NARRATOR: (Black screen with text; The sound of buzzing bees can be heard) According to all known laws of aviation, : there is no way a bee should be able to fly. : Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. : The bee, of course, flies anyway : because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. BARRY BENSON: (Barry is picking out a shirt) Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. : Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. JANET BENSON: Barry! Breakfast is ready! BARRY: Coming! : Hang on a second. (Barry uses his antenna like a phone) : Hello? ADAM FLAYMAN:
(Through phone) - Barry? BARRY: - Adam? ADAM: - Can you believe this is happening? BARRY: - I can't. I'll pick you up. (Barry flies down the stairs) : MARTIN BENSON: Looking sharp. JANET: Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. BARRY: Sorry. I'm excited. MARTIN: Here's the graduate. We're very proud of you, son. : A perfect report card, all B's. JANET: Very proud. (Rubs Barry's hair) BARRY= Ma! I got a thing going here. JANET: - You got lint on your fuzz. BARRY: - Ow! That's me!
JANET: - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. - Bye! (Barry flies out the door) JANET: Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! (Barry drives through the hive,and is waved at by Adam who is reading a newspaper) BARRY== - Hey, Adam. ADAM: - Hey, Barry. (Adam gets in Barry's car) : - Is that fuzz gel? BARRY: - A little. Special day, graduation. ADAM: Never thought I'd make it. (Barry pulls away from the house and continues driving) BARRY: Three days grade school, three days high school... ADAM: Those were awkward. BARRY: Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the hive. ADAM== You did come back different. (Barry and Adam pass by Artie, who is jogging) ARTIE: - Hi, Barry!
BARRY: - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. ADAM: - Hear about Frankie? BARRY: - Yeah. ADAM== - You going to the funeral? BARRY: - No, I'm not going to his funeral. : Everybody knows, sting someone, you die. : Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. ADAM: I guess he could have just gotten out of the way. (The car does a barrel roll on the loop-shaped bridge and lands on the highway) : I love this incorporating an amusement park into our regular day. BARRY: I guess that's why they say we don't need vacations. (Barry parallel parks the car and together they fly over the graduating students) Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. (Barry and Adam sit down and put on their hats) : - Well, Adam, today we are men.
ADAM: - We are! BARRY= - Bee-men. =ADAM= - Amen! BARRY AND ADAM: Hallelujah! (Barry and Adam both have a happy spasm) ANNOUNCER: Students, faculty, distinguished bees, : please welcome Dean Buzzwell. DEAN BUZZWELL: Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... : ...9: : That concludes our ceremonies. : And begins your career at Honex Industries! ADAM: Will we pick our job today? (Adam and Barry get into a tour bus) BARRY= I heard it's just orientation. (Tour buses rise out of the ground and the students are automatically loaded into the buses) TOUR GUIDE: Heads up! Here we go.
ANNOUNCER: Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. BARRY: - Wonder what it'll be like? ADAM: - A little scary. TOUR GUIDE== Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco : and a part of the Hexagon Group. Barry: This is it! BARRY AND ADAM: Wow. BARRY: Wow. (The bus drives down a road an on either side are the Bee's massive complicated Honey-making machines) TOUR GUIDE: We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life : to get to the point where you can work for your whole life. : Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the nectar to the hive. : Our top-secret formula : is automatically color-corrected,
scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured : into this soothing sweet syrup : with its distinctive golden glow you know as... EVERYONE ON BUS: Honey! (The guide has been collecting honey into a bottle and she throws it into the crowd on the bus and it is caught by a girl in the back) ADAM: - That girl was hot. BARRY: - She's my cousin! ADAM== - She is? BARRY: - Yes, we're all cousins. ADAM: - Right. You're right. TOUR GUIDE: - At Honex, we constantly strive : to improve every aspect of bee existence. : These bees are stress-testing a new helmet technology. (The bus passes by a Bee wearing a helmet who is being smashed into the ground with fly-swatters, newspapers and boots. He lifts a thumbs up but you can hear him groan) : ADAM==

• What do you think he makes? BARRY:
• Not enough. TOUR GUIDE: Here we have our latest advancement, the Krelman. (They pass by a turning wheel with Bees standing on pegs, who are each wearing a finger-shaped hat) Barry:
• Wow, What does that do? TOUR GUIDE:
• Catches that little strand of honey : that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. ADAM: (Intrigued) Can anyone work on the Krelman? TOUR GUIDE: Of course. Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. : But choose carefully : because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. (Everyone claps except for Barry) BARRY: The same job the rest of your life? I didn't know that. ADAM:

What's the difference? TOUR GUIDE: You'll be happy to know that bees, as a species, haven't had one day off : in 27 million years. BARRY: (Upset) So you'll just work us to death? : We'll sure try. (Everyone on the bus laughs except Barry. Barry and Adam are walking back home together) ADAM: Wow! That blew my mind! BARRY: "What's the difference?" How can you say that? : One job forever? That's an insane choice to have to make. ADAM: I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. BARRY: But, Adam, how could they never have told us that? ADAM: Why would you question anything? We're bees. : We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth.
BARRY: You ever think maybe things work a little too well here? ADAM: Like what? Give me one example. (Barry and Adam stop walking and it is revealed to the audience that hundreds of cars are speeding by and narrowly missing them in perfect unison) BARRY: I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about. ANNOUNCER: Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. BARRY: Wait a second. Check it out. (The Pollen jocks fly in, circle around and landing in line) : - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks! ADAM: - Wow. : I've never seen them this close. BARRY: They know what it's like outside the hive. ADAM: Yeah, but some don't come back. GIRL BEES: - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! (The Pollen Jocks hook up their backpacks to machines that pump the nectar to trucks, which drive away)
LOU LO DUVA: You guys did great! : You're monsters! You're sky freaks! I love it! (Punching the Pollen Jocks in joy) I love it! ADAM: - I wonder where they were. BARRY: - I don't know. : Their day's not planned. : Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. : You can't just decide to be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. ADAM== Right. (Barry and Adam are covered in some pollen that floated off of the Pollen Jocks) BARRY: Look at that. That's more pollen than you and I will see in a lifetime. ADAM: It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. BARRY: Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it and the ladies see you wearing it. (Barry waves at 2 girls standing a little away from them)
ADAM== Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? BARRY: Distant. Distant. POLLEN JOCK #1: Look at these two. POLLEN JOCK #2: - Couple of Hive Harrys. POLLEN JOCK #1: - Let's have fun with them. GIRL BEE #1: It must be dangerous being a Pollen Jock. BARRY: Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! : He had a paw on my throat, and with the other, he was slapping me! (Slaps Adam with his hand to represent his scenario) GIRL BEE #2: - Oh, my! BARRY: - I never thought I'd knock him out. GIRL BEE #1: (Looking at Adam) What were you doing during this? ADAM: Obviously I was trying to alert the authorities. BARRY: I can autograph that.
(The pollen jocks walk up to Barry and Adam, they pretend that Barry and Adam really are pollen jocks.) POLLEN JOCK #1: A little gusty out there today, wasn't it, comrades? BARRY: Yeah. Gusty. POLLEN JOCK #1: We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. BARRY: - Six miles, huh? ADAM: - Barry! POLLEN JOCK #2: A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. BARRY: - Maybe I am. ADAM: - You are not! POLLEN JOCK #1: We're going 0900 at J-Gate. : What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? BARRY: I might be. It all depends on what 0900 means. (The scene cuts to Barry looking out on the hive-city from his balcony at night) MARTIN:
Hey, Honex! BARRY: Dad, you surprised me. MARTIN: You decide what you're interested in? BARRY: - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. : Do you ever get bored doing the same job every day? MARTIN: Son, let me tell you about stirring. : You grab that stick, and you just move it around, and you stir it around. : You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. BARRY: You know, Dad, the more I think about it, : maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. MARTIN: You were thinking of what, making balloon animals? : That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. :
Janet, your son's not sure he wants to go into honey! JANET: - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. BARRY: - I'm not trying to be funny. MARTIN: You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! JANET: - You're gonna be a stirrer? BARRY: - No one's listening to me! MARTIN: Wait till you see the sticks I have. BARRY: I could say anything right now. I'm gonna get an ant tattoo! (Barry's parents don't listen to him and continue to ramble on) MARTIN: Let's open some honey and celebrate! BARRY: Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my antennae. : Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! JANET: I'm so proud. (The scene cuts to Barry and Adam waiting in line to get a job) ADAM: - We're starting work today!
BARRY: - Today's the day. ADAM: Come on! All the good jobs will be gone. BARRY: Yeah, right. JOB LISTER: Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... BEE IN FRONT OF LINE: - Is it still available? JOB LISTER: - Hang on. Two left! : One of them's yours! Congratulations! Step to the side. ADAM: - What'd you get? BEE IN FRONT OF LINE: - Picking crud out. Stellar! (He walks away) ADAM: Wow! JOB LISTER: Couple of newbies? ADAM: Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! JOB LISTER: Make your choice. (Adam and Barry look up at the job board. There are hundreds of constantly changing panels that contain available or unavailable jobs. It looks very confusing)
ADAM: - You want to go first? BARRY: - No, you go. ADAM: Oh, my. What's available? JOB LISTER: Restroom attendant's open, not for the reason you think. ADAM: - Any chance of getting the Krelman? JOB LISTER: - Sure, you're on. (Puts the Krelman finger-hat on Adam's head) (Suddenly the sign for Krelman closes out) : I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out. (Takes Adam's hat off) Wax monkey's always open. ADAM: The Krelman opened up again. : What happened? JOB LISTER: A bee died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. : Deady. Deadified. Two more dead. : Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life!
ADAM: Oh, this is so hard! (Barry remembers what the Pollen Jock offered him and he flies off) Heating, cooling, stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, : humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, : mite wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? (Adam turns around and sees Barry flying away) : Barry! POLLEN JOCK: All right, we've got the sunflower patch in quadrant nine... ADAM: (Through phone) What happened to you? Where are you? BARRY: - I'm going out. ADAM: - Out? Out where? BARRY: - Out there. ADAM: - Oh, no! BARRY: I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. ADAM:
You're gonna die! You're crazy! (Barry hangs up) Hello? POLLEN JOCK #2: Another call coming in. : If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd : that gets their roses today. BARRY: Hey, guys. POLLEN JOCK #1 == - Look at that. POLLEN JOCK #2: - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? LOU LO DUVA: Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted. POLLEN JOCK #1: It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. (Puts hand on Barry's shoulder) LOU LO DUVA: (To Barry) Really? Feeling lucky, are you? BEE WITH CLIPBOARD: (To Barry) Sign here, here. Just initial that. : - Thank you. LOU LO DUVA: - OK. : You got a rain advisory today, :
and as you all know, bees cannot fly in rain. : So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, : hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears and bats. : Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. : Murphy's in a home because of it, babbling like a cicada! BARRY: - That's awful. LOU LO DUVA: (Still talking through megaphone) - And a reminder for you rookies, : bee law number one, absolutely no talking to humans! : All right, launch positions! POLLEN JOCKS: (The Pollen Jocks run into formation) : Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! LOU LU DUVA: Black and yellow! POLLEN JOCKS:
Hello! POLLEN JOCK #1: (To Barry)You ready for this, hot shot? BARRY: Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. POLLEN JOCK's: Wind, check. : - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. : - Wings, check. - Stinger, check. BARRY: Scared out of my shorts, check. LOU LO DUVA: OK, ladies, : let's move it out! : Pound those petunias, you striped stem-suckers! : All of you, drain those flowers! (The pollen jocks fly out of the hive) BARRY: Wow! I'm out! : I can't believe I'm out! : So blue.
: I feel so fast and free! : Box kite! (Barry flies through the kite) : Wow! : Flowers! (A pollen jock puts on some high tech goggles that shows flowers similar to heat sink goggles.) POLLEN JOCK: This is Blue Leader. We have roses visual. : Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. : Roses! POLLEN JOCK #1: 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. : Stand to the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. (The pollen jock fires a high-tech gun at the flower, shooting tubes that suck up the nectar from the flower and collects it into a pouch on the gun) BARRY: That is one nectar collector! POLLEN JOCK #1== - Ever see pollination up close? BARRY: - No, sir. POLLEN JOCK #1:
(Barry and the Pollen jock fly over the field, the pollen jock sprinkles pollen as he goes) : I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, : a pinch on that one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. BARRY: That's amazing. Why do we do that? POLLEN JOCK #1: That's pollen power. More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. BARRY: Cool. POLLEN JOCK #1: I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow. could be daisies. Don't we need those? POLLEN JOCK #2: Copy that visual. : Wait. One of these flowers seems to be on the move. POLLEN JOCK #1: Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? POLLEN JOCK #2: Affirmative. (The Pollen jocks land near the "flowers" which, to the audience are obviously just tennis balls) KEN: (In the distance) That was on the line!
POLLEN JOCK #1: This is the coolest. What is it? POLLEN JOCK #2: I don't know, but I'm loving this color. : It smells good. Not like a flower, but I like it. POLLEN JOCK #1: Yeah, fuzzy. (Sticks his hand on the ball but it gets stuck) POLLEN JOCK #3== Chemical-y. (The pollen jock finally gets his hand free from the tennis ball) POLLEN JOCK #1: Careful, guys. It's a little grabby. (The pollen jocks turn around and see Barry lying his entire body on top of one of the tennis balls) POLLEN JOCK #2: My sweet lord of bees! POLLEN JOCK #3: Candy-brain, get off there! POLLEN JOCK #1: (Pointing upwards) Problem! (A human hand reaches down and grabs the tennis ball that Barry is stuck to) BARRY: - Guys! POLLEN JOCK #2: - This could be bad. POLLEN JOCK #3: Affirmative. (Vanessa Bloome starts bouncing the tennis ball, not knowing Barry is stick to it)
BARRY== Very close. : Gonna hurt. : Mama's little boy. (Barry is being hit back and forth by two humans playing tennis. He is still stuck to the ball) POLLEN JOCK #1: You are way out of position, rookie! KEN: Coming in at you like a MISSILE! (Barry flies past the pollen jocks, still stuck to the ball) BARRY: (In slow motion) Help me! POLLEN JOCK #2: I don't think these are flowers. POLLEN JOCK #3: - Should we tell him? POLLEN JOCK #1: - I think he knows. BARRY: What is this?! KEN: Match point! : You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to EAT IT! (A pollen jock coughs which confused Ken and he hits the ball the wrong way with Barry stuck to it and it goes flying into the city) BARRY:
Yowser! (Barry bounces around town and gets stuck in the engine of a car. He flies into the air conditioner and sees a bug that was frozen in there) BARRY: Ew, gross. (The man driving the car turns on the air conditioner which blows Barry into the car) GIRL IN CAR: There's a bee in the car! : - Do something! DAD DRIVING CAR: - I'm driving! BABY GIRL: (Waving at Barry) - Hi, bee. (Barry smiles and waves at the baby girl) GUY IN BACK OF CAR: - He's back here! : He's going to sting me! GIRL IN CAR: Nobody move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! (Barry freezes as well, hovering in the middle of the car) : GRANDMA IN CAR== He blinked! (The grandma whips out some bee-spray and sprays everywhere in the car, climbing into the front seat, still trying to spray Barry) GIRL IN CAR: Spray him, Granny! DAD DRIVING THE CAR: What are you doing?! (Barry escapes the car through the air conditioner and is flying high above
the ground, safe.) BARRY: Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. (Barry sees that storm clouds are gathering and he can see rain clouds moving into this direction) : I gotta get home. : Can't fly in rain. : Can't fly in rain. (A rain drop hits Barry and one of his wings is damaged) : Can't fly in rain. (A second rain drop hits Barry again and he spirals downwards) Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! (WW2 plane sound effects are played as he plummets, and he crash-lands on a plant inside an apartment near the window) VANESSA BLOOME: Ken, could you close the window please? KEN== Hey, check out my new resume. I made it into a fold-out brochure. : You see? (Folds brochure resume out) Folds out. (Ken closes the window, trapping Barry inside) BARRY: Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. (Barry tries to fly away but smashes into the window and falls again) : What was that?
(Barry keeps trying to fly out the window but he keeps being knocked back because the window is closed) Maybe this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... : Drapes! (Barry taps the glass. He doesn't understand what it is) That is diabolical. KEN: It's fantastic. It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. ANDY: What's number one? Star Wars? KEN: Nah, I don't go for that... (Ken makes finger guns and makes "pew pew pew" sounds and then stops) : ...kind of stuff. BARRY: No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds. KEN: When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. BARRY: (Looking at the light on the ceiling) There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out. (Starts flying towards the lightbulb) : I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. (Barry hits the lightbulb and falls into the dip on the table that the humans are sitting at) KEN:
I predicted global warming. : I could feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. (Andy dips a chip into the bowl and scoops up some dip with Barry on it and is about to put it in his mouth) : Wait! Stop! Bee! (Andy drops the chip with Barry in fear and backs away. All the humans freak out) : Stand back. These are winter boots. (Ken has winter boots on his hands and he is about to smash the bee but Vanessa saves him last second) VANESSA: Wait! : Don't kill him! (Vanessa puts Barry in a glass to protect him) KEN: You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! VANESSA: Why does his life have less value than yours? KEN: Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your statement? VANESSA: I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. (Vanessa picks up Ken's brochure and puts it under the glass so she can carry Barry back to the window. Barry looks at Vanessa in amazement) KEN:
My brochure! VANESSA: There you go, little guy. (Vanessa opens the window and lets Barry out but Barry stays back and is still shocked that a human saved his life) KEN: I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. VANESSA: Put that on your resume brochure. KEN: My whole face could puff up. ANDY: Make it one of your special skills. KEN: Knocking someone out is also a special skill. (Ken walks to the door) Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. : - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night? VANESSA: - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. : (Vanessa tries to close door) KEN== - You could put carob chips on there. VANESSA: - Bye. (Closes door but Ken opens it again) KEN: - Supposed to be less calories.
VANESSA: - Bye. (Closes door) (Fast forward to the next day, Barry is still inside the house. He flies into the kitchen where Vanessa is doing dishes) BARRY== (Talking to himself) I gotta say something. : She saved my life. I gotta say something. : All right, here it goes. (Turns back) Nah. : What would I say? : I could really get in trouble. : It's a bee law. You're not supposed to talk to a human. : I can't believe I'm doing this. : I've got to. (Barry disguises himself as a character on a food can as Vanessa walks by again) : Oh, I can't do it. Come on! : No. Yes. No. : Do it. I can't.
: How should I start it? (Barry strikes a pose and wiggles his eyebrows) "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. (Vanessa is about to walk past Barry) Here she comes! Speak, you fool! : ...Hi! (Vanessa gasps and drops the dishes in fright and notices Barry on the counter) : I'm sorry. VANESSA: - You're talking. BARRY: - Yes, I know. VANESSA: (Pointing at Barry) You're talking! BARRY: I'm so sorry. VANESSA: No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. : But I don't recall going to bed. BARRY: Well, I'm sure this is very disconcerting. VANESSA: This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee!
BARRY: I am. And I'm not supposed to be doing this, (Pointing to the living room where Ken tried to kill him last night) but they were all trying to kill me. : And if it wasn't for you... : I had to thank you. It's just how I was raised. (Vanessa stabs her hand with a fork to test whether she's dreaming or not) : That was a little weird. VANESSA: - I'm talking with a bee. BARRY: - Yeah. VANESSA: I'm talking to a bee. And the bee is talking to me! BARRY: I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. (Barry turns to leave) VANESSA: - Wait! How did you learn to do that? BARRY: (Flying back) - What? VANESSA: The talking...thing. BARRY:
Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. VANESSA: - That's very funny. BARRY: - Yeah. : Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal with. : Anyway... VANESSA: Can I... : ...get you something? BARRY: - Like what? VANESSA: I don't know. I mean... I don't know. Coffee? BARRY: I don't want to put you out. VANESSA: It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. : - It's just coffee. BARRY: - I hate to impose. (Vanessa starts making coffee) VANESSA: - Don't be ridiculous!
BARRY: - Actually, I would love a cup. VANESSA: Hey, you want rum cake? BARRY: - I shouldn't. VANESSA: - Have some. BARRY: - No, I can't. VANESSA: - Come on! BARRY: I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. VANESSA: - Where? BARRY: - These stripes don't help. VANESSA: You look great! BARRY: I don't know if you know anything about fashion. : Are you all right? VANESSA: (Pouring coffee on the floor and missing the cup completely) No. (Flash forward in time. Barry and Vanessa are sitting together at a table on top of the apartment building drinking coffee)
: BARRY== He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. : He finally gets there. : He runs up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. : And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said Guatemalan. : Why would I marry a watermelon?" (Barry laughs but Vanessa looks confused) VANESSA: Is that a bee joke? BARRY: That's the kind of stuff we do. VANESSA: Yeah, different. : So, what are you gonna do, Barry? (Barry stands on top of a sugar cube floating in his coffee and paddles it around with a straw like it's a gondola) BARRY: About work? I don't know. : I want to do my part for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. VANESSA: I know how you feel.
BARRY: - You do? VANESSA: - Sure. : My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. BARRY: - Really? VANESSA: - My only interest is flowers. BARRY: Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. : Anyway, if you look... (Barry points to a tree in the middle of Central Park) : There's my hive right there. See it? VANESSA: You're in Sheep Meadow! BARRY: Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! VANESSA: No way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. BARRY: - Why do girls put rings on their toes? VANESSA: - Why not? BARRY:

• It's like putting a hat on your knee. VANESSA:
• Maybe I'll try that. (A custodian installing a lightbulb looks over at them but to his perspective it looks like Vanessa is talking to a cup of coffee on the table) CUSTODIAN:
• You all right, ma'am? VANESSA:
• Oh, yeah. Fine. : Just having two cups of coffee! BARRY: Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. VANESSA== Yeah, it's no trouble. BARRY: Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. (Barry points towards the rum cake) : Can I take a piece of this with me? VANESSA: Sure! Here, have a crumb. (Vanessa hands Barry a crumb but it is still pretty big for Barry) BARRY:
• Thanks! VANESSA:
• Yeah. BARRY: All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you around.
  : Or not. VANESSA: OK, Barry... BARRY: And thank you so much again... for before. VANESSA: Oh, that? That was nothing. BARRY: Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... (Vanessa and Barry hold hands, but Vanessa has to hold out a finger because her hands is to big and Barry holds that) (The custodian looks over again and it appears Vanessa is laughing at her coffee again. The lightbulb that he was screwing in sparks and he falls off the ladder) (Fast forward in time and we see two Bee Scientists testing out a parachute in a Honex wind tunnel) BEE SCIENTIST #1: This can't possibly work. BEE SCIENTIST #2: He's all set to go. We may as well try it. : OK, Dave, pull the chute. (Dave pulls the chute and the wind slams him against the wall and he falls on his face.The camera pans over and we see Barry and Adam walking together) ADAM:
  
• Sounds amazing. BARRY:
  
• It was amazing! : It was the scariest, happiest moment of my life.
  

ADAM: Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! : Giant, scary humans! What were they like? BARRY: Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. : They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. ADAM: - Do they try and kill you, like on TV? BARRY: - Some of them. But some of them don't. ADAM: - How'd you get back? BARRY: - Poodle. ADAM: You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. : You had your "experience." Now you can pick out your job and be normal. BARRY: - Well... ADAM: - Well? BARRY: Well, I met someone.
ADAM: You did? Was she Bee-ish? : - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! BARRY: - No, no, no, not a wasp. ADAM: - Spider? BARRY: - I'm not attracted to spiders. : I know, for everyone else, it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. : I can't get by that face. ADAM: So who is she? BARRY: She's... human. ADAM: No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. BARRY: - Her name's Vanessa. (Adam puts his head in his hands) ADAM: - Oh, boy. BARRY== She's so nice. And she's a florist! ADAM: Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!
BARRY: We're not dating. ADAM: You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes : with power washers and M-80s! That's one-eighth a stick of dynamite! BARRY: She saved my life! And she understands me. ADAM: This is over! BARRY: Eat this. (Barry gives Adam a piece of the crumb that he got from Vanessa. Adam eats it) ADAM: (Adam's tone changes) This is not over! What was that? BARRY: - They call it a crumb. ADAM: - It was so stingin' stripey! BARRY: And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! : - You know what a Cinnabon is? ADAM: - No. (Adam opens a door behind him and he pulls Barry in)
BARRY: It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. ADAM: Be quiet! BARRY: They heat it up... ADAM: Sit down! (Adam forces Barry to sit down) BARRY: (Still rambling about Cinnabons) ...really hot! (Adam grabs Barry by the shoulders) ADAM: - Listen to me! : We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! BARRY== Yes, but who can deny the heart that is yearning? ADAM: There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! : You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! BARRY: - Thinking bee. WORKER BEE: - Thinking bee. WORKER BEES AND ADAM: Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee! (Flash forward in time; Barry is laying on a raft in a pool full of honey. He is wearing sunglasses) JANET: There he is. He's in the pool. MARTIN: You know what your problem is, Barry? (Barry pulls down his sunglasses and he looks annoyed) BARRY: (Sarcastic) I gotta start thinking bee? JANET: How much longer will this go on? MARTIN: It's been three days! Why aren't you working? (Puts sunglasses back on) BARRY: I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. MARTIN: What life? You have no life! You have no job. You're barely a bee! JANET: Would it kill you to make a little honey? (Barry rolls off the raft and sinks into the honey pool) : Barry, come out. Your father's talking to you. : Martin, would you talk to him? MARTIN:
Barry, I'm talking to you! (Barry keeps sinking into the honey until he is suddenly in Central Park having a picnic with Vanessa) (Barry has a cup of honey and he clinks his glass with Vanessas. Suddenly a mosquito lands on Vanessa and she slaps it, killing it. They both gasp but then burst out laughing) VANESSA: You coming? (The camera pans over and Vanessa is climbing into a small yellow airplane) BARRY: Got everything? VANESSA: All set! BARRY: Go ahead. I'll catch up. (Vanessa lifts off and flies ahead) VANESSA: Don't be too long. (Barry catches up with Vanessa and he sticks out his arms like ana irplane. He rolls from side to side, and Vanessa copies him with the airplane) VANESSA: Watch this! (Barry stays back and watches as Vanessa draws a heart in the air using pink smoke from the plane, but on the last loop-the-loop she suddenly crashes into a mountain and the plane explodes. The destroyed plane falls into some rocks and explodes a second time) BARRY: Vanessa! (As Barry is yelling his mouth fills with honey and he wakes up, discovering that he was just day dreaming. He slowly sinks back into the honey pool) MARTIN: - We're still here.
JANET: - I told you not to yell at him. : He doesn't respond to yelling! MARTIN: - Then why yell at me? JANET: - Because you don't listen! MARTIN: I'm not listening to this. BARRY: Sorry, I've gotta go. MARTIN: - Where are you going? BARRY: - I'm meeting a friend. JANET: A girl? Is this why you can't decide? BARRY: Bye. (Barry flies out the door and Martin shakes his head) : JANET== I just hope she's Bee-ish. (Fast forward in time and Barry is sitting on Vanessa's shoulder and she is closing up her shop) BARRY: They have a huge parade of flowers every year in Pasadena? VANESSA: To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream!
: Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. BARRY: A tournament. Do the roses compete in athletic events? VANESSA: No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? BARRY: It's exhausting. Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. VANESSA: Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. BARRY: TiVo. You can just freeze live TV? That's insane! VANESSA: You don't have that? BARRY: We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a horrible, horrible disease. VANESSA: Oh, my. (A human walks by and Barry narrowly avoids him) PASSERBY: Dumb bees! VANESSA: You must want to sting all those jerks. BARRY: We try not to sting.
It's usually fatal for us. VANESSA: So you have to watch your temper (They walk into a store) BARRY: Very carefully. You kick a wall, take a walk, : write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: : Anger, jealousy, lust. (Suddenly an employee(Hector) hits Barry off of Vanessa's shoulder. Hector thinks he's saving Vanessa) VANESSA: (To Barry) Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? (Barry is getting up off the floor) BARRY: Yeah. VANESSA: (To Hector) - What is wrong with you?! HECTOR: (Confused) - It's a bug. VANESSA: He's not bothering anybody. Get out of here, you creep! (Vanessa hits Hector across the face with the magazine he had and then hits him in the head. Hector backs away covering his head) Barry: What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? (Vanessa sets Barry back on her shoulder)
VANESSA: Yeah, it was. How did you know? BARRY: It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. VANESSA: You've really got that down to a science. BARRY: - Oh, we have to. I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. VANESSA: - I'll bet. (Barry looks to his right and notices there is honey for sale in the aisle) BARRY: What in the name of Mighty Hercules is this? (Barry looks at all the brands of honey, shocked) How did this get here? Cute Bee, Golden Blossom, : Ray Liotta Private Select? (Barry puts his hands up and slowly turns around, a look of disgust on his face) VANESSA: - Is he that actor? BARRY: - I never heard of him. : - Why is this here? VANESSA: - For people. We eat it. BARRY:
You don't have enough food of your own?! (Hector looks back and notices that Vanessa is talking to Barry) VANESSA: - Well, yes. BARRY: - How do you get it? VANESSA: - Bees make it. BARRY: - I know who makes it! : And it's hard to make it! : There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! VANESSA: - It's organic. BARRY: - It's our-ganic! VANESSA: It's just honey, Barry. BARRY: Just what?! : Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of stealing! : You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! :
And it's on sale?! I'm getting to the bottom of this. : I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! (Flash forward in time; Barry paints his face with black strikes like a soldier and sneaks into the storage section of the store) (Two men, including Hector, are loading boxes into some trucks) : SUPERMARKET EMPLOYEE== Hey, Hector. : - You almost done? HECTOR: - Almost. (Barry takes a step to peak around the corner) (Whispering) He is here. I sense it. : Well, I guess I'll go home now (Hector pretends to walk away by walking in place and speaking loudly) : and just leave this nice honey out, with no one around. BARRY: You're busted, box boy! HECTOR: I knew I heard something! So you can talk! BARRY: I can talk. And now you'll start talking! : Where you getting the sweet stuff?
Who's your supplier? HECTOR: I don't understand. I thought we were friends. : The last thing we want to do is upset bees! (Hector takes a thumbtack out of the board behind him and sword-fights Barry. Barry is using his stinger like a sword) : You're too late! It's ours now! BARRY: You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! HECTOR: You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio! (Barry hits the thumbtack out of Hectors hand and Hector surrenders) Barry: Where is the honey coming from? : Tell me where! HECTOR: (Pointing to leaving truck) Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! (Barry chases after the truck but it is getting away. He flies onto a bicyclists' backpack and he catches up to the truck) CAR DRIVER: (To bicyclist) Crazy person! (Barry flies off and lands on the windshield of the Honey farms truck. Barry looks around and sees dead bugs splattered everywhere) BARRY: What horrible thing has happened here?
: These faces, they never knew what hit them. And now : they're on the road to nowhere! (Barry hears a sudden whisper) (Barry looks up and sees Mooseblood, a mosquito playing dead) MOOSEBLOOD: Just keep still. BARRY: What? You're not dead? MOOSEBLOOD: Do I look dead? They will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? BARRY: To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge here. MOOSEBLOOD: I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! ANOTHER BUG PLAYING DEAD: I'm going to Tacoma. (Barry looks at another bug) BARRY: - And you? MOOSEBLOOD: - He really is dead. BARRY: All right. (Another bug hits the windshield and the drivers notice. They activate the windshield wipers) MOOSEBLOOD== Uh-oh! (The windshield wipers are slowly sliding over the dead bugs and wiping
them off) BARRY: - What is that?! MOOSEBLOOD: - Oh, no! : - A wiper! Triple blade! BARRY: - Triple blade? MOOSEBLOOD: Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! (Mooseblood and Barry grab onto the wiper and they hold on as it wipes the windshield) Why does everything have to be so doggone clean?! : How much do you people need to see?! (Bangs on windshield) : Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window! RADIO IN TRUCK: From NPR News in Washington, I'm Carl Kasell. MOOSEBLOOD: But don't kill no more bugs! (Mooseblood and Barry are washed off by the wipr fluid) MOOSEBLOOD: - Bee! BARRY: - Moose blood guy!! (Barry starts screaming as he hangs onto the antenna) (Suddenly it is revealed that a water bug is also hanging on the antenna.
There is a pause and then Barry and the water bug both start screaming) TRUCK DRIVER: - You hear something? GUY IN TRUCK: - Like what? TRUCK DRIVER: Like tiny screaming. GUY IN TRUCK: Turn off the radio. (The antenna starts to lower until it gets to low and sinks into the truck. The water bug flies off and Barry is forced to let go and he is blown away. He luckily lands inside a horn on top of the truck where he finds Mooseblood, who was blown into the same place) MOOSEBLOOD: Whassup, bee boy? BARRY: Hey, Blood. (Fast forward in time and we see that Barry is deep in conversation with Mooseblood. They have been sitting in this truck for a while) BARRY: ...Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. MOOSEBLOOD: Wow! BARRY: I assume wherever this truck goes is where they're getting it. : I mean, that honey's ours. MOOSEBLOOD: - Bees hang tight. BARRY:

• We're all jammed in. : It's a close community. MOOSEBLOOD: Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. BARRY:
• What if you get in trouble? MOOSEBLOOD:
• You a mosquito, you in trouble. : Nobody likes us. They just smack. See a mosquito, smack, smack! BARRY: At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. MOOSEBLOOD: Mosquito girls try to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. : Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. (An ambulance passes by and it has a blood donation sign on it) You got to be kidding me! : Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! (Mooseblood leaves and flies onto the window of the ambulance where there are other mosquito's hanging out) :
• Hey, guys! OTHER MOSQUITO:
• Mooseblood!

MOOSEBLOOD: I knew I'd catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? (The truck goes out of view and Barry notices that the truck he's on is pulling into a camp of some sort) TRUCK DRIVER: We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's pretty much pure profit. (Barry flies out) BARRY: What is this place? BEEKEEPER 1#: A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. BEEKEEPER #2: They are pinheads! : Pinhead. : - Check out the new smoker. BEEKEEPER #1: - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. : The Thomas 3000! BARRY: Smoker? BEEKEEPER #1: Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. : A couple breaths of this knocks them right out.
BEEKEEPER #2: They make the honey, and we make the money. BARRY: "They make the honey, and we make the money"? (The Beekeeper sprays hundreds of cheap miniature apartments with the smoker. The bees are fainting or passing out) Oh, my! : What's going on? Are you OK? (Barry flies into one of the apartment and helps a Bee couple get off the ground. They are coughing and its hard for them to stand) BEE IN APARTMENT: Yeah. It doesn't last too long. BARRY: Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? BEE IN APPARTMENT: Our queen was moved here. We had no choice. (The apartment room is completely empty except for a photo on the wall of the "queen" who is obviously a man in women's clothes) BARRY: This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! : That's a drag queen! : What is this? (Barry flies out and he discovers that there are hundreds of these structures, each housing thousands of Bees) Oh, no! : There's hundreds of them! (Barry takes out his camera and takes pictures of these Bee work camps. The beekeepers look very evil in these depictions)
Bee honey. : Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive scale! : This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. (Flash forward in time and Barry is showing these pictures to his parents) JANET: Oh, Barry, stop. MARTIN: Who told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. BARRY: Do these look like rumors? (Holds up the pictures) UNCLE CARL: That's a conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. JANET: How did you get mixed up in this? ADAM: He's been talking to humans. JANET: - What? MARTIN: - Talking to humans?! ADAM: He has a human girlfriend. And they make out! JANET: Make out? Barry!
BARRY: We do not. ADAM: - You wish you could. MARTIN: - Whose side are you on? BARRY: The bees! UNCLE CARL: (He has been sitting in the back of the room this entire time) I dated a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. JANET: Barry, this is what you want to do with your life? BARRY: I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! : Dad, I remember you coming home so overworked : your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. JANET: I remember that. BARRY: What right do they have to our honey? : We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!
ADAM: Even if it's true, what can one bee do? BARRY: Sting them where it really hurts. MARTIN: In the face! The eye! : - That would hurt. BARRY: - No. MARTIN: Up the nose? That's a killer. BARRY: There's only one place you can sting the humans, one place where it matters. (Flash forward a bit in time and we are watching the Bee News) BEE NEWS NARRATOR: Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news source. BEE PROTESTOR: No more bee beards! BEE NEWS NARRATOR: With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. : Weather with Storm Stinger. : Sports with Buzz Larvi. : And Jeanette Chung. BOB BUMBLE: - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. JEANETTE CHUNG:

• And I'm Jeanette Chung. BOB BUMBLE: A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, : intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey, : packaging it and profiting from it illegally! JEANETTE CHUNG: Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, : we'll have three former queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, : Classy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon. (The scene changes to an interview on the news with Bee version of Larry King and Barry) BEE LARRY KING: Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. : Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"? BARRY: Bees have never been afraid to change the world. : What about Bee Columbus? Bee Gandhi? Bejesus? BEE LARRY KING: Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.
  : We were thinking of stickball or candy stores. BARRY: How old are you? BEE LARRY KING: The bee community is supporting you in this case, : which will be the trial of the bee century. BARRY: You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. BEE LARRY KING: It's a common name. Next week... BARRY: He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... BEE LARRY KING: Next week... BARRY: Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. BEE LARRY KING: Bear Week next week! They're scary, hairy and here, live. (Bee Larry King gets annoyed and flies away offscreen) BARRY: Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very Jewish. (Flash forward in time. We see Vanessa enter and Ken enters behind her. They are arguing)
  

KEN: In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! VANESSA: It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81. KEN== Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? BARRY: (To Ken) Quiet, please. Actual work going on here. KEN: (Pointing at Barry) - Is that that same bee? VANESSA: - Yes, it is! : I'm helping him sue the human race. BARRY: - Hello. KEN: - Hello, bee. VANESSA: This is Ken. BARRY: (Recalling the "Winter Boots" incident earlier) Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe. KEN: (To Vanessa) Why does he talk again? VANESSA:
Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. KEN: But it's our yogurt night! VANESSA: (Holding door open for Ken) Bye-bye. KEN: (Yelling) Why is yogurt night so difficult?! (Ken leaves and Vanessa walks over to Barry. His workplace is a mess) VANESSA: You poor thing. You two have been at this for hours! BARRY: Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. ADAM: - Frosting... - How many sugars? ==BARRY== Just one. I try not to use the competition. : So why are you helping me? VANESSA: Bees have good qualities. : And it takes my mind off the shop. : Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. BARRY:
Those are great, if you're three. VANESSA: And artificial flowers. BARRY: - Oh, those just get me psychotic! VANESSA: - Yeah, me too. : BARRY: Bent stingers, pointless pollination. ADAM: Bees must hate those fake things! : Nothing worse than a daffodil that's had work done. : Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. VANESSA: - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. BARRY: - I guess. ADAM: You sure you want to go through with it? BARRY: Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they won't be able : to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! (Flash forward in time and we are watching the human news. The camera shows
a crowd outside a courthouse) NEWS REPORTER: It's an incredible scene here in downtown Manhattan, : where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, : we will hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. (We are no longer watching through a news camera) ADAM: What have we gotten into here, Barry? BARRY: It's pretty big, isn't it? ADAM== (Looking at the hundreds of people around the courthouse) I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. BARRY: You think billion-dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? SECURITY GUARD: Everybody needs to stay behind the barricade. (A limousine drives up and a fat man,Layton Montgomery, a honey industry owner gets out and walks past Barry) ADAM: - What's the matter? BARRY: - I don't know, I just got a chill. (Fast forward in time and everyone is in the court) MONTGOMERY: Well, if it isn't the bee team.
(To Honey Industry lawyers) You boys work on this? MAN: All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. JUDGE BUMBLETON: All right. Case number 4475, : Superior Court of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry : is now in session. : Mr. Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? MONTGOMERY: A privilege. JUDGE BUMBLETON: Mr. Benson... you're representing all the bees of the world? (Everyone looks closely, they are waiting to see if a Bee can really talk) (Barry makes several buzzing sounds to sound like a Bee) BARRY: I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed. JUDGE BUMBLBETON: Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. MONTGOMERY: Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, : my grandmother was a simple woman. :
Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right : to benefit from the bounty of nature God put before us. : If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson imagines, : just think of what would it mean. : I would have to negotiate with the silkworm : for the elastic in my britches! : Talking bee! (Montgomery walks over and looks closely at Barry) : How do we know this isn't some sort of : holographic motion-picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? : They could be using laser beams! : Robotics! Ventriloquism! Cloning! For all we know, : he could be on steroids! JUDGE BUMBLETON: Mr. Benson?
BARRY: Ladies and gentlemen, there's no trickery here. : I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. : It's important to all bees. We invented it! : We make it. And we protect it with our lives. : Unfortunately, there are some people in this room : who think they can take it from us : 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all over, : you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have : but everything we are! JANET== (To Martin) I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! JUDGE BUMBLETON: Call your first witness. BARRY: So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden
of Honey Farms, big company you have. KLAUSS VANDERHAYDEN: I suppose so. BARRY: I see you also own Honeyburton and Honron! KLAUSS: Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. BARRY: Beekeeper. I find that to be a very disturbing term. : I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? KLAUSS: (Quietly) - No. BARRY: - I couldn't hear you. KLAUSS: - No. BARRY: - No. : Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, : it seems you thought a bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. KLAUSS: They're very lovable creatures.
: Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. BARRY: You mean like this? (The bear from Over The Hedge barges in through the back door and it is roaring and standing on its hind legs. It is thrashing its claws and people are screaming. It is being held back by a guard who has the bear on a chain) : (Pointing to the roaring bear) Bears kill bees! : How'd you like his head crashing through your living room?! : Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! JUDGE BUMBLETON: OK, that's enough. Take him away. (The bear stops roaring and thrashing and walks out) BARRY: So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. : - Where have I heard it before? MR. STING: - I was with a band called The Police. BARRY: But you've never been a police officer, have you? STING: No, I haven't. BARRY:
No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example : of bee culture casually stolen by a human : for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. STING: Oh, please. BARRY: Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? : Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. : Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner! MONTGOMERY: That's not his real name?! You idiots! BARRY: Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations on : your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. RAY LIOTTA: Thank you. Thank you. BARRY: I see from your resume that you're devilishly handsome : with a churning inner turmoil
that's ready to blow. RAY LIOTTA: I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime? BARRY: Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? : Exploiting tiny, helpless bees so you don't : have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? RAY LIOTTA: Watch it, Benson! I could blow right now! BARRY: This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! (Ray Liotta looses it and tries to grab Barry) RAY LIOTTA: Why doesn't someone just step on this creep, and we can all go home?! JUDGE BUMBLETON: - Order in this court! RAY LIOTTA: - You're all thinking it! (Judge Bumbleton starts banging her gavel) JUDGE BUMBLETON: Order! Order, I say! RAY LIOTTA: - Say it! MAN:

