($110– self only)
Husband’s monthly take home: $12,560 after taxes, retirement ($1,875), and medical/dental ($400 for him and our two kids)
Section Three: Expenses
Mortgage: $2,485 for principal, interest, insurance, and taxes. We refinanced to a 15-year loan at 2.3% when rates were low
Daycare: $3,510 per month (full-time for a toddler and preschooler)
Savings contribution: $3,000-$5,000
Daughters’ 529 accounts: $2,000 ($1,000 each)
Debt payments: $700 towards my student loans. This will increase once I’m done with my degree
Donations: $3,000 annually
Transit $350-400 for husband’s commute (3x/week to NYC)
Electric: $60
Wifi/Cable/Landline: $120
Cellphone: $180
Subscriptions: $59 for Netflix, Hulu, Disney+, Duolingo, Apple Storage, and credit monitoring
Gym membership: $149 for Pure Barre
Husband’s physical therapy: $130 (portion not covered by insurance)
Car insurance: $3,200 annually. (This seems high, considering we have good records, don’t drive much, and both cars are paid off. I need to look into this)
Life Insurance: $3,100 annually
Day 1 (Saturday):
6:00 AM: Wake up. I’m doing a modular course for my graduate degree, and the class wraps up today. I study for the exam that happens this afternoon. A little after 7, I walk to a nearby coffee shop and buy a large Americano for $4.50 including tip. When I’m back at the hotel, I pack up my room and leave a $20 tip for housekeeping. On the way out, I drop my bags at the bell stand. The hotel cost is covered by tuition.
9:00: Meet with my study team to finalize a paper and presentation that’s due today. At noon, we break for lunch (also covered by tuition). I have a salad and lots of carbonated caffeine. After lunch, we have an hour-long final exam.
2:00: Final course wrap up. It’s been an intense week-long session. I learned a lot, but am so ready to head home. I walk back to the hotel to retrieve my bags. Along the way, I stop to buy an empanada ($8 including tip). Then I call an Uber to the airport ($55 including tip). While in the Uber, I talk to my husband and daughters, who are 1.5 and almost 4. Due to the time difference, it’s their bedtime and if I don’t catch them now, I’ll lose my chance. I promise them that I’ll be home when they wake up in the morning. A lot of my classmates went to dinner together before heading to the airport. On the one hand, I have FOMO because my classmates are awesome. But on the other hand, it was really important to me to talk to my family, and I know I couldn’t have done that easily in a bustling restaurant (I’ve tried, and it was a frustrating experience for everyone!).
6:00: Arrive at the airport. I check my bag ($35). Once I’m through security, I pick up some souvenirs. My hotel wasn’t in an area with good shopping options, and the class days were pretty packed anyway. I get locally made chocolate for my husband. The girls get a small stuffed animal each, and a book to share ($70 total). Then I treat myself to crab cakes and a French 75 to celebrate the end of the week ($60 including tip).
10:00: On the flight, I read until the cabin lights go out and then try to sleep. I used to be able to sleep better on red eyes, but I wake up every 15 minutes.
Day 1 Total: $252.50
​
Day 2 (Sunday):
6:00: Flight lands and I gather my bags and take the parking shuttle. Although I parked in an economy lot, the total was still $174. Ugh – this has been an expensive week.
7:45: Arrive home. The girls crawled into our bed and are snuggled up next to my husband. The toddler wakes up as I come into the room and the look on her face when she sees me is priceless. Our preschooler wakes up soon after. It’s so good to be reunited with my people! We all head downstairs and have breakfast (waffles and cereal, plus a huge pot of coffee). It’s cold and rainy today and we spend the morning watching TV together.
10:00: Our toddler falls asleep for her nap, and my husband encourages me to do the same. Our preschooler is happily entertaining herself with Legos and puzzles, so I doze for a couple hours. Around 1:00, we all have turkey sandwiches for lunch. Then, I take over kid duty so my husband can finally have some time to himself. He spends the afternoon woodworking in his basement workshop.
2:00: Our preschooler’s birthday is coming up. I buy digital invites from Etsy ($12) and send them to Staples to print ($16 with a promo). They are ready in about two hours and we pick them up. My preschooler asks for kinetic sand at Staples and I cave in and buy it for her ($11). I constantly complain about the amount of “stuff” in our house, but to be honest, I’m guilty of contributing to the clutter. When we get home, I spend the afternoon doing crafts with the girls.
5:15: We heat up some leftovers that my in-laws dropped off while I was gone. We do the girls’ bedtime routine a little early since everyone seems tired. Lights out by 8:00 for the girls. Then I catch up on work email and start making a list for the week. For the purposes of this money diary, my husband mentions that he spent $270 yesterday restocking groceries. Then I watch Succession and head to bed
Day 2 Total: $387
​
Day 3 (Monday):
5:08: My alarm goes off because I typically go to Pure Barre on Monday morning. I’m still jetlagged so I decide not to go today. I hadn’t actually signed up for a class because I had a feeling this would happen.
6:30: Everyone else is still asleep, so I go downstairs to make coffee and enjoy a few quiet moments to myself. When my husband and kids wake up, we all have breakfast (frozen waffles and berries for the kids. English muffins for the adults).
