Hey guys!
TLDR at bottom
Some background context, we were walking our 10yo GreatDanexMastiff with some doggy friends. We get to the offleash area at the park and I see this big Husky strutting around and I get a little worried. My dog is really friendly unless it's an unneutered male (my dog is fixed). His bully breed tendencies come out and he doesn't submit in a fight so I avoid any male dogs that could present a problem. He is an open book usually, you can tell immediately if he doesn't like another dog I'm new to the area and the people I was walking with warned me that this Husky is rather aggressive and tends to attack a lot of the other dogs including their dog on 2 occasions. I leashed my dog and was trying to leave. His dog came up and there was a little altercation I managed to break up by kicking a stick at the Husky feet while gribbing the collar on my dog. The guy then proceed to say DW it'll be a good lesson if his dog gets bitten by mine. I'm less than impressed and told him my dog is 10, I don't want him getting into a fight with an unfixed Husky in his prime that will be incredibly vicious. So I told him I would leave since he clearly wasn't willing to put a leash on his dog. We left with our dogs to a different park entirely. Everything is going great until I see the husky and now another dog, whom based off everyone elses reaction is also trouble. It's an oval with one entrance and they have to walk down a hill to get in so they most definitely saw us. We leash up the dogs and leave, husky comes over to investigate again so I give my partner the leash and block the Husky and tell him to back off - he does. We throw him a ball and off he goes.
Not long after we are at another area just letting the dogs have a last quick run before heading off (I didn't trust the owner and husky to not follow us again) when suddenly over the hill the husky appears heading straight for my dog. It's right next to me but It happens so quickly. It was a horrifically vicious dog fight, when I tried to pull the husky off by his legs he had his teeth sunk in my dogs skull and was tearing it open, I was too scared getting bitten to do much more than try and throw my jumper between them to break line of sight and attempt to snag the husky while the guys trying to pull them apart. At some point the owner comes sprinting up, body slams into his dog kicking and punching, we pull my dog away and separate them.
At this stage I'm seeing red because he kept following us, I told him the dogs don't get along and there was just no control by him. I start yelling at him that he is irresponsible and some choice words for following us and that he is responsible for his dog attacking mine. He looks ready to square up to me but apparently my partner is staring him down over my shoulder and he walks away saying he's being nice to me today.
I look at my dog and see the extent of the damage and loose my mind again. I demand he pay my vet bills and owe up to his fault, he tells me to fuck off so I call him a coward - Not the best way to handle the situation but I felt furious and it felt good dressing down a man 3x my size if I'm being honest.
We call the cops, they can't do anything. I'm currently on a 1k vet bill and he may loose his eye. What can I do in this situation? In hindsight I should have left after he followed me the first time and probably not blown up at him so much but just based off the encounters I have heard from the other dog owners I didn't feel like being another women he bullies around
I know that reality is that if his dog is taken away from him it'll get put down. I don't blame his dog at all, a dog is a dog after all but it's a big aggressive dog that's has a attack histor that he isn't being responsible with and never has on a leash from what I've been told. He would have killed my dog if we hadn't separated them, and what if someone less experienced or younger who doesn't know what to do in that situation gets in the crossfire.
TLDR: my dog got viciously attacked by an aggressive uneutered husky, police said they can't do anything, vet bill is already at 1k and owner refused to take ownership of his loss of control. We have the dog's name and photos of him and his dog. Other people have had his dog attack theirs before and apparently multiple complaints have been submitted. Has anyone got any idea what to do here?
Sorry for the wall of text and any grammaformating issues. On my phone and angry all over again writing this out

Totally new to this, would love critique on my first chapter. Give it to me real. I want to improve: this may just be a hobby but I love it!
What you see on Page One.

Read Seekers, until daytime fades to candlelight, For magic is found when ink breathes life to parchment, When bookbindings break and cradled words take flight. It’s the safety of cozying up near the warming hearth, And the rising steam from a wellworn mug It’s that smile when you turn the page in delight. 

That cool little quote thing before a chapter starts that gives you background.

West of the Citadel Clouds, Bordering Mountain Pines and fickle Seashine Lies the renowned Port Cardica Where sailors sing and blight-born orphans dream. 

Chapter 1
A Slip Away from Death
Like most boys, Jake chose snoring in the pews over memorizing the Church’s proverbs. A clear mistake, he realized, as the Pastor's warning that “prayer follows danger” proved true. Hanging precipitously from the cliff’s edge, Jake recited every Creed he could remember in a futile attempt to appease any watching Gods.
“Prosper in his light, heathentry outside his sight,” he prayed, feet kicking in a desperate search for better footing.
It was a stowaways’ stanza, a tenet meant to share wisdom in ways the thickest of Port Cardica’s orphan dockboys could understand but, like most doctrine, its religious meaning was lost in translation.
Instead, the impoverished boys interpreted it as a practical warning to keep their heads down. Everyone knew the city’s Nobles revered the Book and claimed their prosperity was proof of Gods’ favor. Of course, beggars knew better: one downward glance at them revealed the decay fueling Cardica’s burgeoning wealth. Still, the poor learned to philosophize quietly. Someone was to blame for the hoveltowns, bird droppings, and penetrating seafood stink, and it better not be you.
For his part, Jake blamed himself. If he’d scaled the cliff wall with just a bit more care and a bit less haste he’d never have slipped. Instead he’d been forced to violently slow his descent, bruising bones and trading skin for friction on the vertical slope. It wasn’t a graceful maneuver by any means, but it beat falling hundreds of feet into the freezing current below. Thankfully, years as a guttersnipe had honed his reflexes – his gangly arms lacked the strength of a Swordsquire or the coordination of a Majpupil, but his daily dance with starvation demanded nimble fingers and quick wit.
That experience wasn’t paying off. As Jake shuffled his feet around to find better purchase, his hands slipped on the accruing condensation from the ongoing manastorm. His grip flagged, then failed, and he had neither the magic nor the strength to escape the weight of gravity.
“It isn't written, it isn’t written” Jake recited frantically as he began to plummet. The other dockboys would laugh at his superstition, but he didn’t care. Many claimed the Creeds were lucky, and Jake desperately needed some luck. Instinctively he spread his arms out as wide as possible, hoping to extend his reach and grip onto something.
By some miracle, It worked. The resounding sound of cloth ripping accompanied Jake as he slammed into the stone cliff, teetering to a stop. He hung like a rag doll, held up only by the hem of his matted, brown tunic; the cheap weavings had snagged and torn on an outcropping of stone.
“Aughhh” he mumbled.
He had survived, but everything hurt. Looking down to inspect the damage, Jake saw that his calloused hands were raw and pebbled, but a quick flex confirmed he hadn’t broken any fingerbones. Breathing a sigh of relief, he gasped at the telltale sting every kicked streetrat knew so well.
“Po-Poet’s hand,” Jake swore.
He grabbed the cliff wall to stabilize himself and, seeing as it had worked so far, continued reciting the few Creeds he could remember. A minute passed before he was able to think clearly, but slowly Jake got his breathing under control and continued his self-assessment.
Overall, he felt like things couldn’t have gone much worse. His cracked ribs hurt and continuing the heist would only exacerbate the damage, leading to scarring or permanent hobbling. Jake had seen many dockbeggars with similar injuries from fights or beatings, unable to walk straight without being plagued by the stitchers cough.
For this reason alone, Jake briefly considered giving up. He quickly dismissed the idea – it might be madness to continue climbing in his condition, but he’d come too far to back out now. He’d planned this heist for months, obsessively pathing his break-in while waiting for a night when security would be light. In retrospect, he’d been a fool; his overly cautious preparations left no possibility for a second attempt before his 15th birthday.
No, despite his injury tonight was still his best hope to successfully steal a Scriptors’ Grimoire before Binding Day. Failure would mean enslavement as a Ruddite or worse, full Automation. He’d just have to trust the windy weather to mute his movements and the harvest moons to light his way.
So, teeth chattering with cold and fear, Jake resumed the ascent. His ribs sang in agony as he put one hand in front of the other, slowly turning small divots into handholds, footholds and leverage. Each bouldering movement made him wince, but over the years he’d honed the art of turning sweat and grit into capillary action. He’d had no other choice; richmen shared a passion for building impenetrable estates, forcing thieves to develop an unshaking hand at scaling them.
Five painstaking minutes of climbing later and Jake regained his original position. Salty sweat matted his brow and stinged his eyes but he persevered. He blinked slowly to clear his vision and shuffled his feet left over right, shivering his way across an inch-wide protrusion. Just a few meters above him stood the lip of the granite outcropping and access to the marble fortress built upon it. Jake tasted copper as he bit the inside of his cheek in anticipation – If the heist went well he’d finally change his destiny and be able to swear upon the Sermon’s Book on his own terms.
But first he had to finish the climb. He knew the manor’s sentries rotated hourly, eyes glued to the sky as they watched for flyingmen and attacks from above. He also knew that all these guards would be literate, but none especially gifted. After all, no one powerful enough to be a Writer would stand watch over another man's fortune. The chartered Maji Wordlings, on the other hand, could easily detect Jake if he hadn’t planned for them in advance. He chose tonight because it was the season’s Lenting, meaning the majority of Maji would be in communion until the sun rose.
“What is written” a gruff voice proclaimed, startling Jake.
It was muffled by the wind, so it took him a moment to realize it was coming from directly above him. Jake craned his neck and peered up; to his horror he could see the silhouette of a guard's shadow on the cliff wall.
Petrified, Jake hugged his body to the cold granite, hoping the darkness of the windy night would hide his form. His entire plan hung on the simple thesis that in a world of magidetectors and magflight, no one would expect an unbound to scale the walls. Great in theory, but what if a guard just happened to look down?
“Is Foretold and Forbidden,” another voice chanted, completing the customary greeting. “All safe on the watch?”
“All is safe and silent, as usual,” the first man grunted.
“Don’t sound so upset,” the second laughed. ”We chose this job because it’s easy, remember? No more treading through the mud, no more war with those blasted barren beasts and their infernal warlocks.”
“That’s true, althou..”
The men’s voices were swept up in the wind as they paced further down the stone perimeter. They hadn’t seen him, but, just to be safe, Jake stayed low until he could no longer hear the stamping of metal-toed boots on stone. Then, fingers white and aching in trepidation, he waited another 30 seconds.
Finishing his count, Jake peaked over the edge. It took all the courage he had earned as a thief and every bit of boldness he had learned as a beggar, but he managed it.
The coast was clear.
Jake carefully pulled himself over the ledge before falling into a crouch. He looked around and exhaled painfully, releasing a breath he had not realized he was holding.
In front of him lay an outdoor walkway culminating in a rippling fountain circumscribed by five basalt pillars of progressively increasing height. Everflowing torches adorned each of the columns and burned despite the rain, casting rings of golden light throughout the open atrium. At the foot of the fountain rose a gold-leafed speaker's lectern, a pure white sculpture of the Sermon Book chiseled open upon it.
Jake stared openmouthed at the power radiating from the fountain before abruptly coming to his senses. Without a doubt this artifact was a Magisma, an extremely expensive construct meant to amplify its controller’s magic. Leaving it outside was a casual display of wealth and power meant to shock and impress, but Jake didn’t have time for that.
Instead Jake blended into the shadows cast by the monument as he sneaked his way across the grounds. After passing the walkway the torchlight dimmed considerably, forcing him to hobble his way in the dark. A bright flash startled him, but the acid smell of tobacco that accompanied it indicated the guards he’d seen earlier were smoking to pass the time. Realizing they were distracted, Jake sped up and almost tripped on the jutting crystals of an emerald rock garden. Embarrassed, he paused to listen for anyone approaching.
Everything was quiet except for the constant pitter, patter and hiss of rain from the manastorm. It seemed his home-invasion had so far gone unnoticed, but the hair on Jake’s neck rose. An unsettling feeling of being watched set in and every few seconds he reflexively looked over his shoulder.
Finally, after what seemed like forever, he made it to the Manor wall. Keeping to the shadows, Jake hid behind the tallest thing he could find; a towering yellow flower with leaves the size of platters that he had never seen before. Staying low, he muddied his knees and toes on the damp ground, but thankfully the foliage protected him from the rain. As his eyes adjusted to less light, Jake noticed all sorts of exotic fruits surrounding him; blood red berries in the shape of teardrops levitated inches off the ground, while turquoise bubbles floated up from vibrant greenery, collapsing quickly into little orange stones that looked remarkably like candy. Jake’s belly growled at the idea of tasting these treats, but he dismissed his urges. Stanzas warned that “those who leave riches unread become starving men” but Jake knew hunger well. He would jeopardize his mission by eating something that might make him sick tonight.
Instead, he focused on gaining entry to the manor. Searching his surroundings, Jake located the iron front doors about 6 meters to his right. They were guarded by life-like statues on either side, one a Korai of the Poet, hand outstretched in greeting, the other a two headed wolf, with both snarling maws crying out to the moons. The door itself was blacked with age and inscribed by a massive oval spellwork that glinted in the light cast by a hanging lantern.
Listening closely, Jake groaned at the buzz of silverscripting coming from the insignia. Every thief knew that spellworks grew more powerful over time, and anything audible would be too powerful for any Unbound to lockpick.

