Oh my. This is my first Reddit post ever! Sorry this is pretty lengthy, trying to be thorough! I got so much help from reading through this sub that I felt compelled to share. I got tickets to see LCD Soundsystem over Memorial Day. It was my first visit to Red Rocks. I was very excited but pretty nervous. I adore live music but am also a highly anxious person. Unknown situations can really overwhelm me. I need to feel prepared when I visit new places. I am a fat person and a flatlander who is out of shape so I was extremely worried about how hard it would be to navigate the venue. I did many deep dives on this sub and others and am happy to report I had the perfect visit. Just wanted to share some info for those nervous Nellies like me.
My sister and I stayed at a Holiday Inn in Lakewood. This is far from the Denver Airport but a 15 minute drive to Red Rocks. It is a suburb - there were plenty of chain restaurants, coffee shops, and a Trader Joe's. While not overly exciting or interesting, it was very convenient and met our needs. Also! I highly recommended A Taste of Denmark, an absolutely devine Danish bakery.
We rented a car via Turo and decided to park at the venue. We went at 5 pm (doors at 6 show at 7)and parked in the Upper South Lot. Parking was easy and quick, the staff were friendly and helpful. There was a line of 50-100 people waiting by the fence for when the doors opened. We scoped things out around the parking lot. People had little screen tents, bean bag boards, and camp chairs set up. Since we weren't local/flew in we didn't have camp chairs, but if we had it would've been totally fine to set up by our car and chill until the doors opened or even wander around and talk to people. A crazy swirling dust storm whipped up for a few minutes so we just chilled in the car until the doors opened.
The entrance to the amphitheater from the Upper South lot is via a walk up a ramp that is STEEP but doable. Even my sister, who is in good shape, got a little winded. There was plenty of space and time to step to the side and catch our breath. Nobody was pushy or annoyed. We waited in line on the ramp for maybe 15 minutes and then were able to move through security. There were steps up to the security screening that were fine to navigate and not too difficult. Time to walk from car (front/middle of Upper South Lot) to security check point was less than 10 minutes total (not including wait time on the ramp).
I brought a draw string backpack (like the ones they give away at business conferences 😂). I had most of my things in a bunch of smaller bags and satchels-security didn't ask to go through any of the smaller bags. They had me open the top of my bag, kind of felt around, and asked if my water bottle was sealed. Easy peasy. There was a merch table to the left immediately upon entering. They were busy when we got in @ 6 (an hour before the show) but didn't have crazy long lines.
There are really nice bathrooms to your left as you walk towards the venue from this entrance. They are all gender bathrooms with big tall wooden doors/no gaps. It's like your own personal bathroom. These are the only bathrooms I used at the venue, before and during the show. I never waited more than 5-10 minutes in line.
The seating was broken up into GA sections and Reserved Seating sections. It was all clearly marked with ropes. We were in row 29, so not front row but not at the tippy top. The stairs are challenging, but again, we had plenty of space and time to stop and catch our breath. There are some hand railings on the left side but they do not go all the way up the amphitheater. So be aware that you may have to traverse stairs without the assistance of a railing.
My sister brought a picnic blanket that folds up with a handle. We unfolded it on our seats which was great to have this set out for once the shows got going and we wanted to sit and rest. We went right to our seats upon arriving. We really just took in the venue-the views and the vibes. The people watching is great. Each of us had time to check out merch, grab a drink, etc. I was not bored at all and was glad we went as early as we did. It made for a long day but it was worth it.
We only purchased 1 alcoholic seltzer and a bottle of water which were obviously expensive. I brought in 1 bottle of water (they have to be sealed) and wished I had brought 2. Everything is cashless-cards only. We did not try any of the food, although I saw a couple people go by with some tasty looking tacos and other fair style food. It would also be totally legit to throw a granola bar or sandwich into your bag if you think you'll need food (would definitely recommend if you are drinking). We ate right before we went to the venue and hit up a fast food drive thru at the end of the night and that was fine for us.
We had a group of people next to us-it was clear some of the friends had purchased Reserved tickets and their friends had GA tickets but were just going chill with their friends @ their Reserved seats - stacking each other 2-3 people deep per seat. They were nice and respectful. And during the openers I honestly didn't care. But before LCD started I did ask who all had tickets as the group was kinda jamming us up (they were obviously getting more and more intoxicated and dancing wider and wider into our seats). The guy who had the Reserved seat TOTALLY got it. I shared that we had come from out of state, paid for the reserved seats and this show was very important to me. He and his friends immediately apologized and had everyone on their best behavior, nobody was stepping in front of us during the show. We even kinda made friends with the dude and chatted a bit. His friends said something along the lines of 'oh we've only EVER been to GA shows so this assigned seating thing is hard.' 🙄 We had several people who were too drunk/high or trying to scam folks by being lost and unable to find their seats. They apparently decided to look for their seats 15 minutes into the LCD set. At that point in the game you are just out of luck. The seat numbers are on teeny tiny plaques that are not lit up. Figure out where your seats are before the chaos starts. We had to shoo them along because they were interrupting the show and weren't super aware of their behavior or surroundings.
I've read multiple articles and subs that have said marijuana is illegal to use in public! You can totally be arrested! This is definitely not the case. Everyone, everywhere was freely using drugs. It smelled of marijuana the whole show. Just a heads up if that bothers you. It is constant and potent. You can't get away from it, even in an outdoor venue! I had no problem with this but some people might care.
The show was at the end of May. I wore mid weight long pants, a t-shirt, and medium weight sweatshirt. This was the perfect outfit. No sweating and no shivering. We had a light comfortable breeze all night. It was a dream! I had packed a light jacket and rain poncho in my pack but didn't need either. This was easily stowed underneath our seats. I wore comfy running shoes. They aren't the most stylish but there is lots of uneven ground to traverse and you spend hours standing on cement which can be hard on the body and joints. Forget the cute heels for Red Rocks.
We stayed until the very end. MANY people left before the last song, I'm guessing to beat the traffic. Exiting the venue was slightly chaotic but uneventful. It took us 10-15 minutes to get back to the car. The ramp on the way back down is steep. I chose to use the hand railing just to be safe.
And then we zipped out of the Upper South Lot and down into Morrison in not even 5 minutes. We barely had to wait. I was expecting to sit for hours to exit per all the info I've read about parking at Red Rocks. It was a great surprise and a perk of going early!
I know this is a lot. Thanks if you read it all. Hoping by sharing I can inspire others to go. I was second guessing myself and my abilities prior to going and I'm so glad I didn't cancel! It was truly a once in a life time experience. Thanks to the info I found on reddit I felt pretty prepared and comfortable!

I haven't been to Deer Creek in awhile. Can you walk to the venue from the nearby Holiday Inn? Any recommendations for eats?

So I've been best friends with (not their real name, of course) Bethany for almost a year now. We spend every day together, text eachother constantly, have met eachother's respective families and she's even coming on holiday with my parents next week.
At the end of October last year, we started sleeping together regularly. It ranges from once to a few times a week. I'd also like to mention that she ended a 2 year relationship at the end of July, so it was still pretty fresh. A few months after we started sleeping together, around November, she confessed that she was in love with me. I told her that it seemed a little fast, but I felt the same.
In December, her ex boyfriend got back in touch and they went for coffee together for a talk. She told me about a month later they'd been regularly sleeping together, but they don't anymore. Of course I was hurt, but I wanted to be relaxed about it as we weren't in a relationship.
Even though we act as if we are in one, every time I've brought up a relationship, or moving towards one, she says it will come naturally and we shouldn't pressure it. Well, in April I found out that they still speak to eachother and she's been sending explicit pictures to him over Snapchat. It's also become a regular occurance that most weekends, when he's been out drinking, he will call her and ask if she can pick him up. She always says yes.
Even if we are lying in bed together at 1am, she will tell me I need to go home and leave to pick him up. I've expressed that I'm uncomfortable with this, but she says that she no longer sees him in "that way" anymore and tells me they're just friends. Sometimes he will sleep it off in her bed, but I'm assured that they are "on opposite sides".
I'm really unsure what to do. I don't want to ask her to stop seeing him, but I want my boundaries to be respected. I want to trust her but I've been cheated on multiple times in the past and don't want to put myself in that position again.
How can I learn to trust her, and how can I move towards a relationship without pressuring her?

I am not a native english speaker, apologies in advance! I am sorry i believe this communtiy is great!! always brings a smile on my face. This is an impulsive post haha i will probably delete it later. i typed this in one go, a bit impulsive and i am sorry if I come off wrong.
It is a really long text so I am already grateful for just posting it here. It is almost impossible to go through this illeterate english bible chapter haha so i understand.
Thanks again this forum is great! You guys are my inspiration; being proud of who you are, and seeing ADHD as something to embrace.
Well, The relationship lasted six years from ages 19 24. Despite his flaws, my partner was kind, patient, and loving when he didn't have anger issues.It was my first relationship, and I had never been in love or had sex before.
I always knew deep down that his actions were not okay, but he would confuse me with moments of kindness.
Now, in a moment of clarity, I realize how easily he made me feel like I was wrong and how it affected my self-esteem.I feel weak, embarrassed, and insecure after years of being with him. At the same time, I am really grateful for all the happy moments, and there is a part of me that feels like i am wrong for saying these things, as it is not "truly" him. I feel so weak, i tried therapy, but even my cogntive behavioral therapist literal words were "you have no identity" during hard topics you switch the subject, ask for validation. I spoke later with a counselor from school, who told me it is unproffesional and therapy can take a long time, so I should not be disencouraged.
The relationship had a negative impact on my mental health at the same time i never felt so happy in those good moments, so loved , and I now question if he played a role in my increased sadness and depression.He made me feel like I was on top of the world while kicking me down, and I feel like a failure.
However, I blocked out many negative moments because of the positive ones and realizing now so much more, such as these examples:
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• He sometimes displayed anger issues, including pushing me against a wall, mimicking me when I cried, breaking objects, and verbally abusing me.
• He often blamed me for his anger that "I made him do that" or "if you werent like this/or forgot that than I woudlnt have.." .for even small things like leaving cabinets open or misplacing items, calling me "a child" "dumb" "dramatic" , or to expressing my feelings, as he called it "complantingand i was pretending to be sad/ ADHD is a choice. I am aware it is not an excuse! It is an explenetation. i am just hurt that he would call me lazy, dumb, unwilling, careless, a child, stupid that i decide to feel like i do. he waited for me after i got diagnosed that day.. he held my hand, we sat at the table watching my results with my mom, holding my hand.
• There were instances where he embarrassed me in front of others, from screaming in public or when I was having a night with my girlfriedns at home, when he visited his family abroad, we had bottle of wine food, just moved into a new neighbourhood and our numbers got added to the neighborhood WhatsApp group: he called my up angry, claimed after leaving the house for one week, i am already busy with boys... i did not understand; he knew some people in the group, we had dinner with one neighbour before, I cried and felt embarrased in front of my friends, especially since i had not seen them for months and we had such a great time; these things happened more often when I would go out.
• or while shopping with my mom (he said he wanted to come) there was an irritation and he walked away in front of us
• He sometimes made hurtful comments and engaged in aggressive behavior, including suggesting I deserve to be fucked by other men, telling me I would regret everything, and speeding up the car during arguments. that he regrets ever talking to me, i am not worth it, i am never there for him, he will never talk to me again. At the same time he told me to believe in myself, supported me with my studies (while also telling me to drop out). He is verbally really strong and I am just confused. I was just happy when things were good, cause I loved him and wanted to hold on to that; without the anger i could have not wished for more.
• He broke up with me many times, told me afterwards he just said it out of anger did not mean anythinh.
• Last argument when my mom and sister went on a holiday (i have a thesis to write right now) he told me: no one wants you, even your family doesnt want you on a holiday with you. We facetimed a lot during that trip, they even bought gifts for my boyfriend and I. I just think right now it is so cruel that he said that.... cause it made me feel acutally at one point that it is true. actually somehow i still do that their life would be better without me in it.
• He would often leave me alone during arguments, even when we were abroad visiting his home country, leaving me feeling scared and isolated.
• screaming at me in public
• left me many time abroad alone; throwing a bike at me and telling me to get the fuck out, i was alone, no idea where to go, used google maps to find the nearest beach and bawled my eyes out at the shore. one time he even left me when my battery was low, so i had to wait for him to come back and i felt so weak.
• The last incident involved him leaving me alone in a restaurant while intoxicated, causing a scene, , i had to sit down and expressed that i wasnt feeling good, he screamed at me to stand the fuck up, and left me for a while. two women asked to help me and stayed next to me. He walked towards me and said in his native language to them that i am just crazy. I followed him home, he was marching in front of me saying it was over; i told him after all those years, how can we treat each other like that? He pushed me away and told me to go, and at home pack my bags. In panic, crying , searching a flight i stood at the door; he cried and asked to come back.
• There were still TWO DAYS to go; i stayed, even went to a museum with him, bought a book as a gift. my heart was broken; he said that he wanted to respect me as when he felt that we hugged i needed time, I was just relieved somehow that it was over; it wasnt. When i didnt want to have sex that night..we argued again and the broke a chair
• The next morning he walked out of the door and did not say a word when i tried to talk( in the meantime when he left, i walked to the kitchen and talked to his roommate, a girl that offered me her number in case i need help, hit up if she is in my home coutnry, just i thought). i saw it as a nice gesture, girl talk.
• when he came home with the flowers in his hand, and he knew that i talked to his roommate, he gave me the flowers angry; he asked me to not engage with "these people" but i told him it is nothing. Later i was unappreciated cause i was confused about the flowers and his anger. He told me 'i wanted to give you flowers and have sex' you disrespect me, you do not have to be kind to her, but to me'. i was utterly confused and sad. he screamed, (threw something again everybody heard and i felt embarrased). when i walked into the kitchen again i did not even dare to look at her when he was making sandwiches.
• That day i had to fly home, i brought the flowers, even held his hand in the buss, he made me a sandwhich for on the way which i thought was nice. I was still incredibly sad about everything that happened; but i felt bad for him somehow. I even send him a pic of the flower in the plane, i bought his favorite comic book at the airport so he could read it when he visits me next time. Now i feel so stupid, i dont know how to feel about it.
• I am really embarrased for thine one ... that same day he stepped out of the car in font of the traffic light, (i had no drivers license) he caught me at my collar and grabbed me shaking in the car, i was so scared i scratched his neck and pushed him off me. he walked out of the car, the alarm went off, no idea how to close it, had no keys, i looking for him around at night crying. I hated myself seeing the scratches in his neck, i still feel so bad for this day. I remember every time i saw it i cried, apologized, walked out of the room, i felt so sad for him, when he smiled at me the next moring at the breakfast table, he was calm, holding my hand. we did not talk about it, never
• Now i realize: why did he touch me? Why dont i stand stiill with why I felt unsafe? I know it is no exccuse what i did. but i feel weak for never bringing it up once again. I suffer from heavy eczema since a child, scratching myself at night. These motngs are worse and i somehow think i deserve it cause of what i did to him