8:30: Drop the kids off at daycare and then get to work. I work primarily from home, so I just have to walk upstairs to my office nook. I spend the morning prepping for an important meeting tomorrow with senior leadership. I get a reminder on our phone that our toddler has a well-child visit today…usually I sync my calendars, but I totally neglected to log this on my work calendar, and it conflicts with a meeting with our chief of staff. CRAP. I debate canceling the doctor’s appointment, but decide to keep it. Our toddler is getting vaccines today and if I don’t keep the appointment, I’m not sure when I can reschedule. I apologize profusely to our COS and ask if we can reschedule. She says not to worry, and that she appreciates the extra time in her schedule…hopefully I didn’t make a bad judgment call.
1:15: I quickly eat a turkey sandwich for lunch and then pick up our toddler from daycare for her appointment. These well visits usually take 30 minutes and are covered by insurance. As luck would have it, we spend 90 minutes waiting because they are running behind. Luckily, I have snacks and activities in my purse to occupy her. To pass the time, I browse for favors and paper goods for our older daughter’s upcoming party. I end up buying paper goods, decor, and favors ($67 from Target) and iced sugar cookies ($240 from Etsy). As I type this, I realize how bananas it is to spend that much on decorated sugar cookies. Our incomes have increased pretty dramatically in the past few years, and although we haven’t increased our fixed expenses, we’ve definitely succumbed to lifestyle inflation for one-off things like this. It’s something I need to be aware of. I’m finally home around 3:30, just in time for my next call. My husband is WFH today and takes over kid duty during this call.
5:15: It’s time to pick up our older daughter from preschool, but my call is running long so my husband picks her up. For dinner, we make salads topped with roast chicken. The toddler loves salad, but our preschooler proclaims “I don’t like green leaves – I’m not a caterpillar!”. Well, okay then.
8:30: We do the girls’ bedtime routine, and then I continue prepping for tomorrow’s meeting. I wrap up around 1:00 am. While I’m working, husband preps two meals that just need to be reheated sometime later in the week. Good night!
Day 3 Total: $307
​
Day 4 (Tuesday):
7:30: Kids and I sleep in a bit this morning. My husband left home around 5:45 since he’s going into the office, so the three of us are on our own. For breakfast, the toddler has toast and berries. The preschooler has bran cereal and a frozen waffle. I eat their scraps, washed down with coffee.
9:15: I drop the kids off at daycare a little late this morning. Then I get working and practice the presentation I’m giving at 11:00
12:05: Call is over and I think it went as well as could be expected. I make myself a turkey sandwich for lunch. Then I go to the post office to mail a birth certificate request for our youngest daughter’s passport application. The cost for the birth certificate is $50. I also spend $15 at the post office to mail the envelope and buy stamps. Then it’s back to work.
5:10: Pick the girls up from school. My husband gets home around 6:45. Dinner tonight is a tofu and broccoli stir fry with rice. I don’t cook much, but I make this meal weekly and it’s everyone’s favorite. The secret is that I use soy sauce that is seasoned for seafood. I can’t explain what’s different, but the taste is so much different than standard soy sauce.
7:30: Bathtime and bed for the girls. I text with a mom from daycare whose kids are the same age as ours. We arrange a playdate for an upcoming weekend. I’m hopeful that she and I will develop a friendship – making friends is hard when you’re an adult!
9:10: I debate doing schoolwork or “work work.” Schoolwork wins tonight…I spend about two hours prepping a case study.
Day 4 Total: $65
​
Day 5 (Wednesday):
5:30: Wake up and start working. I still have a lot of deliverables to catch up on. Husband leaves as usual to commute into the city.
7:00: I get an email and text message that daycare had to close today due to unforeseen circumstances. There was an issue with their plumbing that impacts the whole building. Oh no – I immediately feel a pit in my stomach. I really can’t afford this today, especially because I am out this Friday for another day of class. Although our preschooler is pretty independent, our toddler needs constant supervision. She’s always a moment away from jumping off a couch, climbing on a table, or otherwise causing herself bodily harm. My husband has multiple meetings with his division president today so he can’t realistically come home to help. Argh. I feed us all breakfast and prepare myself for a difficult day. I send my boss an email to let him know the situation, but promise to stay on top of my work after hours as needed. I also log a half day of PTO in the payroll system…I figure I can probably be about 50% productive today.
10:00: Our toddler falls asleep for a nap, so I frantically send out emails and run reports. Our preschooler watches shows on her tablet.
12:15: Toddler is up from her nap. Our poor preschooler has been on her tablet for too long and her eyes are glazed over. I decide to take the girls out for lunch to break up the day. We go to Jersey Mikes since it’s nearby and fast. The girls each have a kids meal and the toddler is delighted that it includes a kids cup. I have an Italian sub ($29). We eat outside and the preschooler hums and loudly proclaims "I love Jersey Mike's!"
1:30: We get back home and I jump on an internal call. Thankfully the girls are well behaved and don’t cause any disruptions, beyond waving hello at the start of the call.
3:00 I have another call and the girls are again on their best behavior. PTL. Maybe I’m just lucky, or maybe it’s that I bribed them with cookies.