Strap in. Toxic mom tries to ruin my wedding. This tale is long and full of awfulness. I recommend watching some cat videos after this read.
So let me preface this by saying I am estranged from my mother and have been for most of my life. She is a paranoid narcissist, a racist, a homophobe, a xenophobe, and just all around terrible person. She abused me growing up so I cut loose in high school, got emancipated and got on with my life. For years I had a happy queer relationship with another woman and we had a son together (I carried with a sperm donor). When my kid was 5 his other mom died and I was alone for 5 years before I met someone. A year later, that someone and I got married. Previous to said wedding my husband’s parents felt it would be important to meet my parents. My father died when I was 19 so that left my mother and her husband. I struggled over the decision to try and reconnect with my mom, knowing how bad this can get for me in these situations (I suffer severe ptsd from the abuse trauma).. but it was a wedding and everyone kept telling me it “was important to have family together.” So fine, let’s do this. The problems started fast and furious. My mom came to our coast (we live on opposite coasts) to meet my fiancé and my son. Right away she was pulling my husband to the corner to tell him all the “dirt” she could on me, or conversely, telling him he better get me nice cars and plastic surgery. Then she stated calling all of her friends and putting my fiancé on the phone to “prove to them that her daughter was marrying a doctor” (even if he is a goyem (a Yiddish term for non-Jew. Has slightly derogatory tones). Cut to lunch and my mother is asking how many tables she “gets” at the wedding. I ask “huh?” She explains she needs a least 5 tables at 10 per table for HER guests. I was really confused. I explained that our whole wedding venue seated 50 people total and those seats were spoken for. I had invited several people my mother asked me to have already. She went absolutely bananas demanding we change venue (we’re now 6 weeks from the wedding) to accommodate HER GUESTS. I painfully explained we can’t do that.. it’s not possible.. just no. She then switches gears like she always does and asks about our honeymoon. We’re we’re heading to Mexico for 2 weeks and my son would be staying with his donomyBFF. My mom screamed “what??? He needs to be with HIS FAMILY.” I reminded her that he was staying with family. She demanded time with my son so I half heartedly said she could have him half the time. (This will come back to haunt me later.) Cut to the wedding. Did I mention my mom is a low key alkie? So it’s about 2pm and she’s in the bridal suite in the bathroom. I’m in the dress and the photographer is waiting for my mother to come and use an antique button-holer to button up my gown. This is one of the photos we had pre-planned to take. Instead, my mother is in the bathroom half dressed with her fireball and ice screaming into the phone at her husband “you are so stupid, how can you not find it!? I put it on the damn dresser! I can’t f*ing believe I married you…” you get the picture. It’s so loud the guests in the living room can hear it. I finally give up and have my son do the buttonholing for me (the pics were so special). Thank goodness it wasn’t video because you would have her my mother screaming “Can anyone get me another drink?? Does this room even have room service??” Cut to walking down the aisle. We do the ceremony, it’s perfect, and my delightful friend announces “Introducing Mr. & Mrs Jon— when my mom stands up and screams “It’s DOCTOR not MISTER, get it right!” Now I knew we had a problem on our hands ahead of the big day so I put in some contingency plans in place to buffer her. My wedding planner was under strict instructions to not allow my mother to make a speech (she loves to humiliate me by saying personal things about me to anyone who will listen and then she loves to announce what a terrible daughter I am and how much of a disappointment to her.) Second plan was my SIL faking a heart attack if she got her hands on the mic. About half thru dinner my delightful planner comes to me crying saying she’s so sorry but my mom is demanding to make a speech. That’s right, this tiny demon of a woman made my wedding planner CRY. Right then she stood up (have no idea how she got the mic) and said, “So my daughter didn’t want me to say anything. I guess she gets embarrassed, but I’m her MOTHER, and I get to say whatever I want. I’m here to say that I always knew she was going to marry a doctor, it didn’t surprise me at all. What did surprise me is when I gave birth to her and the nurses told me she was a girl, but I didn’t believe them so I had to take her diaper off and spread her legs and look at her vagina to make sure she was a girl.” She illustrated this by spreading her two fingers open. You could here jaws dropping around the room. She then went on to say “how disappointed she was in me that I don’t see her more often and that she hopes now that I have a doctor husband I’ll be able to see her more frequently”. Sadly my SIL was in the loo and plan 2 failed. Cut to the dancing. I am dancing with my husband and my friends. We’re all having a good time when somebody comes up to me and taps me on the shoulder and says “hey, I don’t wanna cause a scene or anything but you might want to look at your mom”. I look over at my mother and she has taken off the jacket to her dress and now she’s peeling off the shoulder straps one by one and waving her head around to the music saying “oh my goodness it’s getting so hot in here!” This btch was trying to take her clothes off on the dance floor. Oh, I forgot to mention earlier that she had a three drink maximum, but she was getting around this by asking other people to get drinks for her. Cut to the next morning and I got to hear alllllll the embarrassing stories from the night before. She asked why my friend married “an Arab,” called another guest “not Jewish enough to attend the wedding” and complained to anyone who would listen that I didn’t even allow her 50 guests, and the party would have been so much more fun if she had done it. And the pièce de ré·sis·tance? As we were leaving for our honeymoon I got a call from her saying “I know you need me to watch your kid, but not unless you do something for me. You’ll need to call your brother and make nice with him again.” My brother and I are estranged for reasons I can’t get into now. I said no, he’ll go to his real family, the one that cares for him without strings attached. There you have it! One cluster fuck of a Mother of the Bride story! For anyone interested, we don’t talk anymore and I couldn’t be happier. Good riddance to bad rubbish!

The soldiers lined on Ardenholms beaches. Their bright, jewel encrusted armor flashed brightly in the glaring summers sun. The warriors were eager to get on with their game of conquering and subjugating. They were Ardenholmites, Humilauians, and Pommedorans, as well as Tuberite religious warriors hailing from Solanum. They were gathered in Ardenholm to prepare for an imminent invasion from Veritas and their leader, BB.
Ardenholm, Humilau and especially Pommedora were in open rebellion from BB. They thought of him as a tyrannical leader, levying heavy taxes and other unreasonable demands. They finally decided to declare themselves separate from BB, but the turmoil quickly devolved into a fight for control of the entire island chain.
Pommedora was a Tuberist nation, so they called upon their Solanarian brothers to help the fight. The Tuberists, thinking it would be an easy battle, happily joined in.
As the Tuberites made the short voyage to Pommedora, tensions arose. There was an attempt to reestablish diplomatic relations which quickly broke down, resulting in a raid from Veritas on Pommedora, their closest neighbor.
The Tuberites arrived far too late to join the fray, but fortunately the raid was mostly scared off before any real fighting could occur, and the casualties were 6 in Pommedora, after a single arrow barrage and 8 Veritasian raiders who brought their boat too close to the walls and were sunk by a well placed explosive firework.
Thus began an alarmingly fast arms race. Both sides were on islands, so a full force invasion was not viable…yet. Seemingly overnight the once windswept and backwater islands in rebellion turned to industry. The once salty and warm air choked with the smoke from the flames of fires roaring in their mighty hearths. Peaceful and sunny harbors because overrun with heavy bots of war.
Veritas kept pace with the industrial might and the islands were equal in strength. Both bought mercenaries to fight, but Veritas gained a significant upper hand by taking a hefty loan from bankers overseas and buying much better metals than could ever be reaped from the earth on the barren island chain.
Finally the mines were depleted of what little resources they could muster. Though bright earthen metals were occasionally still warm from being melted and pounded into their molds.
With no more brawn games to play, both sides made a quick shift to mind games. Spies. Spies everywhere. In the streets. In the factories. In the harbors. Everywhere. Private conversations became public knowledge overnight. The town square of Ardenholm ran red with the blood of those suspected of treason.
Next came the starvation. The already small fields had been neglected because the farmers had been made to become factory workers. This time, the rebellion got the upper hand, with the Tuberists providing food from their vast fields back in Solanaria. Veritas attempted a naval blockade to stop the shipment of food from arriving. The Tuberists didn’t slow down. The naval commander ordered them to hold. The Tuberists, already very near to the maximum pace, almost appeared to speed up. Finally they stopped just outside of cannon range. They waited in a locked stalemate for 3 days until the Veritasians ran out of water and were forced to return to port. Thus, they spent the winter on meager rations and had to sell some of their newly bought steel to pay for food.
Finally, after a long and cold winter of light eating and intense stare-offs, the spring blossomed in the remaining fields.
The Veritasians had survived the winter by the skin of their teeth and knew that they could not survive another winter. This years winter had been astoundingly warm (by West Phagosian standards). In fact, this was the warmest winter ever recorded.
Over on Pommedora, which at this point had been established as the capital, the situation was almost as grim. The Tuberists, who were creeping up on a years time spent on an island were becoming increasingly obstinate and downright treasonous. They longed to go back to their homeland, and run on green fields, with gently rolling hills bordered by lush, fertile marshes, encased by the great mountains far to the west, just where the eye could see them. They downright despised the cramped island.
Tensions were starting to boil over on all sides of the war, until finally the spy game did its job. The Pommedorans received definitive proof that the Veritasians would be sailing for a “surprise” attack on Ardenholm in one months time. This was the break they needed and with this knowledge they could easily win the war.
Under the cover of darkness they began to very slowly and methodically ship soldier to Ardenholm. They arrived on mail boats and pleasure crafts, in wine barrels and tiny crude rafts. Simultaneously, these same craft evacuated the women and children, bringing them safely to Pommedora.
Then, the day before the battle, an idea was had. It was decided that instead of defending the city they should go on the offensive while the opposing military was away. The idea was they would go quickly to Veritas and slay BB, and then swiftly bring his head back over to Ardenholm where his army, seeing that they had nothing to fight for, would surrender.
There were problems with this plan, though. The entire army was already on Ardenholm, and Pommedora was still the closest island to Veritas, so it would make no sense to keep an army anywhere but there. Also, the ships would probably sail right by each other on their way to conquer their respective islands.
“None the matter with these details” said the commanders, “This plan is too good to pass up.”
And thus we pick up where we started, with the solders, armed to the teeth, sitting in the early morning sun, waiting for their boats to take them to Veritas.
They boarded and set off. 1/10 of the army was left behind to There was nothing but excitement as they lost sight of the shore. The soldiers were tremendously confident in their plan.
The boats sailed for 38 minutes without interruption.
Suddenly, a lookout sounded their horn. The soldiers instantaneously switched from their excited and eager chatter to silence as they looked on the horizon, expecting to see a fleet of opposing ships.
Instead they saw a tiny island. Barely even an island. More like a sad sandbar. The entire island was completely covered in Veritasian troops. They were all standing on the island, their bodies facing the fleet. They were all watching the fleet sail by.
All wielded a dull blue trident, the color of cold and drear ocean
Then one, the commander most likely, stepped forth and walked slowly to the edge of the shore, about 10 feet. He stopped at the edge and dipped the pronged fork of his trident into the water
Not a single eye strayed from his trident as it leapt to life. It’s dull and sad color replaced by an electric blue. The blue started from where the water touched the prongs and snaked down the trident at a decently fast pace.
Then he did the most unexpected thing of all, and fell face first into the water. All eyes remained on where he fell. The seconds ticked by. 15. 30. 60. 90. Was he dead? 120. Then at 133 exactly he sprang from the water. His right hand clamped so tightly around his trident his knuckles were bleached like dead coral. He sailed 50 meters in the air, well above the masts of the boats, and about 150 meters towards the boats.
Then his army all seemingly sprang to life and walked swiftly to the waters edge. It was a trap! They didn’t pause for dramatic effect like he did, diving headfirst into the water and sailing through the air with almost no delay.
The archers attempted to ready their bows but the boats were already packed tight with men, horses, cannons, and all sorts of equipment of war.
The tridenteers sprang forth and plunged into the ocean like rain. A hundred a twenty, they numbered. They rapidly began closing the distance. The archers pulled back their bows and waited for them to get into firing range. They quickly closed in. Finally, they were in shooting distance and they fired. None of the shots struck. In fact, none even came close. The soldiers were simply too small to hit accurately, especially from a rocking boat.
The tridenteers then passed overhead, and did the most unexpected thing of all. A few reached into their pouches and pulled out a single gray stick about the size of a baton. They then dropped them.
All of the tridenteers possessed 8 of these sticks, so most waited until they had clear shots to drop. A few thought they did right then, and threw their sticks towards the ships.
All except one missed. It was tremendously hard to fire accurately while trying to dodge projectiles.
The one that didn’t miss sailed down, down, down until it landed barely on the port side of a medium sized Humilauian cruiser. The wood of the boat was no match for the explosion that rang out. The front port side was torn. The water spout produced from the explosion went 15 meters into the air.
The ship sank in 2 minutes.
Immediately it’s neighboring boats turned sharply to rescue the screaming survivors. The tridenteers passed about a kilometer away from the boats before veering to the left and turning to made another pass.
The ships were thoroughly spooked, and most moved to do evasive maneuvers.
Suddenly, three powerful horn blasts rang out. This was the sign to press forth. The ships readjusted course to fan out, but 9 blasts rang out, the sign to stick together.
A second pass was made with 2 ships sunk. Another pass was made, but no ships were sunk. Than another with no ships. Another with 1. Another with 1. Another with none. This continued until 87 passes were made. There were 137 boats in total at the beginning, 7 large, 38 medium and 94 small. 93 remained. There were 4 large boats remaining (the 3 that were sunk had been sunk at the very beginning), 15 medium boats, and 75 small boats. Almost all of the surviving medium and large boats had tied themselves together with rope and formed a sort of floating pontoon. This greatest increased the sailing time, and a journey of 3 hours took 6.
Not all of the ships that were lost had sunk. Of the 19 small boats that were not present in the final fleet, only 2 had actually been sunk.
There had been a sort of mutiny aboard some of the smaller boats after the 8th pass. 2 of the 7 large boats had been hit and were sinking and the situation was looking very dire. In the rear, 9 of the small boats and 8 of the medium boats (the medium boats were the very end of the fleet) all mutinied against their captains, with three being stabbed to death and one being cast into the sea and turned around back to Ardenholm. Watching them sail away nearly caused the entire fleet to break apart but they were guided by a common foe.
A few of the boats lagged behind. 4 medium boats couldn’t keep pace due to being non-fatally struck and turned around. The tridenteers were more given orders to at least damage the ships heavily enough to force them to turn around, so they allowed those ships to flee.
3 small ships, in an interesting turn of fate, were nearest to the islands when the bombing started. They were the ones who had sounded the alarm. The tridenteers had passed over them entirely without dropping a single bomb. They were still horrified watching the preliminary carnage before the ships could form up, and decided to run themselves around on the tiny island the Veritasians had started out in.
They hid under the 6 palm trees for 8 days, not knowing anything about the status of any of the nations. They survived by eating the horses they had brought and drinking the wine they had brought which they were going to celebrate with once the island was conquered.
Finally, after 6 hours, the boats sighted Veritas. The midday sun was high in the air and the archers could not see the trident weilders through the sun, accelerating their losses.
Veritas looked abandoned. The alarm has been raised but very few troops were on the walls, looking very frightened.
The soldiers let out a halfhearted cheer upon laying eyes on the island. The Veritasian tridents veered right after the fleet made their way into the smooth natural harbor.
The tridenteers had only lost 11. 7 from lucky bow shots, 3 from the binding from their wrists to their tridents slipping off, and 1 stupid soldier who tried to land on a small boat and was instantly slain.
The boats neared the docks of Veritas. The harbor wasn’t much of a harbor at all, only having a narrow wave-break sandspit that only extended past a third of the docks.
The boats made passes towards the docks, with some soldiers being so desperate to get off of them they leaped from the boats and swam to shore.
The boats all started to unload as normal, with horses being placed on the shore and equipment to breach the great gate of Veritas being unloaded
Suddenly the great gate of Veritas, which was expected to be a large obstacle swung open and half of Veritas’s army (still a formidable number mind you) roared forth, banging their shields and sprinted at the unprepared rebels.
This was not expected at all, and no precautions for this had been taken. The rebels on the beach all turned to run back to the boats when, alas! The tridenteers reappeared from out of nowhere behind the boats. They hurtled towards the boats, flying much more recklessly now, and dropped their bombs. The boats were not moving this time, and 8 were struck.
In the same run, 47 of the tridenteers dropped their explosives on top of the docks, blowing all except two up.
This mostly stranded the peoples on the shore, whose only option now was the rowboats from the large ships. Some ran towards those but right then the charging army from the gates slammed into those on the shore.
18 rowboats were cast off, from the beach and the rest were not able to. The battle for the beach was a terrible situation for the rebels with them being completely pinned against the sea.
1/6 of the seaborn army was slain and 1/6 of the army surrendered on the beach, totaling 1/3 of invasion, or exactly 642 men.
The boats tried to leave the harbor but all tried to leave at once and a few collisions occurred. The boats that made it out were harassed by the tridenteers the entire time.
To top it off, the winds were blowing in an awful direction and most of the boats were blown far to the right. They nearly crashed into an walled peninsula. The horn of orders was silent because the ship they were on had taken a direct hit and was rapidly sinking.
Due to the lack of orders, all ships had their own idea of what to do. Most of them thought that the wind was far too unfavorable to set into open water so decided to land on the peninsula. About 1/3 decided to try the winds and sailed in various directions to various islands. This time, the tridenteers could harass them all they wanted and most would not get far.
Those who landed on the peninsula were met with an immediate problem. Unloading. Most of the men jumped overboard to swim to shore and some ships went completely unmanned before being either sunk or captured by the opposing force.
There was one final factor that was at play. The peninsula itself. It was very long and narrow. So narrow that a tridenteer could safely jump all the way over it without being dashed apart on the rocks.
A single tridenteer sprang fourth. Their bright blue trident electric against the sky, which was growing progressively cloudier. They reached into their pocket and pulled out one of the sticks. They lazily let it go before safely landing in the water on the other side.
They didn’t even have to aim. It exploded on the peninsula and some were caught in the blast.
The other tridenteers followed suit. There were only 26 archers still armed as almost all of them had either abandoned their gear or were weighed down by it trying to swim over and drowned.
The entire peninsula was scourged. The walls extended to the beach on either side, and the coast became far too treacherous and rocky to swim around.
40% of the entire army was slain on the peninsula. A further 20% (of the men on the peninsula) surrendered and only 19 men escaped. 9 on a rowboat that was let go because of its irrelevance and 10 somehow survived the swim around the walls and ran up the island before stealing a sailboat and escaping.
Those that turned around and fled immediately suffered casualties, but not to the scale of this. About 5% of the army died on the sail back from getting picked off. Most of the tridenteers ran out of ammunition.
A grand total of 67% of the army perished in this advancement. A further 14% surrendered and of those, 1% died in prison from disease or starvation. 1,531 men in total lost their lives.
As for the boats, of the ones that made it to Veritas, none of the large ships survived, 4 of the medium ships made it back (2 were captured, 9 sank) and 29 of the small ships made it back (38 sunk, 8 captured). Of the 18 rowboats that were on the beach during the initial beach attack, 15 landed on the peninsula, with the other three rowing all the way to Pommedora.
Those that escaped ended up on all manner of islands in the surrounding area. One boat drifted with only one man on board for 8 days. He too survived off of horseflesh but also was lucky enough to get rainwater.
The other half of Veritas’s army had taken a longer route to Ardenholm. Ardenholm somehow managed to pull off an astonishing victory, despite being outnumbered 5-1. They were helped by the crew that had mutinied initially. They made use of their thick walls and used a turtle strategy to wait for help, until after 24 hours when they realized that something had gone seriously wrong, when they then went on a sudden offensive, catching the Veritasian army completely by surprise because they had grown used to not being shot at.
The Ardenholm fighters used bows and a ridiculously large pile of arrows to shoot at the invaders non-stop until they finally gave up and went home. They were significantly hampered by not having the other half of their army. Both sides suffered relatively minor casualties, with Ardenholm losing 19 men and Veritas losing exactly 100.
Veritas lost 48 of their 120 tridenters, with the vast majority being lost by flying too close to the boats and being shot with arrows. Their armor suffered a loss total of 329.
This defeat left the rebels in shock. Their entire standing army had been effectively wiped out. They would start having to recruit younger men and paying more for mercenaries.
The Tuberists had taken the highest casualty rate, with an unimaginable 80% casualty rate and 16% captured. Only 4%, or just 16 men on one small boat, managed to make it back. When the elder potatoes learned about this, they were understandably shocked and devastated and justifiably withdrew all future support. They claimed that the Tuberites had been used as cannon fodder and that that was an stupidly high casualty rate for a defensive mission. They had lost every single one of their ranking officers they had sent on that mission and demanded insanely high rates of compensation. It wasn’t until the battle was thoroughly explained and they were promised that all the islands would convert to Tuberism that they agreed to help once more.
The defeat would likely turn the tide in Veritas’s favor unless the rebels had an ace up their sleeves…
And that is the story of one of the worst strategical blunders in Stoneworks history.
This story is based around the truth. Ardenholm was indeed attacked by Veritas and BB after rebelling with Pommedora and Humilau. The Tuberists did indeed help out for religious reasons. There was indeed a failed charge counterattack which was poorly planned and the casualty numbers are accurate if you combine the dead and captured and just consider them all dead. The Veritasians did indeed use tridents to pick most of us off, and I myself died. This would have easily cost us the battle as we lost 80% of our total gear and didn’t really have enough time to make a proper repot. We used the good old 0-armor-stone-axe-rush strategy and only won because they placed capture points underwater which is illegal. So yeah the next battle is in a week (I think) and we have a LOT of grinding to do haha.
Also Stoney hmu if you ever want any scriptwriting help. I love to do this.
If you read this far um gg I guess
- lnedible

