Brooklyn park assisted living

I just need people to ask about this who aren’t involved. I am the HOA president.
Approximately 2 weeks ago there was an incident where a board member’s dog (will refer to as HW) bit a person (will refer to as BIT) who was in our private community park but does not live in our community. They are friends of another board member (will refer to as NZ) and are in our neighborhood regularly hanging out with this board member.
HW is crazy, he has harassed people for many years, but he stays on the board because he has a lot of votes from foreign homeowners that rent out their homes in the neighborhood who no one else knows or speaks to.
I do not know the details of the incident - while I’m inclined to believe BIT and NZ’s story, HW’s story is different and I don’t have any way to know for sure what happened.
HW is now harassing the board asking for 2 things - - The board to ban BIT from the neighborhood for being “litigious and a risk to our neighborhood liability” - NZ to be removed because she has “lied” about the incident and has supported BIT
HW is threatening to sue the board if we do not take immediate action for negligence. I don’t know how to involve our lawyer because they work for the board and he is on the board - when we had incidents with him in the past involving our lawyer they said they couldn’t help just part of the board (but we now have a new lawyer - I have not really worked with them yet).
Personally I think HW is just taking every retaliatory action he can think of because he is sad his dog might be taken by animal control (this is not the first biting incident). Even so, he is threatening to sue me and as such I’ve stopped responding on the email chain and it’s just HW and NZ. NZ is being extremely kind and HW is being extremely mean and I’m worried NZ will quit the board even though she’s wonderful.
Thoughts? What would you do?

Let me tell you a bit about myself.
My Name is Owen. I'm 19 years old and I live in Massachusetts USA.
Im an EMT (a person who rides on the ambulance) I love hiking, fishing, hunting, sports, video games and enjoying nature. My passion is helping people. My favorite Book is the Yellow wallpaper. My favorite show is south park and my favorite games are warframe and doom.
I also have a few interesting facts about myself. I'm a 3rd degree black belt. I played goalie in lacrosse and defense in hockey.
I have very little time to myself so I'm trying to meet people. Maybe come chat with me for a while?

Context: The one-armed knight known as Sir Calabas approached your werewolf pack years ago with news that one among you held the power of a hero that once defeated the world-ending dragon, Asmond. He gave your father, the Alpha werewolf, the rusted hilt of a bladeless sword, calling it the Blade of Ember, and tasked him with finding the hero. Your older brother was selected and you've helped him train for the big confrontation as best you could. It seems the day has come. Asmond has awoken and the hero must confront him. You know your brother will win... right?
Setting: The werewolf village/ Mt. Ironside
Tags:[MMM4A][Kind Knight Speaker][Mean Older Bro Werewolf Speaker][Dragon Speaker][Kind Werewolf Listener][Prophecy][Slay the Dragon][Lore Drops][Enthusiastic][Underdog Listener][Fantasy][Magic][CW: Themes of Abuse/Neglect]
Usage: You may tweak or record this script. Gender flipping is OK! Please credit me if you use this script in any of your projects. If you would like to use this script for a paywalled recording, please note:
Monetization: All forms of monetization are OK with me! Youtube, Patreon, etc. I would appreciate being able to listen to the recording, if possible. Let me know if you have any questions. Thank you!
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[K] = Sir Calabas, the kindly one-armed knight
[B] = Remrik, your older brother
[A] = Asmond, the world-ending dragon
[Scene opens within your village]
[SFX: Old-timey village ambiance/ the occasional howl followed by a horse trotting along and armored feet hitting the ground]
[You sit underneath the hut you call home when you see a familiar man wandering into your village]
[Pause!]
[You wave at him and he approaches with a smile]
“Runt! Good to see you again, little one. What are you doing underneath your hut?”
[Pause]
[His smile wanes slightly]
[K] “Ah. Your father is nursing a hangover and wanted you out of the house to sleep it off. Well, I suppose it’s good your Aunt is so good at covering the duties of an Alpha werewolf, hm?”
[Pause <3]
[K] “Hmhm… I know you don’t mind. Your enthusiasm is always a welcome sight amongst the other werewolves here if I might say. Getting your pack’s assistance in dealing with Asmond was already quite the trial, but you’ve always been a treat to speak with. Ah… With that said, is your brother about?”
[Pause!]
[K] “Ah, he’s polishing the sword’s hilt. Good. Have you seen the blade itself form yet?”
[...]
[The Knight raises an eyebrow]
[K] “He says he’s made the Blade of Ember manifest but doesn’t want to show it off until after Asmond is defeated? Mm… Has your father seen your brother manifest the blade?”
[Pause!]
[The Knight sighs in relief]
[K] “Good… It’d be incredibly unfortunate if the witch’s prophecy were wrong in the wake of a, well, world-ending dragon slumbering in the mountain. Especially when the mountain has begun to shake…”
[Pause?]
[K] “...Why does Asmond want to end the world?... Hm. You know, I never thought to ask him while he was ripping my arm off.”
[...]
[The Knight’s bitterness eases as he sees you shrink back from him a bit]
[K] “...Apologies, Runt. Part of being a hero is confronting people who cannot be reasoned with. Some people simply wish harm, and Asmond is one of them.”
[...Pause]
[He laughs a little]
[K] “You don’t understand but you’re still happy to see me?”
[The Knight smiles and ruffles your head gently]
[K] “Hm. Well, at least you’re happy to see me. I know werewolves and humans don’t typically get along but you’d think I’d have won your old man over with the whiskey by now, hm?”
[Pause]
[His smile fades slightly]
[K] “...Runt, you look like you got into a tussle with a wild boar. What happened?”
[Pause!]
[He listens, unreadable]
[K] “You’ve been helping your big brother train to slay the dragon? How so?”
[Pause]
[K] “...Sparring. And, ah, how have you found it?”
[Pause]
[He smiles at your enthusiasm. It’s a touch sad]
[K] “Yes, I imagine it is quite painful… but to see someone so young that loves their family so warms my old heart. You are earnest, Runt, even in the face of extreme cruelty.”
[Pause?]
[K] “Why do I say cruelty? Ah… I don’t mean to offend. I suppose it is just the difference in how humans and werewolves raise their children. My big brother and I would scrap all the time when we were young, but… he always knew when enough was enough. When to pull his punches… It seems like your brother is not acting in-”.
[SFX: A door swinging open]
[The door to your hut swings open and your brother hurries out, almost knocking you over]
[B] “Move, Runt! Sir Calabas, I’m ready to confront the dragon!”
[Pause!]
[Your brother rolls his eyes]
[B] “Runt, I told you, I don’t have time to show you the blade waking up! You’ll just have to wait until I slay the dragon, just like the prophecy said!”
[Pause <3]
[Man, your brother is so cool. But also ow that was totally a rock your knee landed on]
[K, stern] “You’d be wise to treat your sibling better, Remrik.”
[B] “Aw, Runt’s used to it. They know it’s all in good fun, right? Besides, the mountain is shaking… That means Asmond has woken up, right?”
[K, sighing] “Yes. You have the Blade of Ember, then?”
[SFX: Your brother patting the sword’s sheathe]
[B] “Raring to go, got it sheathed right at my hip!”
[Pause!!]
[B] “Yeah, yeah, I’ll be careful, Runt. I’m the hero, remember?”
[Pause!!!]
[The Knight smiles again as you cheer him on]
[K] “Hmhm… Come, Remrik. We must meet Asmond on his ground and strike him down. If we don’t…”
[B] “No way! We’ve got this, Tin Can! Runt, make sure to tell Da to put the feast on for when we get back! I’m gonna be swarmed in pretty she-wolves and hungry as Hell.”
[Pause!]
[You know that probably means you’re sleeping under the hut again but you’re too happy for him to care]
[K] “Take care, Runt. Come, Remrik, we must away!”
[SFX: The two of them hurrying off together]
[Pause]
[You go back into the house to try and find your Da. Like usual, he’s slumped in bed, snoring away. You go to shake him awake when your foot hits something metal]
[SFX: A door opening and footsteps on creaking wooden boards]
[Pause]
[SFX: Big ol’ werewolf snoring]
[Pause]
[SFX: Something metal skidding on a wooden floor]
[You look down at what you kicked and horror flies down your throat. The Blade of Ember sits discarded on the ground. As always, it looks the part of a simple, rusted sword handle, but you know its power]
[...]
[SFX: Runt grabbing the sword’s hilt and running like a mad person]
—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[Scene fades back into the insides of the mountain]
[SFX: The mountain shaking/rocks falling as Calabas and Remrik race through to the dragon’s den]
[K] “Brace yourself, Remrik! The den of Asmond lies just ahead!”
[B] “I’m ready, Sir!”
[SFX: Them running and then skidding to a stop]
[The small tunnel opens into an endless abyss of a cavern. A dragon the size of a small city is already lumbering to his feet, rumbling with displeasure]
[A] “Finally… I wake once more.”
[SFX: The mountain shaking from his voice]
[B] “BLEEDING GODS HE’S BIG!”
[K, sharply] “Do not give in to fear! Draw the blade and prepare to fight!”
[Remrik grabs at the sheathe a few times before he goes white as a ghost]
[B] “...oh fuck.”
[K, in disbelief] “You left the sword?!”
[B] “I might have left the sword…”
[The dragon lets out an almost polite chuckle, amused]
[Note: Recommend shifting vocals so that they sound farther away to shift to Runt’s perspective]
[A] “...Ten long years and you’ve grown no less bumbling, hm, Calabas? That kind of thinking is exactly why I got to enjoy gobbling up your arm.”
[K] “...Run, Remrik. Run back to your village and find the blade!”
[B, panicked] “B-But-!”
[K] “GO, GODAMN YOU!”
[SFX: The mountain rumbling harder]
[A] “No, no, I don’t think so. Prophetic heroes do tend to be so simultaneously annoying and underwhelming. What have you brought me, Calabas? A whimpering pup with his tail tucked between his legs, wondering why the smell of piss is so strong? Hmhm… Well, that’s fine. You’ll only have to endure the smell of burnt fur for a moment!”
[Pause!]
[SFX: The dragon sucking in a breath and blasting them with fire]
[B] “M-Mother!”
[K] “GET BEHIND ME, BOY!”
[You rush in with the sword hilt, swinging it wildly, not knowing what else to do. You’re not going to let this mean man hurt your brother or your friend, no matter what happens!]
[B] “R-Runt?!”
[K] “RUNT, NO!”
[SFX: The cry of a phoenix followed by an eruption of magic]
[The hilt begins to vibrate in your hand as you swing it again. Fire surges toward you. Your body is crushed by fear but the smallest ember in you pushes forward. You have to protect them]
[Pause!!!]
[A, horrified] “N-No.”
[B] “What?!”
[K] “...Runt…”
[SFX: An explosion of magical fire]
[You hold the blade before you, nearly blinded by the heat coming off of it. Runes flash, hissing in tongues you don’t know. Yet, you hold it as best you can, staring up at a creature a thousand times your size]
[A] “...the hero lives…”
[B] “What?!? B-But, I was-!”
[K] “The hero lives, indeed…”
[He turns to the dragon, staring him down]
[K] “...Flee while you can, Asmond. Know that for whatever deeds you commit, you shall face us in the end.”
[The dragon growls, staring you down. You look up at him, more baffled than anything, but growl like a proper wolf and step forward]
[SFX: The dragon growling/pause-beat/Runt growling, if desired]
[Pause]
[SFX: The dragon stepping back uncertainly]
[A] “...I should strike you all down… Here in this very moment!”
[K, coldly] “You can try.”
[That seems to shake the dragon. He lets out a huff of fear and takes flight, racing for the skyline]
[SFX: The huff noted above and big ol’ dragon wings flapping away]
[B] “...I don’t understand… Why didn’t the sword respond to me? The witch said I was the hero!”
[K] “The witch said that the hero’s spirit lived among your pack. I left it with your Alpha, your father, to determine who that was. Apparently, it was not you.”
[B] “But I’m the best warrior in our clan, I don’t-?!”
[Their arguing fades into the background as you decide now is a really good time for a nap]
[SFX: Distortion to show the Listener is passing out / a thud as they hit the ground]
[To be continued]
Note: This story hit me hard and I don’t know why, I’m just really proud of it <3
Second note: This script was written while I was listening to ‘Into Free - Dangan’ from Dragon’s Dogma.
Third note: Runt is eighteen, for those curious. Remrik is about twenty-two. Calabas is in his mid-thirties. That is why they are little bro-ing Runt so hard XD