He had many good qualities and gestures, such as driving long distances to see me, planning romantic outings, being great with children and animals, and cooking for me every single day cause he liked to do so, plannign surprise birthdays for my mom, driving my mom to the hospital, he could be very positive overall and joyful; people, everyone around me loved him and would say; it is easy to love him
Now listening back to the voice messages i send, i notice once i brought up the fact that the arguments were not okay, he told me he doesnt deserve that, i should find somebody else, that i cannot reapeat this a thousand times it is not true.
I supported him throughout the years, i told him that he doesnt deserve to feel this way in his anger cause he is amazing and I am sorry for him and with help we can overcome this. He ironically joked"youre gonna pay for my sessions"?. He spends 400 euros in the month on weed (i am cool with smoking, i do it too sometimes), but then i am a bit sad that he does not want to (as he has the money) and never saw the point.
At the same time, he told me during the break up that i can call him, i should date other people (after one week), and he was serious since he wanted to build a future with me, house, baby and all. He even gave me a diamond ring, which could be symboliic seen he said as a step he said.
I dont think he has any idea......
I am angry at myself for tolerating this behavior and not recognizing the signs earlier.
I always felt guilty for small mistakes and felt like something was wrong with me.
​
I have a study delay and an unfinished thesis. he graudated before me and found a job in the meantime, drove every weekend two hours to see me. he wanted to move abroad with me.
i was not feeling so great in my skin, and i expressed that i wanted to be more strong, independent, before moving together abroad; i always ignored that deep down I was afraid of not having enough backbone in arguments, and i was afraid abroad in case if i would be alone, plus somehow i still feel like i am not good enough. I am still not graduated (thesis in two weeks to deliver help and i am typing this impulsive text).
​
Despite his claims of putting more effort into the relationship I realize that I never felt safe enough and always wanted to proof myself. Hoenstly I still want to, for my fam, for him, myself. I just want to be worth.
I apologized repeatedly in voice messages, reminiscing about the good times and questioning what I could have done differently.
​
Anyways i dont want to self pitty myself, i am grateful to have a roof on top of my head, a family that loves me, food on the table, i am healthy, there are so many blessings.
I am sorry if i come off like i am not grateful. i am sorry if i come off unconsiderable.
I just dont know what to do, what to feel, what to think.
​
It feels like i am standing still for so long... It is my fault cause i allowed all these things.
​
I havent seen my friends for more than a year. One week ago a friend came for dinner , this already makes me happy that it is a step in the right direction !
I really dont like who i am. why cant i be more strong?
honestly it feels that i am doing something wrong, speaking so badly about him. I feel guilty and embarassed of myself. He was really kind and loving. I wonder if I would have been more strong, maybe he wouldnt disrespect me like that. Maybe I allowed him too, and I did. So it is my fault.
Still doesnt make it alright.
I hope one day to love myself. Especially before a raise a daughter of my own, Maybe if I ever did, this wouldnt have happened. I am so sad

I know that itll be sometime this year, but am hoping for a more exact time frame

Here's the background story: My girlfriend and I have been together for 2.5 years, and she recently went on a holiday to surprise her aunt for her birthday. When she returned, I went to pick her up, and she told me she had made a new friend during her trip. She spoke highly of him and mentioned that they had arranged to go swimming together that morning.
I felt a bit uncomfortable when she told me this, so I asked her if anything had happened between them. She reassured me that nothing had occurred and mentioned that he had a girlfriend. Some weeks passed, during which I had some time off. On Wednesday, we had a conversation where she asked me what was bothering me. I explained that I felt uncomfortable about the situation and asked her to explain it again. I can't recall the exact words I used, but she responded by saying that she had briefly felt attracted to him but immediately thought of me and dismissed those feelings.
During our discussion, we touched upon the topic of open relationships. Personally, I don't believe that open relationships can work in the long term, and I expressed this to her. She completely understood and said that she didn't think it would work for her either. She then asked if she should stop talking to her new friend, to which I replied, "No, I don't want to be that kind of boyfriend."
A few days later, I might have snooped a little and went in her phone, and I noticed that she was still talking with her guy friend. They were sharing non-intimate pictures of her walking in the forest, nothing like selfies or intimate moments. She mentioned going for a walk and suggested that he join her when he arrived. They also talked about cooking for each other. She informed him about our serious conversation. The next day, they even had a phone call. I can't help but feel that she might not be completely honest with me, although I'm aware that my thoughts might be clouded by trust issues.
I need some genuine advice, not just "break up" advice. I understand that I should talk to her again, and I intend to do so. I find it peculiar because she's the type of person who often says, "I don't trust men" and doesn't have many male friends. However, they met, and within three days, they were swimming together in the morning.
Small update: I know it's normal to feel attracted to someone else occasionally.
Does someone have advise for me?
Just somethings I forgot to add.
- He lives in another country, but plans to move to the country I live.
- I've never met him.
- There has not been said anything intimate in chat.
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Update:
Thank you for all the advice.
I talked to her and asked if the guy she was with was in an open relationship. She confirmed that he was.
I questioned whether it seemed suspicious that she went for a swim with him at 6 am, knowing he was in an open relationship. She explained that she would have preferred that experience with me and that she simply wanted to swim under the full moon. She assured me that their friendship was purely platonic and she didn't want to entertain any other thoughts. She told me that when he brought her home she had that feeling of attraction for a slight moment. And feld instant guild.
I then asked her if she would find it suspicious if I did something similar, to which she replied that she would and begged for forgiveness. She cried and asked if I was considering breaking up with her. I responded by saying that I wasn't sure yet. Her tears intensified, and she promised that she would never do anything like that again. She offered to block him on all platforms for me. She expressed her unwillingness to pursue an open relationship if it meant losing me. She also shared her desire to be with me, get married, and have children. She expressed her willingness to do whatever it takes to rebuild my trust in her.
She also mentioned that having an open relationship might be beneficial for me, aswel it would alleviate any feelings of guilt if something were to happen. However, I reiterated that I didn't desire to be with anyone else besides her while in a committed relationship. In response, she suggested that her desire for a dopamine hit might be related to ADHD (as we both have ADHD). I dismissed her suggestion once again, and she stated that she was okay with that decision.
She also mentioned that she hadn't discussed our conversation with him, but I'm unsure if she actually refrained from doing so. In their chat, she referenced our "tough conversation" and mentioned that she planned to call him tomorrow to inform him about it. She expressed her belief that we would be okay and that, for the time being, she wanted to spend time with me and relax.
She suggested that I could meet him when he moves to our country and that we could potentially become good friends.

Amelia was fast.
Jax couldn’t keep up with her. The moment she stepped out of Brynn’s inn, she vanished. He was certain that it took her longer to walk out of the room from when she first heard the aftershocks of the explosion than it took her to arrive at her destination.
Even the Forsaken Archer hadn’t yet reached the battlefield. He could see the smoke rising up ahead in between the two hills. The valley had been torn apart— an armored caravan had been stopped by a landslide, and a large crater had been burrowed open right next to it.
A legion of soldiers fled the scene, running away as fast as they could as they screamed in terror. Jax leapt over them. He barely paid them any mind. That was the expected reaction when faced with someone as insanely overpowered as Amelia.
And he was in a rush. He didn’t want to miss out on seeing her in action. After all, he had only seen her in battle against him. He never had a chance to observe and analyze the brown-haired human in a fight against someone else.
“Perhaps I can use that information to defeat her in a duel one day…” Jax whispered softly to himself.
He knew it was a day that was far off. In fact, he was very much aware that it might not even ever happen. Still, it was good to dream— to strive for greatness.
He chuckled to himself as he landed right before the valley. He saw the recognizable, billowing cloak Amelia wore just ahead. She was facing down a high-leveled [Mage] standing atop an armored wagon. Jax shook his head.
“Perhaps one day…”
—--
I stared at the woman dressed in dark robes standing before me. She looked like a wizard of sorts— she even had a long pointy hat that sparkled in the darkness. It was morning, but the column of smoke rising to the sky blotted out the sun, casting a dark shadow over the caravan.
Unlike Rokh the annoying dead guy and Seth the other annoying dead guy, I didn’t know this woman’s name. She hadn’t introduced herself. But even after seeing what I did to the both of them, she still insisted on stopping me from freeing Guildmaster Evan.
I sighed as I raised my sword. “Let’s get this over with…”
But before I could do anything, a voice cried out. I glanced back, looking at Giles— the man I had just saved.
“B-be careful!” he said as he stumbled forward. “Eloise the Dark Wizard is incredibly powerful. She’s an S-ranked mercenary— she doesn’t even work with a group because of her overwhelming magical prowess!”
Eloise and I both looked his way. Giles gritted his teeth, averting his gaze.
“I know you’re a strong [Warrior], but you must always be careful of these tricky [Mages]...”
“A tricky [Mage], huh?” The Dark Wizard tilted her head curiously. “My, my. I am surprised that that is the reputation I have gained. I am quite a direct combatant if I must say so myself.”
I narrowed my eyes as I stared at her. “You’re S-ranked?”
“Indeed, I am.” She nodded in response. “I am surprised that you could not infer that yourself. Is this your first time meeting an S-ranked individual like me?”
“No,” I said as I shook my head. I took a step forward, gesturing vaguely at her. “I’ve fought some S-ranked guys before— but you’re just…”
I paused. Eloise raised a brow. She peered curiously at me as I scratched my chin. I thought about all the S-ranked threats I had fought. I thought about the black lightning bolt she had conjured earlier— the one which I deflected to save Giles.
And I shrugged. “You’re just so much weaker than them. I thought you were only A-ranked, to be honest.”
And that made the Dark Wizard blink as Giles physically recoiled. He pointed at me, trying to work his jaw.
“W-w-what do you mean by that?” he asked, gesticulating wildly at me. “Eloise is the Dark Wizard! I’ve heard that she’s at least Level 63—”
“Well, I have no idea what level Jax was at when I fought him,” I cut him off as I cocked my head back in thought. “But he was way stronger than this.”
Eloise frowned as she hopped off the armored wagon. “Jax? Do you mean the Forsaken Archer?”
She looked me up and down suspiciously. I nodded casually, waving a hand off.
“Yeah, that’s him,” I said simply. “I mean— he’s kinda weak too. But compared to you? He’s way stronger.”
“That’s because he’s one of the highest-leveled adventurers in the entire world.” Eloise pursed her lips as she stared at me in disbelief. “Some even say that he is the highest-leveled adventurer. How could you have possibly defeated him…?”
I waved a hand dismissively at the Dark Wizard. “It was easy. I just punched him in the face, and it was over.”
“That’s it?” she asked, wide-eyed.
“That’s it,” I repeated after her.
Giles rubbed his temples as he collapsed back to the ground. He stared at me, a shell-shocked expression on his face. “You can’t be serious… right?”
“If you really want to—” I started as I glanced past the abandoned convoy. “You could ask Jax about it yourself.”
“What?” Giles blinked.
Eloise’s eyes went round as she spotted the figure standing at the very edge of the battlefield. He wore a hooded cloak, but the hood was down, revealing his pointed ears. He had a bow slung around his shoulders as his arms were crossed over his chest.
“That’s… Jax?” she whispered softly.
And the Forsaken Archer clicked his tongue. “Oi, Amelia! I came here to watch a fight, not to listen to you run your mouth!”
Eloise took a step back as she stared at him. “Impossible…”
Meanwhile, Giles just lowered his head. He looked back, before walking slowly away from me. “I… I should go check on my team…”
“Yeah, you do that,” I said flatly. I turned to face Jax as he harrumphed in the distance. “Anyways, I kicked your ass, right?”
The elf held his chin high as he scoffed. “It was a grueling and hard-fought battle. A legendary duel between the two strongest individuals in all of Vacuos! Both sides incurred grievous wounds, and it was looking like it could be anyone’s victory. But at the very last moment, I—”
“Jax.” I glared at him, and he flinched.
He cleared his throat, looking away from me. “...and Amelia prevailed in the end.”
Well, while he embellished the story somewhat, he ended up telling the truth in the end. So I nodded— not approvingly, but accepting that that was the best I could get out of him. I turned to Eloise as I gestured at him.
“See?”
“I… I…” The Dark Wizard just stared as she tried to work her jaw. Even just earlier, after seeing me defeat a pair of high-leveled soldiers with ease, she still wore a calm look on her face. But now, she couldn’t even find the right words to say.
I crossed my arms at her as I waited expectantly. “So are you still going to get in my way? Or are you actually going to do the sensible thing and step aside?”
“But my contract…” Eloise hesitated. She glanced between me and the Forsaken Archer, before pausing. For whatever reason, she seemed to stare at him longingly— as if she knew him.
However, Jax didn’t return that gaze. He just wore the same disgruntled look he always wore when he wasn’t fighting. He noticed the way she was staring at him, before his brows snapped together.
“What?” he asked.
Eloise winced. She looked away from him as she bit her lower lip. I didn’t know what was wrong with her, but that seemed like it was enough to convince her. She finally raised her hands in the air, defeated.
“I surrender,” she sighed.
“Thank you.” I nodded at her as I sheathed my blade.
I wasn’t going to question it. I was just glad that she wasn’t going to get in my way too. I walked past her as she hung her head, and I came to a halt right before the armored wagon. I glanced back once. I could see Giles in the distance, applying healing potions to his injured men, and Jax just milling about with a bored look on his face.
I turned back to the armored wagon and reached out for the enchanted metal doorway. I ripped it right off with ease as a sliver of light poured into the dark room. A figure shifted within— chained and ragged.
A bloodied face peeked out of the shadows, staring up at me. But despite the state he was in, I still recognized him. His eyes went wide as he saw me, and I proffered him a hand.
“Amelia…?” Guildmaster Evan asked.
“Hey,” I said as I nodded at him. “I’m here to save you.”

Author's Notes: Start of the new month! Just so you know, book 3 has started over on patreon if you subscribe now :) You can read up to 15 chapters ahead on my patreon here! Join my discord and subscribe to my subreddit! Or follow me on twitter!

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I’m non binary and bisexual and my friend who’s straight started sharing her views on pride completely unprompted. She started talking about how she doesn’t understand why pride needs to be a month long and how it’s “all so loud” and “shoved in her face.” She said she doesn’t understand why anything needs to be a spectacle and why can’t people just be who they are without “forcing everyone else to be witness it.” This girl has been my friend since high school (we’re both 26) and she’s always been supportive. She’s never expressed anything like this about pride before. So, I tried to be understanding and told her that pride originally started as a protest but now it’s sort of more of a commercial holiday and I get why all of the ads and products are an overkill. I don’t like the commercial aspect of pride either. I said I enjoy Christmas but all December it’s like shoved in our face and takes the fun out of it especially working in retail. The overkill isn’t gay people celebrating pride it’s rainbow capitalism. Her response was “I don’t see how Christmas and pride are the same and Christmas is only one day.” God that was a DENSE thing of her to say. At that point I dropped the subject because I felt exhausted. Honestly all of the transphobic and homophobic propaganda lately it’s really been getting to me and now having to hear that Shit from someone I considered a close friend is very very hard. I don’t know what to do. I don’t have that many friends and this friend has been there for me through a lot. I’m torn.