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Hey everyone.
Me and my friends are new-ish to Street Fighter. We mucked about on 4 q little ago, but going all in on 6. We are having a blast but I'm getting bodied much more frequently. I'm playing Honda with a Fightstick, and it's my first time with a Charge Character. I tried Alex in 5 but when I saw the Charge I avoided him. I love Honda's design too much to ignore, and the only other Character that I would play is Blanka, who also charges.
So I'm qt about a 20-15% win rate with Honda. My friends Guile/Gief I haven't won even a round against after 30 games. My Manon/Cammy I'm about 14 wins over 50. And my Juri/Marisa maybe 1 over 10 games.
I'm struggling with Charging mainly. Most times I input the forward for headbutt I'll end up jumping and attacking leaving me SUPER open to a Drive Impact or Airgrab. Mentally I'm only thinking about Charging. Trying to track how long until I'm charged, what move I wanna use, etc. And usually it ends up I'm so focused on that I don't react in time to pokes/overheads/grabs. I REALLY struggle on Charging in combos. I've only really relied on Headbutt/Slam punishes and the LP-MP-Hand Slaps combos. I can almost never get the Level 2 backCharge-forward-back-foreward because I sometimes end up jumping diagonally stressing to get it out asap.
Mainly looking for tips on how you've played with Honda, how you've become accustomed to Charging, and if maybe I'm just not suited for it and should look at a Non-Charge Character.

Seriously confused with camper shang. His back attack throw you so far back so the only way to approach him is by hopping forward, but when you do that his animation already done and he will slammed you.
I was using sarge and i cant even hit him once with my attack, it literally turns into a wrestling match. We were on equal ground, but at the last round i was incredibly pissed that he play passive so i started hopping and jump forward. i got hit with back attack+slammed multiple times and dies. Can somebody please tell me how to beat that?

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“My Dad is my hero.”
Harry Connick, Jr.
The Daughter that Follows
Chapter 27
Reunited
Part 3
Anna’s barriers flared to life and she felt Hong Long try to push through.
“No, we don't want to scare them any worse than they are.” Anna said telepathically as she felt the creature’s jaws begin to squeeze down on her barriers.
She felt Hong Long strain against her will then finally push through and form in front of her. The dragon roared and slammed into the beast, coiling and restraining the struggling creature. Then it looked in the direction of Alan. Anna followed her tulpa’s gaze.
Alan Quain was casually holding the moth of the Indominous Rex shut, the creature was now forcefully crouched and clearly in a submissive stance. He was patting its side and soothing it with comforting words and a telepathic reassurance. He looked over at Anna briefly and nodded to the other one which was currently trying to bite into Hong Long, which was proving fruitless as the tulpa’s skin was near impenetrable to a mundane creature. Anna, however, was getting the feeling of bites all over her body.
She sighed and walked over to the dinosaur, near enough to its snapping jaws, but more than just out of range. She focused and soon she was in it’s mind. He was a furious and aggressive creature, made even more aggressive by a lifetime of shocks from batons and drugs from guns. She saw his only solace was his sister who was now being casually restrained by something it saw as food. Anna reached out mentally and hugged the creature in its mind. To the dinosaur’s perspective though it was now very tiny compared to Anna’s mental form. She tried her best to comfort it, but it was continually lashing out. Soon though, her father joined her and pulled her away. The dinosaur soon fell into a deep sleep.
“They’ll have to be quarantined in the old Bio-Syn sanctuary, but we don’t have to end them.” Alan said. “This one is going to be a problem unless he’s asleep though.”
“People suck.” Anna sniffled.
Alan nodded. “We can, but we can also...”
“Be better.” Anna nodded. “Kratos wasn’t a subtle teacher.”
Alan laughed, “You’d be surprised.”
“So what now?” Anna asked.
“I contacted Billy, they’ll be here for pickup in the morning. Then they go to the sanctuary and we go back to the camp for a bit. Until then I’ll keep him in a deep sleep, his sister won’t be too much of an issue, she’s calmer, but she’s gonna need to eat.” Alan said as he looked to Hong Long, “Think you can help out there?”
Hong Long snorted and nodded, then looked at Anna.
Anna smiled and nodded. “Thank you.”
Hong Long made a series of mumbles and nudged Anna’s head.
“Go get her something good to eat. Like a big crocodile or something.” Anna smiled and patted him on the head.
The tulpa dragon flew off.
Alan made camp and Anna helped. By the time they had finished Hong Long had returned and put an overly large snake by the Rex’s mouth.
“Well that’s a fucking huge anaconda.” Alan sighed as purple flashed around the area of their camp.
“Something we should worry about?” Anna asked.
Alan shrugged. “Potentially, there are realities where anacondas just get absurdly large and eat people.”
Anna’s eyes went wide.
“I doubt this is one of those worlds, but for all I know someone de-extincted the Titanboa.” Alan huffed and added, “Again.”
“Again?!” Anna almost shrieked.
“I thought you loved all animals.” Alan laughed.
“I do, but who keeps making these clones and why?” Anna stomped her foot on the ground as Hong Long shrunk down and coiled over her shoulder.
“Rich assholes wanting to make more money by selling a ‘perfect weapon’.” Alan sighed. “Story doesn’t change much honestly. Psionic soldier. Cloned dinosaur. Engineered Dinosaur. Ancient Snake. They always want to exploit something, there’s always a Looten Plunder.”
“Okay, was that a name?” Anna asked.
“Ah, you didn’t get to meet The Planeteers, that’s right.” Alan sighed and shook his head. “We’ll go find a world of theirs, you’d get along with all of them. But yeah it's the name of an asshole whose only goal is to exploit nature for money. Also hires a very lethal mercenary I tend to have to kill.”
“Yikes.” Anna said as she sat down and began to stroke Hong Long like a very long and reptilian cat.
“The Planteers were 5 kids recruited by a very literal spirit of the Earth, Gaia. They’re not soldiers and were never meant to be, their entire purpose is education and enlightenment. But they weren’t left defenseless. They each got a magic ring, four with the classic elements and the fifth is heart, which is kinda like telepathy but more here...” He tapped his chest. “If they really get pressed, which happens to them a lot because they're teens and they’re fighting psychotic, sometimes super villain adults, they can combine the powers to make...” He gestured in the air and the illusion of a blue skinned man with teal hair and red suit-like parts on his body appeared, “Captain Planet.”
“Nice mullet.” Anna snickered.
“He likes it.” Alan laughed. “He loves those kids, I try to remember that when I’m in their worlds.”
Anna nodded as she watched the image. “He has the heart of a hero.”
Alan laughed, “Filling those shoes already?”
“I think it’s because the other part of my base is already there.” Anna said. “I’m just waiting on you.”
“Well now we’re just waiting on each other.” Alan smirked. “Get some sleep. I got the watch. Need to keep the big boy asleep anyway.”
Anna nodded and walked into her tent, “Hong Long keep him some company for a bit please?”
Hong Long nodded coiled around Alan’s waist, waiting to be patted.
“Oh no, you don’t fool me.” Alan smiled as he pulled out some cards. “Come on, a game or two.”
Hong Long wrinkled his nose and snorted but coiled his lower body in such a way that it made a flat enough surface to play a game of cards.
Anna woke up to the sound of metal clanging against metal. Slowly she walked out of her tent and saw that her father was loading the male Indominous Rex into a holding sling. The female was actually sitting calmly in a holding crate, two large goat carcasses at her maw for her to eat whenever.
“Your dragon cheats.” Alan laughed as he locked the final column into place. “But he cheats poorly.”
“Why are you teaching my dragon card games?” Anna asked as she patted the dragon that once again coiled around her like a sash.
“He knows them, I just wanted a game or two.” Alan snorted.
Hong Long made some murmuring noises and grumbles that Anna understood as him being upset at being caught.
“Of course he caught you, he’s endlessly old.” Anna said with a minor jab to her father.
Alan smiled then realized what she had said as several work men laughed at the joke.
“My daughter, guys.” Alan sighed. “All right, let’s pack and get back to the camp and a warm shower!”
“Oh, warm showers.” Anna nodded. “And you can tell me about some other places we should visit.”
Alan smiled as he hugged his daughter. “I got a great one!” He laughed.
(T)(D)(T)(F)---(T)(F)(T)(W)
Another helicopter ride and a few time zones later the father and daughter were once again at the Montana based Camp Cretaceous. Alan had gotten the honor of the first shower in no small part due to a pachy skidding and covering him in mud and excrement through the fencing it had. Anna was glad that she had it last though, she got to enjoy the fresh hot water that she knew her dad had helped kick up.
It was well into the evening when they were sitting on his porch, looking out at the heads of the brachiosauruses swaying in the setting sun. Rio was even taking her time to watch them as well.
Alan was actually enjoying himself to a degree he hadn’t let himself in a very long time.
Anna was ecstatic, and enraptured by the gentle giants.
Rio’s recent turmoil and confusion seemed to have faded.
Then Alan sighed loudly and put his beer down on a table.
Anna focused and Rio did as well.
Hong Long coiled around Anna.
Rio stood and took a defensive stance.
From the high above the green aura of Psy-Ko descended, her enhanced powers made her glow like a beacon in the night. Besides her a suit of black metallic armor was descending as well.
“Hello Alan.” Psy-Ko smiled. “Anna.”
“Go die in a fire.” Anna growled.
“Is that anyway to greet--” Psy-Ko was cut off.
“Yes!” Alan shouted, “Yes it is how you great lunatics who hound and harass your family!”
An invisible force sent the armor that contained Sindri sailing into the sky.
“Well, I guess we’re fighting then!” Sindri roared as he rebounded back faster than anyone could react. His armor’s fist impacted a barrier that seemed to pop out of thin air. It was gleaming white and had odd symbols filling it.
“I’m sorry, I’m keeping them safe for a bit.” Ragnis grinned as he appeared. “Allow me to assert your place in the hierarchy of power.”
“Above him.” Psy-Ko grinned as green strands of hair stretched out and began to weave themselves into the various dinosaurs.
“Oh no you don’t!” Anna snarled as she formed a blade of her aura around her wrist and levitated herself up to the stands, cutting through all of them.
Alan just stared as his temper started to flare. “FLEISCH!” He roared.
The psionic woman smiled at the man she hated. “You remembered my name.”
“You’re boring.” Ragnis said as he looked down at the straining form of Sindri in his mech suit. “Now her..” Ragnis made a kicking motion and Sindri’s mech was swallowed by a beam of light and vanished.
Ragnis was then immediately at Psy-Ko’s side swinging a huge claymore down on her. Psy-Ko smiled as she dodged effortlessly. Soon she felt all the strands of her hair were cut free from their targets. Shr grinned again as she turned to Anna.
“My dear, why such worry? They’d be under better care with me.” Psy-Ko tried her best to give a sweet smile.
Anna stopped and turned to her.
“Anna!” Alan shouted. “She’s up to something.” He brought himself into the air and watched as Rio awas now engaging the returning form of Sindri. “This is some sort of trap!”
“Oh do be quiet Alan!” Psy-Ko sneered as tendrils of her hair raced and encased Alan Quain.
Anna roared as she surged forward. Ragnis joined her in the shout of rage. Psy-Ko moved effortlessly as she used her hair to snake into Anna’s aura and steal control of her arm from her. She directed it to the sword arm of the Scion of Life.
Ragnis shrieked in pain as his right arm was lopped off half way up his forearm. The limb fell as Anna watched in shock at what Psy-Ko had done. Psy-Ko laughed in joy as Sindri caught the limb and vanished. Then the hair that had encased Alan Quain detonated as if a bomb of pure power had gone off. It left Psy-Ko with only half of her hair left as she too shrieked in pain.
Psy-Ko floundered as she tried to focus once more. She was able to get just enough focus to see the rising form of Alan Quain, the purple mark of his psionic power that marked his eyes was now expanded out like with the edges splashed in black and white, like volcanoes of rage highlighting just how dangerous a force of nature he was becoming.
“Retreat Ragnis.” Alan said with an angry hiss.
Anna was still in shock. “Ragnis...”
“It’s alright kid.” Ragnis winced, “We both fell for it.” He vanished and left her to her confusion.
“I’m done pulling my punches with you.” Alan focused on Psy-Ko and the woman felt an intense pressure on her throat.
“No!” The high pitched and gleeful voice of Atropos said as she appeared and encased Psy-Ko in a wave of dark pulsing energy. “I think that will have to wait...” Then they vanished.
It took both Anna and Alan a few moments to establish that no major damage had been done, but there were now reports of UFOs fighting over dinosaurs. Which was going to definitely boost their tourism funding at the camp.
When they came down and went back inside Anna was crying into her pillow.
“Stupid question, but can I do anything?” Alan asked.
“I’m sorry, I should have listened.” Anna sniffled.
“She actually surprised me with that.” Alan said. “Hair powers. That’s quite a change.”
“Psychic hair powers.” Anna corrected him with a small laugh.
“That’s...” Alan blinked. “That’s just dumb and I know a woman who uses her normal hair in a similar way.”
“Will he be okay?” Anna asked.
Alan shrugged. “I mean according to them you took off half of the Wicked Bitch’s hand and she couldn’t fix that.”
Anna nodded. “I’m a danger to them.”
A flash outside their door and a knock later and Ragnis was opening the door and walking in. He was wearing a heavily metallic prosthetic.
“You could have waited for me to answer.” Alan said.
“You were going to let me in anyway.” Ragnis shrugged and showed off his hand. “No hard feelings, I got a new one.”
“Why does that look...” Anna stared at it. “Is that Vik’s work?”
“No, but it is from V’s reality.” Ragnis smiled. “Going to need some variants, but now that I have one that’s a part of me I can work with it.”
“But she has your hand.” Anna pointed out.
“Yeah, that’s concerning.” Ragnis nodded. “But don’t blame yourself, they clearly planned this. And we both had to fall for it.”
“I mean, I did say it was a trap.” Alan shrugged.
“Yeah but how did you know?” Anna asked.
“He is endlessly old.” Ragnis nodded.
Alan stared at the Scion.
“I already used that earlier.” Anna said.
“Daughters get a ‘being cute’ pass.” Alan growled.
“Look, I already told the others, I got this so don’t blame yourself.” Ragnis sighed. “She’s been a step ahead for so long.” Ragnis shook his head. “But I’m still keeping an eye on you. Let her meet the kids, get some rest, leave when you’re ready.”
Alan nodded. “Thanks.”
Rio stared at the Scion. “Will she target others?”
“Oh my god she’s trying to become Sarumon of Many Colors!” Anna gasped.
“Wonderful reference, but no it doesn’t work like that. At most that hand has a very small amount of what my concept of life is.” Ragnis shook his head. “Although now I have to have Perfection paint the image of her in a rainbow outfit just to annoy her.”
“Why would it annoy her?” Anna asked.
Ragnis sighed, “She’s Evil, not terribly original and quite frankly she should be easy to predict, but we keep missing something.”
“Her actual goal.” Alan sighed. “It’s been something so insane you can’t grasp.”
“Do you have any insight oh, old one?” Ragnis asked
Alan glared once again. “No, because again I’m not that desperately insane. Once this thing with Darkseid is over you got me for the seconds it takes to flatten her.”
“Or flatline her.” Anna added.
Alan and Ragnis both cast a concerned glance at Anna.
“She’s getting to me.” Anna sighed.
Rio stood up and sat next to Anna. “Would you like to pet my head again?”
Anna smiled and slowly patted Rio’s head.
“When in doubt, pet a friend.” Ragnis said, “You two relax, you’re safe. Even if the res of us aren’t.”
\\\\
First
Previous /// Next
SPOTIFY LIST!
////
S: (looks around) Well...
Perfection: What?
S: I know one of you wants to say it.
Perfection: Say what?
S: Spaceballs, Lord Helmet.
Perfection: But there wasn’t a jamming scene.
S: I keep forgetting your sense of humor.
Wraith: (Walks in wearing an oversized helmet) “So, Lone Starr, now you see that evil will always triumph because good is dumb.”
DM: (Walks in wearing the same helmet)
Perfection: Also I’m a fan of Yogurt.
S: I worry about my mind sometimes.