4:45: I wrap up the workday a little early. I take the girls on a walk since the weather is nice. When we get back inside, they immediately melt down. The toddler wants to be held constantly, which is a challenge because she weighs 24 pounds. The preschooler is thrashing, spitting at me, and throwing toys. I resist a really strong urge to scream or cry or break something or hide in the bathroom – maybe all at once. Instead, I heat up one of the meals my husband made earlier this week. When our preschooler calms down, she asks if I still love her when she’s bad. She’s been asking this question a lot recently, and it makes me wonder if it’s just a phase, or if she needs more reassurance from us. Either way, it's heartbreaking to know she worries about this.
7:30: Husband had a late meeting, so he gets home later than normal. We do the girls bedtime and bathtime routines. We get another note from daycare saying that the plumbing issue is, unfortunately, still unresolved. We’ll get a tuition credit, but they will be closed another day. Husband and I talk through logistics. We agree that he’ll go into the city again tomorrow and I’ll handle the kids. His company is in the middle of a major reorg and it’s important for him to be there in person. We decide to ask his parents if they are available to help tomorrow. Between work, the kids, and my grad program, sometimes I feel like the only thing we talk about is logistics. It’s been at least 6 months since we’ve been on a date.
10:00: I catch up on work, and also prep for school this coming weekend. I go to bed a little after 1:00.
Day 5 Total: $29
​
Day 6 (Thursday):
5:45: Husband is up and out of the house at his normal time. I wake up and run some financial reports while I have the chance.
7:30: Kids are awake. While they eat breakfast I pack their activity bags and snacks since we’re going to my in-laws today. They are semi-retired and often help when we have childcare hiccups. They are truly a godsend. They live about an hour away and we arrive at their house a little after 10:00. On the way, I fill my car up with gas ($52).
12:30: The girls are having a blast with my in-laws. We take a break for lunch, which is chicken nuggets and hummus for the girls. I eat their scraps and also have some Greek yogurt.
4:15: I have a full afternoon of calls, but it goes smoothly thanks to the grandparents. We leave a few minutes after 5:00 and both girls fall asleep before we reach the first traffic light. This makes for a peaceful drive home. Traffic is heavy so we get home around 6:30. I open the mail, and find a surprise medical bill for $572. This is for the toddler’s trip to the ER…14 months ago! This is the first bill we are getting and honestly it had completely slipped my mind. She had a triple infection and ended up severely dehydrated. Seeing this bill dredges up all sorts of unpleasant memories. I’m grateful we have the means to pay this without issue, and I’m grateful she is healthy. I understand it's a privilege to pay a bill like this without thinking twice.
6:45: Husband arrives home. We reheat a pasta dish he made earlier this week and have a salad on the side. The girls are beat today, so we skip bathtime and let them go straight to bed. Thankfully, daycare can reopen tomorrow. I feel like a weight’s been lifted from my shoulders, especially since I have class tomorrow.
9:00: I have a call with my school study team to work on our group project. It lasts for about an hour.
10:30: Husband and I discuss buying a swing set for our backyard. He’s narrowed it down to two choices, and they’re both awesome: three swings, a rock wall, slide, and clubhouse area. I think they both look great, so I leave the final decision in his hands. The total with shipping and tax ends up being $1760. We considered buying a pre-assembled swing set to save time, but similar models cost nearly $6K. He’s handy, so he said he’d prefer to assemble it himself.
Day 6 Total: $2,384
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Day 7 (Friday):
6:15: I have class today so I eat breakfast and get dressed early. I tend to wear a lot of athleisure when working from home. Today I put on a structured ponte dress and hastily apply Tarte makeup to give my skin some color. Every time I make the effort to get dressed, I'm reminded that I really do feel more confident when I look put together. I get to school around 9:00 for my first class.
12:00: Break in my schedule for lunch. I eat a salad and some kind of chicken dish, while catching up with classmates (covered by tuition). For dessert, I have a huge bowl of berries. Lots more coffee to keep me awake and engaged during class.
7:00: Classes are over for the day. I pay parking ($17) and am on my way. I get home at 8:30, in time to do bedtime with my girls. Husband made veggie quesadillas with black beans and guacamole, which I eat once the girls are asleep. I check my work email to make sure nothing is on fire. Then my husband and I watch an episode of “What We Do In the Shadows” and turn in for the night.
Day 7 Total: $17
​
​
WEEKLY TOTALS
Food + Drink: $371.50
Fun / Entertainment: $2,106
Home + Health: $572
Clothes + Beauty: $0
Transport: $333
Other: $155
Weekly Total: $3,537.5
Reflections: Some of this week’s expenditures were unusual: the swing set, my travel expenses, and that old ER bill are not part of our normal recurring expenses. However, the rest of this week's spending was pretty typical. I realize a lot of this diary revolved around sorting out childcare disruptions…honestly, that takes so much mental and logistical energy on a weekly basis. Writing this diary also made me realize how little time my husband and I spend together. Often we feel like we’re in survival mode, but we need to be more intentional about prioritizing our relationship.

