Hello there!
I hold an MA in educational sciences, I worked as a teacher for 4 years ( online and on site ) and I have as well experience in customer service ( online and on site). I have taken a break from work to finish my thesis. As I am starting my PhD in few months , I only need a part time job but I don't seem to have luck lately.
Any idea where to look for one ? ( I have skills in writing blog articles, creating social media content and video editing as well )

I currently work as a paralegal and I’m considering applying to law school. My state asks a character and fitness question, asking you to disclose “have you ever been terminated , suspended, discharged, or permitted to resign in lieu of termination from any employment?” However, the C&F test asks you to only include work history from 5 years back. When I was in college and even younger, I always worked part time jobs to support myself. I was fired from over 5 of those positions. I’m slightly concerned that I would need to disclose all of them and an addendum, to answer the question in full “ever been… from any employment”. The positions I was terminated from were extremely minor and in food service and other service industries like selling tickets at a tourist attraction or a camp counselor position. Even the first job I ever had at Rita’s Ice, when I was 16 years old, the manager let me go after 2 shifts because she wanted me to have my own transportation. Then in college when I was working at a cupcake shop and a few other restaurants. Ridiculous things like that sounds petty and small, on paper, and would certainly not like to weigh down my application with.
Additionally, I have significant work experience after college and pro bono internships I completed during college, that speaks for itself. I have been working for attorneys for over 4 years now. I worked my way up from admin, to legal assistant, to paralegal. The second firm I worked at let me go after a year, but would not cite reasons other than they didn’t feel it was a good match, but would be happy to serve as a reference moving forward. The other partners of firms I’ve worked for, including the current firm I work at, have offered to write me letters of recommendation for law school.

TL;DR I was hired with the expectation of working remotely set in an email from the recruiter, but now because of some bureaucratic BS am expected to comply with the company's new hybrid policy. Curious if it's legal what they're doing and whether it's worth pushing back.
Hi everyone, I've been working in tech for a large financial company since early '22. When I was offered the position, the email from the recruiter (not the official offer letter) said:

{ Location }
You're aligned to our {City}, MA office, but will work remotely from your home.
We are currently remote, and as of now the return to office date will be no earlier than Monday, March 7th, 2022.
Also, check this out: <{Company} Declares Future as a Hybrid Work Company>(Link to article)

It's worth noting that I live >1000 miles from the office mentioned, with the nearest other office being >500 miles away. The official offer letter doesn't mention a location, but possibly relevant is that it does state that I would be employed at-will and the company "reserves the right to alter or change the terms and conditions of your employment at any time and for any reason..."
At the time of the offer, I shared a car with my wife, who is expected to commute to work, so effectively I had no car at my disposal. This continues to be the case today. I can't say for sure whether I would have accepted the offer if I knew upfront that I would be expected to commute to work, but I was happily employed at another company that fully allowed me to work remotely and viewed the change as an increase in pay with no downsides.
Since then, the company has implemented a new hybrid policy that requires us to come into the office 2-3 times a week, or roughly 50% of the time. The policy also states they will not accept applications for "remote exceptions" for employees who live within 50 miles of a company office. Coincidentally, the company added an office in the metro area where I live, well within 50 miles of my house. After chatting with HR, I learned that despite the expectation set in the recruiter's email, I was not given a remote exception when I was hired, and would not be eligible to apply for one because of the 50-mile rule (side note: they said that since I was technically based out of the MA office, I would be expected there rather than the local one, and was graciously given the option of having my manager request that I be moved to the local office).
So with all that in mind, I'm wondering if I have any legal footing here, or if that legal footing can practically be leveraged, either as simply a chip for negotiation, or as an actual lawsuit if push came to shove. I worry that the verbiage in the recruiter's email doesn't necessarily imply that the remote arrangement was meant to be indefinite, that the email isn't binding like an official offer letter is, and/or that the at-will/reservation of rights clause in the official cover letter takes the bite out of any legal claims I might make. Furthermore, other than the hybrid thing, I have been fairly happy with the company; they seem fairly stable in a time of mass-firings of tech workers, plus I've consistently earned bonuses and raises and there's definitely upward mobility opportunity, so I worry that any damages I might win wouldn't be worth burning a bridge and not being able to find a better position (seems like lots of companies are moving back to in-office/hybrid these days).
Some other somewhat relevant info:
While my manager has told me he's looking into getting me a remote exception despite the 50-mile rule, I've been complying with the hybrid policy because I don't know what the consequences are otherwise. The first couple weeks, I took the train and my bike to the office, but two weeks ago it was rainy so I left the bike at home and took the connecting bus service to the office. Coincidentally, the week after that I came down with covid.
Some other parts of the situation that annoy me are that the new office in my area was made for another branch of the company, my manager looked and found that I'm the only employee in our entire branch in the area. Meanwhile, the rest of my team and the branch as a whole are geographically distributed, so I'm not getting any in-person collaboration benefit. Also, my manager, and his manager, and even his manager's manager, have all told me it doesn't matter to them if I come into an office or not, and my performance evaluations have been consistently good before the implementation of the policy.
I've also told my manager that I don't necessarily need a remote exception, as long as I get some assurance from someone with the appropriate authority that he would have the discretion to be flexible with when I'm expected to come in. A couple ideas of what that might look like in practice: my wife said she might be able to convince her boss to let her work remotely one day per week, so my boss could say that I just come in that one day, or we could agree that under ideal conditions I come in 3 days a week, but if it rains, instead of taking the bus I just work remotely that day.

