I picked up the game after my friend's recommendation and after seeing Yahtzee's review and AI love it. Procedurally generated games usually suffer from blandness and repetitiveness, which seems to NOT be the case of SoD. Or, if repetitive, it is immersing, as you're getting better at cracking cases, but you can always take an unorthodox take on the case.
The side quests are so great! However I would like a tele lens, so you could capture your targets from a distance.
Also, even though I am not sure if it was game-breaking, it would be cool to have an access to fingerprint database, searching by name makes the work easier, but at least some sort of to connect just finger prints to someone would be cool.
Smoking. We need smoking as much as Harry Du Bois needs a bit of love.
Augmentations for mapping out surrounding vents would be nice, but not necessary.
I find it funny how blurred is the line between a detective and a burglar. Love it.
And what I really think should be implemented more, are windowsills, fire stairs and balconies. The risk compensating for somewhat easier access to flats that are not connected to the vents would be the wet status while jumping from sledge to ledge 12 floors above ground - seems balanced to me.
And definitely cheap hotels. Yeah, you have your flat (if you do) but skipping time at cheap brot/hotel would be fitting, for one, two, it could bring a spin on solving the crimes as the staff would for enough money have a lot of info on people.
Stay sleuthing!

So metro bags been extra sweaty for me 😂. Ive played with great players who try to get high ground and win from above. That’s normally the strat. Last night I played with a top 10 player and she had us stay low the entire game and slowly work our way to zone. It was an entirely different game experience. She said it was comp style… defensive, slow, prioritized getting zone at the end and stopping receives…
Which do you guys prefer high game in metro or low and sneaky?

What is a man but fruit? What is a fruit but man? Men are fruity, by design. Lest women have *all* the fun. He carves himself into the shape of the fruit of his choice. One man is carving out his place on the roadside, he has exited his car on the dusty side of a back road in Gruni. He has travelled through a farmer's field in the blistering sun and stand by the road, he withdraws a pocket knife from the inside of his glovebox and cuts an orange down from the tree.
It is warm and firm in his hand, hot even. Like freshed baked goods straight from a bakers oven or that of a woman's breast. He cuts the top and bottom off and casts them aside for bugs to eat and birds to sharpen their beaks on before cutting it into 8 equalish chunks. A grin cascades across his face like a rolling tide before he bites and sucks into the tender flesh with the same passion he would give his wife. The hot sun beats down on his receding brow, gore sticks in his teeth and bloody juice stickys up his moustache. Yes, this will be what is to come.
A cormorant flies above him, above the orange fields and dusty roads and hot dry air. It's wings feel the blessing of wind beneath them, a privilege not afforded to those on the ground. It is further inland than it intended to be, it soars towards the ocean a few miles away over lush white terraced rooves and the hustle and bustle of the coastal life. The cities and towns that line the coasts are beautiful facades of marble coloured stone, beautifully shining in the hot sun and juxtaposed against the deep blue sea.
The man imagines a fleet of tourist buses trawling these roads, fat Arcasians and their Lespian mistresses gazing wondrously at the immortal simplicity of the farmer and his field - what quaint lives they live. Then they would return to those marbled towns and lose themselves in cocktails and food and nightlife while their capital would dissipate into the bosom of the nation. A grand ministry, the grandest - of sprawling fields of fruit and pig-faced tourists to consume it's boon.

"Be excellent to each other... and party on dudes!"

He is Bill S. Preston, Esq.! And he is Ted "Theodore" Logan! And together, they are Wyld Stallyns!
To everyone else in late-80s/early-90s San Dimas, California, Wyld Stallyns may look like the impossible dream of two slackers with no skill in anything else. But in truth, the music of Wyld Stallyns is so bodacious, so non-heinous, so excellent that it brings about an era of prosperity, both across the earth and to the stars beyond, and technological advancement so advanced that even time can be accessed as freely as a 10-digit phone number from the nearest payphone. Because of this, agents from the future utopia have sent back a time-travelling phone booth as well as information about the future to make sure that Bill and Ted are able to continue having most excellent adventures and fulfill the destiny of Wyld Stallyns.

Key

Movies:
^EA = Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure
^BJ = Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey
^FtM - Bill & Ted Face the Music
Shows:
^CSxEy = Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventures (DiC Animated Series); Season X Episode Y
^LAEx = Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventures (Fox Live Action Series); Episode X
Comics:
^M#X = Bill & Ted's Excellent Comic Book (Marvel Comics) Issue #X
^BVx#y = Boom! Studios Comics; Volume X, Issue #Y

Vol. 1 = Bill & Ted's Triumphant Return
Vol. 2 = Bill & Ted Go To Hell
Vol. 3 = Bill & Ted Save the Universe
BV1#xS = Boom! Studios Comics; Side Story

^DH#X = Dark Horse Comics (Face the Music Compliant) Issue #X
Games:
^AL = Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure (Atari Lynx)
^NES = Bill & Ted's Excellent Video Game Adventure (NES)
^WS = Wyld Stallyns (Mobile Game)
Live Show:
^EHAyy = Bill & Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure; 19YY/20YY

Bill and Ted

Strength

• Twist around several amps while running as a blur. ^CS1E7
  
• Run straight through several tentpoles. ^CS1E7
  
• Hold themselves against the winds created by a giant monster that toss around buses and tanks. ^CS2E5
  
• Push around large stone slabs. ^AL
  
• A version of Bill and Ted from a bad future become super jacked and help curbstomp a robot. ^FtM
  
• [Limitation] Struggle to do push-ups. ^BJ
  

Speed/Agility

• Dodge a stone discus launched hard enough to embed into a marble pillar, and a falling chandelier. ^CS1E2
  
• Dodge around weapons swung by Roman gladiators. ^CS1E3
  
• Dodge a speeding horse and a flying coffin. ^CS1E9
  
• Able to dodge a frog mid-jump. ^CS1E11
  
• Run off fast enough to kick up a trail of dust. ^CS2E1
  
• Intercept a cannon shot. ^CS2E1
  
• Dodge a cannon shot just before it hits. ^CS2E3
  
• As babies, able to run off hidden behind a cloud of baby powder. ^CS2E7
  
• Duck underneath a swinging pendulum. ^AL
  
• Very good at jumping really high. ^NES
  
• Dodge a booth as it falls from time jump. ^LAE2
  
• Disguise themselves as a doctor and a cadaver in the time it takes for a woman to leave a room. ^LAE3
  
• Scale up the snout of a large, metal dragon. ^BJ
  
• Attempt and almost succeed at intercepting a bullet, moving a good distance in the time it takes to go from a gun to a person feet away. ^EHA08
  
• Outrun several species of dinosaur. ^M#2
  
  • Outrun a T-Rex running fast enough to kick up large rocks in its wake. ^BV1#3S
• Dodge a superhero sent flying hard enough to leave a comet trail behind him. ^M#10
  
• Dodge around machine gun fire. ^M#11
  
  • Again. ^BV1#5
• Able to see the two drivers in a high speed chase. ^BV1#2S
  
• Hit a button that causes the spaceship they're in to lurch forward fast enough to send everyone inside tumbling, then run off before anyone else can catch their bearings. ^BV3#1
  

Durability

• Get tossed across a bar, their heads smashing through a thin wood wall. ^EA
  
• Fall from a second floor balcony into some bushes and walk it off. ^FtM
  
• Has Death thrown at them bodily and get back up. ^DH#3
  
• Crushed under a mountain of falling china. ^CS1E1
  
• Are sent flying back by their amplifier's exploding to little ill effect. ^CS1E1
  
• Have a stove dropped on their heads. ^CS1E2
  
• Launched through a window and fall a story down into a stone fountain. ^CS1E2
  
• Fall from the top of a three-story building into some bushes. ^CS1E4
  
• Get slammed into a brick wall hard enough to indent. ^CS1E7
  
• Get launched into the air by their inflatable shoes and then fall back down. ^CS1E9
  
• Get kicked out of a stadium hard enough to send them flying, toppling a food cart. ^CS1E9
  
• Get blasted high into the air by a jet of water strong enough to blow away a stone statue, then land in a river. ^AL
  
• Get blasted back by the explosion from this huge gun. ^M#8
  
• Punch themselves. ^M#11
  
• Get zapped in a clash between Darth Vader and Gandalf and walk it off. ^EHA02
  
• Fall down a trap door a dozen feet and get up fine. ^BV3#1
  
• Hit a button that causes the spaceship they're in to lurch forward fast enough to send everyone inside tumbling, then run off before anyone else can catch their bearings. ^BV3#1
  
• Take hits from the Death Quills of Koloko IV, the Lightning Web, the Fire Bones of Kykartian Dragodon, the Cyberwasps of the Robot Zoo Planet, and the Lavaspin of Sector 487. ^BV3#2
  
• Roll into a snowball then crash into a building hard enough to demolish it. ^DH#3
  
• [Limitation] A long fall from the top of this cliff is enough to instantly kill them. ^BJ
  

Skill

• Easily bat in a baseball game one-handed while focusing on other things. Ted even throws the bat so that it spins hard enough to hit the ball without him holding it. ^CS2E3
  
• Jump from an upper banister and swing down on ropes, knocking out two guys and stealing their weapons in the process. ^LAE6
  
• Briefly hold their own in a duel, despite neither having any dueling experience. ^M#1
  

Intelligence
Yes, really.

• Can comprehend and utilize stable time loops. ^EA
  
  • Leave a recording device hidden in the corner of a room with a timer to use as a distraction. ^EA
  • Leave a typed message for themselves at a printer with instructions to duck at just the perfect time. ^EA
  • Sets up a trash can to fall at the right time to trap Ted's father. ^EA
  • Outwit De Nomolos, setting up not only a sandbag and cage to fall at just the right time and place to disarm and trap him, but also set up a key for the cage and fake gun to trick him into believing that he would win the encounter. ^BJ
  • When they don't have access to a booth, they go back in time to ask Station to build one so that he's done in time for them to go back and ask. ^BV1#1
  • Loosen a chandelier just so that it falls on Vlad the Impaler's head while he's cornered them. ^BV3#1
• When they're being pursued by versions of them from a bad future, who remember everything they're about to do, they do something they can't possibly remember doing to escape. ^FtM
  
• Able to somewhat fix the booth's broken antennae with some fudge cans and a large wad of chewed gum. ^EA
  
  • Able to somewhat fix the booth's broken antennae with a magazine and a shoelace. ^LAE1
  • Able to more or less fix the booth's broken numpad by copying what they remember Station doing to fix it. ^BV1#3S
• Survive a long fall from within the booth by jumping at the last second. ^CS1E8
  
• Rig up a lever to launch Dracula out of the booth and onto a bed. ^CS1E9
  
• Make functional guitars out of laundry and string. ^CS1E12
  
• Make a castle display out of water sealant cans and boxes. ^LAE2
  
• Rewire a jukebox to play music from a walkman. ^LAE5
  
• Their advice helps their music teacher move on from heartbreak and live peacefully where before she was bitter and angry at everyone. ^LAE7
  
• Outwit Einstein, tricking him into delivering his speech about the Theory of Relativity instead of his bad stand up routine. ^LAE8
  
• Able to escape from Death with a Melvin. ^BJ
  
• Trick Evil Robot Bill and Ted into thinking they're the real good Bill and Ted. ^M#7
  
• Escape from a future prison by starting a fire to set off the fire alarm. ^M#8
  
• Impress Socrates with their philosophizing. ^EA
  
• Are able to convince Hyper-World, a planet who's entire society is predicated on comic book violence, to stop fighting... for a few seconds. ^M#10
  

Rockitude
Skill

• Wyld Stallyns' music eventually becomes good enough that it ushers in interplanetary peace. ^EA
  
  • Their music apparently brings about post-scarcity, or at least post-the need for money. ^CS1E12 ...NOT! ^M#8
  • Post-training and with full band backing, a televized broadcast of their performance is able to cause people of multiple different cultures around the world to jam. The newspapers of the following years also state that their touring schedule causes crops to grow in the American midwest and peace to come to the Middle East, that rumors of their split cause the stock market to plummet and when those rumors are disproven the stock market surges. ^BJ
• Seduce a pair of medieval babes with some off the cuff lyrics. ^EA
  
• Jam with Little Richard and a young Mozart. ^CS1E2
  
• Rock with Angus Young. ^EHA01
  
• Shred with James Hetfield. ^EHA06
  
• Tear it up with Fall Out Boy. ^EHA13
  
• Demolish with Axl Rose and Slash. ^EHA14
  
• Fuck it up with Kurt Kobain. ^EHA15
  
• Play the guitar very well with Freddy Mercury. ^EHA17
  
• Play a pocket organ well enough that the surrounding Roman guards are too busy dancing to notice them. ^AL
  
• Can play basically any instrument placed in front of them. ^FtM
  
• Calm an agitated baby dinosaur. ^BV1#3S
  
• Able to build guitars out of random debris in a gladiatorial death pit in a matter of seconds, then play well enough to pacify a rampaging alien monster who is also the most esteemed music critic in the galaxy. ^BV3#3
  
• Able to rouse a crowd of people from a society so downtrodden that the ability to smile has atrophied out of the gene pool. ^BV1#5
  
  • Writing one song is enough to uproot the entirety of said society and motivate Death to bring them back after dying even though he had lost the ability to do so. ^BV1#6
• Even God and Satan are fans. ^BV2#4
  
• Alien cultures that don't even speak English and who's entire cultures are predicated around war are brought to peace by hearing their music. ^BV3#1
  

Power

• Consistently blow out their amps while playing. ^EA
  
  • Blow out an amp and cause it to catch fire. ^LAE1
• Defeather a bird. ^CS1E1
  
• Shatter a porcelain cup. ^CS1E1
  
• Knock dozens of objects off of a nearby shelf and shatter windows. ^CS1E7
  
• A single resonant note is enough to knock out the Black Knight. ^CS1E7
  
• Even when hooked up to a boombox, are able to blow away people and tables. ^CS2E5
  
• After Bill rewires the amp, it causes Ted's guitar to melt through the floor. ^CS2E7
  
• After Station alters the amps a little, cause any avalanche. ^DH#4
  
• Destroy robots with their riffs alone. ^WS
  

Ghost Bill and Ted

• People can pass right through them, though it causes some unnerving (though not totally unpleasant) sensations. ^BJ
  
• Can possess the bodies of the living. ^BJ
  

Other

• Build the Great Wall of China in a couple days. Although not particularly well. ^CS1E1
  
  • They arrive in China on Saturday and have finished and leave before Monday. ^CS1E1
• Summon rain with an Incan rain dance. ^CS1E3
  
• Play a single player game co-op and one-handed. ^CS2E7
  
• Are able to beat Death at Battleship, Clue, Electronic Football, and Twister. ^BJ
  
  • And Monopoly. ^M#5
  • And Rock, Paper, Scissors. ^EHA17
• Can fly after being zapped by the F-Ray, which only convinces the brain that it is capable of flying, thus allowing it to fly. ^M#10
  
• Spend a week without sleeping and only eating snack foods trying to devise a plan to save Abraham Lincoln. ^M#11
  
• Are temporarily given God's divine enlightenment, able to see everything past and future, and on a micro and macro scale. ^BV2#4
  
• Surf on a black hole. ^BV3#3 They're obviously going through some form of spaghettification, but also given the size of the black hole, the audience, and the official helping them do it, it's likely that this black hole has been altered to be safe to surf.
  
