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Hello, spacers!
On this episode: a post-apocalypse shuttle tour, a look at the latest in Earth tourism fashion trends, and a bit of paperwork- …though with some juicy details to be found within. ;)
As always, I hope you enjoy. :)
——
As Y’ggdrasog helped Kate move both herself in microgravity and what little luggage they had packed from his ship to the shuttle, she found herself surrounded by dozens of Collective aliens who only had eyes (where applicable) for her. As he helped her to her seat and got her strapped in, she leaned toward Y’ggdrasog and whispered to him.
“Y’know, I might find all this staring flattering if I had a bit more self-esteem. As-is, it’s just creepy…”
He chuckled as he strapped himself in beside her.
<“In their defense, they’ve never seen a human in person before now.”>
Kate was about to respond when she saw something move out of the corner of her eye, and glanced up. An alien, one of the armadillo-octopus looking ones like Zapaht-Toh- a spaxar-tickoss, she reminded herself- was leaning over her seat from the aisle behind her. They stared down at her as one would stare at an unusual bug under a rock.
Kate slowly raised an eyebrow.
“…Can I, um… help you…?”
<“Sorry to bother you, I just had a quick question; is it true that you humans have an organ inside you that’s full of extremely corrosive acid?”>
Kate’s eyes narrowed in confusion.
“Yeah, that’d be the stomach. A lot of species on Earth have them. …Why?”
The alien dropped back down into their own seat without answering, but Kate could hear them whisper to the alien sitting next to them.
<“Told you! You owe me five credits.”>
Kate shook her head in bemusement as she heard the one the alien was whispering to sheepishly grumbling to themselves. She turned to Y’ggdrasog to see him only just barely holding in his snickering at the exchange.
“This is probably close to what being an animal in a zoo is like. Well, if the animals could talk, and did Q and A sessions, and- …alright, maybe it’s not really much like it, but-”
There came a small crackle over the speakers, sending her train of thought careening off the tracks.
<“We are now preparing to depart for the surface. Keep yourselves strapped in for the entirety of the descent. Descent beginning in three… two… one.”>
And with that, the shuttle lurched as it turned and slowly began to accelerate towards the planet below.
Kate rarely stopped staring out the shuttle windows at the tortured landscape of her planet as the ship descended. She had seen plenty of smoke in the atmosphere and the occasional wildfire from Y’ggdrasog’s ship, but it was another thing entirely to view it all from this close. The ashen remains of past forest fires. The veritable seas of rubble where towns and cities once stood. Highway after highway of derelict vehicles. The occasional roof with things like “HELP,” “OUT OF WATER,” “PLEASE SAVE MY CHILDREN” or “WE ARE DEAD AND THIS IS HELL” painted on them.
It was like watching a disaster play out before your eyes that you’re powerless to stop. A train wreck in the distance, when you’re out of reach of a track-switch to pull to prevent it. A pedestrian too far from you to push out of the way before they’re hit by a car. You can’t stop it, but you can’t seem to drag your gaze away either.
She only realized she had started crying when Y’ggdrasog nudged her, holding out the familiar cylindrical container of silk tissues that she accepted with a grateful nod. He gently put his hand on her good shoulder.
<”The Collective can fix this. It might take years, but we can.”>
Kate glanced at him as she dabbed away the tears.
“Can you guys bring back all the people who died?”
Y’ggdrasog merely remained silent.
Kate pursed her lips.
“Then you can’t fix it, can you? …No one can.”
<”...It is true, we can’t bring back those who were lost. But we can still do our utmost to rebuild, and help those who remain.”>
“At this point, is it even worth rebuilding it? Helping us?”
Y’ggdrasog winced at the bitterness in her voice.
<“…If you truly thought it wasn’t, would you have agreed to come down here?”>
Kate stared at him for a few more seconds before a small smile finally cracked through the emotionally exhausted look on her face.
“…You always know just what to say to pull me back from my bad thoughts, you know that?”
J’Ffrane’s disembodied head floated into view from their seat behind the pair of them.
<“What can I say? He had a simply marvelous teacher.”>
This spurred Kate to laughter, finally banishing her sour mood, if only for a time.
——
As the shuttle touched down, Kate zipped up her jacket and put on the beanie cap Y’ggdrasog had fabricated at her request. The same gray as her Giger-esque jacket, the cap was an artificial wool weaved so tightly together that it retained all the benefits of wool without any of the itchiness associated with it. She turned to see that Y’ggdrasog has just finished struggling his way into-
“…Yiggy, what are those?”
He glanced up at her as he finished fastening the last strap.
<“Just my shoes. …Or at least the closest thing to them I can wear to protect my feet from the cold, anyway. I just wish they weren’t such a hassle to put on and take off…”>
It was all Kate could do to keep herself from bursting into laughter as she stared down at the footwear. For all intents and purposes, they resembled the feet of a duck, albeit a grossly oversized duck with an extra toe in the back. A thin membrane extended between each of his forward talons, presumably to retain warmth between them like a mitten would for fingers, and to top it all off they were made of some shiny, bright orange material.
Y’ggdrasog’s eyes narrowed in suspicion as Kate averted her own gaze, trying and failing to hide her smile as she only just barely continued to suppress her laughter.
<“…What’s so funny?”>
“Uh- well, it’s just that, um… N-nevermind, it’s not important…”
If anything, his eyes only narrowed further as his suspicion reached its zenith, but he had other things to attend to.
<“…Right then.”>
With that, he pulled his own jacket out of his carry-on, and-
With her defenses already weakened, Kate couldn’t hold back an amused snort, much to Y’ggdrasog’s chagrin.
<“Oh, what is it now?!”>
“I- *snrk* …I’m sorry, but that is by far the single ugliest jacket I’ve ever seen…”
Y’ggrasog looked down at the pink, orange, yellow and green (all bright neon) crime against fashion he had fabricated, and winced.
<“…Is it really that bad? I only really had visibility in mind when making it, in case I were to get lost in one of these “blizzards” I’ve read about.”>
“On that front, you are 100% good to go. You’re probably going to be visible from space. I just- …nevermind. Maybe it’ll grow on me.”
As Y’ggdrasog put the jacket on and zipped it up, he looked down at his now-covered chest with disdain and let out a reluctant sigh.
<“Ugh… I know I’ve made fun of lumigogs who never cover up, but I can’t remember the last time I wore anything over my sacs. It just feels so weird! …Still, I guess it can’t be helped...”>
“Oh, chin up Yiggy. You’re a big boy, you can do this.”
<“Doesn’t mean I have to like it. …Now, where did I put those zip-up leggings…”>
As Y’ggdrasog finally finished bundling up, the shuttle came to a stop and parked. The pilot- a large but squat alien in an orange uniform that resembled what would happen if you were to somehow take a malformed gorilla with dwarfism, graft the skin of a rhinoceros onto it, and then give it some steroids for good measure- addressed them one last time.
<“Alright everyone, remember: make sure to always mask up whatever body parts you need to when you’re outside to protect your internal organs, always clean off your clothing before entering any occupied enclosed space to prevent potential radioactive contamination, and most of all, always be on your best behavior!
Each and every one of you represent the Collective, and the governing powers of this particular planetary territory have extended to us the ENORMOUS privilege of allowing us on their homeworld when they are at their most vulnerable. We do not want to give them a reason to regret it! Got it? …Good.
…Now get off my shuttle already. I have twenty more rounds of volunteers to bring to various territories today alone.”>
As Kate and the rest of the first round of volunteers made their way down the shuttle’s exit ramp, she winced at the sudden drop in temperature that brought the occasional snow flurry with it as they exited the controlled climate of the ship and entered the crisp, late-autumn air. Suddenly, she heard a sharp intake of breath from beside her.
<“SPIRITS! How can you people survive in these conditions?!”>
She turned to see Y’ggdrasog clutching his coat closer to himself, his mandibles chittering together under the translucent face mask they had both been issued to protect themselves from fallout. Kate couldn’t help but grin under her own mask at his reaction to the chill.
“Oh don’t worry, it gets much worse from here on out. …In a couple months, you’ll be wishing it were only as cold as it is now.”
<“Ugh… forget the taboo, remind me to print another three coats or so. Maybe then I won’t worry that my algal sacs might crystallize before my very eyes!”>
As they continued down the ramp, Kate looked around at the flurry of activity around them on the runway they had landed on. The vast majority of it was human, but she recognized a few aliens amidst the crowd. …It was hard not to, when almost every human around was giving them a wide berth.
Suddenly, one such alien began to approach them, alongside a human in a military uniform. Kate struggled to hold back her laughter at the alien’s appearance. It seemed as though the Collective contained a species that, against all odds, resembled a stork of all things, albeit with a large blue cranial crest not unlike that of a rooster, and thicker legs that small hand-like appendages instead of feet- opposable thumbs and all. They were wearing a sleek blue uniform alongside several bags hung about their body at seemingly random intervals.
The alien’s auto-translated voice was bright and cheery as they met the new arrivals.
<“Greetings! You must be the first of the rounds of volunteers coming planetside, correct?”>
Kate nodded as the aliens around her made similar gestures or noises of automation.
“Yeah, that’s us.”
The alien’s feathers ruffled slightly in mirth, and the man in the military uniform looked at her with a cold, unamused gaze before speaking.
“Sorry, ma’am, he was talking to the Collective representatives here.”
Kate’s brow furrowed in confusion.
“What?”
“The Collective agents that just came from orbit. He was addressing them. If you’d step aside, maybe head back to whatever group you’re with…?”
“…But I did just come from orbit.”
The bird-like alien laughed (a sound like that of a songbird’s call) before he saw Kate’s expression.
“I’m not a refugee. I came down with Yiggy here-“
<“Y’ggdrasog,”> he hastily corrected her whilst internally cringing. <“My name is Y’ggdrasog, and I can attest that she was aboard my ship for a time.”>
The uniformed man’s eyebrows shot up like rockets in surprise, and the bird-like alien’s feathers puffed out a bit in shock before he found his voice.
<“…It seems a few details of this group were left out of my dossier! I suppose apologies are in order for the misunderstanding. …If I might inquire, how did a human end up-“>
Kate interrupted them with a dismissive gesture.
“It’s a very, very long story. Could we just focus on what we’re supposed to be doing down here?”
The stork alien clearly wanted to ask a million questions or so, but simply nodded.
<“Right, sorry, I just wasn’t expecting- …sorry. Anyway, my name is Migtryl, a member of the Collective’s diplomatic branch. And this is Jack-”>
“Senior Airman Jack,” Jack clarified. Migtryl’s feathers puffed up a bit in embarrassment at this.
<“Ah, yes, right, sorry. I’ll still getting used to this weird ranking system you all use- er, no offense. …Anyway, right this way, we need to get you all registered.”>
Jack nodded and tagged behind Migtryl as the alien led the group over to a nearby tent and began rifling through a set of filing cabinets inside. As he waited for Migtryl to finish up, he turned back to the group.
“We have to be very thorough about keeping track of everyone here, be they human refugees or Collective volunteers. Names, faces, what group they’re part of, if they have any special dietary or medical needs, that sort of thing. It affects everything from how we distribute rations to sending out a search party or two in the event that anyone were to go missing from the fort.”
Kate cocked an eyebrow.
“How often does that happen?”
“More often than I’d like. Usually it’s just people getting delayed on their way back from scavenging runs, or someone going for a walk and getting lost. Other times, well…”
He pursed his lips, and his next words were somber in tone.
“…There’s one less mouth to feed.”
An awkward silence ensued for a few seconds before Migtryl came back bearing a holo-tablet.
<“Right, this should only take a few minutes. Just pass the tablet around.”>
He went to hand the tablet to Kate, but she motioned to her broken arm.
“Uh… do you have a table or something around here I could set it on? I can’t hold it and write at the same-”>
<“Ah, not to worry, not to worry. I’ll just hold it for you!”>
Kate went to protest, but closed her mouth and let out a defeated sigh, averting eye contact.
“Fine…”
Migtryl balanced on one leg and held out the tablet for her with the other. As Kate activated her visor and began to fill in the various blank portions of the interface with her good hand, Y’ggdrasog peered over her shoulder- hard not to, when one only had to glance down to do so at his height.
<““Katherine Alba Olson-Davis?””>
Kate took a break from filling in the blanks to swat him on the arm quite a bit harder than the more playful ones before now (though he still barely felt it), earning a rather concerned glance from Migtryl. Her next words to Y’ggdrasog came as a harsh, VERY irritated whisper.
“Do not call me that. I’m Kate. Not Katherine, and DEFINITELY not my full name!”
As she finished up writing and Migtryl passed Y’ggdrasog the tablet, he saw the familiar sight of Kate’s good hand going to clutch her nanite cast. He connected the mental dots with ease.
After filling his information in and passing the tablet to the next person, he turned to Kate.
<“…Your parents called you Katherine, didn’t they?”>
She bristled at his words.
“For the love of- …Yiggy, I’m warning you-”
<“Ok, ok! I’ll drop it. …Sorry…”>
As the last of the group finished, Migtryl bobbed his head up and down in approval.
<“Excellent! Now, if you’ll all follow behind us, we’ll lead the way to the fort.”>
With that, he turned and began hopping along towards the edge of the base with Jack in tow.