They were being subjected to cult brainwashing techniques.
Isolation from friends and family, humiliation rituals, love bombing and verbal abuse, physical exhaustion, lack of adequate sleep, poor nutrition, a mysterious and forceful charismatic leader "Jason Goldstriker", a "good cop" (Jet), keeping the door to leave open at all times but presenting a carrot to keep them in (money, love-bombing, etc) so they are psychologically persuaded to choose to stay.
The TTS and the chime acted as a thought disruptor, it kept them from being able to think during the lulls and from communicating with each other properly. Any TTS message that might snap them out of it (e.g. "what if your mother saw that?") are manually filtered by the production crew so that only messages that are either meaningless, encouraging them to keep going or general abuse get through.
They developed Stockholm syndrome and wanted to stay (partly due to the sunk cost fallacy) and force themselves through a series of more intense humiliation rituals so they will be allowed to stay.
After enough trauma and exhaustion is inflicted the victim loses their sense of self, they begin to identify with their victimizer and the cult then rebuilds them as something that can service them.
The "streaming boot camp" offer proves it. He likely wants to keep Josie and Letty to get them to sign a predatory contract that charges usurious fees for their "help" in learning how to stream (something which a youtube video could teach), including renting out space and equipment in their studio. When they inevitably cannot pay they will be offered another contract that makes the girls work for him until the debt is paid but for as long as the girls use his studio, equipment and "mentoring" she will keep accruing debt meaning she will never have any independent control over her own work.
Josie is perfect for them since she is autistic, easily influenced by strong personalities, gullible, ignorant and desperate to escape poverty. This also appeals to the simp mindset, she's the physical embodiment of an anime girl because her childlike nature activates the protective instincts of simps who are lonely men that feel useless.
Letty is also good because she believes she's practically one of the crew now. She is good at manipulating the audience and getting them to hate and love her, as well as crafting a backstory designed to appeal to the typical Hyde fan.
And you are also groomed by the show into being simps. You watched it daily due to FOMO, creating a deeply parasocial relationship with these people by feeling sad when they suffer and cheering every small victory. And since challenges are partly determined by opinion polls of viewers the fans of the waifus will steer them to the finish and will be desperate to continue their parasocial relationship with them on whatever streaming service they end up on.
Also they'll probably fuck the girls. I mean some of the mini challenges basically felt like simulated sex. The stuffing marshmallows in their mouths, making them gag? The licking Chris thing? That was like a fetish video. Come on, "Lick the most disgusting thing in the room and I didn't outright say Chris so it's not my fault if you do" when he'd be the most disgusting thing in a morgue during a heat wave. Also they did that late in the day after the girls had been physically and mentally exhausted which meant they wouldn't resist doing something so overtly sexual after being trained for so long in following orders without question.
He makes money off of Fishtank, he will make money off of his future e-girl stable, he then funnels that money into more MDE World Peace which is his real passion and will make even more money since it will be edgy comedy with high production values and no censorship or concern for political correctness, which is something that can't really be found these days.
4chan was Hyde's downfall since it influenced his edgy nihilistic right wing comedy tinged with a scintilla of nazism. 4chan in a sense groomed him. He attracted a flock of loyal fans, a lot from 4chan, with whom his comedy resonated. Over time through interaction with this fan base he came to understand their group psychology: lonely terminally online somewhat autistic males prone to forming parasocial relationships.
He figured out how to groom this fan following to work for him so he doesn't have to rattle a tin cup on streams trying to be a youtube celeb that gets shunned by other youtubers.
Fishtank is edgy, Fishtank is full of autists ("just like me!" say the simps). Fishtank is designed to capitalize on FOMO and the parasocial relationship phenomena. Fishtank is designed to be excessively LONG because it takes at least 30 days of daily repetition for any person to create a habit, positive or negative, meaning current Fishtank addicts (paypigs) will return to get another hit next season. Fishtank will always have two girls selected by the criteria of their looks, psychological traits and background suitable for being e-girls, the more cute, quirky and pathetic the better. The two girls will have their personality traits positively reinforced during production to make them into exaggerated, one might say ANIME, versions of themselves and be cast as a villain and a heroine.
The girls, groomed and psychologically weakened by the death march of isolation and humiliation, will be very pliable and prone to signing shitty contracts. The paypigs, groomed by viewing the show, will follow the girls and give them money, most of which will go to their "mentors".
Also, the smallness of the prize relative to the amount of time, humiliation and effort required to get it is meant to attract people who are desperate enough to think it is a large amount. Desperate people are easier to control.

This is just something that piqued my curiosity today while visiting a doctor's office. Examples in healthcare setting:
https://www.masslive.com/news/2021/10/signage-on-aggressive-behavior-designed-to-protect-health-workers-promote-respect.html (News article discussing hospitals but also briefly mentioning restaurants, airlines)
https://www.doctorsofbc.ca/news/we-all-deserve-respect-downloadable-sign-doctors-offices-now-available (Example of institutional rationale)
https://web.mhanet.com/media-library/hospital-signage-outlining-behavioral-expectations-in-a-health-care-environment/ (A more enlightened rationale about what is ethical signage)

Hospitals increasingly look for ways to deter patients and visitors from engaging in aggressive or violent behavior toward staff. When considering posting signs or other notices referencing policies against violence, hospitals must consider whether they could be interpreted to deter patients from coming to the emergency department. The Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services previously condemned signs it determined could discourage patients from seeking emergency care, in violation of the Emergency Medical Treatment and Labor Act. MHA recommends hospitals use positive messages that encourage a healing environment instead of focusing on aberrant behavior by patients and visitors.

I think the trend is an interesting example of an austerity policy response, a increasing pattern that could nevertheless be generalized across different industries and countries. For example in the first article above, it is claimed the pandemic is the "cause" of a rise in interpersonal incidents (of abuse , violence, and/or "disrespect") between a customer and a worker, rather than the failure of social institutions to deal with ongoing global crises. I did a cursory search on Google Scholar but did not find a study showing that such public or semi-public signage significantly improves anything, and rather, one is reminded of all the prior research showing that zero-tolerance policies (e.g. in school settings) are counterproductive and actually backfire. Seeing certain signage makes one wonder if the medical profession in particular forgot an entire body of social science research.
I wonder if CT authors have observed and discussed this, that as a daily life example, some kinds of signage subtly normalize individual alienation and obscure the politics underlying the problem; the irony of such explicit signage in a neoliberal society is being used, compared to e.g. Zizek's soviet era experiences. Furthermore, during the lockdown/reopening era of the pandemic, there were many signs about mask wearing (and the ensuing public vs workers conflicts over masking), so it's interesting to see the post-pandemic shift from predominantly signs requiring concrete actions like putting on a mask to now explicitly requiring subjects perform a reversal of affective/emotional labor, etc.