• Mr. Liotta, please sit down! (We see a montage of magazines which feature the court case) (Flash forward in time and Barry is back home with Vanessa) BARRY: I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. VANESSA: I think the jury's on our side. BARRY: Are we doing everything right,you know, legally? VANESSA: I'm a florist. BARRY: Right. Well, here's to a great team. VANESSA: To a great team! (Ken walks in from work. He sees Barry and he looks upset when he sees Barry clinking his glass with Vanessa) KEN: Well, hello. VANESSA:
• Oh, Ken! BARRY:
• Hello! VANESSA: I didn't think you were coming. : No, I was just late. I tried to call, but... (Ken holds up his phone and flips it open. The phone has no charge) ...the battery... VANESSA:

I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free. KEN: Oh, that was lucky. (Ken sits down at the table across from Barry and Vanessa leaves the room) VANESSA: There's a little left. I could heat it up. KEN: (Not taking his eyes off Barry) Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. BARRY: So I hear you're quite a tennis player. : I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. KEN: That's where I usually sit. Right... (Points to where Barry is sitting) there. VANESSA: (Calling from other room) Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, : and he agreed with me that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. KEN: (To Barry) You think I don't see what you're doing? BARRY: I know how hard it is to find the right job. We have that in common.
KEN: Do we? BARRY: Bees have 100 percent employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. KEN: (Menacingly) That's just what I was thinking about doing. (Ken reaches for a fork on the table but knocks if on the floor. He goes to pick it up) VANESSA: Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. (Ken quickly rises back up after hearing this but hits his head on the table and yells) BARRY: I'm going to drain the old stinger. KEN: Yeah, you do that. (Barry flies past Ken to get to the bathroom and Ken freaks out, splashing some of the wine he was using to cool his head in his eyes. He yells in anger) (Barry looks at the magazines featuring his victories in court) BARRY: Look at that. (Barry flies into the bathroom) (He puts his hand on his head but this makes hurts him and makes him even madder. He yells again) (Barry is washing his hands in the sink but then Ken walks in) KEN: You know, you know I've just about had it (Closes bathroom door behind him) with your little mind games. (Ken is menacingly rolling up a magazine) BARRY:
(Backing away) - What's that? KEN: - Italian Vogue. BARRY: Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. KEN: It's a lot of ads. BARRY: Remember what Van said, why is your life more valuable than mine? KEN: That's funny, I just can't seem to recall that! (Ken smashes everything off the sink with the magazine and Barry narrowly escapes) (Ken follows Barry around and tries to hit him with the magazine but he keeps missing) (Ken gets a spray bottle) : I think something stinks in here! BARRY: (Enjoying the spray) I love the smell of flowers. (Ken holds a lighter in front of the spray bottle) KEN: How do you like the smell of flames?! BARRY: Not as much. (Ken fires his make-shift flamethrower but misses Barry, burning the bathroom. He torches the whole room but looses his footing and falls into the bathtub. After getting hit in the head by falling objects 3 times he picks up the shower head, revealing a Water bug hiding under it) WATER BUG: Water bug! Not taking sides!
(Barry gets up out of a pile of bathroom supplies and he is wearing a chapstick hat) BARRY: Ken, I'm wearing a Chapstick hat! This is pathetic! (Ken switches the shower head to lethal) KEN: I've got issues! (Ken sprays Barry with the shower head and he crash lands into the toilet) (Ken menacingly looks down into the toilet at Barry) Well, well, well, a royal flush! BARRY: - You're bluffing. KEN: - Am I? (flushes toilet) (Barry grabs a chapstick from the toilet seat and uses it to surf in the flushing toilet) BARRY: Surf's up, dude! (Barry flies out of the toilet on the chapstick and sprays Ken's face with the toilet water) : EW,Poo water! BARRY: That bowl is gnarly. KEN: (Aiming a toilet cleaner at Barry) Except for those dirty yellow rings! (Barry cowers and covers his head and Vanessa runs in and takes the toilet cleaner from Ken just before he hits Barry) VANESSA: Kenneth! What are you doing?! KEN== (Leaning towards Barry)
You know, I don't even like honey! I don't eat it! VANESSA: We need to talk! (Vanessa pulls Ken out of the bathroom) : He's just a little bee! : And he happens to be the nicest bee I've met in a long time! KEN: Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life? VANESSA: No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! KEN: Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night... : My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! VANESSA: Goodbye, Ken. (Ken huffs and walks out and slams the door. But suddenly he walks back in and stares at Barry) : And for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners MADE BY MAN! (Ken leaves again and Vanessa leans in towards Barry) VANESSA: I'm sorry about all that. (Ken walks back in again)
KEN: I know it's got an aftertaste! I LIKE IT! (Ken leaves for the last time) VANESSA: I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me. : I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. : Are you OK for the trial? BARRY: I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of ideas. (Flash forward in time and Barry, Adam, and Vanessa are back in court) MONTGOMERY-- We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. ADAM: Good idea! You can really see why he's considered one of the best lawyers... (Barry stares at Adam) ...Yeah. LAWYER: Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this jury, or it's gonna be all over. MONTGOMERY: Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around : is to remind them of what they don't like about bees. (To lawyer)

• You got the tweezers? LAWYER:
• Are you allergic? MONTGOMERY: Only to losing, son. Only to losing. : Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. : What exactly is your relationship (Points to Vanessa) : to that woman? BARRY: We're friends. MONTGOMERY:
• Good friends? BARRY:
• Yes. MONTGOMERY: How good? Do you live together? ADAM: Wait a minute... : MONTGOMERY: Are you her little... : ...bedbug? (Adam's stinger starts vibrating. He is agitated) I've seen a bee documentary or two. From what I understand,
  : doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? BARRY:
  
• Yeah, but... MONTGOMERY: (Pointing at Janet and Martin)
  
• So those aren't your real parents! JANET:
  
• Oh, Barry... BARRY:
  
• Yes, they are! ADAM: Hold me back! (Vanessa tries to hold Adam back. He wants to sting Montgomery) MONTGOMERY: You're an illegitimate bee, aren't you, Benson? ADAM: He's denouncing bees! MONTGOMERY: Don't y'all date your cousins? (Montgomery leans over on the jury stand and stares at Adam) VANESSA:
  
• Objection! (Vanessa raises her hand to object but Adam gets free. He flies straight at Montgomery) =ADAM:
  
• I'm going to pincushion this guy! BARRY: Adam, don't! It's what he wants! (Adam stings Montgomery in the butt and he starts thrashing around)
  

MONTGOMERY: Oh, I'm hit!! : Oh, lordy, I am hit! JUDGE BUMBLETON: (Banging gavel) Order! Order! MONTGOMERY: (Overreacting) The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! : I have been felled by a winged beast of destruction! : You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! : Stinging's the only thing they know! It's their way! BARRY: - Adam, stay with me. ADAM: - I can't feel my legs. MONTGOMERY: (Overreacting and throwing his body around the room) What angel of mercy will come forward to suck the poison : from my heaving buttocks? JUDGE BUMLBETON: I will have order in this court. Order!
: Order, please! (Flash forward in time and we see a human news reporter) NEWS REPORTER: The case of the honeybees versus the human race : took a pointed turn against the bees : yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. (Adam is laying in a hospital bed and Barry flies in to see him) BARRY: - Hey, buddy. ADAM: - Hey. BARRY: - Is there much pain? ADAM: - Yeah. : I... : I blew the whole case, didn't I? BARRY: It doesn't matter. What matters is you're alive. You could have died. ADAM: I'd be better off dead. Look at me. (A small plastic sword is replaced as Adam's stinger) They got it from the cafeteria downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.
: Look, there's a little celery still on it. (Flicks off the celery and sighs) BARRY: What was it like to sting someone? ADAM: I can't explain it. It was all... : All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! BARRY: ...All right. ADAM: You think it was all a trap? BARRY: Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. : What were we thinking? Look at us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. ADAM: What will the humans do to us if they win? BARRY: I don't know. ADAM: I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. BARRY: Adam, they check in, but they don't check out!
ADAM: Oh, my. (Coughs) Could you get a nurse to close that window? BARRY: - Why? ADAM: - The smoke. (We can see that two humans are smoking cigarettes outside) : Bees don't smoke. BARRY: Right. Bees don't smoke. : Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. : That's it! That's our case! ADAM: It is? It's not over? BARRY: Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. : Get back to the court and stall. Stall any way you can. (Flash forward in time and Adam is making a paper boat in the courtroom) ADAM: And assuming you've done step 29 correctly, you're ready for the tub! (We see that the jury have each made their own paper boats after being taught how by Adam. They all look confused) JUDGE BUMBLETON:
Mr. Flayman. ADAM: Yes? Yes, Your Honor! JUDGE BUMBLETON: Where is the rest of your team? ADAM: (Continues stalling) Well, Your Honor, it's interesting. : Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, : and as a result, we don't make very good time. : I actually heard a funny story about... MONTGOMERY: Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs : taken up enough of this court's valuable time? : How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? : They have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges : against my clients, who run legitimate businesses. : I move for a complete dismissal
of this entire case! JUDGE BUMBLETON: Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going : to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. ADAM: But you can't! We have a terrific case. MONTGOMERY: Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? : Show me the smoking gun! BARRY: (Barry flies in through the door) Hold it, Your Honor! You want a smoking gun? : Here is your smoking gun. (Vanessa walks in holding a bee smoker. She sets it down on the Judge's podium) JUDGE BUMBLETON: What is that? BARRY: It's a bee smoker! MONTGOMERY: (Picks up smoker) What, this? This harmless little contraption? : This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. (Montgomery accidentally fires it at the bees in the crowd and they faint
and cough) (Dozens of reporters start taking pictures of the suffering bees) BARRY: Look at what has happened : to bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" : Is this what nature intended for us? : To be forcibly addicted to smoke machines : and man-made wooden slat work camps? : Living out our lives as honey slaves to the white man? (Barry points to the honey industry owners. One of them is an African American so he awkwardly separates himself from the others) LAWYER: - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. BARRY: Ladies and gentlemen, please, free these bees! ADAM AND VANESSA: Free the bees! Free the bees! BEES IN CROWD: Free the bees! HUMAN JURY: Free the bees! Free the bees! JUDGE BUMBLETON: The court finds in favor of the bees!
BARRY: Vanessa, we won! VANESSA: I knew you could do it! High-five! (Vanessa hits Barry hard because her hand is too big) : Sorry. BARRY: (Overjoyed) I'm OK! You know what this means? : All the honey will finally belong to the bees. : Now we won't have to work so hard all the time. MONTGOMERY: This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature, Benson. : You'll regret this. (Montgomery leaves and Barry goes outside the courtroom. Several reporters start asking Barry questions) REPORTER 1#: Barry, how much honey is out there? BARRY: All right. One at a time. REPORTER 2#: Barry, who are you wearing? BARRY: My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants.
(Barry flies outside with the paparazzi and Adam and Vanessa stay back) ADAM: (To Vanessa) - What if Montgomery's right? Vanessa: - What do you mean? ADAM: We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. (Flash forward in time and Barry is talking to a man) BUSINESS MAN: Congratulations on your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? BARRY: First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all bee work camps. (As Barry is talking we see a montage of men putting "closed" tape over the work camps and freeing the bees in the crappy apartments) Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, : every last drop. (Men in suits are pushing all the honey of the aisle and into carts) We demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more (We see a statue of a bear-shaped honey container being pulled down by bees) than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath stink machine. : We're all aware of what they do in the woods. (We see Winnie the Pooh sharing his honey with Piglet in the cross-hairs of a high-tech sniper rifle) BARRY: (Looking through binoculars)
Wait for my signal. : Take him out. (Winnie gets hit by a tranquilizer dart and dramatically falls off the log he was standing on, his tongue hanging out. Piglet looks at Pooh in fear and the Sniper takes the honey.) SNIPER: He'll have nausea for a few hours, then he'll be fine. (Flash forward in time) BARRY: And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative nicknames... (Mr. Sting is sitting at home until he is taken out of his house by the men in suits) STING: But it's just a prance-about stage name! BARRY: ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus health products : and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. (An old lady is mixing honey into her tea but suddenly men in suits smash her face down on the table and take the honey) OLD LADY: Can't breathe. (A honey truck pulls up to Barry's hive) WORKER: Bring it in, boys! : Hold it right there! Good. : Tap it.
(Tons of honey is being pumped into the hive's storage) BEE WORKER 1#: (Honey overflows from the cup) Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more coming! : - I think we need to shut down! =BEE WORKER #2= - Shut down? We've never shut down. : Shut down honey production! DEAN BUZZWELL: Stop making honey! (The bees all leave their stations. Two bees run into a room and they put the keys into a machine) Turn your key, sir! (Two worker bees dramatically turn their keys, which opens the button which they press, shutting down the honey-making machines. This is the first time this has ever happened) BEE: ...What do we do now? (Flash forward in time and a Bee is about to jump into a pool full of honey) Cannonball! (The bee gets stuck in the honey and we get a short montage of Bees leaving work) (We see the Pollen Jocks flying but one of them gets a call on his antenna) LOU LU DUVA: (Through "phone") We're shutting honey production! : Mission abort. POLLEN JOCK #1: Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. (The Pollen Jocks fly back to the hive)
(We get a time lapse of Central Park slowly wilting away as the bees all relax) BARRY: Adam, you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. ADAM: Oh, yeah? BARRY: What's going on? Where is everybody? (The entire street is deserted) : - Are they out celebrating? ADAM: - They're home. : They don't know what to do. Laying out, sleeping in. : I heard your Uncle Carl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. BARRY: At least we got our honey back. ADAM: Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? : It's the greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. : This was my new desk. This was my new job. I wanted to do it really well. :
And now... : Now I can't. (Flash forward in time and Barry is talking to Vanessa) BARRY: I don't understand why they're not happy. : I thought their lives would be better! : They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really changes people. VANESSA: You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? BARRY: - What did you want to show me? (Vanessa takes Barry to the rooftop where they first had coffee and points to her store) VANESSA: - This. (Points at her flowers. They are all grey and wilting) BARRY: What happened here? VANESSA: That is not the half of it. (Small flash forward in time and Vanessa and Barry are on the roof of her store and she points to Central Park) (We see that Central Park is no longer green and colorful, rather it is grey, brown, and dead-like. It is very depressing to look at) BARRY: Oh, no. Oh, my. :
They're all wilting. VANESSA: Doesn't look very good, does it? BARRY: No. VANESSA: And whose fault do you think that is? BARRY: You know, I'm gonna guess bees. VANESSA== (Staring at Barry) Bees? BARRY: Specifically, me. : I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all these things. VANESSA: It's not just flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. BARRY: That's our whole SAT test right there. VANESSA: Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. : And then, of course... BARRY: The human species? : So if there's no more pollination,
: it could all just go south here, couldn't it? VANESSA: I know this is also partly my fault. BARRY: How about a suicide pact? VANESSA: How do we do it? BARRY: - I'll sting you, you step on me. VANESSA: - That just kills you twice. BARRY: Right, right. VANESSA: Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. (Vanessa leaves) BARRY: (To himself) I had to open my mouth and talk. : Vanessa? : Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? (Vanessa is getting into a taxi) VANESSA: To the final Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. :
They've moved it to this weekend because all the flowers are dying. : It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. BARRY: Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I never meant it to turn out like this. VANESSA: I know. Me neither. (The taxi starts to drive away) BARRY: Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports. : Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? : Roses! : Vanessa! (Barry flies after the Taxi) VANESSA: Roses?! : Barry? (Barry is flying outside the window of the taxi) BARRY: - Roses are flowers! VANESSA: - Yes, they are. BARRY: Flowers, bees, pollen!
VANESSA: I know. That's why this is the last parade. BARRY: Maybe not. Could you ask him to slow down? VANESSA: Could you slow down? (The taxi driver screeches to a stop and Barry keeps flying forward) : Barry! (Barry flies back to the window) BARRY: OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my fault. VANESSA: Yes, it kind of is. BARRY: I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you : with the flower shop. I've made it worse. VANESSA: Actually, it's completely closed down. BARRY: I thought maybe you were remodeling. : But I have another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. VANESSA: I don't want to hear it!
BARRY: All right, they have the roses, the roses have the pollen. : I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. : All we gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. : - Bees. VANESSA: - Park. BARRY: - Pollen! VANESSA: - Flowers. BARRY: - Re-pollination! VANESSA: - Across the nation! : Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, California. : They've got nothing but flowers, floats and cotton candy. : Security will be tight. BARRY: I have an idea.
(Flash forward in time. Vanessa is about to board a plane which has all the Roses on board. VANESSA: Vanessa Bloome, FTD. (Holds out badge) : Official floral business. It's real. SECURITY GUARD: Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. =VANESSA== Thank you. It was a gift. (Barry is revealed to be hiding inside the brooch) (Flash back in time and Barry and Vanessa are discussing their plan) BARRY: Once inside, we just pick the right float. VANESSA: How about The Princess and the Pea? : I could be the princess, and you could be the pea! BARRY: Yes, I got it. : - Where should I sit? GUARD: - What are you? BARRY: - I believe I'm the pea. GUARD: - The pea? VANESSA:
It goes under the mattresses. GUARD: - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. VANESSA: You do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! : Let's see what this baby'll do. (Vanessa drives the float through traffic) GUARD: Hey, what are you doing?! BARRY== Then all we do is blend in with traffic... : ...without arousing suspicion. : Once at the airport, there's no stopping us. (Flash forward in time and Barry and Vanessa are about to get on a plane) SECURITY GUARD: Stop! Security. : - You and your insect pack your float? VANESSA: - Yes. SECURITY GUARD: Has it been in your possession the entire time? VANESSA: - Yes.
SECURITY GUARD: Would you remove your shoes? (To Barry) - Remove your stinger. BARRY: - It's part of me. SECURITY GUARD: I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. (Barry plotting with Vanessa) BARRY: Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to do the job. (Flash forward in time and Barry and Vanessa are flying on the plane) Can you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! VANESSA: I think this is gonna work. BARRY: It's got to work. CAPTAIN SCOTT: (On intercom) Attention, passengers, this is Captain Scott. : We have a bit of bad weather in New York. : It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. VANESSA: Barry, these are cut flowers with no water. They'll never make it. BARRY:
I gotta get up there and talk to them. VANESSA== Be careful. (Barry flies right outside the cockpit door) BARRY: Can I get help with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer. (The flight attendant opens the door and walks out and Barry flies into the cockpit unseen) BARRY: Captain, I'm in a real situation. CAPTAIN SCOTT: - What'd you say, Hal? CO-PILOT HAL: - Nothing. (Scott notices Barry and freaks out) CAPTAIN SCOTT: Bee! BARRY: No,no,no, Don't freak out! My entire species... (Captain Scott gets out of his seat and tries to suck Barry into a handheld vacuum) HAL: (To Scott) What are you doing? (Barry lands on Hals hair but Scott sees him. He tries to suck up Barry but instead he sucks up Hals toupee) CAPTAIN SCOTT: Uh-oh. BARRY: - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!
HAL: (Hal doesn't know Barry is on his head) - Who's an attorney? CAPTAIN SCOTT: Don't move. (Scott hits Hal in the face with the vacuum in an attempt to hit Barry. Hal is knocked out and he falls on the life raft button which launches an infalatable boat into Scott, who gets knocked out and falls to the floor. They are both uncounscious.) BARRY: (To himself) Oh, Barry. BARRY: (On intercom, with a Southern accent) Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. : Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B please report to the cockpit? (Vanessa looks confused) (Normal accent) ...And please hurry! (Vanessa opens the door and sees the life raft and the uncounscious pilots) VANESSA: What happened here? BARRY: I tried to talk to them, but then there was a DustBuster, a toupee, a life raft exploded. : Now one's bald, one's in a boat, and they're both unconscious! VANESSA: ...Is that another bee joke? BARRY:

• No! : No one's flying the plane! BUD DITCHWATER: (Through radio on plane) This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status? VANESSA: This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. BUD: Where's the pilot? VANESSA: He's unconscious, and so is the copilot. BUD: Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? BARRY: As a matter of fact, there is. BUD:
• Who's that? BARRY:
• Barry Benson. BUD: From the honey trial?! Oh, great. BARRY: Vanessa, this is nothing more than a big metal bee. : It's got giant wings, huge engines.

VANESSA: I can't fly a plane. BARRY: - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot? VANESSA: - Yes. BARRY: How hard could it be? (Vanessa sits down and flies for a little bit but we see lightning clouds outside the window) VANESSA: Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. (An ominous lightning storm looms in front of the plane) (We are now watching the Bee News) BOB BUMBLE: This is Bob Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, : where a suspenseful scene is developing. : Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... ADAM: That's Barry! BOB BUMBLE: ...is attempting to land a plane, loaded with people, flowers : and an incapacitated flight crew. JANET, MARTIN, UNCLE CAR AND ADAM: Flowers?! (The scene switches to the human news)
REPORTER: (Talking with Bob Bumble) We have a storm in the area and two individuals at the controls : with absolutely no flight experience. BOB BUMBLE: Just a minute. There's a bee on that plane. BUD: I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. : They've done enough damage. REPORTER: But isn't he your only hope? BUD: Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. : Their wings are too small... BARRY: (Through radio) Haven't we heard this a million times? : "The surface area of the wings and body mass make no sense."... BOB BUMBLE: - Get this on the air! BEE: - Got it.
BEE NEWS CREW: - Stand by. BEE NEWS CREW: - We're going live! BARRY: (Through radio on TV) ...The way we work may be a mystery to you. : Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. : But let me tell you about a small job. : If you do it well, it makes a big difference. : More than we realized. To us, to everyone. : That's why I want to get bees back to working together. : That's the bee way! We're not made of Jell-O. : We get behind a fellow. : - Black and yellow! BEES: - Hello! (The scene switches and Barry is teaching Vanessa how to fly) BARRY:
Left, right, down, hover. VANESSA: - Hover? BARRY: - Forget hover. VANESSA: This isn't so hard. (Pretending to honk the horn) Beep-beep! Beep-beep! (A Lightning bolt hits the plane and autopilot turns off) Barry, what happened?! BARRY: Wait, I think we were on autopilot the whole time. VANESSA: - That may have been helping me. BARRY: - And now we're not! VANESSA: So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. (The plane plummets but we see Lou Lu Duva and the Pollen Jocks, along with multiple other bees flying towards the plane) Lou Lu DUva: All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! : Move out! (The scene switches back to Vanessa and Barry in the plane) BARRY: Our only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! (Barry sticks out his arms like an airplane and flys in front of Vanessa's face)
VANESSA: Don't have to yell. BARRY: I'm not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. VANESSA: It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your voice! BARRY: It's not a tone. I'm panicking! VANESSA: I can't do this! (Barry slaps Vanessa) BARRY: Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to snap out of it! VANESSA: (Slaps Barry) You snap out of it. BARRY: (Slaps Vanessa) : You snap out of it. VANESSA: - You snap out of it! BARRY: - You snap out of it! (We see that all the Pollen Jocks are flying under the plane) VANESSA: - You snap out of it! BARRY: - You snap out of it!
VANESSA: - You snap out of it! BARRY: - You snap out of it! VANESSA: - Hold it! BARRY: - Why? Come on, it's my turn. VANESSA: How is the plane flying? (The plane is now safely flying) VANESSA: I don't know. (Barry's antennae rings like a phone. Barry picks up) BARRY: Hello? LOU LU DUVA: (Through "phone") Benson, got any flowers for a happy occasion in there? (All of the Pollen Jocks are carrying the plane) BARRY: The Pollen Jocks! : They do get behind a fellow. LOU LU DUVA: - Black and yellow. POLLEN JOCKS: - Hello. LOU LU DUVA: All right, let's drop this tin can
on the blacktop. BARRY: Where? I can't see anything. Can you? VANESSA: No, nothing. It's all cloudy. : Come on. You got to think bee, Barry. BARRY: - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. (On the runway there are millions of bees laying on their backs) BEES: Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! BARRY: Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. VANESSA: - What? BARRY: - I don't know. It's strong, pulling me. : Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. : Bring the nose down. BEES: Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! CONTROL TOWER OPERATOR: - What in the world is on the tarmac? BUD: - Get some lights on that!
(It is revealed that all the bees are organized into a giant pulsating flower formation) BEES: Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Thinking bee! BARRY: - Vanessa, aim for the flower. VANESSA: - OK. BARRY: Out the engines. We're going in on bee power. Ready, boys? LOU LU DUVA: Affirmative! BARRY: Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. : Land on that flower! : Ready? Full reverse! : Spin it around! (The plane's nose is pointed at a flower painted on a nearby plane) - Not that flower! The other one! VANESSA: - Which one? BARRY: - That flower. (The plane is now pointed at a fat guy in a flowered shirt. He freaks out and tries to take a picture of the plane) VANESSA: - I'm aiming at the flower!
BARRY: That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made of millions of bees! (The plane hovers over the bee-flower) : Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. : Rotate around it. VANESSA: - This is insane, Barry! BARRY: - This's the only way I know how to fly. BUD: Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like pattern? (The plane is unrealistically hovering and spinning over the bee-flower) BARRY: Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! : Just drop it. Be a part of it. : Aim for the center! : Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! : Come on, already. (The bees scatter and the plane safely lands) VANESSA: Barry, we did it! You taught me how to fly!
BARRY: - Yes! (Vanessa is about to high-five Barry) No high-five! VANESSA: - Right. ADAM: Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? BARRY: What giant flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! ADAM: - Thank you. BARRY: - But we're not done yet. : Listen, everyone! : This runway is covered with the last pollen : from the last flowers available anywhere on Earth. : That means this is our last chance. : We're the only ones who make honey, pollinate flowers and dress like this. : If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What do you say?
: Are we going to be bees, or just Museum of Natural History keychains? BEES: We're bees! BEE WHO LIKES KEYCHAINS: Keychain! BARRY: Then follow me! Except Keychain. POLLEN JOCK #1: Hold on, Barry. Here. : You've earned this. BARRY: Yeah! : I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. (The Pollen Jocks throw Barry a nectar-collecting gun. Barry catches it) Oh, yeah. JANET: That's our Barry. (Barry and the Pollen Jocks get pollen from the flowers on the plane) (Flash forward in time and the Pollen Jocks are flying over NYC) : (Barry pollinates the flowers in Vanessa's shop and then heads to Central Park) BOY IN PARK: Mom! The bees are back! ADAM: (Putting on his Krelman hat) If anybody needs
to make a call, now's the time. : I got a feeling we'll be working late tonight! (The bee honey factories are back up and running) (Meanwhile at Vanessa's shop) VANESSA: (To customer) Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Can I help who's next? : Would you like some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. (There is a room in the shop where Barry does legal work for other animals. He is currently talking with a Cow) COW: Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I don't see a nickel! : Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! BARRY: I had no idea. VANESSA: Barry, I'm sorry. Have you got a moment? BARRY: Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. MOOSEBLOOD: Sorry I'm late. COW: He's a lawyer too?
MOOSEBLOOD: Ma'am, I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. VANESSA: Have a great afternoon! : Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. BARRY: No problem, Vannie. Just leave it to me. VANESSA: You're a lifesaver, Barry. Can I help who's next? BARRY: All right, scramble, jocks! It's time to fly. VANESSA: Thank you, Barry! (Ken walks by on the sidewalk and sees the "bee-approved honey" in Vanessa's shop) KEN: That bee is living my life!! ANDY: Let it go, Kenny. KEN: - When will this nightmare end?! ANDY: - Let it all go. BARRY: - Beautiful day to fly. POLLEN JOCK:

• Sure is. BARRY: Between you and me, I was dying to get out of that office. (Barry recreates the scene near the beginning of the movie where he flies through the box kite. The movie fades to black and the credits being) [--after credits; No scene can be seen but the characters can be heard talking over the credits--] You have got to start thinking bee, my friend! :
• Thinking bee!
• Me? BARRY: (Talking over singer) Hold it. Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. : I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Can we stop here? SINGER: Oh, BarryBARRY: I'm not making a major life decision during a production number! SINGER: All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up, guys. BARRY: I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

Miss a day, miss a lot. Subscribe to The Defender's Top News of the Day. It's free.
In this 40-minute video, Reiner Fuellmich and his associate Viviane Fischer, attorneys and founding members of the German Corona Investigative Committee, interview an unidentified whistleblower at a nursing home in Berlin, Germany.
The whistleblower, a caregiver, describes what happened at the care facility during and after the rollout of COVID-19 vaccines. The whistleblower’s voice has been distorted to protect the individual’s identity and is in German with English subtitles.
The whistleblower describes how seven of 31 nursing home residents with dementia died after the first dose of the Pfizer vaccine, and an eighth was near death at the time the interview was recorded.
After the second dose, 11 more residents became seriously ill and one more died.
In other words, 25% of the residents died immediately, and 36% were severely injured within a short time.
The video contains de-identified footage from the nursing home, where a team of three or four people, including a soldier in uniform, vaccinate residents, in many cases using force. The footage is troubling as it shows some people resisting the shots, being vaccinated nonetheless.
Fischer has filed a complaint on behalf of the whistleblower with prosecutors and the police. They seek an investigation by law enforcement and publicity about this information to halt further deaths.
An investigation into the deaths at this particular nursing home won’t be the first investigation into deaths among the elderly in care facilities, after being vaccinated with a COVID vaccine — there have been many reports of elderly people dying after the vaccines.
In January, officials in Norway and Germany said they were looking into deaths following the vaccine. Last month, in Spain, officials temporarily halted vaccines after 46 nursing home residents died after getting the vaccine.
The Global Times reported last week that 16 elderly people in Switzerland died following COVID vaccinations.
In the U.S., according to the latest available data from the Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System, the average age of those who died following COVID vaccines is 77.8.
Children’s Health Defense is working closely with Fuellmich and his associates at the German Corona Investigative Committee to seek information and justice regarding COVID-19.

I personally believe that Pride is too vague a concept. What's even more annoying is when people use the sin of pride as a shot against lgbtq+ pride and pride month.
So, I propose that Pride should be split up into two separate sins.
Vanity: Caring too much about your personal Looks and appearance that you don't spend enough time actually being a good person, which is seen as being prideful of your outer form. The patron demon of this sin would be Lilith.
Hubris: thinking that you are better than God, which is seen as being prideful of your inner form. Patron demon of this sin would be Lucifer, because he saw himself as being better than God.

Support the story on Nosleep Here.
My father was not a good man, I know this. But when I think of him, I first recall his warmth, his kindness, and his strength. I remember vividly watching him toil away at backbreaking labor to support us. I was amazed by the strength of his hands, and how gentle they were with me. And then my stomach drops into a pit because now I know that with those same hands, he took the lives of countless innocent people.
My earliest memory is of him. I was 4 and I was trying to convince him to let me take in a stray dog I had found wandering an abandoned lot.
“We can’t, it’d be too much trouble to lug the mutt around, we have a hard enough time with just the two of us.” He said.
“We can leave him with lots of food until we come back,” I countered.
“Dogs aren’t like people, they’re bound by instinct. If you leave a month's worth of food out for a dog it won’t ration its food out so that it can eat happily for a month, no it’ll gorge itself and eat all the food available to it, that’s its nature, its instinct. And once there’s nothing left and hunger creeps in it might go out into the world in search of a new meal, and we’ve already learned that its instinct is to consume as much as it can while it can. That’s why we’re around, to control that which is bestial.” He said, his eyes tainted with an existential melancholy.
Even now when I think about it a trickle of cold sweat crawls achingly slow down the side of my brow, he was so close to telling me the truth back then. I wondered if the possibility of passing on his burden was what caused the derailment of his life lesson.
Our life was unconventional, spent in countless cheap, dirty roadside motels as we trekked aimlessly through the states. Sometimes we slept in abandoned lots and dark parking lots and on cold nights we clung to each other, knowing that there was no one else in the world that would care for us, but us. He tried his best to provide for me and I never went hungry, even on our worst days his patience and understanding were unmatched by any man I have known sense.
The first time I suspected my father was involved in something grisly was when I was 9. He had left me alone in our motel with the TV on and a pizza box. He must have been gone for 11 hours at least, and I began to worry that something terrible happened to him. The entire week something had been off, there was a heaviness in the air, and a chill seemed to stalk us. It was the middle of a brutal summer but every enclosed space I found myself in was wicked of its heat until the very breaths I exhaled were visible. I noticed that my father was suffering from some mental fatigue, was more irritable than usual, and had a mounting nervousness that made him quick to sequester us in our hotel. He left that day saying that there was something he needed to do but promised he’d be back. But as the clock neared 1 am I was afraid that I’d never see him again.
The relief I felt when he rushed into our hotel room was short-lived when I saw the state he was in. His dark hair was disheveled, splattered with a slick substance, and his eyes were crazed. What stood out most of all was the angry red lines criss-crossing his face and neck. He told me to get my things as he quickly made his way into the shower. I did as I was told, the panicked tone of his voice infused a frenzy into my movements, and all I owned was half haphazardly thrown into my backpack. My father stepped out of the shower and as he dressed I noticed the deep scratches raked into his forearms and back, even at that age it was unmistakable. Violence.
We drove away from that motel in silence, with no alarm or danger given voice by my father. But an undeniable sense of wrongness lingered in the air, heavy and undispellable, I knew deep in the pit of my gut that we had committed some great evil. Dad however was at ease, as if some great weight had just been lifted off his shoulders, and as days passed I noticed the stalking cold had faded.
3 years passed and I had smartened up by then and as I began to recall and re-examine, I began to piece things together. Through the layers of denial and rationalization, I knew what he had done. I held on to the hope that the motel incident was the last time, that we could move forward and with time, forget. And then he killed Morgan. There was a build-up to it, that same strange chill, the sense of impending doom, and then Dad left like he always did, and when he came back the stalking specter was gone and so was Morgan. I didn’t know him, couldn’t bring myself to even look into him even now. I only caught wind of him through a radio broadcast as we hastily left yet another small town. My dad quickly switched stations and I knew it had been him. I think he knew that I knew then, the nervousness in both our eyes communicating more between us than we’d ever could with words.
I took part in my first murder at 15. It wasn’t planned, wasn’t a rite of passage. It was more like a car crash, flying at 120 miles per hour straight into the embankment. Her name was Laurie Artwood, a local prostitute. I forced myself to look this time even if it was a glance at a driver's license moments before it was tossed into flames. Her name, her face, all seared into the flesh of my mind. It was the moment she stepped out bloodied and starry-eyed as a curtain of blood cascaded down the side of her head. A flap of flesh dangled loosely from her scalp, weighed and dragged down by curly auburn hair. As we locked eyes and hope flushed into her iris I looked away and saw the crimson-slicked and chipped exposed skull. She screamed then and I flinched and doubled back at her, seeing the desperate sprint she made towards the car I had been sleeping in. Dad closed the distance, spriting on long powerful legs, the glint of a deadly metal arc flashing briefly in the moonlight before he brought the ax down with a powerful and meaty THWACK
I saw the light leave her eyes as the floor rushed up to meet her. Dad pried the ax loose with a foot and brought it down thrice more. I watched in horror, spewing vomit and tears as a blood rain coated the floor and car. I was comatose by the time he finally entered the driver's seat, the crazed look from 6 years earlier was mirrored and I knew he had always been like this. He chanted “fuck” under his breath, like a mantra as he scrambled to start the car and when the engine roared to life silence fell like a guillotine. We drove off into the night and I was left with the knowledge that I had killed her with my inaction.
Dawn was starting to peek through the horizon when we finally came to some unnamed backwater town with a self-serve car wash. I watched as Dad fed the machine a handful of quarters and proceeded to wash the car clean. The cold spray made the bitter morning cold all the harsher, and with each passing moment, I felt the question, the demand bubbling up inside me.
“Why?” I asked, quietly.
It cleaved through the whir and sound of pressurized water and Dad heard it, turned to face me, and said “Soon.” so we waited until the water ran clear and the sun rose and off we drove to some far-flung forest edge where he pulled over. A cigarette was lit and Dad took a long drag until his lungs hurt and he couldn’t hold it any longer. He breathed the plume of smoke out painting the world gray and held out the cigarette to me and I answered with a contemptuous glare.
“Alright, I guess it’s time you knew. You’d find out sooner or later, this thing will pass on to you eventually,” he said.
“Thing?”
“You’ve felt it before, I’m sure you have. The way it hungers, the way it loathes, and the way it schemes.”
“What are you talking about?” I asked but in the pit of my stomach, I had an inkling of what he meant.
He reached out and for a moment I froze, but this was my Dad, he wouldn’t hurt me, couldn’t. So I let him take hold of my shoulders and turn me to face the sunrise.
“If it’s here, it means they haven’t found her body yet, you can’t see it by looking through your eyes. Think of what you have and what you’ve lost. What I’ve taken from you because I couldn’t bear the thought of doing this alone.”
I did, I could have had a normal life, friends, a family, first love. Anything but this vagrant lifestyle, knowing the person you cherished the most was a monster and having him drag you into his hell. And then I felt the sting of tears in my eyes, a longing blossoming and the crushing weight of its existence.
“Now show yourself,” he said
And in the glow of the morning sun, it did. I didn’t know if the thing was malformed or degraded, just that it didn’t belong. Multiple forms convened and interlaced within the same space, upon a glance it was a human silhouette, weaved in shadow. But in that same instance, it was a cuboid thing, far too large for the space it existed in, its surface pocked and scarred by clockwork machinery, passages, and labyrinthian tunnels. It was constantly turning, shifting, and restructuring, I didn’t know where to look. If I focused on its maze-like circuitry I would lose myself in the maddening scramble to navigate them. And if I saw the black of its being I would that beneath it all was a maw that opened wide and lapped hungrily at the world around it, feeding on something that still evaded me.
I tried to recoil, tried to move away from it but Dad caught me and held me firm, forcing me to gaze into the thing. Its once semi-translucent form grew vivid and real, solidifying its existence. A cloud of black smoke was being pulled from me into the hungry maws of its shadow self and in turn the machinery and clockworks of its exterior. It was devouring some part of me and it horrified me enough to try to turn and run but Dad’s firm hands held me still as he spoke.
“I think it might have had a purpose at one point, to lessen the weight of some great tragedy. But with time even blessings can become curses. I don’t know why it latched onto us, whether it was born or made, just that it needs to feed. And if we don’t feed it and control its urges, it might go out into the world and gorge itself on the grief it brings. The knowledge that I’m sparing the world from the havoc it could wreck is my sin and burden, and now… yours.”
I stood transfixed, gaze locked on the thing that fed on grief and stalked our bloodline and then it came to me, a question I had pondered but never voiced.
“What happened to Mom?”
I turned to face him and saw him drowning in pain, in guilt, in remorse. He looked away, and I knew. The world spun as bile threatened to force its way up. My lip quivered as I turned away, preferring to face the grief-devouring demon. But it had already faded to a phantasm, a moment later nothing remained.
“They found her.” was all my father said before he got back in the car. The moment of hesitation dragged out for what felt like an eternity but eventually, I was in the passenger seat alongside him, wondering how long this thing would be able to feed on the grief my father wrought that night before he’d have to do it again.
2 years, 2 short years before the grief demon manifested again. I understood now, why it stuck close to us, why no suspicion ever came to us. It was a parasite, leeching from whoever it could with the least amount of effort. I tried telling dad if we let it starve it would go somewhere else, but he feared the lengths it would to feed itself.
“The world is drowning in pain, there’s no shortage of ways for it to gorge itself,” I told him.
“I can’t risk that, no one should suffer this, no one but me,” and he was off, searching for his next victim, unaware it was the last time we’d see each other.
He never found them, not that night. When he returned to the motel he found it empty. I took what I had and caught a bus to anywhere else, and kept going until I no longer could. The monstrous thing followed me for a night but when I greeted the following dawn it was gone and I knew Dad was the one grieving. The lump in my heart wasn’t heavy enough to turn my pace, I kept moving because it was all I could do. I found a job as a laborer, taking whatever anyone was willing to give me and for two years I broke my back scrounging change for nothing. Half a year ago I came home to my shitty apartment, opening the door I was greeted by a bone-deep chill and I froze. In the center of the room upon a thrifted coffee table it stood, crouched itself. The labyrinthian clockwork had slowed to a crawl and their underlying hungry mouths lapped up at the empty air. Some of them grinned at me, expectantly.
A scream tried to tear its way up my body but it was drowned out by something else, a smoldering emotion on the verge of catching flame. As the implication of the demon’s appearance settled in I felt it, grief. And then I cried, I cried for all I had lost and for what I never had. I cried, hoping to drown a space within me that grew with every second. As I collapsed into myself as the mechanisms of this thing unwound and opened and encircled me. The maws bit down deep on the flames of my pain and I drowned in the crushing weight of its presence, suffocated by my fire and its hunger. I was immobilized by it at first, as it fed on the grief cultivated over a lifetime. Days passed, then weeks, and then a month before a moment of clarity. A burden eased and I sought him out. Claimed his body and did what I could. It wasn’t much but the tiny urn they gave me could at least be carried until I found the courage to let him go.
I’ve carried them ever since. Their weight is great and some days I buckle and fall but I know that with each passing day, it gets easier, even if only a little. It won’t ever fade completely, I know that, but one day it’ll be ok. I’ll climb to his favorite cliffside, one that overlooked a redwood forest and there I’ll toss our burdens to the wind, let them be scattered, and be returned to the earth. The demon might stick around a bit longer, maybe much longer than anticipated. But I won’t let it be my cross to bear. I don’t know what it’ll do. Maybe it’ll latch onto someone else, maybe it will coast through the world feeding on the suffering as it passes them. Maybe Dad was right and it’ll gorge on the whole of the world’s grief until it can’t. Somehow I doubt that, not through any logical reasoning but because it’s what I have to believe if I want to live with myself. The only thing I know is that I’ll keep trudging forward until I can’t.
TW