I posted this in prorevenge and was requested that I also put it here. Enjoy.
Buckle up, because this is a long one, but I'll put the TL;DR at the top to save you some time.
TL;DR: My mom thinks she's entitled to see my newborn son whenever she feels like it, on her schedule. Copped a major attitude when I told her that she can't visit during my FiL's short time with him, and wouldn't compromise when I offered her a better time when her other daughter and granddaughters will be visiting from out of state. I snitched her out to my aunt and grandma, mom said on FB my sister and I were keeping her away from her grandkids, we all clapped back with proof.
My mom(56) and I(26f) have never had a good relationship. She's a narcissist, chooses men over her own family, and acts like her kids are an embarrassment and a burden. I am the youngest of 3, and all of us are polite, law abiding citizens that have never gave her a reason to feel ashamed of us. Near the end of her marriage with her ex husband, all three of us went NC, but my older brother hadn't spoken to her in almost 10 years.
I had moved 2300 miles away, looking for a fresh start, and I was finally happy. My aunt, her sister, would give me unsolicited updates on her, and about two years into my new life, my mom's was crashing down. My aunt begged me to help her, and I stupidly did. I got my mom out of her abusive marriage and she had to literally flee in the middle of the night and drive to me.
Not 6 months after she left and her divorce was finalized, she breaks my ((No dating for 1 year rule)) because she's a serial dater and starts seeing this guy she works with. 3 weeks later she moves in with him, leaving half her crap at my place. She lives 15 minutes away
I recently gave birth to my beautiful son almost two weeks ago. He is the best thing to have ever happen to my fiancé and I and we couldn't be happier... Well maybe if my mom wasn't such a brat about everything.
If I had to give a percentage to the amount of support I've received from her during my pregnancy AND delivery, it's like 3%. I stupidly thought she'd be a mom and be there for me during my delivery, instead she sat on the recliner, bitched about how late at night and how tired she is, and when it came to actually pushing, she just sat on her phone playing Candy Crush. Seriously, the OB was about to kick her out, he was so annoyed. Mind you, I had been having non-stop, back to back agonizing contractions for 4 hours and I didn't call her until my water broke and they gave me the epidural for her to come in. Once my son was out and into the world, she stayed for maybe 10 mins and then bounced because she was "exhausted". I didn't engage her asshole nature because I wanted a stress free labor. And that's just the cliff notes version of her behavior, there's a lot more and a lot worse. Oh and to top it off, my son was born (early morning) on her and her boyfriend's 1 year anniversary so apparently I ruined her special day. Because of her "all nighter" that she claims to have pulled, she got a sinus infection and I banned her from seeing my son until she got better.
Last Friday, she got the all clear from her doctor and we planned a 1pm visit on Sunday. 12:30pm she texts me "I'll be by later." I asked her what time she need to reschedule so that my son would be in a good mood for her. No reply. 5pm rolls around and I asked her if she was coming over at all. She said "No, I got an allergic reaction to Poison Oak and my eyes are swollen." Okay whatever, I don't want that near my son anyways. I let her know that my FiL will be visiting this week, but my sister and nieces, her other daughter and granddaughters, are making the 11 hour drive up this weekend.
My amazing fiancé (27m) is from Puerto Rico. He has zero family that lives here. Everyone lives in PR. His parents are going through a divorce after 28 years of marriage. Our son is their first grandchild. My FiL was in the states visiting his extended family when my son was born. He bought a $500+, last minute, one way ticket to see his grandson. It was also the first time I met him. He's a lovely man and even made me dinner his first night here. He wouldn't let me cook for him because I "needed to rest". Like father, like son.
My mom calls me and asks when she can see my son. I remind her that my FiL is here for only 3 days, but her daughter and granddaughters will be here this weekend so it'll be even better for her to come over then.
Oh no, that doesn't work for her. She gets pissy with me, asking why she can't visit during the week, essentially wanting to steal what precious little time my FiL has. She says "I only want to visit for 15-20mins". Yep. That short. She cannot for some reason, bare to hang out with me for more than that or she "gets bored". Everything that I have in quotes are actual direct words from her btw. I ask her why she's being so bratty about this and she says "You know what?! Nevermind! Forget it. You can't make time for me and you're making excuses to keep me away from my grandson." I tell her that she had her chance to see him Sunday, appointment made and everything, I don't know why visiting this weekend would be so hard for her. She keeps copping more attitude and entitlement towards me, and I tell her that I'm done and hang up.
And I'm done. She does not get to dictate when she sees MY son. I even offered her a better opportunity and she acted like a child not getting the toy they wanted. So I told my sister. Then I got the grand idea of ratting her out to my aunt and grandma since my mom loves to put on airs that she's been present in my life.
So I did, and oh boy are they pissed. While I am having a phone call with them, my mom is posting on her Facebook about how her kids are keeping her away from her grandkids when all she does is try to "Support and be there for them". Of course her friends are commenting saying that "millennials these days think they can do whatever they want and not think about other people's feelings" and "So sorry they are treating you this way. You are a wonderful woman, and you deserve to see your grandbabies, file for visitation under the grandparents rights" ACTUAL COMMENTS.
And we let them know the REAL truth of how great of a grandma my mom really is. And I mean me, my sister, my aunts (because now both of my mom's sisters are involved instead of just the one), my fiancé, and even my brother who at this point went from NC to LC with her through association with me, all commented and told her friends the real truth, with screenshots to prove it.
Now she's been crying and saying her friends are calling her fake and that I've ruined her social life. My grandma called her and told her that my grandpa would be ashamed of her if he knew how she's been behaving.
Don't paint me and my sister out to be the bad guy when you are the one who put yourself in this position. Maybe if you were actually the great mother and grandmother you pretended to be, we wouldn't be here.
So did I snitch? Hell yeah I snitched. I'm a mother now and I will NEVER be like her.
((In case anyone is wondering why I kept giving her chance after chance... She's my mom. All I ever wanted was my mom to love me and be my mom. My dad died tragically when I was 7 and I have felt like an orphan ever since. I've been a burden to her and all I wanted was her maternal love.))