• Have sex. ^BV1#1
  
• Do drugs. ^EHA00
  

Bill

Strength

• Knocks over the Liberty Bell with an elbow. ^CS1E5 The Liberty Bell weighs over 2000 lbs.
  
• Easily pitches and bats cannon balls that Ted had difficulty handling. ^CS1E9
  
• Knocks Ted into the air with an accidental headbutt. ^CS1E9
  
• Floors Monomonop with a yo-yo. ^M#8
  

Speed/Agility

• Pulls Ted out of the way of a flail. ^CS1E3
  
• Snatches a flying chip bag out of the air. ^CS2E2
  
• Bats a baseball pitched hard enough to leave a trail of flames. ^CS2E3
  
• Escapes from being grappled by swinging on a noose while the floor is dropped from under him. ^EHA92
  
• Ducks a bullet at close range. ^EHA08
  

Durability

• Takes a punch from Evil Robot Bill. ^M#7
  
• Takes a punch from Ronda Rousey. ^EHA16
  

Skill

• Spars with Joan of Arc. ^EA

Other

• Strong poker face. ^EA
  
• Folds a paper hat into a to-go box. ^CS1E1
  
• Rewires an amp which causes it to melt Ted's guitar through the floor. ^CS2E7
  
• Beats up the Invisible Woman using dark force powers gained as Darth Bogus. ^EHA05
  
  • Force chokes a man to the ground in an instant. ^EHA05
• Save nearly 70 people from being used as a virgin sacrifice. ^EHA13
  

Ted

Strength

• Knocks out a man in a leather helm with one strike. ^EA
  
• Accidentally sends Marco Polo flying with the swing of a broom. ^CS1E1
  
• Flicks a paper football hard enough to knock an apple into the air. ^CS1E2
  
• Breaks a wooden plank off on the T-800 Terminator, then knocks him into a well using a skateboard. ^EHA92
  

Speed/Agility

• Takes a tumble down the stairs hard enough to knock him out of his metalplate suit and somehow hides before anyone notices. ^EA
  
• Flip jumps to the top of the booth. ^CS1E5
  
• Dodges a swipe from behind from Vlad the Impaler. ^BV3#1
  

Durability

• Takes a tumble down the stairs hard enough to knock him out of his metalplate suit. ^EA
  
• Takes a headbutt to the chin that knocks him off of his feet and into the air. ^CS1E9
  
• Takes a full punch to the gut from Officer T. J. Hooker and brushes it off. ^EHA98
  
• Gets tackled to the ground and waled on by General Thade. ^EHA01
  
• Doesn't seem bothered touching a lightsaber with his bare skin. ^EHA05
  
• Gets smashed over the head with a guitar hard enough to crack it in half. ^BV1#4
  
• Thrown across the room onto the coffee table and is back on his feet shortly. ^BV2#1
  

Skill

• Flicks a paper football in such a way so that it flies around and knocks an apple off of Bill's head from the side. ^CS1E2
  
• Lassos the Black Knight while he's riding a horse full speed. But then forgets to keep a hold on the other end of the rope. ^CS1E7
  
• Briefly holds his own against an Italian fencer. ^LAE6
  

Other

• Reads the time and place text. ^CS1E1
  
• Starts a fire by rubbing George Washington's wooden teeth. ^M#8
  
• In a bad future where Ted was sent to military academy, he was able to double bust a corrupt cop by posing as a drug dealer. ^LAE4
  
• Kicks the Sith out of Darth Bogus. ^EHA05
  
• Gets with Taylor Swift. ^EHA13
  

Good Robot Bill and Ted

Robots created by the most brilliant mind in the universe, Station, to combat the powerful Evil Robot Bill and Ted. ^BJ

• The can be controlled via remote control but also seem to be capable of autonomous movement. ^BJ

Strength

• Punch through a brick wall. ^BJ
  
• Decapitate Evil Robot Bill and Ted with a punch, then cause their bodies to explode with a second punch. ^BJ
  
  • Evil Robot Bill and Ted no sell a punch to the chin from Bill and walk off crashing through a window and into a brick chimney. ^BJ
• Chew up a phone reciever. ^M#3
  
• Punch out the demonic Colonel Oats when the princesses couldn't faze him with their strikes. ^BV2#1
  
  • The princesses were smashing up musical equipment and sending other women flying with their strikes. ^BV1#6S
• High five each other hard enough to destroy each others' hands. Keep the Evil Robot Bill and Ted scaling in mind. ^DH#1
  
• Walk through a wall. ^DH#4
  

Durability

• Still functioning while demolished down to just their heads. ^M#7
  
  • Or arms. ^BV2#3
• Robot Ted gets blasted through several brick walls. ^BV3#4
  

They Run On Car Batteries

• They do. ^BV1#1S
  
• Electrocute two men to death when they try to stab them with rapiers. ^M#1
  
• Cause the booth to randomly jump when they electrocute it after touching some slushie material. ^M#12
  

Other

• Have tape recorders built in. ^M#3
  
• Can receive temporal emails, and promptly get a virus from this. ^BV1#1S
  
• Their code is written in a form of binary compose of "Bill"s and "Ted"s. With a source code constructed entirely of Van Halen references. ^BV1#1S
  
• Become presidents of the United States. ^BV1#2
  

Mecha Bill & Ted

• Rocket away from San Dimas to Scandinavia. ^DH#4
  
• Transforms from houses into humanoids form, piloted by Good Robot Bill & Ted. ^DH#4
  
• Beat up and send flying giant mountain trolls. ^DH#4
  

Mobile Suit Bill & Giganto-Ted

• Burst out of the sewers and through the streets, creating a massive tremor that could be felt from blocks away. ^BV1#6
  
• Disarm an entire crowd of guards with powerful magnets. ^BV1#6
  

The Time Booth

Time Travel

• A time machine that can travel to any place and time on earth after dialing a specific number. The number for each time and place is listed in an attached directory which catalogues most important points in history. ^EA
  
  • If Bill and Ted don't know what time or place they're looking for, they can ask the operator for help identifying a landmark. ^CS2E1
  • Can travel all the way back to the big bang. ^M#2
  • Is able to travel to and from "the center of time" which seems to exist outside of the regular timeline. ^M#6/7
• It is stressed multiple times throughout the series that even while time travelling, the clock in San Dimas is running, so Bill and Ted still have a limited amount of time to accomplish their goals while time travelling. ^EA This isn't well supported by other events and usages of the booth in the series, but it is a consistent concern regardless.
  
• Bill and Ted can use the Phone Booth to interact with themselves in the past, giving themselves needed equipment or advice. ^EA
  
  • Find a note of advice from themselves and then go back and leave the same note without having to even write it. ^AL
  • Get called to go forward from a few minutes beforehand to help out their future selves. ^EHA06
• Allow Bill and Ted to leave and then return to the exact same point in time, with 16 months of training in between. ^BJ
  
  • Further emphasizing that they can return to any point they want and San Dimas time doesn't matter. ^CS2E1
• A trip through spacetime can be cut short and will cause the booth to reappear at a median point. ^CS1E2
  
• A trip can also be reversed, allowing the booth to return to from where it just came. ^CS1E9
  
• A trip can be rerouted mid-stream without too much issue. ^CS1E10
  
• While this is not usually the case, as most time travel trips result in loops, drastically changing past events can lead to alternate present timelines. ^CS2E5
  
  • Bill and Ted use the booth to go back 15 minutes and redo a botched conversation resulting in a different outcome. ^LAE1
  • A closer to canon example. ^M#11
• Time travel 2 seconds into the future to catch an evil robot off guard. ^BV1#3
  
• Falling into the wormhole behind the phone booth can let someone travel through the circuits of time with it. ^EA
  
  • Rufus is able to follow a different phone booth using a grapple electric guitar, despite not being anywhere close to it when it time travels. ^BJ
  • The black knight and his horse are able to follow the booth. ^CS1E7
• Able to travel and be gone in the time it takes for a killer robot to aim and fire a vaporization beam. ^FtM
  
• Can travel to a point in time and space selected by an actual phone number in use at the time. ^CS1E8
  
• Can travel to a different point in space without changing time. ^CS2E8
  
• Elizabeth and Joanna apparently use the booth to travel to alternate timelines, though this mostly happens off screen. ^FtM
  
• Can travel to alternate dimensions entirely. ^M#10
  
• Travels to heaven. ^M#11
  
  • And hell. ^BV2#1
• Teleports from heaven to the earthly timeline, all the way to the Boomerang Nebula, and back in a matter of seconds. ^BV2#4
  
• Using the infinity button, allows the occupants to be multiplied infinitely to interact with all points in space and time simultaneously. ^FtM
  
• The booth can't travel if all of the circuits of time are currently occupied. ^CS2E5
  
• Travelers through the circuits of time can see other travelers in the same area. ^M#2
  
• The booth can seemingly track individuals in a specific time frame as shown by the fact that the future Bill and Ted were able to trick Bill and Ted into thinking they were rich and successful by being in the right place at the right time. ^FtM
  
• Rufus gives Bill and Ted a new booth that can trace the calls of other booths, though it tends to show up a little late. Also it's a rotary phone. ^M#2
  
• Rufus gives Bill a mobile phone which can call back the booth with the correct number. The first time its used however, it calls Doc Brown's Delorean instead. ^EHA92
  
  • Shown here actually working. ^EHA96
• When Ted uses a magazine to try and fix the antennae Bill and Ted end up going inside of the world of the magazine by accident. ^LAE1
  
  • By connecting the booth to a cable box, they're able to enter the worlds of television broadcasts, though it's entirely dependent on what the tv is currently turned to. ^LAE3

The Squint System
An upgraded directory that allows the booth to travel to fictional settings, including books, CDs, movies, and games. ^CS2E2

• Use the booth to enter an episode of Leave It to Badger. ^CS2E4
  
  • Can also use the booth to skip around within the episode. ^CS2E4
  • Once the episode ends, every person in it, including Bill and Ted, disappear. It looks like this. ^CS2E4
  • Foreign objects can persist between episodes, if they're plot relevant. ^CS2E4
• Can bring characters from the fictional world to the real world. ^CS2E4
  
• Characters in the fictional world are fully aware that they're fictional. ^CS2E4
  
• Altering the interior of the fiction does change how the fiction appears in the real world. Also might cause that fiction to become unavoidable? ^CS2E4
  
• Showing places that aren't supposed to be there reveals static. ^CS2E4
  
• Shrinks Bill and Ted down to smaller than a bottlecap when they forget to put the 1 in front. To reverse this effect, they simply dial 9. ^CS2E2
  

Durability

• [Limitation] When the booth's antennae get smashed by a knight's flail it can still travel fine but where and when it lands becomes uncontrollable. ^EA
  
  • [Limitation] A thrown frisbee knocks out the antennae, preventing the booth from time travelling. Ted is able to partially fix this with a magazine and a shoelace, though it causes the jumps to become uncontrollable again. ^LAE1
• Crash lands upside down and works perfectly fine. ^CS1E2
  
  • Tears through the roof of a tent, crash lands upside-down, and then falls onto its side. ^CS1E5
• Slides along the ground, crashing into a horse hard enough to launch it into the air, taking no damage. ^CS1E2
  
• Gets knocked off a crow's nest with a cannonball and tumbles to the deck of the ship without damage. ^CS1E4
  
• Gets run over by a train. ^CS1E8
  
• Tanks a fall from the top of Big Ben's clock face. ^CS1E8
  
• In a cabin as its demolished by a cannon, and protects the people within. ^CS1E9
  
• Smashes up the wooden walls of a log flume. ^CS1E11
  
• Takes several blasts of energy weapon fire and isn't damaged until one hits the antennae. ^LAE4
  
• Gets shot up by Billted 1.0's machine gun arm and has enough in it to make a trip before collapsing. ^BV1#4
  
• Vlad the Impaler has trouble breaking the glass with the hilt of his sword. ^BV3#1
  
• [Limitation] The floor breaks falling onto a bear's head. ^CS1E13
  
• [Limitation] Destroyed by a large boulder falling on it. ^BV2#3
  

Landing Strength

• [Limitation] While operating normally, it doesn't land hard enough to seriously harm an old man. ^CS1E5
  
  • But it did harm this guy. ^LAE1
• While malfunctioning however, digs a hole into the earth in a second. ^CS1E5
  
• Still while malfunctioning, crashes up through some wooden floorboards, knocking aside a dresser. ^CS1E5
  
• Demolishes a small kennel. ^CS1E6
  
• Smashes through a thick wooden roof. ^CS1E10
  
• Smashes through the deck of a ship. ^CS2E3
  
• Sends Columbus ricocheting around the Santa Maria. ^CS2E5
  
• Sends two cowboys a distance away flying from the shockwave. ^EHA92
  
• Smashes Billted 1.0 which is capable of flying straight through walls and windows without damage. ^BV1#3
  
• While malfunctioning, lands hard enough to crater concrete. ^BV1#4
  
• Smooshes a pair of demon spawn. ^BV2#4
  

Other

• Can still make a trip while on its side and is able to land normally. ^CS1E11
  
• It also works while water-logged. ^CS1E1
  
• Sideways AND waterlogged. ^S1E12
  
• It hovers in the air for unsaid reasons while malfunctioning. ^CS1E4
  
• Has some video recording and playback functions, though seemingly a preset one for display purposes. ^FtM
  
• When their regular booth gets blown up, Rufus lets them use a payphone on a stand to much the same effect. ^EHA02
  
• Can sometimes require coins to make calls with. ^NES
  
• It can also make regular calls. ^EA
  

"Catch ya later Bill and Ted!"