My father was not a good man, I know this. But when I think of him, I first recall his warmth, his kindness, and his strength. I remember vividly watching him toil away at backbreaking labor to support us. I was amazed by the strength of his hands, and how gentle they were with me. And then my stomach drops into a pit because now I know that with those same hands, he took the lives of countless innocent people.
My earliest memory is of him. I was 4 and I was trying to convince him to let me take in a stray dog I had found wandering an abandoned lot.
“We can’t, it’d be too much trouble to lug the mutt around, we have a hard enough time with just the two of us.” He said.
“We can leave him with lots of food until we come back,” I countered.
“Dogs aren’t like people, they’re bound by instinct. If you leave a month's worth of food out for a dog it won’t ration its food out so that it can eat happily for a month, no it’ll gorge itself and eat all the food available to it, that’s its nature, its instinct. And once there’s nothing left and hunger creeps in it might go out into the world in search of a new meal, and we’ve already learned that its instinct is to consume as much as it can while it can. That’s why we’re around, to control that which is bestial.” He said, his eyes tainted with an existential melancholy.
Even now when I think about it a trickle of cold sweat crawls achingly slow down the side of my brow, he was so close to telling me the truth back then. I wondered if the possibility of passing on his burden was what caused the derailment of his life lesson.
Our life was unconventional, spent in countless cheap, dirty roadside motels as we trekked aimlessly through the states. Sometimes we slept in abandoned lots and dark parking lots and on cold nights we clung to each other, knowing that there was no one else in the world that would care for us, but us. He tried his best to provide for me and I never went hungry, even on our worst days his patience and understanding were unmatched by any man I have known sense.
The first time I suspected my father was involved in something grisly was when I was 9. He had left me alone in our motel with the TV on and a pizza box. He must have been gone for 11 hours at least, and I began to worry that something terrible happened to him. The entire week something had been off, there was a heaviness in the air, and a chill seemed to stalk us. It was the middle of a brutal summer but every enclosed space I found myself in was wicked of its heat until the very breaths I exhaled were visible. I noticed that my father was suffering from some mental fatigue, was more irritable than usual, and had a mounting nervousness that made him quick to sequester us in our hotel. He left that day saying that there was something he needed to do but promised he’d be back. But as the clock neared 1 am I was afraid that I’d never see him again.
The relief I felt when he rushed into our hotel room was short-lived when I saw the state he was in. His dark hair was disheveled, splattered with a slick substance, and his eyes were crazed. What stood out most of all was the angry red lines criss-crossing his face and neck. He told me to get my things as he quickly made his way into the shower. I did as I was told, the panicked tone of his voice infused a frenzy into my movements, and all I owned was half haphazardly thrown into my backpack. My father stepped out of the shower and as he dressed I noticed the deep scratches raked into his forearms and back, even at that age it was unmistakable. Violence.
We drove away from that motel in silence, with no alarm or danger given voice by my father. But an undeniable sense of wrongness lingered in the air, heavy and undispellable, I knew deep in the pit of my gut that we had committed some great evil. Dad however was at ease, as if some great weight had just been lifted off his shoulders, and as days passed I noticed the stalking cold had faded.
3 years passed and I had smartened up by then and as I began to recall and re-examine, I began to piece things together. Through the layers of denial and rationalization, I knew what he had done. I held on to the hope that the motel incident was the last time, that we could move forward and with time, forget. And then he killed Morgan. There was a build-up to it, that same strange chill, the sense of impending doom, and then Dad left like he always did, and when he came back the stalking specter was gone and so was Morgan. I didn’t know him, couldn’t bring myself to even look into him even now. I only caught wind of him through a radio broadcast as we hastily left yet another small town. My dad quickly switched stations and I knew it had been him. I think he knew that I knew then, the nervousness in both our eyes communicating more between us than we’d ever could with words.
I took part in my first murder at 15. It wasn’t planned, wasn’t a rite of passage. It was more like a car crash, flying at 120 miles per hour straight into the embankment. Her name was Laurie Artwood, a local prostitute. I forced myself to look this time even if it was a glance at a driver's license moments before it was tossed into flames. Her name, her face, all seared into the flesh of my mind. It was the moment she stepped out bloodied and starry-eyed as a curtain of blood cascaded down the side of her head. A flap of flesh dangled loosely from her scalp, weighed and dragged down by curly auburn hair. As we locked eyes and hope flushed into her iris I looked away and saw the crimson-slicked and chipped exposed skull. She screamed then and I flinched and doubled back at her, seeing the desperate sprint she made towards the car I had been sleeping in. Dad closed the distance, spriting on long powerful legs, the glint of a deadly metal arc flashing briefly in the moonlight before he brought the ax down with a powerful and meaty THWACK
I saw the light leave her eyes as the floor rushed up to meet her. Dad pried the ax loose with a foot and brought it down thrice more. I watched in horror, spewing vomit and tears as a blood rain coated the floor and car. I was comatose by the time he finally entered the driver's seat, the crazed look from 6 years earlier was mirrored and I knew he had always been like this. He chanted “fuck” under his breath, like a mantra as he scrambled to start the car and when the engine roared to life silence fell like a guillotine. We drove off into the night and I was left with the knowledge that I had killed her with my inaction.
Dawn was starting to peek through the horizon when we finally came to some unnamed backwater town with a self-serve car wash. I watched as Dad fed the machine a handful of quarters and proceeded to wash the car clean. The cold spray made the bitter morning cold all the harsher, and with each passing moment, I felt the question, the demand bubbling up inside me.
“Why?” I asked, quietly.
It cleaved through the whir and sound of pressurized water and Dad heard it, turned to face me, and said “Soon.” so we waited until the water ran clear and the sun rose and off we drove to some far-flung forest edge where he pulled over. A cigarette was lit and Dad took a long drag until his lungs hurt and he couldn’t hold it any longer. He breathed the plume of smoke out painting the world gray and held out the cigarette to me and I answered with a contemptuous glare.
“Alright, I guess it’s time you knew. You’d find out sooner or later, this thing will pass on to you eventually,” he said.
“Thing?”
“You’ve felt it before, I’m sure you have. The way it hungers, the way it loathes, and the way it schemes.”
“What are you talking about?” I asked but in the pit of my stomach, I had an inkling of what he meant.
He reached out and for a moment I froze, but this was my Dad, he wouldn’t hurt me, couldn’t. So I let him take hold of my shoulders and turn me to face the sunrise.
“If it’s here, it means they haven’t found her body yet, you can’t see it by looking through your eyes. Think of what you have and what you’ve lost. What I’ve taken from you because I couldn’t bear the thought of doing this alone.”
I did, I could have had a normal life, friends, a family, first love. Anything but this vagrant lifestyle, knowing the person you cherished the most was a monster and having him drag you into his hell. And then I felt the sting of tears in my eyes, a longing blossoming and the crushing weight of its existence.
“Now show yourself,” he said
And in the glow of the morning sun, it did. I didn’t know if the thing was malformed or degraded, just that it didn’t belong. Multiple forms convened and interlaced within the same space, upon a glance it was a human silhouette, weaved in shadow. But in that same instance, it was a cuboid thing, far too large for the space it existed in, its surface pocked and scarred by clockwork machinery, passages, and labyrinthian tunnels. It was constantly turning, shifting, and restructuring, I didn’t know where to look. If I focused on its maze-like circuitry I would lose myself in the maddening scramble to navigate them. And if I saw the black of its being I would that beneath it all was a maw that opened wide and lapped hungrily at the world around it, feeding on something that still evaded me.
I tried to recoil, tried to move away from it but Dad caught me and held me firm, forcing me to gaze into the thing. Its once semi-translucent form grew vivid and real, solidifying its existence. A cloud of black smoke was being pulled from me into the hungry maws of its shadow self and in turn the machinery and clockworks of its exterior. It was devouring some part of me and it horrified me enough to try to turn and run but Dad’s firm hands held me still as he spoke.
“I think it might have had a purpose at one point, to lessen the weight of some great tragedy. But with time even blessings can become curses. I don’t know why it latched onto us, whether it was born or made, just that it needs to feed. And if we don’t feed it and control its urges, it might go out into the world and gorge itself on the grief it brings. The knowledge that I’m sparing the world from the havoc it could wreck is my sin and burden, and now… yours.”
I stood transfixed, gaze locked on the thing that fed on grief and stalked our bloodline and then it came to me, a question I had pondered but never voiced.
“What happened to Mom?”
I turned to face him and saw him drowning in pain, in guilt, in remorse. He looked away, and I knew. The world spun as bile threatened to force its way up. My lip quivered as I turned away, preferring to face the grief-devouring demon. But it had already faded to a phantasm, a moment later nothing remained.
“They found her.” was all my father said before he got back in the car. The moment of hesitation dragged out for what felt like an eternity but eventually, I was in the passenger seat alongside him, wondering how long this thing would be able to feed on the grief my father wrought that night before he’d have to do it again.
2 years, 2 short years before the grief demon manifested again. I understood now, why it stuck close to us, why no suspicion ever came to us. It was a parasite, leeching from whoever it could with the least amount of effort. I tried telling dad if we let it starve it would go somewhere else, but he feared the lengths it would to feed itself.
“The world is drowning in pain, there’s no shortage of ways for it to gorge itself,” I told him.
“I can’t risk that, no one should suffer this, no one but me,” and he was off, searching for his next victim, unaware it was the last time we’d see each other.
He never found them, not that night. When he returned to the motel he found it empty. I took what I had and caught a bus to anywhere else, and kept going until I no longer could. The monstrous thing followed me for a night but when I greeted the following dawn it was gone and I knew Dad was the one grieving. The lump in my heart wasn’t heavy enough to turn my pace, I kept moving because it was all I could do. I found a job as a laborer, taking whatever anyone was willing to give me and for two years I broke my back scrounging change for nothing. Half a year ago I came home to my shitty apartment, opening the door I was greeted by a bone-deep chill and I froze. In the center of the room upon a thrifted coffee table it stood, crouched itself. The labyrinthian clockwork had slowed to a crawl and their underlying hungry mouths lapped up at the empty air. Some of them grinned at me, expectantly.
A scream tried to tear its way up my body but it was drowned out by something else, a smoldering emotion on the verge of catching flame. As the implication of the demon’s appearance settled in I felt it, grief. And then I cried, I cried for all I had lost and for what I never had. I cried, hoping to drown a space within me that grew with every second. As I collapsed into myself as the mechanisms of this thing unwound and opened and encircled me. The maws bit down deep on the flames of my pain and I drowned in the crushing weight of its presence, suffocated by my fire and its hunger. I was immobilized by it at first, as it fed on the grief cultivated over a lifetime. Days passed, then weeks, and then a month before a moment of clarity. A burden eased and I sought him out. Claimed his body and did what I could. It wasn’t much but the tiny urn they gave me could at least be carried until I found the courage to let him go.
I’ve carried them ever since. Their weight is great and some days I buckle and fall but I know that with each passing day, it gets easier, even if only a little. It won’t ever fade completely, I know that, but one day it’ll be ok. I’ll climb to his favorite cliffside, one that overlooked a redwood forest and there I’ll toss our burdens to the wind, let them be scattered, and be returned to the earth. The demon might stick around a bit longer, maybe much longer than anticipated. But I won’t let it be my cross to bear. I don’t know what it’ll do. Maybe it’ll latch onto someone else, maybe it will coast through the world feeding on the suffering as it passes them. Maybe Dad was right and it’ll gorge on the whole of the world’s grief until it can’t. Somehow I doubt that, not through any logical reasoning but because it’s what I have to believe if I want to live with myself. The only thing I know is that I’ll keep trudging forward until I can’t.
TW

Deadhouse Gates

This is it! The infamous make-or-break point for so many readers of the series, GotM was fun, but the REAL Book of the Fallen starts here! So they say, and so I'm here to find out and report so to you all! Thus far, I feel the series is already "made" but let's see where it goes. Interestingly, we've only got four books this time, while maintaining the 24-chapter structure, so that'll be interesting. But enough preamble, let the ignorant rambling on context-less supplemental content commence!

Maps

So, we've got double the map content this time around, with three double-page maps depicting a large portion of the Seven Cities Continent, at roughly the same time as GotM's map.
The first is that broad overview. Interestingly, we don't have a map key this time around, so the territories are unmarked. That somewhat tracks, as my understanding of the timeline has 7C mostly or completely conquered by this time, although on the knife's edge of rebellion by the end of GotM. IDK if I love the addition of waves to the bodies of water, although that might have been because of the much more intermixed water-land-water-land nature of the land mass. Disambiguation and all that. It does add quite a bit of visual clutter though.
What jumps out right away is the inclusion of the "Otataral Desert" and the "Otataral Sea." We knew 7C was where the bulk of the Otataral came from, but now we've got a rough region for that.* On another note, Y'ghatan is absent from the map. While that again makes sense, considering it got nuked off the face of the continent, and Laseen's Malazan isn't likely to commemorate either military embarrassments or the past it would be interesting to know where that was once located. Either way, lots of cool sounding and cool-looking places on here. Also, I'll note that this landmass seems to be north of Quon Tali, just to get a sense of geography.
*As an aside, given what we know about Otataral exposure, I'd love to know the effects it has on the miners.
Next up is a pair of double-spread maps on Cotaline's Chain of Dogs march. Similar to Anomander Rake, whatever that sequence entails, even in the spoiler-free, noob intros, and fan recruitment content out there, the Chain of Dogs is one of those things that is inevitably namedropped, so I'm hyped to see that here. It seems to be one long march from some place called Hissar down to a Holy City named Aren. There seem to be no less than eight battles along the way, as well as a series of minor engagements, something called The Dry March, and a whole bunch of surrounding hostiles. So yea, sounds like we're in for a brutal time. Also of note on these two maps are what seem to be a series of... mounds? All named, with what look like caravan trails all named as well interconnecting them. Local settlements, perhaps? Are these tels)? The general aesthetic of the setting just seems suggestive of such, and with Erikson as an archeologist...
Anyway, I'll let those settle in my mind and move on. On the whole, I probably prefer GotM's Genebakis map to the Seven Cities map here, but I love the Chain of Dogs maps and am excited to use those to follow along.

Dramatis Personae

Not spoilers cuz it's listed first! Also, this tells us nothing about how involved anyone is, just that they'll show up. Also, given how conservative GotM's DP was, I't'll be fine. We've got Icarium and Mappo, two of the guys mentioned in the tail end of GotM, so I'm excited to learn more about them as well as a High Preist of Shadow. Possibly Ben's replacement? We've also got a Souletaken and a couple of D'ivers (which GotM's Glossary mentioned as another type of shapeshifter but IDR if they ever came up there) all of these are connected with something called the Path of Hands.
Among the Malazans we have our prologue trio, as well as the quartet who left Darujhistan for Quon Tali, interesting that they're passing through here. I don't notice anyone else from Malazan who I'd recognize, aside from Topper. Tavore, despite her new role, is conspicuously absent. Or I'm just blind and missed her. We got some more interesting group names, like Wiccans (among whom is listed Coltaine, despite their being the Fist of the 7th) The Red Blades, and the Followers of the Apocalypse. It also seems like House Shadow is making another appearance. One last note, Moby is not listed with our Darujhistan crew, but that may just be a technicality.
A pair of someones named Irp and Rudd are listed as "a small servant" and "an equally small servant" so there's either a joke or a major revelation there, probably both.

Prologue

Oh yea, we've stepped up the game in the prose department. Exquisite, and also horrifying. A look into the events in the capital during the months after the events of GotM. Things... don't look great.

Epigraph

As an aside, the format changed for the epigraphs to where the Chapter number and epigraphs are listed immediately before the text. Probably for the best, but that might limit the length of future epigraphs. Not good or bad, just a thing.
Another excerpt from The Bridgeburners by Toc the Younger. I'd forgotten to mention this during my GotM finale, but unless Toc has already written this, there are some shenanigans going on with his "death."
Something looms big on the horizon, that's... really all I can get out of this. The reference to "the horizon's bruised smear" seems to indicate a storm, but as to what's in the storm, or what this has to do with the Bridgeburners outside of the Paran connection, I'm not sure. Perhaps that is it, Ganoes' actions have had massive consequences for many others.

The Prologue Itself

Takes place the same year as GotM, ominously listed as the Year of the Cull. A figure covered in flies stumbles into Judgement's Round in Unta. As is tradition, the Season of Rot's ending is celebrated by the priests of Hood coating themselves in the fermented blood of executed murderers and attracting the many files brought on by death.* I'd initially thought we'd time jumped ahead to when autumn passes into winter, given R'rek's whole motif, but the assertion that this has only happened three times in the last decade, and that's a record, means that this is likely something else. Either supernatural or just a measure of the passage of plagues. Either way, just another crack in the foundation of the Empire.
*For some reason, my brain substituted blood for feces on the initial readthrough so... the Death cult could always be worse, right? Also, blood fits better with the whole Thirsting Hour name, lol.
This is all observed through the eyes of Felesin Paran, sister to Ganoes and author (to be?) of A Call to Shadow. She is in chains, surrounded by death, and lined up for slavery if an execution by mob does not kill her first. She watches with horror as the priest stumbles in her direction, dancing the tens of thousands of eyes to be fixed on her. In truth, they are fixated on the former priest of Fenner to her left. The two trade snark as the priest continues to stumble towards Heboric. It is then that Felesin recognizes the boar tattoos all over the man, marking him as among the priesthood of Fenner. She also notices that both of his hands have been cut off. The ex-priest mocks the figure before the flies themselves respond. There is a secret to be shared by them. To the horror of all present, the flies scatter, and the priest underneath... is nonexistent. Hood is evidently borrowing tactics from popular superhero web serials written in 2011. What the secret revealed actually means, none (myself included) can yet guess.
Reflecting on the Cull, Felisin bemoans her changing station in life and all the implications that such a thing has happened now. For us in the audience, it reveals just how desperate the Empress is growing. Culling the nobility is the Empire's MO to recruit soldiers for their war engine, as well as general appeasement and power brokering. That they need to do so once again in the interior, all across the Empire's heartland, betrays just how much the Empress has lost between Genebakis and Seven Cities.. Someone calls Felesion for help, a Lady of another noble family who recognizes her. She baggs Felesin to reason with her sister, calling her out by name as a Paran, offering riches to spare the woman's life. The Thug to Fellesin's left (or right? she must have turned around at some point) quiets the woman by noting that all who could pay the girl off are in this same line, with their assets seized as well. He mentions his name as Baudin, and declares that no mob of peasants will tear him apart. Heboric speculates that there is something personal in Tavore's inclusion of Felesin in the Cull, and his admission of being a thief, then priest, then historian tips the girl and thug off to his identity. Heboric Light Touch, a historian outlawed and sentenced to this fate due to his scathing representation of the Emperess. Felesin states that they'd "differed in opinions" resulting in the two separate fates, one the Adjunct and Lorn's heir, the other in chains. They see Tavore, leading a gang of some guards and a group known as the Red Blades, officiating the proceedings. I don't have much to say on them aside from shelving away the passing reference of the Red Blades as "bloodless" and their ties to somewhere called the sea walls of Aren. (the Holy City at the end of the CoD, if I remember) It seems Tavore was also responsible for their mother's death, and someone named T'amber has taken up Ganoes old job.
Man, Parans are just built different it seems.
Heboric muses not only on being right about the Empress, but on predicting her next moves. As Machiavelli has taught us, tyrants are predictable. The nobles were caught unawares, dragged through a mockery of justice and civility, all to prepare them as desperately tempting targets for the "unsanctioned" mob outside. Bring them to their lowest, so the city's underbelly may reach to drag them further still. Laseen even took the opportunity to round up malcontents such as Heboric himself. eyeing the Adjunct, he can get no read on the mind within her wiry frame. He marches grimly on, internally invoking his old goddess.
As the hour and violence wear on, Felisin disassociates, beaten and spat upon, clothes wholly torn away despite Heboric and Baudin's protection, she observes the horror at arm's length. Baudin, for his part, is an unholy terror, using nothing but the brute language of deterrence to save himself. He's virtually playing to the crowd in some incomprehensibly barbaric way. Nose smashed, ear torn off, he marches on. Soon, what little farce of protection they had received from the guards is overwhelmed, and the crowd presses in for real. Barring teeth, biting and clawing, Baudin gains enough space and time to bellow into the crowd, offering a deal. A show of blood, for passage. In a horrifyingly graphic display, he breaks Lady Gaeseen's neck and saws off her head with their chains. The crowd shrinks back, the guards shrink back, Felisin and Heboric shrink back, I shrink back, and they move on, no time to deal with the barbarity witnessed. By the end, a third of the prisoners remain, most of the dead torn apart by the crowds. Heboric calls out the thug for his brutality but it is the girl's pleading voice, shivering and exposed, that moves him. He subdues, for now. As they board slave ships bound for Aren, Felesin contemplates how her suffering has just begun.
So that's it. A display of humanity at its worst, whipped up by both civilization and barbarity. Desperate and cruel calculus, or else dumb luck, is what will save people. From the disgusting rituals of Hood to the shocking acts of Baudin, here is a moment of black darkness. Genuinely difficult to read and then recap. But worse has happened, and actively is as I write and you read this. Such is life when stability falters and men turn to gratification. Well, Deadhouse Gates has been broached, so now I guess all that remains is to see where and when we'll turn up in the story proper, and how that will all unfold...

Author note: The Cryopod to Hell is a Reddit-exclusive story with over three years of editing and refining. As of this post, the total rewrite is 1,940,000+ words long! For more information, check out the link below:
What is the Cryopod to Hell?
Join the Cryoverse Discord server!
Here's a list of all Cryopod's chapters, along with an ePub/Mobi/PDF version!
Want to stay up to date on TCTH? Subscribe to Cryopodbot!
...................................
(Previous Part)
(Part 001)
...
After every Demon Duke pops one of Glinch's pills, they begin to evolve. The change shocks the Emperors to their cores. Yardrat prepared himself for the inevitability that these incredible pills would do the unthinkable, but seeing it happen in real-time is very different from imagining the concept in his head.
He and the other leaders, movers, and shakers of the Four Hells who came along can only watch numbly as Vespera, Rhesus, Hamir, Vepar, and all the other Dukes explode in strength, smashing through their limiters to ascend to the realm of Demon Emperor.
Their bodies glow with power. They fall to their knees and roar to the heavens, delighted in achieving that which they previously thought was unattainable.
In an instant, the balance of power across every Hell shifts, yet few even know of that which has just transpired, and fewer still take the time to think clearly about what this will surely mean in the coming days, weeks, months, and years.
If they cannot defeat Mephisto, it won't matter if they have six Emperors or six hundred. The power of a Demon Deity will crush them all into dust, with nothing left behind, aside from their dying screams.
As for the fifty newly ascended Emperors, their names and titles are numerous, almost numbing to dwell on. Among them are a smattering of renowned individuals, such as:
Vepar, the Corrosive Emperor.
Vespera, the Emperor of Nebulae.
Rhesus, the Emperor of Ripping.
Hamir, the Emperor of Tempests.
As well as numerous others.
The moment they ascend, their titles become known to all demons who gaze upon them. They need not speak these titles, as if having been named directly by the Creator himself. In the entire history of demonkind, few have managed to shroud their true names, the most notable individual being Gressil, who hid his Emperor-level strength until the time was right for others to know.
But these newly risen Emperors have neither a need nor a desire to hide their powerful new titles. They look at one another and grin evilly, excited to begin wielding their abilities as soon as possible.
After distributing half of the pills, Yardrat finds that he still has more than forty left. He turns to Emperor Melody.
"It wouldn't be appropriate for me to hold onto the rest." He says. "My Hell already has more elites than everyone else. If we make it out of here alive, rebuild the Hell of Isolation with these."
The other Emperors blink in surprise at Yardrat's gesture of goodwill. Some of them feel it's a bit of a waste, but the longest lived Emperors and former Dukes ultimately don't bother to interrupt him.
Bael crosses his arms and nods.
"Good call, Yardy-boy. That's what Shax would want."
"Shax was a fine demon." Yardrat says, as Melody takes the pills from him. "His death has always weighed on my mind. If I can help his Hell with a small gesture like this, then I'll do so without thinking twice."
"Thank you." Melody says quietly, looking at Yardrat with a strange gaze. She pockets the pills and sighs.
Shax wasn't just a cool music-loving dude, but a kind demon who made countless friends. He never attacked or fought anybody undeservedly, and he based his Hell on the principles of friendship and cooperation. Even the demons who might not have gotten along with him still respected him. His death to the humans ruined the morale of many demons at the time.
"Don't thank me until we kill Mephisto and leave here alive." Yardrat says, turning his attention to the distant center of the Stitched wasteland. "Everyone, let's move out. And remember, those pills were not for our benefit. This is where the real fight begins."
The others nod grimly. They begin marching toward Glinch's lair, and as they walk, powerful chimera cross their paths at regular intervals. No longer do only two or three of Glinch's minions appear, but instead five and six at a time, each and every individual far too powerful for mere Emperors to defeat alone. They quickly get the impression Glinch has managed to raise entities capable of challenging 5th and perhaps even 6th-Level Psions.
With nearly sixty Emperors on their side, the swarm of demons begins moving forward with great haste.
Yardrat imbues his body with the power of space. He flickers around to deal massive damage to Glinch's chimera with punches that rip across dimensional spaces.
Fae flies into the air and rains bombs from above. She takes the initiative to attack distant enemies with her strongest bombs, weakening and softening them up for her allies to take on later.
Dagon and Vepar work together. With both of their powers having reached the bottom of the Emperor-level in strength, they melt, corrode, poison, and suffocate any enemies susceptible to their poison and acid attacks.
Nymph keeps away from the front-lines. Due to Glinch's wasteland ruining any vines or plants she summons within seconds, she instead focuses on popping out plants sporadically to yank allies out of the line of attacks, or merely irritating her enemies by momentarily tripping them with vine shackles around their ankles.
Kristoff focuses on dealing damage and draining Glinch's chimeras of their blood. Any injuries he inflicts tend to bleed heavily, especially when he focuses his mind on doing so.
Serena uses her magic to boost dozens of newly ascended low-Emperors to mid and high tier Emperors, making their powers considerably more deadly. She also keeps her eyes out for invisible threats or other troublesome soul fluctuations.
Crow stays on the front-lines. Her incredibly durable body allows her to retain the title of the mightiest melee attacker among all the demons present.
Melody focuses on defense. Instead of trying to kill the chimeras, she leaves that business to the superior damage-dealers and instead uses her shockwaves to fling her enemies around and batter their attacks aside.
Vespera plays a versatile role, sometimes summoning shadowy minions to assist the others, sometimes jumping into battle herself to cut chimeras down, and other times teleporting around through the various shadows to distract the different enemies.
Rhesus becomes far stronger after evolving. Despite being hesitant to bother with the pills, he is no different from the other demons in his desire to mutate to Emperor, and the permanent strength increase he obtains puts him second only to Crow herself. Perhaps given time he will even surpass her as his power approaches the apex of the Emperor level!
And finally, Bael swings his flail with reckless abandon. He batters any enemy that jumps in front of him without any thought to strategy or planning. He ends up attacking with a strength not far behind Yardrat, dealing the killing blow to more than a few of Glinch's monsters.
For hours, the demon elites beat and batter their way past dozens of highly enhanced creatures, becoming more and more cognizant of the fact that if Glinch wanted them dead, he could merely command his chimera to swarm them and they wouldn't stand a chance of survival. It causes the smarter elites to shudder when they realize Glinch possesses military strength greater than the combined might of all Seven Hells, even after their ascension!
However, Bael is not one of those highly intelligent elites. He doesn't give these matters much thought. He merely continues beating the shit out of his enemies, pausing once in a while to rest his weary body and swap out with the other Emperors nearby as they fight with all their might to push toward the center of the Stitched Wasteland.
At some point, while Bael does his thing, a spiritual sense awakens from within the Matriarch's Armor.
Emperor Ose's remnant soul sliver opens her eyes and returns to the physical realm, unaware of what has been going on since she began resting. With what remains of her former self, she isn't able to stay awake for days and weeks like she could when she was still alive. She has to sleep frequently, lest her soul dissipate from straining itself. She awakens to find that Bael is no longer meandering around on Tarus II or hanging out in her secret demonic base. Instead, he's become engaged in some sort of incredible high-stakes battle, along with dozens of other mighty demon elites!
Ose blinks several times. She says nothing to Bael, but uses what's left of her spiritual senses to try and get a sense of the other demons around her.
Hm? So many Emperors... what happened over the last few days? Have I been unconscious for longer than I anticipated?
She gazes at Vespera, Rhesus, and Vepar, her eyes widening as she recognizes the permanent status of their new Emperor rank.
Devils! Has the Wordsmith's Belial Booster become more effective? How in the Seven Hells can there be fifty brand new Emperors out of nowhere?
She identifies the former Dukes with ease, having once been intimately familiar with the elites of the Seven Hells.
This is... the Stitched Wasteland? Why is everyone going against Glinch? No, more importantly, why do his minions appear to be so much more powerful than I remember? I heard they were at the level of Emperors, but now it seems they must be higher than Emperors, but lower than Demon Deities. Perhaps half-step Deities? Or simply Emperor-level souls contained within much stronger bodies?
Ose doesn't immediately decide to question Bael. She doesn't even alert him to the fact she's awakened. He's a moron anyway, so talking to him won't provide her with much more info than if she simply used her judgment to determine what's going on.
This is all so strange. Ose thinks. According to the Matriarch Armor's internal chronometer, I've only been asleep a single week, yet a frightening number of things have changed. Has a demon civil war erupted? Perhaps Glinch has decided to rebel against the Seven Hells, so Auger opted to put him down once and for all?
Her spiritual form shakes its head.
No. That isn't Glinch's style. He doesn't care about amassing power, or wealth, or fame and fortune. He doesn't care who rules the Seven Hells. He can't be bought, or bribed, or intimidated, or cowed into submission. Glinch does whatever Glinch wants to do, and not even the Volgrim can change his ways. Since his ability to manipulate bodies and souls is so formidable, the Volgrim have even lowered their heads to commission him on various top-secret R&D projects...
Ose narrows her eyes. Unlike the overwhelming majority of her kin, she is a demon who specializes in not only subterfuge and infiltration, but also high technology. She has stolen many peeks at the Volgrim's Black Level projects in a manner most discreet. Not even the High Technopaths were able to discover her breaches.
If Glinch isn't rebelling, then... could it be that this fierce battle isn't what it seems on the surface?
She pieces together multiple clues at blinding speeds.
Look at how Glinch's army only moves toward the assault force in groups of two or three. They could easily swarm Yardrat and the others, but they don't. That means Glinch is holding back.
She nods to herself.
Coupled with the fact that so many Emperors have ascended... ahhhh...
Ose forms a hypothesis, mulls it over, and smiles to herself.
So it's like that. Glinch must have been commissioned or requested by Auger to improve the fighting capabilities of the Seven Hells. Perhaps he developed some secret new method to uplift demons to the rank of Emperor at Auger's request, and now he's helping battle-forge these new elites. A sound strategy, considering the Wordsmith's rapid rise to power.
Ose ultimately comes to the wrong conclusion, but based on purely the different observable clues in her field of vision, the guess is quite good. She comes to assume that this is part of a secret training exercise intended to build up Hell's forces and churn out powerful fighters capable of pressing against the Wordsmith's bulwark.
Beelzebub isn't here. Ose thinks. None of the Second Hell's residents either. The Hell of Lust must have become quite intimate with the humans, which makes sense. Unlike the other Hells, they rely on fornication with humans to uplift their bodies and souls. The two make for optimal allies.
She checks out the allied forces again, this time paying attention to the specific demons present.
It seems not a single demon that has shown sympathies toward the Wordsmiths has come along. Melody is here all alone. Her Hell always was at least somewhat aligned with humanity, but Melody herself won't be particularly attached to non-demons. Yama isn't here... he must still be at large, along with Mephisto.
Unaware of the fates which befell Mephisto, Yama, and several other demons over the past week, Ose unfortunately misses a few important clues, but that can hardly be blamed on her.
Kristoff, Vespera, and Rhesus. Is this all that remains of the Hell of Blood? Perhaps they left their remaining Dukes behind as a reserve force, or perhaps those members will be uplifted later. I wonder what Auger is thinking, raising so many Emperors at once. He won't be able to keep news of their ascensions a secret for long. The Wordsmith will find out, and he'll become immediately suspicious provided he has an IQ five points higher than Bael.
As her thoughts drift to Bael, Ose finally decides to open up to him.
[Hey, idiot. I'm awake. What's going on here?]
Bael swings Big Bonk at the head of a fifteen-foot-tall brutish monster not unlike the one he first fought when he entered the Stitched Wasteland, but this one possesses a turtle-like shell on its back, making it specially resistant to heavy attacks.
"Huh?" Bael asks, after retracting his flail. "Oh, Ose! You're awake! Gimme a few minutes, I gotta pound some punks!"
Ose rolls her eyes. [No need for that. Just take a few steps back and talk to me. This training exercise isn't a life and death matter anyway.]
Bael pauses to consider her words. His jaw slackens a little as he tries to catch up with what she said.
"It... it's not?"
Some of the demons nearby Bael notice his attacks slowing. A couple even hear him talking to himself, but unable to hear Ose's voice, they just assume the poor galumpf must be having one of his ditsy moments. They quickly fill the gap lost by Bael's slowed momentum, leaving him to fall back even further.
[Of course not.] Ose says. [Tell me what this exercise is all about. How did Glinch uplift so many demons to the Rank of Emperor?]
Bael's eyes widen. "Wow, Ose! You just woke up and you already know Glinch did this? You're so smart!"
[I don't need your praise.] Ose says, annoyed. [Just tell me how Glinch raised fifty Emperors in only a week.]
"Ohh. Uh, he gave us special pills." Bael says. "Yeah, super strong stuff. Made my titties bigger too."
Ose blinks. [What?]
"My titties. They got real big. Didn't grow my ding-dong back though..."
Bael eyes fill with tears as he remembers the sadness he felt when his pants remained uninflated.
[Moron! I don't care about y-your mammary expansion! What sorts of pills were they? How did Glinch make them?]
Ose's growing frustration, as always, proves impossible to keep out of her voice. Bael doesn't seem to mind.
"Oh I dunno. Kristoff said something about x-beats and blood." Bael explains absentmindedly. "Why? You wanna grow bigger soul-titties too?"
[NO!] Ose roars. [I don't care about my boob size, you nimrod! FOCUS! What 'x-beats' are you talking about? Do you mean EXOBEASTS?]
A light seems to go off in Bael's eyes.
"Ohh, right! Yeah! X-O beasts! Like uh, X-O-X-O. Kissing beasts! I'm so silly. Can't believe I forgot that."
Ose closes her eyes and makes punching motions toward an invisible wall.
I'm gonna kill him. She thinks. I'm going to kill Bael and torture his soul for all eternity if I EVER figure out a way to bring myself back.
She clenches her jaw and opens her eyes.
[Bael. Does the Wordsmith know about Auger's plan yet?]
Bael scrunches up his face.
"Uhhh... Auger's... plan?"
[Yes. His plan to create more Emperors.] Ose clarifies. [He's working with Glinch, yes?]
"He is?!" Bael gasps. "Wow! Auger's so smart. I'd never have thought of that. This sure explains a lot."
Invisible question marks pop up above Ose's head. She squints her eyes as if trying to look inside Bael's head and locate his pebble-sized brain amidst a galaxy-sized void of emptiness.
[So... does... the Wordsmith... know?] Ose asks through gritted teeth.
"Nah. Doubt it." Bael says, waving his hands nonchalantly. "Unless..."
[Unless?] Ose asks.
"Unless it's all part of Auger's brilliant plan." Bael concludes, nodding to himself. "Damn. How is everyone so smart? And I thought we were coming here to kill Mephisto."
Ose's face freezes. A feeling like cracked ice washes across her soul.
[Me...phisto? You're here to kill Mephisto?]
"I dunno." Bael shrugs. "I thought we were coming here to kill him. But this must be part of Auger's plan to trick me and the others so he can make the Hells super strong. I guess all that stuff about Mephisto becoming a Demon Deity didn't mean anything after all. Thanks for helping me understand, Ose! You're the best!"
Bael gives Ose a HUGE mental thumbs up, grinning at her with the same level of stupid happiness he always does.
Ose's soul nearly implodes from the mental gymnastics Bael just unleashed upon her.
[Oh... devils...] Ose weeps. [Why... why couldn't I have been trapped with Auger... or Fenrir... or Gorn... even Serena! Why did I have to end up stuck with demonkind's biggest idiot?]
"It's probably just your bad karma." Bael grunts. "You were such a bad girl, taking all those dirty pics. The Creator had to punish ya."
[WHAT PICS?!] Ose snaps. [Bael, I'm going to turn your pea-brain into MUSH if you keep thinking such VILE thoughts!]
In the middle of Ose's raging, Yardrat fights his way to Bael's side.
"Bael! Is something wrong? Why have you stopped attacking? Are you exhausted?"
Bael blinks. He turns his attention to Yardrat.
"Huh? Nah, nah. Ose woke up, so I'm having a chat with her real quick."
He pauses before adding: "By the way, why didn't ya tell me this was all Auger's brilliant plan? You know I'm good at keeping secrets!"
Yardrat glances at Bael, baffled, while continuing to conjure lines of eviscerating spatial attacks upon the frontline enemies.
"What plan? What are you on about?"
Bael lightly slaps Yardrat's back and chuckles.
"Aw, man. Good one, Yardy-boy! What plan? Hah! You're a real kick in the pants sometimes!"
Yardrat pauses his fighting to stare at Bael for three full seconds in absolute confusion. Then he turns and walks away, muttering something under his breath about that guy being off his rocker ever since he body-swapped.
Bael jumps back into combat, having finally figured out the 'true' reason for coming here. As for Ose, she mentally slumps to the 'floor' of Bael's Mind Realm, drained by the idiocy she's just endured.
But, at least now she better understands the actual situation.
Ose sets aside her anger and rage. She closes her eyes and focuses, thinking about what she's actually learned. Her swift mind allows her to combine the new, albeit potentially unreliable intel she obtained from Bael, with her pre-existing theories.
Mephisto is ascending to Demon Deity. Glinch must be working to train up an army of Emperors... for some reason. Perhaps Mephisto threatens his interests or something. Ugh. If only I could just speak directly to someone not named Bael. If ONLY I had made my soul interface capable of projecting my voice outwards. Stupid, stupid!
Ose begins to feel glum.
She looks up at the sky, her senses able to detect anything around the Matriarch Armor within a 360 degree sphere.
She gazes at the waning sun, the ashen clouds of the Stitched Wasteland only blocking some of her view toward space.
I have to be more proactive. I can't just blame Bael. It's not his fault he was born with the IQ of a dead slug. I mean, it's a LITTLE bit his fault... but he can't really help being unable to retain information for longer than five nanoseconds. If I'd simply planned out my existence post-mortem, I might still manage to retain some influence over the Hells.
Ose becomes momentarily depressed. She begins to wonder if these things even truly matter.
She's dead.
She's unlikely to ever again walk the plane of existence.
She's not powerful anymore. All she has left is a fragment of a soul and her intellect formed during her 100,000+ years of life.
But that depression quickly fades away as she firms her resolve.
Ose is many things. She's easily annoyed by idiocy, temperamental, stuck up, and a bit of a viper, but she isn't mentally weak. Her willpower is formidable, and it was forged by the life she's endured, as well as the actions her adoptive mother took to empower her in her youth.
I don't need a body or magic to remain relevant. Ose thinks. I still have my intellect. Even if I can't taste good food or lounge on a comfortable bed, I still have ambitions. I want to continue expanding my influence.
She rubs her chin and looks thoughtfully at the battle around her.
Bael's an idiot. But he's also easy to manipulate and control. And nobody would ever expect him to accomplish much. That means the humans, the other demons, and especially the Volgrim will underestimate him.
Hmm.
Perhaps I can turn this situation to my advantage.
Her attention pivots to Glinch's laboratory, still more than a hundred miles away.
I wonder if the Stitched Emperor might be able to help my situation, too? It's certainly worth a shot.
So many possibilities...
Ose will never bow to the universe's will, so long as she retains her mental faculties.
She will never surrender.