1. Start on high point bridge.
2. Yeet iron demon flask down at the patrol.
3. Watch funny cutscene featuring a patient demon.
4. Summon pet to get a turn in the combat.
5. Stop on your turn in the combat.
6. Stealth a character down into the area.
7. Blow horn to summon three large friends.
8. ???
9. Profit.

Hi all,
I am overwhelmed with information on how to decide which vacuum is best for our needs.
Currently, we have an approx 1400 sq.ft. home, with a mixture of hardwood and tile & 1 high-pile area rug. We are pet friendly with cats that shed tremendously.
We need a vacuum that is compact and portable with decent suction on our shag rug. We have zero storage space in our home currently, which is why we desire a stick vacuum and not a typical upright vacuum. Other features that are desired: LED light, slim fit (to navigate under our couch) and a replaceable battery. I’ve read through several posts and have seen that Sharks are not well recommended due to longevity. However, I am not as concerned with longevity so much as fitting our current needs. We hope to move in a year, at which point we will invest in an upright vacuum.
Ideal budget is under $500. We are based in the US.
Thank you!!

She's a little over 2 months old. I got her as a gift from a coworker some 3 weeks ago. Ever since I've had her, all she does is scratch my door, hide under the bed, or attempt to enter the fridge. I'm sure she knows her name by this point, but most of the time she does not respond or will only come to me if I have food or a treat for her, then quickly go away.
I have made attempts to bond with her. Petting her whenever she's close, giving her treats and petting her when she (eventually) responds to her name (or otherwise hand-feeding her whenever its feeding time), trying to get her to cuddle (she likes getting on the bed but not when I'm using it), playing with her (she's largely uninterested in toys)... nothing is working. I really try.
She's only a lap cat when I'm at the table eating something. She'll attempt to take a bite or a lick. I try to move her away, yell no at her, blow her face, or tap her head. None of it makes her stop and I don't want to hit her. I might just have to but what would be the point if I'm trying to make her bond with me, not hate me or fear me? By the way, she doesn't dislike her cat food, so that can't be a reason for this behavior.
She's not a friend, she's not my pet, she's just an animal that kinda just lives in my house and that I have to look after because it's my responsibility. I'm largely ignored by her unless she wants food... that's it. This isn't fun.