I won’t make this too long winded. My wife and I currently have a 3-year old purebred dog (female) that we got as a puppy and raised her up, trained her, the whole 9. She’s amazingly well behaved, quite smart, and very loving. Not to mention spoiled.
One of our neighbors is considering rehoming their dog, also a female. We and our dog know this other dog pretty well. She was a rescue and has been with her current family for a year or so. They’re older and just can’t really give her what she needs. She has a couple minor behavioral things, like leash tugging, lunging, etc, but otherwise seems to be a good girl.
Our dog has had plenty of playtime with the other dog, as they see each other several times per week at the dog park. They really seem to love each other and are always excited to see each other. They play well together, albeit sometimes a little rough.
The biggest issue for us is, how will our very spoiled girl will react to a new four-legged face in the home? We’d like to do a trial run to see how they get along first, obviously. Also, we’re moving in a couple of months and would want to wait until we’re into the new place before we add the stress of the second dog to the mix. We’d be going from an apartment to a home with a fenced yard, hopefully.
Any thoughts? Similar experiences?

I'm not sure if this is the right place for this, but, well, where else do I put it?
Background: My dad (as well as me and my entire family) are Christians. My dad and I aren't sure what we think of paranormal activities, though, like ghosts and the like. My grandfather on my mom's side has had a few encounters with a ghost, but that's a different story. I personally believe in spirits and fae and the like, and I think he's leaning towards it too. This is actually the story that made me believe, I suppose. My dad and his friend (the two main characters of the story) are both former police officers, and were both -at least at the time- very skeptical of ghosts and such. I've never heard the friend's view of the story, as I've just never thought to ask when we do see him. This was almost twenty years ago, but the details are surprisingly clear; my dad's has only told this story a few times, but the details have never changed. He elaborated on some of them a little more as I got older, but that's about it.
Sorry for the long background, into the story!
My dad and his friend were working night shift as security at a mine in Northern Kentucky. They were at their post, which was a hill overlooking the entrance to the mine to the left and the owner's house and a lake to the right. They were just talking while they kept watch, when they both just went quiet. They were both facing towards the lake, and there was a figure standing on the bank.
The lake was surrounded by woods, because rural Kentucky, and the figure was standing just inside the tree line. All they saw of it was an outline. It looked, according to Dad, like a man with antlers, about his height (he's about average height).
Dad told me that he felt all the hair on his body stand on end, but he wasn't scared. His body was scared, but his mind wasn't. He was perfectly calm.
They were both armed, but neither of them raised their guns. Like I said, they weren't scared- or at least my dad wasn't. Not at the time, at least; they were both terrified later, but they were just perfectly calm then.
They just kind of looked at it. He knew it was looking at them, even though he could only see an outline of it.
Then, after a while, it turned and walked away into the woods.
Dad knew where it was going. The mine was built extremely close to a Native American burial site (he didn't know the name of the tribe, and we couldn't find any records of it online, but he remembers that it had at least two tribes buried there, small ones), and he just knew it was following the path to the burial site.
I asked him how he knew when he was telling me this story, and he said "Because I've walked that path."
They never saw the creature again, as far as I know, but Dad had an encounter with it later that I'll also include. It took my dad -who's the bravest man I've ever met- a couple hours to go back to that spot, and only in the daylight. He was too scared. And remember, they were both big, tough guys, former police officers who risked their lives every day. He'd faced down people double or triple his size, who could kill him if they wanted to, but he'd earned the respect of almost every inmate in that prison. He wasn't scared by much. But he was scared after that.
They went down to the spot where they'd seen the creature standing the next morning, poking around to see if they could find a trace of it. They were armed, as usual, ready to shoot it if they had to. They didn't see the creature, but what they did find was a massive hole, about two or three feet deep, right where it must've been standing. My dad stepped in the hole, for reference of how big this thing was; it had looked about his size, as mentioned above, but this hole was easily two or three feet deep, and it made my dad look like a child.
He climbed out of the hole, and they looked at each other. He told me then that, whatever that creature was, it was a lot bigger than it had looked. Eight or nine feet tall, he estimated.
Now, for the second bit! There was a group of kids -my dad referred to them as kids, in reality they were in their late teens to early twenties- who would take four wheelers out in the woods near the burial site mentioned earlier. This was completely illegal, for a variety of reasons, and there was a fence of some kind to keep people from doing exactly this.
Well, the "kids" were at it again, and they'd broken the fence. The owner called up my dad and asked him to fix it, which he agreed to.
So, he headed out down the path, the same one he'd seen the creature take, to the burial site. And the entire time, he felt like he was being watched. Not by a person, or something with malicious intent; my dad did a lot of hunting as a kid, and he knew what being watched by a predator felt like. It wasn't like that. He just knew it was the creature from before. And he just knew what it wanted, somehow.
He said "Look, I'm not here to mess with anything. I'm here to protect this place."
He never felt it again. He'd been down there a few times since, but he never felt it again.
Now, I'm a huge mythology nerd, and we have some Cherokee heritage so that was one of the things I looked into, a lot. Originally when he told me the story, he said he thought the creature was a wendigo (He thought a wendigo was a creature that shamans would summon to destroy their enemies; he'd seen pictures and heard about what they looked like and what they did, but didn't actually know the stories behind its existence). We quickly ruled out wendigo, though, because there was no way it wouldn't have attacked him the second time. Wendigos don't care what you're there for, they're spirits of hunger that just want to kill and eat. Nothing more.
So, my current theory is that it's some kind of protector spirit for the tribe buried there. It recognized that my dad wasn't there to do any sort of harm to the burial site, and left him alone. If it was a wendigo, it would've just eaten him, and I wouldn't be here to tell this.
I was wondering if anyone has any similar stories about this kind of thing, or any other ideas about what it was.