After every Demon Duke pops one of Glinch's pills, they begin to evolve. The change shocks the Emperors to their cores. Yardrat prepared himself for the inevitability that these incredible pills would do the unthinkable, but seeing it happen in real-time is very different from imagining the concept in his head.
He and the other leaders, movers, and shakers of the Four Hells who came along can only watch numbly as Vespera, Rhesus, Hamir, Vepar, and all the other Dukes explode in strength, smashing through their limiters to ascend to the realm of Demon Emperor.
Their bodies glow with power. They fall to their knees and roar to the heavens, delighted in achieving that which they previously thought was unattainable.
In an instant, the balance of power across every Hell shifts, yet few even know of that which has just transpired, and fewer still take the time to think clearly about what this will surely mean in the coming days, weeks, months, and years.
If they cannot defeat Mephisto, it won't matter if they have six Emperors or six hundred. The power of a Demon Deity will crush them all into dust, with nothing left behind, aside from their dying screams.
As for the fifty newly ascended Emperors, their names and titles are numerous, almost numbing to dwell on. Among them are a smattering of renowned individuals, such as:
Vepar, the Corrosive Emperor.
Vespera, the Emperor of Nebulae.
Rhesus, the Emperor of Ripping.
Hamir, the Emperor of Tempests.
As well as numerous others.
The moment they ascend, their titles become known to all demons who gaze upon them. They need not speak these titles, as if having been named directly by the Creator himself. In the entire history of demonkind, few have managed to shroud their true names, the most notable individual being Gressil, who hid his Emperor-level strength until the time was right for others to know.
But these newly risen Emperors have neither a need nor a desire to hide their powerful new titles. They look at one another and grin evilly, excited to begin wielding their abilities as soon as possible.
After distributing half of the pills, Yardrat finds that he still has more than forty left. He turns to Emperor Melody.
"It wouldn't be appropriate for me to hold onto the rest." He says. "My Hell already has more elites than everyone else. If we make it out of here alive, rebuild the Hell of Isolation with these."
The other Emperors blink in surprise at Yardrat's gesture of goodwill. Some of them feel it's a bit of a waste, but the longest lived Emperors and former Dukes ultimately don't bother to interrupt him.
Bael crosses his arms and nods.
"Good call, Yardy-boy. That's what Shax would want."
"Shax was a fine demon." Yardrat says, as Melody takes the pills from him. "His death has always weighed on my mind. If I can help his Hell with a small gesture like this, then I'll do so without thinking twice."
"Thank you." Melody says quietly, looking at Yardrat with a strange gaze. She pockets the pills and sighs.
Shax wasn't just a cool music-loving dude, but a kind demon who made countless friends. He never attacked or fought anybody undeservedly, and he based his Hell on the principles of friendship and cooperation. Even the demons who might not have gotten along with him still respected him. His death to the humans ruined the morale of many demons at the time.
"Don't thank me until we kill Mephisto and leave here alive." Yardrat says, turning his attention to the distant center of the Stitched wasteland. "Everyone, let's move out. And remember, those pills were not for our benefit. This is where the real fight begins."
The others nod grimly. They begin marching toward Glinch's lair, and as they walk, powerful chimera cross their paths at regular intervals. No longer do only two or three of Glinch's minions appear, but instead five and six at a time, each and every individual far too powerful for mere Emperors to defeat alone. They quickly get the impression Glinch has managed to raise entities capable of challenging 5th and perhaps even 6th-Level Psions.
With nearly sixty Emperors on their side, the swarm of demons begins moving forward with great haste.
Yardrat imbues his body with the power of space. He flickers around to deal massive damage to Glinch's chimera with punches that rip across dimensional spaces.
Fae flies into the air and rains bombs from above. She takes the initiative to attack distant enemies with her strongest bombs, weakening and softening them up for her allies to take on later.
Dagon and Vepar work together. With both of their powers having reached the bottom of the Emperor-level in strength, they melt, corrode, poison, and suffocate any enemies susceptible to their poison and acid attacks.
Nymph keeps away from the front-lines. Due to Glinch's wasteland ruining any vines or plants she summons within seconds, she instead focuses on popping out plants sporadically to yank allies out of the line of attacks, or merely irritating her enemies by momentarily tripping them with vine shackles around their ankles.
Kristoff focuses on dealing damage and draining Glinch's chimeras of their blood. Any injuries he inflicts tend to bleed heavily, especially when he focuses his mind on doing so.
Serena uses her magic to boost dozens of newly ascended low-Emperors to mid and high tier Emperors, making their powers considerably more deadly. She also keeps her eyes out for invisible threats or other troublesome soul fluctuations.
Crow stays on the front-lines. Her incredibly durable body allows her to retain the title of the mightiest melee attacker among all the demons present.
Melody focuses on defense. Instead of trying to kill the chimeras, she leaves that business to the superior damage-dealers and instead uses her shockwaves to fling her enemies around and batter their attacks aside.
Vespera plays a versatile role, sometimes summoning shadowy minions to assist the others, sometimes jumping into battle herself to cut chimeras down, and other times teleporting around through the various shadows to distract the different enemies.
Rhesus becomes far stronger after evolving. Despite being hesitant to bother with the pills, he is no different from the other demons in his desire to mutate to Emperor, and the permanent strength increase he obtains puts him second only to Crow herself. Perhaps given time he will even surpass her as his power approaches the apex of the Emperor level!
And finally, Bael swings his flail with reckless abandon. He batters any enemy that jumps in front of him without any thought to strategy or planning. He ends up attacking with a strength not far behind Yardrat, dealing the killing blow to more than a few of Glinch's monsters.
For hours, the demon elites beat and batter their way past dozens of highly enhanced creatures, becoming more and more cognizant of the fact that if Glinch wanted them dead, he could merely command his chimera to swarm them and they wouldn't stand a chance of survival. It causes the smarter elites to shudder when they realize Glinch possesses military strength greater than the combined might of all Seven Hells, even after their ascension!
However, Bael is not one of those highly intelligent elites. He doesn't give these matters much thought. He merely continues beating the shit out of his enemies, pausing once in a while to rest his weary body and swap out with the other Emperors nearby as they fight with all their might to push toward the center of the Stitched Wasteland.
At some point, while Bael does his thing, a spiritual sense awakens from within the Matriarch's Armor.
Emperor Ose's remnant soul sliver opens her eyes and returns to the physical realm, unaware of what has been going on since she began resting. With what remains of her former self, she isn't able to stay awake for days and weeks like she could when she was still alive. She has to sleep frequently, lest her soul dissipate from straining itself. She awakens to find that Bael is no longer meandering around on Tarus II or hanging out in her secret demonic base. Instead, he's become engaged in some sort of incredible high-stakes battle, along with dozens of other mighty demon elites!
Ose blinks several times. She says nothing to Bael, but uses what's left of her spiritual senses to try and get a sense of the other demons around her.
Hm? So many Emperors... what happened over the last few days? Have I been unconscious for longer than I anticipated?
She gazes at Vespera, Rhesus, and Vepar, her eyes widening as she recognizes the permanent status of their new Emperor rank.
Devils! Has the Wordsmith's Belial Booster become more effective? How in the Seven Hells can there be fifty brand new Emperors out of nowhere?
She identifies the former Dukes with ease, having once been intimately familiar with the elites of the Seven Hells.
This is... the Stitched Wasteland? Why is everyone going against Glinch? No, more importantly, why do his minions appear to be so much more powerful than I remember? I heard they were at the level of Emperors, but now it seems they must be higher than Emperors, but lower than Demon Deities. Perhaps half-step Deities? Or simply Emperor-level souls contained within much stronger bodies?
Ose doesn't immediately decide to question Bael. She doesn't even alert him to the fact she's awakened. He's a moron anyway, so talking to him won't provide her with much more info than if she simply used her judgment to determine what's going on.
This is all so strange. Ose thinks. According to the Matriarch Armor's internal chronometer, I've only been asleep a single week, yet a frightening number of things have changed. Has a demon civil war erupted? Perhaps Glinch has decided to rebel against the Seven Hells, so Auger opted to put him down once and for all?
Her spiritual form shakes its head.
No. That isn't Glinch's style. He doesn't care about amassing power, or wealth, or fame and fortune. He doesn't care who rules the Seven Hells. He can't be bought, or bribed, or intimidated, or cowed into submission. Glinch does whatever Glinch wants to do, and not even the Volgrim can change his ways. Since his ability to manipulate bodies and souls is so formidable, the Volgrim have even lowered their heads to commission him on various top-secret R&D projects...
Ose narrows her eyes. Unlike the overwhelming majority of her kin, she is a demon who specializes in not only subterfuge and infiltration, but also high technology. She has stolen many peeks at the Volgrim's Black Level projects in a manner most discreet. Not even the High Technopaths were able to discover her breaches.
If Glinch isn't rebelling, then... could it be that this fierce battle isn't what it seems on the surface?
She pieces together multiple clues at blinding speeds.
Look at how Glinch's army only moves toward the assault force in groups of two or three. They could easily swarm Yardrat and the others, but they don't. That means Glinch is holding back.
She nods to herself.
Coupled with the fact that so many Emperors have ascended... ahhhh...
Ose forms a hypothesis, mulls it over, and smiles to herself.
So it's like that. Glinch must have been commissioned or requested by Auger to improve the fighting capabilities of the Seven Hells. Perhaps he developed some secret new method to uplift demons to the rank of Emperor at Auger's request, and now he's helping battle-forge these new elites. A sound strategy, considering the Wordsmith's rapid rise to power.
Ose ultimately comes to the wrong conclusion, but based on purely the different observable clues in her field of vision, the guess is quite good. She comes to assume that this is part of a secret training exercise intended to build up Hell's forces and churn out powerful fighters capable of pressing against the Wordsmith's bulwark.
Beelzebub isn't here. Ose thinks. None of the Second Hell's residents either. The Hell of Lust must have become quite intimate with the humans, which makes sense. Unlike the other Hells, they rely on fornication with humans to uplift their bodies and souls. The two make for optimal allies.
She checks out the allied forces again, this time paying attention to the specific demons present.
It seems not a single demon that has shown sympathies toward the Wordsmiths has come along. Melody is here all alone. Her Hell always was at least somewhat aligned with humanity, but Melody herself won't be particularly attached to non-demons. Yama isn't here... he must still be at large, along with Mephisto.
Unaware of the fates which befell Mephisto, Yama, and several other demons over the past week, Ose unfortunately misses a few important clues, but that can hardly be blamed on her.
Kristoff, Vespera, and Rhesus. Is this all that remains of the Hell of Blood? Perhaps they left their remaining Dukes behind as a reserve force, or perhaps those members will be uplifted later. I wonder what Auger is thinking, raising so many Emperors at once. He won't be able to keep news of their ascensions a secret for long. The Wordsmith will find out, and he'll become immediately suspicious provided he has an IQ five points higher than Bael.
As her thoughts drift to Bael, Ose finally decides to open up to him.
[Hey, idiot. I'm awake. What's going on here?]
Bael swings Big Bonk at the head of a fifteen-foot-tall brutish monster not unlike the one he first fought when he entered the Stitched Wasteland, but this one possesses a turtle-like shell on its back, making it specially resistant to heavy attacks.
"Huh?" Bael asks, after retracting his flail. "Oh, Ose! You're awake! Gimme a few minutes, I gotta pound some punks!"
Ose rolls her eyes. [No need for that. Just take a few steps back and talk to me. This training exercise isn't a life and death matter anyway.]
Bael pauses to consider her words. His jaw slackens a little as he tries to catch up with what she said.
"It... it's not?"
Some of the demons nearby Bael notice his attacks slowing. A couple even hear him talking to himself, but unable to hear Ose's voice, they just assume the poor galumpf must be having one of his ditsy moments. They quickly fill the gap lost by Bael's slowed momentum, leaving him to fall back even further.
[Of course not.] Ose says. [Tell me what this exercise is all about. How did Glinch uplift so many demons to the Rank of Emperor?]
Bael's eyes widen. "Wow, Ose! You just woke up and you already know Glinch did this? You're so smart!"
[I don't need your praise.] Ose says, annoyed. [Just tell me how Glinch raised fifty Emperors in only a week.]
"Ohh. Uh, he gave us special pills." Bael says. "Yeah, super strong stuff. Made my titties bigger too."
Ose blinks. [What?]
"My titties. They got real big. Didn't grow my ding-dong back though..."
Bael eyes fill with tears as he remembers the sadness he felt when his pants remained uninflated.
[Moron! I don't care about y-your mammary expansion! What sorts of pills were they? How did Glinch make them?]
Ose's growing frustration, as always, proves impossible to keep out of her voice. Bael doesn't seem to mind.
"Oh I dunno. Kristoff said something about x-beats and blood." Bael explains absentmindedly. "Why? You wanna grow bigger soul-titties too?"
[NO!] Ose roars. [I don't care about my boob size, you nimrod! FOCUS! What 'x-beats' are you talking about? Do you mean EXOBEASTS?]
A light seems to go off in Bael's eyes.
"Ohh, right! Yeah! X-O beasts! Like uh, X-O-X-O. Kissing beasts! I'm so silly. Can't believe I forgot that."
Ose closes her eyes and makes punching motions toward an invisible wall.
I'm gonna kill him. She thinks. I'm going to kill Bael and torture his soul for all eternity if I EVER figure out a way to bring myself back.
She clenches her jaw and opens her eyes.
[Bael. Does the Wordsmith know about Auger's plan yet?]
Bael scrunches up his face.
"Uhhh... Auger's... plan?"
[Yes. His plan to create more Emperors.] Ose clarifies. [He's working with Glinch, yes?]
"He is?!" Bael gasps. "Wow! Auger's so smart. I'd never have thought of that. This sure explains a lot."
Invisible question marks pop up above Ose's head. She squints her eyes as if trying to look inside Bael's head and locate his pebble-sized brain amidst a galaxy-sized void of emptiness.
[So... does... the Wordsmith... know?] Ose asks through gritted teeth.
"Nah. Doubt it." Bael says, waving his hands nonchalantly. "Unless..."
[Unless?] Ose asks.
"Unless it's all part of Auger's brilliant plan." Bael concludes, nodding to himself. "Damn. How is everyone so smart? And I thought we were coming here to kill Mephisto."
Ose's face freezes. A feeling like cracked ice washes across her soul.
[Me...phisto? You're here to kill Mephisto?]
"I dunno." Bael shrugs. "I thought we were coming here to kill him. But this must be part of Auger's plan to trick me and the others so he can make the Hells super strong. I guess all that stuff about Mephisto becoming a Demon Deity didn't mean anything after all. Thanks for helping me understand, Ose! You're the best!"
Bael gives Ose a HUGE mental thumbs up, grinning at her with the same level of stupid happiness he always does.
Ose's soul nearly implodes from the mental gymnastics Bael just unleashed upon her.
[Oh... devils...] Ose weeps. [Why... why couldn't I have been trapped with Auger... or Fenrir... or Gorn... even Serena! Why did I have to end up stuck with demonkind's biggest idiot?]
"It's probably just your bad karma." Bael grunts. "You were such a bad girl, taking all those dirty pics. The Creator had to punish ya."
[WHAT PICS?!] Ose snaps. [Bael, I'm going to turn your pea-brain into MUSH if you keep thinking such VILE thoughts!]
In the middle of Ose's raging, Yardrat fights his way to Bael's side.
"Bael! Is something wrong? Why have you stopped attacking? Are you exhausted?"
Bael blinks. He turns his attention to Yardrat.
"Huh? Nah, nah. Ose woke up, so I'm having a chat with her real quick."
He pauses before adding: "By the way, why didn't ya tell me this was all Auger's brilliant plan? You know I'm good at keeping secrets!"
Yardrat glances at Bael, baffled, while continuing to conjure lines of eviscerating spatial attacks upon the frontline enemies.
"What plan? What are you on about?"
Bael lightly slaps Yardrat's back and chuckles.
"Aw, man. Good one, Yardy-boy! What plan? Hah! You're a real kick in the pants sometimes!"
Yardrat pauses his fighting to stare at Bael for three full seconds in absolute confusion. Then he turns and walks away, muttering something under his breath about that guy being off his rocker ever since he body-swapped.
Bael jumps back into combat, having finally figured out the 'true' reason for coming here. As for Ose, she mentally slumps to the 'floor' of Bael's Mind Realm, drained by the idiocy she's just endured.
But, at least now she better understands the actual situation.
Ose sets aside her anger and rage. She closes her eyes and focuses, thinking about what she's actually learned. Her swift mind allows her to combine the new, albeit potentially unreliable intel she obtained from Bael, with her pre-existing theories.
Mephisto is ascending to Demon Deity. Glinch must be working to train up an army of Emperors... for some reason. Perhaps Mephisto threatens his interests or something. Ugh. If only I could just speak directly to someone not named Bael. If ONLY I had made my soul interface capable of projecting my voice outwards. Stupid, stupid!
Ose begins to feel glum.
She looks up at the sky, her senses able to detect anything around the Matriarch Armor within a 360 degree sphere.
She gazes at the waning sun, the ashen clouds of the Stitched Wasteland only blocking some of her view toward space.
I have to be more proactive. I can't just blame Bael. It's not his fault he was born with the IQ of a dead slug. I mean, it's a LITTLE bit his fault... but he can't really help being unable to retain information for longer than five nanoseconds. If I'd simply planned out my existence post-mortem, I might still manage to retain some influence over the Hells.
Ose becomes momentarily depressed. She begins to wonder if these things even truly matter.
She's dead.
She's unlikely to ever again walk the plane of existence.
She's not powerful anymore. All she has left is a fragment of a soul and her intellect formed during her 100,000+ years of life.
But that depression quickly fades away as she firms her resolve.
Ose is many things. She's easily annoyed by idiocy, temperamental, stuck up, and a bit of a viper, but she isn't mentally weak. Her willpower is formidable, and it was forged by the life she's endured, as well as the actions her adoptive mother took to empower her in her youth.
I don't need a body or magic to remain relevant. Ose thinks. I still have my intellect. Even if I can't taste good food or lounge on a comfortable bed, I still have ambitions. I want to continue expanding my influence.
She rubs her chin and looks thoughtfully at the battle around her.
Bael's an idiot. But he's also easy to manipulate and control. And nobody would ever expect him to accomplish much. That means the humans, the other demons, and especially the Volgrim will underestimate him.
Hmm.
Perhaps I can turn this situation to my advantage.
Her attention pivots to Glinch's laboratory, still more than a hundred miles away.
I wonder if the Stitched Emperor might be able to help my situation, too? It's certainly worth a shot.
So many possibilities...
Ose will never bow to the universe's will, so long as she retains her mental faculties.
She will never surrender.

On the planet teeming with eight billion others, I was just another face in the crowd, navigating the tumultuous corridors of high school, unknowing of how little I actually mattered to the universe. Today, we were ticking off the second to last day of the school year, and we had the liberty of a half day, making lunchtime the closing bell.
At fifteen, I was awkwardly wading through the stormy seas of adolescence, complete with the scourge of hormonal surges and the unfortunate sprinkling of acne dotting my face. My world was wonderfully wrapped up in a corner of our high school cafeteria, a realm presided over by Emila. The dazzling subject of my dreams, she held me under her spell with her enchanting beauty. Her hair, a river of glistening platinum, formed a comforting canopy around me, filling my senses with a tantalizing mix of coconut-scented shampoo and the memorable reminder of our gym sessions.
“Alex, come back to Earth!”
My Emila-infused daydream was interrupted by Elijah, my only friend in a table full of acquaintances.
“Did you see the TikTok I sent?”
He asked, a twinkle of devilish delight dancing in his eyes. I fumbled for my phone, eager for a dose of Elijah’s promised comedy, only to find the video was no longer available with unsurprising speed.
“Man, it was comedy gold! Imagine Thanos, asscheeks and all, telling the most offensive Holocaust joke. Legendary stuff”
Elijah chuckled heartily, his laughter echoing around the room, amplified by his own creative narrative.
“Sure sounds like it”
I muttered, my gaze returning to Emila. Her attention was stolen by my older brother, the infamous Mikey, whose joke had her laughing. Mikey, a final year student with a solid record of academic underachievement and a proclivity for marijuana, was a walking, talking, stoner stereotype. What was unsettling was his inexplicable charm with the wide-eyed freshman girls, a twisted hobby that gave him an unusual sense of satisfaction.
As the bell shrilled, signaling the end of the school day, Mikey abruptly stood up, the metal chair beneath him screeching. His next words, a slurred mix of slangs and contemporary cuss words, were aimed at summoning his freshman fan club. At the same time, he bumbled out a half-hearted invitation for Emila to join their quest for illicit pleasures. Emila's reaction was a fusion of disgust and amusement, an expression I decided to commit to memory for my poetry. She gracefully declined his offer with a well-rehearsed flip of her hair and a disdainful wave of her hand, then she returned to her conversation, laughter pealing from her like sweet music, completely oblivious to my heart hammering in my chest.
Around me, chaos broke loose as the cafeteria, now released from the clutches of academic torture, transitioned into a war zone of wild whoops, boisterous laughter. The last sight that graced my eyes as I exited the cafeteria was the bewildered expression on the face of our school janitor, as he stood paralyzed amidst the storm, mop in hand It was a fittingly ludicrous end to another thrillingly mundane school day. With that, I picked up my bag, donned my headphones, and began my solitary trek home.
The burden of unrequited love weighed heavily upon my weary shoulders as I trudged homeward. In dire need of a hit, I fumbled for my go-to vape, only to be met with the light show of a dead battery. As I hit the 7-Eleven on my route, I was looking forward to seeing Antonio, this dude who seemed more interested in cracking jokes than caring about checking IDs. But instead of Antonio's playful smirk, I came face-to-face with a new character, with wrinkles that told stories of time gone by. A wave of disappointment washed over me as I nabbed a bottle of Dr. Pepper and headed for the cash register.
"What happened to Antonio?"
I asked, putting my drink on the counter for the mystery guy.
"Who?"
He muttered, his focus on the soda can he was sliding under the scanner.
"Antonio, the guy who's usually here in the evenings"
I explained, a hint of irritation in my voice.
"Dunno. I only started here last week. I just know the young girl who takes over when my shift ends"
He responded, his words leaving a gap in my world, like a punch in the gut of my usual routine.
Taking a bubbly swig of my Dr. Pepper, I tried to swallow the truth of teenage life. It was like walking into my favorite cozy room, only to find the furniture rearranged haphazardly. The change was unexpected, and unwelcome.
Finally trekking my way home after sitting on a bench listening to music for what Must've been hours. I walked under a sky that seemed to be experimenting with shades of orange and purple, I felt a strange kind of solitude sneaking in. My thoughts kept playing a merry-go-round with Mikey, Emila, and now absent Antonio - the trio that had become the stars of my high school drama.
My front door protested loudly under my foot's frustrated kick, and a slurred
"WHAT THE FUCK!"
Bellowed from the living room. My mother, ensnared in an alcoholic haze, lounged over the couch, her shaking finger accusingly pointed in my direction.
"Did you forget that I get migraines?"
The smell of tequila permeated the air, filling my nostrils as soon as I crossed the threshold. I sighed, hoping for a lifeline.
"Is dad home?"
My mother sank back onto the couch, her voice a whisper
"No."
My father, the only one who occasionally lent an ear when I complained about Mikey, was perpetually chained to his cubicle, another cog in the corporate machine.
I ascended the stairs, each creaking step a harmony to the melancholic rhythm of the dark. The silent house held the weight of my unease, my chest tightening with an indescribable yearning. Tucked away in the solitude of my room, I pulled out my phone, the screen's glow illuminating my apprehensive features. I typed out a tentative message to Emilia, a small confession of the feelings that had long been gnawing at my insides.
"Hey, Emilia, I..."
First message sent. But before I could finish my second text, the dreaded words - 'Message Failed to Send' stared back at me. My heart sank. Was it a sign? Maybe the universe was intervening, telling me it wasn't the right time, or perhaps, it never would be. Disheartened, I slung my phone aside, letting the unsent feelings hover in the digital void. Slipping under the comforting shroud of my blanket, I drifted off into a sleep, with dreams tinted in hues of Emilia and unspoken words.
The next morning started out ordinary until it was splattered with the color of angst when I pleaded with Mikey that morning to stay away from Emila. His response?
"Amelia, the freshman? Didn't know you had a thing for her."
His nonchalance was maddening.
"Emila. As your brother, I'm asking you to back off"
I clarified, hoping it would penetrate his stubborn exterior.
His perplexed expression turned into a nonchalant shrug.
"Damn, been saying her name wrong the few times we spoke, and she never bothered to correct me."
Mikey shrugged and walked away, leaving me feeling dismissed and unheard.
Feeling a mix of frustration and confusion, I left for school and shook off the encounter with my brother and headed to my first-period class. As I stepped into the room, I expected to see my usual teacher, Ms. Thompson, waiting at her desk. However, to my surprise, it was someone else entirely—a teacher I had never seen before. I had really liked Ms. Thompson too so to see she got a substitute on the last day was dissapointing. Yet his resemblance to Ms. Thompson was uncanny, from the way he held himself to the tone of his voice. I knew something was off.
I glanced around the classroom, taking in the unfamiliar arrangement of notes and papers hanging on the walls. The subjects and diagrams were foreign to me, not matching the usual decor that adorned this space. It was as if I had entered an alternate dimension, where everything seemed the same yet completely different.
As the class went on, the new teacher droned on with the same monotony I had grown accustomed to, but it felt hollow, lacking the genuine concern and passion that Ms. Thompson always displayed. The other students seemed oblivious to the change, talking and cutting up as if nothing was amiss. But I couldn't shake the feeling that something wasn't right.
Throughout the rest of class, my mind wandered, retracing the events of the past few days. Antonios unexpected absence, the failed text to Emila, Mikey's nonchalant reaction to my warning about Emila, the strange teacher in place of Ms. Thompson—it all felt like pieces of a puzzle that didn't quite fit together. For the first time, I realized how little attention I had paid to the details of my daily routine. But now, with this subtle shift in my surroundings, I couldn't help but question everything.
As the class finally came to an end, I gathered my things and made my way out.
The unfolding of the remaining classes before lunch did nothing to alleviate the paranoia that was steadily creeping over me. In my second-period class, usually dedicated to cleaning out the science lab, I noticed a set of instruments that we'd never used before. My peers didn't bat an eyelid, but to me, the incongruity was unsettling. Then in English, our final class reading didn't correspond to the assigned book. The text seemed different, as though it had been subtly altered.
Physical education, typically a free play session on the last day, was different too. Coach Peters was blowing a whistle I'd never seen before, its pitch more grating than the usual. And just before lunch, during the end-of-year assembly, the principal's speech, usually so predictable, seemed off. It contained references to events and achievements that didn't match my memories.
As lunchtime arrived, a mix of anticipation and anxiety filled the air. Even with my world falling apart I found time to worry about Mikey's presence around Emila. However, Emila was nowhere to be found. When I mentioned this to the group as I took my seat, my words were met with silence, as if I had become invisible.
Sitting alone at the edge of the table, I sought solace in our group pictures, hoping to catch a glimpse of Emila. I opened Snapchat and scrolled through my camera roll until I found my favorite picture of her. But to my surprise, Emila was inexplicably absent from the image. I blinked in disbelief, rubbed my eyes, and questioned my own perception. How could she have vanished? In the photo, my arm had once embraced her, but now it hung empty at my side.
"Guys, where's Emila?"
I asked, passing my phone to Elijah. He stared at the screen for a long moment, as if emerging from a trance.
"Who?"
He finally responded absentmindedly, his attention quickly diverted by a video shared by another friend.
Taking back my phone, I desperately searched for more pictures, only to find that they had vanished—her Instagram, Snapchat, even her parents' Facebook profiles. Panic gripped me, and I screamed
"WHERE IS EMILA!?"
My voice resonating through the cafeteria, reverberating off the walls. The entire room fell into an eerie silence, and all eyes turned to me, their gazes fixed with a mix of curiosity and concern.
"Her social media is gone. I feel like I'm going insane, and none of you even acknowledge me!"
My voice cracked with desperation as I pleaded for answers.
Mikey and Elijah rose from their seats, their expressions filled with compassion, ready to console me. But I couldn't bear their pity, their feeble attempts to calm my tormented mind. Their words would be meaningless. With a surge of frantic energy, I pushed my chair back and fled the suffocating atmosphere of the cafeteria.
As I stumbled out of the school, my surroundings blurred in a whirlwind of confusion and distress. The world itself seemed to warp and twist, mocking my feeble attempts to comprehend the inexplicable. Thoughts tumbled through my mind, colliding and fragmenting like shattered glass. Where had Emila gone? How could she vanish so completely, leaving no trace behind? Was I losing my grip on reality?
A light drizzle began peppering the surroundings, setting a somber atmosphere. Hours slipped away as I aimlessly wandered, searching for answers. Maybe someone had slipped me acid-laced food, or perhaps I was crazy like my mother. The thought of my brother's affinity for drugs crossed my mind, but I had never dabbled. Nevertheless, I felt compelled to find a sense of respite in my vape once again.
Entering the 7-Eleven, a chilling sensation overcame me as I discovered the same elderly man behind the counter. Without uttering a word, I hopped over the counter, desperate to find any clue.
"Kid, you can't be back there!"
The man exclaimed, attempting to restrain me. Swiftly, I pushed him away, unearthing the work schedule from the wall.
"Where's Antonio?" I stammered.
The old man, seemed to recognize me.
"I asked about that. Antonio doesn't work here"
He said, struggling to regain his footing. Overwhelmed with a sense of paranoia, I bolted out of the gas station, gasping for breath only when I reached the safety of my home.
In the dim light of the early evening, I found myself sprawled on the unkempt grass of the front yard. The recent rain had left the ground sodden, but I barely noticed the wetness seeping into my clothes. As the rain mingled with my silent tears, I heard the familiar rumble of my older brother Mikey's truck pulling into the driveway.
"Hey pussy"
He exclaimed, pushing his rain-soaked hair back from his forehead. His voice carried a light-hearted jest that felt foreign amidst the somber atmosphere. He was always like this, quick to crack a joke even in the gloomiest of moments. It was his way of diffusing tension, I suppose. He reached out, pulling me up and leading me towards the house. Once inside and in his room, an aroma filled my nose – a peculiar mix of stale pizza and mildewy old books – that somehow comforted me in a strange, indescribable way. It was an olfactory reminder of a time before things got so complicated.
Catching my eye, Mikey reached into his drawer and withdrew an intricately designed glass bong. I had seen it before, on one of those rare occasions when Mikey would let me into his private world. Now, he was extending the invitation again. He passed me the bong, a knowing smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.
I hesitated for a moment, my mind flashing back to times when mom would sit us down in front of the TV after school, her kind and comforting presence a strong reassurance of love and security. That was before the alcohol took over, before the comforting light in her eyes had been replaced by a glassy, distant look. The thought of her brought an odd sense of calmness, as if her spirit was there with me, in Mikey, guiding me through this haze.
Taking the bong from Mikey, I let out a nervous chuckle, matching his playful demeanor. As I took a hit, we fell into a comfortable laughter, punctuated only by the deafening theme song of Family Guy playing on the large TV in the corner of his room. The memory of our shared laughter resonated deeply within me, a balm to the churning unrest I had been feeling.
"It seems today that all you see is violence in movies and -"
Suddenly, the television vanished, replaced by a weathered dresser that had been stored in the attic.
Mikey's phone suddenly blared a familiar jingle.
"Ah, man. One sec, bro,"
"-sex on TV." My brother's phone blared at maximum volume.
"Sorry, bro, my friend texted me"
He explained, placing the phone between us.
"Where's the TV?"
I muttered, the words hardly audible. As the high intensified, the room started to spin, the comfort of Mickey's presence fading away. I reached out in a futile attempt to steady myself but fell onto the cold, hardwood floor. The room seemed to swirl around me, familiar objects distorting into unrecognizable shapes and colors.
Pulling myself up, I lurched out of the room, navigating the labyrinthine house as fragments of memories flooded my mind. It felt like I was walking through a dream – a vivid, disorienting journey through time and space. Stepping outside, I saw the lawn had morphed into a neatly trimmed landscape, A new 'For Sale' sign swaying gently in the evening breeze, dissolved away as quickly as I noticed it.
The sounds of laughter drew my attention to the house. The windows were aglow with warm, inviting light, revealing an unfamiliar family engrossed in their game night. Their joy was a stark contrast to my growing desolation.
As days rolled on, my world reshaped, transforming from the familiar to an enigmatic panorama. Faces blurred, places mutated, my identity itself seemed to wane, fading into oblivion.
Caught in this mutating reality, I felt a quiet observer, my existence phasing out into the ether. Friends, family, Emila - all were doomed to be memories of a boy who will soon be gone.
Then, amidst the dissolving haze, clarity dawned, presenting a profound revelation. Our Earth was yearning for equilibrium, burdened with the weight of 8 billion souls, a possibly infinite and cruel humanity, now quickly seeking balance before it was too late.
We had pushed our home to her brink. Now, a beautiful transformation is underway. Smiling strangers began to color my world, their joy reflecting the Earth's newfound harmony. Merchandise, once an extravagant luxury, now seemed accessible to all. The battlefield in Ukraine had given way to peace, a testament to the world healing its wounds.
As I type this out in a clean and rather nicely lit alleyway. I find myself blending into the cosmic expanse, my hands and arms fading away before returning as if the universe wants me to finish. As I turn from a solid entity into an echo of existence. The world moves on, its stride unperturbed by my fading presence. Yet, in my diminishing, I realize my contribution to Earth's balance.
Earth is in the midst of achieving perfection. Many of you won't make it and will be gutted like myself, some of you will stay. The rest of you, I catch glimpses of as I fade, timeliness unaffected and left to die without God.
My final thoughts are not of sorrow, but of serene acceptance and profound understanding. As I phase into the ether, I became a cosmic whisper, a gentle reminder of the necessity for balance and respect for our fragile planet.

Deuteronomy 28:15-68

But if you will not obey the voice of the Lord your God or be careful to do all his commandments and his statutes that I command you today, then all these curses shall come upon you and overtake you. Cursed shall you be in the city, and cursed shall you be in the field. Cursed shall be your basket and your kneading bowl. Cursed shall be the fruit of your womb and the fruit of your ground, the increase of your herds and the young of your flock. Cursed shall you be when you come in, and cursed shall you be when you go out.
"The Lord will send on you curses, confusion, and frustration in all that you undertake to do, until you are destroyed and perish quickly on account of the evil of your deeds, because you have forsaken me. The Lord will make the pestilence stick to you until he has consumed you off the land that you are entering to take possession of it. The Lord will strike you with wasting disease and with fever, inflammation and fiery heat, and with drought and with blight and with mildew. They shall pursue you until you perish. And the heavens over your head shall be bronze, and the earth under you shall be iron. The Lord will make the rain of your land powder. From heaven dust shall come down on you until you are destroyed.
“The Lord will cause you to be defeated before your enemies. You shall go out one way against them and flee seven ways before them. And you shall be a horror to all the kingdoms of the earth. And your dead body shall be food for all birds of the air and for the beasts of the earth, and there shall be no one to frighten them away. The Lord will strike you with the boils of Egypt, and with tumours and scabs and itch, of which you cannot be healed. The Lord will strike you with madness and blindness and confusion of mind, and you shall grope at noonday, as the blind grope in darkness, and you shall not prosper in your ways. And you shall be only oppressed and robbed continually, and there shall be no one to help you. You shall betroth a wife, but another man shall ravish her. You shall build a house, but you shall not dwell in it. You shall plant a vineyard, but you shall not enjoy its fruit. Your ox shall be slaughtered before your eyes, but you shall not eat any of it. Your donkey shall be seized before your face, but shall not be restored to you. Your sheep shall be given to your enemies, but there shall be no one to help you. Your sons and your daughters shall be given to another people, while your eyes look on and fail with longing for them all day long, but you shall be helpless. A nation that you have not known shall eat up the fruit of your ground and of all your labours, and you shall be only oppressed and crushed continually, so that you are driven mad by the sights that your eyes see. The Lord will strike you on the knees and on the legs with grievous boils of which you cannot be healed, from the sole of your foot to the crown of your head.
“The Lord will bring you and your king whom you set over you to a nation that neither you nor your fathers have known. And there you shall serve other gods of wood and stone. And you shall become a horror, a proverb, and a byword among all the peoples where the Lord will lead you away. You shall carry much seed into the field and shall gather in little, for the locust shall consume it. You shall plant vineyards and dress them, but you shall neither drink of the wine nor gather the grapes, for the worm shall eat them. You shall have olive trees throughout all your territory, but you shall not anoint yourself with the oil, for your olives shall drop off. You shall father sons and daughters, but they shall not be yours, for they shall go into captivity. The cricket shall possess all your trees and the fruit of your ground. The sojourner who is among you shall rise higher and higher above you, and you shall come down lower and lower. He shall lend to you, and you shall not lend to him. He shall be the head, and you shall be the tail.
“All these curses shall come upon you and pursue you and overtake you till you are destroyed, because you did not obey the voice of the Lord your God, to keep his commandments and his statutes that he commanded you. They shall be a sign and a wonder against you and your offspring forever. Because you did not serve the Lord your God with joyfulness and gladness of heart, because of the abundance of all things, therefore you shall serve your enemies whom the Lord will send against you, in hunger and thirst, in nakedness, and lacking everything. And he will put a yoke of iron on your neck until he has destroyed you. The Lord will bring a nation against you from far away, from the end of the earth, swooping down like the eagle, a nation whose language you do not understand, a hard-faced nation who shall not respect the old or show mercy to the young. It shall eat the offspring of your cattle and the fruit of your ground, until you are destroyed; it also shall not leave you grain, wine, or oil, the increase of your herds or the young of your flock, until they have caused you to perish.
“They shall besiege you in all your towns, until your high and fortified walls, in which you trusted, come down throughout all your land. And they shall besiege you in all your towns throughout all your land, which the Lord your God has given you. And you shall eat the fruit of your womb, the flesh of your sons and daughters, whom the Lord your God has given you, in the siege and in the distress with which your enemies shall distress you. The man who is the most tender and refined among you will begrudge food to his brother, to the wife he embraces, and to the last of the children whom he has left, so that he will not give to any of them any of the flesh of his children whom he is eating, because he has nothing else left, in the siege and in the distress with which your enemy shall distress you in all your towns. The most tender and refined woman among you, who would not venture to set the sole of her foot on the ground because she is so delicate and tender, will begrudge to the husband she embraces, to her son and to her daughter, her afterbirth that comes out from between her feet and her children whom she bears, because lacking everything she will eat them secretly, in the siege and in the distress with which your enemy shall distress you in your towns.
“If you are not careful to do all the words of this law that are written in this book, that you may fear this glorious and awesome name, the Lord your God, then the Lord will bring on you and your offspring extraordinary afflictions, afflictions severe and lasting, and sicknesses grievous and lasting. And he will bring upon you again all the diseases of Egypt, of which you were afraid, and they shall cling to you. Every sickness also and every affliction that is not recorded in the book of this law, the Lord will bring upon you, until you are destroyed. Whereas you were as numerous as the stars of heaven, you shall be left few in number, because you did not obey the voice of the Lord your God. And as the Lord took delight in doing you good and multiplying you, so the Lord will take delight in bringing ruin upon you and destroying you. And you shall be plucked off the land that you are entering to take possession of it.
“And the Lord will scatter you among all peoples, from one end of the earth to the other, and there you shall serve other gods of wood and stone, which neither you nor your fathers have known. And among these nations you shall find no respite, and there shall be no resting place for the sole of your foot, but the Lord will give you there a trembling heart and failing eyes and a languishing soul. Your life shall hang in doubt before you. Night and day you shall be in dread and have no assurance of your life. In the morning you shall say, ‘If only it were evening!’ and at evening you shall say, ‘If only it were morning!’ because of the dread that your heart shall feel, and the sights that your eyes shall see. And the Lord will bring you back in ships to Egypt, a journey that I promised that you should never make again; and there you shall offer yourselves for sale to your enemies as male and female slaves, but there will be no buyer.”

