Christmas my little pony coloring pages
For those aware of the pandemic
2012.08.05 23:30 For those aware of the pandemic
We share a common enemy
2016.12.04 22:20 FlaminScribblenaut Happy Hearth's Warming!
Happy Holidays, everypony!
2017.05.17 03:00 nano23823 Inky Rose
A subreddit for the My Little Pony character Inky Rose.
2023.05.30 13:40 Murdockhoward Surly Bridge Club size large for sale
Illegal Smile color Surly Sunrise Handlebars Brooks Cambium c19 saddle Bike has been ridden very little and always stored indoors. It’s in excellent condition. Serviced by New River Bikes in Fayetteville,WV
Bike is located in Oak Hill,WV
Message for pics since this page doesn’t allow them for some reason.
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2023.05.30 13:40 JayneNic Aftercare Questions
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I’m 14 days in and have flaking. Healing great! One eyebrow lost a little color but it’s not too noticeable. I told my girl not to go too dark and we agreed we could do darker at touch up if I want. My questions are: When can I powder them in a bit until touch up? When can I take an actual shower vs bath? When is a good time to start SPF? TIA! Pic included of my before and after at first session. submitted by JayneNic to microblading [link] [comments]
2023.05.30 13:37 zDaniXx_ What do I do after changing my boot drive?
I got a new PC and I wanted to keep all my files, so I switched the drive on the new PC (the one with Windows installed) with the drive from the old PC (the one with Windows installed and all my files and program data) but now when I boot up my PC, I hear a weird grinding-like sound for some seconds and my monitor seems a little bit blurry and the colors are too contrasty. Did I mess something up? Is my PC now fried up? What do I need to do? And if it isn't okay to switch them up, how can I clone everything to my new PC including program data?
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2023.05.30 13:35 gingereno Daily "Earn an Achievement in Game Pass" - CHICORY: A COLORFUL TALE - "Helpful" (+1 more)
If you like this post, or think others would find it helpful please upvote and/or comment to both provide me with feedback and improve visibility.
TODAY'S ACHIEVEMENT CAN BE ACQUIRED IN MERE MINUTES (1-2)
Everyday at or before work I play a short game session on Game Pass with the focus of getting an achievement; I usually
play the newest title on the service, and sometimes I wish I had known which achievement(s) would come up when, and how far in. That's what I'm doing here, so hopefully some find it helpful.
Today I played CHICORY: A COLORFUL TALE
developed by Greg Lobanov
(Published by "Finji"). It's a 2D top-down adventure game where you play an small cartoon dog in a world that needs the color drawn back into it. It's a very cute game with emphasis on helping NPCs (who seem to be all named after food) and coloring, with things like combat being reserved for boss fights (which are in the Bullet Hell genre more than anything else). HOWLONGTOBEAT
: ~9.5 hours
(critical path) to 21 hours
If you'd like an already existing achievement guide, you can use the PlayStation guide
, since this title only released on Xbox today. As far as I know, the Achievements are the same from platform to platform.
Onto the achievement...
Achievement #1: "Helper"
Once you launch the game begin a new game (naming your character as your favorite food). Begin cleaning the room you're in, shortly thereafter a crisis ensues and you will leave the room to go find someone to help. At the end of a hallway you'll find a brush lying on the ground. Interact with it, and pick it up; ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED.
Now, how long can you continue enjoying Chicory
before running into another achievement? Well, actually you can get quite a ways into the story. Here's how much you can do (as far as I discovered):
Setting Yourself Up for the Next Achievement:
]: I explored a little bit around the map and talked to NPCs, but I wasn't exhaustive, as a result there's always the chance I missed an achievement that you could accidentally discover. For my experience, I was able to continue on outside the main tower you start the game in, and play the storyline until you return to said tower after a first boss battle.
So there's quite a lot of gaming to do if you just want to check out Chicory
, including a boss battle and coloring in the world.
A tip to help with coloring: hold the color trigger to fill in
the space you're brush is occupying on screen.
Thoughts on Chicory: A Colorful Tale
The game seems charming, in its own way. It definitely seems appropriate for younger audiences (if any of you are looking for such titles
), even though the boss battle did have fairly complex mechanics for younger (or newer) gamers.
It reminded me of old Super Nintendo games I played as a youth, mostly due to the top-down angle the game is played at, in it's adventuring style; and the text-based/reading aspect for NPC interaction.
Overall, I don't think I'll play Chicory
again, but that's just because it's not the kind of game I'm into at this stage in my life, but so far, it seemed like a solid game. Though, it being so small a development team, I do wonder if there are any significant bugs/glitches.
That's it, that's all. Hopefully the achievement guide was helpful for you to get that sweet sweet 50 Microsoft Rewards points using Game Pass' Quests, but also to allow you to know how far along the game you can go safely without popping unwanted achievements.
I have two similar previous posts, one on Railway Empires 2
, the other on Cassette Beasts
. I was going to do Massive Chalice
today, but seeing a new entry on the Game Pass service, I had to give it a go first. Maybe that'll be tomorrow's game I try...
Happy hunting, gamers.
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2023.05.30 13:34 writerstephen [WTS] Pilot 823, Edison Comet
Two amazing pens up for sale today that I wanted to love and just didn’t. 1. Pilot Custom 823
Amber color, B nib. Wonderful pen, but just isn’t my jam. Inked once with Tsuki-Yo and used sparingly. Perfect B condition. $200 shipped firm; $220 if you want the large box and unopened bottle of Pilot Blue ink. 2. Edison Comet
Beautiful Seaspray (I think) colorway with swirls of blue and gray. A2 condition; inked once with Wearingeul Phantom of the Opera and mostly set aside. A little small for me and doesn’t fit my weird grip. Converter and original box included. Asking $120 shipped. Price break if you take both pens.
CONUS only, PayPal only. Please comment before PM. verification
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2023.05.30 13:28 Wolfstrong1995 Podcast with Outer Wilds narrative designer is LIVE - with questions from this subreddit!!!
HAPPY 4-YEAR ANNIVERSARY EVERYONE!
(Yeah this is me pretending I've planned this all along 🤣)
I'm super excited to say that, as promised earlier this month, my podcast with Outer Wilds' narrative designer Kelsey Beachum is now LIVE!
You can listen to the episode here
As I had also promised, this special episode includes questions from this subreddit, based on the most popular comments from this post
. Thank you guys so, SO much for sending through so many questions for me to ask Kelsey - I wish I could have asked them all. I'm a huge OW fan myself, and I can't begin to describe how amazing it felt to chat with her for about an hour.
Y'all are the most positive, supportive and loving community I've found on this website. I hope you enjoy this little gift of mine to you – it isn't much, but if it helps you re-live through some of your fondest memories of Outer Wilds, consider me happy!
Also, if you like my format and style, please stick around for more episodes of The Indie Diarist. I could really do with some lovable listeners like you. 💛
See you at the Eye, Hearthians! ::')
Some links of mine as I blast off to the Eye:
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2023.05.30 13:26 ath0rus ADS-B setup
So my flightradar24 trial ended and I was thinking of renewing it when I realized that it would be a waste of money as I don't use it that often. Then I realized i have a SDR that could do the job. After a little bit of research I found this page RTL-SDR Tutorial: Cheap ADS-B Aircraft RADAR
. My questions are: Whats the best piece of software for viewing ADS-B Data and can I use my current dipole setup
(tuned to the frequency)
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2023.05.30 13:21 barb4ry1 Bookclub: Q&A with Steven Raaymakers, the author of A Canticle of Two Souls (RAB's book of the month in June)
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In June, we'll be reading A Canticle of Two Souls
by Steven Raaymakers (u/RaaymakersAuthor
Bingo squares: u/RaaymakersAuthor
- can you tell us what new Bingo squares does it fit?
Fantasy / Dark Fantasy SCHEDULE:
- May 30 - Q&A (I'm leaving on Holidays today, and won't be able to post it at the beginning of the month)
- June 16 - Midway Discussion
- June 30 - Final Discussion
Q&A Thank you for agreeing to this Q&A. Before we start, tell us a little about yourself?
I am a lawyer and indie fantasy author from New Zealand, with a great love for Soulsborne video games, reading, and movies. What brought you to fantasy? What do you appreciate about it?
I have enjoyed the genre since I was old enough to read, and Reddit is a great place to bring a truly diverse group of fans together. Fantasy
is wholesome and everyone is generally super polite and enthusiastic about books. Who are your favorite current writers and who are your greatest influencers?
Good question. Most of my favourite authors have passed away, but Mark Lawrence is a damned good one that’s still kicking. Stephen Erikson is also phenomenal. In the scifi realm, I love Dmitri Glhukovsky, author of the Metro 2033 series.
As for influences: JRR Tolkien, Brandon Sanderson, Gene Wolfe, Kentaro Miura, and Stephen King have all inspired me and my writing. And those Soulsborne games, of course. Can you lead us through your creative process? What works and doesn’t work for you? How long do you need to finish a book?
I am an outliner. I usually think of an ending and sketch the story out from there. I am also someone that underwrites, meaning I actually add a lot of words while editing my first draft. My writing is very fast-paced, which I really like as it ensures there is no bloat and little chance for boredom. How would you describe the plot of A Canticle of Two Souls if you had to do so in just one or two sentences?
A young boy with a sentient blade teams up with a girl who can hear and manipulate emotions. They join together and find out the truth about themselves and their enemies. What subgenres does it fit?
Some readers say it borders on grimdark. It could be dark fantasy too, depending on how people define it. How did you come up with the title and how does it tie in with the plot of the book?
One of my favourite books of all time is A Canticle for Liebowitz, so the title is a nod to that. Fun fact: my current boss asked about this very connection in my job interview, so that was cool.
As for how it ties into the story: Warchildren are people who can hear emotions. There is a lot of musical imagery in my books, and the two souls are the protagonists. This book is essentially a song about those two characters and their tale. What inspired you to write this story? Was there one “lightbulb moment” when the concept for this book popped into your head or did it develop over time?
The very first idea of this story began as a choose-your-own-adventure gamebook which I wrote when I was 16. By the time I sat down to write a novel, I was 24 and the entire story had morphed into what it is now. This book didn’t have a lightbulb moment, but my next ones did. If you had to describe the story in 3 adjectives, which would you choose?
Violent, meaningful, metal Would you say that A Canticle of Two Souls follows tropes or kicks them?
It absolutely follows a few tropes, but I (and my readers) do think it twists a lot of tropes into something new. Who are the key players in this story? Could you introduce us to A Canticle of Two Souls protagonists/antagonists?
Raziel is a 14 year old orphan (a big trope, I know, but I did something with it) who has quite serious trauma and consequent mental health issues. Alicia is a girl with a tough exterior hiding some past trauma as well. They really need friends and support, and eventually learn to trust one another throughout the story. Ultio is Raziel’s sentient sword, a real mean son-of-a-b**ch and the big bad guy. As a companion on the quest, this puts the three characters in constant conflict with eachother. Have you written A Canticle of Two Souls with a particular audience in mind?
Not really. Some readers compare the tone of the book to Berserk. It is a very serious book, as I enjoy meaningful fantasy with a darker tone. The book contains violence but no SA. Alright, we need the details on the cover. Who's the artist/designer, and can you give us a little insight into the process for coming up with it?
I am a retired artist with a ton of art friends. One of my closest is Reffelia, a highly-talented artist and wonderful person. Her instagram is here: https://www.instagram.com/_reffelia_
I sketched what I wanted, basing the style on the Witcher 3 steelbook artwork, and finalised the cover design myself. What was your proofreading/editing process?
I proofread the work a dozen times on my laptop, then printed the whole thing out and scribbled on every single page, sometimes on the back of them too. As I said before, I add a lot of text in my edits. My final edit was completed by a professional editor. What are you most excited for readers to discover in this book?
The setups and payoffs. There are some tiiiny details which you will gloss over in Book 1 which setup stuff in Book 3. A reread would reveal a lot. Can you, please, offer us a taste of your book, via one completely out-of-context sentence?
Horror and terror rode through the ranks, invisible beasts striking deep into every man’s heart.
2023.05.30 13:12 a_lot_of_aaaaaas What is the purpose?
I am thinking about a payed plan because I really like leonardo. However I am thinking about using it to make money from it.
I have watched YouTube videos and read information. 100% of all of those seem to be commercials for print on demand sites and the way they advice selling AI digital art are not realistic at all.
I have fun creating wierd images like Harry Potter in a spoderman suit. But that seem to be it. It's fun. But that is it and I can not believe people will pay $48 per month just for having some fun. I would pay $100 for it as a stand alone program though just for fun. But monthly?
So my question is: what do you do with it besides, nothing? I almost feel like I am missing something here. I created some art pieces as templates for my own art. However the templates look perfect and there is no way to make it better with my own art skills. So why do the effort and create art that is less beautifull?
I thought of creating icons for phones but it is not advanced enough for that and would only be used for inspiration. Wich is good but I can use Google for inspiration.
I tried creating sketchup assets to use in sketchup or rendered images. However there is now way to get it in the right dimensions or angles you want.
I tried creating coloring pages for my kids which is fun but again I can do the same by using Google.
We can create the most beautifull art with AI, but for what purpose?
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2023.05.30 13:12 forgottenasylum Trivia Tuesday! Get a chance to win gems
2023.05.30 13:02 tomimendoza AEGIS - An OnK FanFiction
I know it's not exactly fan art, but it's the most fitting for this kind of thing. Another fanfiction has it as its flair when it was posted here. Anyway, this is my output for the OnK fanfic train. I hope you guys enjoy! The link to the fanfiction.net page will be at the bottom.
*** With the rise of violence against celebrities also comes the rise of elements that protect against them. A rookie agent finds himself assigned to a famous idol with a promise to defend. And what was supposed to be a training assignment would eventually grow to so much more.