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I got a huge increase in my monthly rent payment and I definitely need to get a higher salary by next year, so I'm not looking to get a Bachelor's. I would like to study something between 6 months and 1 year. I don't have any education and I mostly have worked in retail. Currently, I'm working in a unemployment office / career center, which I like. I assist people making their claims and orient and refer them to our services (career planning, professional networking, opportunities to get tuition paid, assist them with their resumes, etc.). I live in an area that there's no much going on, so I have to consider remote jobs in high-demand. I'm open to anything.
One option is tech. I started taking an IT course, but I didn't finish it. I took a Data Analytics course, but I found it boring. I like digital marketing and I have a basic knowledge, but I'm pretty sure employers will look for a proven record of projects you've been successful with, which will make it a field hard to get into. Seems fun for me building websites with WordPress and Elementor, but with other people having advanced knowledge in coding, my chances in web developing might be low. So the only option in tech I have in mind is cybersecurity, which seems straight forward.
Since my job is kind of human resources that is something I'm considering too. But not sure how easy to find a good-paying remote position.
And I'm also considering project management, just because it seems in high demand and that you can do it remotely. Not sure tho.
I'm open to study anything that is not over a year and that will not be hard to find a job. I don't wanna study something to then find out that every position requires you to have 5 years of experience. I'm also bilingual (English/Spanish) if that helps. I also speak a little bit of Portuguese. I have family nearby, so I'm not willing to relocate.
What should I study (even if I didn't mention it)? Every input will be appreciated. Thanks in advance.

As the title suggests, what would you go for with the following details? I am hyperaware that I am posting in a Hyundai subreddit :D Wondering if anyone has had similar considerations when purchasing their vehicles?
CONTEXT:
Had the 2016 Ioniq PHEV briefly and plugged that in every night. Really enjoyed driving that for the range and having a fresh 29 miles of EV every day. I was always "anti EV" (mainly because of range anxiety), then I test drove the Model 3 LR and really enjoyed the power, the minimal design, but probably need some getting used to for that tablet interface. I prefer the exterior look of the Ioniq more, just cause the Model 3 is literally everywhere where I live, but prefer the interior of the Model 3.
- Live in a climate that rarely ever drops below 40F
- Work from home on my online business
- home has solar
- Usual trips are to the grocery store, gym, and family's house, all within 10 miles radius
- will share with the lady, who would take the car to work 1-2x per week, probably around 15-mile radius
- Occasionally max ~60-mile round trip 1x / month to try new foods
- I always think we would go camping or take longer road trips to national parks and car camp (but in reality happens only once a year), or take the 2 bikes out to go bike riding
- 110V chargers in the garage, but not opposed to adding a L2 charger
- Own a '13 Subaru BRZ as my "fun" car. Mpg is not great (avg ~24mpg). I intend to keep it
- I've tried changing the oil on the 2016 Ioniq before and it was a PITA, NEVER AGAIN. I would definitely be taking that into the shop for oil changes, which is a time cost. For that reason, a pro is not having much maintenance to do for the Model 3.
GOAL:
- Preferred budget Ideally ~$30K or lower. Aware that the Model 3 is priced above this, but keeping in mind other costs like insurance + the $4500 federal tax credit
- relatively practical vehicle, and save on gas/money over time
- intend to keep long-term, maybe 10 years or so
- prefer to be able to fit 2 bikes (or larger equipment) occasionally
So the ultimate question is: which might you recommend?
I enjoyed test-driving them both, I know it's comparing apples and oranges a bit, that's why the $10K difference is substantial. Is the Tesla worth $10K more based on these goals/context? Or another way to reframe that question: would the $10K difference be better invested elsewhere? TIA!
THE CARS:2019 Hyundai Ioniq PHEV2019 Tesla Model 3 Long RangePrice (used)$22,000$32,000Mileage26K41KRange29 miles (EV); ~650 miles total~240-280 (310 EPA estimate)

Hello everyone I would much appreciate if you could help me find this anime I watched many years ago
its where their is this guy who seems to be living in somewhere which looks like tokyo/normal society but it looks a bit futuristic (maybe tokyo just looks like that in animes, anyways their is this guy who is involves in his life either landlord or roommate (probably roommate who is obsessed with beautiful girls) anyways the mc somehow meets this girl she is either a magic girl or some demon since I remember she fought with someone which knew her which had a rank so some kind of special person. Anyways I mostly remember this scene where it happens in the middle of the anime where this girl and the mc the guy go into a shop where she is like a VIP member or something where they weapons and I think the mc gets some weapon or item(I think a knife) and that item can somehow summon this girl which has light blue/light green hair to protect him and she feels no emotions or anything just like an item and she tries to help him train somewhere. For a fight I remember it being the final fight and all I remember is them fighting some main villain looking guy at the middle of some forest or park and them winning. Their might of been one more good person fighting I think female but I don't remember.
​
Also, the anime appears to be fairly new since the art style isn't old such as berserk or baki and also according to my excessive searching also chatgpt couldn't find it lil so potentially could of been made after September 2021.
Thank you all for reading this and I appreciate this very dearly.

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It features an ensemble cast that includes Florence Pugh, Harry Styles, Wilde, Gemma Chan, KiKi Layne, Nick Kroll, and Chris Pine. In the film, a young wife living in a 1950s company town begins to believe there is a sinister secret being kept from her by the man who runs it.
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What is the story of Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse?
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In the 1950s, Alice and Jack live in the idealized community of Victory, an experimental company town that houses the men who work on a top-secret project. While the husbands toil away, the wives get to enjoy the beauty, luxury and debauchery of their seemingly perfect paradise. However, when cracks in her idyllic life begin to appear, exposing flashes of something sinister lurking below the surface, Alice can't help but question exactly what she's doing in Victory.
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Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse Movies Details
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Miles Morales, Brooklyn's full-time, neighborly Spider-Man, is launched across the Multiverse after reuniting with Gwen Stacy. There, he meets a group of Spider-People tasked with guarding the Multiverse's very existence. Miles must rethink what it means to be a hero in order to save the people he cares about most when the heroes disagree over how to confront a new threat and set him against the other Spiders.
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Released: 2023-06-02
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Runtime: 136 minutes
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Genre: Animation, Action, Adventure, Science Fiction
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Stars: Shameik Moore, Hailee Steinfeld, Jake Johnson, Issa Rae, Daniel Kaluuya
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Director: Stan Lee, Steve Ditko, Avi Arad, Mary Hidalgo, Christina Steinberg
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I’m 16 and live in the UK for context.
I’m quite good academically and want to do a job thats hands on and preferably outdoors. I would do a STEM job if it involves being outdoors.
Also as a side note, would I be allowed to work in a American national park as a ranger if i’m foreign, as American national parks have always fascinated me.

Hello All, I’m an EA at a global public Fortune 1000 (pharmaceuticals, 10,000 employees) in Raleigh, NC supporting a C-level executive.
Overview: I’ve been an executive assistant for 12 years (career EA with a bachelor's degree). I am concerned that I am being underpaid in my relatively new job - 100k, 8% target bonus, unlimited PTO. I’m salaried, so not overtime eligible; however, I am not expected to work more than 42 hours per week.
Does anyone here live in the NC/SC region with similar stats? If so, may I ask for your ballpark salary range? Am I being underpaid?
Thank you for your guidance and feedback.