There is nothing. No sound, no smells, no darkness. All that exists is a vast openness of white, a blinding, expansive non-existence, where all that remains is pure, unfiltered light. There is no corner of the vast openness where the light is absent, no room for darkness to hide, to escape the seemingly hungry emptiness.
Suddenly, the world glitches slightly. It is for less than a second, but a hint of gray slices through the sky, warping the world around it with the sound of static. But like everything else, the gray is devoured, blinking out of existence as white becomes the only color again.
The small glitch in the world, the spark of gray in blankness left something behind. Something reformed, floating there, alone in the emptiness. It was motionless, asleep, as still as the world around it. Then it awoke.
Memories instantly began to flood back, memories of fighting crime, of loving, of feeling loved. The figure remembered it all, including its name, Haxxalon the Star Archer.
Haxxalon opened his eyes, or at least he thinks he did, the whiteness so bright that darkness didn’t even take him while asleep. His first thought was that he must have been captured by a villain of some sort, a villain that destroyed earth, maybe destroyed the entire universe.The villain could possibly be searching for the star bow, a weapon powerful enough to fire stars into space. It wouldn’t be the first time a villain attacked him for it. Haxxalon would just need to figure out how the villain attacked earth and reverse it.
Haxxalon brought his arms up, trying to regain his sense of sight by focusing on something not white. The problem is, there is nothing. Haxxalon can feel his arms move, but he doesn’t see anything. Haxxalon screams, or at least the sound of screams comes out, as Haxxalon doesn’t feel his mouth move. A sudden feeling shivers down Haxxalon’s spine and he touches his face.
Nothing.
Haxxalon’s face is mere skin, there are no grooves, no holes: it’s all simply soft skin. Haxxalon feels his heart start to beat in his chest, the constant beat fighting against the oppressive silence of the world.
Then… something strange happens. For a split second, Haxxalon swears he sees a drop of blue for a second. A second later, he sees it again. Small sparks of blue electricity fly around and off of a circular object, an object that Haxxalon is sure is his arm. He doesn’t have electricity powers, and yet, that is certainly blue lightning.
Haxxalon barely has time to process that as between the beats of his heart, he hears something. It’s faint, and non-aggressive, conversational in tone. He can’t make out what the figures are saying, but he’s sure there is more than one. The noise is getting closer.
Haxxalon shifts his body, turning around slowly, ready to encounter whatever captured him.

Doom Patrol Presents:

Can’t Escape the Flows of Time

Created by: u/DarkLordJurasus
Produced by: u/brooky12 and u/predaplant
Ambush Bug paces back and forth across the dry grass, his strides large and fast. It has been ten minutes since the Doom Patrol passed out, and Irwin is still as unsure of what to do as he was when the team originally went unconscious.
On his pacing path, Irwin crosses over to Larry, and slightly pushes at him with his foot. Larry begins to tilt, the brown and green backside of his bandages, stained from the grass and dirt, begin to show themselves, as Irwin removes his foot. Larry’s body shifts back to his laying flat on his back.
Irwin sighs in defeat. That was his fourth time trying that, and the third person he tried it on. He’s not going to try it on Robotman, so it looks like he is out of luck.
Ambush Bug looks out at the horizon, the light blue sky, the large, everpresent sun. Retconn hasn’t arrived yet, and Irwin can’t quite tell if that is a good or bad thing. Maybe the six of them lost Retconn, or maybe the company is biding their time for a larger assault on the team.
Behind him, Irwin hears a groan. It’s deep, and yet, sounds like a voice that was autocorrected one too many times. Irwin turns around as other groans join the first, the team has woken up.
Being the first to awake, Cliff Steele, Robotman, is the first to rise from his position on the ground. Looking around, he asks, “What the everloving fuck just happened?”
Niles Caulder replies, “That’s an interesting question Cliff. To answer that though, we must make sure that we all had a similar experience.”
Rita, Elasti-Woman, responds, “I, I remembered everything. It was like a flood of memories unlocked. I still remember what was implanted, what Retconn wanted me to think my past was, but they seem more distant, but…”
Steven Dayton, Mento, continues, “It feels different, like a movie I saw just yesterday. Still burned into my mind with clarity, but not me.”
Rita nods and looks at Steven. For a moment their gazes lock, their hands slightly touching. Rita is the first to cut their gaze, and jerks her hand back. A sadness enters Steven’s eyes as he nods and looks forward.
Niles nods, “I had quite a similar experience.” Niles stills for a moment, his fingers gently stimming on the arm rests of the wheelchair. “It’s possible,” Niles slowly continues, his mind still working as the words exit his mouth, “It is possible that when our specific atoms reintegrated themself into their reality or origin, we essentially experienced a system wide reset, our minds regaining the memories that were originally wiped.”
“Uhm,” Irwin pipes up, “I’m not a scientist or anything, but from the little I understand about multiverse travel, that doesn’t make much sense.”
Niles sighs and stares down in thought. Picking his head back up, he says, “Until today, I thought of the multiverse as a purely theoretical concept, a mere thought experiment. In truth, there can be hundreds of different reasons for our memory recovery, and each one would be just as plausible as the last.”
The whole team is silent again, their thoughts on the insanity of what is happening. Between all of them is an air of uncertainty, and for some, an air of mourning, their memories telling a story that ended without them even being aware.
Larry, looking down, bitterly asks, “Where’s Arturo or Mallory when you need them.”
Silence once again overcomes the group, but only for a moment. Eyes widening, Larry doubletakes, “Did I just make a reference to Sliders? How the hell do I know what Sliders is, that wasn’t a show before Retconn appeared.”
Larry turns to look at Niles who guesses, “Maybe reality is trying to reconnect us to it through inserting popular culture and current events into our brain?”
Seeing unconvinced faces, Niles sighs, “I don’t know. Let’s just go with multiverse magic for now. That makes as much sense as anything else I’ve seen or learned in the past few days.”
For the first time since waking up, Cliff begins to speak, “Yea, real nice conversation, and maybe a different day I’d give two shits about it, but right now we are standing in the middle of nowhere, and I for one would like to get out of here.”
Upon hearing that, Niles smiles, “Now, that is one problem I do have an answer to.”
Looking out to the open expanse, Niles calls out, “Danny, old friend. This is Niles Caulder. I am in need of sanctuary.”
For a moment, nothing happens. The grassy land remains the same. Irwin and Cliff both look ready to make a comment, but stop due to Niles holding up a single finger.
Then, two large Public Access Speakers grow out of the ground, towering over the assembled team in size. From them, the song “Sweet Caroline” by Neil Diamond is playing.
Buildings begin to rise from the dirt in front of the Doom Patrol, both small and large, these buildings grew out of nothing, seemingly not affecting the ground beneath it. At first, all are monochromatic white, but as the taller buildings begin to rise, color blossoms throughout the seemingly growing civilization.
The buildings are each unique and different, some looking more typical in design, others covered in expertly made graffiti, and some even looking like random buckets of paint were thrown haphazardly onto the walls.
Billboards are plentiful, advertising everything from makeup, to planned get togethers. One of the largest advertises a bar having a Drag event for later that week. Strangest of all was the empty billboards that seemed as plentiful, if not more so than the ones that had advertisements on them.
As the final buildings settle, people begin to rise from the ground, most of them mid-movement of conversation. It does not seem they even realize that they moved, and that is because they don’t; the action so invisible to them, that they don’t even acknowledge it.
Everyone seems happy and aware of their surroundings, although there is the occasional incident of knocking over each other due to conversation or looking at the phone. The reason for the air of happiness may be due to their clothing though. Reds and pinks make up the majority of the clothing, and even for those without, navy blue is more common than pure black, although the streets are not without darker colors entirely. A few people in the crowd look as if they shop exclusively at Hot Topic, and despite their clothing choices not meshing, many are conversing happily with someone else in brighter colors.
The last thing to appear is a sign right outside of the new residential area saying, “Welcome! You Are Accepted Here.”
Quietly, but not as quietly as he wanted, Cliff says, “What the fuck?”
Hearing Cliff, Larry quietly agrees with Cliff’s verbal thought.
Continuing to smile, Niles rolls over to the sign and says, “Danny, I must say thank you for coming in such a timely fashion. It is great seeing you again, have you expanded since the last time we met?”
The sign welcoming the team changes, the words, “Hello Niles. Where have you been? It’s been a long time.” appearing.
Niles nods, his smile becoming slightly strained, “Yes, it has been around 60 years, hasn’t it? The story is long and quite strange, but I promise I will tell it to you in its entirety. First, do you think you can get us a place to regroup?”
The words on the sign quickly change again to say, “Your house is still vacant, Niles. After all you did for me, keeping a place empty for you in case you ever returned was the least I could do.”
Niles nods. “Thank you,” he says, before gesturing for the rest of the team to follow.
The team walks through the street, no one around them giving them a second look of shock or fear. To the other people there, the Doom Patrol does not look an ounce out of place. If that’s assuring or worrying, well, Larry is not quite sure.
Finally breaking the silence of the group, Steven gasps, “A talking street is…” Steven stops himself, not wanting to call the new seemingly-sentient street he is on an it, but not knowing what else to call Danny.
Seemingly knowing why Steven stopped, Danny responds on one of the empty billboards, “You can use they/them when referring to me. I don’t necessarily mind being called other pronouns, but I’m not an it, or a thing, and I don’t feel any more masculine or feminine than I would imagine other cities or towns would feel if they were alive.”
Steven nods, but decides to address Danny directly, “You are obviously fully sentient, but does that mean you have a brain? What about other organs? How do you see?”
It takes a second longer than the last response did, Danny replies, “I am not quite sure. I see, but at the same time, I don’t see like how people have described seeing to me; it is more an echolocation than sight. I have energy impulses going throughout me at any moment, but if that is a brain, or if that is just the energy keeping me alive, I can not say. If I do have organs, they are so well hidden, that I do not even recognize them as such.”
Steven nods at the information as both Larry and Irwin open their mouths to ask a question. Cliff beats both of them to it though as he asks, “Do you have a bar?”
A white arrow appears on multiple billboards, pointing Cliff to a place called Danny’s Bar. Cliff gives a stiff, curt nod and walks away from the group towards it.
Larry is quick to follow, but Niles grabs his arm, whispering to him, “Cliff needs some time alone before he will appreciate your presence.”
Larry nods and continues to walk with the group.
—-----------
Hours later, Larry walks into the bar, a fresh, clean, set of radiation-proof bandages on Larry’s body. The bar is huge, with a lot of people doing a myriad of things. Some are playing pool and billiards, others are singing karaoke, some are hanging out with friends, while others are trying to find someone to spend the night with. It didn’t take long for Larry to find Cliff though. Even in the dimmer light, Larry is able to see Cliff, the golden bronze contrasting with the rest of the bar.
Cliff is sitting at the bar, his metal face staring down at the dark wood. There is a beer in both of his hands, and a good dozen or so empty bottles scattered around him. He is silent, taking a large gulp from the beer in his right hand every ten seconds or so.
Larry walks over and gently places a hand on Cliff, unsure if Cliff will even feel the action. “It’s time to go.” Larry says.
Cliff shakes his head, “You can go, I’m staying here.”
Larry tries again, “The team needs you. We need to figure out how to- -”
Cliff slams his drinks against the table and looks up, his robotic eyes still not facing Larry, “What team? There is no fucking team. We had our lives stolen from us by a fucking TV network.”
Larry responds, “That’s why we need to stick together, we need to ensure Retconn can’t take us again.”
Taking a swig of the right beer, Cliff asks, “What if I want Retconn to capture me again?”
Larry is silent, unsure of how to respond. Cliff lets out a roboticized noise that sounds like a sigh. “I had a daughter.”
Cliff stops for a second, recollecting his thoughts. “I had a god damn daughter,” Cliff continues, “When she was born, when I saw her bright smile and innocent eyes, I swore to be a better dad than my own father. I would be in her life, make sure she knew she was loved. Then I left her.”
Larry softly tells Cliff, “It wasn’t your fault.”
Cliff lets out a roboticized laugh. “But it was. I got in a crash drinking while driving, and I woke up in the show with a robot body. Sure, Retconn kidnapped me, but if it wasn’t for Retconn, I’d be dead, I still would have left her.”
Larry says, “I’m sorry.”
Cliff shakes his head, so lost in thought that he doesn’t hear Larry, “It was almost better with Retconn. Sure, I wasn’t human, but I was a hero, I was Robotman, not the deadbeat dad Cliff Steele. I failed Clara, I failed the only thing that mattered to me.”
Cliff’s left metal fist grips the bottle so hard that it smashes in his hand. “The worst part is, for the hours I’ve been in here, I don’t feel any more tipsy than when I came in. I’m still sober, my mind is still functioning, I’m still remembering. This body can’t get fucking drunk, and I hate it.”
Cliff places down his right beer, and lets out a robotic, metallic sigh. “I’m tired,” Cliff finally relents, “Maybe I can get buzzed with enough persistence, but it isn’t happening tonight. I’ll meet you back at Niles’ house, Larry.”
Cliff walks out of the bar, his stride slow and methodical. Larry sits there for a moment stunned. Larry debates buying a drink, but remembers the bandages wrapped around his skin make doing so impossible. Instead he just sits there for a moment. Larry begins to watch, the four women singing off key in the corner, the guy trying to do a cool darts trick to impress his girlfriend, two guys kissing.
Larry’s skin begins to curl as he watches the sight, his head pounding. He needs to get out of there now. It’s clumsy at best, but Larry begins making his way to the door, struggling to not focus on the memories attempting to resurface. He ends up knocking into a chair, and not even seeing who is there, mumbles out a “Sorry” as he continues to move. He needs fresh air, he craves it. Finally the doors to the bar close behind him, and Larry collapses on the front steps, memories forcing their way to the front of Larry’s mind.
—--------------------------------------
Larry stood in front of the door to his house, his body frozen solid. For a moment, he thought he couldn’t do it, he thought about running away, running away from the screaming, the crying, the cursing, and the occasional slapping. He’s endured it for over a month now, and it hasn’t lessened, he isn’t sure how much more he can endure.
He wanted to scream that it isn’t his fault, that’s it’s not his fault God made him wrong, broken. He doesn’t though. He only ever said something like that once and it led to his father punching him, not slapping him or spanking him, but straight up punching him. Since then, Larry had made sure to repeat what his parents told him. It wasn’t God that made him wrong: Satan was the one to give Larry temptation, and Larry was the one to sin by kissing that boy under the bleachers.
Larry opened the front door, cringing at the noise of rusted metal. There was no chance he could get by his mother without more screaming and crying.
But the screams never began. Instead his mom ran up to him and held Larry in her arms, tears running down her face.
Startled, but not necessarily disliking this change in behavior, Larry asked, “Mom, what happened?”
Larry’s mom responded through sobs, “I-I went to the pastor today and told him about you. Larry, he said he can help you. He told me there is a special summer camp he runs that can help fix people like you, Larry…a camp that can bring kids back to the path of God.”
—---------------------------------
Larry is broken out of memory as the door behind him swings open. A darker skin gentleman with stubble walks out holding a glass of water. The man is wearing a light pink shirt that greatly contrasts with his brown eyes and black hair. Walking down the step, the gentleman sits down next to Larry.
The two sit in silence for a minute, until the man says, “I saw you getting out of there fast. It was my chair you knocked into.”
Larry opens his mouth to respond, but the man beats him to it, “Honestly, it’s fine. Just thought you may need something to drink.”
The man holds up the glass of water, but Larry shakes his head, “I can’t really take off the bandages, but thank you anyway.”
The man gives a curious look, “Is it like plastic surgery or something?”
Larry nods, not really wanting to go into it, “Something like that.”
The two sit in silence for a moment. Letting out a sigh, Larry says, “Listen, I’m sorry, it’s just- -”
The man cuts Larry off, “Something inside messed with you. You don’t have to explain.”
Taking a sip of water, the man continues, “Danny picked all us strays up because the world doesn’t want us. Here, the past is healed and mended, for us to be what we want, and live how we want.”
Larry replies solemnly, “That sounds nice.”
The man nods, “Don’t sweat your reaction today. Healing takes time, and no one is going to fault you if you accidentally bump into a chair on the way to progress.”
Larry is silent, conflicted. On one hand, the idea of being accepted is nice, on the other, well, what if Retconn was punishment for his sin? What if his family was right, what if he doesn’t deserve to be healed?
Standing, Larry says, “Thank you- -” Larry stops, realizing he doesn’t know the man’s name.
The man rises with a smile, “My name is Morris Mingo.” Morris holds out his name for Larry to shake.
Larry shakes the man’s hand, “Larry Trainor.”
“Well Larry,” Morris says, “I hope to see you again, hopefully under better circumstances next time.”
—---------------------
Back at the Nile’s house, or better to say mansion, Rita and Steven are staring at two doors, each going to separate rooms.
Their hands are intertwined unconsciously, their bodies filled with uncertainty. Rita is the first to talk, “I’m sorry. I know we’ve been married for so long, but it just feels…”
Rita doesn’t finish the sentence, not wanting to make the words feel more real by their exiting of the tongue. Instead it is Steven that ends the sentence, “Like everything changed.”
Comfortable silence permeates the room as the two turn to look at each other. “I still love you.” Steven says, his voice almost a whisper.
Tears threaten Rita’s eyes as she responds, “I love you too.”
For both of them, the desire to kiss the other is strong, but both resist. “How about,” Steven suggests, “We start from square one? Build back up to what we once had, that way the new us can get to know each other.”
Rita gives a light smile, “Are you asking me on a date, Mr. Dayton?” she asks in a joking, yet sincere, tone.
“I believe I am. Ms. Farr.” Steven responds in the exact same tone.
Rita’s smile brightens, “Then, I accept.”
A joyish feeling washes over both of them as they go to sleep. They almost don’t recognize the fact that this will be the first time they are sleeping alone in over sixty years as they drift off to sleep.
—--------------
Niles is sitting in his living room parler alone with Irwin. Rita and Steven went up to rest, while Cliff and Larry still haven’t returned to the house.
The two are watching the news, as Niles scribbles on a pad of paper. Irwin asks, “What are you writing?”
Niles stops his scribbling for a moment as he responds, “I am attempting to create a timeline of current events through the news and any books Danny has in order to tell if there are any gaps in the new memories I have.”
“Already?” Irwin asks, “I would think you would be busy processing your memories, not immediately analyzing them for falsehoods. If I learned about my past, first thing I would do is try to connect with it.”
Niles waves Irwin off, “I’ve processed enough. I can’t dilly dally with reminiscing. Retconn could arrive any second, and I refuse to be caught unaware.”
Irwin thinks for a minute, before getting up. Seeing Niles look at him curiously, Irwin explains, “I’m getting a piece of paper myself. Two people trying to understand current events should hopefully make the deciphering process faster.”
Irwin walks away in order to grab paper and a pen, hoping that the help will make Niles’ stress lessen.
Doom Patrol #5- Consequences of Broadcast Televisionl
Author: u/DarkLordJurasus
Book: Doom Patrol
Arc: Another Multiverse Story?
Set: 85
A Retconn Production

"Where are your fucking clothes?!" Jerry screamed as one of the girls ran past him naked, shouting for another one and paying him no mind.
"I just had you get dressed!" he wailed as she vanished through the door to the hall. Another one stepped in through the front door and Jerry rounded on her. "Whose fucking blood is that?!" he demanded. She stared, eyes wide, but didn't answer.
"That's two more! You're up to eleven, now." Inanna said cheerfully. Jerry rounded on her, giving her a glare made of pure frustration.
"Don't give me that look," she said primly, turning away from the girl whose makeup she was doing. "You agreed to this, and you're the one cursing up a storm."
"You don't seem to have any issues cursing yourself," he pointed out.
"That's right. I don't. I've told you before that adding a few extra 'fucks' and 'shits' and 'cocksucking motherfuckers' to your vocabulary wouldn't hurt anything and might be a little cathartic."
"Shit piss fuck cunt cocksucker motherfucker tits," he deadpanned.
Inanna beamed a smile at him. "Eighteen," she said and turned back as he shook his head and went stomping after the naked girl. The one with the blood on her chin and shirt continued to stand next to the front door, looking confused.
"Does this really make men want to mate with you more?" the girl whose makeup she was doing asked. "No, not really," Inanna said. "But it makes you feel prettier, which will make you more confident, and that tends to make the whole process go better as far as you're concerned."
"So when you're done, I will feel more confident?"
"That's the idea," Inanna confirmed.
"Then I will go out and seek a practice mate. How much longer?"
"You will do no such thing until your body's finished growing," Inanna scolded. "Fucking hell, kid, you look like you're about fifteen. Any guy that wants to mate with you right now is a guy you really don't want to mate with. If you really want to practice, I'll speak to Jerry and-"
"Absolutely not!" Jerry said, leading a naked girl out of the hall by a hand around her upper arm. He grabbed the bloody one as well and walked them back to his office, from whence the naked one had come.
"Why not?" the girl asked. Inanna gave her a level stare. "Did you already forget what I just said about men who would want to mate with you? But pay him no mind, I wasn't suggesting he could do it. I mean, he'd probably leave you with internal bleeding, anyways, you're just so tiny. I was going to suggest that he work a little magic to age you up appropriately for a while, so you could find a man who wasn't a hebephile."
"What is a hebephile?" she asked.
"Almost as bad as a pedophile. Worse, in some ways. They're creepier, in any event, at least to me."
"And what is a pedophile?"
"The scum of the earth," Inanna said, as if that settled the matter.
"So I should avoid hebephiles and pedophiles," the girl said. Inanna smiled sweetly at her. "Yes, you should. Now close your eyes, I'm going to do your eyeshadow and them we'll be done."
"I can't wait to see it," the girl said, a bit of excitement creeping into her voice. Inanna gave her smokey blue eyes and then leaned back. "Okay," she said, picking up the mirror and showing the girl her reflection. She squealed loudly and clapped her hands, grinning at her reflection.
Jerry returned, now with two fully dressed girls. He put them both on the couch. "Sit here, and don't fucking move," he instructed sternly.
"Nineteen," Inanna said. Jerry ignored her comment.
"I have to go clean up 'about half' of a dead racoon. Do you think you could get some food going before one of them encounters a neighborhood cat or, god forbid, a neighborhood kid?"
"How about I get them ready to go out? I don't think I have enough food to cook for all fourteen of them."
Jerry nodded, then headed for the garage.
----
It took two humvee to get all of them moving. It also took two hours, because once the others had seen what Inanna did to their sister's face, they all wanted to wear makeup. Fortunately, Aaina had come through, breaking out her own makeup and helping cut the time needed to do them all in half.
Inanna sat in the driver's seat of one humvee with Aaina on the passenger seat. Sarah and Junior were spending the weekend at Eddis and Yarm Junior's new apartment. Some people might find it odd to let two twenty-something boys do their babysitting, but Brekka and Yarm were taking a break, doing some sightseeing in the Sixteenth world, and Inanna trusted those two boys implicitly.
"Dad seems like he's ready to snap," Aaina said. Inanna glanced over to see her looking worried. She laughed. "No, he's not."
"The last time I heard him cursing like this was when we thought you guys were dead," Aaina said. "And I'm sure he'd have killed every single god who got in his way. Tysrane was lucky he only lost a hand..."
"Oh hun," Inanna said. "How much talking and complaining did he do back then?"
"Uhh," Aaina said. "Not much, really. He was more broody than angry."
"Would you say he's acting broody tonight?"
"Ahh, I get you. So what, he's putting on a show of being angry and stressed?"
"Something like that. He's fine, in any event." Inanna turned into the parking lot of the cafeteria and was relieved to note that there was plenty of parking available. She still pulled in near the edge of the lot, taking up two spots with the huge vehicle, but the availability of closer parking meant they wouldn't be too busy.
She climbed out, watching the flood of adolescent Akkorokamui pour out of the back seat. She'd been surprised when Jerry had agreed to watch them so Nick and Zelda could go out on a date. Jerry had given her the impression that he was still holding a grudge over Nick's actions years ago, despite the older man's efforts to make amends in more recent years. But he had gone ahead and volunteered the two of them. And now, he was seemingly paying the price.
She watched as he remained in his humvee after parking and the passenger and rear doors opened. The seven girls with him poured out, and each and every one was naked.
Inanna shook her head and walked over to the driver's side door, to see Jerry behind the wheel with his head against the steering wheel. She opened the door.
"How many?" she asked.
"Twelve more," he admitted. "That's thirty four," she said. He nodded slightly.
"Are you turning your aura on or something?" Inanna asked. He finally lifted his head to look at her.
"No!" he said. "That's what I don't get. They're not trying to do anything, with me or each other! They're just taking their damn clothes off like it's perfectly normal and continuing to chit chat with each other!"
"Well, I mean, it is kinda normal for them to be naked..."
Jerry fixed her with a look. "It's also normal for them to have tentacles instead of legs." None of the girls had reverted to her tentacles. Inanna hadn't even seen one start to, all night. Visually speaking, they'd been a normal gaggle of teenage girls, all evening.
"That's weird, because none of them got undressed in my car," she said.
Jerry threw his hands up. He whimpered. "I don't know how I'm going to deal with thi-Ahh, shit, they're already running inside!"
Inanna turned to see a trio of naked girls entering the restaurant.
"You go get them," Inanna said. "Put a veil of mundanity on them. If they want to go naked, let them go naked, just keep the staff from overreacting." Jerry sighed and nodded, jogging in. Aaina and four of the girls walked up. Inanna counted heads gathered in a group in the middle of the parking lot, chatting excitedly. Seven, five of which were naked. Which meant the girls who'd ridden with her were undressing now.
She sighed. She understood Jerry's frustration. These girls all seemed to have a serious attention deficit disorder, and herding them had been a nightmare so far.
"Aaina," she asked. "Will you find whatever clothing got discarded in the parking lot, and then help everyone who's still dressed get undressed? At least that way, we can keep them from losing their clothes."
"Gonna use a veil?" Aaina asked. "Your father should be using one by now, yes," Inanna said.
"Okay," Aaina turned, spotted a pile of clothing and went to retrieve it.
"We'll be inside," Inanna said. She walked over to the group and pulled the naked ones aside. "The rest of you, let Aaina take your clothes. You can all go naked if you like."
A ragged, high-pitched cheer went up as Inanna shook her head, smiling. "Come on, let's go get some food."
----
There was a bit of a kerfuffle due to the girls entering before Jerry could get the veil settled, but once he did, Inanna was able to smooth things over with the staff and other patrons. Jerry got the tab settled, which was over three hundred dollars for all of them. Inanna considered it money well spent, as the girls took to eating with gusto, and required no real supervision.
They also ate a lot. Which might make the owner upset, but that's the risk one takes when one's only dining option is 'all you can eat'. The cook staff seemed to like the girls, who were mostly bubbly and enthusiastic about trying everything they could.
Jerry was starting to settle down, too. He only racked up four more curse words during dinner. When he and Inanna had eaten, she scooched her chair over to lean against him.
"I think we should do something with them," she said.
Jerry sighed. "Nick told me that the last time they had a night together, Zelda's sister ate one of them, and Zelda in turn, ate her sister. I don't think they'd handle it well. Besides, that's not my-gahh!" Inanna cut him off with a poke in the ribs.
"I didn't mean killing them, you psycho. I meant taking them somewhere to blow off some steam."
Jerry gawked at her. "Are you out of your mind?" he whispered. "We barely survived dinner!"
"Actually, dinner went quite well, compared to keeping them cooped up at the house. That's what gave me the idea."
Jerry heaved a heavy sigh. "I guess you're right. But I have no idea what to do with them."
Inanna turned to Aaina. "Aaina, what do you think?"
"The park," Aaina said without hesitation. "Specifically, Rockville park, down on Churchville Road."
Inanna blinked. "The playground?" she asked. Aaina nodded with a smile. "Exactly."
"I'm not so sure that would be their speed," Inanna objected, but Aaina shook her head.
"Mom, I've been chatting with them all night. I know they look like teenage girls, but for the most part, they talk like little kids. I mean, they're what, six months old?"
"Good point," Inanna said with a proud smile. Aaina smiled back, so she reached over and mussed her hair, eliciting a squeal of protest and a frantic brushing.
"You're such a smart young lady," Inanna said.
----
The girls took to the park with gusto, hooting and hollering as they climbed all over the equipment and chased each other around and just generally had a great time.
"Now," Inanna said as she settled onto a bench with Aaina and Jerry. "All we have to do is make sure none of them run off."
"Okay, this was a damn good idea," Jerry said. "Thank you, both of you. I feel like I can finally breath again."
They sat there, watching the girls play, until a familiar voice sounded from behind them.
"Hey Mister and Missus Williams!" Eddis called. Sara and Junior cried out "Mommy!" in unison.
"Hey," Inanna said as her two youngest children tackled her, hugging and tickling them in response. "What are you guys doing here?"
"The little ones were getting restless, so we decided to bring them out for a bit before bedtime, tire them out some."
"Same," Jerry deadpanned.
"Go play, you too," Inanna said to her kids, shooing them off. She concentrated, summoning a sliver of magic and forming it into a mental warning to the girls.
Anyone who harms the two little kids will get the exact same treatment your aunt got when she ate your sister. And I want to hear fourteen acknowledgements.
A few seconds later, a chorus of fourteen voices chanted the lesson Jerry had impressed upon them at the onset. "Children are friends, not food."
"I meant it!" Inanna shouted.
She kept her eyes on the two little ones, just in case. Several of the girls peeled off and began chatting them up. Within moments, they'd been roped into some sort of game that involved the players chasing each other around screaming "Zombie! Om nom nom!"
"Man," Eddis said as he took a seat on the bench. Yarm Junior offered a hand to Aaina, who took it. He pulled her up and led her to the playground as she laughed at something he said.
"I don't know how you guys do it. I mean, I hear your kids are pretty well behaved from Mom and everyone who knows them, but..."
"They do tend to run you ragged," Jerry commiserated.
"You get used to it," Inanna added.
"Man, I sure hope so. I've always dreamed of having a family. Being a dad, you know?"
"You're gonna be the best dad one day, Eddis," Inanna told him. "Your brother, too. You're both such amazing young men."
"I gotta hit the bathroom," Jerry said, standing up. "Are you guys good without me for a minute?"
Inanna counted heads. Sixteen girls, two boys. "Yup," she said. Jerry nodded and walked over to the bathrooms.
"You mom's gonna love being a grandmother," Inanna said. Eddis laughed. "Yeah, if I can ever find the right girl."
"Don't tell me you're still a virgin," Inanna gasped. Eddis gave her an incredulous look, and then pulled out and tapped his phone a few times. He showed it to her, the screen displaying his contacts. About three quarters of them were women's names with heart emojis at the end. Inanna laughed.
"You certainly take after your father in that regards."
"Yeah. Dad and mom had it a little easier, though. There were only a few people in the tribe, and you pretty much had to pair up young back then."
"Do you remember much of the tribe?" Inanna asked. Eddis shrugged. "Yeah, a bit. Junior doesn't really remember much. We both prefer it here though, I can tell you that."
"Me too," Inanna said.
A moment later, she added. "Well, the bright side is that there's no pressure on you to find the right girl who wants to settle down and have a family."
"What do you mean?" he asked. Inanna pointed to the trees surrounding the park, where Aaina and Yarm Junior could be seen kissing under the canopy.
"Oh!" Eddis gasped.
"You'd better go break it up before Jerry gets out the bathroom. He's liable to have a heart attack, after the evening we've had."

OK, time to sit up straight because I am going to spill some tough love on the men in the community.
This is regarding online dating. This is supposed to serve as a compass for you to navigate yourself correctly through the journey.
This piece is based on three things:
- My own experience with online dating.
- Insights uncovered while helping three cis-gendered, male friends with their dating-app profiles to understand the 'why'(s) and 'how'(s) of Communication and Perception in dating.
- Over a decade of being a Communication and Strategy professional in the corporate sector.
​
(However, if you use dating apps for one-night stands and casual relationships, you can stop here. This post may end up wasting your time.)
​
1) First of all — treat yourself like a 'product' and position yourself accordingly in the market.
Take time to:
- Understand your SWOT.
- Understand your competitor (it is not who you think it is).
- Understand your consumer.
I will elaborate on each one of these later.
​
2) Understand your SWOT:
SWOT stands for Strength, Weakness, Opportunity, and Threat.
Map it out for yourself, and then...
Work on actually having a personality.
What does not count as 'Personality'?
Going to the gym is not your whole personality.
Your bike/car, or your love for them cannot be your whole personality.
Your height, colour of your eyes etc are not your personality.
BladerunneRPG is not your whole personality.
F.R.I.E.N.D.S. cannot be your whole personality.
And your job, definitely, is not your whole personality.
Therefore, when you put 3 out of 5 pictures from your gym, it puts you in a very crowded room that is jam-packed with other gym-goers, lumping your whole personality as a 'Gym Bro'.
When you lack personality, then it is not that you aren't 6'3" tall and hence women aren't choosing you. Learn to see things for what they are.
Ok, but what is Personality then?
Personality is a combination of goals, fears, aspirations, dreams, hopes, likes, dislikes, beliefs etc — attributes that make you 'you'.
Capitalize on each one of these.
Learn to leverage even your weakness by leaning into it.
For example, if you are a guy who is not a fan of English language, and can't for the life of you understand why people don't speak in Hindi, then why are you writing your profile in English, and slogging your posterior off to attract a Starbucks-sipping chica who may not value what you bring to the table?
Instead, channel your inner Harishankar Parsai and write your profile in Hindi.
When you do that, you will have automatically sifted out anyone who is judgmental about your preferred language, and in fact, you may end up attracting someone who will help you paint the town red over this shared interest!
So, keeping everything aside, understand who you are. The better you understand yourself, the easier the dynamics are going to be.
​
3) Learn. To. Write. Sentences.
Complete sentences. With commas, em dashes, and colons.
Do not put five pictures on your profile with one or two words answers to prompts. Learn to put together coherent thoughts.
It shows your ability to express yourself.
Also, expressing yourself is cool.
Stoicism is fine but Zeno of Citium and Marcus Aurelius did not have to spend their life getting left-swiped in the era that is striving to ensure gender equality. Nor were they fighting battles in a hyper-individualistic world.
They had armies to keep them together. Remember this.
​

Language was invented for one reason, boys--- to woo women---and in that endeavor, laziness will not do.
Dead Poet Society

​
4) Re-evaluate your brand-messaging. (Understand your consumer)
Do all/most of your pictures have you posing next to a Merc/BMW etc, and then you cry about attracting gold-diggers?
If you are not looking to attract gold-diggers, tell us what do you bring to the table? Do you have skills required for 'adulting' like keeping a house, planning a meal and ordering for grocery? Do you know basic cooking? If your mom (or someone else) does it all for you, pause dating for a while and contribute to unpaid efforts that go in keeping you alive.
What does it do, you ask?
It softens rough edges of your personality, develops emotional maturity and an ability to estimate and take on the impact of silent mental load. It gives you something real to talk about. It gives the other person something relatable to benchmark you against.
Relationships are much more than booking OYO for a few hours.
(There is a reason your cool collection of Legos cannot be a part of this 'what you bring to the table' exercise. I will explain it later.) Assess if you actually have a personality or are you a humanoid who can code (or whatever else it is that you do), and otherwise bring very little to the table.
​
5) Speaking of Gold Diggers...
Some of you men disintegrate and combust into flames the minute a girl tells you that she is looking for someone who is better off financially (or has a benchmark that requires money).
Why?
Do you not switch your job for better prospects?
Do you not look for someone way hotteprettie smarter than you are?
How are women not allowed to have a richer partner? Please explain.
(I am not asking whether she is a student, banking on dad's money, or hustling at work herself in this case. It does not matter. If you have a wishlist, she too has one. Can you match up? No? Move on then. What is the logic behind becoming bitter about it?)
​
6) To attract the right mate, you need to become the right mate.
For some weird reason, one of the friends I was helping said something that meant something like he will straighten up for the right girl.
Bro, what.
This is not how it works. It, in fact, works the other way round.
You focus on becoming the right person and that takes you one step closer to finding 'the one'. If you are a mess when the right one comes along, they are likely to walk right past you.
You dress up and then go to the bus-stop, wait for the right bus, and board it when it reaches the bus-stop you are at. You don't show up at the bus stop nude and start dressing up the minute your bus pulls up.
​
7) "bUt dOn't wOMEn waNt eQuality?"
They do.
Plus, nobody is trying to rip you off of the four pennies you have saved after 5 years of grind and hustle. Last of all women who have worked their *ss off and fought centuries of patriarchy to get a seat at the table.
Women like to pay for their meals happily, at least the ones I know. However, there will be some who will expect you to foot the bill. It is possible that she is looking for a mate who can afford to take her out for dates totally on his own. She is well within her rights to have this expectation. And you are well within yours to refuse to meet it.
If such is the case, do not let this make you salty and call her a 'gold-digger'.
It is indicative of a poverty-mindset towards money. Instead, use it as marker to understand your relationship with money.
But that aside, if you cannot afford to take both of you out for a coffee/desserts date, take a break from dating and work on your financial health first, because it will keep you stressed and while you cry about having to pay for coffee, another dude would sweep her off her feet because...
...most women may not be looking for you to have 10 billion dollars in your bank account, but in case you both intend on getting married and having a family together, they have a right to assess if you can afford the fact that she can take some time off her work and look after herself (after the delivery) and the baby without your family getting driven to poverty. I understand Maternity leaves and all, but women's brains are prepared to deal with the worst, and they factor in everything and more, even if subconsciously. It contributes to them feeling 'safe' regarding the future. (Not all women, but many. And this is no sin.)
(I am talking about an average scenario. If you are a person whose dynamics worked out in a circumstance different from this, good for you. I have approximated this basis what my guy friends came across in the dating pool. This depends on the privileges, level of education, upbringing, mindset etc, and sometimes varies from person to person within the same family.)
​
8) Speaking of Equality...
... I hope your house-keeping, care-taking, and cooking skills are in alignment with the kind of contribution you are expecting from your partner in terms of finances.
Equality is not a one-way street. And no, I 'let her' drink is not Equality.
​
9) If you are looking for a one-night-stand, state it upfront, the first thing. For some weird reason, the max amount of respect is garnered by guys who mention this right in the beginning. Or, better still, mention it on your profile itself, saves everyone the hassle.
​
10) Emotional Intelligence
There will be m-a-n-y things, in life and on the internet, that you may not like. If at all, this is where you need to practice Stoicism.
Don't believe that there should be more genders than two? Cool, keep scrolling.
Don't understand what is this 'they/them' business in pronouns of individuals? No problem. Put forth your point in a civilized manner and move on. You don't have to dunk on people.
See a 43-year-old unmarried woman asking for advice regarding her love-life? Do you have something constructive to contribute? No? Keep scrolling.
Some lady wore sleeveless to the office? Unless you have something positive to say, keep your opinion to yourself.
See a 63 YO 'aunty' on a dating app? Are you interested? No? Keep Swiping.
Understand that the world does not need your permission exist. (Yes! I know! I am equally baffled!)
​
Your inherent need to straighten the World does two horrible things to you:

• You end up focusing on things that should be none of your business, thereby adding no value to your own life. At worst, you become an outdated version of your parents (who, by the way, might have still been relevant in their times) in a world that needs you to be hyper-agile in your mindset (and regarding your ability to change your opinion and understand the other person's perspective). But I understand that this may be quite a tall order for the majority of the people.

​

• Every time you hyper-fixate on fixing things outside of you, you lose the opportunity that could have either given you a better understanding of something you don't have the first-hand understanding of, or helped you focus on yourself.