I like Orcust but i know a lot of people here hate it and how consistent it is at setting up a board with 3 backrow and destruction protection. So here's a Crusadia deck that so far for me in the WCS Qualifier event, has been beating a lot of Orcust decks and keeping up with their BS with its own BS.

• You dont have to copy my exact extra deck, the beauty of Crusadia is that beyond needing Magius and Equimax, you can go wild. I just personally prefer all links and running 2 of each because im overly cautious.
• Arboria is protection from destruction, even against things like Dark Hole, so if they dont take out the card that Equimax is pointing to AND have no banishes, theyre screwed.
• Equimax, while pointing to any crusaida monster, has an omni-negate and once its used, again, Arboria will protect from the GY
• Crusadia power should be a 2 in this deck but i only pulled one, which is why i have the Floodgate.
• Reclusia can sacrifice itself or another crusadia monster to destroy any card on the field and a neat combo is using Reclusia's effect to pop a card, then using Arboria to save the Reclusia and keeping the negate fodder for Equimax. Make sure you have more than one Arboria in the grave just in case. Thats why i like Divine Wrath for now, it can get an Arboria in the grave when im in a pinch.
• Maximus is one of the big finshers here. When hes being pointed to by any Crusadia Link monster, he can make any battle damage it causes to be doubled at the cost of that Link monster being the only one who can attack. So using the Kaiju thats in the deck, while Maximus is being pointed to be Equimax, can easily reach 10k battle damage.
• The Kaiju. Any Kaiju will do but it serves for two things. Good monster removal and a damage boost when you summon it to Equimax's arrow.
• The Knightmare Unicorn is there if you brick on Crusadia copies and Topologic Bomber Dragon is there in case things get hairy and the opponent manages to put the game at a stall, or you cant get over a monster with just Equimax and need to clear the board.
• You have a quick-effect omni-negate, protection against destruction, 2 strong interrupting negates, damage boosting on steroids, omni-destruction, a banish and a stronger form of Lance in the deck.
• https://imgur.com/a/Px4475e