Part 18 A Delicate Situation (Part 1) (Part 17)
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"Aho, Zim, ni je na?" Msko was the first to notice and greet the relatively short, stout, and furry being that just waddled into The Hammer’s Control Center.
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"Ah, Administrator Zimuzari, I am honored you could join us." Atxika's eyes quickly shot up from the holographic display being projected from the table she was leaning on and landed on Kyim'ayik colony leader. "Have you had an opportunity to read through the initial report we sent you?"
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"Hello there, Mkso, Admiral Atxika. It's…" The reddish-brown ball of fur paused his adorable squeaking, half covered his mouth with one of his paws, and let out such a tremendous yawn that Atxika could see both the massive front incisors as well as the not quite as large, but still impressive, set of canines behind them. "My apologies, I woke up less than half an hour ago. But it is good to see you both, as well as an honor and privilege to join you in your Command Center, Admiral."
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"The honor and privilege are mine." Atxika bowed slightly with her pleasant smile still wide. "And I would like to apologize for waking you. It will still be a few days before we arrive at our destination and this strategy meeting could have waited."
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"No, no, no, that's alright." Zim quickly replied with his species' high pitch and chirpy version of galactic common while stretching out and flicking his long, shiny whiskers as he approached the military leaders. "I've already gotten about nine hours of sleep. Skipping the last hour or two has killed me yet! And I’d rather get started on this sooner rather than later.”
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Admiral Atxika had to put in real effort to prevent herself start cooing at the delightful manner with which Zim made his way over to the holo-table and climbed the stool-like chair designed for his anatomy. The long, wide, and flat tail distinctive of the Kyim'ayik was lifted just off the ground and stretched far back to balance the rest of the being’s body weight while the relatively short hind legs carried him along in an awkward, though comfortable, bipedal gait. With the limited range of motion in the squat, fuzzy man’s leg-like arms as he stretched, it was clear his species was more intended for quadrupedal locomotion. Despite that fact, the posture of the Kyim'ayik Administrator while he walked was far more similar to her own, or a human’s, than what she had remembered from her previous interactions with the species. However, as Zim stretched out his back to its full length, adding good chunk to his overall height, and began climbing the stool so he could have a proper view of holographic display, Atxika was suddenly reminded of a domesticated species of vermin-hunting musteloid from her species’ homeworld that were quite popular pets. Even though she knew this furry little man was a well respected guest on her ship, and a being from an Ascended species, she couldn’t get over how adorable he was.
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“I hope you didn’t wake the misses.” Msko commented with a sarcastic tone while shooting the beaver-otter a cheeky wink.
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“Nah, that woman could sleep through an atomic detonation.” Hearing the galactic common word for ‘atomic detonation’ be said with such an endearing squeak was pushing the Admiral to the absolute limits of her self control.
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“I can have some food and refreshments brought, if you like.” Atxika interjected while doing her best to keep her smile from growing too wide and showing all of her teeth.
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“Oh n-” Zim was about to politely decline before Msko interrupted him with a bit too much energy.
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“Yes, please!” The War Chief blurted out. “That restaurant Tens took me to in your Amenities Section was amazing! I knew this ship had a huge manufacturing capability, but I didn’t realize you’d have freshly grown food.”
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“I’ll have the private command facilities prepare something.” The Admiral quickly replied to ensure that Zim couldn’t refuse. “How does a zetloxoni platter sound?”
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“What are-” Zim began to ask before Atxika realized her mistake and explained.
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"Zetloxoni are fish fillets, rolled in a semisweet and highly nutrient-rich grain, and occasionally topped with more fish or other ingredients." The Admiral replied while typing into the display to bring up a holographic representation of the sushi-like dish she was describing. "This is what I was thinking."
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"That actually looks amazing!" The Kyim'ayik ears suddenly perked up and eyes grew wide with delight.
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"Wonderful! It's settled then." Atxika pressed in a few more commands to place the order then tried to redirect the conversation to reason for the meeting. "I find it is often easier to address delicate situations with a clear mind and full stomach."
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"Delicate?" The squeaky reply carried a noticeably sarcastic tone as Zim shifted his attention towards the holographic representation of a planet and saucer shaped ship orbiting it. "That looks like Arnehilians. Ain't nothing delicate about the Grays, except maybe their physical forms."
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"Well, they're definitely Arnehilians but…" Msko interjected with a hesitant tone that caught his Kyim'ayik friend off guard. "We don't think they're Grays."
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There was a second of confused silence as Zim stared into the War Chief's eyes to see if this was a joke. Before Nishnabe could bring himself to explain, however, Atxika chimed in to give the proper explanation.
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"What I am about to say is Level 8 classified information from Military Command and should be treated with the appropriate amount of secrecy. Do you understand?" After an incredibly professional and understanding nod from the Administrator, the Admiral continued. "We have confirmed the existence of a non-aligned, neutral-standing collective of decentralized Arnehilian groups who refer to themselves as, quote, 'the Greens', or the Free People of Sundered Arnehil. According to all reports, they are an ecologically-minded, nomadic, agricultural society who regularly travel in such a way as to avoid any means of tracking or detection by their… less peaceful cousins. However, there are a few who regularly check in with Military Command to avoid potential confrontations. There have been no indications that any of their groups discovered so far are violent, nor even capable of galactic standard levels of self-defense."
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"I thought those rumors were just misinformation or propaganda." Zim was now much more earnest as gazed upon the holographic saucer floating above the planet. "And you say they're even ecologically-minded?"
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"Our drones haven't detected any significant environmental disruptions." Msko sounded far more nonchalant about this situation than his long-time friend was expecting. There was no aggression or anger in his movements as he indicated towards a highlight portion of the holographic planet floating above the table and prompted the display to project a new hologram. "Their settlement is using solar and wind energy to operate their infrastructure and accumulate power reserves. From what we can tell, they're only a week away from finishing their agricultural harvest and two weeks away from their power reserves being fully recharged. If we had been delayed a month, there's a good chance we would have missed them completely."
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“What kind of resource impacts would I have to account for?” The Administrator quickly followed up.
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“Maybe a couple hundred tons worth of basic elements and organic matter.” It was clear Msko had already scoured everything and couldn’t find any reason to be concerned. “But the drones' sensors can’t detect any real difference between now and six months ago. Like I said, if we were delayed a month, we might not have even known they were ever there.”
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"I see…" There was a moment of pause as Zim stared at the highly detailed holographic representation of a temporary settlement located only a couple dozen kilometers from where he had been planning his own colony.
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The two military officers remained silent to give the Kyim'ayik Administrator all the time he needed to think about what he had just been told. Each species, without exception, had some unique form of architectural design and aesthetic, and the variety of buildings Zim was looking at were no different. The extensive use of cheap, easy to produce polymers, the simple, module construction, and rounded, nearly circular, aesthetic to all of the building were all clearly Arnehilian. However, there was something humble, almost intentionally so, about the lack of silver-metal detailing combined with the way the structures simply flowed into the untouched trees around them. Rather than a budding slaver-colony run by beings who thought themselves entitled everyone and everything, this looked like the respectfully maintained dwelling of a temporary guest who wished to remain discreet. Though the Administrator knew his duty to his people would normally demand he evict these uninvited squatters from his land, he couldn’t help but feel something almost kindred in what he was seeing.
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"Have you made contact with them yet?" Zim flatly asked, though he could already guess the answer. "Do they know we're coming?"
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"No and no." Atxika promptly answered, while letting her smile fall into a more professional expression. "Their ship is inactive, seems to be in a state of disrepair, and is currently in a free-floating, low orbit. According to our scans, their ground-based sensor systems are incapable of detecting our reconnaissance drones. However, they would absolutely notice our fleet entering the system."
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"Well, we don't wanna scare them." Zim finally squeaked out with a slightly giggle that sounded more like a chirp. "Reptiles always freak out when you startle them."
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It had been nine hours of working in the greenhouse when Mayor Harideth noticed the young dark gray-skinned, olive-drab clad messenger running towards him at full speed. Though he had known this young woman her entire life, she was a member of her community after all, he had never seen her running this fast. It wasn't the speed of her approach that made him stop what he was doing, rather it was the unadulterated fear plastered across her face. As Nalhilum sprinted down the path between the vertical hydroponic racks, a few of the Arnehilians in the greenhouse took notice, though didn't stop their work. When the young woman came to a sliding halt just in front of the Mayor, it looked like she was about to keel over from exhaustion and stress.
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"My dear, please." Harideth had a genuinely concerned expression on his scaly face as he quickly moved to brace the young woman and prevent her from falling over. "You are too young to give yourself a heart attack running like that. Whatever is happening, you don't need t-"
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"Mayor, we've been detected." The dread that came out of Nalhilum's voice and the tears in her eyes as she looked up at her community leader shattered the man's soul.
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"Do not fear, Nalhilum, my dear. Please sit and rest. We will be fine. I promise." Harideth helped the young woman slowly lower herself into a seated position, plucked a just-ripe fruit from a vine he had been tending, and handed it to her before turning towards the closest other people in the greenhouse. "Maricha, please see to Nalhilum and ensure she recovers. I am needed in my mayoral duties immediately."
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In the few seconds it took for the worker to be at the young woman's side, she had already begun nibbling on the sweet treat, savoring it as this was her last opportunity, and the Mayor had given her a gentle kiss on the forehead then began running out of the greenhouse. Though Harideth felt he had a personal duty to stay at his messenger's side until she had fully recovered and ensured she wouldn't need further assistance, he had a greater duty to his community as a whole. Despite feeling the same fear that he saw in Nalhilum’s eyes, and wanting to ball up and hide with every fiber of his body, he charged as fast as he could towards the town hall building. Though he knew running this fast was not good for his health, especially in his old age and after working all day, the only thing on the Mayor’s mind was the safety and future of the people who trusted him with their lives.
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“Please don’t let it be the Oppressors.” Harideth muttered to himself as he ran as fast as his legs could take him. “By the Gods of Old, please don’t let it be them.”
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For nearly a millennium now, his people had been free of those who flew the red and gray flag and, despite the many hurdles and setbacks, they had found their own form of happiness. After the Dynastic family who had kept his working-class ancestors in literal chains had been dealt a devastating blow when their capital ship was overrun by a group of abducted, pre-Ascension beings, it sparked a revival of the Free People’s ideology in the slave population. Stories of people living together in mutual aid, love, and respect once only told in hushed whispers were shouted from the rooftops as most of the surviving members of the Dynasty were thrown from them. Once all of the slaves of the other species were freed and on their way back to their respective homes, the budding groups of Greens scattered into the interstellar winds to avoid reprisal from other Dynasties which were sure to want revenge. There was even a dream that they would find other groups of Free Arnehilians living among the stars.
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It was a blessing that their rebellion had initially gone unnoticed by the rest of the Arnehilian Dynasties and the greater community as that gave his ancestors time to disperse beyond the ability to be completely tracked down. Even if a few scattered communities eventually met their death or worse, the end of their freedom, there would be some who were able to survive and thrive. Though Harideth had assumed his nomadic village may eventually run into someone, he put a great deal of effort into minimizing that potential. In fact, he chose this very planet as their temporary stopping grounds specifically because it was far out of the way of most civilizations and people. After spending nearly a full season on this beautiful world, he had even started to grow attached to it and was looking for an excuse to postpone their migration in order to facilitate repairs to their ship. Being detected after so long, and with only a few weeks until they would have been ready to leave on their own, was something the Mayor could have never been prepared for.
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“Make a hole!” A person wearing a dull green cap shouted down a rather cramped corridor that Harideth was barreling towards at full speed before quickly pulling back and nodding towards the man as he passed.
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“Thank you, Chuzikum.” Harideth faintly mouthed while darting past the person and into the now cleared passageway that led outdoors.
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Finally outside, the man only slowed his sprint to turn a few corners and avoid running into the few unwary people who had failed to notice him coming. He was less than a hundred meters away from the town hall building housing his destination, the command and control room, and he couldn’t stop now. Regardless of how hard his heart was beating, how much he felt his body overheating from the strain, and how much he wanted to just collapse, he couldn’t fail his people. As the building got closer and closer, Harideth tried to think through all of the possibilities of who it could be that had detected them. Though none of the options that came to his mind were particularly pleasant, from Bendari pirates to Qui’ztar law enforcement or even the Oppressors themselves, he was already trying to work out contingency plans as he finally approached the already open door and his assistant waiting for him beside it.
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“Please close the door behind us, Marlati.” Harideth’s request was just barely audible as he crossed the threshold of the door and was quickly followed by his assistant who did as she was asked. “Who is it and what do they want?”
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“The communication signal we are receiving registers as the Qui’ztar Third Matriarchy, Mayor Harideth.” Marlati quickly and quietly replied as she followed the man towards the command and control room.
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“Oh, thank the Gods.” The Mayor stopped mid step and placed a hand on the wall next to lean and catch his breath for a moment. “This could still be very bad, but it could have also been so much worse.”
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“Um, sir?” The Mayor’s assistant watched him with a hint of concern as she could see how much he was overheating. “Would you like me to get you a cooling pack?”
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“Oh, no, that’s alright.” Harideth stood back up straight and continued towards his final destination, though a bit slower than before. As he turned back to his assistant, he gave a compassionate nod of approval. “You are too kind, my dear. This is just a…” The man’s voice trailed off as his thoughts began to concentrate on a plan of action.
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“A what, sir?” Marlati nervously in a manner which caused the Mayor to look back at her. “I’m sorry sir, but this is the first time this has ever happened in my entire life.”
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“First time for me too, Marlati.” Harideth admitted with a hit of nervous laughter. “But I do know enough about the Qui'ztar to not be issuing an immediate emergency evacuation order.”
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“That’s not very reassuring.” Though the whine that just came his assistant would have been grating in any other circumstance, she was right and the Mayor knew it.
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“That is the name of the game you help some of the children play, something of the magical planets?” Harideth stopped at the door to the room which separated him from his responsibilities as a Mayor.
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“Adventures of the Magical Worlds, sir?”
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“Yes! I believe there is a moral alignment chart in the rules somewhere.” Though it was clear that his assistant didn’t quite know what he was getting, it became incredibly obvious as he explained. “If I remember correctly, everything I’ve read about the Qui’ztar would put them roughly in the ‘hierarchical neutral’ category.”
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“Ah…” The assistance was quite hesitant as she knew what that actually implied. “That still isn’t very reassuring.”
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“They’re here to do a job. And as long as we comply and don’t get in their way, we’ll be fine.” The Mayor was doing his best to hold up his mask of confidence and not let this young feel what he felt.
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“And what if their job is to kill us?”
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“Then they wouldn’t have made their presence known. They would have simply shown up and sent us all to the next life.” However morbid that statement was, it actually did give the Marlati a small sense of real relief in the fact they weren't already dead as the door to the command and control room opened and the pair slowly walked in.
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"Sir! Thank the Gods you're here!" A communications specialist shouted from his seat in front of a terminal towards the Mayor as he quickly approached.
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"Of course, Telucima, I wouldn’t make you talk to them all by yourself." Harideth tried to crack a joke to the young woman behind the terminal in a vain attempt to calm her obviously flustered nerves. Though Telucima’s dark gray skin was never as shiny as a royal's, her face was especially dull and pale at the moment and the Mayor couldn’t help but empathize with her. “Now, please, give me your report. What do we know?”
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“Well…” Telucima made a gulping sound as she swallowed some of the semi-poisonous saliva that had been building up in her mouth as a fear response. “There is a fairly substantial colony fleet headed our way being escorted by the First Independent Fleet of the Third Qui'ztar Matriarchy. They have stated that we are inhabiting an unregistered settlement on a planet that has already been claimed by the Kyim'ayik. However, they have not yet made any demands, claimed our settlement is in violation of any laws, or even made any threats. I am absolutely sure they know who we are, but they didn’t explicitly identify us in their message. I’m not exactly sure what it is going on, but the signal strength and delay indicate they are still a day or two away.”
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“Interesting…” The Mayor commented with a more curious than scared tone while rubbing the top of his head in contemplation. “No demands, threats, or attempts to justify the use of force through galactic law… Is there any way we could get a real-time communications link established?”
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“Sir? You want to talk to them?” Marlati could barely contain her fear as she interjected. “I thought every species hated us, and you want to talk to them?”
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“They hate the bastard Oppressors, Marlati, though maybe not as much as we do.” Harideth knew this would be his one and only chance to make a good impression on what could otherwise be their impending doom and he was doing everything in his power to muster the inner courage needed for this conversation. “They may not know the difference between us and… them… yet. But something tells me they might.”
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“Sir,” Telucima had redirected her attention back to her terminal and was running through the system to facilitate the Mayor’s request, “I can establish a quantum link, though it would require me to activate the relay on the ship. If there are any oppressors nearby, there’s a chance they could detect our presence and attempt to use the trace to track us down.”
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“Do it.” The Mayor ordered with a tone that implied he knew the risks. “I want to see if these Qui’ztar would be willing to allow us to stay for the few weeks required to complete our harvest. Worst comes to worst, we’ll have to start packing everything up early and delay the repairs for another season.”
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The next few moments were nearly silent aside from the sounds of a tapping keyboard and the occasional digitized ping from the terminal. Telucima had begun the task of awakening the ship, configuring the communications channel, and activating the relay through text-based commands on a simple, monochromatic screen, while the other two people clad in simple olive-drab clothing could do nothing but fester in their thoughts. While Harideth was busy planning out how he was going to grovel and beg for permission to finish his people’s desperately needed harvest of fresh food, Marlati was simply doing everything in her power not to shake in fear. When the final confirmation ping came from the terminal and Telucima began pressing her headset tightly to her ears, the faint whispers of a translated voice could be heard.
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“Yes I can understand you…" The communications specialist, though lacking much previous experience in speaking with a member of another species, seemed to be focused solely on her job and not her fear. "Oh no, I'm sorry, this terminal doesn't have that function. It's… Yes, I can absolutely do that. Just give me one moment to set up the connection and I'll be right back with you."
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In a flash, Telucima had taken off her headset, stood from her console, and was moving to a nearby bag resting on a table, much to the shock of the other Arnehilians. Before either the Mayor or his assistant could question the young woman, she was triumphantly holding up her personal data-tablet and was returning to her seat.
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"What-" Harideth began before the young woman cut him off while pulling her tablet into the terminal.
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"Ope, sorry about that, sir." The specialist cut off her mayor and began to explain in a rush. "I was speaking to a communications officer and she wanted an audio-visual feed to link to her commanding officer. This terminal doesn't haven't that functionality, but I can just just patch a link through my tablet. It's got a mic and camera and we can use it as the display."
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“Good thinking, Telucima.” The Mayor laid a gentle, compassionate hand on the woman’s shoulder after she had placed the tablet at a good angle and sat back into her chair to type in the commands. “I knew you were the right person for this job.”
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“It was the communications officer’s idea, sir.” Telucima couldn’t help herself but to be honest regardless of the praise. “I’m just glad there were instructions for this kind of patch in the training manual. It should just take a moment to load.”
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When the relatively small screen came to life in front of the Mayor’s face, he saw three faces looking back at him with expectant eyes, and he froze in shock. Though none of the expressions looked out right hostile, he could tell none of those individuals would tolerate anything less than submission. Despite only ever seen descriptions of the being he was now looking at, all three could easily be identified. Even without his tail being visible, the furry, large-toothed person on the right was clearly a Kyim'ayik. The large, mostly-hairless, blue primate with pronounced tusks in the middle was, without a doubt, a Qui'ztar of particularly high rank. However, the not-as-large, similarly hairless, but copper-brown primate on the left was a species Harideth had a special fear, and particular reverence, for.
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“Are… Are you a Nishnabe?” Harideth stammered out before even introducing himself or allowing these beings to introduce themselves, which prompted the Qui’ztar and Kyim'ayik to turn to the now confused human.
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“Yes…” Msko replied hesitantly. “I take it you are aware of my people?”
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“Aware…” Harideth couldn't stop the heartfelt smile from forming across his scaly face. “You… Your people… the Vanquishers of Tyrants, the Bane of Oppressors, the Unstoppable Rage, and the Saviors of the Oppressed… Your people are the reason my people have been blessed with a thousand years of freedom!”