Looking for reassurance/advice.
Hi all. I am new here, and I don't use reddit much, but I am using it as a last resort, and I'm really sorry for the long story, and appreciate any reassuring or helpful replies.
Up until last Sunday, 21st of May, everything was fine. I know I already have slight anxiety from previous things in life, for example not wanting to go out much, and being scared walking around in public. I used a vape for most of my day to day life have used one on and off for many years, but stopped cold turkey and IMMEDIATELY after having this "anxiety attack". I am an overweight individual, and have been for a long while, because of my mental health, so I have been recently worried about my physical health, whilst not doing anything about it, and being super lazy basically. I've been having the odd heart palpitation for years, and recently had noticed when laying down at my computer chair, my heart would flutter, this started happening a little bit before I started working out (because it was sort of a wake up call to me). I started working out for only 15-20 minutes a day, it's not much but it's something. I did indoors cycling. Until on 21st of May, Sunday, I was laying in my chair and I decided to call the non-emergency medical service (111 in the UK), for health advice to do with these heart palpitations, for more information and to put my mind at ease. What followed was horrific, I finished up on the phone and went to lay down to see if I would feel better, because the palpitations then continued after the phone call. (I think at this point I had already started panicking.) After laying down for no longer than 30 seconds, a pulse went through my body, almost like the strongest heart beat I've ever felt, and I felt lightheaded almost immediately. I shot up, and vocally said "Woah", at that point I rushed for my phone, and called emergency services, because I thought I was having a heart attack, I remember my heart pounding out of my chest, and feeling light headed - My heart was beating... fast but not abnormally fast. I had asked for an ambulance, and in the mean time, somebody called me from a nursing team, and they started feeding me the idea that I was having an anxiety attack. I spoke to him until I calmed down enough, I eventually ended up falling asleep sitting up in my computer chair, 1 hour~ later, the paramedic arrived. They checked my heart with an ECG machine, and checked my bloody pressure - Both were apparently perfectly okay, according to the paramedic, but she advised that I go to hospital since I'd been having the heart thump for over an hour.
I arrive at the hospital, and I feel the same symptoms start up once again, but this time I tried to breathe through it, and it wasn't nearly as bad, but still scary. I was in hospital and I was having problems with my heart, it was very stressful. In the hospital, I had another ECG check, my blood pressure and I had blood tests taken as well. After 4-5 hours of anxious waiting for results, apparently my blood tests were also completely perfect and clear. They said it was most likely anxiety.
As somebody who's been overweight their entire life, this was a huge shock to me, and I really am grateful for it. But part of me is doubting that there IS something wrong with me now, because today, 8 days later, I am experiencing most likely worse symptoms than I was before.
My symptoms in order from when they happened (Sunday 21st May):
on the Monday - My heart continued to pound, non stop for days, and still is to this day. I started worrying that I was still dying and the doctors didn't check me properly. I didn't eat much, and I definitely had trouble sleeping. I started non-stop checking my heart rate and then got extremely anxious because it was hovering around 50-65 BPM. I kept checking my pulse to make sure I was still alive and my heart wasn't going 100 miles per hour, but I would only do that when I stop feeling my heart beat, which I assume is what it's normally meant to feel like, but because I'm so anxious about things, if I don't feel my heart beat I start to panic.
Tuesday-Friday - I had this weird pressure build up in my chest, that seems to spread from the top of my stomach all the way over to underneath both of my armpits and it feels like it's above my heart, not my heart itself, though I have felt slight pressure in my heart too. The feeling is almost cold like under my skin - I mostly only get this feeling laying down but I still have it very slightly sitting up; I found a very temporary fix for that, is to lay on my side, and not my back, though that makes my heart feel like it's beating harder. In the same category as this, if I do lay on my side, I can feel that part of my chest vibrating in a way, like it's a muscle spasm. If I do lay on my back, and move slightly to the left or right it alleviates some of the pressure for a short time as well. I started having some chest pains, and arm pains. The chest pains felt like stitches, and they were very sharp, neither lasted for longer than maybe 15-30 minutes at a time. I have had sharp pains in my arms too, but those are very quick sharp pains that don't seem to repeat themselves. I started taking an over the counter medication here called "Kalms" anxiety , I believe it's a Valerian root extract or something like that I'm not even sure that it's working, I think I'm too anxious to let it work. I also started having bad bowel movements (almost complete liquid) and nausea, which apparently is a possible side effect of the Kalms medication.
Friday-Monday (29th/30th May Current time is midnight.) - Throughout the week I've been trying to take the advice of many of my family members, it's just anxiety. I'm trying to tell myself that on repeat, over and over again, but I cannot stop worrying at all. I went to go and stay else where for a night, hoping that exposure to an anxiety inducing situation would help me, but I ended up not being able to sleep, and only sleeping throughout the day. I started having unstable bowel movements,
As of right now, I'm having tightness in my jaw (Like tenseness), tightness in my upper stomach almost like I've been tensing my stomach muscles or worked them out and now it feels weird to push my stomach out, not sure if it's relief or not to relax those muscles, but if you've held in your stomach for a while and then let it bloat back out, that's the feeling I get, still having the tightness in my chest, thumping heart beat still (and has been thumping since last week), I have lost my appetite completely and I am not eating nearly enough, I'm trying to eat super healthy (For example today I had half an apple for breakfast and then a small amount of tuna, broccoli and cauliflower, and rice, of course, I'm worried about that. I'm having extreme troubles getting to sleep because I cannot get my mind away from all of this. Throughout the week I have had random outbursts of literally weeping and crying. I am experiencing feelings of weakness in my likes, they feel like jelly when I stand up. Still experiencing lightheadedness, for example I went to visit my dad to again try and put myself into an anxiety inducing situation to "combat" it, I guess, I hadn't had much sleep at all, but for most of the time I was there I was slightly light headed, and just wanted to sleep the entire time I was there - he gave me food, and I ate it all as to not be rude. I felt nauseous after, but didn't puke, but immediately after eating I had diarrhoea. I don't think it was the food, and I'm chalking that down to the Valarian Root Extract meds I've been taking, but that made me anxious for sure. I only have small bursts of diarrhoea, for like 1-2 hours, then I just don't go to the bathroom. I tried listening to a 40 minute guided meditation for sleep on YouTube this morning, and after replaying it 3 times, I managed to get to sleep, only to be suddenly woken from a nightmare, wasn't able to sleep after that until later in the day.
The pressure is really getting to me now, I'm scared my life won't ever go back to normal and I'm certainly feeling extremely pessimistic about things, and thinking bad things. For the record I have been offered anti-depressants a long long time ago, but chose to never take them because I was scared of the side effects... But now feeling all of this I want to take them more than ever (thoughts on this?).
I really hope somebody can calm me down, as I've tried to sleep already tonight (from 8-10pm, but had a nap from 2-4pm) and I'm exhausted.. Just want an unbroken sleep. I've been told from multiple people that it's just anxiety, but I just can't seem to believe them for longer than 5 minutes.
Sorry for the essay, but I thought I'd go into as much detail as possible. Thanks in advance.