The President smiled at us from his pedestal in the sky - there, in a distant capitol where the long angular shadows of buildings loomed over you like hungry giants. He smiled upon us with an air of enduring dignity, and the two rows of white teeth glinted on the cheap, plasticky material his portrait was printed on.
I bet his house is air-conditioned, I remember thinking to myself as the sweat on my back glued the fabric of my uniform to my skin. During the early afternoon, the stuffy homeroom classroom of my sophomore year felt like the inside of an oven - a crematorium of sorts - and smelled nearly rotten with sweat, body odor, and the excrement of the bats that dwelled in the trees of the school grounds. I went to a public school - not the well-funded, big city kind that even the rich kids went to sometimes. No, I went to a public school in a village that was mostly fields and forest, tucked away from the rest of the province behind steep hills and trees that clawed their ways up to the skies.
There were barely a thousand of us living in the village, so it came to no surprise that our school was underfunded. The single, creaking ceiling fan that tried its best to keep all thirty two of us comfortable during the equatorial summers was enough proof of that. High school - a time spent mostly praying for rain that wouldn't come the entire afternoon - is a thing of the past now. I graduated six years ago - the discomfort of humid afternoons in that classroom now survived only as the faintest shadow of a memory.
I was digging through my second plate of rice, seated before the grainy box TV in the common area of my boarding house when Sarah, an old childhood friend, called me. From ages six to sixteen, I can count on my fingers and toes the number of days when she and I didn't walk to school together. "Remember our second year classroom?" she asked me on the phone, "It burned down last week. I was wondering if you were free this weekend - they still haven't gotten around to cleaning it. Maybe we could all chip in and help get it in order again? No, the other classrooms are okay."
Looking back, it seemed as though the news barely disturbed me at all. If anything, I was annoyed at the fact that I had been interrupted in the middle of dinner. I considered the invitation, however briefly. There was nothing for me to do that weekend - I had no work. All I did was lie in my little bedroom while a fan blew hot air in my face. I didn't want to spend my weekend like that, so I agreed.
The trip from the city I worked in to the little village I grew up in was not a particularly scenic nor dramatic one. I spent most of the one-hour commute sleeping in the bus with my mouth hanging open, and when I arrived I wasn't greeted by a band of family members who were surprised, but ultimately overjoyed, to see me. I still came back home every other weekend to save up on a few meals and to gain some much-needed freedom from all the noise.
It was the arrival of Sarah, and the rest of my batch, that was met with warm smiles and open arms. Some of them hadn't been here since they were whisked off to college, and a few of them had flown back from their jobs abroad to lend their aid in our little act of charity. Meanwhile, I stood there, observing, and occasionally offered a cordial handshake or comment about how much this and that had changed.
I felt myself shrinking inwards as everybody talked about how much their lives had changed since they left our village. I can kid myself into thinking I was free - I found myself a job at a call center in the nearest city - but I was still very much a part of this awful, mind-numbingly dull village. Nobody really asked about what I did or where I worked. It was almost as if they could smell the sour, sickly rot of my stagnation - like a waterway clogged with sewage and dead rats - from miles away.
Still, the excitement of being there overpowered the self-pity that welled deep inside me, and I soon warmed up to my peers as well. We were all invited to dinner at our barangay captain's home, and one of our old teachers, Miss Lubayo - who was now married, and legally a Mrs. - came to say hello. The evening was a pleasant affair, and sleep came to me softly much later that night.
Our little "clean-up drive", as we decided to call it, started at 6:30 a.m.. We came dressed in jogging pants and long-sleeved shirts, with sun hats and several gallons of water loaded into the back of an old pickup truck. There were only fifteen of us, but we were all eager to start the task of hacking down the weeds surrounding the classroom.
Our old high school was small - if you're picturing it now, I need you to think even smaller.
It consisted of two buildings - one L-shaped main building where the shared principal's and faculty office stood in one end and the common restrooms on the other, and a smaller, newer building that was perpendicular to the school's main gate.
Separating the gate and the buildings was a small school yard - a field of unkempt carabao grass pocked with puddles of dark brown mud - where the flag pole stood right in the center.
The old classroom, the one that burned down, was in the second, smaller building, on the end farthest from the gate. Miss Lubayo tagged along, and during one of our water breaks we asked her exactly how the fire started.
"Well," she began, "do you remember Manong?" My first instinct was to ask her which one, and then I remembered that she was talking about a very specific Manong - one we all remembered. He was the old school janitor.
My first impression of him when I was twelve was that he looked so much like a tree - his arms were thin, dark branches that ended in the twigs of his knobby, rounded fingers, and his skin had the withered, leathery quality of someone who had spent his days working in the sun. I mean all of this with no prejudice, as my parents' skin had looked similar as they aged, after years of toiling for me and my siblings to live well. Our school was small, so I ran into him often. He was quiet - and moved around with the imperceptibility of a ghost - but was pretty hard to forget.
"His life has been very difficult - it's complicated and I don't think we have the time. I only heard this story from rumors - he never did tell us much about his life from the start…" she was beginning to trail off, so she pulled herself back for a moment, before continuing:
"Anyway, his life got difficult, they say. His wife died of a stroke, his son died in a motorcycle accident -"
Sympathetic Oh dears and Oh gods rose up in whispers, momentarily interrupting her, and when everyone had the chance to interject, she resumed: "He was quiet before, but then he got quieter. He stopped greeting us in the morning, stopped volunteering to do things - it's the small things, you know. We tried cheering him up - tried talking to him - but…"
He tried setting the school on fire, apparently. His nephew, who moved in with him after the death of his only family, showed up in tears to the scene of the crime the following morning. "He got drunk," he told them breathlessly, "He threatened to set the school on fire, he said he got tired of everyone minding his business. I thought he was just drunk, and raving - he's old, you see - so I got him into bed and thought he'd just fall asleep."
There was something so uncanny about finding out that the timid man who glided through the corridors with a mop and broom tried to commit arson in a drunken rage - and yet he did.
The tale ended with him disappearing - it was assumed that he ran away, and was probably wandering the next village with his eyes glazed over, his only connection to reality being the fact that his feet were on the ground.
We were all sad to hear the story, but when the shock died down fifteen minutes later, we started with our other tasks.
The charred remnants of the classroom were covered in soot, dirt, and melted plastic. Chairs lay crumbled and blackened on the floor, and flakes of burnt paper tumbled about in the breeze like feathers. We began to pick up the larger pieces of debris, tossing them into sacks as we went. It was then that I heard a dry, croaking voice from somewhere behind me - it was groaning, or mumbling something. I turned around, facing the old chalkboard. A huge crack appeared along the upper right corner, creeping down towards the center before finally ending just before the bottom frame. Whatever parts of the chalkboard hadn't been burned off looked very brittle, as if the slightest touch could send it toppling over.
The voice was faint, but I knew it came from behind the chalkboard. I hesitated, looking back to see if anyone had heard it too. Nobody seemed to - maybe it was too faint for them to hear.
I stepped a little closer, if only to hear what it was, "...may their harvest be little, and their children grow sickly. May their pockets run dry…"
More wishes for misfortune were uttered, solemnly. My breath hitched as I tried to step backwards, but the temptation of having my curiosities granted was too irresistible. Instead, my body drew nearer to the source of that demented prayer.
"May their women be barren, and their sons and daughters full of hate…" Instinctively, I dug my fingers in between the cracks of the chalkboard, and pulled the sheet of burnt wood. It gave way easily, and my heart sank to the ground.
Behind the burnt chalkboard was a frail, thin, burnt body crouched in the small crevice of the wall. It shuddered, as if still alive, its hands clasped together in prayer. The parts of it that I assumed were burnt were blackened, like coal, but the rest of it looked like it was made of wood. It looked like a tree. Then I realized -
It was Manong - whatever little flesh and fat he had was consumed by the fire, his gray hair nothing more but wisps of white on top of his charred head. His prayer came to an end. He muttered an amen as he looked up at me, through jaundiced yellow eyes, and for a moment I felt myself drowning into the vast emptiness of his irises. I tried to breathe, but choked on the air, and fell back, landing on my backside with a hollow, aching thump. From the looks of it, he set the classroom on fire, and tried to burn himself with it too.
When everyone gathered around to ask if I was alright - to see if I was hurt - I could only feel a bubbling hatred rising up my throat - for them, for Miss Lubayo, for the rest of this godforsaken village that would never leave me alone or mind my own business.
*May their sons and daughters grow full of hate…* Would you believe me if I told you that I could still smell damp, burnt wood in my room at night? When I closed my eyes, those deep black eyes with its yellow sclera still leered down at me.
I can sense him creeping behind the thin walls of my bedroom. It grows hotter every night - maybe his fire is drawing nearer.

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Just need to let off some steam, but despite this fight not being the hardest (fuck you Malenia) I guess I just lost patience after her. I have a spirit ash summon and I usually let him fight radagon while I act as support so I can save some flasks for the main event, but that damn lightning bolt. The damn bolt. He'll be beating the hell out of my summon and as soon as I start to conjur an incantation, he'll pull that thing out and do a 180 degree turn and throw it at me before I even let out an attack. Whats causing him to switch targets like this? I'll be halfway across the map while my ash is beating into him and he'll just randomly decide to throw that thing at me, usually right when I start an incantation.
The annoying part is its not every time, so I cant even predict when it'll happen and just have to pray that it doesnt happen when I hit that spell button or drink a flask or just decide to sneak up behind him. I heard the bosses can input read, but thats just ridiculous.
This is just a rant after 100 hours of playing, dont mind me.

So Irida is basically what I have been waiting for, since they started making zones I know many of u have been waiting for it as well Ice type is my favourite and yet one of the weakest types in the game atm, but Irida's kit has lots of future potential, like she will be a great investment unit, a huge value unit to pull. She is sinnoh spirit so all the future special ice dmg dealers will be benefited by her , and the fact that she debuffs special defence and other stuffs, makes me want a BROKEN special ice dmg dealer ,maybe like NC Marnie or even SS Lysandre level So here are three of the most popular ice type mons that could be our broken special ice type. Which one are you all excited for the most? If you wanna add some other pokemons, you can comment down below
View Poll

About us;
New Long term project. We are curently a team with individually experienced players. IGL has experience building long term project. The perivous lineup made it to a few finals in various tournaments. We are currently looking to rebuild a team because as the pervious team fell apart. Our plan is to build a team until we're satisfied with the line up, We're planing on doing a ton prac and tournaments until cs2 comes out. Our 1st goal is to enter various tournaments such as ESEA, SCL etc.....
What We've reached across the past months;
Esea Playoffs x1
Esea open x2
Scl Public x1
Gold esports 1st place
Autority Leag
99 dmg leag
Flyhigh leag
Our Schdule:
Mon: 6.30pm to 10.30pm CEST
Tuesday: Off day
Wed: 6.30pm to 10.30pm CEST
Thrusday: 6.30pm to 10.30pm CEST
Friday: 6.30pm to 10.30pm CEST
Saturday: Off day
Sunday: 6.30pm to 10.30pm CEST
Requirements:
2.6k+ elo
Esea Open/ Open playoffs
4.5k hours+
Available Roles: (We dont want puggers)
T side
1st Entry: I want the entry to play support early rounds to survive late rounds to be able to entry for us in a set structure. No one with ego and can take criticism too.
Rifler: Being able to take map control by himself aswell as take initiative through our the map and can make space when needed to. No one with ego and can take criticism too.
2nd Entry: I want the 2nd Enrty to be able to take map control early round to save utilty till mid to late round. I need the 2nd entry to be able to have good aim and team exp and have the balls to make plays that others wont make.
CT Side
Anchor: A person that can hold down the site when it comes down to it and can also play to survive and not to die. So we can buy time for rotations.
Application:
Fill this form out and I will contact you: https://forms.gle/QM3dsVggWmgFNQtP8
Contacts: ( FILL OUT THE FORM 1st and I WILL CONTACT U)
Discord (Fast Response): Tg#3132
Steam (Really Slow Response): https://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561198407806571/

If (Phil) isn’t your #1 draft pick in a game of build-your-dream-SNL-cast, then you’re insane. [link]

u/cjones6464

He’s great, but I mean Chris Farley?