This is gonna be a long one:
Okay, I know I just have to speak up mote. But I'm just very frustrated and need to speak about this before I keep bottling it up and explode.
For context, he still lives at home with his father, I recently moved into an apartment almost a month ago.
My boyfriend got a Golden Retriever last September. Things were fine early on, but now she's approaching a year and is still completely untrained and I'm growing to resent her. Granted, being untrained is not her fault, it's his. And eventhough she is his dog, I have been sending copious amounts of videos on training, I have been giving little pieces of advice that I've gathered from dog lovers over the years, what I did with my dog before she passed. I wasn't perfect by any means, so I'm not expecting him to be, but it's like he's not trying.
If I don't tell him "we're going to the park and doing some socialization or training," it doesn't happen. If I do training with her, she regresses because he doesn't keep it up and reinforce it. She half listens to me, and rarely, if ever, listens to him.
She counter surfs like crazy. She's eaten 3-4+ entire chicken breasts, 2 entire steaks, a whole stick of butter, some trash, and more. Last week, his family had a cookout for Memorial Day. They let her out and she scared a small child by jumping on them and then jumped on the food table and started licking out the butter container and whatever else she could get her paws on.
She jumps on everyone, and almost knocks them down.
While I am an animal lover, I also have pet allergies, so I have to be strategic about things. I don't let her in my room because she sheds really bad, and if I have a flair up, I want one room I can go to get away from the allergy trigger until It calms down. In addition, she sleeps in the bed with him, everyone is different about that, but I personally don't like it and have expressed that to him. At his place, she is free to do what he and she wishes, but at mine I would not like for that to occur. She takes up the entire bed, sometimes has dirty paws and fur, and the fur being all over the bed isn't good for my allergies. I thought about compromising on letting her in the room because I had a small dog that I let in my room as I grew up, but... sigh. One time he came over before I got off work. She was in the room, I tried to be calm about it, maybe it'll be fine. Within seconds, she is jumping on my bed (I have an air mattress, as it's a new place). Not only do I have to worry about her popping the bed, but her paws were muddy and i had white sheets on the bed. My mom bought them for me so I was using them for a bit til the rest of my laundry got brought up from my storage in the garage and washed. So I had to strip my bed at 1:30am and wash the sheets so it wouldn't stain. He said nothing and went to sleep.
The rest of my apartment isn't completely together, so I use baby gates to keep her out of rooms where she could ingest something she shouldn't (she's tried to eat clorox wipes, hot sauce packets, everything). I had to make this man buy a trash can with a top on it (for his room at home) so she'd stop getting in the trash before it caused more serious issues. He refused for months but complained about her knocking trash over and eating things she shouldn't.
She has major separation anxiety due to never being away from him, and always being up under him. If we put her in the car to go somewhere, and he makes a stop at say, a gas station, she whines and panics the entire time until he gets back. I told him she needs to start having time away from him, so she can learn to self soothe. He didn't like it, but it's my apartment so I enforced it. Since staying in my 2nd room with a gate, she's taken more naps (she didn't sleep much before, always too hyper and too much interaction), plays by herself and can settle down, etc. We go in there and play with her, take her outside, and I try to do some training so she gets some enrichment as well. When she's around us (outside the room) or anyone else though, all that goes out the window because everyone thinks she needs constant attention.
I've also expressed how I don't want her all over my furniture. She's ripped up 3+ couch cushions, peed all over the furniture, scrates and bites everything. And frankly, because of the lack of boundaries she has at his house she is getting very demanding and doesnt listen. I currently have been bags while I look for a couch and don't want the filling everywhere, or for her to ingest any.
She's chewed up a few of my things, expensive items too.
Side note: I am catsitting for my cousin. Her cat is pretty aggressive (I love cats but he's a mean lil dude) and has never been around dogs so I put him in my 2nd room, and her in my livingroom with a baby gate.
So, I got tired of sleeping on the airmatress and decided to sleep on the beanbags for the night. He let her all over the bean bags, eventhough he knows how I feel. I've talked about how I'm considering getting 2 couches, one that I want for my house, and another less expensive one so she and any animals I get in the future can have a chill out spot and there's not 27383939 dog and cat beds all over.
I'm trying to be flexible and work with him but it seems like he just disregards everything in favor of not hurting her feelings.
I'm not saying ignore or neglect the dog, I've tried to get him to get puzzle feeders and other enrichment toys for her, or even sent him videos on diy enrichment activities. I talk about different training exercises that'll work her brain out while also teaching her how to and how not to behave. I suggest taking her on walks more than he does. I send him info about nutrition and how to keep her healthy, what toys not to buy, etc. It feels like I'm doing all the heavy lifting.
And in addition, it's gotten to the point that whenever I want to go do something together as a couple, he says we can't because he has to be at home with the dog. Because his dad says he doesn't spend enough time with the dog. Or he doesn't wanna leave her alone for more than an hour or two. Its always some excuse evolving her.
It's been months and I just don't know what to do anymore.