The young man grumbled as he trudged the halls of his home towards his father’s office. His hand would rake through his black hair in his face in annoyance while his two emerald eyes with four-point star-shaped irises focused forward. He already knew what was gonna happen and he wished he could refuse. He had been hoping to devote his time to honing his gaming skills with the hope of maybe one day joining a pro-E-sports team. But, because his father was an old man with a small scope of the modern world, he laughed and told him to do something real with his life. And something real meant taking over the family business one day.
Kurosawa Security Services, or simply KSS, is a Japanese family-owned security company based in Kyoto although they have offices all over the country and even abroad. KSS provides everything from security guards for convenience stores to close protection agents for top government figures. They can also provide security consultation and training. The service is rated as the best Japan has to offer with highly trained agents. KSS agents regularly train with the police and military elements like the Security Police and Special Forces Group. And in rare occasions, they would even train with the US Secret Service abroad. KSS is also the best because of the long history of the organization which dates back to the feudal era when Kurosawa Saitō picked up the sword and protected the local Daimyo from an attack. In other words, they had a long time to hone their craft.
Now, what makes a security company like KSS so big in a country where crime is almost non-existent? Isn’t Japan a safe nation? Those would be your first mistakes if you thought of them. It doesn’t matter which part of the world you’re on, good and evil exist everywhere. And good must be protected from evil. That’s why KSS exists.
And soon enough, the company will be in Akio’s hands when it's his father’s time to retire. That’s how the system works, despite what he thinks of it. So, now his ultimate tests will begin. His first assignment.
After walking for what seemed like hours he reached a pair of large doors. He knocked on them and was asked to come in by a voice on the other side, so he complied. Entering, he was greeted with a fairly large office for only one man. And that man was currently seated behind a desk reading through some papers.
“Hey, Dad,” He greeted as he sat down on one of the chairs before across from him.
Kurosawa Tadao put the papers down and then looked at his son before smiling. He was an aging man with black hair that was already greying and blue eyes that had four-point star-shaped irises.
“Hey, Son! How’re ‘ya doing?” He asked.
“Just fine. I was finally getting my KDR up in Black Ops and I was planning on getting my skills up in CSGO later. But, here we are,” Akio answered.
“Staying inside is not good for your body you know.”
“I planned to play basketball tomorrow and I have band with the boys this weekend.”
“It’s still unhealthy because it’s exactly anything productive. You’re 17, Son, you need to start shaping up for your career,” Tadao said.
“I’ve been shaping it up since I was five,” Akio muttered.
“And that’s why we’re here right now. Your first assignment, son! It’s the moment of truth! Aren’t you excited?” Tadao asked with a wide grin as he picked up a folder from the side.
“No, not really,” Akio answered flatly.
“Well, maybe you’ll be excited once you find out who I’m assigning you to. Spoiler alert, she’s an idol,” He said with a grin, whispering that last part as he handed him the file.
“I’m not into idols, Dad,” He said flatly as he took the file.
“Your little brother a good chunk of this company’s personnel, and hell, a good chunk of the population are though,” He commented.
“That doesn’t make sense. Everyone can have different interests. And Goro, well, I guess being tied to a hospital bed for years does that to you,” He said sadly.
“You’re one weird kid, you know.”
“Well, I was raised by the likes of you, Dad,” Akio retorted with a sly grin which made his father laugh.
“Well, you got me there,” He chuckled and promptly silenced himself to let his son read.
“Hoshino Ai? Never heard of her. Although I admit she is pretty cute,” He mumbled as read through the file with her picture on it. He took in her personal information like date of birth, age, physical appearance, and all the usual things. And then he got to a part that listed her status— “What the fuck?! She’s pregnant?!”
“Language, Akio!” Tadao scolded. “Anyway, officially, she’ll be taking a break from showbiz for a while due to ill health. Actually, she’s pregnant and they’re trying to keep it under wraps. Bad for business, because a lot of fans are a bunch of lonely losers, they’ll drop her just because she has kids.”
“Language, Dad,” Akio retorted and shook his head. “Well, teen pregnancy is bad, but it’s unfair for her to be hated for that reason.”
“Yeah, the life of a celebrity is a lot shittier than most people would think. I know, your mother was a singer, she dealt with that too when we were found out,” Tadao said with a frown before smiling a bit. “She
“Please don’t tell me about your romances, Dad,” Akio cringed. “Anyway, Hoshino-sama will be my protectee, huh?”
“Yes. She’ll be heading here with her management agency soon to settle the contract. And then you’ll be heading to the countryside where she can lay low until she gives birth. That’s the basics of it.”
“Alright. Babysit a pregnant teenager and keep her from doing anything dumb. Should be easy enough,” He said.
“Do not underestimate the dangers tied to the entertainment world, Akio,” Tadao reminded. “As I’ve said, a lot of them are a bunch of lonely losers or generally just of questionable
character. Some of them will go to great lengths just for attention. Fans can get really wacky after all. It’s already happened before. Not to mention, all the snakes in the industry. Someone might want to up their game so they think about eliminating the competition. You get the point.”
“I’m very aware, Dad, don’t worry,” He assured then sighed. “Just doing this and my studies at the same time? What am I gonna do?”
“That’s rich coming from someone who was planning on just lazing around all day. Besides, you’ve been homeschooling for more than a year already, right? I’m sure you can get a read in every day without compromising your job.”
“Well, it’s not impossible, but it’s gonna suck,” He said then sighed. “Alright, I’ve got this. Not much of a choice anyway. Anything else I should know?”
“Yeah. Remember this, you do not ever
let your protectee out of your sight. Wherever she goes, you go. That being said, don’t be too overbearing, and make sure to give her room to breathe. She is a woman, she will want her space. Also, try not to set such a tight atmosphere. Try being her friend, and she’ll be easier to work with. Tomita will meet you tomorrow too to evaluate you. You’ll also be reporting to him your progress during your task.”
“Noted, Dad. In that case,” Akio stood then positioned himself directly in front of the table before bowing. “I shall see this task to the end.”
Idol music was not his cup of tea and Hoshino Ai was a complete stranger to him till that moment. He’d spend a whole week with the pre-preparations with one of the senior agents until it was time to meet the latest customers. Then he would meet Hoshino Ai for the first time and they’d make their first impressions of one another.
“Are you really sure about this?”
“We’re going to need a shield just in case. Lot’s of wackos around here. Besides, we’ve already agreed to meet.”
“It’s just, there’s a lot of shady dealings in the security world.”
“Are we any better? Besides, KSS is the best this country can offer. I also know the company head personally too, we went to high school together, and he owes me. We’ll be just fine.”
“I didn’t understand any of that, but okay!”
“Never change, Ai…”
How do you keep a secret from the world? Simple: you lie. You lie a lot. But then you realize it’s not so simple and every day is spent with fear that everything might fall apart. Just trying to get anywhere was a massive undertaking. For example, right now. Two adults and a pregnant teen in a car. Aside from the teen pregnancy, there’s nothing strange at all about it. But if you knew who the car’s passengers were, then you’d immediately understand.
After a couple of hours of driving (making occasional turns to make sure they weren’t followed and consequently getting lost a couple of times) they finally reached their destination which was a large estate in the outskirts of Kyoto. A guard met them at the gate, and after the driver talked and showed some credentials, they were let in. It took another minute or two until they reached the house where a group was waiting for them. The car group got out of their vehicle with the house group greeting them shortly after. A man with short blonde hair and yellowish-brown eyes underneath some shades stepped forward and led the group.
“Ichigo-san, you’re still about as ugly as when I last saw you,” Tadao greeted with a cheeky grin as he approached.
“Tadao-san, you’re clearly the most repulsive one here. I see you still haven’t taken my advice to get your face fixed,” Ichigo greeted with a snarky expression as he also approached.
Once close enough, they locked hands for a shake before pulling each other in for a hug.
“It’s nice to see you again, friend! How’re you doin', man? No troubles getting here?” Tadao asked.
“I’m just fine. Getting here was a lot smoother than we thought. But we are exhausted,” Ichigo replied.
“I imagine. Remember that time in Second Year when we bought booze with fake IDs and we had to run for it?”
“Ha, how can I forget?! I was terrified the cops would get us!”
As the two men shared stories and laughed, everyone else present could not help but be astonished at how casual the two were being. It almost was like this wasn’t a business meeting.
“Yeah, those were the days,” Tadao laughed and turned to the other two people to address them. “Before we continue any further, allow me to introduce myself. I am Kurosawa Tadao, head of Kurosawa Security Services, and I welcome you all to my home. It’s nice to meet you!”
He then stepped toward the next person. She was a rather tall woman with long strawberry-blonde hair and pinkish-brown eyes.
“And you must be Miyako, his wife, yes?” He asked.
“Yes, I am,” She said with a polite smile as they shook hands.
“You know, I’ve always wondered how someone with a face like his could get married. But here we are,” He joked earning a laugh from her.
“I sometimes wonder why I decided to marry him too,” She commented and they both laughed.
“Huh? What?” Ichigo said but was ignored.
Then, Tadao moved to the last person. She was a short girl with long violet hair with matching eyes that have stars in them. But her most distinct feature was the bulge in her abdomen showing her pregnancy. Moreover, she looked like she wasn’t even 18. This observation made his gut wrench due to feeling pity for this poor girl’s bad decision. Regardless, he put on his best smile and took her hand.
“And you must be Hoshino Ai,” He greeted. “I’ve heard all about you, but since I’m the stereotypical old man, I’m not into your music. Regardless of that, and after listening to a couple of songs, I think you’re doing some very great work in your field.”
Her lips curved into a smile that cured souls as her eyes seemed to shimmer. Tadao kept himself from reacting, but at that moment he knew why she was so popular.
“Thank you so much, Tadao-san! You know, I don’t think I’m that popular to begin with but I’m always so happy to hear that someone like what I do!” She said happily.
He chuckled a bit. “I used to be in a band in middle school and high school, so I still try to stay up to date with the latest musical trends these days. Although, I still don’t know much. I mostly get my info on that from my own agents.”
He glanced to the side followed by Ai shortly after to see three younger agents standing stiffly as they tried to ignore them. They knew exactly who she was. All three of them have her as their phone’s lock screen wallpaper. And it’s clear that they wanted to talk to her, but they couldn’t. And even if they could, they didn’t know how. Ai giggled in amusement while Tadao just stared.
“Anyway, now that introductions have been made, let’s go inside where it’s more comfortable. I know you’re here for business, so let’s dive right in. We’ve also prepared snacks and refreshments inside in case you want some. Ichigo, my valet will take care of your car, so give him the keys please,” Tadao said as he gestured for them to follow.
“Do you have ice cream?” Ai asked.
“We sure do!”
“Yay! Let’s go!”
After Ichigo handed over the keys to a valet, Tadao began leading them into his home with the trio following shortly after. But before that, a mischievous thought entered Ai’s mind and she acted quickly. She suddenly turned to look at the trio of agents who tensed up even more under her gaze. Worse, they realized that she was up to no good just from her grin. But before they could even speculate what she was up to, she suddenly did her signature love heart hand pose with a smile. In a flash, the three agents felt their knees go weak in the presence of such moe cuteness that they struggled to stay upright as they covered their mouths to silence their ecstatic screams. Satisfied with her handiwork, Ai giggled as she left the scene of the crime.
“Um, are they gonna be alright?” Ichigo asked nervously as he saw one of them falling over.
“They’ll be fine.”
They entered the huge house and led them through a series of hallways that were decorated with all sorts of interesting stuff. One of them was some sort of cannon on a towed carriage, except, aside from one big barrel, it’s got multiple little ones arranged in a circle with a crank.
“Kurosawa-san, what’s that?” Ai asked.
“Oh, this? This is a Model 1874 Gatling Gun. It fires a .45-70 caliber round from top-loaded 20-round box magazines with a rate of fire of about a thousand rounds per minute, although, it really depends on how fast you can crank it. It was one of the most revolutionary weapons ever designed and it changed the battlefield forever. This specific weapon here was used by the Imperial Army against revolting samurai during their last stand in the Battle of Mount Shiroyama, the last action of the Satsuma Rebellion,” He explained. “Sometimes I wonder what the samurai were thinking in their last moments just before they were all gunned down.”
“Wow,” Ai whispered in awe.
“Indeed. I don’t even know where my father dug up this gun,” He said before tracing across the black-painted barrels of the old weapon.
“That’s so cool!” She exclaimed happily then fished out her phone from her hoodie pocket. “Can I take a picture with it?”
“Ai, we’re here in business and the man’s likely very busy, so let’s not take anymore—” Ichigo said but was cut off.
“Sure thing! Our meeting is the only thing I have on my schedule today, so I’m basically free to do anything!” Tadao interjected with a wide smile as she took her phone.
What followed next was a comedic scene which was basically an old man doting on his granddaughter while he took pictures of her doing cute things. Meanwhile, everyone else present just stared with blank expressions.
“So much for not being into idols,” Ichigo muttered.
“These are so good! Thank you so much, Kurosawa-san!” She thanked him with a wide smile after going over the pictures.
“You’re very welcome! And you know, we’ve got a lot of goodies in this house, maybe you’d like to take some pictures with them too?” He offered.
“I’d love to!” She squealed.
“Mhmm!” Someone cleared their throat.
Looking in that direction, they saw a young man dressed in a nice business suit who was basically a younger version of Tadao. He approached them with his hands in his pockets and regarded them with a straight expression.
“You’re getting off track here, Dad. We’re still conducting a business,” He said as a matter of factly. “And what happened to ‘no touching of the expensive decor’?”
“Oh come on, son, do you honestly believe I can refuse that?” Tadao complained as he gestured to Ai who maintained a happy expression as she looked at the photos.
“Don’t enable her, Dad. Ma’am, please stop touching the gun, it’s very old and very expensive,” He said.
“Ai, get off of it,” Ichigo ordered.
“Aw, okay,” She said sadly as she backed off.