​
There is no magic wand to becoming an emotionally intelligent person. In the era of tech and ChatGPTs, your EQ is what will make you stand out. Period.
​
11) Self-worth.
Pause, and understand your worth, (or the lack of it). Don't just randomly hope to be swiped right by anyone. If you are marred by low self-worth, it reflects in every aspect of your life, including how you talk. Take a break from dating and work on your self-worth.
Building self-worth is an inside job.
There is a friend I have who is a Coder by the day and a Baker by the night. Once or twice every month, he invites us over for an evening of chilling around where we also get to sample the latest recipes of cake, quiches, pizzas, and breads he has tried.
The dude is 35YO, the most zen person I know, has never had to be on dating apps because his hobby has everyone chasing him for recipes, 'let's bake together?' (s), ingredients etc. Not a one-night-stand sort of guy, so the street-cred works in his favor. When he dates, he sticks to a lady until things don't work out for whatever genuine reason there is. Once he and the lady part ways, both of them never bad-mouth each other.
Take from that what you will.
Working on your self-worth is stacking up of favorable actions, one after the other. There is no abra-ca-dabra to this.
Also,

• Refrain from becoming someone because of whom women have to close their DMs. Over time, you will lose respect for yourself, and that happens very silently.

​

• There is a difference between speaking the truth and being harsh. Your ability to learn the difference and the art will single-handedly be responsible for success in your profession as well as your personal life.

​

• For some weird reason, a 25 YO man from a Western country is far more emotionally evolved as compared to an Indian man. That is one part of it. The other part of it is that most Indian men are so surrounded by their own type, that they r-e-a-l-l-y will have to break a lot of cycles to even fathom what is expected of them. To break this cycle, educate yourself ruthlessly. Accounts like this may help you break the mould to some extent, but you will still need to break the cycle with respect to your surroundings. Hangout with men who see women in positive light.

​

• The women you are trying to woo, have their standards constantly reset by content from all over the world. You have to understand what you are up against.

​
12) Understand how Reticular Activating System works regarding attracting the right mate.
Reticular Activating System is explained the best here.
And how to hack it is explained here.
From Marketing and Communication stand-point, no brand spends h-o-u-r-s ridiculing and hating on the prospective consumer. Instead, they spare no efforts in getting to know their consumer and then tailoring their offerings to ensure that the consumer sticks around.
This is what I mean when I say know your Comsumer.
(Anyway, what is the point of hating on women throughout the day, and then crying here in the group at night asking for feedback on your dating profile to woo, drumrolls, those same women?)
When it comes to women, your competition is not another man. It is her peace of mind. This is what I mean when I say 'know your Competitor'.
​
13) What makes dating difficult?
Not the process.
It is you hoping that it was easier.
But this is one aspect that demands ruthless growth. Just embrace the pain and hardships of getting left-swiped on and use it to upgrade your mindset and mentality. But all the while, be kind to yourself and know that you are doing your best.
​
14) One last thing...
Analyze if any part of your childhood/teenage was chaotic or traumatic. What we experience in our childhood, if left untreated, goes on to become our 'normal' in adulthood.
So, if you grew up in chaos, peace would seem boring to you. You will constantly look for 'spark' instead of comfort and end up attracting damaged goods.
If your childhood was not peaceful, it may be worthwhile to consider therapy. Therapy is good, it brings out the gunk of the soul that you did not know you were carrying around, all the while stinking because of it.
If you are interested in understanding this better, read Letting Go and Attached.
The thing is, you attract your tribe.
If you are attracted to someone, something in them must have resonated with you. Surprisingly, many times, it is the toxity that binds two people together.
And toxity in oneself is the most difficult to accept.
To stop attracting damaged goods, you will have to heal yourself.
You will be surprised what a therapist can do. You may have to look around for a while before you chance upon a good one though. Twitter has two crowd-sourced list, in case you need: List 1, List 2.
​
Notice how I haven't touched upon topics like what you should write in your bio/profile or what you should message her because these things are a direct manifestation of who you are. They can be 'manufactured' but only to some extent. The mind games last only for so long. After that, you will have to work on yourself.
I hope this makes sense to some extent and someone. Take time to read this. I don't expect anyone of you to get all of it in one go.
If you disagree, happy to hear your point of view.
Thank you for reading!
Have a lovely dating journey.

I wanna start by saying that I love Merle, I love his arc, he's an extremely well written character played by a great actor.
But whenever he's onscreen, I'm not seeing "Daryl's older redneck brother", I'm just seeing Michael Rooker. I've never even seen him in any other role, but just the way he talks (that raspy voice) and carries himself makes this actor stand out like a sore thumb. He's so idiosyncratic that I don't believe him as a Walking Dead character. It's like he's leading his own Michael Rooker TV series that occasionally happens to cross over with Walking Dead. And Daryl calls Michael Rooker his bro for shits and giggles or something. No way are those two brothers. You might as well tell me that Rick's brother is Christopher Walken.