Growing up, I never really understood it when people say they're in a "good/bad place" and yung sinasabi nilang "demons in my head"--I always thought they referred to temptations only. Until recently.
For reference, I am very socially awkward, not exactly anti-social, just very very awkward. You can invite me to a party and aside from being too lazy to prepare for it, I don't exactly have problems going, just don't expect me to be good at socializing. Nung highschool, I don't exactly have enemies--save for this one guy, but other than that, I get along fine with people. They don't hate me, I don't hate them either. Mejo nafi-feel kong there are people who don't like me and I do tiptoe around them but I really wasn't bullied, in my opinion. Not ostracized either (if they did, I won't know, but I don't think they did).
Of course, minsan may discussions and disagreements, but focused kami masyado sa pagsstudy so I don't think I had major conflicts with others. I don't have anything to complain much about them. Baka insensitive lang talaga ako so I often just get confused kung bakit may nararamdaman akong "aura" minsan na parang ayaw nila sakin, pero di naman nila ako explicitly inaaway and they're far too busy to backstab me just as I was too busy to mull over it. That's not to say wala akong friends--there were a few--but otherwise walang toxic eme. I can go around talking to people from different circles. Civil lang, ganun.
Same thing during college. Though I admit mas gusto ko yung college days ko kasi I genuinely like my course, and naturally, if you love what you're doing, other peoples' opinions don't really matter much to you. College was stressful, but far more fruitful. That was the time I realized what "friend" really meant, because I don't think na-orient ako nyan growing up. Di ko alam kung autistic ba ako or what, but when I was a kid, ako yung type na di nakakaintindi when other kids say "panget" or "maganda", ang nagegets ko lang is negative/positive sya based on the way people said it. Like, kung sinasabi nila "ew, maganda" with a disgusted face, I would think it's a bad word, ganern. As far as paano nasasabi ng mga tao na "panget" o "maganda" ang isang bagay--I didn't understand it. Basta yung mga adjective na masyadong subjective and abstract, I could not comprehend it.
Ngayong matanda na ako, of course I do understand those things, but that's just one example. There are still times na caught off-guard ako minsan kasi I don't understand how people can tell things apart.Same thing sa "friendship". I never really understood it, and I didn't understand why some kids would rather hangout with friends than rest at home and read books--my hobby. I just chalked it up to maybe yun lang talaga nagpapasaya sa kanila, but I didn't know why you needed a friend.
Di ako na-orient nyan as a kid. The girl na kapitbahay namin na I thought was a friend would one day play with me and we would be happy but the next day, she'd be mean and would laugh at me from their doorstep and when I ask if maglalaro ba kami, she would forbid her siblings from doing so. She switches from these modes often. It always felt like it was my fault by the way she looks at me and hates me, pero always akogn clueless. I don't thnk I cried or was saddened by it, but I remember being very confused every time she switches back and forth from being the Ate I could play with to being unreasonably mean. I would ask why but she will never answer and will snub me instead. Ako, helpless, would just be confused but helpless so I'd go do other things--like playing that old coin-operated Super Mario game machine or just going back home to read. I was never sad about it, but confused and frustrated, yes--frustrated kasi di ko magets kung bakit ganun nangyari. That for me was a "friend" so I really didn't think I needed one, because I figured people could be whimsical--one day magkasundo kayo, the next day, for some reason hindi na kayo friends. Ganun din parents namin eh.
Even "pakikisama" is such a foreign concept to me. Nung naging teenager ako, anime was the only thing from which I remotely learned about socializing, including paano maging reasonable and stuff. Being a mahirap na Filipino, realistic tayo by nature, so di naman ako nagka-chuuni syndrome. 😂 But I learned to appreciate emotions and people around me--specifically my family. When I was 12, my youngest sister was born. That was the time I realized what the word "cute" meant--literally; because just like panget/maganda, I also did not understand "cute" until I saw my baby sister. Ganun pala yung feeling makakita ng "cute". That was also the time I felt something na di ko maexplain, I just know na I decided I wanted to treasure this tiny little human blob. Perhaps I felt the same thing with my younger brother when he was born all those years ago, but that time, I was still a toddler myself so I was more jealous than happy hahahaha (hey, I love my brother, but when we were kids, we'd be at each other's throats due to early childhood rivalry, lol).
Anyway, sorry masyadong mahaba yung segue lol, basta the idea is, I have A LOT of things I don't know when it comes to interacting with people. Masasabi mong EQ = -1 ganern. This means I'm bad at talking. (Sa hinaba-haba ng post na to, di pa ba obvious?)
Chatting is just as hard. For some reason, I have grown to be very opinionated as well, so there will be times na I could go strong with my opinions. I've always been aware na perhaps I'm just wrong because there's an underlying connotation or social context clue na nami-miss ko. But when you're an adult, people expect you to have known things like that already--well, no I don't. I am aware na maraming mga tao who will find people like me who "can't read the atmosphere" irritating. The best I can do is just stay silent once I notice na I ruined the mood for everyone.
Seriously, I just wish there's like a manual for interacting with people. I even wanted to join etiquette classes so that I don't make people uncomfortable (pero wala tayong cash, bes, so tiis2 na lang tayo sa pagreresearch online).Rest assured, I am trying to hold back bombarding chat groups with my strong opinions (like for example mga issue ng mga artista). I'm not a know-it-all, that's for sure, but maybe the way I say things kind of give that vibe? Minsan pag may shine-share sila na link ng mga controversial posts, pinagkakatuwaan nila, but when I try to say the same things, they all go silent and it seems like I didn't have the right to say it?
Well, whatever the case I'm obviously still not doing good enough sa "pakikisama" portion. Baka awkward lang sila sa akin because I do tend to come off strongly with my opinions. I'm really bad at conversations except when it's work. But this isn't really the problem I'm worrying about. I know my friends aren't that shallow (ffs, we're too old for drama), and we do get along when we find a subject we can all relate to (the convo could go on until madaling araw). So it's really not that bad.