As someone who watched the show from the beginning (as a kid), then followed along for many years off-and-on, I can appreciate Farley being a strong choice, but man... there were SO many great comedians who came through that door. Truly, I feel like it would take a team of comedians, writers & fans to even begin to figure out some kind of sensible 'dream team draft order.'
For example, consider how many similarities John Belushi had with Farley. To my mind, they were both thoroughly brilliant, innovative, and brought a wild energy that I'm not sure anyone else across the show's history came close to. (Belushi of course coming across more brooding & inscrutable, with Farley more ebullient & innocent)
Or take Belushi's best friend Dan Aykroyd. He was the talented glue guy of his day, able to pull off countless roles to make skits work. Yes, I think I /would/ say Phil Hartman had a little more range, but being forced to pick between the two would be damn tough, having watched both of them not just be the backbone of the show, but really crush it in that role.
And of course, there were so many other killer talents of different variety across the show's history, such as: Eddie Murphy, Bill Murray, Dana Carvey, Billy Crystal, Jane Curtin, Will Ferrell, Tina Fey, Ana Gasteyer, Norm Macdonald, Amy Poehler, Chris Rock, and no doubt, several others who deserve to be mentioned.
Then of course, I'd put some of the frequent guests in that same category, such as Steve Martin, Andy Kaufman, Danny DeVito, etc.
Anyway, in terms of how to even consider drafting such a roster? Maybe aside from pure talent, you'd have to:

• Account for differences between cultural eras and audiences of the day.
  
• Figure out what era the target audience would be. (the past? today? 10 years from now? 50 years?)
  
• Determine what a good mix of team players would be. (no Chevy Chase, please)
  
• What would the key roles be? How about: glue guy, energy person, pure innovator, intentionally awkward person, best impressionist, killer joke-teller, memorable line deliverer, best pure actor. Anything else?
  
• And of course, who best to fill those key roles, taking everything else in to account.
  

What else would be important criteria for such a draft?

Significant note: ONLY MESSAGE ME IF you're 21+ years old (NO MINORS) and from the U.S (due to the difference in timezones past 3 hours). I'm on Pacific standard timezone so I would like to talk with you if you're from CST, PST, or MST. I'm not interested in NSFW, drugs, alcohol or talking about politics either so DON'T contact me if you like those things
What happened to all the people who actually used to put effort into their messages? Seems like most people try to use the 'I don't know how to further the conversation' instead of looking at your posts and delving into your interests or bringing up things about them. I see a lot of people who just decide to stop chatting with you even when things seemed fine or sometimes it can feel like you are the only one actually interested in carrying on a conversation. I dunno about you guys but I don't like talking to others unless they actually seem interested in talking with me and being able to carry their own in convos. I should never feel like I'm everyone's møm, telling people that it feels like I'm the one who's pulling all the weight in the friendship. Friendship should always be a two way street. Both of us should be eager to chat as well as be open to learning about new things and doing fun and engaging things besides always texting.
I want to be able to find people who not only align with my values, but also are respectful, know how to carry conversations, and want to do fun things like play this battle royal I have called cyber hunter, listen to Spotify together, watch stuff on YouTube, or voice chat once we've both established a good connection with one another. I'm not sure what's happened over the years in terms of trying to accomplish all of this. It really doesn't feel like I'm asking for much. Most especially since I know there are people out here looking for the same. I'm someone who loves neverending convos full of deep and meaningful conversations. I don't care for small talk and will no longer feel like responding once it ensues. I like sending and receiving long messages and putting forth effort wherever and whenever I please. If you're not interested in doing these things I really don't see the point in chatting with you
I want to be your everyday friend, where we speak to each other throughout our days and nights (most especially since I'm a night owl). I'm all for listening to you vent/giving you advice/being supportive, but understand I do not want this to be a 24/7 thing where that's all we do. As that would not be healthy for either of us.
Now if this all seems like a plan to you, feel free to take a look at the various other friend posts I've made! I tend to filter people (due to my boundaries at the top of my post) and just in general so don't take it personal. Cuz if you do I will have to report you since I don't care for hate/close mindedness. If you're planning on sending a message make sure in general you're willing and able to put forth effort. I can't work with people who expect me to do all the talking lol

There's a huge debate in the red dead fandom on who is the best gunslinger. Alot always say Arthur morgan, some say rdr1 John marston, and a select few such as myself who say Red Harlow.
Now Arthur Morgan is indeed an amazing gunslinger, his skills presented through out rdr2 is mind-blowing. However I feel that out of the three, he's the least skilled. I think rdr1 John is more skilled than Arthur from rdr2, I'd list why but this post isn't about John, it's about Red.
I'd say this is how I'd order the three in terms of gun skills. 3) Arthur morgan 2) John Marston 1) Red Harlow.
Red Harlow is undoubtedly in my mind the most skilled and dangerous gunslinger in not just the Red dead franchise but western media in general.
The reason why I state such a bold statement is because when you analysis Red Harlows feats in Revolver, you begin to realise how godly he really is as a gunslinger.
First of all, let's talk about Red Harlow when he was just a small child. We see that Reds childhood home was invaded by the men sent from Deigo after making a deal with Nates business partner Griffon, who sold Nate out for his own life. When they surpise attack the home, Young Red Harlow had only just began to practice his shooting with his first ever gun, yet immediately he's thrown into a huge gunfight with no prior training, but despite that Red is just killing all of the men with ease. He had no training with a gun, nor any experience in a gunfight, hell he was a literal child, yet here he is going pop pop pop and making armed men drop. Remember these men are not just dumb outlaws, they were specifically sent by deigo,(a general from the Mexican army) so these men must have had a lifetime of training, only to be shot like flies by a kid who had no training with a gun. Its obvious that Red Harlow was a born to be gunslinger, and it foreshadows his path of becoming the ultimate fighter.
Even when his parents were murdered right infront of him, Young Red went for his father's gun (which was engulfed in flames) without any hesitation or concern for his own safety, and somehow managed to hit Daren with his hand on literal fire. Red Harlow even as a child was so brave and did things that a full grown outlaw couldn't do.
However despite all this praise, Red Harlow was still a child and still needed years of training to become the god of gunslingers that he's known for. Sure enough for the rest of the game, we play Red harlow as a grownup, and instantly we realise how very very skilled and dangerous he is.
Inorder or present all of Red Harlows insane feats, I'm going to make a list of all the batshit impossibility stuff he pulled off in the game. Please keep in mind that all of these events I'm gonna list, all happen within just roughly 2 days of each other, which makes them even more impressive.
First of all, Red Harlow takes on a ruthless gang by himself at Twin Rocks. He had to fight against around 10 armed men, a very impressive feat for just one man. He goes to Widows Patch hoping for some bounty money from the gang he took down, however instead he choses to take down another big and notorious gang that took over widows patch. Red had to take on around 15 armed men in this battle all by himself, again a very impressive feat, especially when you consider that he just took on a gang before this one.
Red then goes on a train to Brimstone, on this train a huge gang attacks the train to rob it. Red has to duel a man before running ontop of the freaking train while killing tons of armed men with ease. He fights of possibly around 60 outlaws all by himself on a moving train all by himself, even more impressive.
At Brimstone Red Harlow then goes off to fight and win against 3 huge gangs with massive prices on their heads, he takes on these 3 very big and dangerous gangs all by himself. For the first one he does bump into Jack Swift who helps alittle for the first gang, but aside from that Red Harlow fights them all alone. While fighting the last gang, he duels and wins against 3 experienced outlaws. He does all of what I've said so far on this list in the exact same day.
That night, Red Harlow causes a big brawl in Brimstone saloon. Red Harlow manages to fight off against huge buff men in the saloon without a scratch on him. Afterwards he then casually takes on another gang of outlaws in the next room, which started by Red dueling one of their men. Again all I've listed so far has happened in the same day.
After Red finds out that it was General Deigo who sent those men to kill him and his parent's, he immediately sets of to take on the entire Mexican army by himself. He attacks a Fort that is guarded by trained solders and wins against a huge wagon that was described by the sheriff as "a fortress on wheels" and he does all this like its nothing. Red did have the drop on him by Daren and was imprisoned in the mine that Deigo owned which was right next to the Fort Deigo. Being freed by his cousin Shadow Wolf, Red immediately manages to escape the mine. By the way, this mine was filled with armed miners, yet he managed to escape and kill most if not all of them.
Immediately after that with his weapons back, he attacks the Fort with Shadow Wolf by his side. Red manages to kill every single armed and trained solider in the Fort, including Daren. And right after that Red went after the Mexican train where he kill tons more of Deigos men and eventually Deigo himself. So let's just pause for a moment. Red Harlow, by himself, has done ALL of what I've said so far in just a day and a half.... what the fuck.
It gets even more crazy when after he kills Deigo, he goes back into Brimstone and signs up for the battle Royal, which is the dueling competition. Red Harlow faces against gunslingers like Mr Kelley, who is actually just as fast as Arthur Morgan. And Red manages to out duel Kelley and win. Please also note that in the book, the Sheriff himself states that "being better than most won't cut it, you have to be the best to win" and Red Harlow was the man who won the duel tournament.
Right after this, Red Harlow with Annie and Jack Swift go after Governor Griffon in his massive white house. This place was armed to the teeth with trained soldiers, and Red just casually kills them all. Red even manages to protect Jack for 2 minutes while he was unlocking the front door, protecting Jack from tons and tons of armed soldiers who are trying to kill Red and Jack.
Ofcourse Red manages to kill everyone and duels the Governor in the end, who is possibly just as fast if not faster than rdr1 John. Red rides off into the sunset with his new scorpion revolver from Griffon, satisfied with his revenge.
Red Harlow, basically all alone in this entire game, managed to do ALL OF THIS SHIT in just 2 days...
Red Harlow possiblely killed hundreds and hundreds of armed men in just 2 days. Red Harlow dueled and won again some of the greatest gunslingers in the franchise, he could kill abunch of men within a second before they could draw leather, he took on the biggest and most dangerous gangs in the series like it was nothing, and he did all of that in 2 days...
Now Arthur Morgans feats and John Marstons feats are very very impressive, however those feats happen within possibly weeks. Red Harlow managed to do so much more in so less time.
Red Harlow has to be the best gunslinger, he just has to be. I'm sorry if this is too long I just wanted to share my opinion on this subject.