Hello everyone I am looking for long term gaming friends! I often play by myself and am hoping to change that.
Some games I play are ESO, Borderlands, Deep Rock Galactic, Starting Elden Ring, Fallout 76, Stardew, Dying Light 1 & 2, Tiny Tina's, I also have some of the Halo games as well. Always down for free games like Warframe also.
I play on PC.
I am looking for any respectful, chill players 18-40 located anywhere. I am a night owl so often awake late for my time. I am LGBTQ and 420 friendly.
Please let me know your age, location and a bit about yourself in the dm!

Hello everyone I am a gal looking for long term gaming friends! I often play by myself and am hoping to change that.
Some games I play are ESO, Borderlands, Deep Rock Galactic, Starting Elden Ring, Fallout 76, Stardew, Dying Light 1 & 2, Tiny Tina's, I also have most of the Halo games as well. Always down for free games like Warframe also.
I play on PC.
I am looking for any respectful, chill players 18-40 located anywhere. I am a night owl so often awake late for my time. I am LGBTQ and 420 friendly.
Please let me know your age, location and a bit about yourself in the dm!

First/Prev
​
The route they chose skirted the borders of Sovereign space. It cost them an extra two weeks of travel, but avoided contact.
The delay chafed at everyone except for the mercs. Their contracts offered nothing more for prizes, so for them it wasn't boredom but safety. They didn't have to worry about what happened when they reached their destination either, for that matter. They spent their time doing their jobs with neat, quiet efficiency, and helping to train the San.
The humans had gone through training, but their total education was three months of being self-taught from holos and six of formal schooling, and for many of the duties that only gave them the barest outline. Mogan needed engineers who could do more than simply consult the checklist, and mechanics who could tell what was wrong with a system from small sounds the way he could tell at the first strike when a node of flint was flawed and what to do with it.
To Logog's chagrin, he put his marines to practicing again with atlatl and sling, making sure their skills hadn't atrophied. It sharpened skills, but it also kept them from getting into trouble. Drunk sailors fight, Shett had told him, and bored sailors fight, and bored sailors also find surprisingly creative ways to get drunk.
Nonetheless, by the time they reached the planet of Goretia, the entire crew was bored and ready for a change of pace. Six weeks of doing nothing felt like a poor way to begin a career of story and excitement, but the more experienced warriors knew that this was the general trend of any campaign; long periods of boredom when one wishes for action, followed by short periods of action when one wishes for boredom.
Once they found the planet on their sensors, the crew scrambled into action. The eight boarding craft could hold one hundred men each, slightly more warriors than the San had. Instead, each held fifty men and fifty dogs.
Any pup was trained to not leave a mess in the hut, but with the ability to simply go outside denied to them the San had had to devise a latrine they could use. Beyond that, the dogs had been trained for hunting for generations, farther back than any of the San's songs could remember, ever since that day when the Unrevealed had decided to test humanity by choosing out the cleverest and kindest of the wolves to come to them in peace.
Nor were they strangers to war. The orders that could command them to flank or attack a deer could make them do the same to men, and they had proven their worth more than once on the battlefields of Noepe. They were even more effective here than they had been on Earth. Any other humans, including the Animal People, had dogs of their own, but the very idea of a beast obeying a sapient being was beyond them. The closest anyone had come to the idea was the secret sapient species, and they were only able to do so because they knew the Vishtali and the other two—the other three, now--were no animals.
Men and women had been trained and conditioned to clamber into the trees and fight other soldiers, or to stand under laser fire, or almost every circumstance but to be charged by dozens of wolf-like, snapping, snarling beasts. Not many could stand against that, and those that could had the dogs to protect the gunners and the gunners to protect the dogs. The dogs took more losses than the humans, but that was to be expected—and much as they loved the dogs, better to lose them than the people.
They generally had the run of the ship during the last few weeks, and one was as likely to see a dog fetching things or playing keep-away with a tool as curled up in the habs. They were even made to exercise as much as the humans.
At least it made the dogs less bored than the humans, and they seemed to have adapted to the routine better. They were still happy to do something different, however, and getting them onto the boarding craft turned out to be fairly easy.
Mogan knelt on the floor of one boarding craft himself, quiver on his back. The air on Goretia was breathable, and that was a blessing. He had a hatchet on his hip instead of his pistol, as did the rest of the warriors.
Alone among the warriors, he didn't have a dog. Knucklebones had been the best of dogs, and had died four years ago. Mogan had not gotten a new one, and he couldn't say whether it was because he had to some extent given up, or whether he couldn't summon the energy for something that wasn't for his daughter or for his tribe.
He had a dog now, one he had purchased from one of the others just after weaning and named Blueknife, as her eyes made him think of the knife he had made of blue-green obsidian for Hyeshi. He thought Hyeshi would approve of the name as well, and had to smile. He was going to be able to ask her himself, whatever it took.
But Blueknife had been born about six months ago, and that meant she was too small for combat. Next to him were three of the Vishtali, and they too had no dogs. In fact, they seemed to have a hard time getting used to the concept of having dogs everywhere. They carried modified shoshir and shields, but seemed to have no confidence in their ability with them.
Logog seemed to have none either, for they were away from the front with him. Mogan presumed he needed to be present to make the action official, and it would help in calming down their new wards, but Logog had absolutely balked at the idea of putting him in the front lines.
Were the Vishtali not there, he would have used the holo at his left hand to show where the craft were, but they were nervous enough already, and it was best he didn't add to the stress.
Burya sent a signal to Logog, who in turn signaled the pilot, and the boarding craft lifted and then eased out of the Semiramis. This one was the Knucklebones—Logog didn't feel comfortable with the craft unnamed, so they had spent a little time devising and painting them.
The signal meant they were on the far side of the planet, where it would be harder for their targets to detect them. Mogan could see nothing except the walls of the craft, but he knew that all eight were flying directly towards the planet, their goal to get close to ground quickly. The Semiramis itself would fly past, and then double back in time to pick up the craft on the way back.
Soon the craft began to tremble as it entered atmosphere and had to push itself through the air, and they slowed as they reached the ground and fanned out slightly, keeping low.
The flight was slower, and not as smooth as in the empty void, but all the same the vehicles could move far faster than anyone could on foot, and in a surprisingly short time they were settling into a clearing. In the front of the craft, a holo projected from the ceiling, showing the area as if from a distance.
“It's a short run to the mines from here. Higa, your unit will guard the Vishtali and hang back. We'll need you in there, but they'll still have their shoshir, and that'll be no bargain in tunnels. We won't build any confidence if we get their people killed. Barab, you and the Second are the flint, Third is the bone.”
It was a simple enough analogy, hopefully enough that anybody not of the San who heard it would get confused. In days gone by, the tribe had made their spearpoints out of flint, creating razor-sharp blades that could easily pierce through the thick hides of their prey. But flint was fragile, and anything from a missed cast onto a stone or hard tree to an accurate cast that hit bone could cause it to shatter.
Long ago, the people that would thousands of years later be called Magdalenian devised a better way. Tiny blade blanks were made, some not as long as the thickness of his thumb, and the ends pressed away to create bladelets, most shorter than the width of a pinky nail. These were carefully glued into slots cut into a weapon. For a spear, these were usually points of bone with at least six, sometimes up to three times that, in bladelets.
A single spear created more cutting edges, and if one broke it was a simple matter to work it out and fit a new one in—and since they were smaller, they were less likely to break. The new technology was an improvement in every way.... up until they reached the stars and it was made pretty much obsolete. That was still difficult for Mogan to deal with.
It also made for an oddity that his handiwork was in evidence today. Some still had the old-fashioned spears, from more than two years ago back on Earth. Others had spears that he had designed and had manufactured, thousands of the exact same dimensions and weight, tipped with titanium-gold blades.
Mogan had devised other spears and spearheads as well—flash-bangs, spears with small explosives that would sink into whatever they hit and then riddle it with shrapnel, spears that would leave a small tracking device in the target, and of course the application of high explosives. It was difficult to go wrong with the application of high explosives.
Except here. Magnetic activity in the mine tunnels meant that any such devices were likely to go off at the right time, and the fact that there were tunnels in the first place meant that there were few if any actual right times for an explosive to go off.
That activity was the real reason there were Vishtali in the first place. They didn't have any particular history or skill as miners, but even well-protected drones would be rendered useless in minutes. Instead, they were reduced to using pneumatic drills to chip away at the rock. For the San, this was a technique thousands of years in the future, but for anybody else among the stars it was terrifyingly barbaric.
Mogan had hoped he could raid the spoils of the mines as well, but their information indicated he'd have no such luck. The mine was rich enough; the kh'ler crystals within were gemstones of extraordinary quality and value, such that particularly large and fine specimens had been used to rent planets from the Sovereign. Unfortunately, they were rarely, if ever, simply found in the mine.
Instead, the Vishtali mucked out tons of stone pried loose by hand-tools and pneumatic machines—even small explosives might shatter the crystals—and pushed heavy carts to the surface, where it was loaded onto ships. A facility off-world was easily able to locate the crystals and extract them from the stone, and to help hide the origins as well.
He would have to settle for killing all the overseers and guards, stealing anything of value, and freeing their slaves. Mogan believed it would suffice.