The original British man of mystery, James Bond was first brought to life on the screen by Sean Connery. Dressed to the nines in a tuxedo and armed with a number of concealed gadgets, Bond was sent across the world to stop high scale crimes. His quick wit and commendable physicality has saved the world a half dozen times over.
This Bond, being the traditional mid-century spy, uses many tricks to get a leg up over the enemy. He’s a very clever, wily agent, although he’s not above just brute forcing his problems with great strength. His Q Branch equipment is disguised as everyday items, so he’s used to being prepared when infiltrating an organization.
The films included in this thread are Dr. No, From Russia with Love, Goldfinger, Thunderball, You Only Live Twice, and Diamonds are Forever. Hover over a feat to see which film it’s from.

Physicals

Strength

• Resists the force of rushing water inside a pipe
• Flips a table with two men on top of it into the water
• Avoids an assassin’s poisoned kicks by pinning her to a wall with a chair
• Holds himself up on the ceiling and drops on a guard when he walks into Bond’s cell
• When his sleeve is pinned to a large wooden cabinet, he pulls the cabinet down
• Picks up and throws a chair at a man, knocking him out
• Fights off an attacker with a damn couch
• Breaks a wooden board with a downward strike
• Throws a man around, sending him through two Japanese screen walls
• When he’s held underwater by two women, Bond surfaces and holds both of them underwater with one hand each

Endurance

• Resists being garroted long enough to grab a knife, stabbing his attacker and turning the garrote wire back on him
• [Limit] Knocked out by a pistol whip to the back of the head
• Keeps fighting after getting a wooden chair broken over his back
• OK after being dropped on his face into a vent
• Stays conscious after strikes from Oddjob
  • Oddjob RT
• Keeps fighting through a vase to the head
• Fights on through hits with a fireplace poker
• Keeps swimming despite grenades being detonated around him
• Keeps running despite being shot in the calf
  • He’s later seen patching up his calf in the bathroom, so he was definitely hit by a bullet
• Breaks free of a rear hold after being punched in the face twice
• Takes a beating from two acrobats, Bambi and Thumper
• [Limit] Knocked out by an urn to the back of the neck

Agility

• Dodges Oddjob’s hat
• While on the ground, he dodges katana swings
• Chases down an assassin, tackling him
• Performs a front flip off a ledge
• Rolls and pulls a lever to incapacitate a gunman with a machine
• Traverses the underside of an oil rig by swinging on a rope, then walking a tightrope

Skill

Combat
Unarmed

• Catches a kick, then throws the attacker back
• Judo flips an attacker, then punches him
• Breaks a hold from behind by a man who wrestles alligators
• Brawls with Dr. No before leaving him to die in the radioactive waters
• Punches out a man in a hazmat suit in one blow
• Commandeers a speedboat, throwing the two men off of it
• Dispatches a guard with a neck strike
• Fights evenly with Grant in a train car, with both men getting in hits before Grant begins garroting Bond with a concealed wire
  • Grant is a trained Russian assassin who no-sells strikes to the stomach with brass knuckles
• Sweeps Pussy Galore to the floor, then reverses her judo throw attempt
• Sneaks up on a guard, then sweeps the leg to knock him out
• Silently KOs a man, then steals his equipment to blend in with a scuba crew
• Knocks out six men when fleeing on a rooftop
• Starts thrashing technicians until one pulls a gun
• Wrestles with Hans before flipping him into a piranha pond
• Wrestles a man in a crowded elevator, using the windows and door as weapons
• Kicks a man off of his vehicle and steals it
• Smacks a dame

With Weapons/Environment

• Stealthily kills a man in a river with a knife
• Closes a truck’s hood on a man’s hand, then punches him out
• Brawls with an assassin in a hotel room before throwing him into a bathtub and knocking a fan into the water, electrocuting him
• Runs up on a guard and slams his head into a car, knocking him out
• Kills Oddjob by using exposed electrical wiring on a metal cage that Oddjob was touching
• Breaks a man’s neck with a fireplace poker
• Pulls a would-be assassin through a window
• Identifies an assassin hiding in the shower, then takes him out with the shower and a nearby door
• Kicks a man’s alcohol bottle, then ignites the contents with a woman’s lighter, allowing him to escape the car
• While diving, Bond wrestles with another diver before cutting his breathing device
• Disarms a diver, then uses the harpoon gun to shatter their goggles
• Defeats three men in the confined space of a ship’s cockpit
• Kills a man with his own knife in one maneuver
• Disarms a man of a spear and stabs him fatally
• Tears off a woman’s bikini top and chokes her with it
• Sprays a man with a fire extinguisher, then strikes him off a ledge with it
• Throws flammable alcohol onto an assassin, lighting him on fire
• While being choked from behind, Bond throws the attacker off of himself, then ties a time bomb to his coat and throws him off a boat

Gunfighting

• Shoots a gunman atop a bridge
• Using a sniper rifle, Bond shoots a man in a helicopter, causing him to drop his grenade inside
• Using a flare gun, Bond fires on floating oil drums, causing an explosion to consume enemy boats
• Grabs Goldfinger’s gun and fires on an airplane window, sucking the villain out of the plane
• Efficient in skeet shooting
• Turns and immediately shoots a harpoon, killing a stealthy assassin
• Shoots a gunman despite their being behind a column for cover
• Shoots three pursuing men
• Right after waking up, he shoots a ninja in the dark
• Outshoots a man in a hallway

Traditional Spy Skills

• [Stealth] Knowing that a man is coming to kill him, Bond waits behind a door, then holds the attempted killer at gunpoint
• [Stealth] Uses a hollow reed to hide underwater from guards and dogs
• [Deception] Tricks Grant into opening a rigged case, which disperses tear gas in his face
• [Sleight of Hand] Slips a tracking device and a note into a gangster’s coat pocket
• [Disguise] Steals an assassin’s clothing, pretends to be the assassin and is personally carried back to the villain’s headquarters
• [Stealth] Hides in plain sight by pretending to be making out, but it’s actually just his own arms wrapped around himself
• [Stealth] Sneaks into the back of a van while his partner distracts the driver
• [Identification] Identifies an assassin he’s never seen before by the scent of their aftershave

Driving

• Loses a pursuing driver by driving under an obstacle
• Weaves around a parking lot, causing a dozen cop cars to crash into themselves, walls or parked cars
• Briefly drives on two wheels to slip through a narrow alley

Other

• [Observation] Notices an attacker in the reflection of a woman’s eye, then uses her as a human shield to block a strike
• [Observation] Notices shadows under a door while snooping, allowing him to hide
• [Human Shield] Uses his dancing partner as a human shield when he notices a concealed gunman’s pistol
• [Foreign Language] Learned several Asian languages at Cambridge
• [Alcoholism] Can tell the temperature of alcohol after one sip
• [Accuracy] Throws three scalpels into a man’s arm and chest
• [Diving] Dives off an oil rig into the ocean below

Equipment

Weapons

• Carries a Walther PPK, a discreet pistol with excellent stopping power
• A collapsible Armalite AR-7 sniper rifle with an infrared sight, allowing for use in the dark
• A knife, kept in his boot
• A grenade, for use underwater
• A projectile launcher disguised as a cigarette, gifted to Bond by a ninja master
  • Used to kill a technician while disarmed of all other weapons
• Once carried a throwing star, a gift from a ninja organization

Gadgets
Reconnaissance/Detection

• Has a small sensor to detect a listening device on the telephone
• A recorder disguised as a camera, with audio sent automatically to MI6
• A waterproof geiger counter in his watch
• A waterproof camera with infrared compatibility

Mobility

• Grapnel gun, used to quickly scale a wall and take out the guard on the other side
• A grappling gun and cord that attaches to his pants, allowing him to scale the outside of a skyscraper
  • Can be outfitted with metal projectiles and used as a firearm instead
• Parachutes near an oil rig in an inflatable sphere that floats on the surface of water
• A scuba tank with a forward-facing projectile launcher
  • Used to hit a piece of sunken ship, causing it to land on two diving enemies
• Briefly wore a ninja outfit with suction cups on the palms and knees, used to scale down metal walls
• Flies away from a fight with a jetpack

Accessories

• A gas mask
• Scuba gear with a head attachment, meant to make Bond look like a harmless water fowl
• A pocket rebreather that works for about four minutes
  • Uses the rebreather to escape from a shark-infested pool
• Carries what is effectively a mousetrap in his jacket, so that when a guard reaches in to take his gun, he gets his fingers trapped
• Uses a fake fingerprint to assume another man’s identity

Transmitters

• Two small transmitters, the larger of which is magnetic
• Can detect his transmitters on the DB5’s radar
• Smaller transmitter can be placed in Bond’s shoe if he needs to call for backup or rescue

Other

• A leather case with numerous hidden components, like ammunition holders, throwing knives, a folding sniper rifle and 50 gold coins
  • Comes with canister of tear gas disguised as a can of talcum powder that can be rigged to explode unless it’s opened a specific way
• A long tube of plastic explosive and a detonator
• A small device to aid in safe cracking
• A small explosive, used to blow a lock off a cell door

Vehicles
Aston Martin DB5

• A modified Aston Martin DB5 with bulletproof windows and revolving license plate
• Also has defenses mechanism controls in the center console and ejector seat
  • A spinning blade on the wheels, used to carve up an adjacent car’s tires
  • Smokescreen
  • Oil slick
  • Ejector seat used to dispatch a gunman in the passenger seat
• Dual water cannons on the rear of the car

”Little Nellie”

• A helicopter that can be quickly constructed by four workers
• Dual machine guns and dual heat-seeking rocket launchers
• Backwards facing flamethrowers
• Can drop miniature bombs directly beneath the helicopter
  • In a dogfight, Bond uses all of the helicopter’s armaments to destroy five enemy helicopters

Miscellaneous

• Puts powder on his bag and a strand of hair on a closet door to detect if intruders were in his room
• If a woman is distracting him, he swats her away like a fly
• He only has sex for King and Country, it gives him no pleasure, he swears
• Once faked his death and burial at sea to go undercover
• Gets a disguise to look like “a Japanese”
  • Here’s the final product. This looks just like a Japanese guy, right?
• Uses an escape pod as an wrecking ball to destroy the computers that operate a laser satellite

I admire your luck, Mr...?
Bond. James Bond.

Special Agent 007, James Bond is the star agent of MI6. Always cool under pressure and licensed to kill, James is sent to infiltrate enemy organizations and destroy them from the inside. Over the decades, James Bond has gone from serious to campy and back again, but always manages to get the job done through wit, physical ability and superior equipment.
Bond generally wields a sidearm with lethal efficiency, along with a number of incredible gadgets developed by the geniuses at Q Branch. With his remarkable physical ability and ever-changing bag of tools, there isn't an international crime organization that Bond has failed to take down. The only thing that could possible distract Bond are his own vices: women or booze, both of which have gotten one over on him in the past.
James Bond Respect Threads by Actor
Sean Connery- 1962 to 1967, once more in 1971. Physically strong, numerous gadgets disguised as everyday items. Adept in traditional spy skills, like infiltration and observation.
George Lazenby- Once in 1969. Very similar to Connery in his craftiness, skilled specifically in winter sports.
Roger Moore- 1973 to 1985. Downright campy, making use of almost cartoonish skills that actually work in-universe. Skilled driver and pilot with a variety of gadgets.
Timothy Dalton- 1987 to 1989. Colder and more quick to become violent than the others. Usually carries a firearm and a lethal gadget to kill enemies.
Pierce Brosnan- 1995 to 2002. Best variety of gadgets of any Bond. Great feats of endurance and athletic ability.
Daniel Craig- 2006 to 2021. The most realistic Bond, yet has some of the most impressive physical abilities in any of the movies. Low variety of gadgets, but excels in gunfights.
Hover over a feat to see the film it’s from. Additionally, the name of any gif on Gfycat contains the last name of the actor that accomplished it.