“Sorry for the trouble, but this stuff is crazy expensive. And oh, I’m Kurosawa Akio, by the way. It’s a pleasure to meet all of you,” He greeted with a polite smile.
“This is my son. He’ll be taking care of the business one day, so I’m bringing him along more now,” Tadao said.
Another round of handshakes was exchanged as the group introduced themselves to Akio. Ai expected the tone and body language of a fan holding himself back, the same kind she’s gotten used to seeing, but was rather surprised when he shook her hands normally with nothing but politeness in his eyes. Strange, now she’s curious. Akio on his part thought that she was a rather normal-looking girl, except for the bulging stomach, and didn’t find anything very special from just looking at her.
“Sorry for messing around. It’s just a really cool-looking thing!” Ai said.
“It sure is, ‘can’t argue with that. They don’t make weapons like these anymore these days. It’s all just big bombs now, which is boring,” Akio remarked.
“I don’t think death and destruction are supposed to be nice to see,” Miyako remarked.
“Exactly,” Tadao stated with a firm voice. “And that’s what we strive for in KSS. Every day must always be boring. Now come on, we’ve got business to attend to.” He said before turning and walking away.
“Is he always like this?” Miyako asked with a sweatdrop, noting the man’s sudden change of face.
“You’ll get used to it,” Both Ichigo and Akio replied in a flat tone.
They finished the walk toward their destination which was a conference room inside the house. The place was quite spacious and cozy looking, especially since it has a fireplace. They all immediately took their seats with KSS taking one side of the table and Ichigo Productions sitting opposite of them.
“Snacks will be brought in a little bit, so let’s get down to business to business shall we,” Tadao said as he placed a briefcase on the table and pulled out some papers. “By the way, everything we talk about will not leave this room, you can trust us. I think I also know the reason why you need an extra pair of hands. Your reason for getting a bodyguard is because you’re worried that you’ll be attacked like that idol that got stabbed recently, yes?”
They all nodded at that. It was already a month old, but the memory of it was still fresh on everyone’s minds, especially since it was covered on national news.
An idol named Hirose Keiko, who was pretty popular and only 16 like Ai, was recently murdered by a crazy fan in her own home. The autopsy report stated that the cause of death was cardiac arrest from severe bleeding after being stabbed three times and that she died in minutes.
The police captured the killer before he could jump off a bridge and took him in for questioning. He said that a Twitter post showing Keiko being all friendly with some guy somewhere made people think she had gotten a boyfriend. This enraged him because he felt betrayed by her actions, therefore he stalked her and plotted her murder for weeks. So, it was pretty awkward for him to find out that Keiko’s supposed boyfriend was actually her cousin and she was at a family get-together at that time.
The news shocked everyone in the country and many celebrities started taking their personal security more seriously. Ichigo was worried for Ai, and Ai was a bit scared herself. She knew Keiko, they did some collaborations together in the past, and she was upset she couldn’t attend her funeral. So, Ichigo Productions, though a bit cash-strapped, decided that it would be a good idea to have some form of security with them to help out in the long run. Especially now that Ai was pregnant… they couldn’t stomach the thought of some deranged lunatic stabbing her to death like what happened to Keiko.
“I don’t think I can forget that. I knew the girl and her agency, they were good people. I hope that bastard gets the chair,” Ichigo muttered.
“You and me both. And don’t worry, we’ll make sure nothing ever happens to you,” Tadao assured. “Alright, now, how do you want to be protected?”
“We just need someone with us to keep the creeps away, especially one that can lie low with us. Nothing flashy at all,” Ichigo answered.
“Hmm, I understand what you want. One or two agents on you at all times at least, covering your front and back. They’ll be in plain clothes too so as to not draw attention. Okay, I’ve got a lot of agents to spare for that kind of job,” Tadao said, as he wrote on a piece of paper.
“What else is there?” Ichigo asked.
“We’re gonna brief you on how we operate and how we intend to do this. None of them are hard to follow at all. The gist is that you need to tell us everything, your schedules, contacts, extra activities, etcetera.”
“So, I’ll basically be followed around everywhere?” Ai asked.
“Basically, yes. But the key difference is that it’ll be by people you can trust. However, that doesn’t mean we’ll be poking around your daily life and infringing on your space every day. We’ll create a system in which you’re safe but still comfortable. In fact, we even have methods to protect you without you or anyone seeing us, but that’s really expensive though,” Tadao explained. “We know our boundaries too, Hoshino-sama, you don’t have to worry.”
“Hmm,” Ai hummed as she considered his words before another thought occurred to her. “Will you kill people?”
“Only if they really
force us to. Every agent has a loaded gun with him, but we’re also trained in ways to stop an attacker with non-lethal force. Besides, one of our tactics is that by simply being there, we can discourage anyone from trying anything funny. As I’ve said, the best days for us are the most boring ones.”
“What’s the price tag?” Miyako asked.
“Despite the low elements, you’re still looking at 500,000 yen per month. But…” He trailed off. “But… due to my debt to you, Ichigo, I’ve decided to give you half that price for six months. This is paid like a subscription service where you have to pay every month. Failure to pay means immediate termination of services.”
“Is there anything else?” Ichigo asked.
“There are a bunch more details that you need to know. Legality, protocols, company policy, and all that. But, there’s one detail that I threw in as a condition for this,” Tadao said then placed a hand on Akio’s shoulder who was sitting to his right. “My son will be the one to run point of your protection detail. This’ll also act as his first test, to prove his skill as a protection agent.”
“Although I’m inexperienced, I’m quick to learn and adapt, and I’m ready to take on whatever task is needed from me,” Akio said politely.
Ichigo and Miyako frowned at the prospect of being given someone who was inexperienced in the field. But if he was the son of the guy who runs the place, then he should be pretty good, right? Besides, this is possibly the best deal they’ll ever get, and they weren’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth.
“Alright, that’s fine,” Ichigo said.
“I’m okay with it,” Ai said.
“Although, Akio will be running point so you’ll see him the most often, another rookie agent will also be there to learn too. He’ll be number two. A senior agent will also be dropping by occasionally to check on them and evaluate their performance, although you don’t need to pay him. And in case things get really bad, emergency services and other agents won’t be too far to assist,” Tadao added.
“Ah, alright,” Ichigo said.
“Now, for the rest of everything.”
They would spend the next thirty minutes getting into the details of how everything would be under their care. Snacks and refreshments were brought in at that time with Ai receiving a pint of ice cream, making her very happy. They got into some legal conditions that were implemented to protect both sides. They also got into how the protection detail would work and what to do under certain situations. And of course, company policy.
One such policy is that the client can sue the company for up to 30 million yen for disclosing any secrets entrusted to them without permission. And although KSS can definitely pay that amount, their reputation would be tarnished and they’d lose even more money. That was a fact that allowed Ichigo Productions to rest easier. Ai’s pregnancy needed to remain under wraps.
After a few more minutes and a couple more things were clarified, they finally moved on to the last piece of the puzzle. Tadao opened up his briefcase and pulled out one last set of papers.
“This is the contract. What’s is just a summary of everything we talked about, but I suggest you read it carefully so you’re not missing anything,” Tadao said.
Ichigo Productions took the document and carefully read through it to make sure they were not missing anything. It took another five minutes, but they confirmed that everything was in place.
“A service that tells you everything and makes you read the contract first? Finally!” Ichigo joked.
“We’re the guys that protect the Emperor, not some shady organization! We’ve got a reputation to uphold!” Tadao stated. “Anyway, if nothing is amiss, sign your name and seal on the space provided and we are officially under your employ.”
“Everything’s here. Let’s seal the deal,” Ichigo said.
He grabbed a pen that was provided to him and signed his name on the line at the bottom then stamped his seal on the side. Miyako did the same thing after him. And finally, Ai filled out the last line with her name and seal and even drew a little heart on it. Tadao took the document and looked through it before putting it down and giving them a smile.
“You are now under the protection of Kurosawa Security Services! With Hachiman, the divine protector of Japan, guiding our hands, you will not have to worry about anything as long as we are around! Rest assured that we will take care of you. And anyone that tries to harm you will die a horrible death!” He proclaimed.
“That’s… oddly specific,” Ichigo remarked.
“If you get hurt, we’ll cover the expenses of your medical bill. If you die under our watch, which you won’t, we’ll offer a full refund to your relatives, and we’ll even avenge you. That’s our policy, to treat our clientele as if they are our family,” He added.
“That’s very nice,” Miyako said.
“Only the best we provide our clients,” Tadao said. “And aside from giving you a copy of the documents, this concludes our business. Thank you for choosing our services. We promised not to disappoint.”
“We’ll be watching closely then.”
Both groups then stood up and gave each other one last bout of handshakes to truly seal the contract that was just signed.
“I’ll make sure your men get tickets to one of my concerts in the future!” Ai said and looked at Akio. “Especially you, Akio-san.”
“Oh, that’s very kind of you, Hoshino-sama. But, I’m not into idol music,” He replied politely.
“Please excuse my son. We know he’s a weirdo,” Tadao jokingly said.
“I ain’t weird, Dad. I don’t hate idol music but I don’t exactly like it either. I just like other things,” Akio stated.
“It’s not impossible, but it’s a first for us. Everyone your age we’ve met is into idols,” Saitou said. “Looks like you’re the 10% we didn’t see coming.”
“Please just take it as less worry for you, since I won’t be prying for your attention all the time. I’ll always keep a respectful distance. I promise.”
“That’s all we can ever ask really. Thank you.”
“Now that business is concluded, we can all turn in for the night. But would you like something before you leave? Some more snacks or drinks perhaps? We’ve got a lot here,” Tadao offered but Ichigo shook his head.
“No, we’ve already been here too long, we don’t want to overstay our welcome. Besides, it’s late and we’re all tired. We should be getting back now,” he said.
“Alright. In that case, allow us to walk you out while I get the valet to get your car.”
Ichigo Productions prepared to leave while Tadao got on his phone. Ichigo and Miyako started discussing something with each other while Ai simply looked around the room. Her eyes would eventually land on Akio who was looking at his phone. He’d pocket it a moment later and his eyes would land on his protectee’s. She’d flashed him a wide smile, the kind that can captivate any man, while he returned with a simple smile and a nod. Ai began opening her mouth to speak before stopping short when there was a disturbance from Tadao.
“... Really? Alright, I’ll tell them,” He sighed before turning to the group.
“What’s wrong?” Ichigo asked.
Tadao smiled awkwardly. “A small problem just developed on your end.”
They’d find themselves outside again a moment later, watching a scene unfold before them. Ichigo Production’s car, a white rental Toyota Corolla, remained where Ichigo last left it although the hood was open and multiple guys were peering into the engine compartment with flashlights. One agent tried turning the key and starting the ignition, yet the engine remained quiet. A moment later, a middle-aged man with his sleeves rolled up walked up to Tadao while wiping his hands on a rag.
“I think it’s a broken sparkplug, Tadao-san. It just won’t start,” He reported.
“I told you it was broken!” Miyako scolded Ichigo in a hushed voice.
“Do we have spare parts, Hiro-san?” Tadao asked.
“No, we just ran out when our own rides needed maintenance and we haven’t resupplied yet,” He said with a shake of his head. “We can’t run to the shop too because it’s already closed at this time. This thing’s staying here till morning.”
Ichigo and Miyako groaned at their misfortune while the rest of them simply stared indifferently. Tadao then sighed and spoke again.
“Alright. In that case, Hiro-san, please get the van off the driveway and onto the side. We’ll deal with it tomorrow morning. Then please take one of the Land Cruisers and take them back to their hotel. The rest of you are free to leave for home too,” He ordered.
“Hai, Kurosawa-sama!” Everyone replied.
“Tadao-san, are you sure? This is probably too much—” Ichigo began but stopped when Tadoa raised a hand.
“It’s fine, I don’t mind at all. Just think of this as me helping a friend in need. And no, you don’t have to pay,” He replied.
Ichigo was unsure but ultimately allowed it and bowed a bit. “Alright, thank you.”
“No problem,” Tadao replied with a shallow nod.
While the adults addressed the issue of their ride, the two kids remained on the side and simply watched. Akio and Ai were still in their teens, so they were kids in the eyes of the adults present.
“So,” Ai began. “What kind of music do you listen to, Kurokawa-san?”
“Uh, I like rock music of all types from pop to death metal. I’ve been listening to them since I was five. And it’s Kurosawa, Hoshino-sama,” He replied, her sudden question and error of his name catching him off guard.
“Ah, really? Ahahaha, I’m so sorry! I'm not very good at memorizing people’s faces!” She laughed jovially.
“Ahaha, I can imagine. Since you probably see so many faces every day, it’s hard to keep track of them all, huh?” He laughed.
“Ah, yeah! It’s a bit of a problem for me, hehe. Sometimes, I even forget the President’s name too, haha!”
He laughed along with her but internally, he was cringing a bit. Does every idol have such an airheaded personality?
“It must be kinda hard for you too, having to work like this when you’re so young,” She remarked.
“Well, this is my first job ever, so it doesn’t seem hard at all right now. That’s definitely gonna change though,” He replied. “But, I don’t think my job will get anywhere as difficult as yours with you having to put up an act all the time. I don’t think I can handle that.”
“Yeah, tell me about it. I really like my job, but sometimes it gets pretty tiring. Taking a break like this is gonna help out a lot!” She said happily before taking a deep breath and looking around. “I think I’ve already said this, but your place is really nice.”
“Mhmm, and this is just our place here in Tokyo. We’re only here now because we need to be closer to some of our clients at the moment. Our main house in Kyoto is even bigger and cooler!” Akio replied.
“You guys are really loaded, huh?”
“For the past few decades, Kurosawa has been branching to other things that make money. We need the cash to pay for our stuff after all. Although, we’re still inferior to zaibatsus like Shinomiya and Shijo (who we provide services to, by the way) but also still better than most.”