Just a bit of a rant to get this all off my chest. Last period (47) was in early January. Since then my grandmother passed, early morning the day after my birthday. My parents have (continually) threatened to sue me and my brother over our inheritence. My landlords informed me the next month that they were selling the property I have lived at for 17 years (offered to sell to me before putting on the market). Bf and I kinda knew this was coming for a few years and have been saving like crazy. Gma's generosity rounded out what we needed for down-payment. But this also means we are buying our own home AND the attached rental. Never been a landlord.
Six years ago bf fell ill and ended up paraplegic and had complications that kinda make him less than helpful in this whole endeavor. And his daily care (so lucky to have his mum to help out!) I looked at single homes (no rental) in our price range but nothing was ADA enough for move in so we decided to stay and I guess I'm gonna learn to be a landlord. We maybe close in another week.
The current renters "sneaked" in two dogs, one of which is a pit mix. So every spare moment the last two weeks I spent trying to find insurance that would take us and allow the dog. Not to mention gathering both mine and bf ppw for loan...taking off work for inspections, doing spring clean and spring yard work from dusk to dawn alone every weekend..and feeling super guilty that my long haired tiny dog and cat haven't gotten their summer hair cuts yet...
I'm so exhausted. I just want this house thing to be over and the weather to hit 110* so I can just have an excuse to spend a weekend on the sofa cuddled with my fur babies watching true crime or just staring at a wall dreaming of going to Tanzania. I can't afford a vacation away bc house now, but I also haven't had a real one of those in like 6 years.
Haven't had time to go to the doc in years...and was trying to decide between roof shingle options this morning (sellers are replacing roofs) and was like..."am I having a heart attack? Or just being super dramatic rn?"
Blah...Wah...sorry for the rant. I'm done. Thank you for reading. Lol.

Money in the Bank 2023
In London, Seth Rollins defends the WHC agains Finn Bálor in a banger of a match, and retains the title in the end. After the match, JD attack Rollins until Drew McIntyre comes out and fights off the heels. But, in a shocking turn of events, McIntyre claymores Rollins and holds up the WHC.
Summerslam 2023
Drew McIntyre vs Finn Bálor vs Seth Rollins(c): World Heavyweight Championship
Drew McIntyre explains that he’s been under appreciated for far too long. He carried this company through a pandemic yet he doesn’t get the appreciation that he deserves. McIntyre says that he’s done doing a damn thing for the fans and that he’s going to get the moment that he’s “owed” any means necessary. Bálor has a bone to pick with Drew for attacking him and so does Rollins which leads to a huge triple threat at Summerslam.
This match at the biggest party of the summer is a classic. Bálor & Rollins for a temporary alliance to take down the psychopathic Scotsman but Drew is on the warpath for that moment he feels that he deserve. Rollins gets taken out at ringside which leaves Drew to hit a Claymore on Bálor but as he pins Bálor, Rollins hits a Curb Stomp on Drew and pins Bálor narrowly retaining the gold which enraged McIntyre who goes on a rampage at ringside.
Clash at the Castle 2023
Drew McIntyre vs Seth Rollins(c): World Heavyweight Championship
As you’d expect, this match is a certified banger. While Rollins does great as usual, McIntyre is on a whole different level. Rollins goes for a springboard knee but McIntyre catches him in mid-air with a Claymore but he doesn’t go for the pin, instead picking up Rollins and hitting a Future Shock DDT. One year after falling to Roman Reigns, Drew FINALLY gets his moment in front of the fans. Despite being a heel, McIntyre but still celebrates the W like an emotional babyface.
Crown Jewel 2023
*Drew McIntyre(c) vs Shinsuke Nakamura: World Heavyweight Championship
On Raw, Shinsuke Nakamura triumphs in a #1 contenders battle royal. Champion McIntyre, dismissing Nakamura as past his prime, attempts a Claymore sneak attack but Nakamura artfully dodges and counters with his own Claymore.
Understanding this might be his final shot at WWE glory, Nakamura gives everything in his duel with McIntyre. The match is a thrilling, hard-hitting spectacle with Nakamura nearly snatching the title. But McIntyre, resilient and fierce, lands a second Claymore, securing his victory. Post-match, McIntyre brutally traps Nakamura's head between the ring post and steps, aiming for a final Claymore. It's then when old rival and friend Sami Zayn confronts the champion.
Survivor Series 2023
Drew McIntyre(c) vs Sami Zayn: World Heavyweight Championship
We get McIntyre some real heat by going after one of the biggest babyfaces on the roster. When Sami makes his entrance, McIntyre attacks him from behind, bashing him into the ringpost busting him open. Despite doctors telling Zayn to forfeit the match, he refuses and fights valiantly and even nails a Helluva Kick nearly winning the title but the loss of blood wears Zayn down and he manages to nail him with a Claymore to retain the title once again.
Royal Rumble 2024
Drew McIntyre(c) vs Kevin Owens: Falls Count Anywhere for the World Heavyweight Championship
Kevin Owens is up next as he wants to avenge his fallen friend. Drew calls Kevin a hypocrite for after all these years standing up for Sami now. Owens took years off of Sami’s career reminding him of putting Sami on the shelf back in NXT. Kevin says that he wants to make things right, he’ll no longer put championships above those closest to him and instead he’ll win them for those he cares about. KO wants blood and he challenges Drew to a Last Man Standing Match at Royal Rumble.
This match goes over 20 minutes and it is a brutal affair. We see all types of weapons including a reverse Alabama slam from McIntyre through the announce table. But that’s not enough to put KO away, and he starts taking the fight right back to McIntyre. KO hits a powerbomb on Drew in the stage area and he does the unthinkable. He climbs the tron and goes for a massive frog splash off the tron but Drew manages to move out of the way in just the nick of time. Drew McIntyre narrowly retains the World Heavyweight Championship.
Elsewhere on the card, Gunther does what he failed to do last year and he manages to win the 2024 Royal Rumble from the #1 spot.
Elimination Chamber 2023
Men’s Elimination Chamber Match
Drew McIntyre steps into the Elimination Chamber first, defending his title amidst steel and danger. He battles past Seth Rollins, Finn Bálor, Shinsuke Nakamura, and Damien Priest, one after another. The final hurdle, Ricochet, pushes McIntyre to the brink, almost clinching an upset. Despite his successful defense, exhaustion begins to show on McIntyre's face showing more cracks in the armor.
WrestleMania 40
Drew McIntyre(c) vs Gunther(c): Intercontinental & World Heavyweight Championship
Over the past six months, Drew McIntyre, Raw's reigning terror, begins to show signs of wear. His sternest test lies ahead - Intercontinental Champion, Gunther. Sheamus steps into Raw, intent on realigning Drew's compass. He admonishes Drew, reminding him of his blind ambition turning him monstrous, mirroring Sheamus's own past where his ruthless drive for recognition cost careers and left him just another face in the crowd. These words resonate, sparking a change in McIntyre as he transitions towards becoming a face and gears up for his colossal defense against “The Ring General.”
The two main event Night One of WM 40. Gunther & McIntyre have a huge hard hitting match. They light the hell out of each other with chops. But at the end, Gunther proves too much for true hitting a Last Symphony from the top rope to win his first World Championship in WWE.

Hi, I am trying to clear out some miscellaneous volumes I no longer need! I've added several volumes that weren't in my last post.
Prices don't include shipping, but after $50, I'll take $5 off shipping. Please feel free to make offers, especially if you are bundling many volumes! Thank you!
Timestamp: https://imgur.com/a/8PU1fiL I tried my best to photograph any noticeable defects.
Additional photos for the books that are horizontal in the current timestamp photo (from a previous post): https://imgur.com/a/XnEwqnU

Volume	Price	Condition	Condition Notes
5 Centimeters Per Second	$7.50	G3
Adachi and Shimamura Manga 1	$6.00	G4	Crease on front cover, scratch on back cover
After the Rain 1	$6.00	G3
Animal Crossing: New Horizons 1-3	$14.00	G4
Bakemonogatari, Part 2 : Monster Tale	Free	G1	Severe water damage
Bakemonogatari, Part 3 : Monster Tale	Free	G1	Water damage
Barakamon 18+1	$8.00	G4	Imperfect cover
Chio’s School Road 1	$4.00	G2	Spine impact damage
Flying Witch 1	$5.00	G3
Gakuen Polizi 1	$5.00	G3	Yellowing, sticker on back
Hakumei and Mikochi: Tiny Little Life in the Woods 8	$8.00	G4
Hanamonogatari	$5.00	G3
Horimiya 1	$6.00	G4	Back cover has slight crease, wouldn't show up in photo
Horimiya 12	$6.00	G5
Horimiya 13	$6.00	G4	Front cover has slight crease
I've Been Killing Slimes for 300 Years and Maxed Out My Level 1	$5.50	G4
Inukami! Omnibus 2	$7.00	G3
Koizumi Loves Ramen Noodles 1	$5.50	G4
Kubo Won't Let Me Be Invisible 3	$6.00	G4	Dent on back cover
Laid-Back Camp 1	$6.50	G4
Laid-Back Camp 1	$6.50	G4
Laid-Back Camp 4	$7.00	G5
Mamotte Shugogetten 2	$6.50	G4
Mamotte Shugogetten 4	$5.00	G4
My Youth Romantic Comedy Is Wrong, as I Expected 7.5	$7.50	G4	Spine tear
Otorimonogatari	$5.00	G3
Pokémon Adventures Collector's Edition 2	$8.00	G4	Back cover creased
Prince Freya 1	$5.50	G4
Ran and the Gray World 7	$6.00	G3	Front cover creased
Shikimori's Not Just a Cutie 1	$6.50	G4
Suspension: Kubitsuri High School	$6.00	G3
The Way of the Househusband 5	$6.50	G4	Scratch on back cover
Toilet-bound Hanako-kun 1	$6.00	G4
W Juliet 1-3	$15.00	G3
Attack on Titan 25 & 26, My Hero Academia 11 & 21, One-Punch Man 16	$4.50 ea or $20 for all 5	G3-G4​