Physicals

You have a nasty habit of surviving.
Well, you know what they say about the fittest.

Strength
Striking

• Breaks a wooden board with a downward strike
• Tackles a man through two bathroom stalls
• Barrels through a temporary construction wall
• Punches through drywall and wood to access a hidden room

Lifting/Throwing

• Picks up and throws a chair at a man, knocking him out
• Fights off an attacker with a couch
• Picks up and slides a man across a table
• Tosses a chain onto a low-flying helicopter to cause it to crash
• Holds a man above a ledge by the hair

Grip

• When he’s held underwater by two women, Bond surfaces and holds both of them underwater with one hand each
• Holds onto a small plane while the pilot tries to shake him off
• Catches a rope on a blimp and holds on even after it rises high into the air
• Holds onto the top of a speeding car, even when the driver attempts to shake him off
• Avoids falling out of a plane’s airlock by grabbing onto some netting
• Holds onto the outside of a moving seaplane, even after the pilot attempts to shake him off
• Holds onto the bottom of an elevator car as it rises up a skyscraper

Pushing

• With one other guy, Bond rolls this large concrete column
• Knocks over a large bookshelf

Other

• After being buried in snow by an avalanche, Bond climbs out and is relatively okay about a minute later
• Wrestles with a large constricting snake before killing it with a poison injector

Endurance
Blunt Force

• Keeps fighting after getting a wooden chair broken over his back
• Stays conscious after strikes from Oddjob
  • Oddjob RT
• Fights on through hits with a fireplace poker
• Jumps from a bridge to a passing boat, falling through the roof and onto a wedding cake
• While hanging onto a blimp, he’s smacked into the Golden Gate Bridge and quickly starts climbing up
• He’s knocked down a ladder, but recovers by the time he gets to the bottom rung
• Continues fighting Stamper after a number of blows to the face
• Falls from a low hot air balloon onto a domed structure, and he recovers by grabbing some nearby cables
  • Bond suffered a dislocated collarbone after this fall, however
• When jumping off a low crane, Bond stumbles, falling into a metal air vent. He’s up and running moments later.
• Recieves cock and ball torture by Le Chiffre’s rope, at first barely responding, then laughing in his torturer’s face
• Falls one or two stories onto the top of a bus, but gets up quickly
• Fights on after being hit across the back with a metal pipe four times
• Keeps fighting through repeated strikes from Hinx, like getting thrown into walls or getting thrown through thin walls
  • Mr. Hinx Respect Thread found here
• [Limit] Has a recurring weakness to blunt force trauma to the back of the head

Piercing/Cutting

• Keeps running despite being shot in the calf
  • He’s later seen patching up his calf in the bathroom, so he was definitely hit by a bullet
• Keeps fighting after being cut across the chest and being shot up by a nail gun
• Gets shot in the shoulder by a handgun, but operates mostly unimpeded

Other

• Resists being garroted long enough to grab a knife, stabbing his attacker and turning the garrote wire back on him
• Takes over 12 Gs of force before destroying the machine with an armor-piercing dart
  • Real-life astronauts are typically trained to withstand up to 9 Gs of force.
• Gets electrocuted with a gauntlet that can output 100,000 volts, which leaves him writhing in pain but conscious
  • Scene describing the electrical weapon, where the 100,000 volt figure is from
• Bond is shot by a sniper rifle and falls off a high bridge into water. After three months, Bond is mostly physically able again, although his aim is more noticeably affected.
• Endures having a small surgical drill bore into the back of his skull and into the part of the brain that deals with recognition, seemingly to no negative neurological effect

Agility
Movement

• Chases down an assassin, tackling him
• Takes a running jump up to a rising platform
• Catches up to an aircraft taking off on the runway
• Runs and jumps into a closing metal door
• Catches up to an airplane during takeoff, jumping into the plane through the landing gear
• Catches up to a fleeing truck on a runway, although it obviously hasn’t accelerated to full speed
• Escapes a CIA squad with just a moment's warning
• Runs away from a fireball caused by a house-sized explosion

Reflexes

• While on the ground, he dodges katana swings
• Dodges a thrown knife, then pulls it out of the wood behind him to kill the assassin
• Dodges a dune buggy at close range
• Evades shotgun fire from a pursuer
• Evades rifle fire, then shoots the enemy gunman
• Evades handgun fire with a roll, then avoids some distant machine gun fire
• Dodges a harpoon underwater
• When a man attempts to shoot Bond’s knees from nearly point blank range, Bond moves his legs to avoid the shots
• Uses an enemy to block gunfire
• While sitting in the passenger seat, Bond grabs the driver’s arm before they can shoot him
• Rolls away from an incendiary grenade’s detonation moments after noticing it

Combat Skill

Problem solver?
More of a problem eliminator.

Unarmed Combat
Quick Knock Outs

• Judo flips an attacker, then punches him
• Dispatches a guard with a neck strike
• Silently KOs a man, then steals his equipment to blend in with a scuba crew
• KOs a guard with a judo chop
• Stealthily KOs a guard from behind cover
• Knocks a man out with one kick to the head
• Ends an attempted fistfight with an elbow and then slamming the man on a table
• Knocks out a man by slamming him into the walls of an elevator twice
• Punches a guy out in two strikes
• Consistently one-punches goons
• From a sprint, Bond jumps and kicks a man in the face to knock him out

Against Individuals

• Breaks a hold from behind by a man who wrestles alligators
• Fights evenly with Grant in a train car, with both men getting in hits before Grant begins garroting Bond with a concealed wire
  • Grant is a trained Russian assassin who no-sells strikes to the stomach with brass knuckles
• Sweeps Pussy Galore to the floor, then reverses her judo throw attempt
• Wrestles with Hans before flipping him into a piranha pond
• Flips a man with judo throws twice
• Defeats a strong, tough guy in the hotel
• Has an awesome fistfight with a heavyset henchman, ending with Bond punching him off a rooftop
• Fights an assassin while dangling outside of a moving plane
• Has an extended fistfight with Alec Trevylyn, former agent 006, ending with Alec grabbing a handgun to hold Bond at gunpoint
• During a fight, he breaks a man’s arm, then punches him off a ledge
• Brawls with a martial artist on the outside of a crane

Against Multiple Attackers

• Knocks out six men when fleeing on a rooftop
• Starts thrashing technicians until one pulls a gun
• Defeats four guards in hand-to-hand combat
• Knocks out two attackers who ambushed him
• Drops about four men in a bar fight
• While handcuffed, Bond knocks out four surrounding MI6 agents in an elevator
• Drops two guards with one strike each

Against Armed Attackers

• Kicks away a gunman's gun, then beats him up in the ocean
• Disarms an armed woman with one hand
• While unarmed, Bond fights with a knife-wielding villain, with Bond disarming him and tackling him into water
• Disarms a woman and puts her in a painful armhold
• Disarms a gunman and knocks him down some stairs
• Has an extended fight with a man with a machete while in a confined space. Bond himself was unarmed, although he did ball up his jacket to block some strikes.
• Takes out a CIA riot officer with an elbow to the face
• While completely unarmed, defeats a man wielding an axe, even tricking him into slicing his own foot
• Brawls with an assassin armed with a sniper rifle before dropping him out of a skyscraper
• Intentionally breaks the ice on a frozen lake to bring a gunman down into the water, then Bond chokes him to death with his leg

With Weapons
Blades

• Kills a man with his own knife in one maneuver
• In just a few moves, Bond defeats a henchman in a machete fight, throwing him into a container full of snakes
• Steals a man’s knife, then pins his tie to a nearby counter
• Swordfights with a trained fencer, eventually switching to broadswords, where Bond draws first blood from the torso
• While being held at knifepoint, Bond turns and kills the man with his own knife after a struggle

Blunt Objects

• Breaks a man’s neck with a fireplace poker
• Disarms a diver, then uses the harpoon gun to shatter their goggles
• Using an oar, Bond fights off a man with a large hook
• Uses a ski to knock a man off of a cliff, then kills another man after a struggle
• While unarmed, Bond is attacked by an assassin with a knife, but manages to kill the assassin with a pair of scissors
• Spots an attacker in the reflection of a bronze decoration, then uses the decoration to bludgeon them
• Fights off four men who were beating him with a bat moments before, making heavy use of furniture and blunt items

Unorthodox Items

• Defeats three men in the confined space of a cockpit
• Throws flammable alcohol onto an assassin, igniting him
• Beats down a guard with a door, then five strikes
• Takes out two motorcycle-riding assassins with a long plank of wood
• Uses a ski pole to set a trap for a motorbike-riding assassin
• Knocks out a prison guard while handcuffed, at one point using the cuffs on the man's face
• Defeats two men in a crumbling building, using exposed wiring and a nail gun to dispatch them

Environment Focused

• Brawls with an assassin in a hotel room before throwing him into a bathtub and knocking a fan into the water, electrocuting him
• Kills Oddjob by using exposed electrical wiring on a metal cage that Oddjob was touching
• Tricks Jaws into hitting a wood column, knocking a wooden structure over himself
• Brawls with Jaws atop a cable car
• Fights off three hockey player assassins in a hockey rink, taking one out with the zamboni
• Judo throws a goon onto a bed of spikes
• While pinned to a wooden door by knives, he opens the door and kills an assassin with one of the knives
• Smacks a henchman with a plane’s antenna, throwing him off the plane
• Tosses maggots at a gunman, then knocks him out and judo throws him into the maggots
• Bond drags a guard into water and drowns him
• Bond ties a rope around Mr. Hinx’s neck and attaches it to a weight, then kicks that weight off the train to pull Hinx away

Accuracy

You wouldn’t kill me. You’d miss me.
I never miss.

Pistols

• Grabs Goldfinger’s gun and fires on an airplane window, sucking the villain out of the plane
• Shoots a gunman despite their being behind a column for cover
• Right after waking up, he shoots a ninja in the dark
• Poses as a wax figure and shoots Scaramanga
• Shoots three soldiers with his Walther P5, two of them being headshots
• Accurately hits a gunman from a moving speedboat
• Shoots a gunman through a wooden floor
• Uses a human shield to block bullets, then returns fire, killing a gunman
• Turns and fires on a man before he can fire
• Shoots a man while hanging upside-down by the leg
• Disarms and shoots two policemen
• Disarms the man holding him at gunpoint, then kills four other armed men in seconds
• Shoots two fire extinguishers to obscure the room and allow hostages to safely escape
• While handcuffed and at gunpoint, Bond steals the gun to shoot his captors

Against Vehicles

• Uses the Walther PPK to shoot out a dune buggy’s front tire
• Fires a Taurus PT92 into the engine of an oncoming Jeep, disabling it
• From a speedboat, Bond accurately hits a helicopter’s engine enough with a handgun to cause it to crash

Rifles/Submachine Guns

• Using a sniper rifle, Bond shoots a man in a helicopter, causing him to drop his grenade inside
• Fires a rifle, killing three goons, while sliding down a bannister
• Kills at least 8 men with a submachine gun in a short timeframe
• Turns around and shoots a gunman before he can kill his hostage. Note that Bond turns and fires right after the gunman receives orders to kill the hostage.
• Spots a sneaking soldier dressed in black and kills him with a rifle
• Fires on a guard before the guard can fire his weapon
• From a speeding hovercraft, Bond hits small land mines to detonate them on his pursuers
• Uses a Sa vz. 58 Compact to escape Blofeld’s facility, killing nearly a dozen guards, even at extreme range

Other Firearms

• Turns and immediately shoots a harpoon gun, killing a stealthy assassin
• Takes out a distant sniper by firing a shotgun
• Accurately shoots a sniper’s rifle with his own, rather than kill her
• Escapes a crowd of divers by stealing a harpoon gun and firing it into a nearby seaplane, pulling himself away

Non-Firearm Accuracy

• Throws three scalpels into a man’s arm and chest
• Throws a knife into a specific date on a calendar from across a room
• When the auto-targeting system fails, Bond manually shoots down a capsule full of viruses with a laser cannon
• Kills a man with a climbing spike

Other Skills

I always enjoyed learning a new tongue.
You always were a cunning linguist, James.