FYI, this is a story COLLECTION. Lots of standalones technically. So, you can basically start to read at any chapter, no pre-read of the other chapters needed technically (other than maybe getting better descriptions of characters than: Adam Vir=human, Krill=antlike alien, Sunny=tall alien, Conn=telepathic alien). The numbers are (mostly) only for organization of posts and continuity.
OC Written by Charlie Stastarrfallknightrise,
Typed up and then posted here by me.
Proofreading and language check for some chapters by u/Finbar9800
Future Lore and fact check done by me.
Damn! The last LFIL chapter a while ago had a pretty legendary photograph moment, but this one tops it by far!
Previous First [Next](link)
Want to find a specific one, see the whole list or check fanart?
Here is the link to the master-post.
"Please everyone, calm yourselves. The Galactic Assembly is addressing the issue as we speak."
The crowd roiled and churned like the bubbles in a pot of boiling water. Flags waved and voices rose high into the air.
The chanting increased in fervor.
"Please!"
The Rundi struggled to raise his voice high enough to be heard over the crowd, who only grew with strength and intensity.
Commander Vir keyed his mic,
"Delta units to the GA side of the crowd, some of these protesters are looking extremely agitated. Let's make sure they don't do anything we're all going to regret.”
He stood with his back to the GA chambers, its wide arching courtyard devoid of life, except for those unfortunate Rundi ordered to carry messages from one side of the compound to the other, otherwise they tried to keep their distance from the front facade of the building and the churning mass of protesters.
White flags waved and fluttered.
Commander Vir held the energy shield with one arm, pressing it back firmly against the crowd, so they could not pass the dedicated marking point.
"Commander, the crowd over here is getting violent."
He grimaced and reached a hand down to open the line,
"Stun them and let them calm down, do NOT catch anyone else in the crossfire. We do not want this escalating."
"Yes sir."
Something pushed against his shield and he grunted, pushing back.
The white bandanna on his arm was pressed against the clear blue force field and helped to at least confuse the crowd before them.
And luckily, they would be kept too confused to get violent.
The aliens among the human protesters helped as well.
If this was on earth, things would have broken out into a riot by now, but the Drev the Tesraki and the Finnari tended to be more levelheaded when it came to these kinds of things, and they managed to reign in their humans from doing something stupid.
He closed his eyes tight for a second, praying that the GA would rethink their position.
It hurt him to watch these people struggle like this.
It just felt so strange that anyone should be here in the first place.
Beside him, Sunny had taken control of two young humans who were getting a bit more than rowdy,
"Let’s keep this a protest, and not a riot."
She growled, giving them a look that would have made anyone quell in their boots. It sort of made him half smile, Sunny was such a badass, he wanted to be more like her when he eventually grew up.
His thoughts were cut off, as the crowd churned a bit, pressing into his shield.
He keyed his mic again, prepared to go over the loudspeaker and tell them that if they didn't calm down he was going to turn this protest into a mass nap time.
He had the power to do that if things got out of hand, though he honestly didn't want to.
The GA needed to see this.
He was so preoccupied with the crowd, that he barely noticed as the Rundi ran up from the inside of the compound, flying forward on its long spindly legs.
It stopped by the first Rundi to say something, and the conversation that passed between them didn't look particularly encouraging.
HIs heart sank into his stomach.
He felt... Surprisingly disappointed, very sad for all those people who were going to get their day ruined.
The Rundi waffled around at the front of the crowd for a bit before turning and looking over to where he stood.
Oh great.
The Rundi walked over, and he backed off from the crowd, allowing Sunny to take a step in his place with her shield at the ready.
The people looked as if they were about to start something, but seeing her expression, they decided not to.
He dropped his shield and lowered his head to hear the Rundi over the roaring of the crowd.
"The GA is not budging."
The Rundi whispered,
"They are asking the protesters to leave."
Adam growled in frustration.
Behind him someone in the crowd pointed at him,
"They're saying no aren't they!?”
Others took up the call, and soon enough the rest of the crowd had been alerted. Adam was forced to run back to support Sunny, as everything suddenly grew more intense.
Fights were breaking out on the left and the right.
People were hitting the ground as the guards were forced to stun them.
That only agitated the rest of the crowd who also began to buck and fight.
Adam keyed the mic for real this time, filling the intervening space with his booming voice,
”ALL OF YOU KNOCK IT OFF RIGHT NOW OR I WILL STUN YOU ALL."
The aggression in the crowd died down, though the anger remained sizzling at the surface.
Overhead clouds passed over the sun, before him the crowd roared like a wave, and behind him the GA council chambers were as silent as a ghost town.
"LISTEN, QUIET DOWN ALL OF YOU."
It sort of felt as if he was floating.
The world around him hardly seemed real though that was not the best way to explain it.
The crowd died down a bit,
"You may not understand this! And I have said it before, but these are not humans. Protests don't work on them. When they see a group of angry humans, they get scared and when they get scared, they double down even further. I know it does not make any sense to you NOT to protest for what you believe in, but if you are going to do this, you MUST remain civil. Even now the GA is frightened by you. They don't believe you are rational, and they are not going to listen to you if this keeps up."
The crowd had quieted down to a milling sort of confusion.
"Then what should we do!"*
The shouting came from somewhere and in anger, though he couldn't pinpoint the source.
In frustration he nudged Sunny, and she allowed him to climb on her back as he had before.
The crowd could see him now, and he could see them for the most part.
He waved them down trying to cut off the others who had taken up the chant.
"I understand what you are trying to do, and I support your efforts, but you are only hurting ourselves. The GA can only be won by rational discussion."
"The GA won't see any of our representatives. They are debating only on their own facts and opinions."
One of the crowd's people snarled. The call was echoed and Adam stared at them in shock,
"Wait what!? Are you serious?”
There was a muttering throughout the crowd.
"For fuck's sake."
He muttered under his breath,
"The Rudi think none of us are high ranking enough to be allowed into the council chambers, and none of the representatives will take up our cause. The human ambassador thinks we are disgusting, so she won't do anything and says she won’t represent our minority."
The muttering through the crowd grew louder.
Adam looked around, head turning to see all the angry faces, blushed with red, or streaked with tears.
These people were frustrated, and hurt, and he understood why.
This wasn't right!
He closed his eyes again and took another deep breath.
What was he thinking!?
He stepped down from Sunny's back and walked over to one of the protestors in the front row, pointing to his large flag on a pole that was about eight feet tall.
"May I borrow your flag?"
The protester stared on at him in confusion,
"What, why?"
"Because, I am going to give you the representative you need."
[…]
Commander Vir and Sunny walked alone down the length of the GA outer courtyard.
A billowing white flag streamed lazily over his head, suspended there by way of the pole which rested heavily on his shoulder. The white of the fabric had been marred now by many colors as hundreds of rushed signatures had been scrawled on its face.
He was armed with the backing of a thousand protesters, a hundred signatures, and more than a few dozen stories.
Sunny turned her head to look at him, and he fancied that maybe he saw an expression of pride in her eyes, though she didn't say much except,
"Pretty brave."
He didn't feel very brave, and as they walked through the front doors of the GA atrium, his hand was shaking against the cold metal of the flagpole.
He was stopped by a pair of Rundi guards on his way into the chamber, but was let in after they recognized who he was.
He could hear voices up ahead, and the sounds of the protest going on outside had all but died away,
"They have proven that they cannot be civil, and based on the humanizing effect, we can assume they will do similar things to any non-human lifeform that they encounter."
"I may not agree with their decision counselor, but that sounds like your prejudice against humans is seeping through."
There was an uproar in the council chamber.
He paused for a moment, staying with Sunny just out of line of sight and took a deep breath.
She lay a hand on his shoulder.
"Here goes nothing."
He muttered, before stepping his way out onto the GA floor.
At first no one noticed his presence as he made his slow way into the center of the circle, but his large, white flag soon changed that.
The council chambers went silent.
The chairwoman stood,
"Commander, what are you doing here. Shouldn't you be taking care of the protesters?”
His lips drew into a thing line,
"With all due respect councilwoman, I am."
He rammed the flagpole against the stone, sending a loud cracking sound out and around the wide atrium silencing the council,
"I have been made aware that you refuse to see their representatives based on a ranking issue, well I assume my rank is high enough."
The Human rep leaned forward,
"Commander, this is not your place!”
He shot her a look,
"Then whose place is it counselor? I heard a certain democratic counselor refuses to speak for them because they are and I quote “a too small and insignificant minority”…”
He turned his head in a wide arc at the watching crowd,
"Counselors, you have known me, longer than you have known any human currently in this galaxy. You understand that I know your rules and your customs. You understand that I have only ever striven to protect and uphold the GA and the planet's it encompasses. I have thwarted wars, signed treaties, and broken my own body for your best interests."
There was silence about the room.
"Will you let me speak now, with the understanding that my loyalty has never wavered from you, and never will?”
The silence continued.
Aliens understood the power of human loyalty.
Or at least they should…
The chairwoman took a seat,
"Very well, commander."
He lifted his head, feeling his heart slow as he took a few deep breaths. There was a muscle in his face that had begun to twitch, like it always did if he was extremely angry or nervous, but he held it down,
"I understand you are frightened, and I understand that you are confused, but I want you to know first of all that those people outside are good average people. They don't mean you any harm. They are hurting, and they are afraid for themselves, and they are trying to get your attention. Historically, humanity has used protests to right the injustices of government to combat prejudices brought on by one's sex or the color of their skin. You must understand that they see this as an impingement on their happiness and a decision made out of line."
There was a murmur around the room.
"So, I ask you now, that I may, perhaps, answer your questions and ease your worries. Why are you so against them?"
"It's unnatural."
It was the Bran representative that had spoken, and he did it quite emphatically.
"Why?"
The commander asked,
"Because they aren't even the same species."
"So?"
The Bran seemed caught off guard,
"They... It's not natural. They can't reproduce, so it isn't... A thing that should be done."
The commander shrugged,
"So if one can't reproduce then they aren't natural? I see a couple issues in that logic relating to prejudices against people with infertility."
There was a murmur around the room.
"So, they can't reproduce, so what? You know who we can reproduce with though... Adaptids."
There was a sort of hushed exclamation form around the room.
The commander shrugged,
"They can't have kids.... Hardly a good enough argument to bring to the floor of a government discussion."
"What he is trying to say is that this practice equates itself to bestiality. It is utterly disguting!"
It was the human representative this time, and she stared at him with her eyes narrowed in anger.
He kept his cool, though he very much did not like her.
"That is absolutely disgusting and wildly insulting of you because that implies that one or both parties are no better than animals, beasts as you will."
The room was silent,
"So which one is it, are humans animals, counselor, are the Finnari or the Rundi animals?"
He turned to the Drev counselor,
"Are the Drev just dumb animals that have no understanding, and no decision making abilities?”
The Drev representative stood, angrily cracking his spear against the stone,
"We are most certainly not!"
The commander held up his hands,
"Then what is so bestial about it? Bestiality is absolutely disgusting because you are taking advantages of a creature that can neither understand nor protect itself from what you are doing. It cannot say yes, and it cannot say no. It has no greater understanding than that of a child, and so cannot make its own decisions."
He looked towards the Finnari representative,
"Tell me counselor, is your species a species of children, with no greater concept of their own decision making?”
"Of course not. Why would you even imply such a thing!?”
"I imply nothing, counselor. This is what YOU imply with your decision. So far we have established that all parties are intelligent consenting creatures, and none of you have managed to give me an actually good reason for banning the practice."
The floor was growing more agitated.
"They will be a poor example for the rest of the galaxy. If we make it legal others will surely follow."
Adam turned his eyes on the speaker, an Iotin,
"You're worried that they are going to turn the rest of the galaxy extrial?"
He laughed,
"That is a poor argument which is not only selfish, but foolish. People should be allowed to make their own decisions. And assuming you are right, what then? Oh no... There are a few more extrials... And it does... What exactly?"
He turned in a wide circle,
"If you are worried about population growth or in this case population falloff due to this issue then you should be reminded that extrials comprise a percentage of the human population so small that I could fit the greater majority of them on my ship comfortably. This occurrence is not common, and even if the numbers were to rise, it would not be of enough significance to cause issues."
His heart was hammering hard inside his chest. He felt like he was doing alright, but that might mean nothing.
"In any event, these relationships do not affect the vast majority of the galaxy. Humans cannot be with the Bran or the Rundi due to the water we shed from our skin. The Gromm and the Iotins are out for similar reasons. Vrul and Gibb are incapable of having feelings for humans in that way as far as we know, and both the Tvek and the Celzex are too different from humans for either party to be interested."
He walked around in a circle, allowing the flag to trail behind him,
"Furthermore, the humanization phenomenon happens with or without romantic intent, and as it is, its mention is more a mark of prejudice on humans than it is an argument against the two groups being together."
He left the floor open for a little while, as the council muttered with each other.
Finally, the Drev representative stood,
"My species culture and our way of life has been upturned by the GA. I fear relationships with humans will result in the loss of our culture. We have already strayed far from what we originally were. We are hardly recognizable as Drev anymore."
The commander let his voice soften,
"I understand that the Drev have lost a lot in joining this..."
Sunny held up a hand, and in surprise he was cut off.
She took the floor,
"Your Glory…"
She said bowing her head,
"If you would have truly upheld those ideals, you would not be sitting on this council."
The Drev pulled back in surprise at her words,
"Yes, we lost a lot in joining the GA, and after the war, but I would argue that some of that was for good. Before the GA people like me, with perceived imperfection were cast into the fire and perceived as no better than animals. This practice still takes place on our planet, where these traditions are still alive and well."
Her words made the room shift nervously,
"However, culture changes and adapts, and it must to survive. We changed in order to live among the GA. We found other alternatives to fighting that still maintain our honor and our prowess in war, and this includes the sports that the humans have brought to us. Furthermore, the vast majority of the Drev I see who are with humans are those of us who would not be accepted by our own kind, perceived as ugly or malformed. If this is the case then your traditions remain sound, and those like me are removed from the mating population."
The counselor almost looked ashamed at her words, turning his head away so as not to look her in the eyes.
"As far as a change of culture goes, it was bound to happen, and it seems you are more worried about change than you actually are about human Drev relationships."
She went quiet, and Adam nodded to her taking the floor again.
A Finnari counselor stood,
"I am simply worried about our birth rate. The Finnari were farmed by the Gnarlak for many years, and we are only now replenishing our population."
"I don't think you need to worry. The amount of actual relationships is so small that it will not affect the Finnari population in any significant manner."
The representative sat back down with no real argument to combat him.
The chairwoman stood,
"Your arguments have been heard commander, though, what the others do not mention is the issue of disease. We have seen a great increase of illness transmissible from humans to non humans and-"
"I hate to cut you off chairwoman, but that is NOT related to interspecies relationships, but instead has another simple explanation: the rise in human tourism."
She paused,
"Explain."
"You all know very well that humans are not allowed to leave their planet unless they are tested for all communicable non-treatable diseases. This means that those of us that you see here cannot physically pass our diseases off onto other people, except for the germs that are found naturally on our skin. In this case these issues did not stem from relationships at all, but poor vaccination, the poor regulation of tourism, and allowing aliens to travel onto earth where infected humans are located and not testing them as they leave."
He looked on at them pleadingly,
"You see. You don't even have problems with them, but you are using them as a real scapegoat for the actual issues. And I am here to tell you that, in fact you are causing more problems by banning this! The more you push, the harder they will push back, and eventually someone is going to get hurt, because they are not allowed to be together legally, they do it illegally, and because they do it illegally, they end up in dangerous places exposed to greater rates of crime. They get hurt, and they get involved in things they would otherwise not have gotten involved in if you had not banned it. Just look at Noctoplis. It has the highest rate of extrials living there and the lowest policing force and the most corrupted system. There are no legitimate jobs there, so we see an influx of crime by desperate people who won't be accepted anywhere else. Not to mention that it increased the depression rates, which increases suicide rates. Your laws have ostracized them, forced them to become criminals, and turned many of them to think that killing themselves is better than living in a world where they are seen as disgusting when they don't actually do any real harm."
He had to take a deep breath,
"Earth has seen all of this before, and one way or another, eventually someone will see what I am trying to say."
He rested the flag on the floor beside him, feet planted at shoulder width.
"I hope that this rational conversation will allow a more open mind on the council. I encourage you to talk to their representatives. They are more rational and educated than I am, and they can give you hard facts and statistics. But please, they don't want to cause trouble, if you allow them to do as they will, you might find these problems going away for you."
The human representative clearly did not seem convinced, but he didn't expect to convince her, he expected to convince the others who were more afraid than they were prejudiced.
"It seems as if we have some other potential policies to discuss, commander."
The chairwoman said, tapping her fingers on the table before her.
"I have a suggestion, ma'am."
"And that is?"
"A temporary revocation on the ban, that way you can SEE what the universe will be like without it, and you can judge for yourself whether The ban does any good. You don't have to overturn the law just yet, but temporarily suspend it, that way you can re institute at any time. Then you will have concrete proof. You can do testing, and polls and whatever else, then you would know for sure."
His suggestion turned into a discussion, that dragged on for many minutes before the chairwoman raised her hand,
"It has been decided, all in favor of this temporary proposal please indicate."
The voting lights flashed above them.
Commander Vir waited with baited breath.
[…]
He walked from the venue, hours after he had entered, totally tired and exhausted.
The flag felt heavy in his hands and his boots thudded with exhaustion on the white marble below him.
Outside, the protest field was surprisingly silent, though he could still see their flags.
As he walked closer, he could see that the vast majority of the crowd was sitting down.
Their voices reached him from a distance at first, until he realized they were calmly singing with each other.
Waiting for his verdict.
Suddenly the first people from the crowd noticed the two silhouettes coming from the chambers towards them.
A lone man and Drev were walking from the building.
The man was wearing riot gear, a full helmet, a shield, and carrying their flag, resting against his right shoulder.
The group of them began to stand, rising to their feet and yelling.
Pointing in his direction.
They quieted as he got closer.
"What did they say!? What did they say!?”
He stayed quiet, holding a hand in the air to silence them.
He passed the flag to the original protester who looked on at him with such an expression of pleading that he felt his eyes tingle a bit with rising emotion.
He had to look away, boosting himself onto Sunny's back, keying his mic.
The crowd was silent.
A thousand eyes fixed on one human and one Drev.
"I spoke to the GA."
They waited on tenterhooks,
"And after a long debate, and a slim majority the GA have decided..."
Flags whipped in the wind,
"To temporarily revoke the ban on inter-species relationships until a-"
He didn't get to finish his sentence, drowned out by a powerful wave of noise and joy so overwhelming that he was nearly knocked backwards off his feet.
The crowd surged forward, and Sunny staggered as the group surrounded them, pressing inward and upwards.
Adam found himself on the ground on his feet, packed in by bodies enclosed by hundreds of pairs of arms, which slapped on the shoulder and the arm, as every person tried their best to get one hand on him.
The flag from earlier was ripped off its stand and pressed into his hands.
He was deafened by cheering and an outpouring of gratitude so profound he had simply never experienced such emotion.
He looked up at Sunny, pressed in with him by the enthusiastic crowd.
And she nodded her head in approval.
He grinned.
He had to admit.
This felt pretty good.
Though, whether it was all over was a question for another time.
Previous First [Next](link)
Want to find a specific one, see the whole list or check fanart?
Here is the link to the master-post.
Intro post by me
OC-whole collection
Patreon of the author
Thanks for reading! As you saw in the title, this is a cross posted story written by starrfallknightrise and I'll just upload some of it here for you guys, if you are interested and want to read ahead, the original story-collection can be found on tumblr or wattpad to read for free. (link above this text under "OC:..." ) It is the Empyrean Iris story collection by starfallknightrise. Also, if you want to know more about the story collection i made an intro post about it, so feel free to check that out to see what other great characters to look forward to! (Link also above this text). I have no affiliations to the author; just thought I’d share some of the great stories you might enjoy a lot!
Obviously, I have Charlie’s permission to post this and for the people already knowing the stories, or starting to read them: If you follow the link and check out the story you will see some differences. I made some small (non-artistic) changes, mainly correcting writing mistakes, pronoun correction and some small additional info here and there of things which were not thought of/forgotten or even were added/changed in later stories (like the “USS->UNSC” prefix of Stabby, Chalar=/->Sunny etc). As well as some "biggemajor" changes in descriptions and info’s for the same stringency/continuity reason. That can be explained by the story collection being, well a story collection at the start with many standalone-stories just starring the same people, but later on it gets more to a stringent storyline with backstories and throwbacks. (For example Adam Vir has some HEAVY scars over his body, following his bones, which were not really talked about up till half the collection, where it says it covers his whole body and you find out via backflash that he had them the whole time and how he got them, they just weren't mentioned before. However, I would think a doctor would at least see these scars before that, especially since he gets analyzed, treated and goes shirtless/in T-shirts in some stories). So TLDR: Writing and some descriptions are slightly changed, with full OK from the author, since he himself did not bother to correct these things before.