... with a caveat.
Only part ones of 2 patter premieres count. So just Welcome To The Hellmouth but no Harvest.
Just Bargaining pt1 and no pt2.
/1. Welcome to the hellmouth (S1). It sets everything up. Heaviest of heavy lifting.
/2. Anne (S3). Emotionally devastating episode that was albeit, a tad cliche. Buffy alone is a unique take and seeing the Scoobies hold the fort was great considering how developed they all became post S3.
/3. Freshman (S4), season four is far from my favorite season but this premiere was solid. They do a good job introducing Riley. The villains weren't really tough but that's fine since the team villain was Buffy's self doubt.
/4. Bargaining pt1 (S6). Reeling from the shocking S5 finale, this one had a good deal of heavy lifting as well. Higher production value was very notable and appreciated.
/5. When She was bad (S2). I dunno, just didn't really wow me
/6 Lessons (S7). Really was in my opinion. Felt too much like saved by the bell: new class
Ugh, accidentally deleted Buffy vs Dracula during format edit. It's above S2. Will fix later

Buckle up, because this is a long one, but I'll put the TL;DR at the top to save you some time.
TL;DR: My mom thinks she's entitled to see my newborn son whenever she feels like it, on her schedule. Copped a major attitude when I told her that she can't visit during my FiL's short time with him, and wouldn't compromise when I offered her a better time when her other daughter and granddaughters will be visiting from out of state. I snitched her out to my aunt and grandma, mom said on FB my sister and I were keeping her away from her grandkids, we all clapped back with proof.
My mom(56) and I(26f) have never had a good relationship. She's a narcissist, chooses men over her own family, and acts like her kids are an embarrassment and a burden. I am the youngest of 3, and all of us are polite, law abiding citizens that have never gave her a reason to feel ashamed of us. Near the end of her marriage with her ex husband, all three of us went NC, but my older brother hadn't spoken to her in almost 10 years.
I had moved 2300 miles away, looking for a fresh start, and I was finally happy. My aunt, her sister, would give me unsolicited updates on her, and about two years into my new life, my mom's was crashing down. My aunt begged me to help her, and I stupidly did. I got my mom out of her abusive marriage and she had to literally flee in the middle of the night and drive to me.
Not 6 months after she left and her divorce was finalized, she breaks my ((No dating for 1 year rule)) because she's a serial dater and starts seeing this guy she works with. 3 weeks later she moves in with him, leaving half her crap at my place. She lives 15 minutes away
I recently gave birth to my beautiful son almost two weeks ago. He is the best thing to have ever happen to my fiancé and I and we couldn't be happier... Well maybe if my mom wasn't such a brat about everything.
If I had to give a percentage to the amount of support I've received from her during my pregnancy AND delivery, it's like 3%. I stupidly thought she'd be a mom and be there for me during my delivery, instead she sat on the recliner, bitched about how late at night and how tired she is, and when it came to actually pushing, she just sat on her phone playing Candy Crush. Seriously, the OB was about to kick her out, he was so annoyed. Mind you, I had been having non-stop, back to back agonizing contractions for 4 hours and I didn't call her until my water broke and they gave me the epidural for her to come in. Once my son was out and into the world, she stayed for maybe 10 mins and then bounced because she was "exhausted". I didn't engage her asshole nature because I wanted a stress free labor. And that's just the cliff notes version of her behavior, there's a lot more and a lot worse. Oh and to top it off, my son was born (early morning) on her and her boyfriend's 1 year anniversary so apparently I ruined her special day. Because of her "all nighter" that she claims to have pulled, she got a sinus infection and I banned her from seeing my son until she got better.
Last Friday, she got the all clear from her doctor and we planned a 1pm visit on Sunday. 12:30pm she texts me "I'll be by later." I asked her what time she need to reschedule so that my son would be in a good mood for her. No reply. 5pm rolls around and I asked her if she was coming over at all. She said "No, I got an allergic reaction to Poison Oak and my eyes are swollen." Okay whatever, I don't want that near my son anyways. I let her know that my FiL will be visiting this week, but my sister and nieces, her other daughter and granddaughters, are making the 11 hour drive up this weekend.
My amazing fiancé (27m) is from Puerto Rico. He has zero family that lives here. Everyone lives in PR. His parents are going through a divorce after 28 years of marriage. Our son is their first grandchild. My FiL was in the states visiting his extended family when my son was born. He bought a $500+, last minute, one way ticket to see his grandson. It was also the first time I met him. He's a lovely man and even made me dinner his first night here. He wouldn't let me cook for him because I "needed to rest". Like father, like son.
My mom calls me and asks when she can see my son. I remind her that my FiL is here for only 3 days, but her daughter and granddaughters will be here this weekend so it'll be even better for her to come over then.
Oh no, that doesn't work for her. She gets pissy with me, asking why she can't visit during the week, essentially wanting to steal what precious little time my FiL has. She says "I only want to visit for 15-20mins". Yep. That short. She cannot for some reason, bare to hang out with me for more than that or she "gets bored". Everything that I have in quotes are actual direct words from her btw. I ask her why she's being so bratty about this and she says "You know what?! Nevermind! Forget it. You can't make time for me and you're making excuses to keep me away from my grandson." I tell her that she had her chance to see him Sunday, appointment made and everything, I don't know why visiting this weekend would be so hard for her. She keeps copping more attitude and entitlement towards me, and I tell her that I'm done and hang up.
And I'm done. She does not get to dictate when she sees MY son. I even offered her a better opportunity and she acted like a child not getting the toy they wanted. So I told my sister. Then I got the grand idea of ratting her out to my aunt and grandma since my mom loves to put on airs that she's been present in my life.
So I did, and oh boy are they pissed. While I am having a phone call with them, my mom is posting on her Facebook about how her kids are keeping her away from her grandkids when all she does is try to "Support and be there for them". Of course her friends are commenting saying that "millennials these days think they can do whatever they want and not think about other people's feelings" and "So sorry they are treating you this way. You are a wonderful woman, and you deserve to see your grandbabies, file for visitation under the grandparents rights" ACTUAL COMMENTS.
And we let them know the REAL truth of how great of a grandma my mom really is. And I mean me, my sister, my aunts (because now both of my mom's sisters are involved instead of just the one), my fiancé, and even my brother who at this point went from NC to LC with her through association with me, all commented and told her friends the real truth, with screenshots to prove it.
Now she's been crying and saying her friends are calling her fake and that I've ruined her social life. My grandma called her and told her that my grandpa would be ashamed of her if he knew how she's been behaving.
Don't paint me and my sister out to be the bad guy when you are the one who put yourself in this position. Maybe if you were actually the great mother and grandmother you pretended to be, we wouldn't be here.
So did I snitch? Hell yeah I snitched. I'm a mother now and I will NEVER be like her.
((In case anyone is wondering why I kept giving her chance after chance... She's my mom. All I ever wanted was my mom to love me and be my mom. My dad died tragically when I was 7 and I have felt like an orphan ever since. I've been a burden to her and all I wanted was her maternal love.))