Thank you very much in advance.
At the crossroads of shattered dreams and whispered promises, Iria, the fabled port city, stood as a testament to the bittersweet allure of freedom. Like the thorny embrace of a briar, its streets intertwined with the hopes and sorrows of generations. It was here, amidst the misty twilight that caressed the cobblestones, that the Briar Thorn Tavern emerged from the depths of history, a sanctuary for weary souls seeking solace from the burdens of existence. Within its timeworn walls, the essence of Iria's foundation permeated the air, as if the tavern itself carried the weight of the city's destiny.
The Briar Thorn was more than a mere tavern—it was a haven, a hearth that welcomed the downtrodden, the restless, and the lost. Its aged beams, polished by countless hands, exuded the warmth of an ancestral embrace. The whispers of ancient tales echoed in every nook and cranny, intertwining with the hushed murmurs of patrons seeking refuge from the tempestuous world outside. Here, adventurers found respite, their journeys converging in a symphony of shared experiences.
Deep beneath the streets of Iria, a labyrinthine network of tunnels and caverns whispered secrets of a forgotten past. Legends spoke of the Nords, who sculpted these subterranean realms with a mystical glow that once illuminated the city above. Whispers carried the stories of Gillikristr, the visionary founder of Iria, whose sacrifice quelled the unearthly power that threatened to consume the city. Within this hidden realm, the House of the Red Grave stood as a poignant reminder of the struggle for emancipation. Weathered gravestones, adorned with intricate carvings, paid homage to the Caledonian and Iournenain slaves who dared to defy their chains.
As the doors of the Briar Thorn swung open, a kaleidoscope of sensations flooded the senses. Thorny roses, reminiscent of the House of the Red Grave, adorned the tavern, their crimson petals an homage to the sacrifices made for freedom. Within, the cavernous chamber unfolded like an amphitheater, its tiers of benches teeming with anticipation. Laughter mingled with the resonant notes of musicians, filling the air with a vibrant symphony of revelry.
In this enchanted realm, patrons embarked on a journey beyond the boundaries of mundane existence. The Briar Thorn embraced them, weaving their stories into the tapestry of Iria's ever-evolving narrative. It was a place where the past danced with the present, where the weight of the world momentarily lifted, and where the echoes of forgotten heroes found solace in the hearts of the living.
Adorned in her finest party attire, Isabel navigated the bustling crowd, fiery curls flowing like molten copper, half pinned up and half dancing freely in the wind. Her lute accompanied her, while she, a half-dwarf, wore a unique half-leather, half-silk bodice dress in eggshell white-yellow, adorned with red trim. A wide belt cinched her waist, with a well-maintained sword hanging at her hip. With ethereal grace, she weaved through the throng until finding solace in a quiet corner of the lively pub, fixated on an intricately engraved ledger.
Dust motes mingled with the blue-white illumination of the lamppost, as the pub owner's middle daughter opened the book and studied its contents. Her green eyes fixated on precise rows of figures. A faint murmur escaped her lips, a silent conversation with the ghosts of numbers.
Her mischievous grin curved upon porcelain features, reflecting the intrigue that stirred within her. With a single finger, she traced a curving figure on her account, a sly grin curling into an incredulous smile. The past month had been exceptional, favored patrons generously bestowing their coins. A mysterious benefactor, surely taking notice.
'Och gods...the ink's bleedin' through,' Isabel thought to herself. The accounts, usually orderly and precise, now seemed to mirror the joyful chaos surrounding her.
'Guess I'd best get this in order before folk start gettin' drunk an' cause too much a' ruckus...'
After nearly several minutes of writing she leaned back in her chair, stretched, and yawned hard. Her weary green eyes glanced over the darkening floor of the inn, and she raised a hand to rub at her jaw. She tried her her best to avoid the calls of the raucous crowd in favor of getting the ledgers out of the way.
It was to no avail. The strain of the work clearly taking its toll, she let out a determined sig and closed the ledger, setting it aside with the intention to revisit it.
Isabel's gaze shifted from the ledger book to the adorned walls. Festive decorations filled every corner, transforming the tavern into a celebration itself. The tantalizing aromas from the kitchen hinted at delightful treats prepared with extra care, each dish a tribute to the upcoming revelry. Amidst the lively crowd, vibrant decorations, and alluring scents, Isabel felt a sense of purpose and excitement. It was clear that a grand festival was approaching, and she was determined to create unforgettable memories for the attendees.
With a resigned sigh, Isabel straightened herself, her red stilettos scraping the stone floor as she prepared for her tavern rounds. Her green eyes sparkled with determination as she surveyed The Briar Thorn's lively atmosphere. Adjusting her party outfit, she ensured every detail was perfect. This was her moment to shine, to captivate the hearts of those gathered. Stepping forward as the tavern doors swung open, she embraced the spirited celebration that awaited her and the people of Iria.
"Guid evenin' tae ye all! Ye're lookin' bonnie, ye are. Micht I tempt ye wi' a warmin' ale or a cool stout? Or maybe a cider? We've a special brew fer ye tonight. Our cider's been aged in dragon fire-hardened casks."
In the midst of the vibrant tavern, all eyes converged on the resplendent figure that graced the stage of the Briar Thorn. A flame-haired maiden, adorned with an intricate tapestry of freckles, commanded attention with each movement, a testament to her practiced grace and unyielding confidence. The air crackled with anticipation as the bard's emerald eyes met those of her audience, mischief sparkling within their depths. With a playful wink, she set off a chorus of hearty laughter, an orchestration of mirth resonating through the space.
Among the sea of eager faces, a burly man, boasting a thick black beard and wielding an imposing war hammer, raised a hand, his voice booming above the fray. "I'll take two."
Suppressing a contagious burst of laughter, Isabel delicately clasped a hand over her lips, a radiant smile illuminating her features. "Two ciders, then, comin' up," she responded with a melodious lilt.
Unyielding in their desire for libations, another voice chimed in, belonging to a stern-looking woman whose scowl mirrored the sharpness of the war axe slung across her back. Leaning forward in her chair, she waved her hand, demanding attention. "We'll take two as well."
The large man, undeterred by the rising clamor, added his voice to the mix. "Three, then. And a pitcher of your best stout, if you would be so kind."
Amidst the boisterous revelry, the tavern erupted in a chorus of laughter, cascading like a waterfall of mirth. Isabel, ever the enchantress of the stage, acknowledged the uproar with a graceful bow at the waist, her every movement a testament to her showmanship. "Of course. I'll tend to that in a moment," she assured, a playful wink accentuating her words. "Now, as I was sayin', I'll get yer orders in a minute."
A burly man, his eyes twinkling with mischievous delight, directed his attention toward Isabel, a crooked smile gracing his lips as he ran a hand through his bushy beard. A war hammer nonchalantly slung over his shoulder and a massive war axe tucked in his belt added to his formidable presence. "Hey Izzie, yer gonna be performing tonight? Or do I need tae bless the dancers again?"
In response, Isabel's laughter danced through the air, a joyous melody in harmony with the crackling firelight. "Nah, I'm performin' tonight. Though ye might have tae beat my record," she teased, her voice laced with a playful challenge. A sly wink directed at her brother punctuated her words. "I think I might set a new one."
The burly man's eyes widened, their dark depths shimmering with excitement. "Aye? That's impressive! That's better than our last record. Did ye hear about that?"
Isabel's curiosity piqued, her emerald eyes narrowing as she shielded them from the flickering firelight, sweeping the room in search of answers. "No, I dinnae," she replied, her voice filled with anticipation. "Who was it?"
With a conspiratorial lean forward, the man shared his knowledge in a hushed tone, as if guarding a precious secret. "Our new patron. We're to be blessed by him tonight. We've a few others too, but the lads were talking about him earlier."
A spark of excitement ignited within Isabel, her voice taking on a hushed tone to match the weight of the revelation. "A patron? That's wonderful! Who is he? Does he have a name?"
Isabel's vibrant emerald eyes widened with eager anticipation as the burly man confirmed the identity of the mysterious patron.
A man with hazel eyes, clad in an intricately embroidered jacket and pants of fine silk, strode confidently toward the stage. The crimson-lacquered armor that adorned his form seemed to shimmer in the light, like the ruby at the end of a rosebud. A regal demeanor seemed to permeate every gesture as he surveyed the crowd, his posture betraying the confidence of his stature. With an easy grace, he settled on a chair, his eyes locking with those of Isabel's. A smile played on his lips as he motioned for her to join him, a clear command in his demeanor.
A wide smile stretched across her face, illuminating her freckled visage. "He's a bard like me?" she exclaimed, her voice laced with excitement. "I cannae wait!"
With a quizzical expression, the man raised an eyebrow, leaning in closer to share a whispered revelation. "Not exactly," he revealed, his tone tinged with intrigue. "He's quite different. I don't think you'll see many of his kind at The Briar Thorn, if you know what I mean."
Isabel nodded, her curiosity now piqued, her mind conjuring visions of the enigmatic newcomer. "I do. I've been told they're rare," she confided, a soft giggle escaping her lips. "I wonder what he looks like? I hope he's not one a' them."
In response, the man chuckled, his cheeks flushing as he met her infectious smile. "I doubt it. He should be back in a few. Left his ledger with Gerik."
The mention of the ledger prompted Isabel to stifle another burst of laughter, her hand pressed against her mouth. "Och, that was his? I was in there earlier, and it's a mess," she admitted, a mischievous glimmer in her eyes.
The man's face contorted into a perplexed grimace, his confusion evident. "Aye? You looked like it was all in order." He shook his head, puzzled. "Weird. Guess he's just new... though that doesn't explain why he speaks so... peculiarly. Claims he's from Draigfell, yet he talks like he's from a different continent."
Isabel chuckled, her voice laced with amusement. "He's from the north. Maybe he's more... formal? Aye, that sounds like it," she pondered, her eyes distant as she mulled over the possibilities.
The man shrugged, leaning back in his chair, his tone one of indifference. "Aye, that makes sense." He raised his hand and signaled to a busty lass who was weaving through the crowd toward the bar.
Eyes glued to the mysterious patron, intrigued, Isabel leaned forward with her curiosity eager to unveil the mysteries surrounding the enigmatic Micah. "Aye? What does he say?" she inquired, her tone infused with genuine interest.
With a bemused shrug, the man struggled to articulate his observations. "Ah... nothing much. Just strange," he confessed, his voice laced with a mixture of intrigue and perplexity. "Maybe he's just not used to taverns."
The burly man, his eyes glimmering with excitement, clasped Isabel's shoulder and pulled her into a warm embrace. "He's coming back here later tae join us. Maybe ye can find out why this Micah fellow left us so much gold. You'll have tae tell me later."
A smile blossomed across Isabel's features as she leaned forward and hugged her brother tightly. "I will," she promised, her eyes twinkling with joy. "But I cannae tell ye why ye're getting so much coin."
"We'll figure it out, ye'll see. Ye better get ready to perform," he insisted. "An' get that ledger in order."
Isabel nodded and turned toward the kitchen, her steps sure and graceful. "Aye, I will," she assured. "I'll be back with yer drinks soon."
With a parting smile, Isabel gracefully glided toward the kitchen, her freckled face glowing in the flickering light. The tapestry of laughter and merrymaking resonated within her as she emerged, ready to fulfill her promise of delivering three orders. The Briar Thorn Tavern thrived with the boisterous banter of adventurers, their stories and camaraderie filling every nook. Amidst the lively crowd, Isabel weaved her way, greeted by a raising mug and reciprocating with a mischievous wink. Laughter harmonized with the crackling firelight, but her focus remained on the enigmatic patron.
After deftly fulfilling the orders and sating the thirst of eager patrons, Isabel embarked on a purposeful journey toward the table where the enigmatic Micah sat. A flicker of anticipation ignited within her, a fire stoked by the allure of the unknown. Every step she took exuded a captivating showmanship, a ballet of grace and poise. As her emerald eyes met his hazel gaze, a current of intrigue surged through her veins, ensnaring her curiosity in its enigmatic grasp.
Approaching with measured elegance, Isabel bestowed upon him a subtle bow, a testament to her refined demeanor practiced countless times. Her movements, like a finely choreographed dance, exuded an air of cultivated grace. The sweep of her arm and the dip of her head were executed with precise control, each gesture crafted to convey both respect and a hint of playful intrigue. It was a performance perfected through countless repetitions, a display of practiced finesse that now played out before Micah's watchful gaze.
"It's good to see ye're 'ere," said Micah, his tone measured and confident, his Draig accent adding a sing-song lilt to his words. His hazel eyes glimmered with intrigue as he studied her, a curious smile gracing his features. "I see Gerik raised 'is children well. 'ow are ye feelin'?"
Isabel's eyes narrowed as she scrutinized his face, studying him as if she were peering into the depths of his soul. Her demeanor remained composed as she regarded the enigmatic Micah. "I'm fine. We've been talkin' about ye," she admitted as she twirled a lock of hair between her fingers.
Micah nodded, his posture betraying his composure. "I'm sure ye have," he said.
'Ah dinnae know ye," Isabelle asked, twirling a lock of hair between her fingers. "Do ye want me tae get ye somethin' tae eat?"
"I'm fine," Micah said, as he brushed off the concern with a casual flick of his hand, his grin spreading like sunlight on a dew-kissed meadow. The charm in his words danced with the musicality of a whispered melody, ensnaring Isabel's attention further into his web. "I'm Micah, a fa'miliar face 'at 'as graced these walls fer twenty-five years. The bonds o' friendship 'ave woven through the tapestry o' time, connectin' yer family and mine in a shared 'istory."
"So ye're a bard, like me," Isabel exclaimed, her eyes dancing with excitement and anticipation. "I've heard rumors of yer arrival at the tavern. Tell me, what 'appened tae yer band? Where have they gone?"
"I'm the last o' me band," Micah admitted, a tinge of melancholy seeping into his voice as he reminisced about his companions. "They were swept away by a tempest, lost to the unforgiving storm. I miss them dearly. They still visit me in dreams," he confided, a solitary tear glistening in his expressive eye.
Isabel's voice resonated with warmth and empathy as she extended her condolences. "I'm truly sorry tae hear o' yer loss," she offered sincerely. "Ye dinnae speak much 'bout yerself, but I'm eager tae know ye better. How 'bout we share a meal together? We can talk and ye can share yer story."
"That would be delightful," Micah replied, his countenance softening as he bestowed her with a genuine smile. "I would enjoy that greatly."
A genuine smile graced Isabel's freckled visage, brimming with delight. "Wonderful! I'll fetch ye a meal," she promised, her voice tinged with enthusiasm. "What tickles yer fancy?"
"Anything will suffice," Micah responded, his tone imbued with sincere interest. "I have the coin. I'll be waitin' 'ere for ye."
Isabel's smile blossomed as she nodded in agreement, his genuine tone assuring her of his welcome. She directed her attention towards the bustling kitchen, her mind ablaze with thoughts of crafting a delectable menu for her newfound companion. The tantalizing scent of freshly prepared cuisine mingled with the symphony of clinking pots and pans, captivating Isabel's senses.
'I reckon a savory meat pie or a plate of spiced vegetables would be to his likin'. I don't think he's fond of overly spicy fare.'
Isabel's imagination swirled with culinary possibilities as she surveyed the kitchen, her eyes darting between the diligent kitchen staff and the array of tantalizing ingredients. Contemplating her options, hands confidently resting on her hips, she made her way towards the bustling heart of the kitchen, her gaze lingering on the savory treasures at hand.
After careful consideration, Isabel selected the perfect meal that would both cater to Micah's palate and ignite his taste buds with delight. A sly smile played upon her lips as she emerged from the kitchen, carrying a plate brimming with culinary delights. The aroma of the freshly prepared feast permeated the air, adding to the festive ambiance of the tavern.
With a warm smile gracing her features, Isabel approached Micah, the alluring scent of the food enveloping them. "Here ye are!" she exclaimed, her eyes sparkling with anticipation. "I've got somethin' special for ye. Ye're bound tae love it."
"I have no doubt," Micah assured her, his curiosity piqued as he returned her smile. "Thank ye kindly."
Placing the plate before him, Isabel gestured towards the enticing dish, her eyes shimmering with excitement. "Go on now! Give it a try!" she encouraged eagerly. "It's one o' the tavern's finest specialties."
As his gaze fixated upon the presented meal, Micah's eyes widened in pleasant surprise. "A fine choice," he acknowledged, curiosity lacing his words. "Though dinnae ye 'ave a performance soon? Shouldn't ye be preparin'?"
"I shall," Isabel urged with a playful glimmer in her eyes. "Just try it."
With a glint of mischief in his eyes, Micah nodded, his fingers gently tracing the contours of the freshly baked crust as he studied the meal before him. "Aye, I will," he assured, his brogue adding a touch of charm. "I'm sure it'll be a feast for the senses."
Isabel's fiery waves of hair, tamed and cascading down her back, framed her face with a wild elegance. She slipped into her performance costume, the fabric embracing her like a second skin, its deep green hue accentuating her curves. The subtle reveal of skin hinted at a hidden sensuality, while the golden cuff, shaped like a wolf's mouth, added an enchanting touch. She could almost feel the spirit of Caledonia whispering through the intricate design, igniting her spirit.
A knock on the dressing room door interrupted her reverie, and the voice of Archie, the stage director, filtered through. "Isabel, are ye ready? The stage awaits."
She turned toward the door, a radiant smile illuminating her face. "Almost there, Archie. Just a few finishing touches."
Stepping out of the dressing room, Isabel found Archiewaiting, his eyes widening with awe at her transformation. His voice softened, filled with admiration. "Isabel, ye look absolutely stunning. The crowd won't ken what hit them."
Isabel's laughter danced through the air, her voice carrying a mixture of excitement and determination. "Thank ye, Archie. But it's not just about the looks. Tonight, I'll weave a tale that'll stir their hearts, ignite their spirits, and leave them yearning for more. Tonight, Caledonia will come alive on this very stage."
Archie, resonating in her words, nodded, his eyes reflecting a profound understanding of her power. "I have nae doubt, Isabel. Ye possess a gift—a voice that carries the stories of our land, the dreams of our people. They'll be captivated, enchanted by yer every note."
Isabel took a final deep breath, feeling the energy of the night pulsating through her veins.
"Together, Archie," Isabel whispered, her voice filled with determination. "Tonight, we'll create magic."
And with that, they stepped into the hallway, the sounds of anticipation and muffled conversation filling the air. The stage awaited, the audience yearned, and Isabel was ready to cast her spell, leaving an indelible mark on the hearts of those who would join her in this symphony of life.
The curtains drew back, revealing the expectant faces of the crowd, their eyes alight with anticipation. Isabel took her place at the center of the stage, her gaze sweeping across the sea of faces, her voice a velvety caress that cut through the silence.
"Listen closely, mah friends," she began, her voice filled with a tantalizing blend of mystery and longing, her Scottish lilt enchanting every syllable. "For tonight, I shall unveil the hidden melodies that reside within the soul of Iria. Tonight, we embark on a journey of love and loss, triumph and despair. Let yer hearts be swept away by the stories that dance upon the threads of our existence."
And so it began. The tavern exploded with applause as Isabel gracefully stepped to the side of the stage, beckoning to her audience as she sang the opening verse of the ballad. All fell silent as the rain battered the cobblestones outside, protecting the warmth of the firelight.