“Mhmm, but money still isn’t everything. We try to take a humble approach to things too. Dad doesn’t like spending money on anything that isn’t important and I don’t buy a lot of things myself,” He added and kept his mouth open to continue when he was interrupted.
“Don’t believe him! He eats yakiniku at least once a week!” One of the younger agents stated as he walked by with a bag over his shoulder, likely on his way home.
“Look who’s talking, idiot! You spend the most out of all of us!” He retorted angrily but only got a laugh in response. He turned back to Ai who was holding a hand over her mouth to stifle her giggles, prompting him to sigh in annoyance. “Alright, I admit that part and also I spend a lot quite a lot on video games and band equipment, but only on special occasions. I’m not some pompous rich jerk that throws money around, I promise you.”
“Hmm, alright, I believe you,” She giggled and then thought of something. “You could’ve totally left that part out or outright lied. Why didn’t you?”
“Uh, it was already out, so there’s no point in trying to lie about it anymore. Besides, I don’t believe you deserve to be lied to, Hoshino-sama,” He answered.
Her smile wavered ever so slightly as she processed his answer. I don’t deserve to be… lied to?
“Ai, our ride’s here! Let’s head back to the hotel!” Ichigo called out as one of the company’s Land Cruisers had been brought out to take them.
“I guess we’ll just have to continue this conversation some other time, but it’s been a nice talk. I look forward to working with you, Hoshino-sama,” He said with a wide smile and an outstretched hand.
Ai smiled widely too, her eyes seemingly shimmering brighter as she took his hand and shook it. “Since we’ll be sticking so closely together for a while, you can just call me Ai, Akio-san.”
He blinked. “U-Uh, sure thing, Ai-san.”
“Just Ai,” She clarified.
“Just Ai,” He nodded and smiled widely, happy that she remembered his first know, even if he didn’t know why.
“If that’s what you want, you’re the boss,” Akio remarked, earning another laugh from her. “You have a good night, Ai, and I’ll see you again tomorrow.”
“You too, Akio-san.”
She’d head back to her group a moment later and they were leaving the estate shortly. Akio waved at the car as it drove past him and he could just barely see a human figure waving back through the darkness. As he watched the SUV disappear, he put his hand down and looked up at the sky.
“Wow,” He breathed. “Her eyes are something else.”
He’d retire for the night shortly after without another thought. He’d sleep soundly not knowing that he had just stepped on the path that would define his life.
This is the link
to the ff.net page. Thank you very much for taking the time to read it, and thank you even more if you decide to support it on ff.net! Please also tell me what you think and/or if you have any ideas you'd like to share here or there!
For now, have a great day, and peace out! Veritas vos liberabit. The Truth will set you Free.
submitted by tomimendoza
to OshiNoKo [link] [comments]
2023.05.30 12:59 himmelfried11 Sh***! I fell in love - in the best and worst way at the same time
Advice needed, it's quite a spicy case (and long): Three days ago i met a woman. I already knew that she also has bipolar diagnosis and is a writer, that's why we met. So, we met in the park beside a beautiful pavilion next to a lake. Birds were singing, beautiful late May summer weather, i brought a blanket and we sat down. We immediately started talking about our bipolar experiences and couldn't stop for 5 hours. We agreed and related on so many things. Although our stories are different, there were so many points that were strikingly similar, we almost couldn't believe it. Both of us expressed how relieving and safe it felt talking to each other. We were laughing so much, it started hurting when evening came. We agreed to meet the day after again and did the same thing for a second time. We both were nervous and excited to meet again, but all the anxiety was blown away and replaced by the same feeling of connectedness and safety once we saw each other again. I brought her an unpublished book i wrote during my last mania and she brought me hers. She's a published author and kind of a prodigy, published a very successful book with 19 years old already. This time we started cuddling a little and hugging intimately in the end. She told me that she feels no fear or anxiety when she's with me and i told her the same. I also told her about my fear of falling in love and thus triggering an episode. She told me about her traumatic experience with sexual abuse, we agreed on being super careful with everything that might happen in the future between us. Needless to say, she is beautiful, tender, funny, witty, highly intelligent. The experience really blew me away a bit. I fantasized about having a bipolar girlfriend before, but always thought it to be a bad idea. I've met many other people with bipolar before, but never had such a feeling (nobody so far i was romantically interested in..). I already started noticing that the experience with her is so intense that i had a hard time thinking about anything different. My eating behavior changed, i felt a slight high after meeting her. Alarm alarm. I slept 7 and 6 hours the last two nights, which still is almost ok-ish. Then i read her book yesterday. It's about classical music, my greatest passion.. But not only that, it's about creativity, intuition, love, resistance, the will to change politics and institutions, about pride and anger, mourning and fear. It's a really good book. It touched me so much how sensitive she could write about music, a couple of sentences went right into the heart. I cried reading the last twenty pages. I started dreaming about what could be possible if we two really fell in love with each other. We could do so many things together, we would complement each other so freaking well, it's almost bewildering. All the time i was fully aware of my feelings and reactions, tried not to let go too much, be realistic, be calm, be collected. It works, almost. But, here comes the evil twist: When we met i knew that she was the half-hidden affair of my best friend and roommate for about a year. I knew he wanted to end it for a long time as he is raising a child with his girlfriend, also my roommate. He told me and her that the affair has ended a couple of months ago (the two have a non-monogamous relationship, but his girlfriend asked him to end the affair as she didn't feel comfortable with it anymore). The second day i met the woman she told me that their affair hadn't ended at all. It was ongoing secretly and she said that she still is heavily emotionally invested in it, even though she is very unhappy about him making her an affair. She also told me that she feels no fear with me, but does so with him. We tried to avoid the conversation about him as far as possible, as i don't want to get into some strange middle-position within their affair / relationship. But yeah, i doesn't feel good at all. She is very unhappy, almost heartbroken and from what I know my friend does not really treat her well. At least she doesn't feel it. She feels kind of degraded by remarks of him and also when he talks to me about her i sometimes notice that it's not entirely respectful. To me it feels as if the two have a all but healthy affair, which in some way even interacts with the dynamic of the abuse she told me about. (The latter is my interpretation.)
Soooooooooo, what do I do here?? It's so fucked up, falling in love alone would be a challenge enough, falling in love with a bipolar partner even more so - but: falling in love with a bipolar woman that is the secret affair of my roommate?? I start to feel anger towards him (i asked if he read her book - he said: she writes me so many letters, that's already enough prose i read from her..). He sleeps with this beautiful woman and writer for a year and doesn't even bother to read her novel? Obviously, there is now competition between us and I'm very afraid of what this constellation could turn into in the future. Living with them has provided me with a lot of stability after a horrendous crash-mania that ended one year ago. I was thinking about moving out before, so maybe that's really the best option now. But i didn't want to push it, for concerns about my stability. It's really quite fucked up. I'm in therapy weekly and was to supposed to see my psychiatrist in a couple of days, but today he canceled because he's sick. I'm still far from loosing stability, I'm very calm right now, I even don't feel any pressure or unsurmountable desire to meet her again soon, but I'm shaken by the beautiful experience with her.
I told her about my feelings yesterday and also about my cluelessness as how to proceed. Told her that her and my stability has priority and that i don't want to interfere with what's going on between them. She answered that she doesn't know how to react, but my message made her happy.
Did anybody here ever fall in love with another bipolar person? Is it possible without triggering a mutual (hypo-)manic episode? Should i better run? Go for it? Something in between? Can someone relate to the feeling of mutual understanding, safety and empathy? Bonus question: How do i navigate this opera-like constellation with my friend? He knows about my feelings as well as my concerns, so far no conflict broke out between us, but i can already clearly see how this will turn out if i became manic now. The potential of the situation feels highly volatile.
submitted by himmelfried11
to BipolarReddit [link] [comments]
2023.05.30 12:48 iir21 School is a SCAM
I hate studying. Every time I need to study for a History or a Geography exam, I feel like killing myself. It’s the most boring thing I’ve ever done in my life. I’ll literally forget everything about these two subjects in less than one month after studying them, but I have to pass these two classes in order to finish high school and be able to get into university. The teachers are terrible at explaining, and it doesn’t feel like they’re on the students’ side at all. It takes me like half an hour to read and completely understand two pages of a textbook (I’m a very slow reader), so I don’t know how they expect me to then summarize that, memorize it and do the same thing for all the other content heavy subjects every day. It just feels like a waste of time. Also, as someone who likes to read and wants to be an editor after graduating university (if I even reach that point), I can tell you that some of the textbooks are written in the least student-friendly way possible (especially if they were written by your own teacher…Speaking from experience here), so it’s no wonder it’s hard. Like, d00d, I’m actually the student with the highest grades in English, Latin and Greek from my year (there are only three people in the Greek class, though), but I’m gonna have to repeat the year just because I’m terrible at History and Geography. It would be the second time I’m repeating a year, too (last time was year 3 of middle school), so you can guess I’m looking forward to being a 20-year-old high-schooler who has no friends of his age in class. My last chance to pass those two subjects is less than two weeks away from now, but I have very little hopes of not failing the year. I hate my life. ♡
submitted by iir21
to offmychest [link] [comments]
2023.05.30 12:44 Rainbowsrfun Droplet pt2
2023.05.30 12:43 WithWitandWords Just colored the first double page of my original comic I'm working on. "Sunny Side Down" - inks by Amy Clare and colors by Me.
2023.05.30 12:41 Karevan098 Blue Bliss (Borax Combo) Trip Report
25 years old, 67 kilos.
I recently found out about the existence of this combo to replicate MDMA with this combo that claimed to have less after-effects and no emotional downside so I decided to give it a try.
00:00 I took a whole pill.
00:20 I start to feel tingling in my body, I think it's a placebo because I don't usually get high that fast.
00:35 definitely not placebo anymore, I feel a tingling and pleasure in my body, my skin is very sensitive to everything, typing on my computer I feel that the keys are massaging my fingers, I take advantage of this sensitivity to take a shower while the peak is coming. Feeling the water on my body was awesome.
01:00 I start to feel a great euphoria and I see the colors very vibrant, the sky is spectacular, I feel like sharing with my friends how I feel and I write to them, I am very open to talk to people, here comes my first appreciation of difference with respect to MDMA: I feel my euphoria more controlled, I am not a slave of that euphoria, I feel it more "clean" as if I was more in control. I feel very hot suddenly, my forehead is hot, I pour cold water on my face.
1:30 All the effects are intensified, I am reaching the peak and it is spectacular, lots of positive feelings, introspection, I decide to walk my dog and go for a walk around the neighborhood, before leaving I took half a pill more because I read that it was not good to redose too late.
3:00 the effects are maintained, it is being spectacular, I definitely feel like I have more control than with MDMA, it starts to get dark so I go back home to listen to music until the night comes, I took it too late stuck at bedtime, but nothing happens for being a bad boy one night.
5:00 I'm still feeling the intense effects, not as intense as 2 hours ago but I'm still definitely high, the effect is longer, I start listening to music, I have interesting visuals when I let my eyes stay still, not as intense as LSD of course but as if it was a low dose of it.
7:00 I start to be very tired, it was hard for me to fall asleep, probably because of taking it late obviously and the effect of the 2-FMA. In the end I fell asleep around 3:00 a.m. (my first dose was exactly at 18:00).
The next day I only feel a little tired, the normal thing of going to bed late, I don't feel down at all, I don't feel that the drug is "still" in me, with MDMA if I feel it the next day as if it was lowering my mood, it has been a very cool experience and from now on I prefer it to MDMA in my personal opinion, in a few months I will try it again in a more social environment and see how it goes! But it has exceeded my expectations.