Its a good job, dont get me wrong, pays over $15 over the average for what it is and gives amazingly benefits that most places straight up do not give. My coworkers are great, my bosses are great. Issue is, its a restaurant facing kitchen in a rich side of town. People go on dates there a lot, and i watch as couples of all ages kiss and feel each other up. I watch as happy families get together to eat, i watch beautiful women come in by the hundreds, who i cant even really look at. I work with a lot of women who i consider attractive and although i can easily have conversations with them for a long time, none of them are ever single. Like i swear if your BMI is under 25 you just wont be single for longer than a week as a woman. And if they are, i usually hear they are sleeping with some taller attractive guy at the bar or some shit. In other words, shes single for those dudes. Im sure they are out there, but i havent ever met them. Even the most awkward, dog trash at conversations woman ive met, has a boyfriend.
I also talk to a lot of successful people and it really makes me think. Do i provide enough to even ask for a relationship. Like seriously, obviously my looks are very subpar we get it but as a guy i can tip the scales a bit. Even with making more money than average in my job, i am still barely above poverty line in this city and thats with managing my money well, investing in high yield stocks, having side hustles and living frugally. If i was in a relationship with a woman, and say she got pregnant, could i provide? In this economy? No. It makes me feel like a failure of a man. Not only that, i look at how i dress and its just stupid. I can never figure out how to dress myself and its always been a struggle. The guys i regularly talk to at these places all dress very nicely. They have money for nice clothes, their mental health is, at least on the outside, great. They are physically healthy and fit. Working at this place and comparing myself to all these people really drains on me, and makes me angry. Its a reminder that due to my genetics what i have to do to compete is like a 15 point list and even then, im not getting younger.
Yesterday it was bad, but not unlike any other day, and leaving work i could feel my anger and stress go down, despite nothing bad happening at that job. The only thing that happened was i watched couples and successful people and women i could never be with, for over ten hours. I went to go and work on one of my hobbies and it felt like feeling the stress and just raw fury melt out of me, all the way to my feet. I seriously hate looking at these people and do my best to ignore their happy lives. I dont want to quit this job but i might have to because it is destroying my mental health since its making me look at the average to above average in my city. And realizing how far i dont rank up.

The scene faded back in to a shot of some treetops, Sammy saying "Well, even though we didn't finish, I'm glad I didn't get targeted," as the camera panned down to the Rats walking through the woods. "It was bad enough watching Leshawna and DJ go through it."
"Girl, you can't let that stuff get to you," Leshawna told her, the two girls walking at the front of their team's pack. "Sure it's humiliating, but it'll pass in time. Besides, it's not like any of us would've held your secrets against you, not when my secret was revealed."
"I hadn't thought of that," Sammy said with a contemplative look.
"We can't let our fears control us. It'll just prevent us from achieving what we want to do," Sierra told her team while focusing on her phone. She tripped on a rock and landed on her face as a result.
Confessional: Sammy
"Back home, there's this girl who's basically the princess of my school," Sammy exclaimed. "She leaks out the students' personal secrets just to get even with them or simply be mean," she gulped, "and when one of my own secrets got posted, I was teased for a week."
"Thankfully, my friends didn't bother me about it and still continued to hang out with me."
Confessional Ends
The scene cut back to the Maggots, also walking through the woods together, and focused on Anne Maria and Katie at the middle of their pack.
"This is the longest I've ever gone without using an electronic," Katie droned. "How am I gonna talk to my viewers about my day and give them advice?"
"You don't need to be on a device 24/7," Anne Maria spoke to the girl.
"Easy for you to say," Katie said snottily. "You don't have to worry about vlogs since you focus on maintaining your hair."
"Ya think that's easy?" Anne Maria retorted calmly. "I have to work overtime at a diner just to buy all the hairspray that I can afford."
Confessional: Katie
"Maybe I could've been nicer there," Katie admitted, "but my subscribers can go down if I don't upload anything."
Confessional Ends
The shot cut ahead to Scarlett and Molly, the former looking like she's been listening to the conversation behind her. "Chris has created a disadvantage for us by taking away Katie's gadget right before the game!"
"True, but Chris thankfully had the decency to end the challenge before he could reveal any more of our embarrassments," Molly said.
"The host just thrives off our pain and suffering," Scarlett summarized.
"You can say that again," Molly told her. "Sociopathy is something that could be cured, but Chris is way long gone."
\
"Welcome, players!" Chris announced over the loudspeaker again, the camera cutting down to ground level to show the Rats meeting up with the Maggots again. "Now that you're all here, it's time for part two of today's challenge," the host continued, the shot zooming out to show all thirteen campers standing in some sort of wide field of mud with a wooden ramp leading up off-camera on the right.
"The 'Mad Skills Obstacle Course'," Chris announced, the shot cutting to him standing on some patch of grass.
"The relay race begins with a mad dash from the Kick Start," the shot cut to the wooden platform at the other end of the ramp, where an absurdly large rubber root was connected by wooden shaft and gear to a pole sticking up out of the platform. "Forget coffee," the host said as the boot swung squeakily back and forth in demonstration, "if this baby doesn't get you goin', nothin' will."
"Then it's off to the race against time that is the Cannonball Run," Chris said, the camera following his motion further onward to another stretch of wooden platform. Several cannons situated below suddenly blew gaping holes in it, and the shot zoomed out to show several more cannons hooked up to a scaffold over the platform and aimed downward.
"Over to my personal fave," the shot moved to the end of the platform where a log had been set up to rotate on its side, "Wrecking Ball Alley! Hurts so good," he said as the camera panned across and the titular wrecking ball swung down over the rolling log.
"And moving on," the shot cut next to a few higher, disconnected, and generally precarious platforms, "we head to the Gang Plank, complete with rabid mutant beavers." The shot cut to the mud pit at the bottom where two giant wooly beavers with boney spikes along their back were busily chewing through the poles the gang plank platforms were on.
"Followed by," the shot cut to a close-up of a large, red, butt-shaped apparatus that was moving up and down, "the bouncy agony of Double Trouble." The shot zoomed out to show four of the butt-shaped things moving up and down between two platforms.
"And finally," Chris said, "the Grand Slam," the shot cut to several giant baseball bats sticking up out of the mud surrounding an equally giant baseball mitt, "where you'll use ropes to swing into the giant baseball mitt, while avoiding those deadly bats." The shot zoomed in on the mitt, then panned over to one of the bats as a small red bird flew head-first into it, knocking it out with a clonk. "Piece of cake," Chris said with a chuckle as the shot cut back to the staring and nervous campers.
"Oh, and as you may remember," the host added, "I said that the winning team from part one would have a distinct advantage in part two?"
"But there was no winner!" Sierra reminded the host. "You canceled the first part!"
"Yeah, don't remind me," Chris answered in annoyance. "The losing team was gonna wear snazzy specs while competing," he explained with a chipper smile, "but since we never actually finished the competition," he became annoyed again, "I've decided that everybody has to wear them!" He laughed, and the campers looked behind them to see Chef Hatchet holding a cardboard box.
Dave was the first to step forward, taking out one of the pairs of glasses – thick, ugly things that almost seemed to have a greenish tint to them – and put them on. His brow shot up immediately. "Hey, what's with the old glasses?" he asked. "We won't be able to see anything wearing these!" The perspective shifted to demonstrate what he was seeing, which was little more than an incredibly blurry shot of the forest and some unknown body of water.
"Dorktacular goggles won't make part two easy," Chris said, "or attractive," he shrugged, "but it can be done. In theory."
The campers groaned.
"Since the Maggots have one more player than the Rats," Chris added on, "one of them has to sit this one out."
"It should be Katie," Scarlett suggested to her team, "She's still suffering from her tech withdrawal."
"Fine by me," Molly boldly said. "I don't want her losing for us."
"Competitors, take your positions!" he said, and the footage flashed forward to show Anne Maria and Geoff together near the edge of the first platform, the jersey shore reject waving her hands in front of her face in order to see. "First up at the Kick Start it's Anne Maria against Geoff," the host said before the shot moved on to the next pair. "Then, it's DJ versus Sammy," the brickhouse and nervous cheerleader looked about before the shot pulled back to show the cannons, "versus the Cannonballs."
"Molly faces Scott in Wrecking Ball Alley," the indie chick and devious stared at each other, the former more competitively. "B is up against Scarlett in the Gang Plank," the camera cut to the base of the ladder then panned all the way up to it to the strong, silent genius and the quiet brainiac on top, "Dave and Leshawna will battle Double Trouble," the normal guy looked warily at the butt-shaped apparatus in front of him while the sista just cracked her knuckles, "and, Sierra will fight Trent for the Grand Slam." The obsessive uberfan nervously looked around while the cool guy tried to maintain his balance, the shot moving out to show the baseball mitt.
"First team to finish wins the whoooole shebang," Chris explained. "And, the other team loses a member tonight! Since it's a relay race," he added, "you'll need something to pass: your mascots," he said with a grin. "Oh, intern~!"
A scrawny white boy with his long black hair flipped over his eyes walked up to Geoff and Anne Maria holding a pair of pet carriers; whatever was inside was snarling angrily enough for the two competitors to exchange a wary look. "Team Rat gets a mutant rat," Chris announced as the intern thrust a large, squealing, six-legged hairless rat into Geoff's arms. "And Team Maggot gets," the host continued, "a mutant maggot," a large, slimy green maggot was thrust into Anne Maria's arms.
"Ew. It's a what?" Anne Maria said in surprise.
"Aaaand," Chris said as he prepared an airhorn, "go!"
At the sound of the horn the giant boot swung down on the two campers. With a yelp Anne Maria managed to duck out of the way, but Geoff was not so lucky and got sent flying with a scream. He landed in the mud between platforms, but kept the rat held high. It burped as Chris said "And Geoff gets the boot!"
Anne Maria hopped across the gap between platforms with the maggot in her arms.
"Anne Maria takes the early lead," Chris continued, and the jersey girl ran up to DJ.
"Here!" Anne Maria held out their mascot.
"I'll take this cute critter from here," DJ took the maggot from her, then turned and ran off down the course.
"Yeah, I got it goin' on," Anne Maria walked back the opposite way...and blindly fell into the gap between platforms, landing with a squelch of mud.
The shot cut to DJ as he ran along his part of the platform. He slammed face-first into a post, then recoiled a few steps. He vigorously shook his head and sidestepped around the post. He only got another two steps before a sudden cannon volley through the floor in front of him forced him to a stop with a yelp.
Now covered in mud, Geoff ran along the first part of the platform with his rat held out in front of him. He jumped the gap, and soon reached Sammy. "We're already far behind! Go!" the party boy held out their team's mascot.
"Got it!" Sammy said, grabbing the rat and running off.
"The Rats take the lead!" Chris called out as Sammy caught up to DJ at the start of the cannonball run. Another cannon fired towards them, forcing both to dart and duck out of the way.
"Okay," Sammy assured herself, "I just have to dodge a bunch of cannons that are impossible to see!" She charged forward, leaving DJ to chase after her.
"Time to try again," DJ added in.
The scene moved to Scott and Molly waiting at the start of the next leg. Sammy ran up and thrust the rat into Scott's arms, panting after she did so.
"Wow. We're in the lead? Great," Scott realized and started to walk slowly. "Nice and slow, all the way to last place. Right, little guy?" He told the rat while walking along the rolling log, but the rat bit him in the chin. He howled painfully and missed the wrecking ball swinging down at him. It caught him and sent him flying, all the way into B.
"Faster, DJ!" Molly yelled as DJ ran up to her and handed over their maggot.
"Good luck," DJ supported Molly as she headed for the rolling logs.
Scott was lying on the floor and petting the rat with B watching as the shot cut back to them.
"Aww, who's my good freak? Who's my good little freak?" Scott faux affectionately talked to the rat in order to slow them down as B was signaling him to pass it to him. "There, there, little guy. Uncle Scotty kept you safe and sound." He saw B waiting. "Oh, do you want this? Why didn't you say so, Beverly?"
Having enough, B took the rat before putting it in his pocket and jumped on to the first precariously isolated platform. It immediately started to wobble and sink, and B quietly cried out in alarm as the camera quick-panned to the base revealing the two mutant beavers making quick work of the pole, causing him to fall down into the mud. He recovered and saw the two ferocious-looking beavers he had landed next to.
Molly was looking up and back just in time to see the wrecking ball swinging towards her. She jumped up, safely grabbing on to the ball and allowing it to carry her forward. She jumped off at the extent of its swing, and sailed further on through the air.
The camera quick-panned over to B as he hastily sculpted a female beaver out of mud. The two beavers looked past the muddy feel and fell in love with it. As they ran over to hug it, B sneakily slipped past.
"And in a surprisingly touching move, B extends the Rats' lead," Chris announced out loud.
Scott was watching from where he landed. "Oh, come on!" he whined in disappointment.
"Go now!" Molly told Scarlett as she handed the maggot over, Scarlett immediately turning.
The beavers stopped hugging the mud sculptured beaver when the head fell off. Realizing that they were tricked, they soon turned vengeful.
Scarlett hopped to the first platform. It immediately wobbled thanks to the beavers gnawing the leg, taking Scarlett down.
"Alright, my brotha!" Leshawna cheered and took the rat from the tired B. "Let me take it from here."
Leshawna threw herself on to the first butt-shaped thing, landed, and bounced off it without a word. She continued on in this way, bouncing from one to the next until eventually she reached the end. "Sierra, take it!" she yelled to her teammate, the fangirl waiting with her back turned at the edge of the next platform.
Despite stretching her rat-holding arms out towards him as she fell, Leshawna was unable to make the pass-off in time before falling completely past her and landing in the mud. "What?" Sierra said as she finally turned around. "Aww. I missed the catch."
The shot cut to Leshawna face down in the mud. The mutant rat scampered out of her grasp. With a growl, Leshawna scrambled to her feet and chased after it screaming "Get back here!"
"Here you go," Scarlett told her teammate as the shot cut back to her holding the muddy and slimy maggot out to him.
"Got it!" Dave said as he reached out for the mutated larva.
It promptly vomited onto his face.
"IT THREW UP ON ME!!!" Dave freaked out and ran while one of the beavers grabbed Scarlett's head and dragged her down.
The perspective briefly changed to show the blurry obstacle that Dave was approaching, then changed back to his head-on close-up as he became visibly determined.
"The quicker I finish this, the quicker I can clean up!" Dave told himself just as he jumped onto the first butt-shaped object; he landed on his chest with a pained yelp and bounced off, continuing on painfully from one bouncy apparatus to the next until eventually he landed on his chest on the far platform with a slam and a groan.
"And Dave takes back the lead for the Maggots!" Chris announced, the camera cutting to him and Chef on their chairs. "He really doesn't like to get messy."
"Alright, it's my turn!" Trent declared confidently, turning proudly towards the end of the course.
"Hurry up!" Dave told him impatiently.
The camera panned back to the left, passing Dave and reaching Sierra just as Leshawna forced their team's mascot into her arms. "Here!" she commanded.
"Sorry I didn't catch it in time," Sierra apologized.
"It's like they say on Blackcomb Mountain. "Best glimpse of heaven's on the way into-" Trent said before reaching the giant mitt and saw how far it was. "Hello."
Meanwhile, Scarlett was in danger courtesy of the two beavers.
"I would ask if you detach from me now," Scarlett begged while a beaver took out a bottle of ketchup and licked their teeth. "I warned you," Scarlett growled before kicking both of their groins, making them moan. "If you had simply not taken me, then I wouldn't have had to resort to kicking you two. I show no sympathy."
Sierra had finally caught up to Trent in the Grand Slam. "This is like the electric eel part of the trust challenge from season one," Sierra talked to herself before grabbing one of the ropes that had been loosely tied there and swung off.
She passed between the baseball bats, and planted her feet on the baseball mitt. Sierra slowly lost her standing and fell into the mud. "Being splattered by mud is better than being electrocuted I guess," she laughed a bit.
Back at the edge of the platform, Trent grabbed the end of the other rope. He unleashed his own terrified cry as he swung blindly through the Grand Slam, and almost made it to the mitt – but slammed into one of the last bats with his legs spread wide. He painfully groaned as he slid down into the mud.
The footage skipped ahead to show a muddy Sierra running up for her second go, the ropes once again tied to a post on the side of the platform. "This time, I should swing higher. Then I'll be on the mitt for sure," the blogger discussed with herself.
"C'mon Sierra!" Geoff called out to her, the shot cutting to show him and the other Rats standing on a nearby platform without the glasses that had been forced on them. "Swing!"
Sierra grabbed one of the ropes again and jumped off. She stuck her legs out in front of her and passed by each bat in turn. However, her muddy hands caused her to fall from the rope just before she reached the mitt and she fell into the mud.
The Rats all groaned.
The camera panned past them and on to Trent, who had grabbed his own rope again and was sizing up his next swing. "My team needs the win," he told himself, tucking the maggot under his arm as he used his fingers to frame his target.
The music turned triumphant as he ran forward and swung off. He hit all the bats, and the peak of his swing put him just about over the mitt. It was then that he let go of the rope and fell down towards the goal, landing on his head as the maggot landed on top of him.
"The Maggots win!" Chris announced, and the maggot mascot threw up on the musician.
The Maggots cheered, having also discarded their glasses, while the five nearby members of the Toxic Rats groaned once more.
"To the Maggots, the spoils," Chris announced as Chef walked over to the winning team holding some kind of gift basket. "McLean Brand Soap, Shampoo, and Conditioner. Guaranteed to wash off the stink!" the host listed over a close-up of the gift basket, showing off its contents against a radiant yellow background.
"I'll definitely keep those in handy!" Dave said with a smile.
"Make sure not to hog all of it," Katie reminded him.
Confessional: Katie
"If my team was up for elimination, I probably would have been the one eliminated, and I wouldn't have my tablet with me. I dodged a bullet there," Katie cheered.
Confessional Ends
"Rats, see you at the elimination ceremony!' Chris added with his usual smile.
The five members of the Rats groaned for a third time. "I could've used the reward to wash off the mess," Leshawna groaned.
Sierra moaned as she got off the muddy floor, coughing up mud in the process. "Losing two times in a row? That's not gonna go well for my blog."
\
The footage flashed ahead to all of the Toxic Rats except for B and Sierra assembled at the steps leading up to their cabin. The camera focused on Scott, who was standing on the ground in front of the others. "All right, guys. Sierra's gotta go. She lost the challenge for us, and she's more focused on using her phone than competing most of the time."
"Now hang on!" Geoff replied. "So she made a mistake and slipped up. We aren't robots. I'm thinking we should give her a second chance."
"Sierra is also a big fan of the show," Sammy said. "Voting her off this early wouldn't be fair to her."
"Fair, smhair," Leshawna muttered. "If eliminating her allows us to sleep without being disturbed by her constant texting to her friends, I'm all for it."
\
The footage flashed ahead again to show the Toxic Rats at the campfire pit, Chef and Chris standing before them with their respective marshmallows.
"Ready?" Chris asked. "Everyone gets a marshmallow, even the loser!" The shot cut to a close-up of the strongbox in Chef's mitted hands. "But that's one marshmallow you do not wanna eat," Chris added as his assistant flipped the lid up and revealed the bright glowing thing inside.
"To the votes! The following people are safe," the host said, picking up the first normal marshmallow off his tray. "Geoff." The party guy caught his prize with a smile.
"Leshawna." The sista sitting next to him was next, satisfied as she caught her marshmallow.
"Scott." The devious, slumped forward, raised his free left hand and caught his prize.
"And Sammy." The nervous cheerleader allowed her marshmallow to fall into her open hands.
"Which leaves, Sierra and Bev," Chris announced, earning a nervous look from both teens.
"What?" Sierra asked in shock.
"And the Marshmallow of Loserdom goes to," Chris said, trailing off as the camera slowly zoomed in on the faces of the bottom two nervous campers.
"Sierra," the host finished.
"Me? But why?" Sierra sputtered in shock while B caught his marshmallow with his mouth.
"Don't know and don't care," Chris said. "You're out."
Sierra dodged the toxic marshmallow thrown her way. "It is what it is, but one last thing!" She whipped out her phone and snapped a photo of her and her teammates, blinding their eyesight and making them audibly yelp. "#ToxicRatsForever!" she enthusiastically claimed and ran to the Hurl of Shame.
\
The footage cut over to the Dock of Shame, the camera zoomed in on Chris and Sierra in the catapult's bucket.
"Any last words before we give you the Hurl of Shame?" Chris asked.
"Of course. Can I have a self-" Sierra said before Chris unflinchingly launched her into the air. Sierra finished with a scream as she disappeared into the night.
Chris laughed. "It was a rhetorical question. Two hurls down, twelve to go! Who will be eliminated next?" he asked the camera. "Tune in, and find out, on Total! Drama! Revenge! Of! The Island!"
(Roll the Credits)