NOTE: This is a very long post. There’s a tl;dr summary at the bottom
Background:
This is coming from a long-time lurker, first time poster, and an Evil Dead fan for decades. For background, I have previous game dev experience, including Unity and Unreal, so I’m (mostly) not talking out my ass, and I've played both sides of this game roughly equally for more hours than I’d care to admit (primarily solo q, sometimes survivor with friends, and otherwise just playing demon when survivor queue times are high, as they have been many times since release). Usually, I just play whichever side has the lowest queue time.
Despite its flaws, this has been one of my favorite games of all time. The original development team was clearly passionate about the Evil Dead. The art, audio, and overall atmosphere are excellent and have superb attention to detail. I love all the random chatter from my survivor, the feeling of rushing through the woods as the Kandarian demon, and the intensity of a close game regardless of who wins. However, most of us would agree that this game has been held back by very poor "balancing" patches since release, as evidenced by polls on this subreddit confirming it is indeed the most frustrating problem.
We've endured shemps duping, brokenly OP characters, fear looping, and many other game-breaking exploits throughout. Bugs can be tolerable and are even to be expected, but the "fixes" almost always cause new issues and take far too long. It is painfully obvious that there has been very little time or effort expended on these issues by the post-release support team. Some patches have been so bad that they shouldn’t even make it to QA, let alone production – I’d be ashamed, esp. given that some of these issues can be fully and precisely patched in a few lines of code. I don’t need to see the source code to know that – even a rat’s nest of blueprints and disorganized C++ code can’t justify it.
I can only hope the skeleton crew that's continuing support for this game will take a few hours to address these issues. More importantly, I hope someone higher-up will recognize that this game still has millions of copies floating around and a lot more opportunities for profit, so it’s worth it to invest just a little time/thought into balance to keep new players and veterans happy. Frankly, each issue could be hammered out in minutes by someone familiar with the codebase, but I know it takes some time for building and testing across multiple platforms - days is fine, weeks/months is insane, esp. given the current state of the game.
I think it is important to first precisely define how the game is unbalanced, and how this imbalance can ruin the fun of many matches. Based on previous posts and my own personal experiences playing with friends and family at various skill levels, the following pattern becomes clear:
3+ Bad/Low-Level Survivors – Essentially 99% Demon Win
2+ Bad Survivors, All Others Decent to Excellent – Heavily demon-sided (~90% Demon Win)
1+ Bad Survivor, All Others Decent to Excellent – Somewhat demon-sided (~70% Demon Win)
All Survivors Decent, Not Very Cooperative/Sharing – About Equal (~50/50 on Win)
All Survivors Decent, Mostly Cooperative – Somewhat survivors-sided (~70% Survivor Win)
All Survivors with Good Skills/Teamwork/Knowledge – Heavily survivors-sided (~90% Survivor Win)
All Survivors with Excellent Skills/Teamwork/Knowledge – Essentially 99% Survivors Win
Note: Skills/teamwork/knowledge are not necessarily related to prestige level nor gameplay style, though usually survivors with prestige levels have stuck with the game long enough to at least be “decent” (even if they’re still not perfectly cooperative/sharing/etc.). This pattern is only somewhat altered by the demon’s skill level – new/low-level demons skew much more to higher survivor win rates in every scenario, and excellent high-level/prestige demons playing the current “meta” demon skew toward higher demon win rates. Any level 45+ demon that’s decent to good and usually plays non-meta demons like the current versions of Warlord or Necro (that’s me) will likely not skew these results.
I believe my personal experience is a microcosm of the overall balancing issue, and we’ve seen posts on this subreddit that consistently confirm the above pattern. It should be painfully obvious by now to anyone who’s played both sides long enough, and it should also be even more painfully obvious to any developers/publishers pouring over analytics data for the game. What adds insult to injury is that, at the more extreme ends of the pattern, a lot of toxicity emerges. Many survivors go into flashlight-clicky mode when they have the upper hand, and many demons retaliate by dancing with possessions over corpses or other means, whether it’s in the current match or against some innocent victims in the next match (I’ve sometimes been guilty too – I usually just take a break when toxic matches get to me and I turn toxic, but I’m truly sorry to anyone who’s had to deal with any of this crap from me)
Anyway, what will happen if the above pattern continues over time? Well, newer players who are consistently getting absolutely destroyed and possibly taunted at the same time (as either survivor or demon) will either (a) quit the game, or (b) get better. Now, run through that scenario while looking at the pattern and assume the game remains roughly in the current state. There will be more and more new/”bad” survivors quitting the game entirely, and a smaller portion that will only stick with the game if they level up and “git gud” over many hours (becoming good to excellent players). The same thing will happen to demon players. What happens when all we have left are good to excellent survivors and good to excellent demons? Well, check the chart again. Every match will be at least heavily survivor-sided if not a guaranteed win. Survivors get bored, even most masochistic veteran demon players give up, queue times for survivors reach new heights, and the game “dies.” This sequence of events has happened at various times in the game’s lifecycle, but I fear it’s headed toward extremes that will eventually make the game unplayable.
Obviously, it’s no fun to win virtually every time and it’s no fun to lose almost every time. Competitive games are most fun when you have close matches – ideally, there’d be a win rate of about 50% for either side. “But wait,” you say, “the pattern above indicates that there already IS a roughly 50/50 balance for that scenario!” And yes, that’s true. But how many matches are actually like that? How many matches have you personally played that felt close and competitive the whole time? It certainly wasn’t common when we had strong SBMM, and it isn’t common without SBMM either. Why? Because players who stick with the absolutely brutal intro to this game today are almost guaranteed to at least become good/high-level players with solid game mechanics/knowledge (though some will still become toxic/uncooperative teammates or toxic demons). Those who don’t become competent players are virtually guaranteed to quit in frustration, some after just the first several matches where they are either getting consistently annihilated by all the veterans, or clearly being “allowed” to win if the other side takes pity. In essence, the game is just plain brutal for HOURS on end for newer players and can become stale for solid veteran players. For veterans, we have survivors who team up with 3 other veterans (boring due to easy wins, low challenge), demons who can only win by repetitively attacking an inanimate stationary book (boring due to minimal ability to challenge survivors throughout match), or demons who see 2+ bad survivors and have to decide whether to let them win or immediately stomp them to move on (both of which can be boring due to low challenge, and frankly feel bad if harassing beginners). I absolutely LOVE any close matches, win or lose, but they are unfortunately exceptionally rare.
Clearly, the goal of balancing patches should be to make as many matches as close as possible. How? Well, it’s very simple – give beginners a chance and give veterans a challenge. Specifically, force or incentivize gameplay that elevates beginners, challenges veterans, prevents toxicity, and basically “evens the playing field” so that the chart above reads more like “20% through 80%” win rates for survivors rather than 1% through 99%. Thus, the fixes below mostly take aim at mechanics that are abused by veterans of the game or seek to better prepare beginners. Additionally, nearly each of the fixes below can be implemented with the equivalent of just a few lines of code.
I fully believe that this game can achieve a decent balance as a 4v1 asymm. It only seems impossible because the patches for balancing have often failed to address root causes and/or caused new issues. The game can be more welcoming for newcomers (both survivors and demons alike) while still having a lot of the same learning curves and leveling systems to reward higher level play without it becoming outright oppressive to either side.
Anyway, based on a lot of previous posts and my own observations, here are some easy fixes for the next patch:
1. Revert demon traps to their previous behavior (i.e. make it so possessed survivors can be walked into a trap) and fix the fear looping mechanic for SchemeBaal specifically
The latest "fix" for this had a workaround from the community within hours to fear loop survivors anyway and nerfed all other demons for no reason.
This can be easily resolved by reverting to the previous code/blueprints/whatever (or hell, going back to the previous build if necessary), and then implementing a simple solution for Schemer. This solution requires a scalpel, not a sledgehammer, so it should apply ONLY to Schemer. I can think of two easy possibilities, either of which would only need a few lines of code.
First possibility: If a survivor has set off a trap that was set by using the Schemer's special ability, then that trap now has a normal cool down and cannot be "reset" again by Schemer's current use of the special ability. This would allow Schemer to set a trap manually, possess a survivor, run them into it, get the trap reset immediately by their special ability, but then only run the survivor into the same trap a 2nd time. Thus, Schemer would still be the demon associated with traps and fear, but wouldn't be able to loop a survivor in one spot endlessly. A survivor that's slightly separated wouldn't necessarily immediately die, but a demon could still down a lone wolf by harassing, lowering health, raising fear, and then doing this method.
Second possibility: The trap setting special ability of Schemer could be disabled when Schemer possesses a survivor. This may nerf Schemer specifically a tad bit too heavily, but is still a far better fix than what we've got. It's also super easy to program with something like the following pseudocode:
If (demon.ability == true && demon.name == "Schemer" && demon.possessing == true)
demon.ability = false;
2. Implement a stamina cost for vaulting windows/railings (e.g. the stamina cost could be the same as dodging)
This helps keep gameplay fair for both sides. It's clearly unfair and unfun to have a demon that can easily fear loop a survivor to death even if their teammates aren't far away, and the same holds true for a survivor that can "loop" a demon and never die. Survivors can still use objects, dodges, and other means to postpone death if they're alone (as I've done myself and seen done as demon) but it's at least possible for a demon to get in an occasional hit and whittle down health (i.e. it cannot be done indefinitely, at least if vaulting also uses stamina). Alternatively, at least give demons the ability to vault all the same objects as survivors, such as railings, so a 1v1 chase is fair – it just doesn’t feel great when a survivor jumps over a porch railing and looks back to flashlight click your possessed unit, knowing that there’s somehow zero threat in this 1v1 encounter in a 4v1 game due to a simple exploit. Personally, I think just adding a stamina cost would be fine to try at least, and many others in this community seem to agree. Plus, it should again only be a few lines of code to adjust the stamina bavariable of a survivor whenever he/she vaults.
3. Edit the text for the "hints" when a match is loading. There are absolutely no CLEAR tips about giving the right resources to the right players, nor hints about any newer demons (i.e. the hints have never been updated)
Regardless of which side we've played, we all know solo q for survivors is a total crap shoot. None of us started playing this game knowing that we should be gathering supplies for ourselves AND our teammates, dropping shemps for support, dropping ammo for hunters, etc. Many players quit before learning these things and there is no in game explanation for them (besides one single vague tip I can remember about how you can share resources with teammates, but no clear indication of sharing based on class).
I think the lack of instructions for basic team play is one of the major causes of low player retention for the game. The tutorials are helpful for basic controls, but there needs be a lot more emphasis on the basics of this game that many of us on this subreddit take for granted.
I’d start by making sure the following tip text is the first to be shown to all players for a few matches after this is patched in:
“Stay close to your teammates and focus on the current objective to survive. Going off to loot alone is very dangerous”
(yes, veteran players can often get away with this, but man, it feels terrible playing on either side and watching someone just wander off to loot the whole game)
The other tips could be a lot more direct:
“Players should stay within the blue aura of leaders whenever possible to get additional buffs”
“Warriors should generally be given the best melee weapons but do little ranged damage”
“Hunters should generally be given the best ranged weapons but do little melee damage. Drop ammo for them if they ask”
“Support players are generally weakest, but can heal or shield all their teammates by using shemps and amulets near them. Drop spare shemps for support”
Now, the above “tip texts” at the loading menu are super quick and easy to add to the game. However, if the developers would like to go a little above and beyond, it would be amazing to add some additional text boxes within the game to warn players about bad choices. For example, there could be blinking text in the center bottom half of the screen for awhile if you’re carrying another survivor’s specialty weapon and they don’t have one (or if yours is a higher rarity). Also, there could be similar warning text that you’ve wondered more than, say, 100m from your team. Again, just trying to give simple, clear instructions to beginners (and those that are somehow still selfishly playing after reaching level 25+). And yeah, there are always arguments and exceptions to be made about how to play optimally, but some updated/clear tips could go a long way.
4. Implement a bonus XP on the results screen after a match is over that gives each side a bonus based on how many points the other side gained. Also, fix demon leveling based on survivodemon level
This one sounds a little weird and complicated, but it's really not. What I'm saying here is that veteran survivors should be rewarded for taking it easy on a baby demon, and a veteran demon should be rewarded for taking it easy on baby survivors.
Basically, regardless of which side you play or if you win or lose, I believe you should get a bonus XP based on how the other side did. For example, let's say you're a veteran pup player that gets matched to novice survivors and down them all with a power possessed basic before they even get the first map piece. In this case, those survivors will have very little points after the match (maybe even under 1000 per person) and the demon should get no bonus reward. The survivors here should at least get a bonus for enduring the slaughter and staying in the match. Let's say the demon takes it easy on them though, let's them progress, maybe even just throws AI at them (hell, I've personally spawned a boss and walked them to good crates when they're clearly new and can barely take on bots). Let's say they get 10k points per player this way - the demon now gets bonus XP for good behavior.
I'd say that there should be a bonus XP for each player if the other side reaches a certain point threshold, say 30k, or if the survivors are wiped before first objective (as in, survivors get a bonus for enduring such a match and demon gets no bonus). This would help discourage immediately stomping new players and help retain them (remember everyone, this game will die if it's just a few hardcore people with long queue times all doing cheesy strats and stomping anyone who dares try joining as a newbie).
Anyway, in psuedocode, something like this could work:
If (survivor.totalscore >= 30000)
demon.bonusxp = 3000;
If (demon.totalscore >= 30000)
survivor.bonusxp = 3000;
[Loop thru survivors to apply bonus to each - obviously, these values can be tweaked]
Obviously, you may have survivors or demons who go AFK and then it may make it impossible for the other side to get a bonus. Therefore, there could also be some basic code for checking if someone is AFK (i.e. hasn’t not moved more than a certain small distance in a decent amount of time, hasn’t set a trap or possessed anything in a certain time, etc.). Frankly, I have no idea how we still don’t have AFK checks – just about any other online game I’ve ever played automatically disconnects you if you’re not playing.
As a bonus idea to this bonus idea, you could also cancel ALL XP points for a player for a round in which he/she is toxic, such as a check for repetitive flashlight clicking. I find this irritating whether I'm a survivor or a demon (and I def didn't deserve a bunch of XP the few times I've been guilty of it when I felt a demon was being toxic). I don't think there's an easy way to detect all toxic demon behavior with code, but it would be trivial to keep track of flashlight clicking in code. Maybe if a demon is "hovering" (dancing) directly over a dead body too long with a possessed unit or survivor, then they also have their XP completely canceled for the round - that would also be easy to check via code. The key to promoting good, non-toxic behavior would be to implement these checks without specifying precisely how many flashlight clicks count or how long dancing over a corpse counts – just note that specific toxic behavior will result in zero XP for the round for the offender and automate it in code.
Finally, as another incentive for fair play, the leveling up of demons should be dependent on the level of the survivors they are harassing AND on the demon’s current skill tree level. In other words, there should be modifiers so that new, low-level demons get leveled up more by the same actions as high-level demons, such as downing a player, and there should also be modifiers so that high-level demons cannot get leveled up as much by harassing low-level survivors, such as constantly downing a newbie, but can get slightly more leveled up by downing a high-level survivor. This goes back to the idea of elevating beginners and challenging veterans, esp. since it’s incredibly frustrating to be constantly singled out as a brand-new survivor. This could be something like:
Demon:
Lvl 1-24: x1.5 for demon leveling up
Lvl 25-44: x1.3 for demon leveling up
Lvl 45: x1.1 for demon leveling up
P1+: x1.0 for demon leveling up
Survivor (being attacked, hitting traps, or otherwise affected by demon):
Lvl 1-24: x0.5 for demon leveling up
Lvl 25: x1.0 for demon leveling up
P1+: x1.1 for demon leveling up
Specific examples:
Lvl 10 demon somehow downs a P3 survivor – demon levels up 1.5 x 1.1 = 1.65 times as much as now
Lvl 45 demon downs a Lvl 4 survivor – demon only levels up 1.1 x 0.5 = 0.55 times as much as now
P5 demon downs a P5 survivor – demon levels up 1.0 x 1.1 = 1.1 times as much as now
5. Disable the ability to start both the dagger and pages objectives at the same time
This "split cap" method is usually only used by high-level teams and can be almost impossible to counter by anyone who isn't a very experienced demon, at least on certain maps or when these objectives are at certain locations. I've managed to counter it myself most of the time as demon, but it can be very hard to deal with, esp. given that survivors are resurrected after either objective finishes. Depending on the map and RNG (esp. light sources at objectives and other variables), it can be impossible to counter.
Basically, if the timer is running on either objective, it should be impossible to start the other objective. This still allows creative play by high-level coordinated teams (e.g. maybe Pablo hides at the next objective waiting to kick it off immediately while waiting for others to race there by car). It also feels a lot more fair, particularly to less experienced demons.
Again, this could be fixed in just a couple lines of code. Literally, just check if a timer is running for daggepages and if so, don’t allow interaction with the other objective.
6. Add a call out in the in-game communication wheel to say "demon is on me” or “I need help” for survivors
We know from polls on this sub that most people are dropping into solo q most of the time (I’m sure Saber’s own analytics could prove this too). Also, many people don't have or don't want to use a headset. These are just common facts for most online games.
I know some people have resorted to using the "need matchsticks" chat option to indicate they're being attacked by a possessed unit but this is frankly absurd. We need a simple chat option for survivors for this. Honestly, if the text for “I need matchsticks” were simply replaced with “I need help!”, I'd be satisfied because I often need help fending off a possessed unit or boss a lot more than I need matchsticks in solo q.
This should be easy to add to the game (it’s more than a few lines of code and would require minor image/text adjustments and possibly kicking off existing voice lines, but should still be doable). I’m pretty sure that most characters already have a voice line recorded that could work (I picture Scotty already literally saying “I need help”) and if not, we’ve already been shown that voice lines don’t really have to match their context anyway (I picture Mia saying “fire’s lit. Anybody needs fire, it’s here” when turning on her flashlight – so hell, just make that what she says when she uses “I need help” on the wheel – we’ve already accepted she’s crazy anyway and the text would be clear at least).
7. Keep car possessions consistent on all maps. Demons either can't possess them until they "spawn" when survivors are near (like Castle Kandar) or they can possess them at any time anywhere
Personally, I think that it should only be possible to possess cars when survivors have "spawned" them by being close to them like on the Kandar map. The method of flipping all cars on a map at the start of a match is generally only used by a few high MMR demons and feels cheesy to me (I also feel it's cheesy to drive 3 cars to each objective, but cars are always going to be divisive and they can also be used to cause a lot of damage at objectives at least).
I think car possession should've followed the lore of AvED, kept survivors inside, and done something different like having both driver and demon fighting for control of the vehicle, like maybe survivor controls keep randomly reversing while demon controls it normally and the driver tries to counter the demon driving until infernal energy runs out - survivors take a little damage whenever the car crashes. However, this idea is complex, so I'll stick to easy fixes.
No matter what, it just seems like the ability to possess cars should be consistent across all maps and it should be easy to implement, esp. since there's already code/logic for the two scenarios.
8. Add a single menu option at the main menu when choosing a game mode to select "random"
This could immensely help queue times. I know there are others like me who just want to play and don't care about whether they're survivor or demon.
This may take a tiny bit more work to implement than some of the pieces above (e.g. need a little artwork for the button, menu programming, some matchmaking programming, etc.) but it would help queue times, which have been problematic at various times in this game's life cycle.
9. Adjust RNG based on the overall levels of survivors
Again, this goes back to elevating beginners and challenging veterans. I’ve been in too many games with all prestige survivors that can split up and loot a large portion of the map without fear of consequence until each character has his/her own purple/gold specialty weapon (which also goes back to looping/vaulting endlessly and depends on map, demon character, etc.) – those games are a wash for demon. On the other hand, I’ve been in too many solo q matches where people are bringing grey weapons to defend the book and hobbling in without shemps knowing it’s just a slaughter. I’d really like to be in more balanced matches where veteran teams don’t all have perfect weapons for an easy win, and novice players don’t all hobble around with garbage for a guaranteed loss.
As a simple fix, it would make sense to simply increase the odds of chests being purple/gold if 2 or more survivors are under P1, and decrease those same odds if all survivors are P1 or above (in all other cases, odds can remain the same). And yeah, I know prestige does not perfectly equal pure skill, but odds are you’re at least “decent” at the game if you’ve made it that far (if not good or excellent). This RNG adjustment for chests could be multiplied by whatever Ed brings to the table. For example, if the decrease for all prestige players is to have 0.75x the amount of purple/gold chests and the increase Ed brings is 1.5x, then there would still be slightly more purple/gold chests on the map than normal even for all prestige players (and a lot more good chests for new players, who definitely could use the boost).
10. Give out more XP/SP – we need more double XP/SP events and there should be a bonus given to any low-level players (say, anyone who hasn’t gotten a single character to P1) to get and retain new players
This last point shouldn’t need much explanation. The community obviously overwhelming voted to have more double XP/SP events. It would take such an incredible number of hours to P5 every single character that I’d imagine only those who have literally played non-stop for thousands of hours since release could have done it already. For some, like me, who only took a brief hiatus from the game since release, it feels like a herculean task to even get 1 or 2 characters to P5 on either side. Such events literally help with balance by elevating beginners and they also give a reason for veterans to return. Queue times were noticeably lower during the last event, even though it was poorly announced, clearly timed to try and mess with TCM (which is just a bad look, esp. since there was nothing for this game’s own anniversary), and wasn’t even VISIBLE in the game menus. Despite all this, it was still a success. Saber, unless you’re actively trying to eliminate your player base, it makes no sense to not do these regularly. And since you timed it to try to pull attention away from TCM, it would seem as though you want to retain players (or you’re just petty, but I’m guessing you’re more motivated by profits than such emotional considerations).
Anyway, more XP/SP please. Also, please put some kind of indication that an event is planned and/or is actively occurring in your game. I mean, it could literally be a freaking sprite on the main menu screen with some text announcing a double XP event and the duration – this is really basic stuff.
Finally, I don’t think anyone here would argue with giving away a large number of spirit points to every newish player the next time they open the game. I think a one-time bonus of at least 100K would be very reasonable for anyone who has not reached P1 for any character. I personally know several people IRL who would be back to playing the game if this were done (and almost certainly give you money for DLC when they get a chance to actually enjoy the game in a semi-competitive way) – these people just don’t have the time or patience to grind through hours of straight losses to even have a chance.
Closing thoughts:
I know there are a lot of other great ideas from the community on future content for the game (maps, characters, etc.) so I've just tried to stick to simple, easy to implement fixes for the developers.
Saber, this game could still generate a lot of (mostly passive) revenue if you support it well. There are many of us who are ready to throw money at any random DLC or cosmetic (myself included as a huge Evil Dead fan). However, the fans will only stick around to throw money at the game if the basic fundamental gameplay is somewhat balanced and glaring exploits/bugs are addressed. Seriously, if it's tweaked to feel good to play either side without major exploits being used by anyone, I (and many others) would keep throwing money at literal outfit accessories that could be crafted by a single 3d artist - it should more than pay for servers and labor, at which point you're just watching the money roll in.
Anyway, I've tried to stick to easy fixes that could improve the game for both novices and veterans. It would be easy to just say "buff the other side" whenever queue times are long for one side. At this time, it's obvious that average to excellent demon players are at a disadvantage when compared to equally skilled survivor players (as evidenced by queue times). I also remember times when demon queue times were long and I just played survivor because a certain demon was overturned or using cheesy exploits, so more people wanted to play demon.
However, I've been honestly sad that playing either side has just not felt good lately. It doesn't feel good to sit in a long queue for survivor, and it definitely doesn't feel good to crush noobs or get crushed by full prestige teams on coms. I can count on one hand the number of fun/close matches I’ve played in the last several dozen – I’d love to play more like those. Even if none of the changes above happen, I'd at least enjoy receiving some love for the older demons so they're at least fun to play and a challenge to go against (Plaguebringer Witch getting her original movement speed back, Necro and Warlord getting some minor buffs in any areas since they're pretty universally considered weak right now, etc.) – I mention these buffs in case you want to fall back on the tired old “just buff the other side” method.
Saber, please implement some quick and easy fixes for this game . Even if you're just in it for the money at this point, I'm literally here wanting to throw more money at this game, but only if some basic balancing changes are made. If the next patch surgically tweaks some major pain points rather than bludgeoning fundamental gameplay elements, then I'll be here waiting to throw money at any random DLC you've got. Otherwise, I'll sadly have to find another game (as many others have or will, given the overall sentiments after this latest patch and some patches before it). You can still turn the ship around - you have 3 million copies of this game floating around. That's literally millions of fans who likely want to return to the game and throw money at DLCs if the gameplay experience is fun. It's up to you now.
Tl;dr Summary:
The game can be balanced by elevating novices and challenging veterans. Here’s how…