Does the fact that these verses show a remant and very small remnant disprove Universal Reconciliation? No, Christian Universalism remains true. Let me explain why.
Rom 9:27
Esaias also crieth concerning Israel, Though the number of the children of Israel be as the sand of the sea, a remnant shall be saved:
Isa 1:9
9 Except the Lord of hosts had left unto us a very small remnant, we should have been as Sodom, and we should have been like unto Gomorrah.
[/quote]
Rom 9:27. Notice the wording, "concerning Israel"
Remanent refers to being "left surviving". But what did they survive from? Physical death, but not spiritual death. A very small remnanet of mercy was given to avoid the physical destruction that the Lord unleashed on Sodom and Gomorrah.
This type of mercy is different from Ultimate Mercy. Ultimate Mercy refers to the washing of sins. This very small mercy refers to avoiding this physical destruction. Because eventually, even those who avoided this physical destruction were eventually destroyed by natural physical death. But will they be permanently destroyed? No, annihlationism is false. Because the Ultimate Mercy, true love, never fails.
remnant
ὑπόλειμμα (hypoleimma)
Noun - Nominative Neuter Singular
Strong's 5275: To leave behind; pass: To be left surviving
will be saved.
σωθήσεται (sōthēsetai)
Verb - Future Indicative Passive - 3rd Person Singular
If we look at the rest of the verses, the context reveals
Romans 9:28 For the Lord will carry out his sentence on earth with speed and finality.?
Romans 9:29 we would have become like Sodom, we would have been like Gomorrah
Here the "destruction" is referring to the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah Genesis 19. They were physically destroyed, but not spiritually, since when they died, they descended to Sheol, the realm of the dead. This killing by the Lord can also be seen as merciful, because the Lord may have prevented them from suffering due to their sins. The Lord knows people will be saved from Sheol, so He has not truly given up on them.
Earth is like a stage, a story. When the Lord kills, He moves actors off the showfloor and back behind the scenes. The Lord kills to accomplish His purpose, but this is not a permanent killing, but a temporary killing, a temporary death, as all will gain permanent life. No human will ever experience a true permanent death, because all life must return to the LORD God, who created us.
Isa 1:9, also refers to the physical destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah.
Thus the question is, will the people of Sodom and Gomorrah be saved? Yes, eventually they will or have already become believers in Christ by faith alone in Him. Where can they believe? In Sheol, the realm of the dead. Post morterm salvation is still available for them.
Speaking of Isaiah, let's get a verse from it that shows that Universalism is true.
```Isaiah 30:18 Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; therefore He will rise up to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him! ```
The Lord longs, meaning יְחַכֶּ֤ה (yə?ḥak?keh) Strong's 2442: To adhere to, to await. Why does someone wait? Because they expect something to happen, eventually. The Lord expects to give mercy to all people eventually. Otherwise, why would He wait if it will not happen? Thus, all will believe in Lord Christ, who rose up from the dead, and be blessed with salvation, amen.

Prices are firm, but I take off $.75 for every $10 spent (multiple items)
I accept PayPal, Venmo, & Cashapp
Codes are always split/dual portion where applicable, & have no DMI
Only redeem portion you pay for
New additions
14 Blades HD/VU $4.5
3 Extremes (2004) HD/VU $4.5
355 HD/MA $4.5
48 Hrs 4K/VU $6
600 Miles HD/VU $4
65 HD/MA $10
80 for Brady HD/VU $6.5
A Journal for Jordan HD/MA $5
A Man Called Otto HD/MA $6.5
A24 5-Film Set (X, Green Room, It Comes at Night, Hereditary, Witch) HD/VU $15
Ad Astra 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Addams Family (2019) 4K/IT $4.5
Addams Family 2 4K/IT $5
Addams Family With More Mamushka! (1991) 4K/VU $5.5
After Yang HD/VU $4.5
Agent Game 4K/VU $5
Air Force One 4K/MA $6
Alfred Hitchcock 4-Film Set (Psycho, Rear Window, Birds, Vertigo) 4K/MA $18
American Carnage 4K/VU $5
American Gangster (Ext) HD/MA $4
American Underdog HD/VU $4.5
Amsterdam HD/GP $3.5
Anatomy of a Murder 4K/MA $5
Angel Has Fallen 4K/VU $5
Annie (1982) 4K/MA $5.5
Ant-Man & Wasp Quantumania 4K/MA $9.5
Apocalypse Now (Final Cut) 4K/VU $5
Apocalypse Now 3-Cut Set (Thea, Redux, Final) 4K/VU $8.5
Aqua Teen Forever Plantasm HD/MA $5
Armageddon Time HD/MA $6.5
Art of Self-Defense HD/MA $4
Assignment HD/VU $4
Baby Driver HD/MA $4
Babylon 4K/VU $7 or HD/VU $5.5
Backdraft HD/MA $4
Bad Guys HD/MA $4.5
Banshees of Inisherin HD/MA $4.5
Barb & Star go to Vista Del Mar HD/VU $4
Batman HD/MA $4
Batman & Superman Battle of Super Sons HD/MA $6
Battle Royale (2000) HD/VU $4.5
Beast HD/MA $5
Bedknobs & Broomsticks HD/GP $3.5
Belly 4K/VU $5.5
Best of Enemies HD/IT $3.5
Billy Lynn's Long Halftime Walk HD/MA $4
Birdman HD/MA $3.5
Black Adam HD/MA $5
Black Panther Wakanda Forever HD/GP $3.5
Black Phone HD/MA $5
Blacklight HD/MA $4
Blindspotting 4K/VU $5.5
Blood Money (2017) HD/VU $3.5
Blues Brothers HD/MA $4
Boogie 4K/MA $6.5
Bram Stoker's Dracula 4K/MA $5.5
Brian Banks HD/MA $3
Bride of Frankenstein (1935) HD/MA $3.5
Bullet Train HD/MA $5
Bumblebee HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Captain Underpants First Epic Movie HD/MA $2.5
Captive State HD/MA $4.5
Casablanca 4K/MA $6
Casino HD/MA $4
Cats (2019) HD/MA $4
Cecil B. Demented HD/VU $4.5
Charade HD/MA or IT $4
Charlie Brown 4-Film Set (A Boy Named Charlie Brown, Bon Voyage, Snoopy Come Home, Race for Your Life) HD/VU $15
Christmas Classics Set (Home Alone, Jingle All Way, Miracle on 34th Street '94, A Christmas Carol '84) HD/MA $18
Chronicle HD/MA $4
Chronicles of Riddick HD/IT $4
Cinderella (2021) HD/MA $4.5
Clerks 3 4K/VU $5
Clifford Big Red Dog HD/VU $4
Clint Eastwood A Cinematic Legacy HD/MA $3.5
Colony 4K/VU $5
Coming to America 4K/VU $5
Conan Barbarian (2011) 4K/VU $5
Cotton Club Encore 4K/VU $5.5
Craft Legacy HD/MA $4.5
Creed 3 4K/VU $11.5 or HD/VU $9
Creed 3 HD/VU $9
Criminal HD/VU $3.5
Cube (1997) HD/VU $5
Damsel HD/VU $4.5
Dangerous 4K/VU $4.5
Daniel Craig 4-Film Collection HD/VU $12
Dark Crystal 4K/MA $6
Dark Places HD/VU $4
Death of Me HD/VU $4
Death on Nile HD/GP $3.5
Detective Knight Independence 4K/VU $6.5
Detective Knight Redemption 4K/VU $5.5
Detective Knight Rogue 4K/VU $5.5
Die in a Gunfight 4K/VU $5
Dig 4K/VU $6
Doctor Strange in Multiverse of Madness HD/GP $3.5
Dog HD/VU $4.5
Dolittle 4K/MA $5
Don Verdean HD/VU $4.5
Don't Look Now HD/VU $4.5
Downton Abbey A New Era HD/MA $4.5
Dracula (1931) HD/MA $3.5
Dream a Little Dream HD/VU $4
Drive HD/MA $3.5
Duck Dynasty Wedding Special HD/VU $4
Earth Girls are Easy HD/VU $4
Eddie Eagle HD/MA $4
Eighth Grade HD/VU $4
Elvis HD/MA $4.5
Empire of Light HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Equalizer HD/MA $3
Escape from LA 4K/VU $5.5
Escape Room Tournament of Champions (Thea & Ext) HD/MA $5
Escape Field 4K/VU $5.5
Everything Must Go HD/VU $4
Expired 4K/VU $5
F9 Fast Saga (Thea & Ext) HD/MA $5.5
Fabelmans HD/MA $6.5
Fair Game (Dir Cut) HD/VU $4
Fantastic Beasts Secrets of Dumbledore HD/MA $4.5
Farewell HD/VU $4
Fast & Furious Tokyo Drift HD/MA $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Fatherhood HD/MA $4
Favourite HD/MA $4.5
Fear of Rain 4K/VU $5.5
Field of Dreams HD/MA $4
Finding You 4K/VU $5
Flashback (2020) HD/VU $4
Forbidden Kingdom HD/VU $4.5
Ford v Ferrari HD/MA $4
Forrest Gump HD/VU $3.5
Fortress Sniper's Eye HD/VU $4
Freaky HD/MA $4.5
Friends With Kids HD/VU $4
From Here to Eternity 4K/MA $5.5
Ghost in Shell (1995) 4K/VU $5
Ghost In Shell 2.0 HD/VU $4.5
Giant 4K/MA $5.5
Gift HD/IT $3.5
Glass HD/MA $4
Gloria Bell HD/VU $4
Godfather HD/VU $4
Godfather Part 2 4K/VU $5.5
Good House 4K/VU $6
Great Wall HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Green Inferno HD/IT $3.5
Green Lantern Beware My Power HD/MA $4
Greenland 4K/IT $5
Guns Akimbo HD/VU $4.5
Habit 4K/VU $5.5
Halloween Curse of Michael Myers HD/VU $4
Halloween Ends 4K/MA $7 or HD/MA $5.5
Happy Death Day HD/MA $4.5
Hard Luck Love Song 4K/VU $5.5
Harry & Hendersons HD/MA or IT $4
Heat (Dir Cut) (1995) 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Hellbenders HD/VU $4.5
Hellboy Animated Double Feature (Sword of Storms, Blood & Iron) 4K/VU $7.5
Hellraiser Judgment HD/VU $4
Highlander 4K/VU $5.5
Honk for Jesus. Save Your Soul. HD/MA $4.5
House Next Door Meet Blacks 2 4K/VU $5.5
House of 1000 Corpses HD/VU $4
House with a Clock in Its Walls HD/MA $4
Humans HD/VU $4.5
Hunger Games Mockingjay Pt 2 HD/VU $3.5
Hunt for Red October 4K/VU $5.5
I Love You Phillip Morris HD/VU $4.5
Ides of March HD/MA $3.5
In Secret (2014) HD/VU $4.5
In Blood HD/MA $4
Incredible Hulk HD/MA $4
Independence Day (1996) 4K/MA $5.5
Indiana Jones & Raiders of Lost Ark HD/VU $4
Inhabitant HD/VU $4.5
Interview HD/MA $3.5
Iron Man & Hulk Heroes United HD/GP $3.5
Isle of Dogs HD/MA $4
It Happened One Night 4K/MA $5.5
Italian Job 4K/VU $6.5
Jackass Forever HD/VU $4.5
Jobs HD/IT $3.5
Jobs HD/MA $3.5
Joe Kidd HD/MA or IT $4
Jordan Peele 3-Film Collection (Nope, Us, Get Out) HD/MA $11
Journey to West Conquering Demons HD/VU $3.5
Juliet, Naked 4K/VU $5.5
Ju-On Grudge HD/VU $4.5
Jurassic World 6-Film Collection (Dominion Thea & Ext) HD/MA $18
Kama Sutra HD/VU $4.5
Kill Zone (2005) HD/VU $4.5
King of Staten Island HD/MA $4
King Richard 4K/MA $5.5
King's Man 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/GP $3.5
Knock at Cabin HD/MA $7.5
Knock Knock HD/VU $3
Knowing 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Knowing/Push Double Feature HD/VU $7.5
Labyrinth HD/MA $4.5
Lair of White Worm HD/VU $4.5
Lara Croft Tomb Raider 4K/IT $4
Last Duel HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Last Flag Flying HD/MA $4
Last Picture Show 4K/MA $5.5
Let Them All Talk 4K/MA $5.5
Lightyear HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Limey (1999) 4K/VU $5.5
Little Mermaid 4K/MA $5.5
Locked Down 4K/MA $5.5
Lyle Lyle Crocodile HD/MA $5
Mack & Rita HD/VU $4.5
Mad Max 2-4 Set 4K/VU $14
Mad Men Complete Series HD/VU $35
Magic Mike's Last Dance HD/MA $6.5
Magnificent Seven 4-Film Set (1960, Return, Guns, Ride) HD/VU $13
Man of Tai Chi HD/VU $4
Man Who Fell To Earth (1976) 4K/VU $6
Manchester by Sea HD/VU $3.5
Marksman HD/MA $4
Marlowe HD/MA $7.5
Mask of Zorro 4K/MA $6
Mauritanian 4K/IT $5
Meatballs HD/VU $4
Memory HD/MA $4
Men HD/VU $4.5
Men in Black 3 HD/MA $3
Menu HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
MIB International HD/MA $3.5
Mickey & Minnie 10 Classic Shorts HD/MA $5.5 or HD/GP $5
Mid-Century 4K/VU $5
Midsommar HD/VU $4
Mimic (Dir Cut) HD/VU $4
Miracle on 34th Street (1947) HD/MA $4
Mommy HD/VU $4
Moonfall 4K/VU $4.5
Morbius HD/MA $4
Moving On HD/VU $5.5
Mrs Harris Goes to Paris 4K/MA $6
My Brilliant Friend Season 1 HD/VU $4
Nashville (1975) HD/VU $4
Needle in a Timestack 4K/VU $5.5
Night House HD/GP $4
No Country for Old Men HD/VU $4
No Sudden Move 4K/MA $6
Nope HD/MA $5.5
Northman HD/MA $4
Oliver! 4K/MA $5
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood HD/MA $3.5
Pacific Rim Uprising HD/MA $4
Paradise Highway 4K/VU $5.5
Paranormal Activity 1-8 Collection HD/VU $22
Paranormal Activity Ghost Dimension (Unr) HD/VU $4.5
Parasite HD/MA $4
Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 HD/MA $3.5
Paw Patrol Movie HD/VU $4.5
Percy Jackson Sea of Monsters HD/MA $3
Perfectos Desconocidos HD/VU $4
Phantom Thread HD/MA $4
Piano (1993) HD/VU $4.5
Pretty in Pink HD/VU $3.5
Prey for Devil 4K/VU $6
Prince of Egypt HD/MA $4.5
Princess Bride HD/IT $4.5
Proud Mary HD/MA $3.5
Pulp Fiction 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Push 4K/VU $6
Raid Redemption (Thea & Unr) HD/MA $4.5
Ran (1985) 4K/VU $5.5
Ratatouille HD/GP $4
Red Heat (1988) 4K/VU $5
Redline (2010) HD/VU $4.5
Reign of Assassins HD/VU $4.5
Repo Genetic Opera HD/VU $4.5
Rescuers Down Under HD/GP $4.5
Rescuers HD/MA $5 or HD/GP $4.5
Reservoir Dogs 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Retaliation (2017) HD/VU $4
Right One 4K/VU $5.5
Robots HD/MA $4
Rocky Knockout Collection 1-4 (Rocky IV w/ Thea & Rocky vs Drago Ultimate Cut) 4K/VU $20
Rules of Attraction HD/VU $4
Rumble HD/VU $5
Running Man 4K/VU $5.5
Saint Maud HD/VU $4.5
Sausage Party HD/MA $3.5
Scott Pilgrim vs World HD/MA $4 or 4K/IT $4.5
Scream HD/VU $4.5
Scream 4 HD/VU $4
Searching HD/MA $4
Secret Garden (2020) 4K/IT $5
Secret in Their Eyes HD/VU or IT $3
Sense & Sensibility 4K/MA $5
Seven Psycopaths HD/MA $4
Shawshank Redemption 4K/MA $5.5
She Said HD/MA $6.5
Shooter 4K/VU $5
Silent Night, Deadly Night 3-Film Set (3-5) HD/VU $8
Silent Twins 4K/MA $6
Silk Road 4K/VU $5
Silver Linings Playbook HD/MA $2.5
Sing Street HD/VU $4
Skeleton Twins HD/VU $4.5
Smile HD/VU $5.5
Smokin' Aces 4K/MA $5.5
Snake Eyes G.I. Joe Origins 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Son of God HD/MA $3
Sonic Hedgehog 2 HD/VU $4.5
Source Code 4K/VU $5.5
Spartacus HD/MA $3.5
Spectre HD/MA $3.5
Spider-Man No Way Home 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Spinning Man HD/VU $4
Spirit HD/VU $4
Spontaneous HD/VU $4.5
Starship Troopers 4K/MA $6
Strange World HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Stripes 4K/MA $5
Super Mario Bros Movie HD/MA $10.5
Taken 2 HD/MA $3.5
Tar HD/MA $6
Teen Spirit (2019) HD/MA $4
Teen Titans Go! & DC Super Hero Girls Mayhem Multiverse HD/MA $6
Teeth HD/VU $4.5
Ten Commandments (1923) HD/VU $4
Ten Commandments (1956) HD/VU $4
Tetro HD/VU $4
Thing (1982) 4K/MA $5.5
Thor Love & Thunder 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/GP $3.5
Till 4K/IT $7
Time Freak HD/VU $4
Tomb Raider Cradle of Life 4K/IT $5.5
Top Gun Maverick 4K/VU $6 or HD/VU $4.5
Touched With Fire HD/VU $4.5
Training Day 4K/MA $6
Transformers Dark of Moon 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Tucker Man & His Dream 4K/VU $5
Turning Red HD/GP $3
Twilight 1-3 (Ext Editions) HD/VU $10
Twixt HD/MA $4
Umma HD/MA $4.5
Uncut Gems HD/VU $4
Underwater HD/MA $4.5
Up (2009) 4K/MA $6 or HD/GP $4
Venom Let There Be Carnage HD/MA $4
Virtuoso 4K/VU $5
Vivo HD/MA $4.5
Voyagars 4K/VU $5
W. HD/VU $4
War of Worlds 4K/VU $5.5
War on Everyone HD/VU $4
Warhunt 4K/VU $4.5
Weekend HD/VU $4
What We Did on our Holiday HD/VU $4
Where Crawdads Sing HD/MA $4.5
White Christmas HD/VU $4
Whitney Houston I Wanna Dance with Sombody HD/MA $5.5 or SD/MA $3
Wicker Man (1973) HD/VU $4.5
Winnie Pooh Springtime with Roo HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Wolf Man (1941) HD/MA $3.5
Woman King HD/MA $5.5
Women Talking 4K/IT $7
X-Men Days of Future Past Rogue Cut 4K/IT $5.5
All other movies (A-Z)
101 Dalmatians HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
12 Years a Slave HD/MA $3.5
13 Hours Soldiers of Benghazi HD/VU $2.5
1917 HD/MA $3.5
2 Fast 2 Furious HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
2 Guns HD/VU or IT $2.5
21 Jump Street HD/MA $3
3 From Hell (Unr) 4K/VU $4 or HD/VU $2.5
310 to Yuma 4K/VU $5
31 (2016) HD/VU $2.5
47 Meters Down HD/IT $3.5
47 Meters Down Uncaged HD/VU $3.5
47 Ronin HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
50/50 HD/VU $4
71 HD/VU $4
A Clockwork Orange 4K/MA $5
A Dog's Purpose HD/IT $3
A Good Day to Die Hard (Ext) HD/VU $2.5
A Most Wanted Man HD/VU $3.5
A Quiet Place HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
A Quiet Place Part 2 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
A Wrinkle in Time HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Abominable 4K/MA $5.5
About Time HD/VU or IT $3.5
Action Point HD/IT $2
Adore HD/IT $3.5
Adventures Of TinTin HD/IT $2.5
After Earth HD/MA $3
Age of Adaline HD/VU or IT $3
Aladdin (2019) 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Alex Cross HD/VU or IT $2
Alfred Hitchcock 5-Film Set (Saboteur, Shadow of Doubt, Trouble with Harry, Marnie, Family Plot) 4K/MA $24
Alice Through Looking Glass HD/GP $3
Alien 6-Film Collection HD/MA $18
Alien Covenant HD/MA $2.5
Alien Resurrection HD/MA $4
Alita Battle Angel 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
All Eyez on Me HD/IT $3
All Money in World HD/MA $3.5
Allied HD/VU $3.5
Aloha HD/MA $3.5 or SD/MA $1
Alvin & Chipmunks Road Chip HD/MA $2.5
Amazing Spider-Man 2 HD/MA $4
Amazing Spider-Man HD/MA $3.5 or SD/MA $1.5
American Assassin 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
American Frontier Trilogy (Sicario, Wind River, Hell or High Water) HD/VU $7.5
American Hustle SD/MA $1.5
American Made 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
American Night HD/VU $4
American Reunion HD/VU or IT $3
American Ultra HD/IT $4
Anchorman 2 Legend Continues HD/VU or IT $2.5
Angel Heart 4K/VU $5.5
Angel of Mine 4K/VU $5.5
Anna 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Anna Karenina HD/IT $3.5
Annie (2014) HD/MA $3.5 or SD/MA $1.5
Annihilation HD/VU $3
Antebellum 4K/VU $5
Ant-Man & Wasp HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Ant-Man HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Apollo 13 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Arctic HD/MA $4
Army of One HD/VU $3
Arnold Schwarzenegger 6-Film Collection (Last Stand, Total Recall, T-2, Red Heat, Maggie, Hercules in NY) HD/VU $14
Arrival HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Ash vs Evil Dead Season 3 HD/VU $5
Assassination Nation HD/MA $3.5
Assassin's Creed HD/MA $3
Atomic Blonde 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3
August Osage County HD/VU $3
Avengers Age of Ultron HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Avengers Endgame HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Avengers HD/GP $3
Avengers Infinity War HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Back to Future 3 HD/MA $3.5
Back to Future Trilogy 4K/MA $14 or HD/MA $9.5
Bad Boys for Life HD/MA $4
Bad Grandpa HD/VU or IT $2.5
Bad Words HD/IT $3
Bambi 2 HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Bambi HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Bangkok Dangerous HD/VU $4
Bank Job HD/VU $3.5
Barbie & Her Sisters in Great Puppy Adventure HD/VU or IT $3.5
Barbie in Princess Power HD/IT $3.5
Barbie Star Light Adventure HD/IT $3.5
Battle of Year HD/MA $3.5
Battleship HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Baywatch HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Beatriz at Dinner HD/VU $4.5
Beauty & Beast (1991) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Beauty & Beast (2017) HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Before I Fall HD/VU or IT $3.5
Begin Again HD/VU $3.5
Beirut HD/MA $3.5
Ben-Hur (2016) HD/VU or IT $3.5
BFG HD/MA $3.5
Big Eyes HD/VU $3.5
Big Hero 6 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Big Lebowski 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Big Little Lies Season 1 HD/GP $2.5
Big Short HD/VU or IT $3.5
Big Wedding HD/VU or IT $3
Birth of a Nation HD/MA $3.5
Black Panther 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
Black Widow HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Blackhat HD/IT $3.5
Blair Witch (2016) HD/IT $2.5
Blair Witch Project (1999) HD/VU $4
Blockers HD/MA $3.5
Bloodshot HD/MA $4
Boardwalk Empire Season 1 HD/VU or IT $4
Bombshell 4K/VU $5
Book Club 4K/IT $3
Book Club HD/VU $2.5
Book of Life HD/MA $3.5
Born a Champion 4K/VU $5
Boss Baby 2-Film Set HD/MA $6
Boss Baby HD/MA $2.5
Bourne Identity HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Bourne Legacy HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
Bourne Supremacy HD/VU $3.5
Bourne Ultimatum 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Boy 2 HD/IT $3.5
Boy Erased HD/MA $4
Boy HD/IT $3.5
Boyhood HD/VU or IT $2.5
Braveheart HD/VU $3.5
Braven HD/VU $4
Breakfast Club HD/IT $4
Breakthrough HD/MA $3
Burnt HD/VU $3.5
Butler HD/VU $3
Bye Bye Man (Unr) HD/IT $2.5
Cabin in Woods 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $2.5
Call of Wild 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
Captain America Civil War HD/GP $2.5
Captain America First Avenger HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Captain America Winter Soldier HD/GP $3.5
Captain Marvel HD/GP $2
Captain Phillips HD/MA $3.5 or SD/MA $1.5
Carol HD/VU $4
Cars 3 HD/GP $2.5
Case for Christ HD/IT $2.5
Chaos Walking 4K/VU $5
Chicago (Diamond Edition) HD/VU $4
Children (2008) HD/VU $4
Christopher Robin HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Cloverfield 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Coco HD/GP $2.5
Cold Pursuit 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Collection HD/VU $3.5
Columbiana (Unr) HD/MA $4
Come & Find Me HD/VU $4
Commuter 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Company of Heroes HD/MA $4
Contraband HD/IT $3
Cooties HD/VU $4
Cornetto Trilogy (Shaun of Dead, Hot Fuzz, World's End) 4K/MA $15
Counselor HD/MA $4
Courier 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Crank 4K/VU $5.5
Crawl HD/VU $3
Crimson Peak HD/IT $3.5
Croods HD/VU $3.5
Cruella HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
D Train 4K/IT $4
Daddy's Home 2 HD/IT $3
Daddy's Home HD/VU $3
Dark Tower HD/MA $3.5
Darkest Hour (2017) 4K/MA $5.5
Darkest Minds HD/MA $4
Darkness HD/IT $3
Dawn of Planet of Apes HD/MA $3.5
Daybreakers 4K/VU $5.5
Deadpool 2 (w/Super Duper Cut) HD/MA $4
Deadpool HD/MA $2.5
Dear White People HD/VU $3.5
Deepwater Horizon 4K/IT $3
Dementia 13 (Dir Cut) HD/VU $4
Despicable Me 2 HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Despicable Me 3 4K/MA or IT $5
Despicable Me 4K/IT $5
Detroit HD/MA $3.5
Devil's Due HD/MA $3.5
Dilemma HD/VU $3.5
Dirty Dancing 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Disney Animated Short Films Collection HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Divergent HD/VU $1.5 or 4K/IT $2 or SD/VU $0.5
Divergent Allegiant HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Divergent Insurgent HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Django Unchained HD/VU $3
Do Right Thing 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Doctor Strange HD/GP $2.5
Dom Hemingway HD/MA $3.5
Don't Worry, He Won't Get Far on Foot HD/VU $4
Doom (Unr) 4K/MA $5.5
Doorman HD/VU $3.5
Doors 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Dora & Lost City of Gold HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Downton Abbey Movie HD/MA $3.5
Dracula Untold HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Draft Day HD/VU $3.5
Dragged Across Concrete HD/VU $3.5
Dreamkatcher HD/VU $4
Dredd 4K/VU or IT $4 or HD/VU $2.5
Duel (2016) HD/VU $3.5
Duff SD/VU $1.5
Dumbo (2019) HD/GP $3
Dune 4K/MA $5.5
Dying of Light HD/VU $2.5
E.T. Extra Terrestrial 4K/VU or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Edge of Seventeen HD/VU or IT $3
Edge of Tomorrow 4K/MA $5
Edward Scissorhands HD/MA $3.5
El Chicano HD/MA $4
Emoji Movie HD/MA $3
Encanto 4K/MA $4 or 4K/GP $3.5
Ender's Game HD/VU $2.5
Enemy at Gates HD/VU $4
Enough Said HD/MA $3.5
Epic HD/MA $3
Escape Plan HD/VU $2
Eternals HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Everest 4K/MA or IT $4.5
Ex Machina HD/VU $3
Exodus Gods & Kings HD/MA $3.5
Expendables 2 HD/VU or IT $1
Expendables 3 (Thea) HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
Extreme Prejudice (1987) HD/VU $4
Fast & Furious (2009) HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Fast & Furious 6 (Ext) HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
Fast & Furious 6-film Collection HD/VU $12.5
Fast & Furious 7-film Collection HD/VU $14
Fast & Furious 8-film Collection (9 Films) HD/MA $17.5
Fast & Furious 9-film Collection (11 Films) HD/MA $20
Fast & Furious HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Fast Color 4K/VU $5.5
Fast Five (Ext) HD/IT $2.5
Fatale (2020) 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Fate of Furious (Ext) HD/VU $2
Fate of Furious (Thea) HD/VU or IT $1.5
Fault in Our Stars HD/MA $3.5
Fences HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Ferdinand HD/MA $3.5
Fifty Shades Darker (Unr) HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Fifty Shades Freed HD/MA $4
Fifty Shades of Grey (Unr) HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Fighting with my Family HD/IT $4
Finding Dory HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Finding Nemo HD/GP $3.5
Finest Hours HD/GP $3
First Blood 4K/VU $5
First Man HD/MA $4
Flight HD/VU or IT $3
Florence Foster Jenkins HD/VU or IT $3
Footloose (2011) HD/IT $3
Forever My Girl HD/IT $3
Fortress HD/VU $4
Four Kids & It HD/VU $3.5
Fox & Hound 2 HD/MA $4
Frank & Lola HD/VU or IT $3
Frankenstein (1931) HD/VU $3.5
Free Guy HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
French Dispatch HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Friday 13th Pt 3 HD/VU $3.5
Frozen (Sing-Along Edition) HD/MA $2 or HD/GP $1.5
Frozen 2 4K/MA $4 or HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Frozen Ground (2013) HD/VU $3.5
Frozen HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Furious 7 (Ext) HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
Fury HD/MA $3.5
G.I. Joe Retaliation HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Gambit (2012) HD/MA $4
Gambler HD/VU or IT $3
Gemini Man 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Gentlemen 4K/IT $4.5
Get Out HD/MA $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Ghost in Shell (2017) 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Ghost Team One HD/VU or IT $3.5
Ghostbusters (1984) HD/MA $3.5
Ghostbusters 2 HD/MA $3.5
Ghostbusters Afterlife HD/MA $4
Girl on Train HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Girl With All Gifts HD/VU $4
Girls Trip HD/VU or IT $2
Glass Castle 4K/VU $5.5
God's Not Dead 2 HD/MA or IT $2.5
God's Not Dead A Light in Darkness HD/MA $3
Gods of Egypt HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Gold (2016) HD/VU or IT $2.5
Gone Girl HD/MA $4
Good Dinosaur HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Good Kill HD/VU or IT $3.5
Grace Unplugged HD/VU $2
Greatest Showman HD/MA $3.5
Green Mile 4K/MA $5.5
Grey HD/VU or IT $3
Guardians of Galaxy Vol 1 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Guardians of Galaxy Vol 2 HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Guest House (2020) 4K/VU $5
Guilt Trip HD/IT $3
Gunman HD/MA $3
Hacksaw Ridge HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Hail, Caesar! HD/IT $3
Halloween (2018) HD/MA $3
Hammer of Gods HD/VU $2
Hands of Stone HD/VU $3.5
Hannibal Season 1 HD/VU $5
Hard Target 2 HD/IT $1.5
Hardcore Henry HD/VU or IT $3.5
Hate U Give HD/MA $4
Hateful Eight HD/VU $3.5
Heat HD/MA $3
Heaven is for Real SD/MA $1.5
Hell Fest 4K/VU $5
Hell or High Water HD/VU $2.5
Hellboy (2019) 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Hercules (1997) HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Hercules (2014) HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Here Comes Boom HD/MA $3.5
Hidden Figures HD/MA $3
Hillsong Let Hope Rise HD/IT $2
Hitman (Uncut) & Hitman 47 Bundle HD/MA $7
Hitman's Bodyguard HD/VU $3.5
Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Hocus Pocus HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Home Again HD/MA $3
Home Alone 2 HD/MA $3.5
Home Alone HD/MA $3.5
Homesman HD/VU $3
Honey 2 HD/VU $3
Hop HD/MA or IT $3
Hope Springs HD/MA $2.5 or SD/MA $1
Hostiles 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Hot Fuzz HD/VU $4
Hotel Mumbai HD/MA $4
Hotel Transylvania HD/MA $3.5
Hours (2013) HD/VU $4
How Grinch Stole Christmas (2000) 4K/IT $4
How to Train Your Dragon 2 HD/MA $2.5
How to Train Your Dragon HD/VU $3.5
How to Train Your Dragon Trilogy HD/MA $9
Hugo HD/VU or IT $3
Hunger Games 4-Film Collection HD/VU $8
Hunger Games Catching Fire HD/VU $1.5 or 4K/IT $2 or SD/VU $0.5
Hunger Games HD/VU $1.5 or 4K/IT $2 or SD/VU $0.5
Hunger Games Mockingjay Part 1 HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3 or SD/VU $1
Hunter Killer 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Huntsman Winter's War (Ext) HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
I Can Only Imagine HD/VU $4
I Feel Pretty HD/IT $2
I Frankenstein HD/VU or IT $2.5
Ice Age Collision Course HD/MA $3
Incredibles 2 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Incredibles HD/GP $3.5
Independence Day Resurgence HD/MA $2.5
Indiana Jones & Temple of Doom 4K/VU $5.5
Indignation HD/VU $4
Initiation 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Inside Out HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Instant Family 4K/IT $3.5
Interstellar HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Into Woods HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Invisible Man (1933) HD/MA $3.5
Invisible Man (2020) 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Iron Man HD/GP $3.5 or HD/GP $2
Iron Mask (2019) HD/VU $4.5
It Follows HD/VU $3.5
It's a Wonderful Life 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Jack Reacher HD/VU $3
Jack Reacher Never Go Back HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Jack Ryan Shadow Recruit HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Jacob's Ladder HD/VU $4
Jarhead 3 Siege (Unr) HD/IT $2.5
Jason Bourne HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Jason Statham 4-Film (War, Crank 1 & 2, Transporter 3) HD/VU $10
Jaws 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Jeff Who Lives at Home HD/VU $4
Jersey Boys HD/MA $2.5
Jesus Music HD/VU $3.5
Jigsaw 4K/VU $4.5
Joe HD/VU $3.5
John Wick 1 & 2 Bundle HD/VU $4
John Wick 3 Parabellum 4K/VU $4.5
John Wick Chapter 2 HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
John Wick HD/VU $2
John Wick Trilogy (Parabellum 4K) HD/VU $9
Jonah Hex HD/MA $4.5
Joy HD/MA $3
Judy 4K/VU $5
Jungle Book (2016) 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Jungle Cruise HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Jurassic Park 3 HD/VU $3.5
Jurassic Park 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Jurassic World 5-Film Collection HD/MA $14
Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3
Jurassic World HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Justice (2017) HD/VU or IT $3
Kevin Hart Let Me Explain HD/VU or IT $3
Kick-Ass 4K/VU $5.5 or HD/VU $4
Kid Who Would Be King 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Kidnap HD/VU or IT $2.5
Killer Elite HD/IT $3
Killerman HD/VU $4
Kin (2018) 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
King Kong (2005) 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Kingsman Golden Circle 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3
Kingsman Secret Service 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Knick Season 1 HD/IT $3.5
Knick Season 2 HD/IT $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Kung Fu Panda 3 HD/MA $3
La La Land HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Labor Day HD/VU or IT $3
Lady & Tramp HD/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $4
Lady Macbeth HD/VU $4.5
Last Christmas HD/MA $4
Last Exorcism HD/VU $4
Last Knights HD/VU $3.5 or SD/VU $1.5
Last Man (2019) HD/VU $4
Last Stand HD/IT $2
Last Vegas HD/MA $3.5
Last Witch Hunter HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Leatherface HD/VU $4
Legend of Hercules 4K/IT $3
Leprechaun 7-Film Collection HD/VU $12
Les Miserables (2012) HD/VU or IT $2
Let Me Explain HD/IT $2.5
Let's be Cops HD/MA $3.5
Life (2017) HD/MA $3.5
Life of Crime HD/VU $3.5
Life of Pi 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA or IT $3.5
Light of My Life HD/IT $3.5
Like a Boss HD/VU $3.5
Lilo & Stitch 2 Stitch Has a Glitch HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Lilo & Stitch HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Lincoln Lawyer 4K/VU $6.5 or HD/VU $4
Lion King (1994) HD/GP $3
Lion King (2019) 4K/MA $4 or HD/GP $2
Logan HD/MA $3
Logan Lucky 4K/MA or IT $4.5
Lone Ranger HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Lone Survivor HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Long Shot HD/VU $3.5
Longest Ride HD/MA $3
Longest Week HD/VU $3.5
Looper HD/MA $3.5
Lorax (1972) HD/MA $5
Lorax HD/VU $3
Lords of Salem HD/VU $4
Lost World Jurassic Park HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Love & Monsters HD/VU $4
Love Coopers HD/VU or IT $4
Love, Simon HD/MA $3.5
Loving HD/VU or IT $3.5
Luca HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Lucy HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Mad Max 2 Road Warrior 4K/VU $5.5
Madagascar 3 Europe's Most Wanted HD/VU or IT $3
Magnificent Seven (2016) HD/VU $3
Maleficent 4K/MA $4 or HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Maleficent Mistress of Evil HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Mama HD/IT $3
Man Who Shot Liberty Vance 4K/VU $5.5
Mandela Long Walk to Freedom HD/VU $4
Martian HD/MA $3.5
Mary Poppins (1964) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Mary Poppins Returns HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Max Steel HD/IT $3
Maze Runner HD/MA $3.5
Maze Runner Death Cure HD/MA $3.5
McKenna Shoots for Stars HD/IT $2
Mechanic Resurrection HD/VU $2.5
Megan Leavey HD/IT $3
Midnight Sun HD/MA $3.5
Midway 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Mile 22 HD/IT $3
Million Dollar Arm HD/GP $2.5
MindGamers HD/MA or IT $3.5
Minions 4K/MA or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Misconduct HD/VU $2.5
Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children HD/MA $3
Missing Link HD/MA $4
Mission Impossible 3 4K/VU $4.5
Mission Impossible 4 Ghost Protocol HD/VU $2
Mission Impossible 5 Rogue Nation HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Mission Impossible 6 Fallout 4K/VU or IT $4.5
Mission Impossible 6-film Set 4K/VU $23 or HD/VU $17
Moana HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Moneyball HD/MA $3
Monkey Kingdom HD/MA $3
Monster High Electrified HD/VU or IT $2.5
Monsters University HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Monuments Men HD/MA $3.5
Mortal Engines 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Mortal HD/VU $4
Mortal Instruments City of Bones HD/MA $3 or SD/MA $1.5
Mother! HD/VU $2.5
Mother's Day HD/IT $2.5
Much Ado About Nothing (2013) HD/VU $4
Mud HD/VU $2.5
Mulan (2020) 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Mummy (1999) HD/VU $4
Mummy (2017) 4K/MA or IT $4.5
Muppets Most Wanted HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Murder on Orient Express HD/MA $3.5
My All American HD/MA or IT $3.5
My Fair Lady 4K/VU $5.5
Nebraska HD/VU $3
Nerve HD/IT $3.5
New Mutants HD/GP $3
News of World 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Night at Museum Secret of Tomb HD/MA $3
Nightmare Alley 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/GP $3.5
Nightmare Before Christmas HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
No Escape (2015) HD/VU $3
No Strings Attached HD/VU or IT $3.5
No Time to Die 4K/IT $4.5
Noah HD/VU or IT $2.5
Nobody's Fool HD/IT $2.5
Non-Stop HD/VU or IT $3
Norm of North HD/VU $2.5
Nostalgia (2018) HD/MA $3.5
Now You See Me 2 HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Now You See Me HD/VU or IT $2.5 or SD/VU $1
Nutcracker & Four Realms HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Oblivion 4K/MA or IT $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Occupation (2018) HD/VU $3.5
Occupation Rainfall HD/VU $4
Office Christmas Party HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Olaf's Frozen Adventure HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
One Direction This is Us SD/MA $1.5
Ong Bak 2 HD/VU $3
Onward 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
Other Woman HD/MA $3
Ouija HD/IT $3.5
Ouija Origin of Evil HD/VU or IT $3.5
Outlander Season 1 Vol 1 HD/VU $5.5
Overdrive HD/IT $2.5
Overlord 4K/IT $3.5
Oz Great & Powerful HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Paddington HD/VU $3.5
Pain & Gain HD/VU or IT $3.5
Paranormal Activity 3 (Ext) HD/VU or IT $3
Paranormal Activity 4 (Unr) HD/VU or IT $2.5
Paranormal Activity HD/VU $4
Paranormal Activity Marked Ones HD/VU or IT $3.5
Passengers HD/MA $3
Patriot Games 4K/VU $5
Patriot's Day HD/VU $3
Peanuts Movie HD/MA $3
Penguins of Madagascar HD/MA $3.5
Perks of Being a Wallflower SD/VU or IT $1
Pet Sematary (2019) 4K/IT $3.5
Peter Pan (1953) HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Peter Rabbit HD/MA $3.5
Pete's Dragon (2016) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Philomena HD/VU $2.5
Pinocchio (1940) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Pirates of Caribbean Dead Men Tell No Tales 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/GP $2.5
Pitch Black (Unr) HD/MA or IT $4
Pitch Perfect 2 4K/MA $4 or HD/VU $2.5
Pitch Perfect HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Pixar Short Films Collection Vol. 3 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Planes HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Planes Fire & Rescue HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Playing with Fire HD/IT $2.5
Pocahontas 2 Journey to a New World HD/GP $3.5
Pocahontas HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Point Break (2015) 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Poison Rose 4K/VU $4.5
Pompeii HD/MA $3.5
Possession HD/VU or IT $2.5
Power Rangers (2017) 4K/VU or IT $4.5
Precious HD/VU $4.5
Predator (2018) HD/MA $3
Predator 4-Film Collection HD/MA $11
Premium Rush HD/MA $3.5
Pride & Prejudice & Zombies HD/MA $3.5 or SD/MA $1.5
Primal HD/VU $3.5
Prodigy HD/VU $4
Project Almanac HD/IT $3.5
Protector 2 SD/VU $1.5
Protege HD/VU $4
Punisher 4K/VU $5.5
Punisher War Zone 4K/VU $5.5
Purge HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Purge Anarchy HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Purge Election Year 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Quarry 4K/VU $5
Queen & Slim HD/MA $4
Queen of Katwe HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Ralph Breaks Internet HD/GP $2
Rambo (2008) 4K/VU $5.5
Rambo 3 4K/VU $5.5
Rambo 5-Film Collection 4K/VU $23 or HD/VU $17
Rambo First Blood Pt 2 4K/VU $5.5
Rambo Last Blood 4K/VU $4.5
Rango HD/VU $3.5
Raya & Last Dragon HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Rear Window HD/MA $3.5
Reclaim HD/VU $3.5
RED 2 HD/VU $2
Red Dawn (2012) HD/VU or IT $3
Red Sparrow HD/MA $3.5
Replicant (2001) HD/VU $3.5
Replicas HD/VU $3.5
Requiem for a Dream (Dir Cut) 4K/VU $5.5
Resident Evil Retribution 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Resurrection of Gavin Stone HD/VU or IT $2.5
Revenant HD/MA $3.5
Riddick (Unr) HD/VU or IT $3
Ride Along HD/VU or IT $2.5
Ride Like a Girl HD/VU $4
Ring HD/VU $4.5
Rings HD/VU or IT $2.5
Rio 2 HD/MA $3
Riot HD/VU or IT $3
RIPD HD/IT $2.5
Risen HD/MA $3
Robin Hood (1973) HD/MA $3.5
Robin Hood (2018) HD/VU $3
Robocop (2014) HD/VU $2.5
Rocketman (2019) 4K/IT $4
Rogue One A Star Wars Story HD/GP $2
Ron's Gone Wrong HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Rough Night 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Runner Runner HD/MA $3.5
Rush HD/VU or IT $3
Safe HD/VU or IT $2.5
Saige Paints Sky HD/IT $3
Same Kind of Different As Me HD/IT or IT $3
Samson HD/MA $3.5
Santa Clause 2 HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Santa Clause 3 HD/MA $3
Santa Clause HD/MA $3.5
Santa Clause Trilogy HD/MA $9.5 or HD/GP $8
Saving Mr. Banks HD/GP $3
Saw 7-Film Collection (Unr) HD/VU $18
Saw 8-Film Collection HD/VU $20
Saw HD/VU $3
Scarface 4K/MA $5.5 or HD/MA $4
Scary Movie 5 HD/VU $4.5
Scary Stories to Tell in Dark 4K/VU $4.5
Schindler's List 4K/MA $5.5
Scouts Guide to Zombie Apocalypse HD/IT $3
Scream (1996) HD/VU $4
Scrooged HD/IT $4
Secret Life of Pets HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Secret Life of Walter Mitty HD/MA $3
Selma HD/VU or IT $2.5
Sex Tape HD/MA $3.5
Shack HD/VU or IT $2.5
Shallows HD/MA $3.5
Shang-Chi Legend of Ten Rings HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Shape of Water HD/MA $3.5
Sharp Objects HD/GP $2
Shaun of Dead HD/MA $4 or 4K/IT $4.5
Shaun Sheep Movie HD/VU $3
Sherlock Gnomes HD/VU or IT $2.5
She's Having a Baby HD/VU $3.5
Shivers HD/VU $4
Show Dogs HD/MA $3.5
Siberia (2018) HD/VU $3
Siberia (2020) HD/VU $4
Sicario HD/VU $2.5
Side Effects HD/IT $3.5
Sing (2016) 4K/IT $4
Singing in Rain 4K/MA $5.5
Sinister HD/IT $2.5
Sisters (Unr) HD/MA or IT $2.5
Sixteen Candles HD/MA $4
Skyfall HD/VU $2.5
Skyscraper HD/MA $3.5
Sleeping Beauty (1959) HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Sleepless HD/IT $2
Smokey & Bandit HD/MA $3.5
Smurfs Lost Village HD/MA $3.5
Snatched HD/MA $2
Snitch HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3 or SD/VU or IT $1
Snow White & Huntsman (Ext Edition) 4K/VU or IT $4.5 or HD/VU $3
Snow White & Seven Dwarfs (1937) HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Solo A Star Wars Story HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Some Kind of Wonderful HD/VU $3.5
Songbird 4K/IT $4.5
Sonic Hedgehog 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Soul HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Southpaw HD/VU $3
Southside With You HD/VU $4.5
Spider-Man 4-Cut Set (Spider-Man 2 w/ Thea & Ext) HD/MA $11.5
Spider-Man Far From Home HD/MA $3.5
Spider-Man Homecoming HD/MA $3
Spider-Man Homecoming/Far From Home Bundle HD/MA $6
Spies in Disguise 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
Spiral 4K/VU or IT $4.5
Split 4K/MA or IT $5
Split HD/MA $3.5
Spongebob Sponge out of Water HD/IT $2.5
Spy Who Dumped Me 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
St. Vincent HD/VU $3
Stand Up Guys HD/VU $3.5
Star SD/MA $1.5
Star Trek (2009) HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Star Trek 1-4 (Motion Picture, Wrath of Khan, Search for Spock, Voyage Home) 4K/VU $18
Star Trek Beyond HD/VU $3
Star Trek Into Darkness HD/VU $2.5
Star Wars Force Awakens HD/GP $1.5
Star Wars Last Jedi 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Star Wars Rise of Skywalker 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $3 or HD/GP $2.5
Step Up Revolution HD/IT $3
Sting 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5
Straight Outta Compton (Unr) HD/MA $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Strangers Prey at Night HD/MA $3
Suburbicon HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Sudden Death HD/IT $4
Suits Season 2 HD/IT $3.5
Sum of All Fears 4K/VU $5.5
Sundown Vampire in Retreat HD/VU $3.5
Super 8 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Super Buddies HD/GP $2
Sword in Stone HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Taxi Driver HD/MA $4
Ted (Unr) HD/IT $3
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014) HD/VU $2.5
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Out of Shadows HD/VU $3.5
Terminator 2 Judgment Day (Ext) HD/VU $4.5
Terminator 2 Judgment Day HD/VU $3.5
Terminator Dark Fate 4K/VU or IT $4 or HD/VU $2.5
Terminator Genisys HD/VU $2.5
Thanks for Sharing HD/VU $4
That Awkward Moment SD/MA $1.5
This is 40 HD/MA or IT $3.5
This is End HD/MA $3.5
Thor Dark World HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Thor HD/GP $3.5
Thor Ragnarok HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri HD/MA $3.5
To Kill a Mockingbird 4K/IT $4
Top Gun (1986) 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Total Recall (1990) HD/VU $3.5
Toy Story 4 4K/MA $4.5 or HD/MA $2.5 or HD/GP $2
Toy Story HD/GP $3.5
Toy Story of Terror HD/MA $4 or HD/GP $3.5
Transformers 4K/VU or IT $5
Transformers Last Knight HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Transformers Age of Extinction HD/VU $2.5 or 4K/IT $3
Tremors A Cold Day In Hell HD/MA $2.5
Triple 9 HD/IT $3.5
Trolls HD/MA $2.5
Trumbo HD/IT $3.5
Trust HD/VU $4
Turbo HD/MA or IT $3
Turning HD/MA $4
Twilight Breaking Dawn 2 HD/VU $1.5 or 4K/IT $2 or SD/VU $0.5
Twilight HD/VU $4
Twilight Breaking Dawn Pt 1 HD/VU $3.5 or 4K/IT $4
Tyler Perry's A Madea Christmas SD/VU $1.5
Tyler Perry's Madea's Witness Protection SD/VU $1
Tyler Perry's Temptation HD/GP $3
Unbreakable HD/GP $3.5
Unbroken HD/VU or IT $3
Uncle Drew HD/VU $3.5
Underworld Awakening HD/MA $3
Untouchables 4K/VU $5
Valerian & City of a Thousand Planets HD/VU $3.5
Vampire Academy HD/VU $4
Van Helsing HD/MA $3.5
Vanishing (2018) HD/VU $4
Veep Season 6 HD/IT $3.5
Venom HD/MA $3.5
Victoria & Abdul HD/MA $4
Vivarium HD/VU $4
Voices (2014) HD/VU $4
Vow SD/MA $1.5
Walk HD/MA $3.5
War for Planet of Apes HD/MA $3
Warcraft HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
Warm Bodies 4K/VU $4.5 or HD/VU $3 or SD/VU $1.5
Warrior 4K/VU $5 or HD/VU $3.5
Werewolf Beast Among Us (Unr) HD/IT $3.5
West Side Story 4K/MA $5 or HD/MA $3.5 or HD/GP $3
What Men Want HD/VU $3 or 4K/IT $3.5
When Game Stands Tall HD/MA $3 or SD/MA $1.5
Whisky Tango Foxtrot HD/IT $3
Why Him? HD/MA $3
Widows HD/MA $3.5
Wild Card HD/VU $3
Wild HD/MA $3.5
Wilson HD/MA $3.5
Winchester HD/VU $3.5
Wolf of Wall Street HD/VU or IT $3.5
Wolverine (Unr) (w/Thea) HD/MA $4
Wonder HD/VU $3
Wonder Park 4K/IT $2.5
Wonder Woman 1984 4K/MA $5.5
Woodlawn HD/MA or IT $3.5
World War Z HD/VU or IT $2.5
Wraith HD/VU $4
X-Men Apocalypse HD/MA $3
X-Men Days of Future Past HD/MA $3
X-Men First Class & Days of Future Past HD/MA $6.5
XXX Return of Xander Cage HD/VU $2 or 4K/IT $2.5
You Were Never Really Here HD/VU $4
You're Next HD/VU $3.5
Z for Zachariah HD/VU $4
Zero Dark Thirty HD/MA $3.5
Zeros & Ones HD/VU $4.5
Zootopia HD/GP $2.5

hese are concepts ideas I had for an Metal Gear (1987) remake which I would dub as Metal Gear Solid 6: Outer Haven. Metal Gear 2: Solid Snake (1990) would be called Metal Gear Solid 7: Zanzibarland. Both games would be long and give a lot of depth on Solid Snake's past and his relationship with Big Boss, Campbell and Gray Fox. Another game I would push for is Metal Gear Solid: The Philanthropy Chronicles.It would allow players to play as Solid Snake and his supporting cast after the events of Metal Gear Solid 2. Snake’s mission to continue taking out metal gears and track down the Patriots along with Revolver Ocelot. It would lead up to the events of Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots. I will be working on Metal Gear Solid 7: Zanzibarland concepts soon.
The concept for a Metal Gear Solid 6: Outer Haven (MGS6: OH):
I know its long as Metal Gear (1987) would have to be a game that is remade from the bottom up. A remake of Metal Gear 2: Solid Snake would be easier since it was a rock solid game. One wouldn't have to change much from it just expand on the story, elements and characterization it has already. I would love to get feed back from fans here.
Story:
The storytelling aspect is inspired by how MGS (1998) told its story. The game would start with Otacon, a ghost writer that wrote the novel of Snake’s exploits and those that work with Snake during Operation Intrude N313 telling the events of Metal Gear Solid 6: Outer Heaven to journalist they trust. We learn that Snake is paradon for his crimes and is buried as a war hero next to the grave of Big Boss. Given a Medal of Honor award and other awards from other countries for saving the world several times. The world is now knowing about his story and thus even more interested to learn of Snakes exploits during his youth. David Hayter voice being used as a recorded message from a dying Solid Snake giving accounts on what happened in Metal Gear Solid 6 and 7 along with most of his life. Snake hopes that his message and story will inspire others to be better and fight for what is right.
David Hayter wouldn’t voice a young Solid Snake as I feel a voice actor that is younger but can emulate David Hayter mannerism and his voice should do it. A young Solid Snake having a hint of innocence, nativity, vulnerability and self doubt at times.
David Hayter would voice Solid Snake in Metal Gear Solid 7: Zanzibarland since Snake is supposed to be older and wiser. David would be able to give us this voice range and kick it out of the park including the duel against the real Big Boss.
Plot:
The year is 1995, the Soviet Union has collapsed and the Cold War is now over. The threat of nuclear war is gone and the world embraces this newfound peace. However, this peace is short-lived as there are those that don’t want it. The world is engulfed with the threat of terrorism and rogue states that want to get their hands on nuclear weapons. The free world is now being threatened once again. The US Government works to combat this threat with its covert U.S. Army unit known as Fox-Hound under the leadership of the legendary war hero known as Big Boss. However, when a government agent goes missing during a mission…The agent last reports a weapon that can shake the foundations of the world known as “Metal Gear”. Big Boss sends in a rookie but talented Fox-Hound agent known as Solid Snake to learn of this new weapon. Will Snake learn the truth about this new weapon or will the world find out what Metal Gear will do if it's unleashed?
Mission:
Like MGS3 there would be a Virtuous Mission in MGS6:OH.

• Solid Snake is sent in by Big Boss to sneak into Mother Boss from MGS5 via Los Angeles Class (Block 3).
• Mother Base is set to be demolished by Outer Heaven forces as they move their forces and operations to mainland Galzburg, South Africa.
• Snake’s mission to find and rescue Gray Fox and any of the kidnapped scientists that work for Dr. Madnar. Find out what Metal Gear is and take them to the extraction point aka an Helicopter Pad not in use by Outer Haven units. Afterward, deploy the fulton recovery device for extraction
• Snake learns Gray Fox is being held in South Africa at the Outer Haven main base along with Dr. Madnar and his top scientist team. His low level assistants were to be executed by Outer Heaven soldiers via demolishing Mother Base. Last, that Metal Gear is also in South Africa and that Outer Haven is planning to use a custom made ICBM nuclear tipped missile potentially on any country that threatens them.
• The mission goes bad when Snake is about to have the scientist air lifted off the ground via fulton recovery devices. The scientists are brutally gunned down by Outer Haven Elite soldiers.
• An enraged Snake takes down the Outer Haven soldiers that approach him using his hybrid but deadly CQC system and tries to air lift himself via fulton recovery device. However, he is ambushed by a masked Venom Snake aka The Masked Phantasm.
• Snake puts up one hell of a fight, hitting Venom several times to where the point where Venom can only praise Snake’s skills. However, he loses when Venom plays mind games with him including stating his full code name and kicks up off the rig.
• Mother Base is destroyed by Venom and his men. Snake is adrift at sea until he is saved by the Los Angeles Class Submarine (Block 3) that helped him infiltrate Mother Base. He is later taken back to the states for a debriefing on what happened while he recovers in a hospital.
• In this mission, Snake only has Big Boss communicating with him and does not get much support. He is given only a trap gun, his CQC knife and basic first aid kits.
• The suit he wears is similar to his sneaking suit from MGS. Only this suit is design to swim on to the Mother Base elevator platform and sneak around on the surface at night

Main Mission:
This is where Snake goes to South Africa and has to get to Outer Haven which is a vastly HUGE heavily defended base. Potentially the best soldiers and mercenaries in the world work and defend the base. It is an official mission sponsored by Fox-Hound, NATO, CIA, NSA, UN and top members of the US Government. This means Solid Snake gets a load of equipment, gadgets and weapons for the mission.

• The briefing section for the main mission would give Escape from New York vibes. Big Boss, Lt. Colonel Roy Campell and other government officials brief Snake on his mission. It is here Snake sees his weapons, equipment and gadgets he will have for Operation:.
• Snake mission is the following: 1. Rescue Gray Fox, Kyle Schidener and Dr. Madnar. 2. Investigate War Crimes committed by Outer Haven. 3. Aid Resistance Fighters in any way possible. 4. Rescue any other hostages on the base. 5. Destroy Metal Gear and Neutralize the threat Outer Haven poses to the world. 6. Terminate the Masked Phantasm (Venom Snake)
• He is air dropped in South Africa by an C-130 gunship (Reference to Metal Gear NES/MGS3) and is ordered to meet with an Resistance fighter before moving into an areas destroyed by Outer Heaven forces via horse back
• This intro game would be similar to Rambo 3 and gives a hint on what Solid Snake will be going up against as travel though the beginning of the game seeing Outer Heaven air force units from a distance bomb villages
• The main mission would be a large map to roam around. The location being Galzburg, South Africa where the main base of Outer Haven is located at.
• When Gray Fox is rescued, he will provide support and be Snake’s mentor.
• Level boss battles will be intense and hard
• Last, Entering Outer Haven HQ will be intense and the final battle as well.

Gameplay would be a mix between MSG 3 and MSG 4 and MSG 5. It takes influence from other games like Red Dead Redemption, Splinter Cell and Grand Theft Auto video games along with new mechanics. The concept is to give the game a war survival horror like vibe if you’re spotted by the enemy or having trouble surviving in the wilderness.
MSG3 gameplay elements

• Like MGS3, you could change your camouflage and blend into the environment, camouflage meter, survive off the wilderness and eat foods.
• Finding food in the wilderness would boost Snake’s stamina and also assist with him getting his LIFE up when he rests. However, they would not boost his LIFE up like military rations or other foods (Three-Five star food) found in the supply depots or mess halls at Outer Haven bases would.
• The first aid system from MGS3 would play a part in the game. Solid Snake would be able to heal his wounds or stop bleeding like Big Boss did in MGS3 many decades ago. So having first aid items will be vital.
• The game would have different rations from different countries that Snake can eat from if he takes it off an Outer Haven soldier or from their supply depots. Military rations help heal Snake LIFE and give a small or moderate boost depending on the quality of the ration. (ex. American Military rations would give a moderate boost to Snake LIFE but would give a small boost to his stamina as he isn’t in favor of the rations taste. Russian rations would only give Snake a Small boost in LIFE and small boost in stamina due to its taste. Call back to MGS3. French Rations would boost Snake’s LIFE and Stamina completely which would be a call back to MSG4.)
• Different foods found on Outer Haven bases can boost Snake’s stamina up and LIFE better than Rations such as the Calorie Mate, Curry, different sodas, snacks, etc. Also, three or five star meals found in Outer Haven mess halls scatter through-out their many sub bases or garrisons. P.S. I want to have a scene where Solid Snake finds a Calorie Mate and speaks to Big Boss about it and the two have an interesting conversation about it. (Lol)
• Snake can sabotage enemy supply deports and armories to reduce the enemies ability in fighting him if spotted.

MGS4 Gameplay elements-

• Over the shoulder gameplay
• First person view and aiming down the sights
• A fluid polished gun gameplay mechanic
• Customizable weapon system, weapon attachment, swapping out and fixing inventory slot for weapons and/or inventory
• Psyche meter, this goes down when Snake is spotted too much and takes too much damage
• Currency system to upgrade weapons and get ammo when Snake runs into Resistance fighters weapon vendors
• Solid Snake having the option to assist resistance fighters or continue with his mission
• Aiding resistance fighters will help Snake during take segments of the game. They will return favors to Snake by giving him rations, weapons, other foods and ammo
• Saving hostages at Outer Haven facilities will also assist Snake and give him items or information
• Polished CQC system
• Being able to pick up ammo and weapons of dead enemy soldiers. No ID tags for the weapon.

MGS 5-

• Polished CQC and fighting system
• Being able to operate vehicles, tanks, apcs and infantry fighting vehicles. However, enemy forces will start to respond more aggressive call in armored units or gunships to Snake out
• Ride horses
• Weather and day changes at random times, Snake can use this for his advantage
• Enemy checkpoints and small bases that Outer Haven use as buffer against intruders and Outer Haven resistance fighters
• Call in support from local Outer Heaven Resistance fighters (only if you assisted them in them battles, gained their respect and they’re nearby to help)
• Gunship helicopter patrols
• Air assault units
• Armored convoy patrol
• Snake can sabotage mini Outer Haven bases, outpost and can knock enemy communications which makes it harder for enemies to call for back up
• Sabotaging Outer Heaven outposts and their infrastructure will cause Outer Heaven to move their forces out to confront the Resistance fighters thus giving Solid Snake a chance to get past them
• Snake can smoke his Lucky Striker cigarettes to bring up his Psyche or allow time to pass by similar to what Venom Snake did with his E-Cigars in MSG5

Splinter cell element-

• The game would allow players/Solid Snake to use stealth mechanics similar to that game to get by or attack Outer Heaven soldiers
• This also means hiding in the shadows and sometimes staying out of the light

Grand Theft Auto elements-

• Like GTA games, if you do too much damage to the police they get more aggressive.
• It would be no different when you fight Outer Haven soldiers as they will start to send in more elite soldiers with better weapons and armor.
• They will also be able to be armored units or mechanized units and gunships would be sent to kill Snake.