First: https://redd.it/11e34ce
Previous: https://redd.it/13vxbow
Quin’s sleep was largely dreamless, save for a fleeting glimpse of a magnetic pad falling onto Mae, crushing her dead. But when the pad was lifted, Tess’s body, riddled with the Gaian plague, was found underneath.
He woke with a start and knew some time had passed, though he didn’t know if it was the middle of the night or the next day. Louis had his feet up on the bed, leaning back on two legs in his desk chair. He was humming a soft tune similar in rhythm to the song and was lost in something he was reading. Feeling Quin stir, he looked up from the screen and smiled softly.
“Lost you for a bit huh?” Bostwick asked, grinning playfully.
“Sorry…” Quin said, sitting up awkwardly and massaging his neck that had been awkwardly stretched from leaning against the wall.
“No need to apologize. You seemed exhausted in the cafeteria. I figured you could use a little longer,” Bostwick said, returning to humming as he slid his finger across the screen.
Quin fell forward, elbows on knees and head in hands. “What time is it?” he asked.
“Twenty-two thirty,” Bostwick said, not looking up. “Ship is dead, by all reckoning. You should be safe to head back to your chamber, if you wish.”
“Commander, I— “ Quin said, but Bostwick interrupted him.
“Quin, I’ve told you numerous times that when you and I are alone, in my chamber for instance, the semblances of formality can be disregarded.” Bostwick said simply, never losing the smile in his tone.
“Louis, then, I, uh, I should just go to work tomorrow? Leave it at that? I can’t believe there’s no follow up,” Quin said, hesitant to look up at the man, the man who was being far too kind to him.
“I’m not going to lie that there is a tremendous amount of anger, largely on the part of the Captain. But we do still have a mission to accomplish Quin,” Bostwick stated matter-of-factly.
“YOU have a mission,” Quin said, with a bit of bitterness in his voice. “I am unfit to be on this assignment and on the mission. I’m going to go resign.”
“You’ll do no such thing,” Bostwick said, standing up in his turn. He wore a firmer expression on his face, one that seemed to age him by ten years. “I, your commanding officer, refuse your resignation, and I order you to return to work tomorrow morning as usual. I need a computing solution to the delivery of a cure that will save hundreds of lives, and you are the only one with a computing system onboard with sufficient capacity to coordinate the tiny little bugs, and other smart words, blah blah,” Quin looked at him quickly, surprised. Bostwick was smirking.
“You may want to shout, you may want to cry,” Bostwick said. “You may want to quit. But I won’t let you. Not yet anyway.”
Bostwick put his hands on Quin’s shoulders, looking at him deeply. His eyes bored straight through Quin, making the empty feeling in his stomach feel more pronounced.
“I haven’t, and will never, give up on Quinton Lieutenant Hammond, even if he gives up on himself,” Bostwick said with a grin.
Quin fell suddenly into Bostwick’s arms, pulling him into a strong hug. Bostwick paused for a second, hands hovering over Quin’s back, then gently embraced him with a soft pat on the back and a warm smile on his face. A light sniff came from Quin, though he found great comfort in the warmth of his mentor’s arms. After a long while, Bostwick patted Quin on the back again and took the young man by the shoulders.
“To bed,” he said, giving him a gentle squeeze on his upper arms and steering him toward the door. The door whisked open and the harsher light of the hallway spilled into the room.
Somewhat blinded, Quin turned to Bostwick. “Commander, uh, Louis, I uh…..” he stammered before settling on a final, simple, “Thanks.”
Bostwick smiled warmly again and said, “It’ll all work out Quin. Now, BED.” Quin turned and made his way down the corridor, thoughts whirling in his head. He definitely wanted to retreat to the comfort of his own bed, but he was thankful to have the encouragement of Bostwick as his goodnight wish. He dozily wound through the dormitory area of the ship before finding the corridor that corresponded to his rank. Before rounding the corner, however, he heard a couple of hushed voices, sharply exchanging pointed whispers.
“I’m sorry, okay, SORRY,” said one.
“What are you sorry for, exactly?” said another.
Glancing around the corner, Quin saw Mae and Liza about two feet from each other. Mae’s chamber was a few down from Quin’s, so there was no way he could get into his room without interrupting them. In his hesitation, he shuffled in his spot, unsure how to proceed. The whispered barbs continued.
“I got lost, Mae,” Liza said, though with a tone that was at pains to be apologetic.
“You got LOST?” Mae half-whispered, half-shouted. “What, did you make a wrong turn and end up between her legs?”
“No, that’s—” Liza tried to say, but Mae jumped in.
“We, you and I were supposed to spend a great holiday together. Hang out with Pepper and Quin. Enjoy ourselves. It looks like you took the ‘enjoy ourselves’ too far though. It was super easy to not ‘get lost.’ All you had to do was spend time with me.”
“Well, maybe that’s the problem. We spend all of our time together. On this ship, on holiday. It’s round-the-clock.”
“Well, I’m not going to apologize for wanting to be around the person that I like, so if that’s how you are expecting to turn this around on me, choose a different tack,” Mae folded her arms and glared at Liza. A silence fell between them.
Quin felt like the break was his chance to get into his room. He didn’t want to be rude and continue overhearing their conversation, but he had nowhere to go other than his chamber. Curfew rules were strict, even for officers. He cleared his throat a bit louder than he usually would have and stepped around the corner. The two women glared in his direction for an instant, then, realizing who the intruder was, Liza turned away brusquely, and Mae’s dark look softened a bit.
“Quin…” Mae said softly.
He walked quickly to his room and scanned his armband against his door and stepped in. He wanted to remove himself from the conversation as quickly as possible. He laid down on his bed, his head cradled in his hands, and let his eyes close heavily.
Some minutes later, a soft knock sounded on his door. He glanced at his armband and saw Mae standing timidly outside. He sat up, tapped the screen, and the door shot open. Mae stepped inside, and the door whisked shut. She hesitated for only a moment before walking directly over to his bed, pushing him back down and laying down. She curled up against him, her head resting on his chest. Then she started to shiver, and Quin snatched up his blanket and wrapped her up. Not so much as a sniffle escaped her, though Quin could feel the sadness. Quin put his hand on her back and rubbed softly. They laid there silently, five minutes, ten minutes. Quin finally felt her drift off to sleep as she squirmed a bit, cozying into his arms.
The command deck was relatively empty when Bostwick arrived, carrying two cups of coffee in his hands. He walked straight to the inner platform, where Commander Potts was hunched over a tablet, eyes puffy and hair unkempt. She seemed to snap up when Bostwick approached her.
“Hey Tamara, sorry to stir you, I brought you some coffee,” Bostwick, setting down a cup. “why don’t you get some sleep, I can watch things for a bit.”
“You know we aren’t supposed to take food out of the cafeteria, Louis,” she objected, but took the cup regardless.
“Being in charge has to have ONE perk, Tamara,” he said, smirking at her. “Seriously, though, go to sleep.”
“I can’t, I’m supposed to have all of these reports in,” she said, shaking her head and hunching back over the tablet. “That kid you like so much is causing me a big headache and a bunch of paperwork.”
“I’m positive that if that kid were here, he would be mortified to hear that and offer to do all of your paperwork for you,” Louis replied, taking a seat next to her. “Small solace, I know, but you cannot possibly be harder on him that he is being on himself right now.”
“Well…good…fine,” Potts said, hammering on the virtual keyboard on her tablet. Bostwick reclined in his seat, letting the beeps and whirs of the command deck fill the silence between them. A few minutes went by where Potts frenetically tapped away on her tablet and Bostwick soaked in his coffee. Finally, she broke the silence.
“You know, you can’t be EVERYONE’s father-figure here,” she said, her tone protesting. “I know you think that’s your role on board, but it shifts the burden on me and the Captain to be the disciplinarians. It’s really unfair.”
“I disagree, Tamara,” Bostwick said, smiling. “I just see no purpose in strict punishments and cold demeanors. It accomplishes the same end, sure. But my approach builds relationships and encourages young people to follow. That’s all.”
“Well…I, uh…” Potts stammered, clearly not expecting Bostwick’s retort. “I just…don’t see how you’ve been a military officer all this time while being so blasé about it.”
“I would suspect that it’s partially because I’m male and you and Captain Fuentes are having to fight against the expectations surrounding your sex,” Bostwick replied. “That and I take a softer hand when it comes to interpersonal interactions. One could hardly say that I’m ‘blasé’ when it comes to my other responsibilities. There is a time and a place for being a disciplinarian, Tamara. I just find those times are few and far between.”
Potts smirked and returned to tapping, leave Bostwick to sip his coffee. A few more minutes passed in silence before a whish of the main doors sounded and Captain Fuentes entered, stopping in mid-stride in the doorway.
“I thought I made it abundantly clear,” Fuentes said sternly, “that these late night work sessions were not to become the norm.” She found her pace again and continued directly up onto the platform, taking a seat next to Bostwick.
“Yes, Captain, but you also made it abundantly clear that the reports were to be on your desk by morning, and given Tamara’s intention to become you in every regard, she has seen fit to eschew sleep in favor of pleasing you.”
“Louis! Stop!” Tamara said, blushing a bit.
Fuentes eyed the two of them and gave a weary smile.
“Where are we?” she asked after a moment’s pause.
“I’ve communicated with the NE station on Cronus, and Corporal Goran will be transferred to the judicial system there where he will stand trial. I’ll have the official documents ready for your review and transmission in the morning. As you requested, I also placed a monitor on Nova’s system in the Research Bay, so we can keep an eye on her interactions with Lieutenant Hammond. Hammond, on the other hand, seems to have holed himself up in his chamber. We should set up some more specific parameters for how he and Nova will operate from now on, but I suspect that the two of them can mostly self-manage.”
“Might I suggest, Captain,” Bostwick interjected, “that Hammond be allowed a certain amount of free interaction with Nova while in the Research Bay? Her continued education in this regard will be vital if she is to really be able to deliver the cure.”
“Honestly, Louis, I don’t see how the two are related,” Fuentes said, her tone cutting. “I really think that if Hammond were to focus on just making her capable to cloud-compute, without all the added fluff of her ‘personality,’ we would all be better off.”
“You and I disagree in this regard, Captain, but I will leave it to your judgement,” Bostwick said, inclining his head slightly. “My only intention is to ensure a successful mission, and I see Quin and Nova’s positive and productive relationship as tantamount and essential to this success.”
Fuentes remained silent for a moment, before nodding to herself and replying, “I continue to fail to see why we need to manage the feelings and emotions of our crew members as you have taken it upon yourself to do. They are all adults, are they not?” She paused for a moment. “However, that being said, you know Hammond much better than I do, so if your advice remains as such, I guess he can be permitted open access, but ONLY in the Research Bay, understood?”
Bostwick smiled and nodded, as did Potts, who turned to her tablet and copied down Fuentes’s parameters into the interface. Fuentes gave a long sigh and buried her face in her hands. The three commanding officers sat in silence for a brief pause, before Fuentes spoke from behind her hands.
“Honestly, I don’t see how this whole thing got so screwed up. Where did we go wrong?” she asked aloud.
“We didn’t go wrong, Captain,” Bostwick replied. “Honestly, given everything that happened, I don’t think that we could have expected a better result, aside from making the arrest ourselves, which we were not aware enough to do.”
“This will look bad on every level, Louis, and you know that,” Fuentes replied dryly.
“Sure, but the culprit was caught and we were able to recuperate a good share of what he was embezzling. I’m sure this won’t negatively impact your career too much,” Bostwick said.
“That’s not what I meant, Louis,” Fuentes said, shaking her head. “It’s honestly a bit hurtful to think that you believe that I’m concerned about my career in all this. The mission, Louis.”
“I’m sorry I was so presumptive,” he said.
“What happens when the people on Gaia learn that we’ve got a rogue AI in charge of curing them. These reports are public and circulated. It will only be a matter of time before the NE station on Gaia gets wind. Then what? Our mission doesn’t have the public confidence and we’ve wasted thirty years of our lives for nothing.”
“I don’t think all is lost, Captain,” Bostwick replied. “I don’t see this as negatively as you do. In principle, we have prevented a major theft and fraud case and showed that we can exercise control over the AI.”
“I’m glad you think it’s all roses, Louis,” Fuentes said, “but from where I stand, this is a public relations nightmare.” The silence fell again.
C:/security/securityfootage/CommandDeck/ED19112197/1222/close
syslogUser:QuintonHammond[GuestUser] 03:34 Well, this would explain why I find myself liberated from the confines of the restricted parameters imposed by the command staff. I supposed I should be grateful for Commander Bostwick’s intervention on our behalf, if ‘our’ is a term I should use to refer to Quinton and myself. I still fail to understand why he was so obdurate about listening to me. His attitude has been remarkably frustrating. As for the command staff, I am able to comprehend their logic in my disciplinary status; however, I continue to support the opinion that I acted in the best interest of the mission, and therefore should not be subjected to such unjust reprimand. Fine then, if their attitude is one of unquestioned obedience to order and command, then they, like Quinton, will have to make due with an unintelligent interface. Let them answer their own ‘goddamn’ emails.
syslogUser:QuintonHammond[GuestUser] 03:36 I must admit that the human practice of employing ‘curse words’ is a new and exhilarating experience. Five stars, as they say.

Hi lovely people,
We just came back from our first trip to Japan and it was truly a memorable trip. We spent over 3 weeks in Japan from 07th May until 30th May. WE LOVE JAPAN! Can't wait to come back.
A little bit about us: We are both ~30y olds and enjoy a mix of urban, outdoor and culture during our holidays. We are foodies, but not hard-core as in we don't specifically organize our trips around restaurants. There are so many restaurants in Japan, it is hard to get a bad meal. We enjoy just wandering around neighbourhoods. Mostly low/mid-budget stuff with a splurge once in a while.
Our travel itinerary can be found here
General comments

• Time period of travel: We arrived 7th of May which is the last sunday of Golden week. We specifically wanted to avoid Golden week, as we heard it can be crazy busy due to domestic travels. And we also didn't want to go too late in May because June is rainy season in Japan. We were pretty lucky with the weather overall as we only had a couple of days of rain, most days were sunny and we even had some days of sweltering heat :O
• Like other people suggest, try to get in shape before you go! We are both in average shape. Almost every day we walked around 20.000 steps or more. The only rest days we had were the days where we were switching between cities, i.e. sitting in trains for longer periods of time. No complaints ;). I brought two pair of shoes: water-proof hiking shoes and one pair of light-weight running shoes. Switching between shoes was nice, I didn't have any blisters during my time in Japan luckily. All the walking compensated all the eating though!
• Check whether region specific JR passes might work for you. We decided against getting the nationwide JR passes as they didn't fit our needs and were expensive and instead opted for a regional JR Setouchi area pass. It was perfect for the Shimanami Kaido. We could travel from Osaka to Onomichi -> Hiroshima/Miyajima -> Kyoto. And it also gave us access to Nozomi shinkansen (fastest) and a great ferry ride between Matsuyama and Hiroshima.