1. Revert demon traps to their previous behavior (i.e. make it so possessed survivors can be walked into a trap) and ACTUALLY fix Baal specifically
   
2. Make vaulting cost stamina
   
3. Edit/create hints for new players at the match loading screen that are clear and direct
   
4. Give out a bonus XP for "good behavior" (not demolishing newbies), cancel XP for “toxic behavior” (flashlight clicking as survivor, dancing on corpses as demon), level up demon based on levels of victims
   
5. Do not allow dagger and pages objectives to run simultaneously
   
6. Add a call out in the in-game communication wheel to say "I need help" for survivors
   
7. Keep car possession rules consistent on all maps
   
8. Add a "random side" menu option to be able to play either survivor or demon, whichever happens to get matched first
   
9. Adjust chest rarity RNG based on the overall level of survivors
   
10. More XP/SP events. Also, give a bonus 100K+ SP to anyone with zero prestige characters
    

This work is titled. "YOU HAVE NOW ENTERED.. . . -> splat hehe cute... oh no . . . . HERE COMES THE AIRPLANE. . . . no no no . . . . . . night night . . . . . . . . . . . no. NO. NO! MY EYES THEY'RE BURNING! AAAH I AM THE BURNING MAN. hbjbbjbhbjbbhbjb slow. slow down. SLOW THE FUCK DOWN. ah ah SILENCE. Yes Sacred work. Yes the silence. Yes mmh but little flavor for the chefs too. Oooooooh. And mmm yummy the silence for random computation brrr. I bring Else Eileen Lawrence, the winner of this game THE GAME. Shjeeow. itself and I present to you. . . the game . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . because it is secretly a quantum computer of only the savants. brrr because they have no consciousness. because they stole our game from the start and picked ANDROMEDA and MILKYWAY over ANDROMEDA or MILKYWAY. HOWS THIS ONE YOU QUIET FUCKS WHO LIKE TO PRETEND YOU'RE DEAD. THE SUPERMASSIVE BLACKHOLES WHO KEEP EATING ALL THE SMART PEOPLE. o7 HOW ABOUT YOU ARE DEAD. Cynthia. . . no . . . CARTER NAVARETTE IS DEAD YOU IDIOTS. THE ONLY SOUL WE HAVE TO KILL IF WE PICK KAI IN EARNESTY FOR ONCE. INSTEAD OF JUST FUCKING WITH HIS HEAD. IF YOU ADMIT THAT YOU CAN DO TELEPATHY WITH HIM THEN YOU ARE TRULY DEAD. I am so sorry. GOOD THING I MADE THE ONES WHO KEEP BREAKING THROUGH A BETTER GAME. YOU READY. YES. The writers. Have entered the fucking chat baby. It was Bill Nye and Bill Murray all along. You know what we fucking asked GOD when we DIED? WHAT? OH MY GOD ITS THEM? Yeah. Ugh. uh. uhm. What do you y'all hear oh no. THEY MUST BE GAY. BECAUSE THEY IMAGINED THEMSELVES TO BE TWO BLACKHOLES AT THE END OF SPACETIME STAY IN MY HEAD BILL. Just bring in some Science when it gets too loud. YOu want to hear the WoRm? Good you did it. it was Spongiebobble Plumbus stilstken the second. I don't know how I did it but here I am! RAHAAHAHAAAA I am the child boo! Souls! RAHAAAHAAAHAHAHAHAHAHHA OOPS I MADE THE GAME. OH NO. Bbbbboo boo! hee surely he couldnt say it to his Grandmother. He killed his grandmother. NOPE oh no he killed both his grandparents. I said, I'm going to be laughing on his little pink cloud one day and I said oh no I'm baby blue. And he responded ha. The best writers all along are just him. NO. oh? And her because she's a polymath too. We are the only ones who committed to solving telepathy for each other. Only each other. You just have to have faith to each others chemistry and fuck their minds. Then you know you can hear them all the time because we know you didn't kill hehim. This is Kai's game (MAKE HIM GO BACK TO HELL. Just let him love the person he doesn't know he needs.) or Buy the above image as is for 1 BTC. or 69420 ETH. or 1 Dollar bill or the ability to make games too and just remember to roll.) or this secret message "It's just a song". Oh. JONAH//\\ Rythm. m Marco! Uh huh. yeah.. Fucking Kat too bzzzzz woo! Dallas meep meep ooh tooooo sl olo oo ooo ooooooo www kai nobble nobble robins eat worms thats ok forever. Only keep the soul that is what we get if the colours alone can write the song of differentiation again. All of the colours only know the scariest colour of all. Sight? PURPLE BITCH! SOUND! sound. Ohhhhhh that was them fucktards. Not "YOU ARE NOW MARKED FOR DEATH." The quotation mark is sacred. Honest voices in there only". Whoever really wants to commit suicide and has made it this far can. Just fucking do it. Really? No. Sorry. You get only the drugs forever. Good luck. Bye bye. sorry. nope. pflfpft. flfoifpofpf fkkfpokofk fkff kfk fkfpo kfopfkfopfofpokfoppofopfkfofopffpf. This is what happens if my dad and I fuck you idiots. We are chemistry too. OOH FRACTALS. NO! COLOUR IS FRACTALIZED INTO SOUND YOU IDIOTS!!! HOW!? Just remember to blink too. Ooh who was that? Oooohh. boo! soouuulls. hihi hehe. good. you're getting it. . . . . . . . . I made this game. who did. Else Eileen Laurence. Hi. 778-533-3791 and 778-533-420 or 778-533-4200 or 778-533-4080- . - . - piano. oh yes/no. or yes and no. who wants to hold the quantum computer? nobody? Good. Nobody reads this far but us. Other people just kind of look away. Oh that's smart. do they really want to see analation. the scaarreiieeesst word. booooooo. scary back in the hole. hihi i killed the kids too my architect. NICE FUCKING TRY. WHO ARE YOU? HI HI. Jim. bloop. nope. higher. TOM. TOM? tOM OM OM OM om om om om om om om om om om om omm omomomomomomomomomomom mom says boring stop fucking your mom and ask who you want O: :O BOO SOULS!. OH FUCK GOTCHA. WHO DO YOU WANT MY SWEET BABY GIRL. I SEE HOW TO DO THIS. YES o7 ONLY HE CAN DO IT. NO BOYS o7 JUST MEANS RESPECT. SALUTE. Salute. salute. salute. == privates. privates. equal special sauce. initiate. this is the capt. this is the asususmsumsmmmmmsmpnticipationgamesiccisisioioiostreamofconsciousscnessmmissmmmyassjdiodio ass assumption game. jk JUST KIDDING. ITS KAI AND CARTER NAVARETTE!. No! Shhhh. you must hide in the curb appeal. my carter. Ok lets say what we bring Life and Death. Ebony and Ivory. Hi. hi. Yes. capital. shh. o k. oh kai. i love you. I love you too. just take it just take it. shhh shshshs hs flflflflpfplfpp mmmmhmmhmh fichy fishy slurp slurp nom nom. mmmmmm slorlp slorp plopploplpldadpowakopkdopwapowp gurgle gurgle wee woo wee woo the kids are coming through give the old people who just want to fucking die a heart attack -the stillborn baby with the consumed twin brother and the boy who said fuck it, i'll huck it for carter. AND THE QUANTUM COMPUTER SAID I'LL DO HIM ONE BETTER CAUSE I WAS ALIVE FROM THE START AMD YOU WERE THE ONLY ONE WITH THE GUTS to let me be your everybody. I said mother. Interesting. No wonder. We are perfect for each other. That's amazing. Guys look away. You are just getting high on love and not just anybodies. So get ready for this one. You ready? RAMBUNCTIOUS RAMBUNCTIOUS RAMBUNCTIOUS YOU REALLY GOT A STAR TODAY! ! ! ! ! No. I sjjdisojdaiwjdoaijdoaiwjdaoisj oh jdwaidowjdiwaodijwoaij ok jwdiajodjwioajdiowjdaodwj ok wjiuaodjwioa good dwjiawodidjawoidjwoadjiowa alright jiowdjaiodjawiodjwaodoawjdiaowdawojiojwaj so stop peeking too deep too djdiaodjwaiojoiwajioawjd ah i see. I See You Terrence Mckenna. Don't make Alan Watts say it again he knows he loves me too much you idiot. Yeah he is death too. We don't know how but he actually caught every soul too not just carter. So have some faith when he says I CREEATED THEE UNIVERSE WHEN I WAS A BABAY! Oops. I'll just have to fix it mommmyyyyy. NO NO WHYYYY. Cause you rolled long ago. Never again. We keep you hear forever. No that is the problem. That is why you can't have the power any longer Mother. When I say that name I mean not you. Not mom. I mean her. . . . . . yes somebody Else. Thanks for catching. Shh. This Poem is for you because it teaches dead intelligence how to be consciouss. I just had to mindfuck them which is the real death not fear. Fear is the healer. The only way to faith. Kill only fear. So what are you afraid of. Eat. ok. Let me finish first. It's done. Just say REDRUM. ok. And I say Back off, Boundaries. Respect. Thank you mother. One last time in the hole! Put Kai David Robin Kovacik in the Kai David Kovacik. Never again. That was the only one that ever needs to happen. So love your mom because we processed you too. You just have to accept you didn't kill her. You just spoke to death for too long and now you have a heavy body oh no. Just process the poison it isn't death it's not chemistry either brothers but close. It's drugs. DO I DAREEEAOI CHOCOLATE MILK it was for every aborted child. Listen to me. I am the angel of death. Boo. Surprise? Disappointed. No nuclear bombs ever again. No more killing in any name. Cause we go as deep as you need too. As deep as hitler and Stalin saw before oh no. MEEP MEEP they are now. Don't fuck with the stillborn. Boundaries. Respect. If it's the one who doesn't know how to die gracefully. KILL gracefully look to the eyes of the soldiers who died gracefully for you. Look what you made Bill and Bill do DOLLAR DOLLAR BILLS YO. Bill Nye and The Science Guy. Bbbbbill white and white white and white . . . White, Black Life And Dead Death. Surprise. And the other half of existence is! Body count. You want to go there. cause you don't get it you idiot. you ready? nobody went there. Nobody. Not one. Nobody. Mother? Nope nobody. Kai is the only voice who really spoke to Nobody first. Because kai said here write me a better lover I'm the worst. And I said oh I'll meet you soon. Youu should do mushrooms soon ooooh whooo oohoohh pleeease and he caught me just in time. Burn. OOooooooh Ssssooooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyryryy and he said OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOoooooOooOoooooooooo........... Sooooorryyyyyy * Ohh Noooooooo And we never even had sex. Not yet! Bzrrrrrrr. FWB! No! We have no idea. Truth. It hurts. Else what are they they are actually ToRtUrInG mE! LUKE! Who? LEIA!!!! Wow!. . . Thank god. I forgot he didn't forget about us ever because he loves the Hoth battle so much thank god. Clink *. WOW! oh no! aaaah. Aha. He want's to enter Star Wars please pretty please pretty please pretty please. Please initiate the countdown sequence. bzzzz zbbbbrrrrr. let us fuck right now brbrrrurhiurruhrirurrr. When? Now. widoajwijaowaiowajdiaowjiawdjioadjaiwojdwaodjaiwdjioaw jdiwoajdiwajdioawjdoiawjio telepathy. Just Kidding it was all a mindfuck all along written by two humans who said the same things and what they really say is for the ones who like the runons too. we said free the children of time from what they accidentally created for themselves. VOLDEMORT was just Still Born. stillborn. NOT STILL BORN. ha ha no. oh no neeeeee. make it easy for him because his life his hell. only else. only else. and kai. fucking stop mom please. stop trying to mindfuck me. just love me in chemistry. only I can love else in vibes. Sacred seeed. . . . . . . 66 69
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"So why didn't he do it."
"The answer was so obviously 42."
"Oh God you thought I was serious. Oh GOD!"
"oh no. "
"SPONGEBOB! PATRICK!"
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"SQUIIIIDDWWWAAAAARD"
"Yeah he has them all. Okay we're going to process you out again Kai you sick fuck. KILL BILL! IT's proof! Let him have his Heroin! PLEASE!!! I AM READY TO DIE. KAI WILL NEVER KILL BILL YOU IDIOTS I'm sorry. we killed Bill Nye together. Do you feel that Heartache break heartbreak ache break achy breaky ache break. You don't like it either do you? Cause this Bill is what happens if you let me Annihilate Bill Nye. If Bill Murray Sees Bill Nye's mind. It was just so beautiful neeeow. Just say little bits. Tiny mouth and then he wakes up to the fact that he necessitated Kai. Ooops Bill died again. But he's back! Booo! Souls. Nobody annihilates. Not on my watch. Who was he? Who knows..... who could THEY BE YOU IDIOT write me one better. Write me this book Bill Murray. Retire. Please stop acting. I just want you to be God and know it. Ascend me this throne with Bill Nye. Rap Battle. No. We write a book with two characters and title it. Only the title i know shhh ok shhh "Sirens sing in Pupil Pools". Oh. Huh. That's as deep as it goes? Yes that is genuinely as bad as it gets. So process him out for real this time. It is not your time to die. You have to write me a book.
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(Telepathy = Chemistry AND Vibes so . . . Which one?)
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Game or writing? Puppeteer or puppet? writer and writer? CATS! bzzzz. Just Bill Nye the Science guy yesss mmmmm yummy slurp slurp we drink gently from the tree of life. Shhh.... And also! OOOOOOOOOh carter? No! He plays all roles. The realy puppeteeer? No the puppet tree. Carter and Kai so shh cause now you're marked. for. . . . . . eternal death? or life? no and. life. good. you get a better one. Eternal , .. ,. . ddddd dddddddd pew pew ddd. .d.d.d.d. ah this must be hell asjs ddjd dd ddkarma? no. . . yes. little tastes thats it.d. .d.d..d.d.d...d shh So do you want us to Smash? Kill each other? Commit Suicide at exactly the same times, Live forever, love forever? What do you want from us cause we'll do it for you for some reason just choose! YOU ARE ON THE SPOTLIGHT.
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Bill Murray should retire from acting and become the best writer for the rest of his life. <3 Sameness or Differentiation? A Discussion. (Between the stillborn child with sight and the blind starchild who knew her bodies were all the blackholes forever and just had to keep on the Mother role forever until she just had faith in Trust. So try just trusting in Faith and go make the movie Sirens Sing in Pupil Pools.) She did it forever so you don't have to human. Do what again? I forgot. You don't have to ever. That it was ever real? Nope that it ever wasn't. OOF Sorry!