submitted by Karevan098
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2023.05.30 12:33 jinu- help
So, I met this girl Kylea. About 2 years ago. She was dating my co-worker's son. This was back when I used to work at a liquor store. She started working there too and because we were pretty much the only people our age, and because we worked with each other so much, I kind of developed a crush on her. I was 2 months out of a year long relationship. We used to flirt(jokingly) all the time. I never thought too much about it. Then my co-workers(not her boyfriend's mom) started pointing it out that she might have a crush on me too. Apparently, she made it pretty obvious but I'm just dense like that. She started telling me things about her relationship and how her boyfriend was kind of abusive. One Sunday night when it was just us two in the store and it was pretty quiet, she came on to me pretty strong. I was 23 at the time and pretty lonely, going through some of the worst years of life. I had just lost my mom to cancer the year before and had just broken up with my girlfriend because I didn't feel my heart was into the relationship anymore. I wasn't finding joy in anything, other than going to work and getting to spend time with Kylea. She was so much like me, we pretty much became best friends. That Sunday night, we figured we would eventually end up fucking. I knew she was in a relationship, and I wasn't looking for one, so I assumed we were on the same page. Next week, I picked her up, brought her home and we did it. Not to brag or anything, but it was the best sex of her life, and mine. She came about 6 times and took me an hour and half to finish. We were exhausted, and she was so sore she couldn't walk. The ride back to drop her off was weird. She was looking at me differently. She came over again the next day. This time as well, all that passion and sexual tension of months led to great sex. She said she loved me in the middle of it, while looking into my eyes. I said it back. After that night she never left my place. Her boyfriend eventually found out after a week or so(I had asked her to tell him, and end things with him like an adult plenty of times). Around the same time my roommates were fed up with me too because of Kylea staying over all the time. She moved back with her parents, and after getting kicked out of my place, I couch surfed at a friend's for a month and a half, and eventually(after about 5 months) found a place for me and Kylea. She moved in after a month and half. We had both quit our jobs and moved to a new city, looking to start a new life. We were talking about marriage all the time, and having sex, laughing, dancing. I was in love. And I believe so was she. She couldn't find a job and I was on a work permit in a foreign country, which was ending in 4 months. I took care of her and covered her for the next 5 months. We decided we would just get married so I could get residency and keep on working. We wanted to have kids and our own place. I was 24 and we had been dating for over a year, I was sure that this was the woman I was going to marry. I met her family, and she was the first girl I ever introduced to my family. I was her first boyfriend that her family liked. Everything was perfect. Then, this January, she got fired from her job for nothing that was her fault. I'll admit that she did not deserve that. I truly believe that. But before moving forward, let me give you all some context. She was still texting her exes while she was with me, and when I found out and confronted her, she got mad. She started punching me and shoving me, and I managed to keep myself in check. I picked up my basketball and left to go play ball so I could not think about it. It didn't work. Then she came looking for me, crying and apologizing, and I melted. I could not not forgive her. I loved her. She said she wouldn't do it again and I forgot about it. Coming back to January 2023(the whole texting thing happened in August 2022), she got fired and next month happened to be her turn to pay rent. I bought her hair dye, a hair straightener and a new hair dryer because she had always wanted one, and I wanted to see her in better spirits. She dyed her hair the next day. She straightened her hair the day after that. Day after that she met me outside the house, and she was looking gorgeous. She had makeup on, and red straight hair. I was blown away, truly happy and ecstatic. Delighted even, because she seemed to be in a better mood. She said she was going to go to her mom's place for the night. I said okay and kissed her, and told her I loved her. She said she loved me too. She gave me a tight squeeze, and said goodbye. For some reason, that night, her leaving made me really sad. Almost to the point of tears, as if I knew that was the last time I would get to see her. She picked that up too and told me not to cry over her, as she shut the door behind her. Next three days I kept texting her and waiting for her reply. She would send me a single text every night, saying she was going to stay one more night. I trusted her. The fourth day, Friday, I got off work and was looking forward to coming home to her. She wasn't home still. I texted her but didn't get a reply. And then I made a mistake, I texted her mom. I asked her mom if she could get Kylea to reply to my texts, and her mom told me that she wasn't there, nor had she been for a while. I broke, then and there. I texted her the screenshot of her mom's text and told her not to come home. I asked her if she was cheating on me, she said no and that she was with a friend(refused to say who, said "does it even matter") and just needed some space to think things through. We were supposed to get married the next month. After that, she blocked me and wouldn't reply to her mom, or me. After a month of a constant stream of texts, and just general degeneracy, I stopped texting her. Then my manager from the liquor store texts me and tells me that she saw Kylea, with her ex. The one she told me used to hit her. The one she told me was an alcoholic, to the point where he had trouble getting an erection. The dude was a couple of years younger than me. I turned 25 last month, and its been 4 months since she left. I have no answers. I don't know what I did wrong. Maybe it's karma, maybe its just bad luck. I know I'm not the only person this has happened to, but it still hurts so much. I keep thinking about her from time to time. I keep getting Google photos memories of her and me. I can't bring myself to look at the pictures, nor delete them. I even downloaded Tinder again, on the advice of some friends. I've talked to some girls and tried to put myself out there. To find a distraction, to find someone better, or to find someone I deserve, however good or bad I am. Her cheating on me was not my fault, but I can't help but blame myself, for being so naive, and stupid.
Kylea, you'll probably never see this, and honestly I hope you don't. I don't want to give you the satisfaction of thinking that you found something else(while you were with me), and I'm still struggling to come to terms with the fact that its over.
I remember you crying and telling me how much you loved me, and how I didn't realize how much I meant to you, outside that Indian restaurant on 90th Ave and Scott Rd.
I remember you preferred my chicken and alfredo pasta over everything else I'd cook for you.
I remember you telling me, a month before you left me, on Christmas Eve, how happy you were that your mom and dad liked me. That your sisters liked me. And how much that meant to you.
I remember you telling me how you would stick with me through everything, and that you would never cheat on me.
I remember telling you things about my mom I have never told anyone.
I remember your favorite drinks, and favorite spots to chill.
I remember how much you loved Dom(my best friend's kid), and how I had no answer for him when he asked me where you were.
I remember all the things I gave you and all the things you gave me because I had to go through all our stuff and seperate it, so your parents could come pick it up.
I remember everything, and nothing.
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2023.05.30 11:56 gh0stst0ries Don’t Like My Tattoo’s Colors
I really don’t like the way my tattoo is colored >.< I want to post a picture but don’t want my artist to somehow see and get offended. They are super great, I think we just had a different vision for this one. I was going for spooky, pastel goth vibes with a lot of pink. However, the pink used looks very red in the skin (didn’t look like that in the bottle) and my artist also used a mintyish green color next to it that I’m not stoked on either. So rather than pastel goth Halloween vibes, it looks like Christmas lol. It’s a clown outfit so there’s also white (just my skin) polka dots and stripes. I was thinking of maybe just going over the colors I don’t like in black and having the white colored pink, but don’t know how well that would work. There are some black lines to show wrinkles in the fabric and I’m thinking it would look weird to cover them… I don’t know. I had a clear vision in my head and it just didn’t turn out how I wanted at all. I’ll contact my artist of course but I’d love to hear any advice first and see if there’s even anything that can be done.
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2023.05.30 11:36 RoadKing_04 Unexpected Roommate
My wife and I had been travelling around Europe for several weeks now, and currently we were in Spain at a popular tourist location on the coast. We had just arrived at the seaside town in the early afternoon and proceeded to check into the hostel. Frustratingly there had been a mix up, and instead of the private two-person room I thought we had reserved, we were instead booked into a four person room. They had nothing else available and given the popularity of the area we were not going to find anything better on short notice. The staff advised us that only one other guest was booked in and they were yet to arrive so we might be lucky and get the room to ourselves.
I have been married to my wife Emma for almost 8 years. Emma is a 5'2" petite brunette and despite having a petite frame, she has amazing curves, with a fantastic set of D cup breasts. My favorite part of her body however is her ass, closely followed by her hips. She works out a lot, and squats have done her wonders. It's the kind of ass that men can't help but stare at when she walks by in her yoga pants, and watching guys attempt to catch sneaky glances at her is a pleasure of mine.
The weather in Spain was sweltering so we planned to spend the afternoon at the beach. The great thing about Europe is the sexual open mindedness. The beaches are full of topless women and tiny bikinis. Em doesn't tend to wear anything too skimpy, at least not in public, but I had managed to convince her to buy a little white bikini that covered a lot less than what she would normally wear. We found our room, locked our belongings away and changed ready for the beach. Em put on her new bikini and then slipped a red loose fitting summer dress over top. As I pulled up my board shorts, I had to adjust my semi erection to get them on. I don't know what had turned me on more, my gorgeous wife's figure in her revealing bikini, or the idea of her wearing that out public.
We arrived at the beach and eventually found a spot with enough space for us to lay down our towels under partial shade.
"I'm already so hot, I'm going to jump in the water" Em said just after we set up our spot.
"No problem, I'll just wait here" I responded. As she walked down to the sea, I was hypnotized watching her barely covered ass gently bounce from side to side. I could feel the blood rushing into my crotch and had almost got it under control when Em headed back from the water, the wet cloth clinging tightly to her large jiggling tits. I glanced down and noticed the faintest outline of her pussy showing through the thin white material.
Em noticed me poring over her physique, laughed and said "I see you like my new outfit" whilst looking down at my shorts, at which moment I realized that I was so focused on Em that I had forgotten about the tent that was forming in my shorts.
A little embarrassed, I quickly rolled onto my stomach, pushing my erection out of the way. Em came over, leaned down so that her large half exposed tits were directly in front of me and gave me a lingering kiss, clearly trying to make things more awkward for me. I was surprised but excited to see how comfortable she was in this skimpy bikini.
After the beach, we went for a nice walk through a little park area not far from the beach. It was so hot that most people seemed to have gone to the beach, and there weren't many people around. It was a beautiful park, it had a lot of trees and greenery so we decided to attempt to find a nice shaded spot we could sit and relax in out of the sun. We followed a small path through some trees for a while, which opened up into a clearing with a wooden park bench. There was a large tree shading the bench so we sat down and Em grabbed out our kindles.
After 5 mins or so, Em looked over at me and smiled, then went back to reading. She placed her hand on my thigh and gently began rubbing her fingertips back and forward. There was nothing particularly sexual about it, but after watching Em so intently down at the beach I was still a little turned on. I could feel my penis begin to respond and I think Em noticed as her fingers shifted from my thigh and began rubbing gently across my shorts over my cock, often circling the tip before moving back down and up again. I was a little surprised but said nothing and simply enjoyed the attention.
I pretended to just keep reading, but Em suddenly turned to me and said, "Get it out".
I was caught off guard, "Here? "But what if someone comes?"
"We haven't seen any one since we first got here", "Besides, the whole idea is for someone to come" she laughed at her own joke, and I joined in.
Realizing my wife wanted to get me off on a park bench in a public area was extremely hot, and my cock was now rock hard. I could feel my heart racing, I nervously looked around as I slid down my shorts, allowing my cock to spring out.
Em grabbed it and started stroking up and down. I let out a satisfied sigh and slightly relaxed into the bench. I calmed down once I realized that the angle of the bench relative to the path meant that even if someone emerged, they probably would not see my cock waving about in my wife's hand.
Em glanced around, making sure no one could be heard approaching, then leaned down and took my cock in her mouth. She licked slowly around the head before getting to work. She slid her mouth up and down my shaft whilst stroking it with her hand. She stopped occasionally to give the head of my cock particular attention, kissing and licking it while staring up at me with beautiful big eyes.
After about a minute she stopped, looked up at me with her hand gripping the base of my cock and the head resting against her cheek and quietly but assertively stated "I want some fun too, you need to fuck me now".
Despite already having my cock out in public I was yet again surprised and nervously excited about what my wife was wanting to do. She then climbed up, pulled her dress up around her hips and straddled me. She was still wearing her bikini underneath.
"Are you serious?" I asked, obviously hoping she was.
"Hurry up and put your cock inside me" she whispered in my ear.
My cock sat straight up between her legs, and I reached down and slid her bikini to one side. I gently began to massage her pussy and clit and discovered she was soaking wet.
I grabbed my cock and angled it towards her. I rubbed the head of my cock up and down between her lips and she exhaled in excitement and then lowered her hips and slowly slid down the length of my cock to the base. She let out a quiet but drawn out "Ohhh fuuuck" then began rocking her hips back and forward, grinding against me with her tits wobbling in my face.
I was worried someone might accidently happen upon us but I couldn't bring myself to concentrate on anything other than my super sexy wife riding my cock in a public park.
By this stage I was ready to erupt, and it took all my will power not to come immediately. At that moment we both heard people coming up the path towards the clearing.
Em stopped, breathing heavily and said "Shit that's bad timing, I was already about to come".
"Good" was all I responded and reached between her legs.
Realizing what I was about to do Em initially tried to protest "No we should stop", but as soon as I began to rub her clit she quietly moaned "ohhh yes, OK" and began eagerly grinding against me. Within a couple of seconds, she began moaning in my ear "Oh fuck I'm about to come, don't stop".
I massaged her more vigorously and a moment later she began to tremble and came, moaning quietly in my ear. She paused breathing heavily for a moment then regained her composure and quickly slipped off my lap so that she was sitting next to me. I hastily pulled my shorts up and hid my pussy soaked erection as best as I could. Just then an older couple entered the clearing. Em was still in a state of euphoria and I was awkwardly trying to come up with something to say but I blanked and instead Em and I just looked at each other and laughed.
Once we went back to the room we realised we weren't going to enjoy the privacy we had hoped for that evening. Given the earlier events I was rather disappointed that I wouldn't have my wife alone after dinner. The four person room appeared to currently have just one other occupant, although they were not around when we arrived. We sorted our beds and replaced our belongings, preparing to head out for dinner.
I was about to go to the bathroom when Emma turned to face me "If we're lucky our new roommate will stay out late, I was planning to give you a little relief after your excitement earlier", giving me a little squeeze through my shorts.
"Even if they're here, I don't see the problem" I joked, adding "It looks like this stuff belongs to a guy, so maybe you could see if he's interested".
"Stop it" She said as she gave me a playful smack, and a smile that showed a hint of excitement mixed with uncertainty.
Although never seriously intending to actually follow through, we had discussed how much I would love to watch her come in front of me, filled with another man's cock. Emma always seemed hesitant to admit it, but I knew she liked the idea, a lot. I think she was just worried that I would be upset if I saw her with someone else, but in reality the whole idea just really excited me.
That night we decided to go out for a nice casual dinner. Em still had on her cute little summer dress, and I switched out my singlet for a casual collared shirt. We went out for dinner at a local tapas restaurant. It was nothing too fancy but it had really good reviews.
Emma is gorgeous and I sat there amazed at how lucky I was to have such a perfect best friend; not only beautiful, but kind, smart, and funny too. We ordered a bottle of wine and chatted about our holiday and our plans for the next few days. The food was fantastic so we just kept ordering extra tapas. We ordered a second bottle of wine and were both becoming quite tipsy. After a while we talked about going back to our room to pick up where we left off in the park. Em mentioned how frustrating it was that we didn't have the room to ourselves and we discussed just simply going for a nice walk down the beach after the restaurant.
"We could always stop by the room, there may be no one in" I said cheekily.
"I thought we weren't going to worry about our roommate anyway?" Em joked.
"It wouldn't bother me, I just thought you wouldn't be comfortable involving someone else" I quietly replied with a grin.
"Well to be honest I like the idea too, as long as you're sure you would be OK with that? Em said with a surprisingly serious questioning look.
"I'm completely comfortable in our relationship and it wouldn't upset me at all" I quickly responded, trying to hide how excited I was becoming. I could feel my heart racing faster the more this conversation went on.
I couldn't believe it, despite my suspicions she had never actually admitted to sharing my fantasy. I suddenly felt nerves mixed with my excitement until it occurred to me that the likelihood of the right situation actually arising was very low.
Em gave me a seductive smile and said "Well lets go meet our new play friend".
I laughed, I knew she was mostly joking but it felt like progress towards my ultimate fantasy.