Hi, so...
I'm gonna talk a lot. It took me an hour to type this on my phone, apparently... 😅 But, if you just want the meat of my rant, skip to the very bottom, the "where life has me now" part. Or, better yet:
TL;DR - I have no friends anymore, my ex was my best friend and now I have no one. I've had a rough few weeks what with everything that's gone wrong (one after the other, thanks 2023), and I just don't have anyone to process it with. I miss my best friend...

Backstory, I guess

I was in a poly relationship for 7 years with this girl. Primary partner. She sometimes had other boyfriends but none ever stuck. I saw a few other people too but never even got to the point of calling it another date. It worked out more like we were open/ENM rather than poly, but anyway, just setting up some color to the backstory. We were all but married, owned a house together, raising her step-kids together, got pets together... all that. "Married" but not married.
We were both friendly with this guy we knew from community theater. She got close to him almost a year ago, they started seeing each other. Grew feels. We were poly so I was excited for her. Yay!

The decline...

After a few months, she reveals that he is monogamous. Ugh, not the first time she's dated a mono guy, but he wanted to chat with me and I did too, so I was hopeful we could understand each other better.
She started pulling away from my touch, trying to avoid contact with me so as not to upset her new boyfriend. Uhh... anyway, he was constantly busy and never had time to chat with me, and then she at one point asked if I would even care if she broke up with me. Obviously, lol, why wouldn't I be upset about it? Of course I would care!
We kept fighting over little things more and more for the next month, until I snapped and suggested we break up since she seems so sure I'm awful now.
When we talked about it a few days later, she said she's ready to be done with me, doesn't think she'll ever feel romantic for me again, didn't want to even try couple's therapy (unless it was necessary to salvage our friendship), and that she had these issues with me for years so it's not even new. (My takeaway from this is that she was convincing herself that I was worse than she remembered in order to feel less shitty about breaking up with me for her new boy.)
She had said when/before we broke up that she would take a break from her new boy too. Naturally once we broke up, she changed it to "just a break" with me, but no break with him, because "that wouldn't be fair to him" and "the heart wants what it wants".
Whatever... I still held out hope.

The break

So, for the next four months, we still lived together. At first we were okay with sharing the bed and just made it a point to not touch. Sometimes we'd sleep on the couch but usually just split the bed.
She continued to see him, sometimes 2 days out of the week, sometimes 6 days of the week. I kept making dinner and hung out with her two kids (13 and 15). Oh, I forgot to mention that I work full time and am also in college classes nearly full-time, so I'm always busy with homework too. No matter. The point here is that she's not around much, which is fine but feels like a lot at times.
I did reach out to her a few times after two months, asking to get some time with her, check in, hang out, whatever. She kept having plans already, so I'd shoot for a week or two out. She'd halfway make plans, then the conversation would die. When it would come around, she would blow me off, "oh they needed me for a few extra hours at church, sorry!". (I believe her, but it's clear I ranked lower in priority than anything). Other times she "could be home after lunch, which happens at 11"... but then "after" was apparently 5pm. (She goes to bed around 7:30, and doesn't usually want to do anything this late in the day.) After a few tries like this, I gave up.
I finally asked her if we were done. I wanted to have the conversation in a park or restaurant or something... she refused and instead we had it with her sitting in bed with her PJs on, practically hiding under the covers. I told her I had about 40% desire left to see us fix things, that it has been dwindling since she keeps acting like I'm a stranger, but there's still hope. She just repeated that she doesn't see us ever being romantic again, so when I asked her to put it to a number, she said 0%.
So, that's it. Done.

Moving forward...

That was about a month ago? We still live together while we work out the house. I want to move, and I'd rather sell altogether. She can't refinance to buy me out, but she wants to stay. Ugh... so we might work something out to where we split equity on sale later down the road.... that's a whole 'nother headache that I won't even get into just yet, because I've got other problems right now.
We split the room up a little... I now have a cot in here, so we sleep separately. For the most part we do okay as roommates I suppose, but it's still awkward as fuck living with my ex. I still consider the kids mine too, but it feels weird when they're all hanging out together. I guess it should, though. Hrm.
Anyway.