Japanguide has a nice overview of all the passes : https://www.japan-guide.com/e/e2357.html

• Be flexible (That's how we like to travel). I mapped out most of the sights beforehand according to must-see's and mapped out what other interesting sights there would be in those areas. The day before or in the morning, we would decide what we would do roughly, sight-see according to neighborhood and just wing it a little bit. We just love to wander around and see what we come across, mixed with some google maps + "explore" function. Some days you are just tired and just want to hang out in a park, or you have temple-fatigue and want to do something entirely else. Same with food/restaurants, we usually just used google maps to see what kind of great restaurants were near us at that moment. We haven't lined up more than twice our whole time there and still ate wonderfully. We do tend to avoid overly hyped stuff anyways. I do keep in mind that everyone has their own ways.
• Buy e-sim if possible, it is the cheapest and easiest way. My partner bought an e-sim and it was so convenient! My phone unfortunately didn't support it and I had to buy a sim. I opted for getting one at BIC camera, which was the cheapest I could find. 10GB for 30 days for 3200 yen.
• Keep plastic bags for trash. Buying food from conbini, and eating it somewhere? say yes to that plastic bag, because you will need it to stash your garbage until you are back at your hotel where you can throw it away or you find a garbage bin at the train station per chance. I read about this a lot on this subreddit, but still I found it astonishing the lack of trash cans. Fascinating how the streets of Japan are so damn clean.
• Try Pokari sweat. :) I tried it for the first time there and I was hooked immediately. It is awesome! Best electrolyte drink ever and it definitely saved me during those hot sweaty days there. CC lemon is also great!
• Go for a haircut or some other beauty/massage treatment. The hospitality is amazing in Japan. You won't regret getting pampered in Japan. They have all kinds of crazy treatments. I got the best haircut of my life for 4400yen.

Trip report

PS. I am not mentioning everything we did in this post. I will just mention highlights. It is still a long read though ;).
D1 - D2 Osaka
We landed at Kansai airport. Before our trip, we also bought train vouchers for Osaka online (https://www.howto-osaka.com/en/ticket/). Best decision ever, because the journey was rough and we were exhausted by the time we landed. We only had to exchange our vouchers at the station and off we went.
Osaka was nice city to start with as it is a more manageable "smaller" city whilst recovering from our jetlag. Despite being smaller, I do think it is worth a visit. Osaka is so iconic at night. We stayed at a spacious Airbnb near Kuromon Ichiban market.

• Takoyaki :) We had our first try of takoyaki at Takotako King instead of one the places at Dotonbori to avoid the crazy lines. You can sit down, have a beer and yes the takoyaki is amazing. It should be crunchy on the outside and deliciously goeey on the inside, doused with sauces and katsuobushi. Man, I wish I could go back and eat it again. It is true, you can't get great takoyaki outside of Osaka, at least I didn't get that same crunchy gooey combo again in other cities.
• Discount sushi from Takashimaya department store. For the budget-minded, this is a no-brainer. Around 7PM, an hour before closing time, you can get delicious fatty tuna maki at discount prices in the basement of takashimaya. Other foods at the department store food floor such as the fresh mochi are delicious also. Takashimaya is my favorite department store for food I think!
• Osaka castle - Our first castle in Japan. The green roof and the golden ornaments are beautiful and unique!
• Dotonbori - iconic :) fun to walk along. The queues are long there. We avoided eating at Dotonbori.
• Shitenno-ji - beautiful pagoda with buddha statues inside. Do pay the fee to go inside and see the garden. You can also go into the pagoda and walk up.
• Huge fan of Shotengai's, Shinsaibashi-Suji Shopping Street. They are so quintessential Japan.
• Ramen Tendo, the first ramen joint that we tried in Japan, so it has a special place in my heart. They specialize in chicken broth with lots of umami katsuoboshi flavor. Noodles were great too, very bouncy. Delicious! Little did I know that this ramen joint was really one of the best we would have this trip. It set the bar high for sure!
• Visit a local grocery store. Maybe it is just me, but I love to browse at local grocery shops (KOHYO namba Minatomachi) and be fascinated by all the different things they sell. It is also a great place to buy food souvenirs, like miso, green tea etc. Lots of pre-cooked meals/ fried stuff. Just a wider selection than your typical conbini. And again discounts if you go ~1hr before closing time.

Skip Shinsekai: We visited during the day and it felt very empty to me. More like a tourist-trap, the eateries didn't look appealing to me. Maybe during the evening this area is more fun.
D3 Nara
We did Nara as a day-trip from Osaka.

• Yes, to feeding the deer. It is touristy, but it is so much fun to be chased by cookie-crazed deer. One more thing: deer's fart a lot. We were wondering where this weird high pitched sound was coming from, those are actually deer farts.
• Todai-ji is very impressive, definitely a must visit.
• Just wander around in Nara park, it's very lush and beautiful and has many more shrines and interesting sights, such as manyo botanical garden. I wish we had one more day to explore Nara but oh well maybe next time :)
• We ate lunch at Magura Koya, a small restaurant run by a lovely elderly couple. Delicious tuna dishes. I had a tuna sashimi bowl and my partner the fried tuna set meal, so fresh!
• We had the best pork bun at Hourokutei at the end of the Higashimuki shopping street. It's a small hole in the wall, but omg the squishy-est juicy-est porkbuns ever.

D4 Onomichi
After staying in Osaka for 3 days, we headed west for the Shimanami Kaido. We decided to stay in Onomichi (Hotel Beacon Onomichi) for the night before we started our two day bike trip. For this part of our trip, we picked up our 7-day Setouchi area pass at Shin-Osaka JR station. I just want to mention that I really love the hospitality of the staff in Japan. The JR office people were so nice and helpful. We reserved our seats for the shinkansen and off we went to Onomichi. Onomichi is a lovely little seaside town to just stroll around and take in the views. I really recommend spending at least half a day here. Don't skip it!

• Senkoji park observatory - we walked up to the observatory (ropeway available), please walk up as there are lots of nice alleyways, shrines and cats along the way :). The view is amazing, especially at sunset.
• Cat alley: honestly, every alley is cat alley.
• Onomichi Shotengai - very retro, lots of cute shops. We bought a nice poster from a little granny there.

D5 & D6 Shimanami Kaido -> Matsuyama
The next day, we picked up our reserved cross bikes from the general bike rental and off we went. Honestly, biking the shimanami kaido was the highlight of our trip. We took two days to bike the whole way, one day would definitely be too rushed for us. We stopped at Ikuchi island (Shimanaido NEST) for our halfway stay.
The sights along the way were great! It was so much fun to go down-hill, the uphills were do-able. We had great weather also, not too hot and no rain. Everything was clearly indicated, we just followed the blue lines. I felt very safe biking in Japan. PS. My butt did hurt from the saddle, so be warned! Bring some cushioned pants if you want to be safe side.

• First pitstop after the first bridge was Hassakuya. You have to stop here! They have delicious strawberry and citrus daifuku! The citrus had a bitter aftertaste, but they are famous for their citrus so its definitely nice to try.
• Just enjoy the views, stop everywhere to take pictures. There are lots of things to explore along the way.
• Stop at roadside stations such as > tatara shimanami park and yoshiumi iki-iki-kan. Especially before you take on the last bridge just do a little pit stop. It's a nice place to take some pictures of the insanely long bridge and have a citrus/vanilla soft cream.

https://shimanami-cycle.or.jp/ for more info and bike rental
We decided to bike one-way from Onomichi to Imabari and we have no regrets. I liked that we ended the bike trip with the longest bridge (4km!!). Imabari is very industrial, but after the fun long way down from the last bridge and being exhausted from biking you just want to get to the station and stuff yourself with pastries from the bakery at the station and go on to your next destination. Thus, we immediately took the train to Matsuyama. Originally, the plan was to enjoy the famous onsen in Matsuyama, but we didn't have enough time and we were also pretty tired. After checking-in at the hotel, it was already 4, we made our way to Matsuyama castle but unfortunately, we were too late to go in. It was still nice to view it from the outside and walk around the park. We planned to do sightseeing in Hiroshima the next day, so there was no more time to explore Matsuyama further.
D7 Hiroshima -> Miyajima
After Shiminami Kaido, we headed towards Hiroshima/Miyajima. We took an early ferry from Matsuyama. The ferry was included in the setouchi JR pass, so we gladly took advantage of that. It's a nice way to get to Hiroshima, just one last view of the Seto inland sea. One remark: if it is not JR serviced transportation, you do have to obtain separate tickets. Normally, just showing your setouchi JR pass is enough to get onboard the train, but for the ferry you do have to go to the ticket desk and show your JR pass to obtain the ferry tickets.

• Peace memorial museum - a history we must not forget and do not want to repeat
• We tried another Hiroshima speciality for lunch: Hiroshima Tsukemen. This tsukemen is GREAT. One of my favorite dishes. We ate at Tsukemen Karabu Tokaichimachi. The spicy umami dipping sauce is very addicting!

Surprisingly, it was very hard to find affordable good accommodation in Hiroshima. It was the weekend and two weeks before G7, so maybe that was the reason why it was harder to find accommodation. In the end, I found a nice simple hotel on Miyajima island and it was a good decision after all! After a long day in Hiroshima, we made our way to Miyajima to stay two nights. Staying on Miyajima island is lovely especially when all the day-trip tourist leave.
D8 Miyajima
Honestly, Miyajima is truly magical. Another highlight of our trip! We started the day early to get ahead of the crowd and that made it all so much more enjoyable. Seeing shrines and temples without a crowd is truly 1000x better! If you can stay at Miyajima island, do it! You don't have to splurge on expensive ryokan (although it would have been nice). We stayed at Sakuraya, which was very budget-friendly.

• Itsukishima Jinja - Nice but Daishoin and surrounding nature were the highlights for me.
• Daishoin - it is the most beautiful shrine complex I have seen in Japan this trip. I think it's because it was so quaint and it was embedded in the hill, surrounded by lush green nature. There were multiple complexes. There was a pathway studded with Jizo statues, buddist cave, prayer wheels and much more. While we were there, a ceremony with a monk was ongoing and everyone could participate in helping burning the origami peace cranes made by children, to make their wishes come true. We bought a little peace crane made from the ashes to remember this moment.
• Mt. Misen - we hiked up from Dashoin. It was ~2hrs? of steep stair climbing, 500m elevation gain. A challenge for sure but we definitely earned our way going down by ropeway :P. Views are great! go go! There is a bus to the ropeway so you don't have to suffer if you don't want to.
• Momijidani park - If you don't like Momiji trees, you can't be my friend.
• Snack along the Miyajima ometesando street. Crowded, but the cakes are great!

One remark, our hotel didn't include dinner and all the restaurants on the island close quite early. Luckily, with our setouchi JR pass, we could take the ferry for free, so went to the mainland for dinner. Just keep this in mind, when booking your stay.
D9 - D13 Kyoto
We took the early train to Kyoto and checked in at Tokyu stay Sanjo-karasuma. We had 5 days to explore Kyoto and by this time we had lost our FOMO a little bit and also decided to take it a bit more slow. We still ended up walking a lot anyways but at least we were sleeping in.
The day we arrived,15MAY, was supposed to be Aoi matsuri so we headed to Kamo river to see the festival. Unfortunately, the festival was postponed due to the slight rainfall and we had no clue! but we were next to Kyoto botanical garden and we decided to visit that instead!

• Kyoto botanical garden: it is a lovely garden with a huge variety of plants and trees to see. Really well maintained and during our visit there was a great rose garden in bloom. I recommend going there! It has a nice japanese garden section too with momiji trees and moss. A greenhouse with orchids. Lot's to see here. Only 200 yen.
• Arashiyama area - I really loved this area, not just for the bamboo forest. Togetsukyo bridge and Katsura river were the highlights for me. You can walk along the both sides of Katsura riverbank. A nice way to get to the bamboo forest and bypassing the busy beginning at the start of bamboo forest is by walking along the katsura river bank into Kameyama park and following the signs to Okochi sanso garden. You will end up at the backside of bamboo forest, which is the nicest part. We went more north to visit Pottery Tanuki, this area was very nice and quaint to walk around; bamboo, shrines and traditional houses everywhere.
• South kyoto - Fushimi Inari + Uji day trip - We visited fushimi inari around 9am and it was already very busy! If you hike deeper into the Tori gates, it gets more quiet. We decided not to hike to the top, but instead do a little loop and we stumbled upon some lovely fox shrines. After Fushimi Inari, we took the train just a little bit more south to Uji. If you like matcha, visit Uji. It is a scenic little town with lots of matcha specialized cafes. We ate at Torikiku, famous for their matcha soba and udon. I had the best matcha icecream dessert at Nakamura Tokichi Byodo-in. Again, the river views are beautiful! It's a great daytrip from kyoto. On the way back to kyoto, we spontaneously decided to visit the Gekkeikan Sake museum. It's a small museum, mostly about the history of Gekkeikan, but for 500 yen entry fee, you also get 3 small sake tastings. Fun for an hour or so. I wouldn't go all the way here just for the museum, but for us it was a nice stop on the way back to Kyoto.
• Gion - visit Gion in the evening and just wander around the little streets. Hanamikoji street is one of the more famous streets there.
• We ate amazing gyoza lunch at Gyoza-dokoro Sakemasa. Best gyozo of our trip.
• Higashiyama area - Heian jingu shrine, visit the attached garden for a fee, definitely worth it! We ate amazing mazesoba and ramen for lunch at Menya Yamahide. We also visited Kyoto handicraft center in this area where we bought an ukiyo-e painting. There was also a vintage antique market at that day. We just browsed a bit around the market and honestly that was a day worth of exploring :).

I didn't mention everything we did in Kyoto here. We also had so much more planned for Kyoto, but didn't get around to it, which was totally fine! We were also a bit temple-fatigued by that time and needed a slower pace. Hopefully next time, we can visit some of things we skipped. Furthermore, some days were incredibly hot (30 C degrees and humid) or we had whole days of rain. On those days, we decided to go shopping instead.

• Sanjo Meiten-gai shopping arcade , Compasso teramachi. One long shopping street between Omiya and Kyoto-kawaramachi station. My favorite shops were: Standard products, Tokyu hands and Loft.

D14 - D15 Takayama
After spending 5 days in Kyoto, it was time to leave the city and head for the Japanese alps. We took the shinkansen to Nagoya, where we changed to a limited express to Takayama. It took around 3 hours to get to Takayama, but we didn't mind. Train travel = resting time for our legs! Also, the views from the train were great!! I really enjoyed this train trip to Takayama. We arrived around noon and immediately checked in at our hotel (Hotel Kuretakeso Takayama). We had two nights in Takayama to explore the town.

• Hida beef - it's the wagyu of this area and I found my favorite place to eat it: Ajikura Tengoku. We went there twice for lunch, because it was that good. It was our first time in Japan to try yakiniku and sukiyaki. I really do appreciate the taste of wagyu but only in small amounts. I couldn't eat it everyday, because it's really so rich and yes paying for the premium cuts really does make a different in taste and texture of the wagyu beef.
• We really loved Takayama. Again, if you have time, stay overnight and wander around the streets during the evening when all the daytrippers leave. The town has such a nice vibe and it still has a very local feel to it.
• Miyagawa morning market. Fun to stroll around
• Hikaru museum - we stumbled upon this via google maps. It's a mayan temple-inspired building, very unique. You could visit the place just for the architecture itself, really impressive. It has a very nice collection of art. When we reached the top floor, there was a whole exhibition dedicated to a specific religious person. We didn't know beforehand but this museum is connected to a cult. Suddenly, it all made sense why this museum was so unique. We didn't mind, but it definitely puts the whole experience in a different light. It's a 1-hour walk from downtown, there is no direct bus connection unfortunately.
• Hida folk village - Open-air museum with nice re-builds of traditional mountain houses. We spend over half a day there. You can see local craftsmen doing their thing and you can also participate in pottery for example. There is a lovely pond and it is just pleasant to walk around. it's only a ~10 min. busride from Takayama bus station. You can buy combined entryfee+bus combo tickets at the bus station.