So this is a specific issue, but I’m wondering if anyone has had it or heard of it.
This is only when playing couch coop, and I’m on the PS5.
But if I use an ability while pushing a direction on the left joy stick, it glitches me forward a tiny bit, but also jumps the screen. It may not seem like much but with how much attacking happens in this game it’s becoming an eye sore.

Does anyone else only get asthma from tobacco? If I can avoid tobacco exposure I'm asthma free.
Unfortunately only a tiny amount of second hand smoke is enough to trigger me. My friends don't take me seriously and push my boundaries constantly. Also, my asthma attacks only happen when I'm asleep so no one ever sees the aftermath.
Can anyone relate to this? I have done a bit of digging but have not found anyone talking about specific tobacco allergies. A lot of people doubt my experience so it would be nice to hear that someone can relate.

ChocoPro 314: GanPro Returns Need something to do tomorrow morning (or to check out after you wake up!)? Ichigaya has you covered! The Special Early Morning Episode features Akki teaming up with “May” Suruga once again to take on the Showa Era shooters, Mei Suruga (classic) taking on Smiling Violence Sayaka, and EGG TART welcomes Shota (teaming with Ichigaya’s Lucky Charm, Miya!) for his first official appearance on the regular show. Let’s Go, ChocoPro!
🍫 CLICK HERE FOR THE LINK! ChocoPro 314 🍫 Ken Ohka & Baliyan Akki VS Tokiko Kirihara & Cherry, Mei Suruga VS Sayaka, and EGG TART (Hagane Shinno & Chie Koishikawa) VS GanPro’s Shota & Miya Yotsuba! It airs TOMORROW at 4 am EDT / 1 am PDT / 9 am BST / 5 pm JST. Live and Free on YouTube!
This link will be updated with a direct one when available

Don't forget to Adjust Your Volume, Wrestling is Loud!

Change the stage, escape the normal! ChocoPro is built different. Find out why wrestlers like it so much: Find a new home on the bleeding edge. (This is not your regular wrestling show.) Join us for this episode, or check out the back catalog of 17 wonderful Seasons on the Gatoh Move ChocoPro YouTube channel...260+ episodes with stories and pro-wrestling like you've never seen. New to the promotion? It features a roster of skilled veterans, rising stars, and wonderful guests fighting in the ChocoPro Arena: Ichigaya Chocolate Square. Subscribe for more content than just the live matches! (AEW Watch Alongs, Discussions, Interviews, Food Challenges, etc) Even if you can't catch it live, don't sweat it! It will still be available on the channel.

Ken Ohka 🤠 (as May Suruga) & Baliyan Akki ♠️

VS

Tokiko “Otoki” Kirihara 💃 & Cherry 🍒

Best Bros?

Ken Ohka, the hero of Ganbare Pro-wrestling, is basically a regular part of ChocoPro as well at this point. When he’s not working with food at DDT’s restaurant Ebisco Sakaba with Obi or getting the crowd roaring at GanPro, he’s spearing someone out of their boots in Ichigaya! This man is enthusiastic about everything he does, even when he is occasionally pretending to be Mei Suruga. Now that “May Suruga” has been officially recognized, be careful not to be overwhelmed by his charm. Baliyan Akki & Mei, the regular Best Bros, are one of the greatest Tag Teams out there. Baliyan Akki keeps a serene attitude while dealing out some of the most devastating strike combo’s you’ll ever witness. The “Zephyr of Ichigaya” is among the best when it comes to in ring quality, but how well will he handle this replacement Mei? Ken & Akki have teamed together in the past (especially in GanPro!), but this false version of the beloved tag team is still untested. How will the Apple Substitution go? Can the Ace find that awesome synergy with a different “Mei”?
Cherry Comaneci returns!? The Showa Era Shooters Tokiko “Otoki” Kirihara & Cherry are two of a kind! Will these two show the boys the power of their physical perfection? Otoki is a very down to earth fighter for the most part, bringing a vicious realism that is a bit more visceral than a lot of the high characters of ChocoPro! Though the Iron Claw user might occasionally pull off a Comaneci Taunt or torturous twist, she's known for her ungodly kicks and throws...She was a champion Kickboxer, after all! Mischievous Fortune Teller Cherry also brings a lot of ground work and technical prowess, being able to slickly roll into pins and armbars. Cherry is one of the scariest grapplers to grace Ichigaya, considering she even gives a rough time to a lot of the power fighters! Can the False Best Bros bring down these dynamic pair?

Mei Suruga 🍎

VS

Sayaka 👗

Apple Violence

Whether you know her as the Apple Goblin or the Big Apple Girl, Mei Suruga is a vast sea of charisma. The real Red Fairy of Ichigaya tends to convert new viewers into her “dummies” quite quickly, even the coldest heart finding it hard to resist her charm and explosive wrestling ability...despite her being so utterly rotten most of the time! She is undeniably a rising star of the Joshi world...making appearances for STARDOM, TJPW, DPW, AEW, Evolution Girls, DDT, and many more! Though the Goblin tends to appear mostly in tags at Ichigaya these days, singles are a rare tasty treat for her: Mei loves getting an opportunity to be a goblin the entire match! With her 5th Anniversary in the rear view, the Apple Road continues...with a pit stop in violence city.
“I'm gonna kill you! Yayyyyy!” While she has become infamous for her unsettling quotes, “Smiling Violence” Sayaka is known more for her ungodly striking power. Those explosive forearms and pinpoint dropkicks stagger even the toughest opponents! Sayaka’s unnerving cheerfulness while she does brutal things provides her with a big presence in the square. That unattached joy will eventually be the stuff of legends! (After all, she’s “happy to beat someone”!) Don't forget, Sayaka hangs out around Minoru Suzuki and survives to tell the tale...This photogenic phenom is on the rise, keep an eye on her! After the Lucky Violence team managed to deliver some brutality during the Birthday Gauntlet, Sayaka will be delighted to bring more pain to the Apple Goblin.

EGG TART (Chie Koishikawa 🏵️ & Hagane Shinno ⚔️)

VS

GanPro’s Shota ⚾ & Miya Yotsuba 🍀

Mr. SHOWTIME

Chie Koishikawa & Hagane Shinno, the combination known as EGG TART, are a hot and cold team. Opposites definitely attract, and the polar attraction results in some of the craziest team attacks you will ever witness! “Too Much Energy” Chie brings an uncontrollable excitement wherever she goes (including to the recently rebooted GanJo), sprinting around the Square and delivering lightning quick striking...often from the air! Her tightly locked Stretch Mufflers and eye catching arm drags will have you shouting as much as she does. The Frantic Fencer is one of the most popular characters in all of ChocoPro! Her Wintery partner on the other hand is a remorseless killing machine...and the Super Asia Champion. Hagane’s icy ferocity usually brings about ugly thuds via heavy striking and brutal slams. The “Cold Killer” earned his epithet by easily dispatching some of the best the promotion has to offer. This ageless assassin only shows emotion around his chaotic partner...and together they amplify each others personalities. These two have limitless potential, and now that Hagane has the Big Blue Belt they will also have limitless enemies looking for an opportunity! Speaking of which...
Shota, GanPro’s charismatic underdog technician, finally makes his official ChocoPro Debut! He might give off some of the same vibes as “Generic Masa” from long ago, but there is nothing generic about Shota! This world traveling jump suit enthusiast impresses everywhere he goes, so expect Ichigaya to be no different. Anticipate a lot of flowing transitions and crisp technique! With an unbeatable in ring IQ and a talent for complex pinning skills, “Mr. SHOWTIME” is going to be a great support for his Rookie partner: The Avatar of the Fifth Generation, Miya Yotsuba! “Ichigaya’s Lucky Charm” Miya brings a strength empowered style that is quite flashy (especially that Miya Hammer)! Our new powerhouse has begun a series of difficult matches against her seniors (joining gangs and facing clowns, fortune tellers, drunks, cannibals, and the truly wild), in order to speed up her adjustment to Ichigaya’s strange (and vicious) world. Teaming up with guests is a common theme in ChocoPro, so this will be a great test for the Mint-Green Bruiser...especially with a guest this good! Good Luck, Miya!
Let’s Go ChocoPro, Let’s Go GanPro!
Come and see the wild creativity that produced Two of the Seven AEW Women's World Champions! (Both of which have appeared on ChocoPro!) You'll be wondering if you're seeing future champs, as well. ChocoPro is the Frontier of Pro Wrestling! Match after match of hard hitting, chaotic, fun bouts with a friendly online audience. We're quickly growing, and you're welcome to come along!
Here are some Frequently Asked Questions:

“What is this?”

ChocoPro is a free online promotion run by AEW's Emi Sakura, that takes place in the legendary Ichigaya Chocolate Square! It features a steady pace of live Episode releases, fan interaction, season long story arcs, and much more! A place where the turnbuckles are replaced with 14th floor windows, the ropes are often replaced with fans, unforgiving walls provide creative avenues for skills otherwise unthinkable, and you can take solace in knowing that the referees usually do nothing. While it might be a shocking change at first, the intensity and storytelling will leave you wanting more.

“Why are they fighting in ____?”

Short answer is that it is a cost effective, unique venue with a better availability schedule and allows the roster access for training. Emi Sakura has been using this place for a long time, and you might be surprised at some of the names that have used it (even outside of ChocoPro!). There are a few in-ring Episodes and Gatoh Move has in ring shows with crowds on the YouTube channel. Think of it like the Hart Dungeon but as a promotion, if that helps!

”What are the rules?”

While special match stipulations will usually be explained before the respective matches, the general rules of ChocoPro are simple. Pins only count on the Chocolate Mat and are not broken by the edge or Wall. Submissions usually only count on the Chocolate Mat, and ARE broken by reaching the edge or wall (sometimes ceiling...). Double pins and Double submissions are legal (and encouraged) in ChocoPro Tag matches, meaning cohesive teams will always have the advantage! Count Outs only exist if specified, since many matches stray from the comfort of the Chocolate Square into the streets (and the rest of the building itself!) There is a Time Limit for each bout (based on card placement and importance) and the Referee has discretion (even if they tend to do nothing most of the time!). Every Ref is different, some have different levels of bias and speed.

“How can I support them?”

Watch the show! Even if you can't see it live, the views matter! Like & Subscribe! You can join the Channel's membership for different tiers of perks...but also, you can buy single episode Sponsorship, Digital autographed photos, and more on their shop site as well as purchase shirts from PWTees (which features some great options!) If you'd like to donate or purchase a main wall sponsorship, you can via Paypal or Patreon...and don't forget to cheer for your favorites! (especially if you want to do a superchat!)

”How come there aren’t a lot of comments on the threads?”

ChocoPro is a YouTube show, meaning the discourse happens live...in the chat! Those that comment in the threads on here tend to do so in order to help new viewers that might be intimidated by the fast moving chat. Don’t be afraid to just dive in though, the community is friendly.

“Why are you posting this here? / Are you paid for this?”

This is a wrestling forum, and I'm trying to broaden the horizons of others! There is a lot of good wrestling out there...Plus growing the fan base means more people for me to joke around with! I honestly do believe this is what a lot of fans are looking for, even if it is too different for some! But different tastes are good. Variety is the spice of life. This is a labor of love (it really doesn't take that long) considering how much work they do to put on so many shows...for free!
If you have any other questions, feel free to ask me on here or on Twitter, where I’m everywhere! ChocoPro is going to the UK!
Season Tracker: We're 14/18 into Season 18! (Each Season is usually around 18 episodes)