The problem I'm facing right now is that these things are haunting me these days for some reason. Up until a few weeks ago, I never had breakdowns and I felt content. Maybe I felt a little bad about my weight but I was otherwise okay. However, recently, I am having thoughts of how inadequate I am (for reasons I have narrated above, mostly about being socially awkward). It just so happened na quiet ang gc namin lately and somehow (despite this happening many times in the past, because we're kind of low-maintenance as a friend group) I felt like my presence was not needed which I think isn't really true, because these girls, despite being sarcastic to things on social media, were never mean to me. If there is anything, they are the type to say it to my face or will calmly advise me.
Like I said, I know they are not like that, but lately, it's like a little voice keeps telling me I'm not needed. It's not just about this gc either. I'm starting to think I might be underperforming at work kahit na I KNOW FOR A FACT I AM DOING VERY WELL at it. I even get thanks from the client sometimes! There's also the thought na baka I'm not being a good daughteate because I feel like I'm getting more toxic by the day, but I know that my sister and my mother don't feel that way.
Naiisip ko rin na maybe yung reason kung bakit wala pa akong boyfriend/partner is because there's something about me that males don't like. I'm kinda convinced that if I had a partner, they would cheat because I'm just not perfect (the ex did cheat). And I know that not all men cheat, but I think there won't be a decent guy my age (yung hindi red flag) who would take me--all the good ones are taken or married at this point, and the rare ones who are still single probably won't like me either. Pero sa totoo lang, kahit na I feel lonely, I honestly don't think may oras ako for that kind of relationship and wala akong boyfriend because yes maybe I am difficult to be with but I also don't go out and meet new people so malamang noh, wala tayong prospect. Anyway, I'm at the age na focused ako sa work, so di talaga big deal na wala akong jowa (mostly because choice kong magstay sa bahay).
But for some reason, since last week, bigla na lang na I'm feeling bad about myself because of these things. Always na lang akong may napupuna and I'm constantly thinking na kasalanan ko lahat. There's this stupid little voice that keeps saying that I'm useless, that the world is better off without me. And it's weird because I am sure that's not true. I may not be the best person in the world, but alam kong may iiyak when I'm gone; at least my sister would. I could not do that to her kasi may history din sya of trying to cut her wrists back then. The reason umuwi ako from working in Japan is largely to prevent that from happening again. She's come a long way now, and she can express herself as well. She's still very considerate of others (unlike a certain someone) but she at least now knows how to say "no" when she doesn't like something. She can now criticize as well! 👏 She's now confident of herself and no longer hides from the camera, she's even dressed up very beautifully and enjoying their graduation ball now as we speak! Anyway, I cannot bring her such grief now na magco-college na sya.
Di ko talaga alam kung saan galing tong mga negative thoughts na to. I feel like a wreck even now as I am writing this. Minsan, pag ako lang mag-isa, naiiyak ako bigla. I keep reminding myself that all those negative thoughts are just me overthinking things again (I had a history of chronically overthinking). Ang naiisip ko lang is baka yung slimming coffee na I started drinking ko is making my brain hyperactive that I'm now having these self-deprecating useless thoughts na di naman talaga totoo. Sabi nga nila, "An idle mind is the devil's workshop." I never really understood that until now. Baka sobrang bored ng utak ko na kahit ano na lang iniisip neto? Do I need a new hobby? Ito na yata yung sinasabi nilang "demons in my head", kahit anu-anong bullshit na lang pinagsasabi.
Yung coffee, ininom ko lang sya kasi I felt like I have been overeating. I've been over eating for years by the way (maybe 5 yrs now?), to the point na there were nights where I ask my sister "Ano kaya masarap kainin bukas?" while we are on the bed, trying to sleep--ganun kalala bes. Napapadalas na rin yung pangangasim ng tiyan ko sa dami ng kinakain ko, so I decided to find a way to stop overeating. Admittedly, na-curb na yung appetite ko with the coffee. I still eat regularly, just not as much. Di rin laxative yung coffee, di naman ako napapatae eh. It does dehydrate me more often (which means I have to drink more water) and I feel light headed after drinking it. I did stop drinking it for a few days, but the negativity didn't go away.
Anyways, I'm not sure if it's the coffee. Regardless, I have to make sure na kahit anong factors pa yan, I want to stop thinking negatively about myself like this. Once may ni-share yung friend ko sa gc namin. Kung may negative thoughts daw, either kelangan mo lang kumain, mag-exercise or maligo. I'm doing those. I feel like kelangan ko lang talaga ifocus yung attention ko sa mga mas importanteng bagay rather than this shithole, but I also don't want to burn myself out. I just probably need to be genuinely happy with myself to get rid of this negativity.
I cannot tell my friends or my family about this. I don't want my friends to go "here she goes again" and burden them. They are MY friends, I've already unloaded a lot to them over the years, so baka mamaya sila na yung ma-overburden. As for my family, as much as I love them, my parents unfortuantely cannot help much in that department. They're very strongly opinionated, and it will just be a long narrative of "you know, back in my day" and the conversation will then become about them--either that or if they're in a bad mood, they'll angrily ask me "what do you want me to do about it?" Hindi uso yung weak-minded sa kanila. Don't get me wrong, my parents did their best to raise us and frankly, they did awesome, but they themselves are also struggling to be happy. I cannot give them one more thing to worry about.
Sorry, this has been a long post. I'm just actually trying to yap away to dissect my thoughts. I'm glad we have this platform where I can write anonymously. Writing does help out a lot in organizing thoughts after all. Now that I've written this far, the rational part of my brain has some solid ground it can use to fight back against that "voice". I thought about private journalling as well, but somehow, I want people to read it too. Perhaps it's a narcissistic tendency? It's anonymous anyways.
If ever I have episodes of feeling badly about myself again, I hope I can read this and remind myself that I am not what those voices say I am.