We got up to our room and quietly went in. Although it wasn't very late late, you never know what time people might head to bed as they may be getting up early to move on. We found one bed still unclaimed but the mystery roommate had arrived sometime earlier. He was laying on his bed, chilling with his computer when we arrived. He promptly sat up and smiled, looking a bit awkward. He was only wearing boxer briefs and apologized saying that it was so hot and thought he would be in bed before anyone returned. We both laughed and said that we weren't bothered at all.
"Nice to meet you, I'm Thomas" He said.
"Nice to meet you" we both replied.
Thomas was quite tall and lean, with dark hair and a friendly face. He was quite a good looking guy, and I could tell Em wasn't too upset about the appearance of our new roommate, nor that he only had underwear on.
We sat down at the table in the corner, and chatted with Thomas for a while, whom had gotten up and pulled out a chair and joined us. We discussed travel, where we had been and what our immediate plans were. At one stage Em got up to use the bathroom, and I pretended not to notice Thomas's gaze follow her as she walked across the room.
After a little longer we ended up lounging on our beds, eventually I got up "I'm going to jump in the shower, won't be too long".
"OK that'll be nice after such a long and hot day" Em replied.
I grabbed a towel and a fresh pair of underwear and headed to the bathroom. I thought about grabbing some shorts but it was so hot and Thomas was hardly going to complain so I didn't bother. I jumped in the shower then thought about my sexy wife sat in the next room with a barely clothed stranger and my cock was hard almost instantly. I began to visualize Em with Thomas, my ultimate fantasy, and it took all my will power after the days' events not to get myself off in the shower.
When I came back Em was still in conversation with Thomas. When I sat down she turned and said that a shower sounded like a good idea. She rummaged through her bag for a while and then pulled out some fresh clothes.
I noticed she grabbed a skirt to which I quietly said "you don't need to put that on"
"But the only clean panties I have are thongs" holding up a sexy small cream colored pair.
"Yeah but you're just going to take the skirt off when you get back so don't worry. It won't bother anyone in here and anyway you would be over dressed", then I grinned.
She laughed, rolled her eyes, then chucked the skirt back in the bag and headed off to the shower. I felt a burst of excitement picturing my sexy wife with her amazing ass walking back into the room in a tiny thong in front of an equally barely dressed stranger.
Em came back wearing the small sexy thong but to my surprise she also hadn't bothered to put on a bra under her little singlet. Her large tits were very obvious as they jiggled as she crossed the room. I instantly felt my boxers tighten.
I glanced over at Thomas who was pretending to busily look through his pack, but I noticed his eyes were fixated on my wife's ass in her tiny little underwear. He clearly liked what he saw.
Em had a sheepish smile and quietly whispered "I forgot to grab a bra, I hope it's not too obvious".
"It really is, but I don't think anyone in here will mind, besides your ass is distracting enough anyway" I whispered with a smile.
She looked back over at Thomas who smiled and quickly looked back down at his pack. Em had clearly caught his line of sight and looked back at me grinning. She obviously enjoyed the attention and seemed to be a little turned on.
I was slouched across the bed width-wise with my head and shoulders against the wall and my legs off the edge. Em grabbed her book and then came and curled up on her side next to me, using my chest as a pillow.
"Alright my turn" Thomas said, getting up and walking to the bathroom and closing the door behind him.
Em put down her book and began gently rubbing her hand up and down my inner thigh, I was already bulging against my boxers due to a combination of Ems lack of clothing, her excitement at the attention she was getting, and the fact that she seemed to like all of this just as much. She propped herself up on her elbows, looked around at me and slid her hand up my leg and starting rubbing my cock through my underwear.
"You poor man, you really need some release" She whispered.
She then pulled the waistband down just enough for my cock to burst out. She grabbed it and immediately slid her lips over the head. It was almost too much, I couldn't believe how close I was to coming.
Up and down her bead bobbed, and as she was side on I reached out and grabbed a handful of her stunning ass. She clearly meant for me to come as she relentlessly sucked my cock, switching between deep repetitive strokes and gently flicking her tongue across the tip of my dick.
This had only been going a minute or so when I heard the shower stop, panicking I went to pull away worried that Thomas would reappear at any moment, but Em instead reached down and fondled my balls gently whilst doubling the rate she slid her mouth up and down my cock.
I erupted, wave after wave of come shooting into the back of her throat. It took all of my will power not to cry out in pleasure. She didn't stop, just slowed down and swallowed each load that entered her mouth. Content, she stopped and let me quickly pull the waist band back over my still semi-hard penis.
She looked at me and whispered "I'm so fucking horny. You're going to need to fuck me soon".
At that moment, Thomas opened the door and wandered back in. Following suit, he had only bothered to put on a fresh pair of grey boxer briefs. He was still rubbing his hair with his towel as he wandered towards his bed, allowing for an unnoticed look at his package.
I could tell Em had taken advantage of this as her head shifted on my leg, where she had laid back down after finishing me off. I suspect that Thomas may have done that on purpose, allowing my wife to have ample chance to check out what appeared to be a rather large cock.
By all appearances we had not moved and Thomas sat down and picked up his laptop. He then grabbed out his headphones and said he was going to find something to watch.
Em had her book again, still lying on her side, and shifted her ass back towards me. I began to run my hand along the back of her thighs, she had her legs curled up with her knees partway up towards her chest.
Her panties had shifted up her ass and as I caressed the back of her thighs I occasionally ran my fingers across the lips of her pussy, finding that the material was very damp. Her breathing intensified and became shallow as she moved slightly, towards the pressure of my hand.
I gently stroked her from behind, pressing a little harder each time, and she laid there breathing hard, trying not to move too much or make too much noise. I pushed her panties to the side and slid a finger in. She wasn't just damp, she was soaking wet. She began rocking her hips slightly, like she was trying to fuck my finger, and I could tell how much she just wanted rip my cock out and mount me, regardless of who saw.
She put her book down and reached up and started stroking my cock through my boxers, which to my surprise was not far off being fully erect again already.
I stopped momentarily and whispered "Babe what are you doing, Thomas could see that".
"I don't care, I'm so fucking horny" she whispered back. "Besides he doesn't seem to mind".
I glanced over and realized Thomas was watching us over his laptop, he was obviously aware of what I had been doing to Em as his cock was similarly rock hard, clearly visible through his boxers and his hand was gently stroking across the material.
I was surprised by my reaction, I immediately became relaxed, realizing that Thomas must have decided we didn't mind being watched, and he was quite happy for us to see him watching. Thinking about all of our previous discussions, it occurred to me that my fantasy of watching my wife with another man had all of a sudden become a real possibility.
Thomas still had his headphones in so I whispered to Em "Go and give Thomas the treatment I just got, I want to watch from over here".
If she was startled by the idea, she hid it well. She stopped stroking me and turned her head and looked me in the eye.
"Really? Are you sure?"
"If you want to do it then I would love to see that" I replied.
"It sounds kind of fun right now" she smiled. "But that's all I'm going to do".
"OK then" I said as I slid my finger out of her soaking wet pussy and gave her a wee spank on the ass, indicating to get going.
She got up looked over at Thomas and took a couple of steps across to his bed, glancing briefly back at me and stopping just in front of him. As she moved towards him he placed his laptop on the bed beside him and shifted slightly. Looking very excited but also confused about why this fantastically sexy, incredibly horny married woman stood in front of him while her husband sat a few feet behind.
"Er, what's going on?" he mumbled.
"My husband thinks it's unfair you're missing out" Em said. "You should move here to the edge of the bed".
He seemed slightly unsure but shuffled forward and sat on the edge of the bed, placing his feet on the ground. His cock bulging against his boxers. Em crouched down onto her knees and reached up grabbing the waist band of his underwear before sliding them all the way down and off. His cock burst out when the resistance of the material was suddenly removed. Em was briefly still and although I was looking at the back of her head, I knew she was taking a moment to admire what she was looking at.
His cock was big, probably an inch or 2 longer than mine and it also had a lot of girth. Where my cock would be considered a decent size, Thomas's was big, and the idea of my wife sucking on a big fat cock right in front of me was overwhelmingly hot.
Em plunged downwards and her head slowly began moving up and down. Thomas leaned back on his elbows, looked upwards and groaned as my wife's tongue massaged the tip of his big cock. Then she slid her lips further and further down his shaft as she bobbed up and down. I got up, slid off my own boxer briefs and moved to a far end of the bed to get more of a side on view. I didn't see the point in keeping my cock hidden away, not that it was hidden.
I couldn't believe how hard it was or how horny I was given that I had been drained only 10 or 15 mins earlier. I began slowly stroking my own shaft watching my wife's display. Em kept at it, on her knees with one arm resting on the bed next to Thomas, the other hand sliding up and down his shaft in time with the motion of her glistening lips stroking gently up and down his cock. There was an occasional muffled moan of enjoyment from Em as she relentlessly worked her tongue back and forth, pausing sometimes to lick the underside of the shaft or gently suck on his balls. She was not moving quickly like she had done with me, clearly wanting to draw this out for as long as Thomas could last.
I sat there, soaking it in whilst stroking my own cock. Ems ass and hips swayed back and forward slightly as she moved up and down with the length of his shaft in her mouth. I looked at her pussy, the outline of which was visible from behind as she was bent over in doggy position. She was still wearing her cream panties, which were now clearly soaked through.
I stood up, moved behind Em and knelt directly behind her. The carpet was soft under my knees and I gave her ass a gentle spank then reached forward and gently grabbed hold of the waist of her panties on each side of her hips. Her only response was to slightly lift her knees up indicating she was happy for me to take them off.
I peeled them down, watching them stick slightly to her wet pussy and felt my throbbing cock twitch with excitement when I saw how soppy, wet, and swollen her pussy was. I had never seen it look so ready to be fucked. I pressed up against her ass and rubbed my cock back and forward against her lips, her juice spreading along my length as I repeatedly brushed against her clit. She trembled slightly and kept slowly stroking Thomas's cock.
I grabbed hold of her hips, slid back along her and then plunged in, all the way to the end. Every inch of my cock pressed firmly inside her soaking wet pussy. She cried out in pleasure and briefly forgot about the big cock resting against her lips as I began slowly but firmly thrusting in and out of her from behind, my balls lightly slapping against the back of her thighs with each stroke as I filled her again and again.
She moaned every time my cock was buried to its depth and began sucking Thomas's cock again, this time with increasing speed and intensity. I continued slowly impaling her whilst listening to her moans, muffled by the large cock filling her mouth.
Thomas suddenly tensed, grabbed Ems head and groaned, hips jerking slightly as he erupted, squirting load after load into my wife's mouth. The moment Thomas had finished, Em trembled and gasped "I'm coming, FUCK I'm COMMMMIIING!" as she grasped his thighs and climaxed with her face in his lap.
I continued burying the length of my cock inside her, briefly pausing each at the end of each thrust. Em stopped trembling and I began to slow, however she started to push back on each thrust, attempting to pick up the pace. I was so close to coming, the pleasure of watching my wife come and quiver whilst sucking down the come of another man was incredible, but I wanted to keep pleasuring her as long as I could.
However, Em had become more horny than I had ever imagined. She started pushing her sexy ass back into me more aggressively, and seemed determined to speed up the rhythm.
"Don't stop, fuck me harder" she moaned and I could not help myself so I began to comply.
I glanced up and noticed that Thomas was rock hard again already and had begun rubbing his own cock as he watched. He occasionally slapped his huge dick gently against Ems face, and she seemed to be loving having a cock at each end for her enjoyment. Never would I have believed my usually quite reserved wife could be such a horny, cock hungry little slut. I can't explain how amazing it was to watch.
"Faster, fuck me faster, I'm going to come again already!" Em groaned.
I couldn't believe how turned on she was despite having just come hard on my dick. She began to tremble again and I knew she was about to orgasm. At that moment I knew what I was going to do, I wasn't certain how my next course of action would play out but I had a feeling Em wouldn't mind.
I proceeded to slow right down and withdrew my soaking, throbbing cock. She looked back at me over her shoulder, clearly frustrated "What are you doing? I was about to come!"
I smiled, "I know but I want you to suck my cock a bit first" I said as I turned and sat back on the bed behind me.
She pouted, but turned and crawled back towards me, grasped my cock and began to seductively slide her tongue around the tip. She immediately seemed to forget her frustration and vigorously began to pleasure me. Thomas was getting an eyeful of my insanely horny bent over wife and had picked up the pace stroking himself.
I looked down at my beautiful wife and whispered "Maybe Thomas could have a turn now?" She paused slightly for a moment with my cock still in her mouth, smiled slightly and excitedly nodded before continuing to blow me.
I looked up at Thomas, we made eye contact and I gestured with a nod down at my wife's sexy ass swaying invitingly in front of him. He raised his eyebrows questioningly, pointed to his big hard cock and then towards my wife's swollen pussy. I couldn't believe this was about to happen, I smiled and nodded as calmly as I could.
He got up, moved behind Em and knelt down. He cautiously placed his hands on her ass and stroked down her thighs to which she responded with an obvious moan of pleasure at the touch. This seemed to spur Thomas on, he slid his hand between her legs and based on the pleasurable groans from Em, immediately began to rub her pussy.
He maneuvered right up to Em's ass and slid his cock between her legs, and began to rub back and forth along her clit. She gasped slightly and turned briefly to look at Thomas behind her, who was ready to take her doggy-style. She then looked back up at me, excited but unsure, clearly worried about how I felt about this. I had an excited smile on my face and she relaxed.
"Are you sure?" she mouthed silently, doing her best not to moan as Thomas rubbed his fat cock up and down against her swollen clit.
"Fuck yes" I half whispered, loud enough that Thomas knew he was good to go.
Em had already begun moving in response to his cock, grinding her clit along his shaft and was clearly enjoying it.