• Worse, Air strikes and heavy artillery strikes as well. Some OH units would deploy bi-pedal armor vehicles and jet packs along with guard dogs.
• This would strongly support the stealth element of the game and give it a war horror movie vibe if you get spotted by the enemy. It doesn’t matter how many good weapons you have on you. You will be overwhelmed by Outer Heaven soldiers and will die if you get spotted multiple times.
• This would be similar to what you see in GTA if too many law enforcement agents continue to swarm on you

New Gaming mechanics -

• Non-linear gameplay- meaning random patrols of Outer Soldiers can occur the closer you get to Outer Haven HQ
• Open world map. Goal is to give fans the immersion that the red dead redemption games gave. Basically the Outer Heaven is like a large country in and of itself
• Game would reward you for not being spotted and embracing the stealth elements of the game. This means you will encounter less Outer Heaven patrols in the game and they won’t be heavily geared up when doing them
• If Snake gets spotted too much in the game, Outer Heaven soldiers will be more hype vigilante, heavily armed and geared up. They will change their patrol tactics to make it difficult for Snake to sneak around. Worse double up on patrols or have support from armored units, gunships or unmanned drones.
• Stealth take down system. Snake can perform lethal or non-lethal takedowns rambo style when his enemies get close. The players can make the decision on which take down to use.
• Snake can switch his fighting system from CQC to the various martial arts he knows. If multiple soldiers are near him he can use CQC or use standard martial arts when fighting enemies that can counter his CQC based attacks.
• He can use a CQC take down on enemies not paying attention to him or other forms of melee takedowns.
• This is to showcase how skilled Snake is when it comes to fighting
• Different locations have points that are controlled by the Outer Haven Resistance fighters and Outer Heaven soldiers
• The game will reward players for assisting Outer Heaven resistances and sabotaging Outer Heaven bases
• Liberate occupied villages under Outer Heaven soldiers occupation or avoid them, go though abandoned villages or resistance fighter controlled villages
• The closer you get to Outer Haven, the more patrols and mini bases run by Outer Heaven soldiers you will encounter. This means the game will get very difficult real quick.
• Outer Heaven patrols will be random at time depending on how many times you have raised the alarms or not during your mission
• Caution mode would contribute to this but there will be more patrols if you cause yourself to enter caution phase too much
• The travel to Outer Haven’s main HQ is to parallel MSG3 when Big Boss had to travel to Gronznyj Grad. It short, Snake travels to Outer Haven would be an epic long high adrenaline rush journey to defeat Venom Snake and destroy TX-55 Metal Gear
• South Africa’s map would be vast and large. It is filled with its soft and rough terrain. Snake can use this to his advantage but so can Outer Heaven Soldiers
• Players will have the option to either go to Outer Heaven outpost or avoid them by using the rough terrain to get around the outpost
• Gray Fox will assist Snake in certain parts of the game and provide support either though radio or combat support to take down a level boss.
• At times, Snake and Gray Fox would work together to take down Outer Haven patrols
• The final part of the game involves Solid Snake and Gray Fox having to fight hordes of Elite Outer Heaven soldiers as they fight to stop Venom Snake from using TX-55 to fire a completed experimental long range ICBM nuclear missile on the Patriots
• Last, Solid Snake vs Venom Snake. Venom proclaims that he is Big Boss to Snake after taking off his mask and the two fight. The rest is history.
• The final battle is to parallel the battle between The Boss and Big Boss. Intense gunfight and CQC fight between the two. Snake needs to use an experimental rocket launcher made by Outer Haven to kill Venom Snake
• After beating the game, you can play as Gray Fox and see the story though his eyes and how he is informed by the Real Big Boss to assist Snake and help him take down Venom Snake.
• Being able to blend into the environment Rambo/Navy SEAL tier One style to either get past enemies or take them down one by one
• Snake would have a booby trap system inspire the Rambo movies to help ambush soldiers or distract them while they go to aid wounded soldiers.
• Snake can create ghillie suits to hide from enemy soldiers, covertly sneak past them or use it to ambush them
• Players would have multiple options on how to enter Outer Heaven outpost and the main HQ

Weapons

• The weapons in the game will be from late 60s to mid 90s. Weapons form both Soviet Union, Warsaw Pact, China and NATO countries. This goes from handgun, submachines, assault rifles, shotguns, sniper rifles, and anti tank weapons. Last, grenades and mines.
• Weapons can be customizable for Snake to use if he finds the attachment for the weapons or finds an resistance fighter vendor that is nearby to upgrade his weapons
• Enemies use weapons fitted for the environment that they operate it and it's at random the types they use
• Some weapons will be custom built weapons that don’t exist in the real world to be the spirit of the previous Metal Gear Solid game.
• Some weapons will allow Snake to use his CQC techniques or basic melee attacks with weapons

Snake’s Gadgets/Tools for the main mission where he gets official support

• Snake's suit is a combination of late 80s and 90s US Army Special Forces attire but modified.
• 90s tactical vest. It can be upgraded for Snake to carry more ammo and to take more damage as time goes on
• Custom built MP5SD6 with a folding stock, an Beretta 92FS with an tactical flashlight/laser sighting, also can be fitted with an suppressor and MK.22 Trap gun. The weapons are modded so he can use his CQC skills
• A small pack that allows Snake to carry items. This can be increased by upgrading it in the game
• Motion-sensing radar that allows him to track enemy soldiers, a precursor to Soliton Radar. It acts more like a sonar device then radar
• Mountain climbing equipment
• Combat Scuba gear (can be refilled by going outer heaven supply deports)
• Snake has a advanced long range radio and a wireless headset to communicate with his team
• Wire cutters
• Different camouflages and face paint to wear
• Idroid like device but advanced
• Fox Hound adaptation of INT-SCOPE but more advanced and has the ability for Snake to switch to different fields of view including Night Vision and Thermal Infrared. Last, a camera system for Snake to take pictures
• INT-SCOPE can be used to help Snake what tier Outer Heaven Soldier that he is dealing with and help him plan acquiring and allow him to listen in
• Tactical flashlights
• Tools to create ghillie suits
• CQC knife
• Survival Knife used for melee take downs
• Limited Fox-Hound issued MRE rations to restore life and stamina along with restore psyche
• A blue bandana that Big Boss gives him

Vehicles

• Vehicles found in the game are jeeps, armored tank, tanks, APCs, artillery vehicles and helicopters along with jets from the late 70s to mid 90s
• Unmanned vehicles that didn’t exist in the mid 90s

Theme:

• The end of the 80s going into a new era aka the 90s.
• Desert Storm and the aftermath of the war
• The politics behind America being the only SuperpoweHype-power in the 90s
• Child Soldiers, Solid Snake being one.
• NATO, its organization expanding and the conflicts it was involved in though peacekeeping missions
• The fall of the Soviet Union, end of the Cold War, and Post-Cold War politics/events
• The rise of new technology, internet, movies, music CGI and upcoming digital age in the 90s
• The rise of global terrorism and rogue states
• The threat terrorism and rogue states pose and the fear of them getting their hands on nuclear weapons. A true big fear of the 90s going into the 2000s
• Coming of age soldiesecret agent/legend (Solid Snake)

Movie Influence:

• The Rambo movie series since Metal Gear and Metal Gear 2: Solid Snake were heavily influenced by the first three Rambo movies.
• 80s and 90s James Bond movies. Mostly Goldeneye since it follows post-cold war.
• Die Hard movies series, gun battles and intensity between the characters and death defining odds
• Hardboiled (1992), the gun battle that Solid Snake and Gray Fox will have against the swarm of Outer Haven elite soldiers would be heavily influenced off the final gun battle from this movie.
• Running Man, the Boss level villains being similar in design to the villains from the movie, only less colorful, evil like, aggressive and more tactical in fighting.
• Face Off (1997) - action scenes
• Escape from New York, since the first game was influenced by the movie. The main mission where Solid Snake goes to South Africa with official support will give off this type of vibes including the mission briefing he is given as he looks at his equipment.
• The Rock (1996), action scenes and the relationship that Sean Connery as John Patrick Mason and Nicolas Cage as Stanley Goodspeed, FBI. Its similar to the relationship Gray Fox and Solid Snake will have.

Game Music:

• The music for the game would be influenced by the previous MGS games, Rambo movies, Syphon filter and action movies from the 90s. Mixed bag of tones to give different vibes for the game
• The music will be atmospheric in nature as you move around Mother Base and later South Africa
• One set of music to make you feel like a spy, other half giving you the false sense of safety, other places the music will make you feel like your in a warzone and/or being chased
• Real world music from the 80s and 90s that players can listen to when they find a Sony Discman D-145 (1995) laying around or Sony walkmans
• Real world music would 80s - 1995, Rock, Pop, Alternative Rock, R&B, Mainstream hits, Rap, Jaxx and etc. Can listen to game music as well on either device when you the player find them.

Characters:

• David/Solid Snake:
• A child soldier of sorts. He spent his life being fostered by different foster parents (Patriot handlers) until he reached the age of 6. After that, Solid Snake was trained though-out most of his life by his many handlers at an US Army run school.
• In the US Army run school (Patriots involvement), he was made to engage in a mix of U.S. infantry, Airborne infantry, U.S. Army Ranger, Green Beret and Delta Force style harsh training. Add in the school making him learn different languages at a young age.
• On days he didn’t do military training, Snake was made to endure intense academic schooling. It was here Snake was pushed to understand the general knowledge of Science, Math, Reading, English, Writing, Workshop Skills at a High School to College level. In addition, understand how to operate most vehicles as well.
• At age 18, he was later placed in the US Army as a 2LT to a Green Beret Unit. The Patriots and his handlers, changed his age date so that he was capable of joining the unit and being a junior officer. He is second in command of the unit and sent to fight in Desert Storm (1990-1991).
• Solid Snake had a short but very successful career in the US Army through the multiple successful missions he completed in that war.
• His missions involved him destroying multiple SCUD launchers, sabotaging Iraqi supply lines, disputing their communication lines, assassination or capturing of top Iraqi officers, and deep reconnaissance within Iraq. His unit would also take part in aiding in liberating Kuwait.
• He is awarded a Silver Star and promotion to Captain before personally being recruited into Fox-Hound by Big Boss himself.
• Big Boss and Roy Campell were coordinating Fox-Hound operations in Desert Storm which is why they knew of Snake’s exploits and saw him as a candidate for the unit.
• Prime Solid Snake is a force to reckon with and is considered to be the best all around Fox-Hound agent along with being the finest practitioner of CQC next to Big Boss and The Boss.
• Big Boss states to Gray Fox at the end of the game that Snake could defeat The Boss with ease had they had fought in a straight hand to hand duel in the 1960s. In short, this is Big Boss way of humbling Gray Fox and telling him to NOT underestimate Snake for when the time comes for Fox to kill him (Metal Gear 2: Solid Snake events).
• Snake’s CQC is unique and deadly in design due to his expert knowledge of various different martial arts from his youth, his mastery of Close Quarter Battle (CQB) and knowledge of CQC handed down to him by Big Boss. Snake incorporates many different forms of Martial Arts to his style of CQC where he adds in striking (punching and kicking), fake or faints, foot work, clinch, ground fighting and grappling.
• Despite being inexperienced, Snake makes up for this by being sure of his skills and not being afraid to pull the trigger. Snake’s real fear is that he is going up against experienced killers and soldiers by himself who can kill him
• Snake’s relationship with Gray Fox is similar to the relationship to what we saw in MGS2 between Solid Snake and Raiden. Only a young Solid Snake is more badass when compared to a young Raiden
• Snake’s relationship to Roy Campell is similar to what we see in MGS. However, the two become friends quickly due to the experiences they share being involved in Desert Storm.
• Roy Campell encourages Snake not to give up and to be sure of himself. He also calms down an enraged Snake when they learn that Big Boss is behind everything.
• Solid Snake's relationship with Big Boss is similar to The Boss and Naked Snake in MGS3 but a lot longer as Big Boss continues to “support” Solid Snake with his mission.
• Fox-Hound, NATO, CIA, FBI and NSA start to put the pieces together that Big Boss is behind everything. He goes off the air and Venom Snake confronts Solid Snake. Rest is history after that.
  Big Boss:
  
• He is the commander of Fox-Hound and re-organizes the covert special forces unit to combat terrorism and rogue states trying to get their hands on nuclear weapons.
  
• This was a fear in the 90s and Big Boss being a legendary war hero made him the perfect pick to be the leaders of the organization again
  
• Under his leadership, Fox-Hound is successful in taking out world terrorists, international arms dealers, their backs and having them arrest by allied countries
  
• Big Boss and Roy Campell are awarded medals for their efforts
  
• Big Boss holds the simulated rank of a One Star General in within Fox-Hound due to his vast war experience, successful missions and saving the world several times over
  
• We learn of Big Boss past and how he was an top NCO before MGS3 before being given an rank of officer
  
• Big Boss personally trains Solid Snake and passes his legacy down to him after Snake accepts an open challenge to spare him and hits Big Boss multiple times before losing.
  
• This is a tradition Big Boss would offer recruits during his command. The challenge was that he would train any recruit as his solo student if they could hit him in sparring. Only Snake was the only recruit to do so in Fox-Hound.
  
• Big Boss does care for Solid Snake in a bizarre way and doesn’t want to see him killed unless it's by his hands which he is secretly plotting to do.
  
• In the virtuous and main mission, Big Boss provides support to Solid Snake by giving him advice from his war time experience, how to survive in sneaking around Outer Haven and how to survive off the land.
  
• During Boss battles, Big Boss goes off the air, leaving Campell to assist.
  
• Everyone becomes suspicious of Big Boss when they discover his spy plane has disappeared off radar and it is not far from Outer Haven.
  
• Worse, when intelligence agencies learn that Big Boss was sending message to Outer Heaven HQ (Gray Fox) but they are unaware of who
  
• They create an warrant for his arrest and the rest is history after Venom Snake dies
  Roy Campbell :
  
• He isn’t a full bird colonel yet and is an Lt. Colonel. He is second in command of Fox-Hound.
  
• Big Boss trusted Campell because of the events they shared in MSG:PO and the vast amount of experience he has in counter-terrorism missions to black ops in taking out terrorists leaders.
  
• Campbell quickly befriends Solid Snake due to their shared war experiences in Desert Storm.
  
• Campbell is a skilled tactician and strategist, and is heavily supportive of Solid Snake. He gives Snake (Player) hints and clues to move around in the game. In addition, information on weapons and vehicles.
  
• Last, he gives ideas on how to destroy level bosses
  Gray Fox:
  
• He was on a mission to assassinate Venom Snake after Big Boss discovered that Venom wants to use Nuclear Weapons against Patriot run countries that would trigger a nuclear war. Of course, official members of Fox-Hound are unaware of this and believe he is investigating Outer Haven to learn if they’re involved with terrorists.
  
• He fails his mission that Big Boss assigned to him and is captured by Venom Snake after losing a fight against him.
  
• Venom spares his life and threatens that if he escape, he will personally take him out next time.
  
• After being feed by Solid Snake, Gray Fox is ordered by Big Boss in secret to assist Snake in taking out Venom and later assassinate Snake to cover up everything at Outer Heaven.
  
• However, Gray Fox is unable to help Snake take out Venom after being cut off by a swarm of Outer Haven soldiers. He instead sacrifices himself so that Snake can stop Venom from launching nukes from Metal Gear TX-55. Later, fakes his death so he could return to the real Big Boss and help with Zainabarland
  
• After beating the game, you can play as Gray Fox and see the story through his eyes. Learn more about him, his fighting style and how he assists Solid Snake
  
• His fighting is mixed between his fighting style as Null (MGS:PO), CQC concepts Big Boss passed to him, Knife fighting style and pro gun fighting skills.
  

Venom Snake/Big Boss:

• Venom Snake would have a huge makeover since the events of Metal Gear Solid 5. He has been given nanomachines so that he can survive future medical surgery and look more like Big Boss and stand in for him.
• The horn in his head is removed which almost kills him but the nanomachines prevent this and heal him. They also grant him superhuman abilities that turn him into a super-soldier of sorts. His bionic hand is replaced with a more human-like bionic hand.
• The nanomachines are a precursor to what Vamp would have many years later. Only Venom’s nanos won’t bring him back from the dead, just heal him faster. However, the side effects is that the nanos in him are making him mentally unhinged
• He is given a new sneaking suit to help harness his new abilities and provide extra protection for him. Snake would need to use an Anti-Tank rifle or Anti-Tank rocket launcher to take him out.
• He is not the same man he was in MSG5. He is more militant towards the Patriots, ruthless and cold blooded. A pure demon at this point and isn’t afraid to commit war crimes or allow his men to do so.
• Venom’s prime mission is to destroy the Patriots and nations they run via nuclear strike using TX-55 Metal Gear. However, he knows that Outer Haven will be hit by NATO countries.
• This causes a rift between Venom and Big Boss. Venom sees Big Boss as being weak and is not willing to do enough to destroy the Patriots and is not willing to do whatever it takes to do so.
• However, the rift is created by Master Miller who kept his promise to help make the sons of Big Boss and Venom Snake stronger then Big Boss
• The rift gets so bad that Big Boss suspects Venom is not being loyal to him anymore and sends in Gray Fox to find out what Venom is doing leading to Metal Gear (1987) events and to assassinate him. Fox fails and loses to Venom in a fight. Venom shows mercy and has Fox locked at a maximum security brig at the Outer Haven prison site.
• A Venom Snake respects Solid Snake as he sees how skilled he is but he also plays mind games with him by hinting his relationship to Big Boss.
• He now wears a mask when he goes out in battlefields to fight aside his men so as to keep Big Boss identity hidden. He is dubbed the Masked Phantasm by world intelligence agencies. As far as the world is concerned, nobody knows who the Masked Phantasm is. Some people think he is a student of Big Boss due to CQC abilities. Near the end, he takes the mask off to reveal to Solid Snake who he is Big Boss (fake one).
• Last, we will know of the tragic story of Venom Snake and how really wanted to be a doctor after his contract with Militaires Sans Frontières end.
• Sadly, no one will ever know about Venom Snake and the man he was before his tragic events.
• He will apologize via radio to Big Boss asking his forgiveness and informs him that Solid Snake is not a man but a demon of their own making. Last, he correctly predicts that Snake will defeat the Patriots and do what they failed to do right before the Outer Haven based self destructs.

Supporting Characters
Kyle Schneider

• Developer of Outer Haven and help with building the base. Later, becomes the leader of the Outer Haven resistance force in South Africa after learning of Outer Haven’s war crimes in the region.
• He is captured and the resistance fighters try to scramble to rescue him. They agree to help Fox-Hound and Solid Snake in exchange for the safe return of their leader
• Knows where most of the weapons, foods and other important items are on the base will inform Snake on where to find them.
• Also inform Snake of where vital security checkpoints are and more are located at.
• Is caught in the explosion when NATO destroys what is left of Outer Haven. He is saved by the Real Big Boss.
• He will tragically become the Black Ninja and this leads to the event of Metal Gear 2: Solid Snake where he will seek revenge against the world for what has happened to him.

Jennifer Schneider

• She is the sister of Kyle Scheider. She took it upon herself to go and rescue her brother despite not being a soldier or warrior.
• She disguises herself as a nurse and sneaks into the base. She assist Snakes with information and where weapons are at.
• The original game doesn't say what happened to her. So I have her help Solid Snake escape and they watch Outer Haven from a distance get destroyed with NATO delivering air strikes on reminding Outer Haven bases
• She is present when Solid Snake is giving a medal for completing the mission by President Bill Clinton
• The two have a brief relationship before he moves to Canada to be an undercover CIA agent
• Snake helps her find a job in America for her helping him and getting her a green card to stay in America

Diane

• A Goth Punk rocker that has a band called Thin Wall. She performed for Outer Haven several times and knows about the base
• She assists Snake with giving information on Outer Haven bases and the main HQ. Also, info on the mercenaries that operate the bases and informs him of the weakness of the Bosses in the game.
• She has a crush on Solid Snake and is in her early 20s.
• She is present for Solid Snake getting a medal for completing the mission

Drago Pettrovich Madnar

• The developer of the first Metal Gear. His project, himself, his scientist and his daughter are taken hostage by Outer Heaven soldiers
• He is being used to complete TX-55 Metal Gear and develop an custom built nuclear tipped ICBM that can be fired from Metal Gear
• Informs Solid Snake on how to take out Metal Gear He is taken off base by Jennifer after Snakes saves him
• He informs the US Government to send Snake his regards fos saving him

Ellen Madnar

• The daughter of Dr. Madnar. She is being used as a tool to force Dr. Madnar on continuing his work on TX-55 Metal Gear
• She is saved by Snake and escorted off the base by Jennifer
• She is present for Snake getting a medal for completing the mission and stands in for her father

Tech (Original)

• Expert in science, engineering and responsible for making all of the gadgets Fox-Hound has
• He is also aware of the weapon systems, gadgets and tools that Outer Heaven Soldiers use
• Son of Donald Anderson
• Gameplay mechanic, he is charge of saving the game for you when you contact him
• Would return in Metal Gear Solid 7: Zanzibar Land and Metal Gear Solid: Philanthropy Chronicles to aid Snake. In Philanthropy Chronicles he aids Snake to atone for the sins of his father. He would go into hiring with Snake’s afterwards which is why there is no mention of him in MGS4
• He would leave Fox-Hound after the Zanzibarland incident and work for the CIA as a gadget builder

Hi everyone,
Shipping from California to US only. Did my best to price appropriately, but if something seems off, let's talk.
$5 unlimited shipping. $20 minimum to ship. Paypal Goods and Services only.
Grading is record/sleeve.
If interested, please comment and then send a message/chat. Would LOVE to trade. Trade list of wants is at the bottom.
Thanks for looking!
Art Pepper - Early Art VG+/VG+ - $15
Sleeve has corner cut on spine side and is a little dirt/ringwear on bottom and top which is a bit more visible with it being an off white color jacket. Most of the record plays quite well but there are a couple tics at the beginning of the second track on the fourth side. Happy to send pics.
Atmosphere - Seven's Travels NM/NM - $20 Played once.
Bob Marley - 20 Greatest Hits VG+/VG+ - $10
Byron Janis - Piano Concertos VG+/VG+ - $15
Derek and the Dominos - Layla and Other Assorted Love Songs VG+/STRONG VG $15
(Creasing to bottom of cover near spine. Initials in blue marker on bottom right of cover.)
Horace Silver - Song For My Father VG+/VG+ - $25 (With Obi)
Jack McDuff - Magnetic Feel VG+/VG+ - $15
Junior Mance Trio - That's Where It Is VG+/NM - $10 in shrink.
Kim So Hee - Pansori Korea's Epic Vocal Art Instrumental Music VG+/VG - $20 (name on label in pen)
Les Baxter and his Orchestra - The Primitive and the Passionate VG+/VG+ - $10
Lonnie Smith - Keep On Lovin' VG+/VG - $15 Sleeve has some significant creasing near top, most prominent on back, happy to send pics.
Me First and the Gimme Gimmes - Take a Break NM/NM - $20 Played once, in shrink.
Miles Davis - Quiet Nights VG+/VG+ - $15 in shrink.
Not 100% sure this is the right Discogs listing, Runouts end with 1k on A side and 1AF on B side.
Muscle Shoals Horns - Doin' It To The Bone VG+/VG - $12
Nilsson - Nilsson Schmilsson STRONG VG/VG - $10
plays clean except some noise for first 45 seconds or so of Without You which is kind of annoying. Sleeve in pretty good shape but big ol Promo timing strip deal across bottom half of cover
Oscar Peterson Trio - Night Train VG+/NM - $30 (RE6 on A RE3 on B with scratch outs) Borderline NM all around
Paul Desmond - Easy Living NM/NM $40 (In shrink, beautiful)
Ramones - Subterranean Jungle VG+/VG+ $25
(name written on labels, small price sticker on top right front of jacket.)
Ramones - Too Tough To Die VG+/VG+ - $30
(Name on label in pen, creasing and a little bit of sticker residue on cover.)
Rusty Bryant - Fire Eater NM/NM - $25
Sam Coffey and the Iron Lungs - Sam Coffey and the Iron Lungs - NM/NM - $10
Stan Getz/Joao Gilberto - Getz/Gilberto - VG+/NM - $35 in shrink.
Stan Getz / Charlie Byrd - Jazz Samba STRONG VG/STRONG VG - $10
Various - A Motown Christmas VG+/VG+ - $30
Various - Funky Stuff: The Best of Funk Essentials Volume One VG+/STRONG VG - $12 (creasing on bottom right corner of sleeve)
Vince Guarald - Oh, Good Grief! VG+/NM - $25 (borderline NM on media, in shrink.)
ALL BELOW $3 EACH:
Aerosmith - Live! Bootleg
Bob James - Heads
Bread - The Best of Bread
Bread - The Best of Bread Volume Two
Bud Shank - Bud Shank and the Sax Section
Charlie Byrd - The Great Byrd
Charlie Byrd - Hollywood Byrd
Charlie Byrd - Sketches of Brazil
Cliff Richard - Best 20
Colin James Hay - Looking For Jack
The Crusaders - Unsung Heroes
Elton John - 17-11-70
Elton John - Blue Moves
Elton John - Rock of the Westies
Enoch Light and the Brass Menagerie - The Brass Menagerie 1973
Greg Kihn - Again
Jim Croce - You Don't Mess Around with Jim
Johnny Hodges - The Eleventh Hour
Judy Collins - Recollections
Kenny G - Duotones
Les Baxter His Orchestra And Chorus - Voices In Rhythm
Loverboy - Get Lucky
Mark Colby - Serpentine Fire
Michael Stanley Band - Heartland
Mike Rutherford - Smallcreep's Day
Mystic Moods Orchestra - One Stormy Night
Pete Seeger - We Shall Overcome
Rick Springfield - Tao
Rick Springfield - Beautiful Feelings
Rick Wakeman - Journey to the Centre of the Earth
The Rubinoos - Back to the drawing board
The Rubinoos - Party of Two
Tropea - Tropea VG+/VG+
Vangelis - Opera Sauvage
Vic Feldman - Mallets A Fore Thought G+/G
Windham Hill Records Sampler '82
Wings - London Town
LOOKING TO TRADE FOR AND/OR BUY THESE:
Charles Kynard - Woga
Donald Byrd - Kofi
Funk Inc. - Chicken Lickin'
Grateful Dead - Wake of the Flood
Harold Ousley - The Kid!
Horace Silver Quintet - Cape Verdean Blues
Ike Quebec - Bossa Nova Soul Samba
Keith Jarrett - The Survivor's Suite
Melvin Sparks - Akilah!
Neal Creque - Contrast!
O'Donel Levy - Simba
Pucho & His Latin Soul Brothers - Jungle Fire!
Teddy Edwards - Nothin' But The Truth!
Wavves - V
Yusef Lateef - Detroit
Primarily looking for Jazz/Funk type stuff, so if you have something along those lines let me know!

NOTE: This is a remake of the list I made way back in 2022, and it can be found here: https://www.reddit.com/BokuNoHeroAcademia/comments/vx4z7h/providing_some_characters_ideal_real_names_in_my/
Keep in mind that some entries on the list have their names changed over time because of, well, reasons. Check the old list for comparison.
​
Providing some characters’ ideal real names in My Hero Academia whose real names are currently unknown and are only referred by their aliases.
Have you ever wondered what the real names of some characters in My Hero Academia may be? There are some who are only refered by their aliases and not their real names. For example, we know that Cementoss’ real name is Ken Ishiyama (石山堅), but Ectoplasm’s real name is unknown. So I thought I would compile a list of characters, whether heroes, villains, or neutral, whose real names are not revealed in any form of media, whether they are anime, manga, game, or light novels. Keep in mind that I made up all of the ideal real names by myself (with my limited knowledge of the Japanese language). We’ll wait if Kohei Horikoshi decided on some of the names to be designated as official real names, so there could be a possibility that if a real name is already revealed and is different from mine.
Crimson Riot: Masayoshi Shinkuyama (真紅山正義, しんくやま まさよし)
Shin (真) means true, Ku (紅) means crimson or deep red, Yama (山) means mountain, Masa (正) means correct or justice, and Yoshi (義) means righteousness. The surname Shinkuyama means deep crimson mountain, which explains his hero name. The given name Masayoshi means justice, since Masayoshi is an alternate reading of Seigi, which also means justice. His sense of justice, and to an extent, chivalry, is what motivated the life of Eijiro Kirishima on his path of training to be a pro hero.
Lunch Rush: Godan Ransei (蘭生五旦, らんせい ごだん)
Ran (蘭) means orchid, Sei (生) means raw or genuine, Go (五) means 5, and Dan (旦) means daybreak. His name is a play on British chef celebrity Gordon Ramsay, only if you mention the name in western order, since Japanese names use the surname-first, given-name order, making his name Ransei Godan instead. The Go in Godan likely refers to the 5 tastes – sweet, sour, salty, bitter, and umami, while Dan refers to breakfast, which is ironic considering that his hero name is Lunch Rush. The Sei in Ransei also likely refers to his signature insult.
Snipe: Hokori Toki (東木埃, とうき ほこり)
To or Higashi or Azuma (東) means east, Ki (木) means tree or wood, and Hokori (埃) means dust. The surname Toki roughly means “east wood”, a reference to American actor Clint Eastwood, who is known for starring in old west and spaghetti western films. The surname is also homophonous with time in Japanese, Toki (時), probably as in the phrase “the good old times” or “the good old days”. The given name might be a reference to the “Dust Bowl”, the name given to the drought-stricken Southern Plains region of the United States in the 1930’s, or the Kansas song Dust in the Wind.
Ectoplasm: Kazuhiro Masumi (増見数博, ますみ かずひろ)
Masu (増) means multiply or increase, Mi (見) means to see, Kazu (数) means number, and Hiro (博) means command or esteem or win acclaim. The surname Masumi alludes to his quirk, noting that he can multiply or clone his own self, while seeing multiple directions at once through his clones. The given name Kazuhiro is a reference to his profession, a math teacher in UA.
Backdraft: Kansho Kadome (火止看消, かどめ かんしょう)
Ka or Hi (火) means fire, Dome or Tome (止) means to stop or halt, Kan (看) means to watch or observe, and Sho (消) means to erase or extinguish, the same kanji character in Shota Aizawa’s name (相澤消太). In other words, Kadome means stopping fire, while Kansho means observe while extinguishing.
Uwabami: Mamiko Hebita (蛇田真美子, へびた まみこ)
Hebi (蛇) means snake, Ta or Da (田) means rice field, Ma or Shin (真) means true, Mi or Bi (美) means beauty, and Ko (子) means child. Hebi in Hebita refers to her appearance and quirk, alluding to the Greek mythological figure Medusa. Her given name means true beautiful child.
Gunhead: Kenshiro Tsutsuto (銃頭拳志郎, つつとう けんしろう)
Tsutsu (銃) means gun, To or Atama (頭) means head, Ken (拳) means fist, Shi (志) means will or intention, and Ro (郎) means male. The surname Tsutsuto literally means Gunhead, his hero name. Tsutsu in Tsutsuto is the same reading in Lady Nagant’s real name, Kaina Tsutsumi (筒美火伊那). Although written in a different kanji (筒), which means gun barrel, a reference to her quirk, it has the same connotation as the other one. The given name Kenshiro may be alluded to the main protagonist of Fist of the North Star of the same name, although written in katakana, noting that he is a pro hero whose agency specializes in armed combat and martial arts. Also the Ken in Kenshiro is the same kanji character in Itsuka Kendo’s name (拳藤一佳).
The Fly: Kisuke Koba (小羽黄助, こば きすけ)
Ko (小) means small, Ba or Bane or Hane (羽) means wing or feather, Ki or Ko (黄) means yellow, and Suke (助) means help or assistance. The surname Koba literally means small wings, referring to his appearance and quirk. The Ki in Kisuke means yellow, referring to his blonde hair.
Slugger: Sango Sakagami (阪神三吾, さかがみ さんご)
Saka or Han (阪) means heights or slope, Kami or Gami or Shin (神) means god, San (三) means 3, and Go (吾) means I or my. The surname Sakagami is an alternate reading of Hanshin (阪神), a reference to a popular Japanese pro baseball team, the Hanshin Tigers (阪神タイガース). In the west, the baseball team is primarily (and infamously) remembered for being associated with the curse called “The Curse of the Colonel”, a 1985 Japanese urban legend regarding a reputed curse placed on the baseball team by the ghost of the deceased Kentucky Fried Chicken founder and mascot Colonel Harland Sanders, who passed away 5 years prior at the age of 90. The given name Sango is a play on ’35, the year the Hanshin Tigers were founded, 1935; although the next year, they would be officially formed and have their first season as the “Osaka Tigers”. In 1940, amid anti-foreign sentiment, the Tigers changed the name to "Hanshin" and in 1947 changed the name back to "Osaka Tigers". The current team name was assumed in 1961.
Native: Teppei Nishiriku (西陸哲平, にしりく てっぺい)
Nishi (西) means west, Riku (陸) means land, Tetsu (哲) means philosophy, and Pei or Hei or Hira (平) means flat. The surname Nishiriku means western land, most likely referring to America. The given name Teppei is a play on the word tepee or tipi, a conical tent made by Native Americans.
Selkie: Yasuhiro Hirezaki (鰭崎安洋, ひれざき やすひろ)
Hire (鰭) means fin or flipper (body part), Saki (崎) means cape or peninsula, Yasu (安) means peaceful, and Hiro (洋) means ocean. The Hire in Hirezaki means fin or flipper, referring to his seal physique. It may also be a reference to the Japanese word Kikyakurui (鰭脚類), meaning pinniped. They are a widely distributed and diverse monophyletic group of carnivorous, fin-footed, semi aquatic, mostly marine mammals. They are also commonly referred as seals. In fact, the name "pinniped" derives from the Latin words pinna, meaning fin and pes or pedis, meaning foot, thus giving the literal meaning of fin footed.
Sirius: Miya Otomaru (音丸美弥, おとまる みや)
Oto (音) means sound, Maru (丸) means round, Mi or Bi (美) means beauty, and Ya (弥) means all the more or increasingly. The surname Otomaru means sound around, a reference to her quirk, which allows the user to hear high frequencies around her that humans normally cannot. She uses it to communicate with Selkie when they are far apart. She can also use it to detect the number of people nearby. The given name Miya can be also read as Mimi (耳), which means ear in Japanese, also a reference to her quirk and appearance.
Mr. Brave: Yuichi Kamige (上毛勇一, かみげ ゆういち)
Kami or Ue (上) means up or above or raise, Ge or Mo (毛) means hair, and Isamu (勇) means brave. The surname Kamige literally means raising hair, a reference to his quirk. The given name Yuichi means brave one, a reference to his hero name.
Death Arms: Atsuto Aratake (荒武篤人, あらたけ あつと)
Ara (荒) means rough or wild, Take (武) means military, Atsu (篤) means fervent or serious, and To or Hito (人) means person. The Ara in Aratake and Atsu in Atsuto refer to his serious and rough behavior.
Crust: Mutsuo Tatezaki (盾崎六雄, たてざき むつお)
Tate (盾) means shield (type of personal armor), Zaki or Saki (崎) means cape or edge, Mutsu or Roku (六) means 6, and O (雄) means masculine or male. The Tate in Tatezaki refers to his quirk, shield, which allows him to manifest stone-like, hexagonal shields from their body that could be utilized both defensively and offensively. His given name Mutsuo is a reference to his hexagonal shields.
Yoroi Musha: Takeyoshi Furumoto (古本武義, ふるもと たけよし)
Furu (古) means old or ancient, Moto or Hon (本) means origin or book, Take (武) means military, and Yoshi (義) means righteousness. All of the kanji characters are associated with him. The surname Furumoto can be also read as Furuhon, which means ancient book, possibly referring to old records, text, or illustrations regarding Japanese history and society. The Take in Takeyoshi refers to his hero costume, resembling a samurai, while Yoshi refers to his personality, which is ironic after what happened during the war.
Kesagiri Man: Kenjuro Kuroi (黒井剣寿郎, くろい けんじゅろう)
Kuro (黒) means black, I (井) means water well, Ken (剣) means sword, Ju (寿) means longevity, and Ro (郎) means male. The Kuro in Kuroi refers to the color of his hero outfit, while the Ken in Kenjuro refers to the literal meaning of his hero name - slashing someone with a sword diagonally from the shoulder, Kesagiri (袈裟切り).
Water Hose father: Namihiro Izumi (出水波弘, いずみ なみひろ)
Water Hose mother: Kishiko Izumi (出水岸子, いずみ きしこ)
Knowing that the Water Hose Duo is Kota Izumi’s (出水洸汰) parents, we can obviously assume that they are also named Izumi. Izu (出) means outside, and Mi or Mizu (水) means water. Combined together means flood, Izumi (出水). The surname is also homophonous with fountain in Japanese, Izumi (泉).
For the father: Nami (波) means wave or billow, and Hiro (弘) means vast or wide.
For the mother: Kishi (岸) means beach or shore, and Ko (子) means child.
Nezu: Hideyuki Nezu (根津秀幸, ねず ひでゆき)
Assuming that Nezu is his surname, I would give him his given name only. Ne (根) means root, Zu or Tsu (津) means harbor, Hide (秀) means excellence, and Yuki (幸) means happiness or fortune. His surname is meant to be a play on rat in Japanese, Nezumi (鼠), and his given name is a common Japanese male name, which fits his personality.
Kido: Ryota Kido (貴堂良太, きどう りょうた)
Ki (貴) means noble, Do (堂) means temple or hall, Ryo (良) means good, and Ta (太) means plump or thick. His surname is homophonous to that of his hero name (キドウ) and his respective quirk traject in Japanese, Kido (軌道).
Onima: Junji Onima (鬼馬淳次, おにま じゅんじ)
Oni or Ki (鬼) means demon, Ma (馬) means horse, Jun (淳) means pure, and Ji (次) means next. His surname is homophonous to that of his hero name (オニマー).
X-Less: Mitsuyuki Hoshimoto (星本光行, ほしもと みつゆき)
Hoshi (星) means star, Moto or Hon (本) means origin or book, Mitsu (光) means light, and Yuki (行) means line. His name is a reference to his quirk laser, where he fires energy beams from his right eye.
Shishido: Daisho Shishido (獅子戸大昌, ししど だいしょう)
Shishi (獅子) means lion, Do (戸) means door, Dai or O (大) means big, and Sho (昌) means prosperous or clear. His surname is homophonous to that of his hero name (シシド) and the fact that the first two syllables of his surname fits with him being called the lion hero. Shishido is also an actual surname, but written as宍戸 instead, with the initial kanji character meaning muscles or meat.
Airjet: Hayato Kamizora (上空早人, かみぞら はやと)
Kami or Ue (上) means up or above or raise, Zora or Sora (空) means sky, Haya (早) means early or fast, and To or Hito (人) means person. His surname is a reference to the fact that he can shoot blasts of air above the ground as high as he wants.
Fourth Kind: Shugo Shinomiya (四宮修悟, しのみや しゅうご)
Shi (四) means 4, Miya (宮) means temple or palace, Shu or Osamu (修) means discipline, and Go or Satoru (悟) means enlightenment. The Shi in Shinomiya refers to the fact that he has 4 arms in his appearance. Not a Kaguya reference.
Takeshita: Yoshiyuki Takeshita (竹下吉幸, たけした よしゆき)
This character in the manga and anime is named that way, which is an actual surname, which means I would give him his given name only. Take (竹) means bamboo, Shita (下) means below or under, Yoshi (吉) means good luck or joy, and Yuki (幸) means happiness or fortune. The Take in Takeshita is likely a reference to his unnamed bamboo quirk.
Eel Boy: Teruki Unagi (宇凪輝樹, うなぎ てるき)
U (宇) means roof, Nagi (凪) means calm, Teru (輝) means shine or illuminate, and Ki (樹) means tree. His surname is homophonous with eel in Japanese, Unagi (鰻), referring to his unnamed eel quirk. Interestingly, in My Hero Academia: Vigilantes, there is a character with a similar sounding name, Teruo Unagisawa (鰻沢照生), unrelated to the character above. I made that name up without realization, so I must say it’s almost a coincidence.
Briareos: Gosaku Tezawa (手澤郷作, てざわ ごうさく)
Gyges: Gosuke Tezawa (手澤郷輔, てざわ ごうすけ)
Knowing that the two guards present during the Assault on Tartarus are brothers, we can assume that they share the same surname. Te (手) means hand or arm, and Zawa or Sawa (澤) means swamp, referring to their appearance.
For Briareos: Go (郷) means village or hometown, and Saku (作) means make or prepare.
For Gyges: Go (郷) means village or hometown, and Suke (輔) means help or assistance.
Public Safety Commission President: Yasuko Hoki (保喜安子, ほき やすこ)
Ho (保) means protection or guarantee, Ki (喜) means delight or rejoice, Yasu (安) means peaceful, and Ko (子) means child. Combining both the initial kanji characters of both her surname and given name would mean security in Japanese, Hoan (保安), referring to her position in the Hero Public Safety Commission.
2nd user: Hayao Nikaido (二階堂速雄, にかいどう はやお)
Ni (二) means 2, Kai (階) means story, stair or floor, Do (堂) means temple or hall, Haya (速) means quick or fast, and O (雄) means male. For the given name Hayao, the Haya in Hayao is the same one in his quirk "Gearshift" in Japanese, Hensoku (変速). The surname Nikaido has the kanji character for 2, Ni (二), referencing the fact that he is the 2nd user of OFA. Something I would like to share - the first time I encountered the surname Nikaido came from a staff member whose name was credited with that surname in most of Mob Psycho 100's episodes in the end credits. As soon as I saw the name 二階堂 in the end credits, that gave me an idea to use that surname as a what-if name for the 2nd user, so that's how I arrived with that surname. I never intended to name him after an anime staff member whatsoever.
3rd user: Sanjiro Undo (運道三治郎, うんどう さんじろう)
Un (運) means luck or fortune, Do (道) means road or path, San (三) means 3, Ji (治) means reign or cure, and Ro (郎) means male. The surname is read as "oondo" and not in the English word as it appears to be in romanized form. Also, the aforementioned surname is homophonous with movement in Japanese, Undo (運動), as his quirk Fa Jin is used for to build up kinetic energy by repeating regular motions and store it for later use. Kinetic energy in Japanese is Undo Enerugii (運動エネルギー). The given name Sanjiro has the kanji character for 3, San (三), referencing the fact that he is the 3rd user of OFA.
6th user: Enzo Rokuhara (六原煙造, ろくはら えんぞう)
Roku (六) means 6, Hara (原) means field, En or Kemuri (煙) means smoke, and Zo (造) means create or make. The surname Rokuhara has the kanji character for 6, Roku (六), referencing the fact that he is the 6th user of OFA. The given name Enzo is a reference to his quirk Smokescreen, which would give the character's nickname as En. The surname is also the name of a Japanese railway station in Kanegasaki, Iwate. Interestingly enough, two other characters in the series, whom both of them are villains, are also named after real world Japanese railway stations. The villains in question are Twice and Re-Destro. Twice's real surname is Bubaigawara (分倍河原), named after a railway station operated jointly by the East Japan Railway Company and the private railway operator Keio Corporation located in Fuchu, Tokyo of the same name, while Re-Destro's real surname is Yotsubashi (四ツ橋), named after a railway station in Nishi-ku, Osaka of the same name.
Wolfram: Shigeki Kinzoku (金続重樹, きんぞく しげき)
Kin (金) means metal, Zoku (続) means to continue, Shige (重) means heavy, and Ki (樹) means tree or wood. The surname Kinzoku is homophonous to Kinzoku (金属), in which the latter kanji character, Zoku (属), means genus. However, the Zoku in Kinzoku (金続) means to continue, referring to how he manipulates and creates metal continuously in combat. The Shige in Shigeki refers to how generally heavy metal is. Not to mention that his villain name is named after tungsten, whose symbol W means wolfram, and it is one of the heaviest naturally stable elements you can carry or hold (but factually speaking, uranium IS the heaviest element in terms of natural stability).
Nine: Kisho Terunaga (照永起昇), てるなが きしょう)
Teru (照) means shine or illuminate, Naga or Ei (永) means eternity, Ki (起) means rouse or get up, and Sho (昇) means rise up. The Teru in Terunaga likely refers to his intimidating appearance, akin to a god, while Naga likely refers to the fact that he would be invincible like any other villain if he has a great amount of quirks, considering that he is one of the few characters to do so. The given name Kisho is homophonous with weather, Kisho (気象), a reference to his original quirk before amalgamating to All for One, weather manipulation, or Kisho Sosa in Japanese (気象操作).
All for One: Majin Shigaraki (死柄木摩甚, しがらき まじん)
According to All for One himself in a flashback, Shigaraki is his real surname; however, his given name is unknown. Shi (死) means death, Gara (柄) means grip or handle, Ki (木) means tree or wood, Ma (摩) means to scrape or grind, and Jin (甚) means extreme or intense. The given name Majin is homophonous with devil in Japanese, Majin (魔神).
Mustard: Shoki Kitai (北井祥基, きたい しょうき)
Kita (北) means north, I (井) means water well, Sho (祥) means auspicious or good omen, and Ki (基) means fundamentals or basis. The surname Kitai is homophonous with gas in Japanese, Kitai (気体), a reference to his quirk. The given name Shoki is homophonous with miasma in Japanese, Shoki (瘴気), a highly unpleasant or unhealthy smell or vapor, fitting with the properties of his quirk.
Innsmouth: Yakishi Takonuma (蛸沼焼司, たこぬま やきし)
Tako (蛸) means octopus, Numa (沼) means marsh, Yaki (焼) means burnt, and Shi (司) means administer or boss. The Tako in Takonuma is a reference to his appearance, resembling an octopus.
Moonfish: Takanari Habashi (歯橋高成, はばし たかなり)
Ha (歯) means tooth, Hashi (橋) means bridge, Taki (高) means tall or high, Nari (成) means grow or reach. The surname Habashi is a reference to his quirk blade-tooth in Japanese, Shijin (歯刃).
Ending: Shingoki Kurodo (黒道伸剛輝, くろどう しんごうき)
Kuro (黒) means black, Do or Michi (道) means road or path, Shin (伸) means to expand or stretch, Go (剛) means sturdy or strength, and Ki or Teru (輝) means shine, or gleam. The surname Kurodo means black road, referring to how he activates his quirk through a road or highway. The given name Shingoki is homophonous with traffic lights in Japanese, Shingoki (信号機).
Starservant: Noriharu Hoshimiya (星宮典治, ほしみや のりはる)
Hoshi (星) means star, Miya (宮) means temple or palace, Nori or Ten (典) means law or rule, and Haru or Chi or Ji (治) means reign or subdue. The surname Hoshimiya means star temple or star palace, referring to his villain name. The given name Noriharu can be alternatively read as Tenchi (天地), which means above and below, top and bottom, or more symbolically, heaven and earth. The third meaning could possibly be referring to the phrase “Heaven and Earth are about to collide”, one of the taglines to the 1998 asteroid disaster film Deep Impact, since the villain himself is a preacher who ensures the society that the end of the world is nigh.
Dictator: Reiji Shiki (志紀令司, しき れいじ)
Shi (志) means will or intention, Ki (紀) means chronicle or history, Rei (令) means orders or command, and Shi (司) means administer or boss. The surname Shiki is homophonous with command, direction, or supervision in Japanese, Shiki (指揮), while the given name Reiji is reverse for command or control in Japanese, Shirei (司令), both referencing his quirk despot.
Kunieda: Ikunobu Kunieda (國枝育伸, くにえだ いくのぶ)
Kuni (國) means country, Eda (枝) means bough or branch, Iku (育) means grow or raise, and Nobu (伸) means to expand or stretch. The villain name Kunieda, which is written in katakana, is an actual surname in Japan, so I had to use the kanji version of that name. The given name Ikunobu means growing and expanding, both of which are referring to his quirk that has the ability to sprout and grow gigantic flowers, spores, and fungus-like plants from the ground.
Gigantomachia: Goro Onikigawa (鬼木川吾郎, おにきがわ ごろう)
Oni or Ki (鬼) means demon, Ki (木) means tree, Kawa or Gawa (川) means river, Go (吾) means I or my, and Ro (郎) means male. The Oni in Onikigawa refers to his demonic appearance, while his given name Goro is a play on the Japanese onomatopoeia Goro Goro (ゴロゴロ), which describes the sound of thunder, earthquake, or other disasters incoming, fitting with his personality during the Paranormal Liberation War Arc.
Iceman: Geten Koriyama (氷山外典, こおりやま げてん)
Kori (氷) means ice, Yama (山) means mountain, Ge or Soto (外) means outside, and Ten or Nori (典) means law. The surname Koriyama is an alternate reading of Hyozan, which means iceberg, fitting with his quirk. The given name Geten means apocrypha, which is a story of unknown author or origin. While Geten is the real name of Iceman, it is unknown if it’s his given name or surname, so randomly assuming that this is his given name, his surname would be unknown, and that explains the surname’s existence. (NOTE: With the recent release of Chapter 387 on May 8, 2023, it was revealed that Geten happened to be from Rei's side, which means that his surname is Himura, and this made him a relative to the Todoroki family members, so his full name is Geten Himura. It was not explicitly stated how Rei, or even the Todoroki family, and Geten were specifically related and just listed their relation as simply "relative". With this revelation, his full name written in Japanese would be 氷叢外典, or in hiragana, ひむら げてん. As of this writing, this is the only entry on the list with a character's officially confirmed full name in the original source, so I would discard my ideal surname in favor of the original source instead.)
Unnamed Cider House leader: Gyokoten Samukawa (寒川凝古天, さむかわ ぎょうこてん)
Samu (寒) means cold, Kawa (川) means river, Gyo (凝) means stiff, Ko or Furu (古) means old or ancient, and Ten (天) means heaven. The surname Samukawa means cold river. The given name Gyokoten is homophonous with freezing point in Japanese - Gyokoten (凝固点). The first kanji of the word Gyo (凝) is the same as in the given name. His alias or villain name was never revealed as well, so Yeti (イエティ) would be a good choice, named after the ape-like creature purported to inhabit the Himalayan mountain range in Asia of the same name.
Keigo's Father: Keiichi Takami (鷹見啓一, たかみ けいいち)
This character in the manga and anime is named that way, which means I would give him his given name only. Taka (鷹) means hawk, Mi (見) means to see, Kei (啓) means disclose, open, or say, and Ichi (一) means 1. The Kei in Keiichi is the same as his son Keigo (啓悟).
Habit Headgear: Takehiko Kito (鬼頭武彦, きとう たけひこ)
Oni or Ki (鬼) means demon, To or Atama (頭) means head, Take (武) means military, and Hiko (彦) means lad or boy. His surname is a reference to his unnerving appearance. Not a Demon Slayer reference.
Giant Villain: Kiichi Otomo (大友毅一, おおとも きいち)
O or Dai (大) means big, Tomo (友) means friend, Ki or Tsuyo (毅) means strong, and Ichi (一) means 1. His name is a reference to his appearance and personality. Ironic that he is the first villain to appear in the series, yet has a character that means friend.
Sludge Villain: Sohei Dorokawa (泥川創平, どろかわ そうへい)
Doro (泥) means mud, Kawa or Gawa (川) means river, So or Hajime (創) means begin or start, and Hei or Pei or Hira (平) means flat. His surname is a reference to his dirty mud-like appearance.
Swordkil: Takeshi Mekajiki (目梶木丈士, めかじき たけし)
Me (目) means eye, Kaji (梶) means sculling oar, Ki (木) means tree or wood, Take (丈) means height or stature, and Shi (士) means samurai. His surname is homophonous with swordfish in Japanese, Mekajiki (眼梶木), which is a reference to his unnamed sword quirk, as well as his villain name, though close.
Daigo: Daigo Saruno (猿野大悟, さるの だいご)
Saru (猿) means monkey, No (野) means field, Dai or O (大) means big, and Go or Satoru (悟) means enlightenment. His surname is a reference to his beast-like appearance, while his given name is the same as that of Daigo Yamamoto (山本大悟), the character’s voice actor, also simply known (and credited) by his given name, Daigo. He is part of the Japanese comedy duo Chidori (千鳥), who made a cameo appearance in My Hero Academia: Two Heroes as two of Wolfram’s minions.
Nobu: Nobuyuki Katai (片井信行, かたい のぶゆき)
Kata (片) means part or fragment, I (井) means water well, Nobu (信) means faith or truth, and Yuki (行) means line. His surname is can be also read as Heni, which is homophonous with displacement (physics) in Japanese, Heni (変位), a reference to his unnamed displacement quirk, while his given name is the same as that of Nobuyuki Hayakawa (早川信行), the character’s voice actor, also simply known (and credited) by his nickname, Nobu (ノブ). Like the previous entry on the list, he is also part of the Japanese comedy duo Chidori (千鳥), who made a cameo appearance in My Hero Academia: Two Heroes as two of Wolfram’s minions.
Glutton God: Shigeo Shokuzawa (食澤茂雄, しょくざわ しげお)
Shoku (食) means food, Zawa or Sawa (澤) means swamp, Shige (茂) means overgrown or grow thick, and O (雄) means masculine or male. His surname is a reference to his appearance, as well as his villain name in Japanese, Kuishin (食神).
Sanctum: Seizo Jiyumiya (自由宮聖造, じゆうみや せいぞう)
Ji (自) means oneself, Yu (由) means wherefore, Miya (宮) means temple or palace, Sei (聖) means holy, and Zo (造) means create or make. His surname means freedom temple, and Seizo means holy structure, referring to his villain name.
The Mother of Quirks: Seiko Yotsubashi (四ツ橋聖子, よつばし せいこ)
Knowing the Mother of Quirks is the mother of Chikara Yotsubashi (四ツ橋主税), I would give her given name only. Yotsu (四ツ) means 4, Hashi (橋) means bridge, Sei (聖) means holy, and Ko (子) means child. I chose Seiko as her given name for a reason, because her name, when Romanized, is an anagram for quirk in Japanese, Kosei (個性), since she was the first person to use the word "quirk" to describe meta abilities.
Shie Hassaikai boss: Takahito Saijo (斎条崇人, さいじょう たかひと)
Sai (斎) means purification, Jo (条) means article, Taka (崇) means respect or revere, and To or Hito (人) means person. The Sai in Saijo is the same character in Shie Hassaikai (死穢八斎會), while his given name fits given with his position during the time he founded the organization years before Kai Chisaki succeeded him.
Hood: Tsuyoshi Aida (会田強士, さいじょう たかひと)
Ai or Kai (会) means meeting or association, Ta or Da (田) means rice field, Tsuyo (強) means strong, and Shi (士) means samurai. His name fits since he used to be a street punk who made a living as a fierce underground fighter before being turned into a Nomu by the Doctor.
Gunga Mountain Villa Paranormal Liberation Front Commander: Kairo Dendo (傳堂会呂, でんどう かいろ)
Den (傳) means propagate or transmit, Do (堂) means temple or hall, Kai or Ai (会) means meeting or association, and Ro (呂) means spine or backbone. His surname is homophonous with electric or conduction in Japanese, Dendo (電動) or Dendo (伝導) respectively, while his given name is homophonous with circuit in Japanese, Kairo (回路), both referring to his quirk amplivolt, which can conduct and amplify electricity within their body, being able to release it afterwards. Ironic that he was never given a name, yet his quirk, as well as his ultimate move, is named in the manga and anime.
​
That is all I can present. If you know a character whose real name is unknown, comment down below and formulate his or her real name based on the character's qualities. Thank you!