Athletics

• Dives off an oil rig into the ocean below
• Avoids machine gun fire while skiing
• Continues skiing after losing a ski
• While skiing, Bond jumps and twists to smack two gunmen with his skis
• Goes rock climbing on a nearly vertical rock wall
• Temporarily outswims the pull of an industrial fan before destroying it with his air tank
• Performs a HALO jump into water, then immediately begins scuba diving
• Swims outside of a submarine, scaling the surface until he can re-enter the vessel on the other side. He had to hold his breath for almost two minutes while scaling the outside of the submarine.
• Infiltrates North Korea by simply surfing onto the coast of the country
• Parasurfs off a collapsing iceberg
• Leaps from a crashing plane, catching up to his partner and using her parachute to save them both

Driving/Piloting
Driving

• Weaves around a parking lot, causing a dozen cop cars to crash into themselves, walls or parked cars
• Briefly drives on two wheels to slip through a narrow alley
• Drifts a double decker bus, causing a couple cops to crash their motorcycles
• Jumps over a river in a car using a broken bridge as a ramp
• While driving, he knocks over barrels onto enemies, then drives on two wheels to block bullets
• Drives a car over a ramp, onto a bus, then back to ground level

Piloting Aircraft

• Picks up a villain's wheelchair with a helicopter, then drops him into a smokestack
• Avoids a heat-seeking missile while piloting a small plane, redirecting it into an enemy hangar
• Dodges a stinger missile by driving a semi-truck on only the left hand wheels
• Starts a helicopter in midair and lands safely
• While flying a much less maneuverable plane, Bond tricks a fighter jet into crashing into a mountainside by producing smoke from a damaged engine
• Ejects a pilot from a helicopter, then pulls the helicopter out of freefall

Other

• Jumps a speedboat over a small patch of land
• Drifts a tank, then drives through a building to cause untold property damage

Traversal

• Performs a front flip off a ledge
• Traverses a ski lift wire with nothing more than a pair of mittens
• Traverses the underside of an oil rig by swinging on a rope, then walking a tightrope
• Jumps on the back of a couple alligators to escape a swamp
• Swings on vines like Tarzan to escape pursuers
• Traverses the side of a moving train
• Uses a long pole to safely travel down a building, then releases the pole to smack a pursuing officer
• Performs a combat roll down stairs to avoid handgun fire
• Runs up a crane to reach the top of a building under construction
• Climbs up a vertical I-beam
• From the top of a moving truck, Bond runs and flips through the open windshield
• Jumps down a story onto stone, rolling to avoid impact damage

Stealth

• Uses a hollow reed to hide underwater from guards and dogs
• Hides in plain sight by pretending to be making out, but it’s actually just his own arms wrapped around himself
• Evades a crowd of police
• Lowers his heart rate to trick medical staff and an EKG, then dispatches the staff and escapes the hospital
• Broke into M’s house to use her computer

Other

• [Observation] Notices an attacker in the reflection of a woman’s eye, then uses her as a human shield to block a strike
• [Foreign Language] Learned several Asian languages at Cambridge
• [Alcoholism] Can tell the temperature of alcohol after one sip
• [Deception] Poses as a genealogist under the pseudonym Sir Hillary Bray. After a few days, Blofeld sees through the ruse and has Bond captured.
• [Underwater] Ties a boat to a large rock with the rope he’s bound in, causing the boat to break the rope, freeing Bond
• [Sleight of Hand] Switches out a priceless Faberge egg for a fake copy
• [Animal Commanding] Commands a wild tiger to sit, and it actually listens
• [Gambling] Wins a quarter of a million dollars at a high stakes gambling table
• [Invention] Descends a tall building with some rope and an unconscious body
• [Seduction] Seduces a married woman to learn more about her husband’s criminal activity
• [Preparation] Puts shotgun shells under the floorboards in order to fire on intruders when they step on them
• [Observation] Identifies a hidden door based on a tiny sliver of light through the crack

Equipment

Right, now pay attention 007. I want you to take great care of this equipment. There are one or two rather special accessories.
Q, have I ever let you down?
Frequently.

Weapons
Firearms

• Carries a Walther PPK, a discreet pistol with excellent stopping power
• A collapsible Armalite AR-7 sniper rifle with an infrared sight, allowing for use in the dark
• Bond carries a S&W model 29 revolver in early Moore films, then later switches to his iconic Walther PPK, then, finally, uses the Walther P5
• Carries a very small firearm, the Beretta 950 Jetfire
• Has a firearm disguised as a camera. Additionally, the device is programmed to Bond’s own palm signature, meaning only he can fire the weapon.
  • The camera gun can be outfitted with a scope and tripod for long range fire
• A suppressed UMP-9, used to fire on Mr. White’s leg at range
• A Walther PPK with a palm-print sensor coded to Bond’s hand, meaning only he can fire it
  • Sure enough, when someone else tries to use it, it just doesn’t fire
• A heavily modified Glock 17, with laser sight and microphone attachment

Other

• A combat knife
• A projectile launcher disguised as a cigarette, gifted to Bond by a ninja master
• A grenade disguised as a ballpoint pen
  • By tossing the grenade pen into a pool of fuel, an explosion and destructive fire is formed
• A grenade disguised as a lighter
• A flashbang explosive disguised as a handgun, used to stun three gunmen, allowing Bond to dispatch them

Gadgets
Mobility

• A grappling gun and cord that attaches to his pants, allowing him to scale the outside of a skyscraper
  • Can be outfitted with metal projectiles and used as a firearm instead
• Briefly wore a ninja outfit with suction cups on the palms and knees, used to scale down metal walls
• Flies away from a fight with a jetpack
• A belt with a hidden high-tensile cord, enough to support Bond’s own weight
  • Using the belt cord, Bond swings Spider-Man-style across a room and out a window

Reconnaissance/Infiltration

• A small explosive, used to blow a lock off a cell door
• Has a small safe-cracking device disguised as a cigarette case
• Special glasses to see through tinted glass
• Photocopier disguised as a checkbook
• A digital skeleton key disguised as a gift card
• Binoculars built into a pair of glasses
• Sunglasses with built in X-ray vision, allowing Bond to detect concealed weapons and see through women’s clothing
• A powerful camera, used to identify the faces of high profile criminals with just a few pixels
• A cell phone that acts as a fingerprint scanner, a powerful taser and as a remote control for a BMW

Continued in Comments

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I live off the R in Brooklyn and I feel like there's always a lot of hijinks with the R going express from Atlantic to 36th and then the D or N going local to service the stops in between. This happens elsewhere in the city too, with some local train going express and then some other train servicing the local stops. What's the deal? If they skipped some stops or didn't use a track I'd get it but I can't see any obvious effect that this has.

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Seeking ITP: West Midtown, Midtown, Inman Park, VA Highlands, Kirkwood, Edgewood, Castleberry Hill...you get the point. Possibly Buckhead depending on the situation.