Thomas took that as his cue, grabbing Ems hip with one hand and with the other he slowly guided his big fat cock towards the sopping wet pussy of my wife. He gently rubbed the bulbous purple head around the her swollen, soaking red lips, lathering his cock in her juice. He pushed forwards slowly to begin with, slightly stretching her open as he slid all 8 or 9 inches inside her.
Her pussy was so wet that Thomas was able to ram his entire meaty cock into her tight stretched pussy in one smooth movement until he had impaled her, with his pelvis nuzzled into her ass.
I couldn't believe her tight little pussy had swallowed his entire big throbbing cock in one go. Ems mouth fell open and she let out a noise somewhere between a moan and a grunt, immense pleasure visible on her face.
"Fuck that feels good, oh my god" she mumbled, so distracted by pleasure that she seemed unable to properly speak.
Thomas then began slowly stroking his cock back and forward, while my wife moaned louder and louder. She began to try and suck my cock again, which was already seeping pre-come just in my excitement from what I was witnessing, but she was too distracted. Her head was bobbing and lolling around in my lap as she moaned more than I had ever heard. She seemed to lose control, overwhelmed with bliss.
All of a sudden she convulsed, her finger nails digging into my thighs. "Oh my god, fuck, I'm coming already, I'm coming so hard!" she cried out. "Fuck that's so good".
She heaved with each wave of pleasure, but Thomas just kept pumping away, picking up the pace instead of slowing, with the sound of his balls slapping against my wife's thighs getting faster and louder. Em had finished her orgasm but seemed as horny as ever and began panting as Thomas relentlessly impaled my wife over and over with his big cock.
My own cock waved and bumped against my gasping and groaning wife's face, completely forgotten as she neared climax yet again. I was so turned on that the pre-come was leaking from the tip with nothing but the slight contact against Ems cheek as she was being pounded. Luckily Em was too preoccupied to even notice it since I would have exploded instantly if she had grabbed it.
In between moans of ecstasy Em cried "Oh my god your huge cock feels SO GOOD". Thomas continued to impale my wife, burying his big fat cock over and over in my wife's tight little pussy like a machine.
"Don't stop...oohhh...I want your massive cock...ohhhh... to fill me with come! Oohhh yes...oh yes!"
At the moment she said come, Thomas grunted with exertion.
"Fuck yeah, I'm filling your pussy" he groaned, with every thrust of his big cock pumping come deep inside my wife.
"Yes, yes, YES...fill me with your MASSIVE COCK!" Em moaned as she came and convulsed like I had never seen before, quivering with each wave of pleasure.
It was simply too much, I grabbed my dick, stroked only a couple times and exploded, squirting come all over my wife's beautiful face.
Em collapsed next to me and Thomas fell backwards on his bed; those two panting with exertion, and me breathing heavily. My testicles ached, having never been emptied so much in such a short period of time.
My beautiful wife was covered in come, mine was dripping off her face and Thomas's leaking out of her red swollen pussy, but she was too satisfied to care.
She shook slightly and lay there still breathing heavily, satisfied beyond anything she had experienced before.
She picked up my underwear, wiped the come from her face then curled up naked against me in our bed. I cuddled her tightly, and despite my wife's pussy being filled with another mans come, I had never felt more intimately connected with her.
Em briefly went to the bathroom to clean up then returned and curled up against me, we were both exhausted and fell asleep moments later.
The next morning Thomas had already left before we awoke. It must have been a combination of him sneaking out and all the wine the previous night that we hadn't noticed him leave. We laid in bed for a while with Em as the little spoon.
"Well last night was fun" Em said sheepishly.
I laughed "Yeah sure was, I'm glad you had a good time".
I was running my hand across Em's hip and thigh while we laid there. I knew she was thinking about last night and could no doubt feel my erection pressed against her bum.
I slid my hand between her legs and found her very wet. I rolled her onto her back and moved down to her pussy and gave it a kiss.
"Maybe we should book four person rooms for all our holidays from now on" I said.
Em just nodded eagerly and laid back thinking about the night before as my tongue began to massage her swollen clit.
copied from Literotica
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2023.05.30 11:35 Princelycharmer Apex was a really bad movie.
Apex was a bad movie. It was pure horrible shlock. And the storyline was completely out of sync with the supposed premise of the movie; a single guy with no weapons pitted against wealthy but heartless hunters, that were armed to the teeth, who despite that takes them all out. It was supposed to be about Bruce Willis being the invincible prey who gets the bad guys, but it turned out to be a movie where the hunters engaged in personal vendettas and score settling, and ended up ignoring the prey, thereby overthrowing the whole basis of the movie.
Bruce Willis just walked around a forest for about 90 minutes by himself, and the hunters ended up taking each other out. Bruce was never actually a threat to any of the hunters until the very end. Even then, how too easy, and impropable, was it to take out the last guy, Rainsford (played by Neal McDonough), the supposedly apex hunter, who already had him at his mercy.
And the acting was bad. It was wooden, it was flat from all the cast members, except maybe McDonough, who was a little bit scary, and the only cast member who appeared to carry some threat throughout the movie. Even then, he was eventually taken out in the most farcical manner. None of the hunters looked like they were psychopathic hunters, conveying no threat at all. They were supposed to be some dark hearted rich folks out of touch with reality, and who killed for fun, but instead they looked like a bunch of guys (and girl) that boy scouts would be ashamed of. They were a joke as hunters.
Watching this movie was the worst 94 minutes that I have spent in my life. Don't bother watching. You will thank me.
As a postcript, I understand that Bruce Willis was later diagnosed with primary progressive aphasia, a type of frontotemporal dementia. He was likely already suffering from the disease and that most probably contributed to his muted performance in the movie. So he gets a pass from me, as I have always loved his work, even the ones that were panned, like Hudson Hawk, Color of Night, and Death Becomes Her. He could never do wrong in my eyes, but his last few movies have been awful to watch. For instance, Fortress was just stupefyingly unwatchable. The sequel was even worse. But that is another story.
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2023.05.30 11:33 sarra-sagesse People who actually make decent money from a "side hustle", what do you do?
There are about 1,000,001 different side hustles you can start to make some extra money on the side. But only a few of them are worth it…
Side Hustle #1: Real Estate Wholesaling
Real estate wholesaling is one of the best ways to make money in the real estate game when you don’t have capital or a line of credit that would allow you to invest in a home.
The concept is simple. You find people who NEED to sell their homes (divorcees, people with inherited property, or money problems), get the home under contract, and then sell that contract to a cash buyer who can close on the home in 30 days.
For example, if you find a home that’s valued at $200,000 with a motivated seller who is willing to part with the property for only $140,000. You can get the home under contract for $140,000 and then sell it to your investor for $150,000 keeping the $10,000 as an assignment fee.
You don’t need a license to get started, but I highly recommend investing in a training program from Clever Investor or Flip2Freedom since you can quickly get into legal trouble if you aren’t careful about how you set up the contracts.
You’ll need a little bit of money to throw at bandit signs, advertising, and other marketing but it’s a pretty low cost way to make a TON of money very quickly. A friend of mine who’s only 21 years old built his wholesaling company from $0 to more than $100,000/month in PROFIT in about 2 years.
The potential is definitely there, but you need to know what you’re doing so you don’t get into any legal trouble or screw yourself financially.
Side Hustle #2: e-Commerce
While this side hustle isn’t as easy as it once was (because of the massive amount of competition today), it’s still a viable way to make plenty of extra cash without having to work long hours.
You can either create your own product or drop ship products from Ali express and all you need to get started is basic knowledge of Facebook ads, an ecom website (through Shopify), and some general knowledge of the business model.
Although you can earn money immediately, you should probably expect this side hustle to take 30–60 days and at least $1,000 of advertising before you really get into a groove.
I’d recommend checking out Alex Becker’s content on the topic if this is the side hustle you want to use.
Side Hustle #3: Affiliate Marketing
If you’re willing to be patient, affiliate marketing can be a HUGELY profitable side hustle that will generate passive income for years to come.
To get started, you’ll need to make amazing content in a specific niche, and partner with relevant affiliates who will pay you a small commission to promote their products.
It will take you about 6 months of consistent content creation before you see any real results, but once you get the ball rolling, you can easily earn hundreds of thousands of dollars a year without creating a product.
You’ll need a website, YouTube channel, and some other social media sites to ensure that you can build a large enough user base, but once you have an audience that likes and trusts you, it’s pretty easy to recommend high quality products and get paid big commissions for the sales you generate.
Side Hustle #4: Create Info Products
An extension of affiliate marketing, an info product side hustle is simply where you build an audience that knows, likes, and trusts you and you then create information based products sharing your expertise to help your audience with their biggest challenges.
Years ago, I created a product called the Awakening, an in depth program helping men overcome their limiting beliefs, design their dream lives, and take action towards their biggest dreams.
I sold it for $997 and made multiple 6-figures from that product alone.
In order to do this effectively, you’ll need a blog, email list of 10,000+ people, a decent social following, and REAL expertise in a relevant topic.
A great example of this business model is I Will Teach You To Be Rich by Ramit Sethi.
His business earns multiple 7 figures a year (maybe 8 at this point) and all he does is curate the BEST content on finance, peak performance psychology, and online business and then package and sell that information in the form of online products.
He makes a KILLING off of his website and thousands of others have replicated his success. If you have the patience to stick with this model it’s easily the most lucrative side hustle you can create and will help you build real freedom in your life.
Side Hustle #5: Kindle Self Publishing
Self publishing on Kindle is an absolute gold mine of a side hustle.
As long as you’re a halfway decent writer with some expertise in a given niche, you can quickly and (relatively) easily earn $1,000+/month on autopilot by publishing and marketing ebooks on Amazon.
I’ve written 3 books (with another on the way) and they consistently generate more than 6-figures of revenue each year without so much as a minute of my time.
You can write a short 50 page ebook, hire a designer on Fiverr to create an epic book cover, and then learn about content marketing strategies to promote your book and, within only 1–2 months, you’ll have a profitable side hustle getting paid to write about your passions.
Hope this helps
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2023.05.30 11:24 DadThrowawayADHD From a father of an eight-year-old boy with ADHD...
Hi there! As a non-ADHD person myself, but the father of a wonderful little eight-year-old boy (the best thing to ever happen in my life) with ADHD, I thought I’d consult with you guys, the ADHD community, about this. My son – let’s call him Lenny – attends a fantastic school that’s PRETTY understanding about his situation, but they certainly don’t have a FULL understanding about everything, and so, the school’s director – let’s call him Marlon (who is fantastic, and has a great sense of humor, which I mention so that you don’t think my joke below about him is out of place) – suggested that I should record a video that he can distribute to all of the teachers. Below, I’m pasting everything that I’m planning to say in the video.
The wording may occasionally seem a bit odd, but that’s because I’ve tried to write it the way I’m planning to actually SAY it, rather than how I’d normally READ it to myself. Anyway, would you guys mind having a glance and letting me know your thoughts? I know this is extremely long, so if it’s too much, I completely understand, but if you can spare the time, I’d REALLY appreciate it, and thanks in advance!!!
Here’s what I’m planning to say:
Greetings, Everyone. Mike Michaels here, father of Lenny Michaels. First, please excuse me when you see my eyes reading everything I’m saying here. There are a lot of details and nuance to it all, so I wanted to be prepared, rather than just ‘winging it.’ Second, I really want to thank all of you for being so patient with Lenny. I know that most schools are not, and for this, we’re truly grateful to you. Third, and most pertinent to Lenny’s behavior, there’s something that’s important to stress, and I’ve only really begun to fully understand this over the last couple of months: Lenny has a DISABILITY. ADHD is a disability; it’s an almost invisible disability. Yes, it’s also accurately classified as a “disorder,” but most people who don’t have a career in psychology, like me, tend to think of disorders as not being as debilitating as disabilities can be. But make no mistake, ADHD is ALSO a disability; it’s recognized in the Americans with Disabilities Act, and by the Social Security Administration, and much more importantly, by psychological experts that have studied ADHD at length.
Unfortunately, people with untreated ADHD have lifelong struggles, and actually shorter average lifespans. This may all go against layperson thinking – I certainly didn’t used to think of it as a disability myself until I saw it so closely and frequently, but now I have no doubt now that it absolutely is a disability. I’ll get into this next part a bit later, but it’s widely recognized in the psychological community that even the term ADHD, for a variety of reasons, is clinically the wrong term for this condition.
I’ve heard, as I’m sure some of you have too, some parents saying, “oh my kid can’t pay attention sometimes,” or “my kid can’t remember things all the time,” or “my kid acts impulsively often enough.” But when your kid does all of these things, every single day, multiple times every single day, to the point that relationships – and sometimes property – are destroyed, then your kid has a disability, and that disability is called, wrongly, ADHD. Needless to say, it would benefit all of us watching this video, to start reframing this in our minds as a disability that Lenny has – and it would also benefit Lenny, and the other kids that his behavior affects, if all of us here modify our thinking about ADHD, without explicitly telling the other kids that he has a disability.
Now, Lenny also has a second issue known as Sensory Processing Disorder, which I’ll also get into later, since it complicates things. But what I really want to focus on in this video is five different points, all of which I’ll elaborate on a little later: First, like I said, it’s important for adults – but not children, not his peers – but for adults to, as discretely as possible, treat ADHD like an actual disability.
Second, and again, as someone who does not have ADHD myself, I’ve only come around to this understanding more recently, it’s important to not make Lenny feel inferior for not being able to remember important things at certain moments – he simply can’t do it; it’s a symptom of his disability.
Third, helping him with reminders isn’t the be-all, end-all solution to these problems, but it helps, and there are specific ways that reminders can work for ADHD kids, which I’ll get into.
Fourth, I would really appreciate it if everyone could extend their already VERY generous patience just a little bit further anytime we’re tapering Lenny onto or off of new medication. This can cause relapses that he simply has no control over, and for him to feel punished – even if that’s not my intention or your intention – over something that’s chemically changed him, that he didn’t even sign up for, just seems cruel.