It only took a moment. By the time Keyaruga opened his eyes… Or, well, what felt like an awakening, either way, he found himself in a realm of endless light. As dazzling as it might’ve looked, it never blinded the man… nor all of his companions, standing in this luminous wasteland.
“Girls! Girls, are you alright?!” The red-eyed lad dashed toward the four of them, trying to give them a warm hug, while the golden egg rested nearby.
“Uh-huh.” Setsuna happily accepted his embrace, and, being the first to reply, she wanted to share her experience, to tell everyone about everything she’d been through, but alas, only she alone could properly pass this trial by redeeming herself in the face of her fallen brethren. Sadly, everyone else was a lot less eager to drop their guard.
“Oh, look, I think that’s over.” Ellen noticed, addressing her sister, who still held her staff in preparation to break into that last remaining dome. But no, everything had come to an end… Now, they only needed to face Caladrius.
“I don’t think we’re ready. We… never could’ve received their forgiveness fairly…” The world-breaking sorceress lamented, slamming her staff into the floor, just so she wouldn’t collapse. Of course, the Hero of Healing came to her rescue, but she just forced herself to stand still. “T-thanks… But… I’m not the one, who needs you the most right now.” The elder princess spoke, pointing to Eve. She stood a few steps away from them, staring into the void.
“Fucking pigeon, I knew we shouldn’t have come here…” The fallen warlady uttered, looking at the queen-to-be, who seemed absolutely lost to the world. No tears had yet been spilled from her crimson eyes; no concerns to those around her were given either.
“How are you, Eve?” The man asked, trying to get closer to his companion, but she merely took a step away from him.
STAY AWAY FROM ME, MONSTER!!!
These words still resounded in his head, tormenting the lad more than any sort of torture could, and seeing Eve shying away from him, filled his heart with so much sorrow, that he barely held his breath still. He had to… Otherwise, he’d certainly cry.
“Eve…”
“It’s alright… I’ve met Yuel, Mero, and Naala… It’s alright, I’ve met… Naala, and… I’ve met… M… Mero…” When the girl finally opened her mouth, she started blabbering the same thing over and over again. Whatever she had to suffer through, it left a great scar in her mind… “M-mom… Dad… W-why?.. Why did you-?..” And finally, she broke. Tears started flowing from her painfully swollen eyes, and the girl finally collapsed on her knees. “Ugh… Uh… UA-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A!!!” And just like that, a loud wail thundered around this quiet space of endless light, the substance that just formed a tunnel made of mystical illumination. A safe passage to the outside world, certainly.
But no, nobody would go anywhere just yet, not until Eve Reese calms down at least. All that the others could do was to wait. Wait and be there for her.
…
A warm sun, a breeze of wind, fresh air under a blue sky – one never misses those things, until they’re devoid of them entirely. Either way, now that the party left that accursed realm, they found themselves at the same valley from which Caladrius sent them on to the trial.
“…” They were silent, all of them, starting with Keyaruga, now carrying the gilded egg on his back again. He was still trying to get over what he saw. Even if Anna indeed forgave him, and had not just gone mad over what kind of ruthless beast her ward became, her words would never leave his mind.
“Easy now.” Setsuna spoke, supporting Eve, as she barely moved her legs. Ellen walked nearby, still unsure what she should do with Organ’s plea. Both she and her sister heard it, but neither could face the man with that. Not now, not when the hero, even though he remained calm and collected, somehow looked even worse than his broken queen.
Then…
“Caladrius.” The sorceress spoke, stopping before the massive ten-meter tall bird. Weirdly enough, the group only noticed her when they were just four meters away from her massive feathered body, her torso was covered with a golden cuirass, painted in purple, along with the beak-plate which served the harbinger of plague as a crown. All of them ultimately aligned their sights with her four eyes. The wisdom of ages was reflected there, but alas, it was overshadowed by what can only be called ultimate arrogance.
“There you are little ones.” The divine bird spoke, lowering her head just enough, so that humans wouldn’t have to look up all the time. Still, even that gesture wasn’t enough for Freia to drop her weapon.
“Et aperire caelum elementa multa…” The sorceress began chanting her ultimate spell. This time, she wouldn’t take any chances. After what she’d done to Eve, this creature had to die! Or else…
“Don’t… do this.” Well, that turn of event wouldn’t please the goddess. And such, the kokuyoku scion broke out from Setsuna’s embrace just to stand between the caster and her living idol.
“Have we passed?” Keyaruga, asked, standing besides the black-winged prodigy. After all, the further development would depend on their result on this test. Or, rather, how the host reacts.
“You sure did. Your methods were… unorthodox, to say the least.” Caladrius replied, giving each of the party a deep scrutinizing look. Her doubled eyes were fixated on Keyaruga, especially. “You, shapeshifted children, I sense a great darkness in you three. And yet, none of you should fear me anymore.” She said with that middle-aged womanly voice of hers, urging Freia to lower her staff already. “No matter, you merely had to prove to me your endurance, erudition, and the power of your will to become worthy of my grace. I care little for how exactly you survived under my plague, and what you said to placate those who came for you. I am actually rather delighted to see such a contrarian attitude with which you passed my test.”
“You fucking should be!” Ellen snarled, ragingly pressing her finger against the shielded beak. “Your trials were impassable for everyone besides us! You knew that! You knew nobody could beat them without wrecking your little salty mumbo-jumbo!” The girl accused the bird, as if she was just some ungracious host, and not one of the mightiest entities in all the continent of Enoa.
“It’s true! Without my power, we’d starve in your city!” The magician added, pushing her sister behind her back. “How many of Evy’s people had to die because of you? You… You know a demon can’t be a hero, like me!”
“They can, we just cannot risk them falling under the control of something...malevolent.” Caladrius argued with a deliberately ambiguous comment. “To reach the heart of my domain, all you had to do was to calculate the logic in the fractal sequence of…”
“Bullshit! There were no fractals! No building was like the rest, so either you’re spitting lies here, or just think none of us knows math!” The little genius interrupted the explanation with another one of her bitter comments. “Oh, let me guess-!..”
“Enough.” The younger princess was then silenced by Setsuna, who covered her mouth with her hand – a radical move, to say the least, but not entirely out of place, when dealing with an overwhelmingly powerful creature.
“Hmm, I like your tenacity, Norn Clatalissa Jioral, but you only saw my domain from the outside.” The harbinger of plague notified her, but rather then proceeding further with the matter of the bratty general challenging her, she turned her head toward Eve, who stood next to Keyaruga. “It has been a long time, since we saw each other, Me-ua. I am glad to see this new consort of yours is much more respectful toward you. Yet somehow, he is even more depraved than the last one.” And just like that, the deity revealed her insight of the first world, Eve’s close alliance with Keyaruga, and how fortunate she was to have him around instead of Cornar. But that wasn’t the most intriguing part of this.
“I know. It’s… been two years since last met.” It was the reply that the verdant woman gave her, that brought to light a terrifically curious fact.
“Eve… you too?” Keyaruga murmured, realizing, that he now had one more dreamer alongside him. The man exhaled in comprehension, his ‘sister’ slammed her palm against her own forehead, Setsuna spotted a new soul to provide emotional care to, and Freia just couldn’t help but… Well, her feelings about this new revelation were mixed at best. She did want to find out what she’d done ‘back’ then, but at the same time, in doing so, she would certainly discover a lot more cruelties done by her hand; especially those directed at Keyaru.
“I need strength. Bless me, Caladrius. And… age me. I can’t remain a child now.” Eve all but demanded. Somehow, she wasn’t just a fearful kid anymore. This time, the Me-ua kahul radiated dignity, she even spoke with the deity as an equal.
“Very well, little queen. You were never undeserving of my grace.” And with that said, Caladrius carefully touched Eve’s forehead with her beak. Upon doing so, a whirlwind of energy, a flux of white and purple, picked up the girl, and enveloped her completely. Looking at it felt so familiar for Keyaruga. After all, this power destroyed and created, ruined one to shape another. All the clothes Eve had been wearing were torn apart, reduced to primal particles, her skin was scourged, and then replaced with one of a tanned tone, the girl’s hair was bleached, and above it – a crown of two pointy horns grew right from her skull. This wasn’t just a girl now – this was a woman, clad in a dress of red and black, the decorative pauldrons of which, as well as golden bracelets, defied the power of gravity itself. This… was how Keyaru met the Me-ua in the first world.