Previous posts:

• Shadespire
• Nightvault

For those unfamiliar with Warhammer Underworlds, it's Games Workshop's card/mini/board game set in the Mortal Realms. Almost every card in the game has a small snippet of lore on it in addition to its rules text; some of the lore is simple statements about the card's effect, but others describe the setting or the fighters or provide in-universe quotes. I haven't found a card library that compiles these lore snippets (they are understandably focused on the rules), so I decided to compile them myself.
This is my third post of the project, compiling the cards from the third season of the game, Beastgrave. This is the first major setting update, since the previous seasons (Shadespire and Nightvault) both took place in Shadespire, while this one takes place in Beastgrave, a living mountain in Ghur.
Cards for the season starter warbands:
Grashrak's Despoilers:

Text	Card Name
There is a diabolical method to the Brayherds' depravity.	Bestial Cunning
The gruesome food for Grashrak's primal sorceries are rarely in short supply.	Blood Ritual
To beastmen, carnage and mayhem are ends unto themselves.	Bloodshed
The creatures of the Brayhertds stampede forth from their domains whenever a more enticing territory presents itself.	Conquerors
True victory comes only when all the enemy held dear is reduced to ruin.	Despoilers
To Grashrak's Despoilers, there is no sight more pleasing than that of unsullied flesh being butchered.	Killing Blow
In the wild, the alpha creature is the one still standing at battle's end.	Proven Superiority
There is no better hunting ground than the lands of a defiant enemy.	Raiders
Beastmen strike hard and fast, and they seldom do so alone.	Stampede
Bloodshed breeds strength, and strength breeds opportunity.	Survival of the Fittest
Wherever Grashrak's Despoilers go, so follows the corruption of Chaos.	Swarm the Battlefield
It is not enough to despoil the land - the air itself must writhe with the power of anarchy.	Taint of Ruin
The primal fury of the Brayherds is infamous, and rightly feared.	Baying Anger
The true children of Chaos are driven by instinctual animosity.	Baying Hatred
There is nothing more fearful than a wounded beastman.	Berserk Bellow
Primal magics swirl across the battlefield, driving the herd towards their foe.	Bestial Vigour
The language of the Brayherds is not elegant, but it is easily understood.	Blood Taunt
Grashrak's Despoilers use every weapon that nature and Chaos have bestowed upon them.	Bull Charge
A bestial curse twists the foe in both body and mind.	Devolve
When hunting down prey, speed is as important as brute strength.	Skirmisher
Like carrion feeders to a corpse, the beasts of the Brayherds flock to territories they can despoil.	Vile Invaders
The notion of a fair fight is anathema to Ungors.	Weight of Numbers
Why work to conceal yourself when you can simply take away your hunter's ability to see?	Blinding Attack
The scent of blood only intensifies the hunger for battle.	Bloodcrazed
Even the most masterfully wrought armour crumples at the touch of this Chaos-infused blade.	Cursed Flint
There are few greater weapons than a strong instinct for self-preservation.	Dogged Survivor
Always another foe, always another quarry, the bloodletting in Beastgrave is never-ending.	Endless Hatred
Pain is the one sense the beastmen seek to dull.
Those with the shortest horns must find other ways to puncture their prey.	Jabbing Spear
Seething energy crashes into the enemy, tearing at their flesh and driving them from their feet.	Savage Bolt
Grashrak has an innate understanding of the anarchic and the arcane.	Sorcerous Trinket
Amongst the Brayherds, the severed head of one's enemy is the ultimate symbol of status.	Trophy Taker

Skaeth's Wild Hunt:

Text	Card Name
In Beastgrave, there is no end to the hunt.	Aspects of Kurnoth
Once the quarry has been sighted, it is Karthaen's horn that calls the Wild Hunt.	Cry of the Wild
Preparation is the first step towards victory.	Gifts of Kurnoth
There are multiple ways to take down one's quarry.	Hunt's End
In the wilds, one must always be aware of their surroundings.	Kurnoth's Snare
It is Karthaen's hope that the Beastgrave itself will some day be scoured from the realms.	Purifying Rites
'Your blood shall flow free, and it shall wash away the corruption you have brought to this land.' - Sheoch, Kurnothi Tracker	Ritual Kill
'Your death is as inevitable as the changing of the seasons.' - Skaeth the Huntsman	Run Down
'Die, foul creature. No longer shall you be a blight upon the realms.' - Skaeth the Huntsman	Run Through
'Who can catch an arrow in flight? Its speed is its armour, and the source of its deadliness.' - Althaen, Kurnothi Tracker	Safety in Swiftness
The most fallow soil can be made fertile if seeded with enough bone and flesh.	Slay the Corrupted
The Wild Hunt seek to ensure that no more souls fall to the Katophrane curse.	Soulbinding
With a blast of his horn, the air itself, the air itself comes to Karthaen's aid.	Binding Wind
The Wild Hunt advance on their foes with the speed of a summer storm.	Fleet of Foot
Even in the cavernous depths of Beastgrave, the live-giving winds of Ghyran can blow strong.	Healing Breeze
'I am the Hunt! The Hunter grows within me!' - Sheoch, Kurnothi Tracker	Might of Kurnoth
The weal must be reaped so that the strong may thrive. That is the way of the hunt.	Pounce
'That which was made to run must run. That which was made to fly must fly. That which was made to kill must kill.' - Skaeth the Huntsman	Retrieve Javelin
The resounding blaze of Karthaen's horn imbues the members of the Wild Hunt with bountiful vigour.	Song of Swiftness
Just as they seek harmony in life, the Wild Hunt work in harmony to bring death to those who would desecrate the realms.	Strike in Concert
In the pursuit of their foes, the Kurnothi are as relentless as a winter's gale.	Swift as the Wind
Any enemy that values its life can be herded, given adequate provocation.	Battle Cry
The Kurnothi call upon their fallen god to drive their enemies from the lands that have been corrupted.	Divine Strength
There is no escaping thise fighter's fury when they have marked their prey for death.	Eye of Kurnoth
Althaen's arrows fall swift and sharp as monsoon rains.	Fast Shot
It is speed, not strength, that allows prey to outrun its predator, and a predator to close ground on its prey.	Great Strides
Even now, Kurnoth's gifts still protect those who are faithful to him.	Hale Charm
Those familiar with malkyn know that when their teeth are bared, it is already too late to run.	Hunting Aspect
'Bring life to the lands, and death to those who would despoil them.' - Kurnothi chant	Kurnoth's Mark
An enemy's offence becomes severely limited when their bones have been shattered.	Shield Slash
At Karthaen's call, the motes of life magic in Beastgrave coalesce into barbed projectiles that fly towards his foes.	Vicious Darts