Where life has me right now

I haven't been great about keeping in contact with friends. I was friends with her friends, though, but while we rarely see them anymore anyway, I feel like they're even more unavailable now. (She actually told them not to hate me on her behalf, that she still wants some friendliness between all of us... but, whatever. It's dead.) So, I'm alone.
The kids are teenagers. I still feel familial with them, but there's always been a little bit of step distance between us. One of them just came out as trans.
My bathroom skylight has a hole in it. First people I brought out tried hard-selling me a whole new roof. Yeah, that shit was a horrible experience. Anyway, next guy who came out just quoted me for a skylight. Pfft. It's always something though right?
My old car has been leaking everywhere for the last few months, and finally stopped starting (intermittently). I suspect it's a head gasket, but I'm not a mechanic so idk. I've been considering car shopping anyway, so maybe now is the time, especially since the mechanics looking at my car have pointed out two sensors to start troubleshooting with for $580, and aren't sure if that's the fix. That's a little expensive for troubleshooting what could be a head gasket... so, cue car shopping under duress.
We talked with a lawyer this week about the house and splitting the equity on sale when she moves out, because again, she doesn't want to move (because of the kids), and I do. That turned into an argument where she thinks I'm the bad guy trying to evict her kids because I won't accept so little, and me standing my ground saying I deserve more than just what the current equity is right now because at minimum I should get interest on it since I'm unable to touch this money for 4 years (per the current plan), much like a loan.
Anyway, we talk and eventually she cools down. She lets me borrow the car for the weekend at least while she's camping with her boyfriend. Cool.
I realize I picked too high of a monthly commitment for the car I want, so I spent the long weekend re-budgeting to see what I can afford, and where I need to cut back on my spending.
I've been looking at cars and shooting a few to a coworker friend and an old friend who is also going through a divorce that I chat with sometimes. Both respond here and there but aren't engaged with helping me. I don't blame them, they have lives too, but it leaves me feeling like I'm on my own here. Fine, I can't expect people to help me make financial decisions anyway.
Go to the dealership by myself this evening... The dude I work with... It feels like he's misread me, like he thinks I want some hot new car, rather than something functional and cheap. He seems to be annoyed that I'm taking my time to look at things, and didn't fall for his lease pitch. We bargain, I get some good numbers, so it was all around fine... but it's clear we both want to be done with each other for the day. He mentions they're closing up shop, I take my leave to think about it for a day.
Anyway. Now I'm home again. On my cot.
I just want to decompress and process my day with someone, but I just don't have anyone to talk to. I mean, there's people I can talk to but goddamn I don't feel like I have anyone I can just level with, at least not when I need them.
Goddamn I feel so alone.
I lost my best friend, and the shell of her is sleeping one bed away from mine.
I... and, maybe I should get out more, but first I need a car, and my house fixed, and free time separate from school, and not worry about coming to an agreement with the house, and maybe it would be nice to have moved out so I can finally mentally move on.... Maybe then I'll have free time for making new friends. Idfk. Is this just another excuse? Am I just not a social person, and now I'm suffering for it during my most challenging period of life?
I hate this.

Like the title says im looking to meet more trans folks in general! Id love to make new platonic friends, find some sexting buds, and if we're close by im open to fwbs, kink partners, and relationships as well
Im polyam and into any and all genders (generally not interested in cis people though), kinky and very much a sub. Im an awkward leftist dork that likes making art, animals, listening to podcasts, reading, video games, and being comfy.
Not how to start a conversation? Ask me about the ridiculous number of pets i have, tell me your favourite dad joke, or your best worst pickup line