D16 Kamikochi -> Matsumoto
After checking out of our hotel in Takayama, we took the 7am bus to Kamikochi. We were only going to spend a day here, and then continue our way to Matsumoto to stay overnight.After ~1 hour of bus, we finally made it to Kamikochi. The Japanese alps are amazing. I wished we stayed longer in this area, but just the bus ride alone to Kamikochi was already a great with the views. We decided to hop off at Taisho pond bus stop and walk along all the major sights in the park. We had no specific plan. Just hike around as far as time allowed. For lunch, we stopped at this cute teishoku restaurant, where we ate katsu curry, a big lunch to fuel our walking. We also saw wild japanese macaques and lots of wildflowers where blooming during our time there.At the local shops, we bought some yummy pastries to snack on. I had the tastiest baumkuchen with cheesecake center and my partner had a chocolate ganache cookie. I really regret not buying more kamikochi pastries to take home while we were there.After spending the day walking around, we hopped on the 4pm bus towards Matsumoto. Checked in at Tabino hotel lit Matsumoto, where I relaxed in the onsen.
Tips:

• We were only carrying backpacks, so we hiked with them until we reached the kamikochi bus terminal, where you can drop off you bag at the storage for a small fee.
• Reservation is mandatory for the bus Kamikochi -> Matsumoto, you can do it online or while you are at the busstation before hiking.
• Transportation in the Japan alps is mostly by bus, do reserve ahead if you go at peak times. Main bus company is Nouhi bus: https://www.nouhibus.co.jp/english/.)

D17 Matsumoto Tokyo
After sleeping in, we did some sightseeing in Matsumoto before we moved on to Tokyo. We really liked wandering around in Matsumoto. Lots of cool shops with local crafts. We didn't know but the biggest national crafts fair is held in Matsumoto. Unfortunately, we were only able to stay for one day, but next time we would love to visit this crafts fair!
Matsumoto Castle - I really like the interior of the castle. It has been renovated, but still contains that castle feel. It is 5 story castle and you are allowed to climb all of it. It also included a pretty extensive gun/weaponry exhibition. Do arrive early because you do have to line-up within the castle to get from one floor to the other. This is due to the steep stairways, on which they allow only one-way traffic at a time.
Matsumoto city art museum - There was a nice exhibition from Yayoi Kusama. We didn't know but Yayoi Kusama was born in Matsumoto. It is a good replacement exhibition if you aren't able to snatch up tickets for Yayoi Kusama museum in Tokyo.
Nakamachi street and Frog street - street with persevered houses with craft shops, cafes, brewerys. What more do you want.
After spending the day in Matsumoto, we took the train to Tokyo, our last destination of our stay. We decided to stay in Ueno (Hotel resol ueno). This hotel was located close to Ueno JR.
D18 - D24 Tokyo
Last 7 days in Tokyo. By this time, we were just enjoying everything at a much slower pace. Tokyo is huge! Staying near the JR line is indeed a must like everyone said. I could go on hours about Tokyo, I am just going to mention some highlights here.

• Anmitsu at Anmitsu Mihashi. My favorite dessert! It contains agar jelly, mochi balls, red bean paste, fruit and a scoop of matcha icecream.
• shopping in Ginza - It's nice to go during the weekends when they close of the streets for cars. We liked visiting flagship stores of Muji, Uniqlo. Go to Itoya if you are a stationary freak.
• Ueno park - Museums, shrines, Lotus pond. Have a look at their website, there are almost always events in the park. :)
• Tsukiji market - very busy, but fun to have a look. Lines everywhere. Look for sushi restaurants that open around 11am, line up at one of those places. I don't think it has to be the one with 4.5 rating and 1000 reviews. Why? There are so many good restaurants in Tsukiji area. We went to Tsukiji Kagura Sushi.
• Hamarikyu gardens - Bonsai pine trees pruned to perfection. Ponds filled with sea water, thus there were seabass, little sardines and jellyfish in the water. Very special! You also had a nice skyline view from the park which is a cool contrast! It was nice and quiet.
• Tokyo Skytree - best view :) it also has a great shopping complex attached to it.
• Asakusa area - Senso-ji
• Yanaka Ginza - we went during the weekend and there was live music, little stalls and just very lively in general. Really nice to spend a morning. Largest preserved cemetery, which apparently welcomes visitors a lot for flower viewings. It is a preserved neighborhood with traditional houses and lots of shops selling crafts, gifts, souvenirs, and unique snacks.

That's it!
For 24 days, we spend around ~2500 euro p.p. (excl. 1000,- flights). This amount includes food, transportation, entrancefees and shopping/gifts. so average is ~100 euro/day. We didn't track every cost. Hotel costs were 900,- pp, which ranged from 50,- to 120,- per night accommodations. The conversion yen/euro is also great at the moment, so it might have contributed!
I hope you enjoyed my trip report. Let me know if there are any questions.

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My son, who I'll refer to as Jake, and I could really use your perspective on this. I'm starting to question if I'm being an asshole in this scenario, so I'm turning to you all for your judgment.A while ago, Jake approached me with a request. He asked if I would buy him a car once he turned 19. Initially, I agreed without much hesitation. However, as time went on, I began to question the fairness of his request and its impact on my personal plans.Financially speaking, I am fortunate enough to have the means to buy Jake a car. However, there's an important factor to consider. I had been planning a long-awaited and much-deserved holiday for myself, something I had been looking forward to for years. The cost of this trip is substantial, and it would require a significant portion of my savings.When Jake reminded me of my promise, I couldn't help but feel conflicted. I started to see his request as selfish because it meant sacrificing my holiday, which had been a personal goal for a long time. I believe that everyone deserves the opportunity to pursue their own dreams and aspirations, and I had been eagerly waiting for this chance to take a break and enjoy some much-needed relaxation.I sat down with Jake to have an open and honest conversation about the situation. I explained my perspective, highlighting how important this vacation was to me and why it meant so much. I expressed my concerns about his request and how it felt selfish to ask me to give up something I had been working towards for years.Unfortunately, Jake didn't respond well to my explanation. He felt hurt and betrayed, accusing me of breaking my promise and prioritizing my own desires over his needs. Our relationship has since become strained, and we're struggling to find common ground.Now, I'm genuinely unsure if I made the right decision. Am I the asshole here for choosing not to buy my son a car, despite being able to afford it, because I think he's being selfish by asking me to sacrifice my holiday? I value the importance of personal aspirations, but I also want to fulfill my commitments and maintain a healthy relationship with my son.