Part 3
The landscape changed as Gary prowled through it. It started as the farmland he remembered so well. Small copses of trees began to appear as he moved around, hunting. Between them, individual trees began to appear. The buildings, small houses and sheds, mostly, thinned out as the trees grew thicker. The ground grew steeper and mountains rose around him.
Before long, he was prowling the slopes of a narrow wooded valley. He could see ixlets darting through the woods around him. He glanced down the slope and saw a mix of greasers and Taliban, moving through the trees.
He moved further down the valley, towards the Taliban and greasers. They ignored him, except to keep their distance. That suited Gary just fine, as he was after a different prey.
Down below the greasers, the landscape changed again. The trees thinned out and vanished, replaced by rocky, windswept tundra, dotted by small lakes. He found a ruin there, massive gray stones emerging from the ground.
He moved past the ruin. Trees appeared again, but instead of oak and ceder and ash, he found mangroves and pines and huge ceibos. They came together, getting denser and denser until he stepped out onto a large rock and could see the town of Esteli spread out before him.
He continued on, into the narrow streets. The buildings crowded together, wall to wall. There were signs everywhere; for the shops that dotted the streets, for American companies that selflessly graced the slums of Nicaragua with their business, for local brands, for strip clubs and bars.
The people crowded the streets, competing with the tiny cars and occasional donkey. Gary moved on.
The streets changed. The crowds changed, too. They had darker skin and wore less clothes. Trikes began to appear, enclosed three-wheeled ramblers built around a motorcycle frame. A sign pointed him to Clara Town in English.
This time, Gary paused. He remembered this place. Monrovia, Liberia. On the west coast of Africa. His first contract for the Agency had brought him here. The spook he was here to protect had been a stupid little shit that had ruined his own operation and gotten them into a gunfight. He'd met Drake here, as well. The younger man's bright pink hair had stood out to Gary, a massive cross-section on his gaydar.
He remembered being holed up in a run-down hovel following the fight. Everybody was injured, but nobody had died. Gary was down to two mags, one of them in his rifle and the other half-empty in a pouch on his chest. Drake had offered him a blowjob for the half-empty mag, confirming Gary's suspicions about which way he swung. Gary had handed it over without a word, but as they rode away in a beat up minivan driven by one of their assets, he'd leaned over and asked Drake to pay up, half jokingly.
Well, maybe a quarter jokingly.
That had been a bad day, but far from the worst he'd seen. And not someplace he would find the bugbear.
"Where the fuck are you, ya foggy little goblin?" Gary muttered. This place felt wrong. He remembered what Inanna had said, somewhere else.
"...They're not intelligent, though they can speak."
Gary glanced around. This place... This was not a place of fear. This was a place of a curious, entertaining memory. Frustrating, at the time, and painful as well. But not frightening. Not like those fields where he'd killed the boys.
The bugbear wasn't here, he realized. It hadn't been any of the places he'd been. Instead, it had been sending him away from it. Sending him to places where he'd hunt the thing, while it...
Gary knew where to go.
He pictured the park and began to walk.
He tried to work it out. He was in his own head. He needed to get out, to get back to the real world. He reached out with his magical senses, feeling the world around him. It felt... Delicate. As if it would fall apart at a simple touch. Experimentally, he reached out with a bit of magic. The buildings on one side of the street crumbled.
He pushed out harder, reaching out all around him, tearing the world apart with magic, until he floated in a deep void. From here, he could feel the real world. It was up. He turned his face in that direction and flew.
----
Inanna Williams, Fucking Shit Balls, Motherfucking Cock Sucker
She would not call Jerry. Or Yarm, or Sookie, or anyone else who might be awake right now. But she was getting pretty fucking disgusted with this thing. Suzanne crouched below one of the picnic tables as Inanna held her sword in her hands and kept herself between the bugbear and the girl.
Her sword blazed with fire, of course. Drawing flame from metal was one of the simplest acts of magic, an effect easily imbued into any artifact. And the weapons forged by Grandfather were works of art, pristinely forged and crafted and eager to soak up any enchantments they could. The flames were good, they helped. They weren't the problem.
Keeping magic suffused through her body was the problem.
She'd already moved around more magic today than she had in the last week. The effort had exhausted her. She barely had the strength to hoist her sword. And she was making a continuing effort to keep enough magic in her body to actually hurt the bugbear.
She didn't know how long she could keep this up.
The bugbear lunged again and she whipped her blade up, tip menacing the thing. It growled and hissed and spat, but it had already learned what pain that weapon could inflict.
Inanna glanced over to where Gary had collapsed, only to realize he was not there. His sword and shield lay on the ground, but Gary was gone. She carefully flicked her eyes from the bugbear to different areas of the park, searching for him. She saw no sign of him whatsoever. Gary had vanished.
A grin split her features.
"You are in for a world of hurt, you ugly motherfucker," she said menacingly. The bugbear ignored her, of course. It was a beast, after all.
----
Gary Johnson, Fucking Pissed
He didn't even bother with his weapons. He remembered Inanna's words, and the effect Percy's punches had on the thing. He pulled in his shield, burying it just below his skin. He poured more magic into it, thickening it, strengthening it.
He could feel the tension of the shield as he crept off into the shadows. The bugbear was menacing Inanna, who menaced it right back with her big ass sword. She looked exhausted, like she might fall over at any minute. Too much magic use, Gary thought. The rituals had each taken a toll on her, and he knew how difficult teleporting someone who wasn't touching him was.
He snuck around behind the thing as Inanna said something he didn't catch. He idly wondered why she hadn't called Jerry, but the answer presented itself before the question had even been formed. It was pride, of course. She could not bring herself to ask for assistance defeating something she'd dismissed as 'not particularly tough'.
Gary got to within tackling distance and then brought his wet blanket back up and threw it over the monster. Its blurry form solidified, the pale white face and dark body coming into focus. Its limbs were long, with long claws on each finger. Its elbows and shoulders were bulbous, its chest sunken, its hips protruding. It noticed, of course. It snarled at Inanna, but before it could strike, Gary rushed it, his temper cheering at the thought of getting his hands on the thing.
It spun at the sound of his feet pounding on the grass, so Gary swung a textbook perfect punch right between its eyes. The blow clotheslined the beast, flipping its feet forward, tossing it on its own head and neck with a sickening crack that would have killed any mortal.
Razor sharp claws lashed out at him as he threw himself on top of the thrashing monster. They scratched at the top layers of his skin, but the wounds closed and they couldn't penetrate past his shield.
He used his left hand to interfere with the claws, getting his forearm onto the bugbear's and pressing down. With his right hand, he pounded at the beast's face, over and over. Each blow crunched into the thing with the force of a freight train, the unfocused magic in his body turning itself into raw physical power.
The bugbear roared in pain and rage, so Gary opened his mouth and roared right back. The beast slipped its arms free and jammed them into Gary's sides, but he ignored them and got his left hook working the thing as well.
Snarling in rage, he snatched his knife off his chest and brought it down into the thing's throat. Its roars turned into a wet, gurgling sound. Gary pulled the knife out, then thrust it into its belly and ripping up, the force of the move shattering ribs and spraying Gary with a black ichor.
He growled deep in his chest, pulling the knife back out and slamming it into the bugbear's neck again, this time from the side. He left it there and resumed punching it, slamming his fists down with enough force to shatter the bones in his hands, leaving them just enough time to heal between blows.
He struck the beast over and over and over, ignoring the pain in his hands, focused only on hurting the thing. He kept going long after it stopped fighting back, stopping only when he felt a small hand on his back. He spun, his eyes wild and angry, but it was only Inanna there.
"You got him, Yarm," she said wryly. Gary stared, uncomprehending at her for a moment. Then it clicked. He barked a short laugh out and rolled off the thing, sitting on the grass next to the unmoving body.
"Is it dead?" he asked, his chest heaving from the exertion.
Inanna held a hand out towards the bugbear. "Yeah, it's dead."
"Good," Gary said. They sat in silence for a moment.
"The girl all right?" he asked.
Inanna nodded. "Yup." She looked over her shoulder and called out, "It's okay, hun. You can come out, now." A tiny figure moved hesitatingly towards them, stopping at the dead body of the bugbear and looking down at it.
"It's dead, darlin'," Gary said. "Nothing but a bag o ectoplasm, or whatever that black stuff is."
"Ectoplasm," the girl said quietly. Gary nodded and looked back at Inanna.
"Did you just call me Yarm?" he asked. She chuckled. "You reminded me of him just then. You were fighting like him."
"Heh," Gary said. "Balls to the wall, unchecked aggression."
"Yup," Inanna agreed.
"Don't tell nobody, but I gave a bit of thought to dropping trou and squeezing out a stink pickle on the thing's face. Just for a second, mind."
Inanna laughed. "Why didn't you?" she asked. Gary shrugged. "No point. It's long past caring what I do to it."
"Now there's the Gary I know," she said. Then she looked at Suzanne and frowned. "The Washingtons are dead. She's got nowhere to go."
"I might have a lead on that," Gary said. "In the meantime, she can come stay with me."
Inanna scoffed. "You'll adopt her within a month," she said. Gary just shrugged. "Maybe. Like I said, I got a lead."
----
Liam MacReady, On His Day Off
Liam answered the door to reveal an older guy standing there. He had a big, bushy beard that was mostly gray, a leathery face, and a figure that suggested a lot of time in the gym. He had a veteran's air about him, too, Liam noticed. It was in the the insouciant sloop of his shoulders, the stiffness of his lower back, the way he stood with his hands on his hips.
"Can I help you?" he rumbled.
"Liam MacReady?" the man asked, his voice tinged with a backwoods twang. Liam nodded, so the man held out a leather mitt. "My name's Gary Johnson. I'm with the Divine Crisis Management Group. I have some records here that say you applied to become a foster parent about two years ago, is that right?"
Liam frowned even as he shook the man's hand. He had a firm grip, but he didn't try to crush Liam's hand. Which was good, because Liam had mastered that particular show of dominance long ago.
Still, he didn't like this. "Why you looking into me, bro?" he asked.
"There's a little girl, goes by the name of Suzanne," Johnson said. Liam's hard look evaporated at the mention of the little girl he'd tried to take in.
"I know that look," Johnson said in a softer voice. "I got a daughter of my own. Can I come in?"
Liam thought about it. A cop would ask him to step out, not ask to come in. Unless he wanted to search for something. But Liam could kick him out if he started poking around. He pushed the door open wider and stood to the side.
Johnson walked in. He didn't poke around, but went straight to the living room and waited for Liam to join him. Liam closed the door and walked into the room, taking his favorite chair and gesturing at the couch for Johnson to sit. He did.
"So what's this about Suzanne?" Liam asked.
"Can you tell me how you know her?" Johnson asked.
Liam threw up his hands. "Brother, can we just get to the point?"
"This is the point, Mister MacReady," Johnson said. "I need to ask you some questions about her."
"When'd you serve?" Liam asked.
"Eighty-seven to oh-seven," Johnson answered without hesitation. "You?"
"Oh three to twenty-ten," Liam answered. "Second Ranger Battalion."
"Fifth Group," Johnson said. Liam quirked an eyebrow. "Green berets. Choice gig, that."
"Kinda sucked, to be honest." Lian chuckled at his answer.
"So how did you meet Suzanne?"
Liam rubbed his chin, thinking. After organizing his thoughts a bit, he spoke.
"Dated a girl a couple years ago. Suzanne's mom. She was a train wreck, but it took me a while to realize it. The girl..." Liam chuckled again.
"She was scared of me at first. I got these burns," he gestured to the side of his face, "In Kandahar. Don't do a lot to make me pretty, you know? But she warmed up to me in time. Sweetest little thing, she was. I never really thought of myself as a parent, you know? Always had too much going on, what with work and the club. But I loved spending time with that girl.
"I'd have dumped her mom's druggie ass much sooner, if not for her. When I finally had enough of her shit, I called CPH. Left an anonymous tip. I put in my application to be a foster parent, knowing that they'd rather her go with someone she knows. But they denied me. The club, me being single... I guess I can't blame them."
Johnson had been carefully watching Liam's face as he spoke, and Liam felt a strange sensation in the air. The temperature had dropped, and the hairs on the back of his neck were standing up.
"You gotta good heart, Mister MacReady," Johnson said.
"Uh, thanks, I guess," Liam responded. Johnson pointed at Liam's kutte. "What's the missing rocker?" he asked.
Liam looked down, noticing the threads still hanging out. "Master-at-arms," he said, touching it with one blunt finger. "I stepped down back when I was trying to become a foster parent. Freed up more of my time, you know?"
"Would you like to see Suzanne? Spend the afternoon with her?"
Liam leaned forward, his interest thoroughly captured. "Yeah. You can make that happen?"
Johnson raised a finger. A few seconds later, Liam heard a knock on the front door. He stood and walked out there, to find a bookish-looking man in a suit and bowtie standing there. He was flanked by two more figures. One was a short, brunette knockout. She had a middle-eastern cast about her, curves like a scenic railroad track and tits that could stop all conversations within a dozen yards. But she wasn't the one who caught his eye.
"Mister Liam?" Suzanne asked. Liam's face lit up in a wide grin as he knelt down and threw his arms out.
"Hey punkin!" he cried as she rushed into them. He hugged her carefully for a long moment.
"Mister MacReady," the nerdy guy said. "I know about the troubles you had applying to become a foster parent. There's nothing we can really do about that, it's a state matter. But we have lawyers in all specialties, including family law. I'm confident we can arrange a private adoption. We've already contacted her mother at the MCI women's facility, and she's agreed to relinquish custody."
Liam stood, still clinging to Suzanne, who gripped him tightly.
"Why?" he asked.
"We want her to be with someone who loves her. And Gary is quite sure that's you."
"Uh..." Liam wasn't good with this kind of stuff. "Yeah," he said. "Yeah, that's me." Johnson stepped past him and all three of them stepped off the stoop.
"I'll be back around nine," Johnson said. He handed Liam a pair of cards, which he took and carefully examined over Suzanne's shoulder. Both were for the same company he'd mentioned earlier. One had his name on it, and the other had a woman's name.
"Call the woman, Astrid, when you're ready to move forward on the adoption," Johnson said.
"And the other?" Liam asked.
"Call me if you ever find yourself willing to give up the outlaw life and work a steady, good paying job," Johnson told him. He met Liam's eyes and then nodded.
"I missed you so much," Suzanne said as Johnson followed the other two out to a black Humvee parked by the curb. Liam grinned so wide his face hurt.
"I missed you too, punkin," he said.
The End.