With regards to choosing the main foundation where your youngster will accept their initial training, your choice will have an effect into the indefinite future. In the UAE, there's such a huge amount to browse, and to make it more straightforward for you, we interview a portion of the veterans of the UAE nursery scene for a manual for your kid's initial step.

Educational program

"Guardians ought to initially get to know the various educational programs offered and their interesting ways to deal with learning"
"As a family, you then need to limit your choices in view of area, cost and hours as a subsequent step."
Leads Early follows the Early Years Establishment Stage (EYFS) program in a Montessori school climate, a typical educational plan utilized in UAE preschools.
"I sincerely have faith in the EYFS, an educational plan that is likewise utilized in Britain. It has seven areas of learning and functions as a structure for our instructors to screen, track and access a kid's advancement, guaranteeing the homeroom and exercises cover all areas of learning,"
"Is it an extensive educational plan that sets out the essential data and direction for setting up a program, or a structure that permits instructors/facilitators to make the educational program? Is there proof of the educational plan's viability when carried out well? Are assets accessible to help staff in executing the educational plan?" she makes sense of.
Beside educational program materials, guardians ought to likewise really focus on the qualities it elevates and exercises joined to it. While certain nurseries will zero in on play-based learning, others might pick a more primary methodology - and both would be following a similar educational program.

Climate

Most guardians search for a climate where their children could feel great, however what makes a decent nursery setting?
"Nursery conditions ought to be welcoming, comprehensive, kid well disposed, open and testing, with instructive exercises that empower children to pick their learning,"
"It's implied that they ought to follow elevated degrees of wellbeing and security conventions. Focuses ought to have regions that take into consideration indoor and outside play, as well as ones that cultivate different formative spaces. For instance, a library, rec center, and pretend and tangible corners," she adds.
Homeroom structure is likewise one of the main elements while picking a nursery. "In a Montessori educational program, for example, Leads Early’s, the homeroom is separated into five explicit learning regions and gear is on low-level racks, making it effectively open for youngsters. There's an understanding corner and an easel in every study hall to empower freedom," she says.
"A study hall ought not be excessively occupied or jumbled as it very well may be diverting for youngsters, and there ought to be sufficient room with the expectation of complimentary progression of development. It's vital to check class sizes and the proportion of grown-ups to kids, with clear rules accessible from the Service to lead this,"
The nursery climate ought to be protected, warm, inviting and invigorating, for youngsters, yet for guardians also.
"A catchphrase with regards to assessing a climate is that it should be 'empowering'. It ought to help children's requirements, give open doors, rouse and start interest. Early Training should be exploratory and children ought to enter their homeroom consistently and see new exercises and thoughts,".
"This additional extraordinary learning climate can be conveyed by an energetic and exceptionally gifted instructor who comprehends youngster improvement, one who's searching for different ways of broadening learning. I likewise accept that an excellent nursery looks to give a learning an open door at each second and in each discussion. Learning is all over," she adds.

Educators and staff

Nursery staff assume a fundamental part in your youngster's turn of events and schooling, and initial feelings are critical.
"When you stroll into a middle, you ought to get a quick 'feeling' about the spot. Do staff look cheerful? Do they make proper acquaintance and welcome you? Is it safe to say that they are effectively drawn in with kids? At Splendid Starting points, we typically take a visit with imminent guardians at our most active times so they can see staff and children completely inundated,".
"While visiting the office, see how staff associate with children and whether they look satisfied. Address them and check whether they're ready to make an association with you. Ensure you get some information about educators' capabilities and experience,"
"Subsequent to checking qualifications, I investigate potential new educators' fundamental beliefs and measure them against those of our nursery school. Homeroom strategies can't be educated, however warmth, persistence, inspiration and commitment are intrinsic," she says.
"I figure guardians ought to search for nurseries with a low staff turnover, strength inside the supervisory group and great capabilities across all the staff - including support, she adds. "These elements genuinely have an effect."

Educational cost

Perhaps of the greatest variable guardians will consider is whether a nursery merits the educational expenses. Normally, a kid's schooling is, however the foundation they become a piece of requirements to mirror that - and it's no simple choice to make.
"Most Early Years educational plans consider some adaptability, so search for the outcome when a kid has gone through the framework. What objectives have they accomplished in proficiency and numbers? How would they foster individual, social and close to home abilities? Does the nursery offer extra advancement exercises like dialects, music and actual turn of events? Another significant perspective is check the way that they speak with guardians in regards to the kid's learning and objectives accomplished,"
We encourages guardians to pay special attention to an extremely low expense structure, and to not consequently go for the less expensive choice. "Nursery instruction is the underpinning of your youngster's future. The advantages will be not difficult to see when they change with certainty, enunciation, confidence and a major tool kit of mastering abilities. Great nurseries are famous and popular for good explanation," she says.
Abu Dhabi's Splendid Starting points, the more guardians see, the better of a choice they would have the option to make. "I accept guardians ought to visit various focuses prior to choosing which one would be the best fit for their youngster. Informal exchange proposals go quite far, as well. Guardians need to consider their own spending plans while concluding over educational cost rates that suit them best, however be careful - the most costly or present day looking doesn't be guaranteed to mean the best," she makes sense of.
Blossoming Buds' Boulos urges guardians to focus on wellbeing and security. "Whenever needs are set, a reducing interaction will assist with finding the right Early Years setting. There sure are numerous choices to browse on the lookout, which goes with choice making for guardians one piece of the complicated riddle that is their work and everyday life," she says.
"Guardians might need to check locales which have a registry posting of the relative multitude of nurseries alongside their educational expenses, area and surveys. Besides, informal exchange goes quite far, and getting some information about their experience inside a specific setting can assist with the dynamic interaction," Boulos adds. "Pick carefully."

Basically

"Tight down your decisions originally founded on your necessities. Assuming you're working guardians, you would require longer functional hours, perhaps transport offices and nearness to your home would be significant, as well. See esteem presented at the cost: does the nursery give any extra-curricular exercises inside the charges, and are any dinners or tidbits included?" says the Leads Early Principal.
"Search for foundations that have been around for quite a while and have a history. Generally, they're the ones you know about habitually by overhearing people's conversations. The main models would be staff as your kid will be in their consideration, so get some information about their experience, capabilities and responsibility,"
Security is fundamental as well: are there qualified medical caretakers anywhere nearby and is staff emergency treatment prepared? Presumed nurseries ought to have approaches and methodology set up for everything, so request to see them.