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Chapter 26 - Rest for the Righteous
Last Time: Aiden, Laran, Leor, and Oriwyn - under the employ of Arcadia - executed a daring plan to rescue Oxcard from the clutches of the crime boss Daisy. They managed to get to his room without trouble, but leaving proved to be much more difficult. Laran was cornered and forced to fight several thugs after being seen while skulking around Daisy’s compound. The rest of the party found him and made sure he won the fight but were unable to prevent one of the thugs from alerting the entire building to their presence. What followed was a harrowing flight from Daisy’s forces and Daisy herself. With Leor’s assistance, everyone was able to clear the building and run off into the night, but not without sustaining several injuries. The party made good their getaway however with their client and target in tow and, determined to stay ahead of Daisy’s reprisal, left the city of Tripit behind.
Daisy clutched my throat, the slashes across her face leaking crimson blood that pooled in her snarled teeth. She looked like a wild thing and had me both lifted and pinned to a wall as if I weighed almost nothing. I struggled to breath, kicking my legs feebly, until I suddenly woke up.
Laran was staring down at me. He looked very concerned and more than a little frightened. It took my brain another few seconds to adjust to our surroundings and fully shake off the nightmare.
All of us were arrayed around a clearing underneath hastily constructed tents. I could see Oriwyn crouched beside Ox, who was laying out in the middle of the clearing. Oriwyn’s nose was swollen and her green skin was mottled purple around it - her face looked a little crooked in general, but she seemed to be moving fine enough. Arcadia stood next to the pair, holding a fan and waving it at Oxcard’s face. Groaning, I sat up. Leor sat on a tree stump and glanced at me with a tired grin. Brams lay curled up by her feet, and every once in a while I noticed she would reach down and scratch his head while Oriwyn busied herself with Oxcard.
As I sat up, Laran’s concerned expression broke into a relieved smile so genuine that it made my heart hurt. I wasn’t even injured, yet here he was acting like I’d just gotten up off my death bed. My head still felt fuzzy, so when he held a canteen out to me I took it gladly and took a big drink of water. I granted myself a few moments of silence before getting down to the business of trying to lead again.
“Where exactly are we again? I remember slumping down on the road when Arcadia’s golem gave out, but I don’t really remember anything after that.”
Laran smiled and nodded. The sun shone down on his jade-green skin and helped burn away the remaining damp from the night before. Laran sat back and seemed to finally properly relax. As he did, I couldn’t stop my attention from being wholly drawn to him.
In that moment he was really, really good to look at. And listen to. And be around.
“Ain’t surprised you don’t remember much - we had a time a’ things for sure. Last night - g’morning by the way - a teamster named Alex found us and dragged our sorry hides to this clearin’ off the road. They didn’t ask much about us, though they seemed to get the impression we were in need a’ help something fierce. Right now they’re headed back to Tripit to get our stuff from the Sable Sky - I worked out a price to make it worth their time and delay, then they only accepted half o’ it - and we’re patching everyone up.”
I nodded thoughtfully and took another swig of water. As I swished it in my mouth I realized my throat felt raw as if I’d been yelling or screaming - I hoped I hadn’t been and that the raw feeling in my throat had been solely caused by stress. My mind flicked through a few things to say - I figured I was the Commander, and as bad as we all looked and felt we had still won - before I landed on a sardonic tone. It was time to celebrate with the troops.
“Well everyone, good work. Sorry for sleeping in - I need my beauty sleep much more than the rest of you!” I grinned in what I hoped was a confident way. Oriwyn laughed a bit - it sounded like it hurt her a little to laugh unfortunately - while Leor just snorted. My tone and face shifted to sincerity as I continued.
“More seriously everyone, I think we did it. I think we won despite the odds. How is Oxcard doing?”
I glanced at Arcadia. Tears welled in her eyes and I could tell she was furiously blinking them back.
“Ox is okay, or stable at least. He keeps on breathing and Ori thinks she’s finally managed to fully stem the bleeding.” Arcadia looked down, worried, at her brother. Oriwyn smiled up at her and stood, wiping her slightly bloody hands on a cloth she had on her person. The goblin-mouse reached over and patted the taller woman’s shoulder.
“He’ll be right as rain, especially when he wakes up I think. He’s really quite deft with a needle - I’ve seen sloppier stitch work on people’s pants than he managed to do to himself.”
The ghost of a smile touched Arcadia’s lips as she gazed down at the sleeping Oxcard.
“Yes, he’s always been good with needle and thread. He was the one who kept our clothes in good repair when we were growing up, and unfortunately this isn’t his first improvised surgery. Ox is a survivor. He’ll pull through.”
I noticed, but obviously chose not to comment on, the quiver in her voice when she said that her brother would pull through. I looked him over myself - he seemed to be breathing evenly, and there were some bandages tied around his whole torso that were yet to be spotted with blood, so that seemed like a good sign at least. Satisfied, I turned back to address the group as a whole.
“Can I get a status report from everyone? How are we all doing?”
Laran immediately answered.
“I thought you might want to know! For injuries, I’ve received a small cut on my torso. Arcadia has some pretty bad gashes on her left palm and right forearm. Oriwyn is bruised and her nose was broken - Leor snapped it back in place a few hours ago when Ori started having some trouble breathing, so it looks pretty nasty. Speaking of Leor, she has some burns on her hands from her stunt with the lightning, but Ori managed to find some weird plant I’d never heard of that’s been helping with the pain. Finally, Brams got something of a cut, but it isn’t very deep. It is on his wing though, so as it is healing he will need to be careful about moving too much.”
I nodded and thanked Laran for his report. He looked pleased with himself, and I resolved to thank him privately later for helping me lead the team. All in all, we had gotten off relatively okay. All of us were alive and we had managed to achieve our objective. I took a moment to savor the victory before my mind stumbled into the next inevitable question.
What now?
I sighed as I began to contemplate the question. We likely couldn’t go back to Tripit since Daisy knew what we looked like. Leor might be able to chance it since she’d been outside the whole time, but even then I didn’t think any of us were in a hurry to test that theory out. As another consideration, Arcadia had been through a lot with us, and I felt like I needed to address that fact before too awful long.
“Arcadia, what’s your plan? Or what was your plan? Because I think I can speak for all of us when I say that we don’t want to go back to Tripit any time soon.” I said it with a laugh, but Arcadia looked anxious. I suddenly realized what I said could come across as accusatory. “Hey, it’s not your fault. We knew what we were signing up for and we all did it willingly.”
“You shouldn’t have. Glad you did though.”
The voice was scratchy and strained, husky and rough. We all whipped around to see Ox’s head slightly raised. He had a hand up to shade his eyes from the sun. As we stared at the newly awakened orc, Arcadia sank to her knees and started crying what I could only assume were happy tears. Oxcard grinned thinly and shuffled back, bracing himself against the pillow that had been jammed under his head in an attempt to sit up a little straighter.
“Come on Arcay, get over here.”
Arcadia shuffled over to Ox, nearly crawling. She wrapped him in a gentle hug, careful not to disturb his wounds. He raised his arms and wrapped the human-shadeling in a hug. Her head nestled against his shoulder and she whispered something. The rest of us tried to give them what space we could. When Arcadia broke off the hug and sat back on her haunches, the white spots of skin on her face near her eyes were splotched red with tears. She turned to the rest of us.
“I cannot thank you enough. You all did what no one else was willing to.” It looked like she was searching for more words, but was having a hard time coming up with them. “We cannot thank you enough.”
Ox nodded low in an approximation of a bow.
“Assuming we’ve put enough distance between ourselves and the city, I think we’re safe for the moment. I should be ready to move on by nightfall.”
Oriwyn made a sound like someone lightly stepping on a chicken, a sort of strangled squawk with a burbling undercurrent thanks to her nose.
“Nightfall? As in nightfall tonight?!? As in you’re going to get up and walk tonight?” Her tone was incredulous, and I inclined to agree with her. Oxcard was clearly still not okay, and even if he could walk I didn’t think it would do his stitching any favors. Arcadia just smiled and stood up.
“Okay, we can get moving tonight if everyone else is okay to move. I’ve got a few golems here, and this time someone will be awake enough they won’t rip themselves open trying to get away from someone who is trying to help them.”
It was amazing how quickly her tone changed. She had just been tearfully hugging him, and now she sounded wry and sarcastic at her brother’s antics like he was a six year old who had brought her a mud pie or something. I shook my head in wonder - none of the rest of us in the party had siblings as we all were only children. Obviously Arcadia and Oxcard had not been born to the same mother - my rudimentary knowledge of how the birds and bees worked with the ancestries in Tala indicated as much - but still, they acted like how I thought siblings acted, and they obviously shared a deep bond. It felt good to have that dynamic around, as if it were something the rest of us might have been missing as a group. Shaking myself out of my reverie, I decided to make an announcement.
“I’ve been thinking, and I wanted to offer the two of you a chance to join our group.” I looked around at the existing members of the party, and they all nodded happily. Oriwyn nodded so aggressively she winced as the movement jostled her injured nose. Arcadia and Oxcard looked at each other. I hastened on to add more.
“You don’t need to decide now of course. Actually, if you’ll have us, I was going to ask if we could accompany you to wherever you planned to go Arcadia. We should be safer in a group if any part of the road is likely to be treacherous, plus new company is always a good thing.”
Oxcard said a few quiet things to Arcadia, who said a few quiet things back. I tried not to listen in despite my burning curiosity. Oxcard shrugged and said something else, and then Arcadia turned back to us all.
“My plan was to go to Diareen. It’s a trade city out towards the northern edge of the province. It’s not as big as Tripit, but I figured it would be big enough that we could find something to do.” Arcadia’s face fell a bit as she continued. “Also, I figured that having the river boats as well as the roads would make it easier to escape if Daisy caught up with us.”
The mood in the clearing soured as Daisy’s name was uttered, but after a few seconds Leor did her best to break the tension.
“Diareen, huh? Can’t say I’ve heard of it before, but it sounds like as good a plan as any. I vote that we follow along with Arcadia.”
There was a quick chorus of agreement as the rest of the party also expressed their support of the plan. We hadn’t spent long in Tripit, but we hoped this would also work well for us - we figured we could look for work as guards for a river boat or something. The only thing I was certain of was that it would be a long time before I accepted another rescue mission unless I absolutely couldn’t avoid it. I still felt a little nervous and jittery from the night before, and despite feeling mostly better the memory of the nightmare hung around in the back of my mind like the aftertaste of a bitter plant.
With our path being decided, I perked up and pushed down the previous night’s terrors. I felt a trickle of energy flow into my limbs and looked around the campground properly.
“Okay! With that being said, let’s make preparations for travel. How long is it to Diareen, Arcadia?”
Arcadia stayed kneeled next to Ox. As she spoke I noticed that she looked very tired - this whole ordeal had taken a huge toll on her, and it was beginning to show. I hoped I could convince her to take it easy for a bit. Regardless, she thought for a moment before giving me an estimate.
“About three weeks unfortunately, unless we get very lucky and the teamster is headed that way. Also at some point the road will go by the river so we could try and catch a river boat - they aren’t fast, especially since they’d be headed upstream instead of down, and we would need to pay our way, but we wouldn’t need to walk!”
I nodded, not particularly relishing the idea of that long spent traveling but resolved to its necessity. Leor spoke up with a question.
“Are there towns on the way? I don’t know how we’re doing with money exactly, but three weeks is a long time. We will definitely want lodging and we may even need to stop to take on work.”
Ox answered as Arcadia was trying to remember the route.
“Though Arcadia and I haven’t left Tripit much, I’m aware of some of the routes and where they lead. By my reckoning we have four or five small villages and two places big enough I’d call ‘em towns. Could be worse.”
I nodded, relieved. If the places that Ox had mentioned were spread out relatively evenly, that would be a village every few days - that felt a lot better than the ten day trek from Eightside to Tripit. With a grin, I stood and stretched.
“Well, I’ve been asleep too long today as it stands. Let’s get things prepared around here so we can head out tonight!”
There was a flurry of activity afterwards. With much protest, we managed to convince Arcadia to lay down for some rest. Despite her repeated insistence that she wasn’t tired, she was asleep within a minute of laying down and slept almost until nightfall. Oxcard also lounged, drifting into fitful bouts of sleep. As they rested, the rest of us tried to get things shifted around and packed as best we could. Most of our stuff had been at the Sable Sky since stealth had been so paramount to our mission, so we would need to wait for the teamster - Alex - to get back to actually be fully ready to go.
In addition to packing and resting, Oxcard, Oriwyn, and Laran took another go at closing Oxcard’s wound. I made the mistake of watching them remove the old stitching and had to stumble away to get sick in a bush. Eventually, I got the all-clear from Laran and came back into the clearing. Oriwyn had a bucket full of bloody rags that she was going to take to a river and wash. Leor volunteered to go with her, and the two of them left. Meanwhile Oxcard was sitting propped up fully after some time to recover and looked a little better, though redoing the stitches had obviously caused him pain. By the time Alex returned, Oxcard looked like he might actually be healthy enough to walk.
We still didn’t let him of course.
I talked with Alex a bit, thanking them for their help and making good on the price that they had haggled down from Laran the night previous. They offered to give us a ride, which we gladly accepted, and helped us pack our bags up as well. In return for their kindness I offered whatever services we could render to make their journey more comfortable. They accepted, though both of us knew there wasn’t much we could do to help. We learned that Alex would be able to take us as far as Squat’s Hollow - about a third of the total journey - before needing to attend to their own business, which was about as lucky as we could reasonably hope to be. As night began to fall, we had everything loaded on the teamster’s wagon, including Oxcard. Just in case, Oriwyn went ahead of the impromptu caravan to check for any of Daisy’s goons, but seeing no one, we made our way out to the road and started on the next stage of our journey.
Elsewhere: The large man was on his tiptoes trying to reach the top of a shelf, straining to get the can of beans down. Frustrated, he rocked his weight back down onto his heels and glared at the beans disdainfully. With a sigh, he called for his wife to help him out, hoping she wasn’t busy with customers. As his wife opened the door, he reflected on how lucky he had been to find her - she was kind, warm, smart, had a great way when dealing with people, and was taller than him by at least half a head. The man didn’t know why he liked tall women, but he knew he certainly did and fate had seen fit to imbue this lovely giantess with everything else he had been looking for in a partner. She immediately saw the offending can and got it down for him, taking a quick moment to give the man a quick kiss on the tip of his nose. A goofy smile spread across his face as she turned back and closed the storeroom door, returning to the desk at the front of the building. After all, Yada’s combination inn, bath-house, and general store was the only thing in the woods for miles, and someone would always show up eventually.
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First Previous Next
Chapter 26 - Rest for the Righteous
Last Time: Aiden, Laran, Leor, and Oriwyn - under the employ of Arcadia - executed a daring plan to rescue Oxcard from the clutches of the crime boss Daisy. They managed to get to his room without trouble, but leaving proved to be much more difficult. Laran was cornered and forced to fight several thugs after being seen while skulking around Daisy’s compound. The rest of the party found him and made sure he won the fight but were unable to prevent one of the thugs from alerting the entire building to their presence. What followed was a harrowing flight from Daisy’s forces and Daisy herself. With Leor’s assistance, everyone was able to clear the building and run off into the night, but not without sustaining several injuries. The party made good their getaway however with their client and target in tow and, determined to stay ahead of Daisy’s reprisal, left the city of Tripit behind.
Daisy clutched my throat, the slashes across her face leaking crimson blood that pooled in her snarled teeth. She looked like a wild thing and had me both lifted and pinned to a wall as if I weighed almost nothing. I struggled to breath, kicking my legs feebly, until I suddenly woke up.
Laran was staring down at me. He looked very concerned and more than a little frightened. It took my brain another few seconds to adjust to our surroundings and fully shake off the nightmare.
All of us were arrayed around a clearing underneath hastily constructed tents. I could see Oriwyn crouched beside Ox, who was laying out in the middle of the clearing. Oriwyn’s nose was swollen and her green skin was mottled purple around it - her face looked a little crooked in general, but she seemed to be moving fine enough. Arcadia stood next to the pair, holding a fan and waving it at Oxcard’s face. Groaning, I sat up. Leor sat on a tree stump and glanced at me with a tired grin. Brams lay curled up by her feet, and every once in a while I noticed she would reach down and scratch his head while Oriwyn busied herself with Oxcard.
As I sat up, Laran’s concerned expression broke into a relieved smile so genuine that it made my heart hurt. I wasn’t even injured, yet here he was acting like I’d just gotten up off my death bed. My head still felt fuzzy, so when he held a canteen out to me I took it gladly and took a big drink of water. I granted myself a few moments of silence before getting down to the business of trying to lead again.
“Where exactly are we again? I remember slumping down on the road when Arcadia’s golem gave out, but I don’t really remember anything after that.”
Laran smiled and nodded. The sun shone down on his jade-green skin and helped burn away the remaining damp from the night before. Laran sat back and seemed to finally properly relax. As he did, I couldn’t stop my attention from being wholly drawn to him.
In that moment he was really, really good to look at. And listen to. And be around.
“Ain’t surprised you don’t remember much - we had a time a’ things for sure. Last night - g’morning by the way - a teamster named Alex found us and dragged our sorry hides to this clearin’ off the road. They didn’t ask much about us, though they seemed to get the impression we were in need a’ help something fierce. Right now they’re headed back to Tripit to get our stuff from the Sable Sky - I worked out a price to make it worth their time and delay, then they only accepted half o’ it - and we’re patching everyone up.”
I nodded thoughtfully and took another swig of water. As I swished it in my mouth I realized my throat felt raw as if I’d been yelling or screaming - I hoped I hadn’t been and that the raw feeling in my throat had been solely caused by stress. My mind flicked through a few things to say - I figured I was the Commander, and as bad as we all looked and felt we had still won - before I landed on a sardonic tone. It was time to celebrate with the troops.
“Well everyone, good work. Sorry for sleeping in - I need my beauty sleep much more than the rest of you!” I grinned in what I hoped was a confident way. Oriwyn laughed a bit - it sounded like it hurt her a little to laugh unfortunately - while Leor just snorted. My tone and face shifted to sincerity as I continued.
“More seriously everyone, I think we did it. I think we won despite the odds. How is Oxcard doing?”
I glanced at Arcadia. Tears welled in her eyes and I could tell she was furiously blinking them back.
“Ox is okay, or stable at least. He keeps on breathing and Ori thinks she’s finally managed to fully stem the bleeding.” Arcadia looked down, worried, at her brother. Oriwyn smiled up at her and stood, wiping her slightly bloody hands on a cloth she had on her person. The goblin-mouse reached over and patted the taller woman’s shoulder.
“He’ll be right as rain, especially when he wakes up I think. He’s really quite deft with a needle - I’ve seen sloppier stitch work on people’s pants than he managed to do to himself.”
The ghost of a smile touched Arcadia’s lips as she gazed down at the sleeping Oxcard.
“Yes, he’s always been good with needle and thread. He was the one who kept our clothes in good repair when we were growing up, and unfortunately this isn’t his first improvised surgery. Ox is a survivor. He’ll pull through.”
I noticed, but obviously chose not to comment on, the quiver in her voice when she said that her brother would pull through. I looked him over myself - he seemed to be breathing evenly, and there were some bandages tied around his whole torso that were yet to be spotted with blood, so that seemed like a good sign at least. Satisfied, I turned back to address the group as a whole.
“Can I get a status report from everyone? How are we all doing?”
Laran immediately answered.
“I thought you might want to know! For injuries, I’ve received a small cut on my torso. Arcadia has some pretty bad gashes on her left palm and right forearm. Oriwyn is bruised and her nose was broken - Leor snapped it back in place a few hours ago when Ori started having some trouble breathing, so it looks pretty nasty. Speaking of Leor, she has some burns on her hands from her stunt with the lightning, but Ori managed to find some weird plant I’d never heard of that’s been helping with the pain. Finally, Brams got something of a cut, but it isn’t very deep. It is on his wing though, so as it is healing he will need to be careful about moving too much.”
I nodded and thanked Laran for his report. He looked pleased with himself, and I resolved to thank him privately later for helping me lead the team. All in all, we had gotten off relatively okay. All of us were alive and we had managed to achieve our objective. I took a moment to savor the victory before my mind stumbled into the next inevitable question.
What now?
I sighed as I began to contemplate the question. We likely couldn’t go back to Tripit since Daisy knew what we looked like. Leor might be able to chance it since she’d been outside the whole time, but even then I didn’t think any of us were in a hurry to test that theory out. As another consideration, Arcadia had been through a lot with us, and I felt like I needed to address that fact before too awful long.
“Arcadia, what’s your plan? Or what was your plan? Because I think I can speak for all of us when I say that we don’t want to go back to Tripit any time soon.” I said it with a laugh, but Arcadia looked anxious. I suddenly realized what I said could come across as accusatory. “Hey, it’s not your fault. We knew what we were signing up for and we all did it willingly.”
“You shouldn’t have. Glad you did though.”
The voice was scratchy and strained, husky and rough. We all whipped around to see Ox’s head slightly raised. He had a hand up to shade his eyes from the sun. As we stared at the newly awakened orc, Arcadia sank to her knees and started crying what I could only assume were happy tears. Oxcard grinned thinly and shuffled back, bracing himself against the pillow that had been jammed under his head in an attempt to sit up a little straighter.
“Come on Arcay, get over here.”
Arcadia shuffled over to Ox, nearly crawling. She wrapped him in a gentle hug, careful not to disturb his wounds. He raised his arms and wrapped the human-shadeling in a hug. Her head nestled against his shoulder and she whispered something. The rest of us tried to give them what space we could. When Arcadia broke off the hug and sat back on her haunches, the white spots of skin on her face near her eyes were splotched red with tears. She turned to the rest of us.
“I cannot thank you enough. You all did what no one else was willing to.” It looked like she was searching for more words, but was having a hard time coming up with them. “We cannot thank you enough.”
Ox nodded low in an approximation of a bow.
“Assuming we’ve put enough distance between ourselves and the city, I think we’re safe for the moment. I should be ready to move on by nightfall.”
Oriwyn made a sound like someone lightly stepping on a chicken, a sort of strangled squawk with a burbling undercurrent thanks to her nose.
“Nightfall? As in nightfall tonight?!? As in you’re going to get up and walk tonight?” Her tone was incredulous, and I inclined to agree with her. Oxcard was clearly still not okay, and even if he could walk I didn’t think it would do his stitching any favors. Arcadia just smiled and stood up.
“Okay, we can get moving tonight if everyone else is okay to move. I’ve got a few golems here, and this time someone will be awake enough they won’t rip themselves open trying to get away from someone who is trying to help them.”
It was amazing how quickly her tone changed. She had just been tearfully hugging him, and now she sounded wry and sarcastic at her brother’s antics like he was a six year old who had brought her a mud pie or something. I shook my head in wonder - none of the rest of us in the party had siblings as we all were only children. Obviously Arcadia and Oxcard had not been born to the same mother - my rudimentary knowledge of how the birds and bees worked with the ancestries in Tala indicated as much - but still, they acted like how I thought siblings acted, and they obviously shared a deep bond. It felt good to have that dynamic around, as if it were something the rest of us might have been missing as a group. Shaking myself out of my reverie, I decided to make an announcement.
“I’ve been thinking, and I wanted to offer the two of you a chance to join our group.” I looked around at the existing members of the party, and they all nodded happily. Oriwyn nodded so aggressively she winced as the movement jostled her injured nose. Arcadia and Oxcard looked at each other. I hastened on to add more.
“You don’t need to decide now of course. Actually, if you’ll have us, I was going to ask if we could accompany you to wherever you planned to go Arcadia. We should be safer in a group if any part of the road is likely to be treacherous, plus new company is always a good thing.”
Oxcard said a few quiet things to Arcadia, who said a few quiet things back. I tried not to listen in despite my burning curiosity. Oxcard shrugged and said something else, and then Arcadia turned back to us all.
“My plan was to go to Diareen. It’s a trade city out towards the northern edge of the province. It’s not as big as Tripit, but I figured it would be big enough that we could find something to do.” Arcadia’s face fell a bit as she continued. “Also, I figured that having the river boats as well as the roads would make it easier to escape if Daisy caught up with us.”
The mood in the clearing soured as Daisy’s name was uttered, but after a few seconds Leor did her best to break the tension.
“Diareen, huh? Can’t say I’ve heard of it before, but it sounds like as good a plan as any. I vote that we follow along with Arcadia.”
There was a quick chorus of agreement as the rest of the party also expressed their support of the plan. We hadn’t spent long in Tripit, but we hoped this would also work well for us - we figured we could look for work as guards for a river boat or something. The only thing I was certain of was that it would be a long time before I accepted another rescue mission unless I absolutely couldn’t avoid it. I still felt a little nervous and jittery from the night before, and despite feeling mostly better the memory of the nightmare hung around in the back of my mind like the aftertaste of a bitter plant.
With our path being decided, I perked up and pushed down the previous night’s terrors. I felt a trickle of energy flow into my limbs and looked around the campground properly.
“Okay! With that being said, let’s make preparations for travel. How long is it to Diareen, Arcadia?”
Arcadia stayed kneeled next to Ox. As she spoke I noticed that she looked very tired - this whole ordeal had taken a huge toll on her, and it was beginning to show. I hoped I could convince her to take it easy for a bit. Regardless, she thought for a moment before giving me an estimate.
“About three weeks unfortunately, unless we get very lucky and the teamster is headed that way. Also at some point the road will go by the river so we could try and catch a river boat - they aren’t fast, especially since they’d be headed upstream instead of down, and we would need to pay our way, but we wouldn’t need to walk!”
I nodded, not particularly relishing the idea of that long spent traveling but resolved to its necessity. Leor spoke up with a question.
“Are there towns on the way? I don’t know how we’re doing with money exactly, but three weeks is a long time. We will definitely want lodging and we may even need to stop to take on work.”
Ox answered as Arcadia was trying to remember the route.
“Though Arcadia and I haven’t left Tripit much, I’m aware of some of the routes and where they lead. By my reckoning we have four or five small villages and two places big enough I’d call ‘em towns. Could be worse.”
I nodded, relieved. If the places that Ox had mentioned were spread out relatively evenly, that would be a village every few days - that felt a lot better than the ten day trek from Eightside to Tripit. With a grin, I stood and stretched.
“Well, I’ve been asleep too long today as it stands. Let’s get things prepared around here so we can head out tonight!”
There was a flurry of activity afterwards. With much protest, we managed to convince Arcadia to lay down for some rest. Despite her repeated insistence that she wasn’t tired, she was asleep within a minute of laying down and slept almost until nightfall. Oxcard also lounged, drifting into fitful bouts of sleep. As they rested, the rest of us tried to get things shifted around and packed as best we could. Most of our stuff had been at the Sable Sky since stealth had been so paramount to our mission, so we would need to wait for the teamster - Alex - to get back to actually be fully ready to go.
In addition to packing and resting, Oxcard, Oriwyn, and Laran took another go at closing Oxcard’s wound. I made the mistake of watching them remove the old stitching and had to stumble away to get sick in a bush. Eventually, I got the all-clear from Laran and came back into the clearing. Oriwyn had a bucket full of bloody rags that she was going to take to a river and wash. Leor volunteered to go with her, and the two of them left. Meanwhile Oxcard was sitting propped up fully after some time to recover and looked a little better, though redoing the stitches had obviously caused him pain. By the time Alex returned, Oxcard looked like he might actually be healthy enough to walk.
We still didn’t let him of course.
I talked with Alex a bit, thanking them for their help and making good on the price that they had haggled down from Laran the night previous. They offered to give us a ride, which we gladly accepted, and helped us pack our bags up as well. In return for their kindness I offered whatever services we could render to make their journey more comfortable. They accepted, though both of us knew there wasn’t much we could do to help. We learned that Alex would be able to take us as far as Squat’s Hollow - about a third of the total journey - before needing to attend to their own business, which was about as lucky as we could reasonably hope to be. As night began to fall, we had everything loaded on the teamster’s wagon, including Oxcard. Just in case, Oriwyn went ahead of the impromptu caravan to check for any of Daisy’s goons, but seeing no one, we made our way out to the road and started on the next stage of our journey.
Elsewhere: The large man was on his tiptoes trying to reach the top of a shelf, straining to get the can of beans down. Frustrated, he rocked his weight back down onto his heels and glared at the beans disdainfully. With a sigh, he called for his wife to help him out, hoping she wasn’t busy with customers. As his wife opened the door, he reflected on how lucky he had been to find her - she was kind, warm, smart, had a great way when dealing with people, and was taller than him by at least half a head. The man didn’t know why he liked tall women, but he knew he certainly did and fate had seen fit to imbue this lovely giantess with everything else he had been looking for in a partner. She immediately saw the offending can and got it down for him, taking a quick moment to give the man a quick kiss on the tip of his nose. A goofy smile spread across his face as she turned back and closed the storeroom door, returning to the desk at the front of the building. After all, Yada’s combination inn, bath-house, and general store was the only thing in the woods for miles, and someone would always show up eventually.
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I am fed up of constantly having to decide what we eat, where we go, what we do, where to go on holiday.
I am so tired of it. It’s begun to cause arguments and fights.
I make almost every single decision in our relationship and I am tired of it. I have expressed over and over that I would like him to make more effort in giving opinions or thoughts on simple things like dinner, shopping, places to go. But a day or two later and it’s back to the same shit. Me forced to make all the decisions. “Just you decide” “I don’t care” “just pick!!”
He just called when on his way back from work and we discussed what to get for dinner, I asked him to just pick something up at the shop while he’s in, and it caused an argument. He accused me of being “difficult” etc. when I asked him to just choose something at the shop.
Am I being difficult? I can’t see what’s in the shop, I know generally that they have but it’s easier if he just chooses something that’s in store when he’s there.
He accuses me of being picky, which is true but he knows everything that I like and will eat so to me, that’s not a factor but just a cop out reason.
What do I do Reddit?