Starter box universal cards:

Text	Card Name
When the enemy lie broken and bloodied to the last, then can the deep rumbling of Beastgrave be heard.	Annihilation
Stride forth boldly and seize that which belongs to your enemy.	Conquest
Hold fast to what is yours, no matter the cost.	Denial
Seize the howl-horn and let its mournful dirge echo through Beastgrave's heart.	Hold Objective 1
Capture the amber-bone riches of Ghur.	Hold Objective 2
The throne of tusks may be claimed only by one who is worthy.	Hold Objective 3
The worth of the gargant's blade is beyond imagination.	Hold Objective 4
Dare you don the mask of the Silent People?	Hold Objective 5
Seize the heart of the mountain, chamber by twisted chamber.	Supremacy
The cursed caverns within Beastgrave can disorient even the most keen-minded explorer.	Confusion
A morbid fume surrounds the casts, choking any foe that dare approach.	Eldritch Haze
'Nowhere have you left to run, nor any place to hide...' - Skaeth the Huntsman	Marked
The key to survival is being where your predators least expect.	Sidestep
The key to killing is to attack where your prey least expects.	Snare
An opponent cannot always be defeated, but they can always be made to pay for their actions.	Caltrops
The most fearsome creatures in Beastgrave are those who have adapted to survive in an environment of slaughter.	Great Fortitude
The bestial might of Ghur flows through this fighter's veins.	Great Strength
Driven by primal urges, this fighter watches their enemies for the slightest sign of weakness.	Predatory Instinct

She's not aggressive, she just slaps or steps on your head if you're laying down. She also pushes my other smaller dogs face into the ground. She also will jump at people's back when they're walking.
Can you train these behaviours out of a 10 month old puppy?

So from my very limited understanding, a dog's sense of smell can be thousands of times as good as a humans. I personally would say I have above average smell for a human, regular hearing, bad eyesight but my sense of smell is good. If someone with strong cologne walks past that's all I can really smell and I can't notice other scents because the cologne is so strong. If certain animals have such a good sense of smell, I'd understand how they can smell things from far away, or smell cancer developing in humans, but I don't understand how they could do this when someone or something close by has a very strong odour. Surely their smelling receptors are totally jam packed with an overload of information about that smell, orders of magnitude higher than ours would be.
Thanks 🙏🏼

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​
Synopsis:
Juliette Contzen is a lazy, good-for-nothing princess. Overshadowed by her siblings, she's left with little to do but nap, read … and occasionally cut the falling raindrops with her sword. Spotted one day by an astonished adventurer, he insists on grading Juliette's swordsmanship, then promptly has a mental breakdown at the result.
Soon after, Juliette is given the news that her kingdom is on the brink of bankruptcy. At threat of being married off, the lazy princess vows to do whatever it takes to maintain her current lifestyle, and taking matters into her own hands, escapes in the middle of the night in order to restore her kingdom's finances.
Tags: Comedy, Adventure, Action, Fantasy, Copious Ohohohohos.
​
Chapter 90: Death Of Death
The frozen chamber became a blur as I performed a beautiful, if involuntary roll in the air, before promptly finding myself engulfed in the familiar cushions which were Coppelia's arms.
It wasn't the softest of catches. But it wasn't the softest of landings, either. Because my arrival caused her–and me–to be driven right into the deep snow beneath us.
Poof!
A concerning sound greeted our combined impact … and yet that was little compared to the almighty noise of the Snow Dancer's embarrassing demise!
An echoing crescendo like no other filled my ears. And no wonder.
Falling before me had been a shower of sharpened hailstones, clattering viciously against the spot where she’d stood. The chamber groaned as the weight of so much frozen snow hurtled back down meant an eruption which blanketed the air in a veil thicker than any fog or steam.
Even so, one noise rose above the din like an ocean wave amidst a storm.
“Ahahahahaha … hahahahah … aahaahahahahah!~”
Coppelia's muffled laughter greeted me before my head even popped out of the snow.
The only joy was I couldn't see anything. And yet I could still all too easily imagine her slapping the snow in rabid amusement even as she lay buried in it.
“Ahahaha … hahahahaah … ahahahaha~”
I pursed my lips as the laughter washed over me.
Perhaps I should remain buried in the snow? At least then I wouldn't have to witness her expression as the fog cleared.
“Uff … hrrghh … ughhh ...”
I put the temptation aside as I slowly rose from the snow, using Starlight Grace as a guiding star as I dug myself out. Still, it clung to me like vines entangled around a branch as I released myself piecemeal, arms and torso first, followed lastly by my legs as I slowly extracted myself.
Finally, I pulled my foot out.
A bare foot.
Horrified, I crawled back into the hole and retrieved my boot. Then, after ensuring my footwear was back where it belonged, I shook my head to remove the white hat that'd formed atop my hair.
To … To think that I'd almost been sighted without my boot of authority!
My soles symbolised my power!
Without it, I'd be nothing but an extremely beautiful maiden!
Quietly thanking the mist which engulfed the chamber, I rose to my feet and assessed the state of the chamber. There was nothing to see other than a thick shroud of white. And so it fell to my expert foot poking technique to draw out any pertinent information.
All I felt were holes. Many, many holes.
“Hm hm hm hm hmm ♫.”
Yes, I was in a very good mood.
And why not?
I'd just sent a finely crafted hailstorm crashing down onto the Snow Dancer! And judging by the many pits I could feel with the tip of my boot, the A-rank sword saint had become an A-rank emmental!
“Ohohohoho! Behold! My ability to cut snow as I would my award winning clay busts! Foolish woman! No matter how many centuries you live, you can never hope to use the elements to defeat me!”
I filled the chamber with my mocking laughter, allowing it to echo throughout the mist. And rightfully so!
To think that my [Winter Snow Shovel] could so readily counterattack an ability with such a frightful name as [Gravity Reversal]! Why, this not only proved that naming conventions were utterly irrelevant, but that Starlight Grace proved the superior weapon!
An elven sword with a sapphire pommel? An impressive thing. But compared to the splendour of ruby, there was no contest! Not only was the gemstone I sported costlier on every market, but my sword was a thing of stories!
True, I may not remember any … but that hardly matters! Even an elven sword was pedestrian compared to Starlight Grace's long history! And as soon as I returned to the Royal Villa, I would inquire as to what they were … in order to add my own!
Ohohohoho!
Yes, my own place in my family's proud legacy was now secure.
With only a gardening technique, I had defeated a sword saint. Such a humiliating loss for her needed to be sung by minstrels the world over. Did it matter if I hadn't actually struck her with my blade? No, of course not. That only made my victory even more worthy of applause.
But just in case it did matter, well–
“Oooph … that was close!”
The Snow Dancer was willing to provide me another opportunity.
Instantly, all the mist was swept aside to the sound of a blade singing through the air.
In its place, I saw an elven woman standing upon the precipice of a thousand tiny craters in the floor.
“I mean, seriously,” said Ophelia, wiping a bead of non-existent sweat from her brows. “I thought I saw the light at the end of the tunnel there, and let me tell you, it was a lot whiter than I thought it'd be!”
I was outraged.
“Why are you still standing?!” I demanded. “I just magnificently sent your own attack back into you! How dare you still be conscious! It wasn't just beautiful, it was poetic! Do … Do you have no sense for theatre?!”
I pointed below me.
There, peeking out from the snow, was the top of Coppelia's fluffy golden hair. A pair of turquoise eyes clearly blinked at the sight of the Snow Dancer still very much on her feet.
“Even my future handmaiden was mocking your demise! How do you think she feels knowing that her laughter is now wasted?! The embarrassment is palpable!”
Ophelia shrugged, wiping a smattering of snow from her shoulders. The only harm to come to her.
“I'm good at dancing. Especially on snow.”
“You danced out of the way?”
“Name's the game. Granted, I never knew I was good at dancing out of the way of my own [Gravity Reversal], but it's good to know that's a thing I can do now. You know, the next time absolutely nobody is going to turn my own technique into an ice storm. How did you do that?”
I raised Starlight Grace.
“Through effort and countless hours dedicated to my craft,” I replied, incensed that she lacked the common decency to even feign being deceased. “And if you enjoyed the spectacle, then I'll be delighted to demonstrate it to you once again!”
The elven woman wore a look of academic curiosity on her face.
“Oh? With your ice technique ... or perhaps your wind one? Gotta admit, that one almost hit me. Good thing I'm also fast, huh? A variable speed skill. It's more like a spell. That's impressive. I'm guessing it's your signature ability?”
“Quite so. I favour it for the removal of insects without the harming of leaves.”
The Snow Dancer smiled.
Then, she adjusted her feet, adopting a ready posture while sheathing her blade once more.
“I like you. It's been a long time since anybody's stopped my attacks. It's great! It's even enough to make me forget the boredom. And I've been so, so bored.”
I raised an eyebrow.
Yes, my gardening techniques were somewhat becoming more akin to Clarise's wild experiments than ways to shoo away caterpillars these days. I wouldn't deny that. But a sword saint should also be able to cut faster than the eye could follow.
This is not the impression I had so far. Had her foes been so poor that they'd simply accepted their fates without so much as a look of indignation?
“I believe the quality of your opponents have been severely lacking,” I said, quite honestly.
She beamed.
“I think so, too.”
Fwishhh.
Brimming with joyful, murderous intent, a newly made circle of pure golden flames suddenly erupted around the Snow Dancer's figure. Snow melted around her in a blazing ring, and yet the newly billowing smoke failed to hide the smile keener than any blade.
This, I knew, was not [Gravity Reversal].
“I mean, I'm pretty sure the boredom's driven me insane. Actually insane. Do you know how long it's been since I've actually spoken this much with someone? Actually spoken, that is. And not whatever weird stuff I say when I'm speaking out loud. This is definitely the reason I'm still single.”
Suddenly, I felt my bangs rustling against my forehead as an unknown breeze swept through the chamber. It fell across the elven woman, lifting her own silver hair as though she were stood upon a clifftop.
“So, I'm feeling flashy! And since you've used your own signature ability, I'm going to do something special and use mine. I mean, I haven't done it for a while, so I hope you don't mind if I lose my footwork slightly. But well, I'm also not looking forward to being bored again, so maybe it's okay to miss just once.”
The Snow Dancer let out a short breath, her eyes closing.
When she opened them again, nothing could be seen of the blue irises.
Instead, they blazed with a golden light.
“Eh, who am I kidding,” said Ophelia, slowly drawing her sword, now glimmering with a light to match her eyes. “I never miss. After all ... mine is the sword to pierce the void, cutting a path through boundless infinity.”
The elven woman pushed back on her heel.
“Snow Helix Form, 10th Stance … [Yuleblade Dance].”
And then–she skipped.
In that moment, the very air between us shattered.
As if reality itself made way for her oncoming attack, everything between us cracked into a thousand fragments as viscerally as broken glass. The pieces floated with the grace of dandelion seeds, each shard a kaleidoscope of colour and dazzling light as hints of pure darkness appeared between the cracks.
As she skipped, she danced, the fragments of reality collected around her drawn sword as she spun. The shards gathered and coalesced around her blade, before trailing behind her as an exact mirror copy. And not just one.
They were endless.
I blinked.
In that moment, she had covered the distance between us. And I understood why Ophelia was more than a sword saint.
She was the Snow Dancer. And this was her ballroom.
Because as she approached, only the snow was undisturbed.
She glided upon it like a swan in a lake as behind her, countless copies of her sword trailing in her wake as she spun like a dancer with a ribbon.
Ophelia danced with footwork lighter than air.
And this time, there was no quelling with my scowl.
Innumerable swords twisted and ripped from reality followed her like deadly marionettes upon strings, each poised in an executing attack. Even if one blade was stopped, those that followed would continue unhindered. Her [Yuleblade Dance] was not a strike, but an ode to death as she elegantly skipped and twirled towards me.
Yes.
This was indeed a problem.
For her.
Because if the Snow Dancer wished to dance, then she needed an invitation.
My …. was what I was seeing true?
A mere titled commoner, lower than the lowest of nobility, daring to assume she could dance with me?
The … The sheer nerve! The cheek! The absolute disrespect!
I could put up with holes in the ceiling! Minotaurs robbing me! Rusty traps trying to murder me!
But for the Snow Dancer to not know dancing etiquette was an absolute travesty to common decency! Who did she bribe to attain her title?!
There was protocol! Heaps of it! More than could be written in any rulebook!
To do away with social convention with such callous disregard was an insult to my status and time! Inquiries needed to be made! Courtesies exchanged! Gifts rendered! Did she not realise how staggeringly popular I was?!
Why, the waiting list to dance with me stretched longer than the walls of the Royal Villa! During a soirée, the queue stretched so far that a sign denoting waiting time needed to be utilised!
No … were this a clash of swordsmanship, then I'd have no answer.
But if this was a dance, then I was peerless.
Because while snow was this woman's ballroom, this entire kingdom was my court. And upon it, I chose who to dance with.
As the sword saint neared and reality bent to her will, I refused to humour her request.
With Starlight Grace raised, I adopted a pose in readiness. The Snow Dancer smiled in response, skipping towards me as her silver sword stood poised to meet my heart.
And then–
I turned and stuck my leg out.
“...... Huh?”
The Snow Dancer blinked.
The next moment, all I saw of the elven woman was her bewildered expression as my foot caught her ankle.
Ohohohohhhohohoho!
Here it was! My ultimate ability! … Again!
[Princess Rejection]!!
Absolute refusal of all uninvited solicitations without first having adhered to correct social formalities!
Faced with instincts hardened through years of declining the ungracefulness of lesser nobility at our soirées, I turned as I would should a mere baroness seek to catch me unawares–before inconspicuously sending her toppling, publicly maintaining deniability while also leaving no doubt as to what I'd done!
But for the Snow Dancer, it wasn't the smooth marble floor of the Royal Villa which met her tumbling fall.
Instead–the sword saint flew uncontrollably forwards, crashing violently face first into a very large and very hard pillar.
As she met the ancient stonework to an eruption of snow, dust and rubble, a crack worthy of a wince sounded throughout the chamber.
Then came the swords waltzing in her wake.
They smashed into and through the pillar. A groan of broken masonry sounded as the elven-woman shaped indent in the pillar fully shattered and broke. Chunks of rubble collapsed atop the prone sword saint, burying her in a mound worthy of a tombstone.
A dollop of snow fell as the dust cleared. And after a long moment, all that could be spied within the mess of broken stone was a small bed of silver hair covered in a blanket of misery.
I peered, waiting for the movement.
The reprisal.
The obstinacy of an A-rank sword saint who escaped shattering hailstorms and blasts of wind as easily as a cat leaping from fence to fence.
Instead, all I received was a pitiful groan.
“...... Uuuuhhhhh …...”
I waited.
And then–
“Ohhohohohohohoho!”
I raised my hand to my lips.
Indeed, the soirée was a battleground of sabotage as nobility warred with a deftness of feet to put even the Snow Dancer to shame!
And I danced greater than them all!
“Aaahhahaahaahahhaahah!”
Off to the side, an extremely unhelpful clockwork doll stole my laughter.
At some point, she'd extracted herself from the snow and was now a white barrel, rolling to and fro as she occasionally slapped her palms down around her.
“Ahhahahahaha … ahahhahahah … ahhahaahhaahh ...”
I pursed my lips, considered waiting for her amusement to subside … then decided to continue laughing as well.
“Ohohohohohohoho!”
Why, if I intended to mock my fallen opponent regardless, then I may as well do so while my future handmaiden could join me in a derisive chorus!
“Behold, Coppelia! See how the inelegant fall to their own naïvety! The woman may be a sword saint, but in the end, she possessed the oafishness of countryside nobility! Against my fleet footwork, she had as much hope of victory as she did against the stars!”
“Ahahaha … I can … I can see that … ahahah … it was … it was … just as I expected … ahahahahha~”
I winced.
N-Naturally, her confidence in me was well placed!
Even so, I preferred that she endeavour to rush to my assistance whenever I was faced with mortal peril. Clearly, work was needed. While a handmaiden who knew not to take away from my limelight was a valuable asset, there was also ample opportunity to demonstrate unerring loyalty by wilfully throwing herself against foes.
But like all things, there was a queue to my time.
And so–to matters at hand.
“Come, Coppelia!” I said, turning from the bundle of silver hair as a fresh heap of snow landed on her groaning form. “Aquina's treasury awaits! Only a single door now seeks to stand between us and our rightfully owed taxes!”
Suddenly, Coppelia looked up from her freshly rolled bed of snow.
The smile she wore elevated upwards by several degrees. Her eyes glittered with the promise of revelry. And for me, that was more worrisome than any sword saint.
“Actually, I don't think the door's going to be a problem.”
I blinked.
Then, I turned fully around–only to witness the arched door to Aquina's vault parting, its great weight shovelling snow out of its path as easily as a dragon's tail.
Quack, quack. Quack, quack.
As it opened, a fluffy white duck waddled in through the gap.
A moment later, the vault fully revealed itself, and then I saw to whom its allegiance was sworn.
Because basking beneath streams of moonlight was the figure of someone I'd never seen before. A woman whose beautiful appearance elicited no recognition from me.
Still, I knew who she was without question.
After all, I was royalty.
And I could sense when another of my stature was present. Especially when she sat on a makeshift throne of snow and coins, possessed dazzling wings of mirror-like beauty, and wielded a fine crystal teacup in her hand.
The Winter Queen, it seems, had come to the Kingdom of Tirea.
​
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Seems too much for evaporation and haven’t had this issue before. Got a new liner at the end of last summer.