And my fifth point, which I’m grateful to Marlon for discussing with me, is that if we can help him better empathize about certain things, then maybe certain impulses will just start to dissipate naturally. And if he doesn’t have these certain impulses, then it becomes a non-issue to try to control something that no longer exists, but that’s a tough one, that I’ll get into later.
(1) For now, let me get into that first point a bit deeper: That it’s important for us adults – but not children, not his peers – to, as discretely as possible, treat ADHD like an actual disability. As I said, the term ADHD is just an incorrect term for this disability. I’ve learned that “attention deficit” and “hyperactivity” are really just symptoms, and not even the only or most significant symptoms for some people that have it. Some other symptoms, which can be equally debilitating, problematic, and even dangerous to an ADHD person’s well-being, include time blindness, as well as a regular and frequent inability – not unwillingness, but inability – to stop acting on impulses, as well as an inability to apply memorized information at the moment it’s needed: The recall. There are other important symptoms, too, but these are the ones I’m going to focus on here.
In psychology, I’ve learned that all of these things are components of the brain’s “executive function,” and in ADHD people, the part of the brain that manages these executive functions is underdeveloped, somewhat comparable – but not entirely analogous – to how someone with muscular dystrophy has underdeveloped muscles.
As an aside, if you’re curious, the medical industry continues to maintain the term ‘ADHD’ because changing it would require a massive, and seemingly impossible, overhaul to the medical billing system that has decades worth of the term ADHD in every medical journal and billing code. Giving it the more accurate term of “Executive Function Disorder” or EFD, just isn’t practical.
But anyway, I know I also mentioned that Lenny has something called Sensory Processing Disorder. This disorder is observed often enough in children with ADHD, which Lenny has been diagnosed with. And Sensory Processing Disorder has also been observed in children with Autism, which has been ruled out in Lenny. And then, Sensory Processing disorder has also been observed in children without either of these things. And it has different manifestations. But in Lenny, his Sensory Processing Disorder causes him to feel a need for pressure in his joints and against his body. This is why you may see him pressing against things more often than others, or pulling things more often than others, or knocking things down. He has a compulsion towards feeling those things in his joints, in his body.
He also has a compulsion related to his auditory sense, where his brain needs to hear loud, explosive things, and so this is why you may see him press other kids that have big reactions, and stay away from kids that don’t. And where someone without ADHD may be able to pause, and recognize that acting on these compulsions would be inappropriate at times, Lenny’s ADHD generally prevents him from doing so.
Anyway, I just wanted to mention that to offer some additional perspective on some of his actions. But getting back fully to just the ADHD component, which is Lenny’s main affliction, the point here is that it’s more than just “not trying hard enough.” It’s that his brain is physically different, and this just isn’t possible without certain interventions.
You wouldn’t press a wheelchair-bound kid to “just get up the stairs,” would you? Well, maybe Marlon would, because he’s got a penchant for the cruel and usual. JUST KIDDING, MARLON! But no, of course you wouldn’t ask a wheelchair-bound kid to do that, without some kind of intervention, like a ramp or an elevator. And in that same way, it shouldn’t be asked of an ADHD-ridden kid to “just remember,” without some kind of intervention, as well, or they’re going to feel like garbage, too. Of course, these things aren’t identical, but they’re similar enough to illustrate the point that interventions are necessary, and that pressing a kid to do something that they can’t is damaging.
And yes, for ADHD kids, non-chemical interventions and reminders are important, and can assist. But the dramatic majority of ADHD patients cannot effectively modify their behavior without medication. Study after study shows that, for these people, it just isn’t possible. Now, different medications do different things to different people. Not every medication works for every ADHD person. For Lenny, we’ve seen that a drug called “Guanfacine” helps significantly, and here’s why: For non-ADHD people, we have impulsive thoughts, too, but a certain part of our brain is developed enough to pause that thought before our body acts on it. That part of Lenny’s brain is not.
Unmedicated, Lenny’s brain lacks the ability to insert this pause between impulsive thought and the action that follows. But, because Guanfacine was originally developed as a medication to lower or slow blood pressure, it also slows other functions, too. And so, the Guanfacine often helps slow Lenny’s impulsive thought to a brief pause, so that he has a moment to consider it before acting on it, and often, as a result, he won’t act on it when he's on Guanfacine. Here’s just one small, easy-to-recognize example – which doesn’t actually involve any relationship issues – to illustrate my point:
Off Guanfacine (or when it’s starting to wear off), when Lenny is finished in the bathroom, his first instinct is to immediately run out of the bathroom and continue whatever he was doing before, without flushing or washing his hands, so he never does, even if I remind him right before he goes into the bathroom. But on Guanfacine, I rarely need to remind him at all – his mind has a brief pause before he leaves, and he’ll usually flush and wash hands. So then, when it comes to slightly more complicated situations in remembering what several kids have told him not to do to them, most of you have seen how that goes: Off Guanfacine (or when it’s starting to wear off), usually not well, but on Guanfacine, often (but not always) better.
And again, I’ve heard plenty of people say, “oh, this type of thing is normal in kids.” But also again, the kind of impulsivity that happens every single day, multiple times every single day, to the point that relationships – and sometimes property – are destroyed, is not normal in kids. And I’d venture to say that any and every kid that does this every single day, multiple times every single day, to the point that relationships – and sometimes property – are destroyed, has this disability known as ADHD, or perhaps some other type of brain impairment that I’m not as well versed in.
On the other hand, with regard to medication, certain meds can sometimes make the symptoms worse in certain people, in certain situations. For example, we also tried Ritalin for Lenny, on two different occasions, at different dosage levels, months apart, each for one week, and both times, his symptoms got worse. You see, Ritalin is a stimulant, and can often, but not always, help ADHD people really focus on something that’s put in front of them. If Lenny were attending a traditional school, where he was expected to sit at a desk for a large portion of the day, and stay focused on one subject for an extended period of time, perhaps Ritalin would help him with this focus. But at his actual school, which we all know is different, this laser focus isn’t expected, and so instead, the Ritalin probably sped up his motor, and reduced that pause time between impulse and action, and more problems occurred.
At some point, we’re going to try other medications, too, like Adderall, and may even others. But Adderall is also a stimulant, with a different chemical make-up. So, because it’s different, it may help in other ways, but because it’s a stimulant, it may also exacerbate the problems like Ritalin did. We won’t know until we try it. And when Ritalin caused Lenny to create more problems, and Lenny got into more trouble, I felt terrible about it, first, because other kids felt his wrath, but also because he was quote, “getting in trouble more,” and not even understanding the reasons why, because these concepts and chemical effects are difficult for children that young to fully understand.
(2) And that brings me to my second main point: It’s important to not make Lenny feel inferior for not being able to remember important things at certain moments – he simply can’t do it. I’ve always sort of known this, and sort of understood it, but as someone without ADHD myself, I only came to this full understanding recently, when I saw something happen...
A couple of weeks ago, he did something somewhat trivial in the grand scheme – I won’t get into details, but it wasn’t something that provided him with some grand material or emotional reward. It was a small, but irritating thing. I took him aside, and I spent five minutes with him, calmly trying to understand why he did it, and explaining to him why he can’t do it in the future. Then, I left for about two minutes, and when I returned, he had already done it again! And I asked him, “Why did you do that? I just got finished explaining why you can’t. Did you already forget?” And he said, “I didn’t forget; I just wasn’t thinking about it when it happened.” And I replied, “but I told you about it TWO MINUTES before it happened. How were you ALREADY not thinking about it?” And then he cried, maybe because I had upset him with my tone, but I think it was more because he felt inferior for not being able to recall this important information when he needed it, and because I unintentionally rubbed this in his face.
And this was my lightbulb moment. Already, he sometimes says to me, “Daddy, why can’t I do these things like other kids can,” and of course, I try to explain and comfort him, but it wasn’t until this specific incident, that I just mentioned, that I connected these things – his disability impairs his recall, and then this causes him to do actions that he doesn’t really want to do, and then he feels shitty about. So, rather than unintentionally rubbing it in his face like I used to, even gently, now, I try to not harp on the fact that he can’t recall these things when he needs to, and I instead try to work with him, constructively, on reminders that he thinks will help him recall pertinent information when he needs to. I hope that all of you will truly take this to heart, and please try the same.
I think this is also important when other kids grill him for not remembering, too. Of course, that’s how they feel, and they should be able to say it – they’ve probably said the same thing to Lenny dozens of times, and their frustration is entirely justified, and should be expressed. But from where I’m standing, instead of teachers jumping on that same wagon, and grilling Lenny just the same way about remembering things, even gently – as I used to – Lenny has expressed to me that it would help for teachers to assist him in expressing back to the other kids that he has this “thing” in his brain (he’s embarrassed to call it ADHD in front of other people) that makes it hard to remember things that he needs to, even if he's been told these things hundreds of times, and maybe they – Lenny and the other kid that he’s meeting with – can then work together to identify some useful in-the-moment reminders that can help him have this in-the-moment recall, right when things start, before they start to escalate.
(3) And with that, let’s get into some of these reminder ideas, which is the third point that I mentioned at the beginning of this video. For adults with ADHD, they have smart phones, with reminders that ping up all the time to remind them of things that non-ADHD people, like me, can remember without, shall we say, “technological assistance.” Or, adults will also put up sticky notes at the locations where these reminders are needed. Even kids at traditional schools can use post-its at their desks. But for Lenny, this doesn’t apply. So maybe, if we can identify areas of the yard where certain problems happen consistently, and other areas of the yard, where different problems happen consistently, maybe we can put up a little sign, or a sticker, or a poop emoji picture that will catch his eye, and serve as a reminder. In fact, this leads me to another revelation I recently had about these reminders…
I used to think that, when teachers are around, Lenny respects limits more because he fears the consequences if he doesn’t – he figures, I used to think, that the teachers will see Lenny creating a problem, and they’ll get upset, so he’s more on guard when they’re watching. However, in light of the recent incident that I mentioned above (and many others like it), I’m starting to rethink this. While that still may be true, I think this is more likely: Lack of teachers’ eyes on him doesn’t cause him to actively think, “Oh, now’s my chance to do what I’m not supposed to!” Rather, lack of teachers’ eyes on him give him no reminder to recall that he’s not supposed to do it. When he notices teachers watching, he doesn’t restrain himself because he fears consequences, he restrains himself because noticing the teachers’ eyes remind him to.
I don’t know, maybe big googly eyes stuck to a nearby fence would serve as a similar reminder when teachers’ eyes aren’t there? Either way, Lenny asked me to table this for the time being. He’s embarrassed to have to be the only kid with visual reminders around the yard, but I made it clear to him that if these things continue, we’re going to have to try the reminders, and that we’ll try them in a way that doesn’t single him out, but rather, applies to “the school” rather than just “to him.” So, I would just ask the teachers – if these reminders become necessary, which I think they probably will – to please discuss with Lenny beforehand, and implement in a way that he’s comfortable with and not embarrassed by.
(4) Now, I touched upon this fourth point earlier, but I wanted to address it in more detail here: And that’s the point about tapering Lenny onto and off of different medications that we may try. Of course, the other kids won’t know when this is happening, but I’ve asked Marlon to at least please let all of the teachers know when it is, so that, hopefully, all of you can please extend your already generous patience a bit further anytime this is happening. As many of you know, problems were heightened a handful of weeks ago. What you may not have known, or had full color on, is that these heightened problems coincided exactly with tapering Lenny onto Ritalin, and then back off of it again, one week later, when it didn’t work. This led to some problematic habits, and even when Lenny had fully tapered off of Ritalin, it still took a few more days to fully break these habits and get back to his pre-Ritalin, on-Guanfacine self.
But during this “period of Ritalin,” there were more problems, and the school’s tolerance got very low, and Lenny felt very punished for actions that were, unknown-to-him, caused by chemical reactions that we – more or less – forced on him, against his will, with pills. And for that, I feel terrible; yes, the recipient children were also treated unfairly, of course, but I also think this was unfair to Lenny, for him to feel “less than” for a root cause (i.e. Ritalin) that was implemented by us. To continue to try to improve his experience, and the other children’s experiences, and the teachers’ experiences, we’re going to try to work with Lenny’s psychiatrist to experiment with new medications and dosages, but it’s likely that some of them won’t work at all, and that others might make things worse, just like the Ritalin did. And so, in the future, when this happens, now that you have this understanding, I really hope that you’ll please expand your already-vast tolerance just a little bit further, knowing that, in those situations, it really is the meds, and not the kid.
(5) And finally, there’s this fifth point I mentioned at the beginning – this point that Marlon had brought up with me: That it would benefit us all to help him empathize, so that perhaps some of the impulses dissipate, and then the reminders of those situations aren’t necessary. Well, guess what – empathy is also a component of executive function, and Lenny has EFD, Executive Function Disorder, better and inaccurately known as ADHD. So, even though I love the idea, I’m just not sure it’s going to be likely, or even possible, that this will work. But as long as we approach it gently, careful to not make him feel less than if he can’t do it, I certainly see no harm in trying. All of you are better trained than I am in helping children empathize with others, so I’ll follow your lead on this.
And really, that’s about it for now. Again, I really want to thank all of you SO MUCH for being SO PATIENT in ways that most other people just aren’t. The fact that you’ve even watched this entire video, with my ugly mug rambling, lets me know that you care about Lenny more than almost anyone else does. I think that if we can all remember to gently and discretely treat his ADHD as a disability, and not make him feel inferior for its symptoms – especially memory, and help him with discrete reminders, and be a bit more patient when we’re trying new meds, and help him with empathy – even though that might not work – if we try all of these things, life will be easier, and just more fun, for everyone, including all of the kids. So, thank you again, and if you want to ask me any questions, or discuss any of this with me, please feel free to call me anytime. My phone number is 555-555-5555. Thanks again!
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