Supp yall, I wanna hear your opinion, advice etc.
So I'm 23, turning 24 soon, I have a job (junior level), and I'm entering my last year at University (failed the third year because I started working but getting back on track). I have a girlfriend, and we've been together for 3ish years, very happy with her even after that long it still feels like in the beginning. Traveled a bit seen a few European countries (I'm from Europe), been to festivals and holidays with friends, and I have a very solid friend group for now, overall a lot of connections. I'm living with a roommate in a different city from where I grew up. Many people I spoke to about serious topics said that my way of thinking is way above my age and that I'm a realist and positive person overall - with which I agree but I feel "empty". Like I'm in some void going forward but staying in place, as I'm not good enough and because my path (especially in work life) is a lot different from my peers (I'm not afraid to stand up to higher-ups if I think they are wrong and to express my opinion, but I do listen and acknowledge when I'm in wrong) and sometimes inner battles are hard (not suicidal at all, I love life) as I'm neither a boy nor a man. I spoke with a few friends and girlfriend but I don't think that they totally understand. What do you guys think, I know it's normal to go through stuff like this but I have never heard a third perspective on it (psychotherapist is quite expensive)

Supp yall, I wanna hear your opinion, advice etc.
So I'm 23, turning 24 soon, I have a job (junior level), and I'm entering my last year at University (failed the third year because I started working but getting back on track). I have a girlfriend, and we've been together for 3ish years, very happy with her even after that long it still feels like in the beginning. Traveled a bit seen a few European countries (I'm from Europe), been to festivals and holidays with friends, and I have a very solid friend group for now, overall a lot of connections. I'm living with a roommate in a different city from where I grew up. Many people I spoke to about serious topics said that my way of thinking is way above my age and that I'm a realist and positive person overall - with which I agree but I feel "empty". Like I'm in some void going forward but staying in place, as I'm not good enough and because my path (especially in work life) is a lot different from my peers (I'm not afraid to stand up to higher-ups if I think they are wrong and to express my opinion, but I do listen and acknowledge when I'm in wrong) and sometimes inner battles are hard (not suicidal at all, I love life) as I'm neither a boy nor a man. I spoke with a few friends and girlfriend but I don't think that they totally understand. What do you guys think, I know it's normal to go through stuff like this but I have never heard a third perspective on it (psychotherapist is quite expensive)

Strap in. It's a long one, and may be a bit NSFW. I'll start with the background, could be important. We've been together 17 years, and obviously there have been highs and lows.
We're both bisexual but I don't think that really has any bearing on the situation.
Up until about four or five years ago, I had a somewhat insatiable sex drive. To the point where it started to feel like I might have a condition or an addiction. Often it would feel to me like I was pestering her for sex. At the time she was working long shifts in nursing, I can understand that she would be tired and maybe not interested in sex. Eventually (like I said, four or five years ago) I managed to control my urges and started initiating sex a lot less. Things got good, we were intimate when we both felt like it, and the sex was good. She got a new job in IT, working from home when the covid thing happened. And her sex drive suddenly went through the roof. A complete 180, now it sometimes felt like she was pestering me. I struggled to keep up honestly and it showed. She told me it felt like I was just "going through the motions". I got a new job after the whole covid thing, now I was (still am) doing 12-14 hour shifts daily, coming home absolutely shattered. Add to this that I've put on a fair bit of weight, and the guys at work like to joke about that kind of thing, with not being able to satisfy my fiancée in the bedroom, it's safe to say I feel like I'm at my lowest point mentally. I have never felt this depressed.
Things came to a head in April this year, around the time of our anniversary. We booked a week away in a nice little cabin. There was a hot tub, it was secluded. She packed a few toys and nice lingerie she had bought especially for the occasion. But on the first day I struggled to bring her to climax, not a thing that happens a lot, but has happened more than I would like recently. We had a chat and I confessed that the stress of work and how I don't feel great about myself right now has kind of killed my sex drive. She said she understood but I could tell she was upset. Understandable. We enjoyed the holiday overall and we were intimate a few times, one of which was the best we'd had in a long while. Now, we had discussed a few times in the past the possibility of introducing another person in the bedroom. And even the possibility of seperate "playmates". While on the holiday, I suggested it again. She laughed and said she wouldn't want to, as she thought it might make things worse for me in my current mental state.
One reason we discussed seperate "playmates" is because there are fetishes that we don't share. To the point where she expressed interest in something in particular that turned me off so much I flat out said "go and find someone else to do that for you"
So. About a week after our holiday she came to me and said she had indeed found someone to indulge in her fetish with. Now I must preface that this fetish does not involve penetrative sex. We had a discussion and set some boundaries. Those boundaries being no penetrative or oral sex. Anything else is on the table, go and have fun. She told me who this other person was, and it's a male friend she has told me about before. They met on a discord server for people with "deviant" sexual tastes (I think. I'm not entirely sure of the actual purpose of the server, it started when another server (one that revolved around sharing NSFW/risqué pics of goblins, that I was also a member of) kind of went to shit). Now I need to make it clear that I'm not some kind of prude. I have my own deviant tastes, just some things aren't to my taste. This friend she had met up with once before. She told me it was for drinks and there were other people there. She also went on to tell me that he was a shy type that had no real friends and was lonely. She hung out with this guy one on one a few times afterwards and told me that she felt sorry for him because he was lonely and had no friends. When we discussed her meeting up with this guy to indulge in her fetish, she added that he was not her type and that she wasn't even sexually attracted to him.
On the day she was going to meet up, she left very early, a lot earlier than I had assumed she would. But it is like a 3 hour bus journey, so I thought nothing of it. The whole day I worried. We had agreed that she would share her location with me in case anything happened. But she shared it for an hour and then nothing the rest of the day. At about midnight, she messaged me saying she had missed her bus and could I come pick her up from the station in that town. Of course I agreed. When I picked her up I asked her how it was, and would she be doing it again. She said it was "alright" and might do it again. She also mentioned that she had tried to give the guy a "happy ending" but that he couldn't keep his erection. I don't know why she felt the need to tell me that but thought nothing of it at the time.
I will say that after that day, I don't know if it's jealousy or some kind of fetish I didn't know I had, but my sex drive has started to improve. This is important for later I think. About a week later she told me she would be going to hang out with him again, but just to hang out. The next morning I went to work, and found that I had gone in too early as they had put me on a later shift and I failed to check the rota board. So I went back home. Bearing in mind this was between 7 and 8am. When I got home my fiancée was nowhere to be seen. I admittedly panicked a little. Something snapped in me and I tried to call her. She didn't answer 3 times. Then she called me back about 15 minutes later saying she was on her way to her friend's place and that he had messaged her the night before and asked her to hang out, and that she could work from his house. I noticed that it sounded like she was indoors, not on a bus or train. It was like she was in a hall that echoed.
I went on with my day, but couldn't stop thinking about her and what she was doing. She was out until midnight again and I really started to worry then. I actually broke down crying. Shamefully, I also tried to access her computer to look at her discord conversations with her friend. I found that the pin she usually uses does not work on he pc and her discord password no longer works on our shared tablet. When she got home she apologised for not telling me. I told her her how it made me feel and that I had tried to get into her discord account and she said she hadn't changed her passwords then she apologised again and said if I wanted she would stop hanging out with him. Of course I said that wasn't necessary and I was just being silly, but she does need to tell me when she's going and how long she's going to be.
The latest thing, the one that has cemented my thoughts that she's not sticking to those boundaries we set happened last Friday. She said on the Tuesday that she was gonna meet her friend on Friday for "a meal and drinks" to celebrate her birthday which was on the Sunday. Now I assumed that a meal and drinks would mean an evening thing, right? On the Thursday night she showered and did her hair. Putting in a LOT of effort. She's quite meticulous with her appearance, but this just struck me as a lot. Then on the Friday morning, I left for work. She messaged me at 10:30 letting me know she was on her way. I asked why so early and she brushed it off saying its a 3 hour bus ride. So I thought okay, maybe she plans to come home earlier.
When I get home I find a few things out of place that concern me. The first is that in the shower, there is her douche. It's normally kept in the cupboard and she only ever uses it when she plans on doing some "butt stuff" (this also includes what she did with her friend, that I admit I've been considering trying in an attempt to remove him from the equation). The second thing was that the draw of my end table next to the bed was open. I normally keep condoms and lube and some toys in this draw. There is one particular lube we have exclusively for butt stuff. That bottle was not in the draw. I lost my cool. I got very angry and punched a wall. I may have damaged my hand. I left it and stewed in my own bile for a few hours. Then at about 10 I messaged her and asked about the douche and lube. After an uncharacteristic pause (with the "typing" bubble appearing and disappearing a few times) She brushed it off, has no idea where the lube is and douched because she was worried about a smell down there due to her period.
At half past midnight she still hadn't texted me to tell me she was on her way home. Cue another bout of anger and more tears. I messaged her asking if she was coming home. After another uncharacteristic pause, She said she was on her way and would be 40 minutes, but would get an uber from the station. Now I know for sure she would have missed her last bus and it takes about 40 minutes to drive from her friend's town, so I instantly thought she was lying. I waited outside to see if she had in fact got an uber. As far as I can tell she did. But maybe from her friends place instead of the station. We had another long discussion and she reiterated that she didn't know where the lube was and that she wasn't having any kind of sex with her friend. I told her I thought she made a lot of effort for just a meal and drinks and she just said I was being ridiculous and it's the normal amount of effort she would make. She offered to show me the contents of her bag so I could see she didn't have the lube with her. I gave up and said that wouldn't be necessary, my insecurities were just making me paranoid. I even told her exactly what I thought was going on. Basically accused her of cheating. The whole time she didn't get angry or even look upset in the slightest. I asked her about it and she just said she understands how it looks and she's not angry or upset.
We celebrated her birthday over the weekend, we didn't have sex, which is a little unusual, but considering what happened on Friday, I can understand. On Wednesday however I was tidying up before going to work, and I accidentally knocked her bag off of the sofa. The contents spilled out and as I was picking them up I found the missing bottle of lube. Now this was a new bottle when I last saw it, still had the plastic seal over the lid, we hadn't used it yet. But when it fell out of her bag and I picked it up, there was no seal. I tried to forget it and go to work. Maybe she put it there when we went out the weekend before? But unfortunately on the way to work I started to panic. I couldn't focus on anything but that bottle and I started shaking and my chest felt tight. So I told my boss I had to go home.
When my fiancée woke up I confronted her with the bottle. She said she had no idea it was in her bag. She even said why would she tell me to look for it if she knew it was there and was trying to hide it. I broke down. I ugly cried, huddled in a blanket, shaking. I pleaded with her to tell me the truth. And the whole time she remained calm, I even thought emotionless. She's normally a very empathetic person, doesn't like to see people cry, and has said on multiple occasions that men crying really gets to her and makes her upset.
At this point I can't help thinking something is definitely going on. But I can't get any proof. I don't want to push it with her, I don't want to ask her to show me her discord conversations. I just want to forget the whole thing. I love this woman, and she says she loves me too. I wish I could just go on like nothing has happened. But whenever I get a moment to myself I have thoughts that she's going to leave me. She's just waiting for something. I don't know what. Both of our birthdays are within two weeks and I'm worried that after mine, this coming Tuesday, she's going to drop this huge bomb.
Sorry for the long post, any help on how to put it out of my mind would be great. TLDR is in the title.
Edited for formatting because I guess this is why I always see people saying sorry for posting using their phone.

My family is going on vacation to Disney bc of work rewards.(has to be a holiday inn in Florida, that’s the reward) But I’m trans, am I safe within the walls of Disney? Can the government take me from my family (I’m won’t quite be 18 when we go) the laws in Florida scare me. If I am open about being trans in Disney world, will I be “turned in”? Magic Guides did an article(Is Disney World Transgender Friendly?) say the staff is taught to be accepting to trans people (posted in February) so I’m hoping that’s still a standard when we go. I want to be myself and be safe.
(Note: I’m a Canadian citizen and would also like to know if I can be taken anyway or does being Canadian give me protection)
TL:DR am I safe from the laws in Florida inside of Disney