An old alcoholic was walking around when a car accidentally ran over his dog, crushing it to a pulp. He sat down on the grass totally distraught. The whole world was against him, suddenly he noticed a lamp half-buried in the ground. He dug it up, polished it and immediately a Genie appeared. "You have freed me from thousands of years of imprisonment, " said the Genie" As a reward I shall grant you one wish."
"Well, " said the alcoholic, "I have all the material things I need, but let me show you this dog." They walk over to the splattered remains of the dog. "Do you think you could bring this dog back to life for me..?" the alcoholic asked. The Genie carefully looked at the remains and shook his head. "This body is too far gone for even me to bring it back to life. Is there something else you would like..?" The alcoholic thought for a minute, "Can you get me sober without having to go to those meetings?" The genie thought, and after a few minutes said, "Let’s have another look at that dog"

Hi all, I'm in zone 6b. I have a small yard, steep flower bed with small retaining wall, and at the top is the edge of our livestock pasture.
The prior owner loved multi-flora rose, which is beautiful, but must die!! We also have barberry and honeysuckle taking over this hillside. We've tried our best to combat it by trimming, and so far my best luck has been using daylilies to help outcompete it.
We now have fun power toys that we're able to rip out the bushes and roots with. I need some help choosing what to replace it with.
I can't have anything toxic to livestock (cows, goats, horses, chickens) and need a decent border of short growing plants (or ones that can stand frequent trimming) to keep our electric fence from grounding out.
Our pasture is a mix of mostly clovers, kentucky bluegrass, and ryegrass.
I know livestock and no lawn is pretty contradictory, but I was hoping someone might have experience with trying to border fields nicely!

Hi! So when it comes to feeding time, our dogs get kibble and a food topper- in the last couple months, my beagle (male-5years old) started a bad habit of bark incessantly as soon as the wet food/topper is being mixed into his kibble. It’s like he had to communicate “omg wet food! Hurry hurrry give me give me)”
Meanwhile my other dog (German shepherd mix (female - 4 years old) sits so patiently like a good gurlll until I put her bowl on the ground and say “Bon appetite”!)
I’ve tried a couple things, -giving him his bowl first, -I’ve tried turning my back and ignoring him until he stops. Both no progress.
He’s a beagle so he’s dramatic and stubborn. But he never used to act this way. And I don’t want it to continue.
Any advice?

Been looking for any info on how to use them properly, I've got electricity fine but my batteries don't charge, what am I doing wrong here? When placed they have the red line connected to them but when my generator runs out of fuel everything switches off and when close to my batteries they have the symbol for not connected (I think) above them, I know the game is very glitchy right now so I'm wondering if I missed something or of this is a bug?

So I have moved into this place recently and just had a smart meter fitted. The current boiler is really old, had a few issues with it and the hot water pressure and asked the plumber how old it was and he basically said it’s as old as the building lol.
Now I have a smart meter I can see that it basically costs around £1.40 to run the boiler for an hour. I’m wondering how energy efficiency this is and whether I have any grounds to get them to replace with something bettemore energy efficient?
I am currently in temporary accommodation just incase that makes a difference to the answer.
Including a picture just to show how old this this thing is, I’ve never seen anything like it before. Also this flat is only electric, no gas anywhere.
https://ibb.co/nMsC5zc https://ibb.co/F5mYq9p
Thanks in advance and sorry if the format isn’t great.

Just a little something I cooked up this morning. Plan on writing another stupid one-shot based in magic later on today while the idea is still fresh in my mind. Then probably jump over to the other story based in a different universe (not the Dino Mommies one...yet) since it's been a hot minute from when I last touched that one.
So yeah; got a pretty busy day/weekend planned. Hope you enjoy this little blurb though. Somewhat along the lines of Mr. Mauser story.
~~~~~~~~
Mr. Barrett
Magic. The newest discovery. The reality-bending, mind altering, physics defying energy driving the rapid changes, advancements, and developments of humanity for the past 100 years.
As I lay here in the mountains, surrounded by flora and fauna both native and foreign, my mind wanders back to the early days of magic. Yes, I was there all those years ago. In fact, I was in the prime of my youth fighting an enemy in a faraway land when I felt…well, all of us felt the change.
It was indescribable; my body felt light, my mind sharp, all of my senses felt like they were beyond peak performance. The rest of my team went through similar changes, yet different ones at the same time.
Jim’s muscle mass nearly doubled, as well as his height.
Ngo’s slender build filled out slightly, but his movements were faster. Almost blindingly so.
Our scout, Brody, found his eyes shift and change into a more animal-like design. Similar to a hawk’s, but still maintaining a semblance of humanity within.
This put a slight damper on our mission at the time while we worked to adapt to these sudden changes, but in the end, we still achieved success. It was when we returned that we found out our changes weren’t relegated to us.
In the following years, story after story came out of regular people performing a great many deeds; walking through fire, wading through alligator infested waters, lifting overturned vehicles as if they weighed no more than a couple hundred pounds.
All of it to save lives.
But, with good comes evil. For every great deed there was always, always, some asshole who used their newfound abilities for selfish or terrible means. This led to a restructuring of society. New laws were put in place, as well as agencies and departments with the specific purpose of preventing and punishing those abusing their gifts.
This now balance worked for a while, but it only took twenty years post-discovery for one of humanity’s worst to nearly destroy everything.
Ichimura was his name. A man beaten down by this new society simply because he couldn’t measure up to its expectations. Or so the dossier at the time said.
Truth was; he never liked being shackled to this reality. All its laws, and requirements, expectations, duties, and responsibilities were, in his eyes, unnecessary.
“Why should those with great power be constrained by those with lesser?”
Those were the first words he said to me when I faced him that fateful day. His actions up to that point would make the worst criminals in history look normal in comparison. Swaths of towns and villages laid bare by his magical machinations. Formulas taken from current and former magical and alchemical research, combined with the discoveries of science led down terrifying paths.
Before he drew his final breath through blood-stained lips, he smiled one final time.
“This world is ending, and a new one will take its place. Good luck, American. You do not know the horrors you have unleashed.”
With his dying breath the world around us shuddered. Tears in the fabric of reality appeared all across the globe. Hordes of creatures poured through the gaping wounds. His death was the trigger, and I was the one that pulled it.
Even though no one could have predicted this, I was still discharged from the service and treated as a pariah. Regardless of the fact that the temporary tears were repaired, the monsters that came through eradicated, and the truth of the matter brought to light, I was looked upon as the great calamity.
Whatever. I was close to 45 at the time with a distinguished career and enough money set aside for early retirement. Plus, I still had those physical changes that have yet to fade thanks to the breakthroughs in anti-aging. Enhancements that were needed once more as a new threat arose.
This time it came from beyond the stars. A race of creatures so imbued and saturated with magic that it physically hurt to look at them without magic reduction lenses. A fact they were well aware of and used to their advantage.
They nearly wiped us out after first contact, thinking that lesser creatures like us weren’t worthy of wielding magic. Our early, and somewhat still, reliance on technology for even the most mundane of tasks was anathema to them. Why should you use physical effort or machines when magic can do it easier?
A bunch of lazy fucks is what I think.
Well, we refused to capitulate of course, and they attacked. Their mastery over magic clearly millennia beyond our own; lightning, fire, telekinesis, gravity and more. These Iluthar stymied our attempts to fight back at every turn.
Armor? Like paper. Stealth? Might as well have had strobe lights attached to your body. Magic? Like expecting one drop of water to erode a mountain. Which they did when our landmasses got in their way.
The more we fought, though, the more we learned and adapted. Their senses have limited ranges, there are certain materials they can’t see through. And physics - virtually pointless against magic - still reigns supreme when said magic fails.
Which is something my target is about to realize as soon as she steps out onto the balcony.
I’ve been watching her for a week now, barely moving an inch for fear of being spotted. Dried piss and shit filled my pants and constantly assaulted my nose, but that comes with the job.
My target was an Iluthar known for being exceptionally cruel to not only her human slaves, but also “lesser” Iluthar servants. Not that those worthless bastards mattered since they still treated the slaves like garbage.
Too many times did I bear witness to horrendous acts committed against my fellow humans. Seeing what this bitch was doing though…staying still and waiting was the last thing I wanted to do.
But the mission comes first.
I waited and watched her mansion come alive. According to intel, she should be receiving a new shipment of human slaves today. One of the rare times she steps outside to view the “merchandise.”
I watched as the magic craft floating effortlessly above the ground silently made its way to the gates. After a few moments it was allowed in and continued on the slightly glowing path leading to the front doors. Once there, two Iluthar jumped out and drug the humans out of the back and lined them up for inspection.
Another Iluthar came from inside the mansion, appeared to speak a few words to the driver, and disappeared once more, only to return with the mistress in tow. Perfect.
Calming my breath, I began the cycle to find the natural rest.
Breath in, and out. I pulled lightly on the trigger.
In, and out. The pressure increased.
In…and out. I felt the trigger hit the wall.
In……...BOOM.
The sound rattled throughout the mountains. My ears rang for a split-second until they healed themselves. The recoil, that oh-so-heavenly “punch” to the face of a 624-plus grain hunk of death being shot out the end of a precision machined barrel, felt good. The smell of chemicals that overwhelmed the piss and shit coating my lower half brought a slight smile to my face.
But the best part of it all, was watching that cunt’s chest cave in.
“Mr. Barrett sends his regards.”