This post is written in memory of a guy who couldn't stand this life. His name was Wilkes McDermid. By the accounts of all who knew him, he was generous and kind; among other selfless acts, he was known to often take his friends out for meals and booze at top restaurants and bars before footing everyone’s bill. On top of that, he was a well-known food critic in London and made a high six-figure income.
So he had a good personality, he had status, and he was well-off. He should’ve been successful in dating, right?
Tragically, Wilkes left a blog post before he self deleted explaining his reasoning. I remember reading this back in 2015, and it hit way too close to home as an Asian guy. And when you look at his pictures, you can see even his smile is sad. You can see the grief in his eyes.
https://preview.redd.it/9rwuee11ztka1.png?width=640&format=png&auto=webp&v=enabled&s=a6df0fc867d82d1ff89e9ef961b9cb0543e9ddce
I'm going to share the parts of his blog entry which I'm sure many of you can relate to. Here's the link if you wanna read the whole thing:
https://wilkes888.wordpress.com/2013/02/08/my-final-blog-entry-love-you-all/
"The reason for my death is simple. I have concluded that in the realm of dating and relationships the primary characteristics required for men are as follows.

• Height: above 5ft10
• Race: huge bias towards caucasian and black
• Wealth: or other manifestation of power

From my observations and research it appears that you need two of the three criteria for success with very few exceptions. What does this mean it means that it’s “game over” for me. By choosing to depart early, all I am doing is to accelerate the process of natural selection whilst saving myself a great deal of long term pain in the process."
He was close. If you replace "wealth" with "face," you have the holy trinity of male loneliness:
Face, race, and height.
You could say "oh, he didn't realize money is betabuxx, he didn't include face," but let's give Wilkes some credit here. The guy probably never once visited a blackpill website. Educating himself that much on his own is way more than most inkwells in denial do, let alone normies.
"Think I’m wrong… here’s an experiment…
If you are confident that I am wrong do this one simple test. Every time you see an Oriental/Caucasian couple in your daily life, record how many times it has been an Oriental girl with a Caucasian male and how many times the role is reversed. If there is no bias (which I am constantly told) then I expect to see a 50/50 split of Caucasian Male/Oriental female couples verses Oriental Male/Caucasian female couples. I originally performed this test 5 times and found approximately a 95% skew of Caucasian Male with Oriental Female couple. I was told that this sample set was too small so I performed the same test over four to five years until I reached the sample size of 10,000 in total split into tranches of 100. Every time the answer effectively remained the same. All the samples lie between a 94% bias and a 100% bias. This is also clearly reflected in the study performed on the databases of OK Cupid Dating and Match.com dating agencies (sample size 10 millions new users)."
Goddamn. This guy was running his own tests. He was using confidence intervals and shit.
I'm impressed, what can I say?
My bro counted interracial couples he saw in real life. That's how much he was dedicated to the science.
"To everyone who says “why don’t you just accept it”, I ask you this. What if your girlfriend/boyfriend/wife/husband was taken away from you through no fault of your own? How would you feel? What if you were then told “it doesn’t matter, just learn to live with it”. Then what if you were told, “it’s your fault, it’s your personality that has caused that” and “stop being so negative”. How would you react. That’s what I’m faced with continuously. I can’t stop people lying to me for the rest of my life… but I can control how long my life will be and therefore how long I will have to suffer.
Goodbye, I wish you all the best"
Now, I'm sure many of us have been there mentally at least once, considering the rope. But the mistake he made was associating with normies who told him all that bullshit. He should've talked to other people who go through what he did.
Wilkes was the complete opposite of a misogynistic and hateful mass murderer. His life wasn’t an attention-grabbing headline. The horrific actions of Elliot Rodger, whose legacy lives in infamy, are a stark contrast to the generosity of this kind man who was beloved by all who met him. The thought of going ER would probably have never entered Wilkes’ mind. Maybe that’s why many of you have never heard of him.
But you gotta feel for the guy. Going through life alone is brutal. No amount of friends, status, money, or even food was enough to make up for Wilkes’ eternal solitude. And keep in mind that he was 40.
Imagine being 40 and never having someone in your life. Never having someone attracted to you.
Many of you guys are in your teens and 20s. You guys are still young. Realize that being an inkwell at 20 is one thing, but being an inkwell at 40 is completely another.
And that was his reality.
I hope he found some peace in his last moments.
Rest in peace brother.

Introduction: Cataract surgery is a common procedure performed to restore clear vision in individuals suffering from cataracts, a condition characterized by the clouding of the eye's natural lens. Delhi, the bustling capital city of India, offers a wide range of healthcare services, including renowned ophthalmologists and eye surgeons. In this blog, we will explore the topic of cataract surgery in Delhi, with a specific focus on the expertise of Dr Rajiv Bajaj, an accomplished ophthalmologist and eye surgeon associated with the Bajaj Eye Care Centre. About Dr Rajiv Bajaj: Dr Rajiv Bajaj is a highly regarded ophthalmologist and eye surgeon based in Delhi. He has an extensive educational background, and his commitment to excellence is demonstrated through his many accolades. With a special interest in cataract surgery and LASIK procedures, Dr Bajaj has earned a reputation for providing exceptional care to his patients. His expertise, combined with his compassionate approach, makes him a trusted choice for individuals seeking cataract surgery in Delhi.
Cataract Surgery in Delhi: Delhi is home to numerous healthcare facilities that offer cataract surgery services. The city's rich history and vibrant modern life attract tourists from around the world, many of whom seek medical treatments alongside experiencing its cultural richness. Cataract surgery is a popular choice for both local residents and medical tourists due to its effectiveness in restoring vision and improving the quality of life.
Delhi's healthcare infrastructure boasts advanced technology and experienced healthcare professionals, making it an ideal destination for cataract surgery. Dr Rajiv Bajaj's association with the Bajaj Eye Care Centre further enhances the credibility of cataract surgery services available in Delhi. With his expertise and dedication, Dr Bajaj aims to provide personalized care and achieve optimal outcomes for his patients.
Procedure and Benefits of Cataract Surgery: Cataract surgery involves the removal of the cloudy lens and replacing it with an artificial intraocular lens (IOL) to restore clear vision. This outpatient procedure is typically performed using advanced techniques such as phacoemulsification, which involves using ultrasound energy to break up the cataract. The benefits of cataract surgery include improved vision, enhanced colour perception, reduced dependence on glasses or contact lenses, and an overall improvement in quality of life.
Why Choose Dr Rajiv Bajaj for Cataract Surgery? When considering cataract surgery in Delhi, Dr Rajiv Bajaj's expertise and reputation make him a notable choice. His extensive experience in ophthalmology, particularly in cataract surgery and LASIK procedures, instils confidence in his patients. Dr Bajaj's commitment to providing personalized care, utilizing advanced surgical techniques, and achieving excellent outcomes sets him apart.
Bajaj Eye Care Centre: Bajaj Eye Care Centre is a speciality hospital providing high-tech quality eye care services, Established in 1996. Bajaj Eye Care Centre is NABH accredited which is the highest Indian accreditation standard to provide quality health care services. It is registered with the Directorate of Health Care Services, Delhi. It is also empanelled with various Governmental, Non-Governmental & Public Sector organizations like CGHS, DGEHS, NDMC, MCD, DJB, Delhi University etc. It is also a part of the GIPSA group of Insurance Companies to provide cashless Mediclaim Treatment.
Conclusion: Cataract surgery in Delhi offers a ray of hope for individuals suffering from vision impairment caused by cataracts. Dr Rajiv Bajaj, an esteemed ophthalmologist and eye surgeon associated with the Bajaj Eye Care Centre, is well-equipped to provide the necessary care and expertise in this field. Whether you are a local resident or a medical tourist seeking high-quality cataract surgery, Delhi's healthcare infrastructure and Dr Bajaj's proficiency make it an excellent choice. With his compassionate approach and dedication to optimal patient outcomes, Dr Rajiv Bajaj strives to restore clear vision and enhance the quality of life for individuals undergoing cataract surgery in Delhi. Name: Bajaj Eye Care Centre Address: 101, Vikas Surya Plaza, Plot No. 7, DDA Community Centre Road No. 44, Pitampura, Delhi-110034 Phone: 011-47024919 / 27012054 Website: www.bajajeyecarecentre.com