I know for a fact no one actually read these cause I've said shit in here about committing or asking for advice to not commit. Well it doesn't matter cause I'm not venting about that. It's about one of my exes... I have this ex who broken up with me in February or this year. They were the best man I've ever dated even though it was online. Every night basically we would talk and FaceTime each other. He even gave me many sings for recommendations. He treated me like a queen. Well, I keep remembering on this one call we were in, he kept muting himself. During this time, we weren't yet comfortable to FaceTime each other so it was over voice. Well he was talking to his friends and kept muting himself with make me nervous. Well I asked him why and he said it was nothing. I stressed over that cause when he finally told me it was for our future I felt some relief. Well we don't have a future anymore because of my stupid fuckin ass. Got I just wanna stab my heart out. What makes everything worst is I keep finding songs that remind me of him and these posts I have. I've already fallen for someone who fuckin deleted their account cause I confessed to them that I liked them. It's not my fault I easily fall for someone when they call me pet names and saying I love you or goodnight. And it's just getting worst with my family. I found out my mom, my own fuckin mother, is trying to get rid of me. It's hurt to know that she doesn't have the God damn guts to tell me but tell my brother. What in the living hell?! I should just taken more than 7 fuckin pills the night I tri3d to commit suicide! I'm just a pussy! A heartless freak who shouldn't have the existence to live! My friends can't even help me! My only purpose is to help others which I'm shitty at! I just want to get (someone's) gun and pull the trigger to my heartless body. But I can't cause "so many" people care about me when no one actually does. I'm not fuckin stupid and I can see when someone is unpleasant with me. Even if it's online. I'm just done with everything. I'll probably try to overdose again when I go back to my mom's again and I'm home alone... I know where she hidden the pills...

I’m having a hard time deciding what pet insurance to get for my dog. Cody (5yo F) English Springer Spaniel, has been having multiple vet trips in the past year for a variety of reasons so I figured going forward I should invest in pet insurance. She has a pre disposition to hip and elbow dysplasia due to her breed and I’m looking for insurance that could cover those issues. As well as cancer treatments, exam fees, diagnostics, surgeries and prescription medications.
I’m looking for something budget friendly but I’m open to anything less or around $100/m, and I would like a short waiting period. I don’t want to know about trupanion and fetch, as I’ve already knocked them out of the running.
Any advice or information about the topic would be appreciated, thanks.

I (23 F) attended EDC last year with a friend and stayed on the strip. Neither of us felt unsafe and had lots of fun, but we stayed vigilant. I'm not going to have anyone to go with next year, so I'm thinking about camping so I would be around people that are in Vegas for the same reason and make friends there. Another option could be to stay at one of the hotels that have a shuttle stop and all of food/entertainment I would enjoy. With that, I only worry about walking back to my room at 4am alone. I can't imagine that being an issue really, but you never know.
What are your thoughts?

My friend of 15 years adopted a dog about 1.5 years ago from a local shelter with her then bf. She has become obsessed with this dog… which I’m completely shocked by because she’s a very level headed person and never mentioned even liking animals before despite having a dog growing up.
I find it ultra annoying that she has to constantly bring up the dog in one way shape or form. I ask what time I should come over? “Well I need to take my dog for a long walk first.” How was your holiday weekend? “oh good, I got invited to a get together and got to bring my dog so he ran around all day and was pooped.” Literally the dog mom identity has completely taken over.
Let me say that I enjoy animals/pets as I have my own, but I literally hear more about this dog than about my friends human babies! Her dog is a perfect bill of health, no special needs or anything noteworthy that would warrant constantly bringing him up.
I haven’t said anything to her about how annoying it is because I didn’t know how to talk to her about it without being offensive. But today she blew off a get together I was hosting because she “felt bad about leaving her dog especially bc she works in the office tomorrow”- she had plans in the morning that weren’t dog friendly and got home around 12:30pm. My party was at 6pm. You’re telling me that your dog can’t handle being alone from 6-8pm after hanging out with him for 5 hours?! (She also puts her dog in doggy daycare when she’s in the office.)
I told her I was annoyed that she wasn’t coming and that I can’t understand letting any pet/animal dictate social plans. She responded genuinely perplexed why I was upset and said that she’s trying the best she can now that her and her bf broke up (happened 6 months ago) to balance taking care of the dog and social things. And that he’s her “kid.”
I’m so over the obsessed dog mom that my friend has turned into. I don’t want this to become a bigger thing but I don’t know how to go about this conversation. Any advice?
TLDR: My friend has turned into an obsessed dog mom and after she blew me off for her dog today, I have to explain to her how ridiculous she’s being in a way that doesn’t escalate things further.

As the title states she called me in tears because she doesnt know what to do. I sent her info for the BC RTB but she wont be able to call them until tomorrow and she says shes surrounded by them. Not sure what to do here. Withhold rent? Get a hotel and invoice the property manager? I want to get her out of there asap but for the time being until she finds another place what can we do? I dont live in her city and shes told me she has no friends she can stay with. She is in New West if that helps and I believe its subsidized housing as she has a disability.