Does anybody know what 'Service A' would include if I've had fluids and filters changed a year ago as part of a 'Service B'? I've only done about 20k kilometers since then.

Grace Perfumes LLC is a Perfume manufacturing company in Ajman-UAE. We are the manufacturers and suppliers of Perfumes, air freshener, Bakhoor, Body Mist and Perfume Gift Sets. we do Private label productions and also Contract filling services in UAE.
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Is Perfume for Both Men and Women: The general thumb rule is feminine fragrances are associated with women, and masculine fragrances are related with men. Apart from that, there are few fragrances which are cross oven - can be used for both men and women too.
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I hope this is the right place for this, if not am sorry about that. So this is a question from a customer point of view looking for feedback from server perspective. Back in early March my team at work hit a major milestone and as a thank you to them I took them all out for dinner + drinks. Food was great and service was amazing. At the end of the night when I paid for everything I used my corporate card since this was part of the reward for the work we had done. The total was ~$750 before tip. Per company guidelines I can tip up to 25%.
So the issue is that when I was paying the bill it was really dark and I had a few drinks in me so my eye sight wasn't the best and I ended up forgetting to add the 25% tip to the charge. This was totally by accident but I only recently found out that I did this when I was called in to review this charge with one of the bosses. I feel really bad that I did this and honestly I don't know how this happened since I hadn't had that much to drink but whatever the reason it happened.
It has been 3 months and I couldn't even pick our server out of a line up if I had to but I do know where we went out to. What I am thinking of doing is going in there and explain this story to the host/hostess hopefully they can look up who our server was and I make it right with interest or if they can't (which I assume will be the case) I will then tip everyone who is working that day. So from your pov as servers how would you feel about this? Are these good ideas or would a different approach be better? Oh I should mention that for our expense reports I don't need to provide a itemized receipt so I don't have that anymore. I can't just let this go as I can't stop thinking about this and how bad that poor women must have felt after all that work she put into serving us and then getting nothing. I am actually feeling embarrassed just posting this and I need advice on how to best attempt to fix this mess I made. Thank you for reading.

My grandmother was a baby when the coup took place. Her father, my great grandfather, was a tailor in the city. He could be frequently seen debating about many different topics at the main intellectual hangout spots of the time, where there was a very clear left leaning sentiment. He was a member of the workers' socialist party, one of the more mainstream and moderate leftist parties at the time. When the uprising got to the city and the fascists took over he was imprisoned. The charges against him were of political nature and at some point, like thousands of others in his situation, he was set to be executed by a firing squad. He was luckier than many of his friends, because thanks to the testimony of a few people who defended him on account of his kind nature he was spared and set free after a few months of very rough conditions (he already was a skinny man, but in a picture taken shortly after his release he looked like David Byrne in his big suit). Life wasn't the same for him afterwards, he lost many of his clients, and whenever some important political figure came into town he was one of the people who were preemptively incarcerated for a few days. He passed before the return of democracy to our country.
My grandfather was around ten years old when the war started. He lived in a small village in the countryside, where his parents and siblings worked the land. The conflict arrived there later than most places, but when it did its effect wasn't greater than that of a gust of wind, or a drizzle. Several men with rifles came to the village and my great grandfather signed wherever he had to sign in order to avoid problems with these armed soldiers. In this case they were fascists, so my great grandfather became a member of the fascist party to show that he wasn't a threat. The soldiers left and life went on, they kept living in the same small village, working the same land, suffering the same struggles. It was that easy, not the slightest hint of pushback against what would be a military dictatorship that would submerge the country in decades of brutal oppression.
Once a country has a somewhat stable system set in place, I don't know to what extent one political party being in charge rather than another can truly make society better or worse, or if they can at all and it's not just a pantomime where publicity and manipulation of the public have people fighting over unimportant laws while the massive institutional structures maintain course relatively unbothered. Do I really have a part to play in all that? "The left wing is dissolving the social fabric that kept our society stable". "The right wing is going to defund every single public service that involves helping those in need". I really don't know.
When I recently told someone that I didn't vote because I didn't feel like it, he tried to shame me through the words of his grandfather: "A lot of people have died for you to have the right to vote". I didn't have the heart to defend myself and start an argument because I could feel the emotional depth in the way he said it, a depth I understood. I don't know if I'll vote in the next election. I just might. For those who couldn't.