And what had changed in her stat-wise? Well, nothing – that same fifty-fourth level, with which Eve entered the trial, no change in potential, nor any other graph. Except for one…
Level cap: ∞
“Congratulations, Eve. You’re a hero now.” The red-eyed lad praised his companion. In just a moment, she aged by four years. Her face was still young and pretty, her height got only slightly longer, but the proportions made the whole difference. Hips and breasts – they got some improvements, which the healer would never miss.
“I suppose this settles our deal. With this, you can summon me again.” The harbinger of sickly doom graciously spoke to her chosen one. Unlike other gods, she couldn’t just change a person’s entire class. A full-fledged hero didn’t only have the potential for infinite growth, but also provided a bonus of doubled experience for them and their party, the trait that Eve lacked. Still, Caladrius giving her champion an unlimited level cap was a game-changer nonetheless. Nevertheless, there was one more thing to ponder… “Although… you already know the price for my assistance.”
“Of fucking course! You’ll kill her for that, you monster!” Ellen raged, stomping her little foot against the rocky ground, while her sister braced for whatever consequences her sibling’s brutal honesty might cause.
“Forgive her, Caladrius. She’s just… too worried about me.” The lady in red spoke kindly, patting the god’s golden beak.
“Hmm. That is, indeed, relatable. Still, how precious it is to see your former enemies now have become your allies. Is that your accomplishment, little man?” The white bird asked of the hero. Did she try to offend him? Not so much, really. To her, even a draconid of a baffling two and a half meters tall would still be ‘small’. That didn’t make it less insulting, though.
“Yes. Why?” Keyaruga growled, facing two pairs of eyes, with which Caladrius gazed into him, right to his very soul. The healer had a similar power, but being read himself filled him with at least cautiousness toward the deity.
Flare – she was the one, who brought so much pain to Eve’s heart, she scourged thousands, and even if they were revived by Keyaru’s redo, the queen’s memories still held this agony.
Norn – this one lead armies against Tenanulic, her vile strategies were never burdened by human decency or a warrior’s concept of honor. Scourged earth, poisoned wells, hand-crafted epidemics, bribery, and genocide – this little girl was responsible for so many atrocities, that she had broken her own spirit by committing them.
And, finally, Keyaru. The Hero of Healing, who was there to land the last strike on the demon queen. Only Setsuna was completely innocent, just because she’d die from the disease caused by a monster’s rotting corpse, if not for this enigmatic man.
“Eve Reese – it is your call now. What should I do with them?” And so, the white-haired lady was given a choice. Right now, Caladrius could unleash all of her power without asking for anything in return. Even if she herself suffered from fatigue after conducting all those trials, the harbinger of plague could still easily bury her enemies under a pile of toxic ash. Still, it wasn’t for her to choose now.
“Oh well, now we’re screwed.” Ellen chuckled, shaking her head. Freia and Setsuna assumed a battle stance, and even Keyaruga gave the girl a dark glare.
I’m sorry, birdie. But if you endanger my girls, I… You’ll have to see me as I truly am.
The deep silence loomed above them all. One word, one single word could decide the party’s fate. To Caladrius, not only were they outsiders, but also the enemies of her champion as well. No matter if their crimes were mostly erased, she just didn’t really trust them.
But she trusted Eve.
“Bless them, like you’ve blessed me.” The Me-ua kahul asked, smiling toward her friends and the man she loved. The woman absolutely comprehended the power she was given, and yet, there were things, people, little kindnesses, that she could never forget. Not after they helped her to break free from the chains placed upon her in the first world.
“Evy…” Freia muttered with obvious relief. She glanced at Keyaruga, and he looked as stoic as he did most of the time. Did he learn that from Setsuna? After all, she too merely lowered her arms.
“He-he-he-he-heh…” Only one of them nervously chuckled. The crimson-haired princess just wanted this excruciating day to end at last, even if it barely began.
“Oh my! That is quite bold of you to ask.” Caladrius pronounced somewhat mockingly. After all, she was never obliged to reward humans (including demi-humans) just for surviving her challenges.
“Do you refuse?” Eve inquired accusingly. It made the others wonder, what kind of power she really had over the full-fledged god.
“I never said so. It is… different with them. My power is contagious, and only the ancient pact with your tribe allows you to safely enjoy my grace.” The toxic deity explained, now looking at the party with a deep thoughtfulness in her doubled eyes. “We can figure something out.” She added, drawing her beak near the brooding man. “Hmm, you are quite the curious individual, a human, yet, at the same time, something very different.”
“How should I take this ‘compliment’?” The hero wondered, trying to figure out if he was being accused of the many atrocities he committed during his test, or the sheer turmoil that was his sense of morals.
“Take it as your three hearts would please.” Fortunately, though, the feathered doom simply brushed it off by hinting at his modified biology. After all, now that he was under the protection of Eve, there was only one question to answer. “Will you accept my gift?” Caladrius inquired, cautiously watching the lad’s reaction. He wasn’t all that sure than he needed anything else to be complete. Not when he was almost immortal.
“Please, Keyaruga…” And, yet again, the black-winged prodigy asked him, placing her hand on his shoulder. She would never do something like that previously – the little girl was no more, she had changed forever. But, that didn’t dissuade the healer from liking and trusting her, so…
“Alright. I suppose, it can’t get much worse.” The man just shrugged, accepting whatever he could be granted. The lad wouldn’t drop his guard, though. After all, if anything happens to him, it was quite doubtful that Freia could handle this beast on her own.
“Very well.” Aware of this distrust, Caladrius once again placed her beak onto another’s head. Keyaruga didn’t receive a fancy transformation; instead, his left eye got embraced by a gentle purple light. It only stung for a moment, but when it ended, a whole new perspective opened before the hero. Something… intrinsically transcendental.
“Did you just replace… my eye?” The lad asked, trying to figure out what was going on. Barely anything changed… except for the fact that now he saw his own movements from two seconds afar. He was seeing the future…
“Indeed. You are not a stranger to our divine might, so you can handle it.” Caladrius admonished, standing in her full height, just to stretch her neck, as it seemed.
“Is that your power?” Keyaruga wondered, suppressing his left eye. Fortunately, he had plenty of experience with the gift of the star nymph, so it only took him a few seconds to figure out how it worked. That was absolutely necessary; not only did this power drain a whole lot of mana, it also required some time to get used to.
“Mine? Of course not! This gift was born of sacrifice. One feisty demigod gave me his power to me in order to enter my trials. I merely improved upon it.” The harbinger of plague spoke proudly, giving a brief glance toward Ellen.
“That idiot…” The girl snarled, making a sour face. “What? It was Organ! He saved me! Now you have his eye, brother, or… whatever this purple cross on your pupil is.” The fallen warlady revealed, glancing toward the Hero of Magic as well as the rest of the group. After all, if Hawkeye wasn’t there, Freia would only have found her mauled corpse.
“Then, the egg.” Caladrius continued, now tapping her beak against the egg. And just like that, she poured quite a lot of her mana into it, but, just like previously, it consumed everything the bird offered. “You carry a powerful being on your back, little man.”
“Stronger than you?” He wondered somewhat mockingly.
“Indeed.” But the feathered doom wasn’t about to joke about that particular matter. “I owe her a lot, so this is the least I can do.” The god of sickness and rejuvenation spoke with a trace of adoration and… regret. Maybe, that is the true power? To raise others, when you can, so that they may assist you in the time of your greatest need?
“I don’t need anything!” Freia exclaimed when the doubled eyes of Caladrius were now aimed at her. “I just need an answer! Tell me, what’s with my mother?! Is she alive? Can we help her?!” The sorceress asked bravely, her legs were shaky, partly because of the fatigue, partly – the fear of facing the mighty god. Nonetheless, it’s easy to be daring when nothing can oppose you. A standoff against the powerful being is completely different matter.
“Ah, Reeharoze Thalio Jioral! She… is neither dead, nor alive.” The divine dove replied cautiously. This topic lead to many limitations, sealed by numerous and tremendously powerful curses for each deity, who might reveal them.
“Damn! I knew it!” The sorceress snarled, loudly clacking with her teeth. She and Setsuna both tensed, having already faced whatever monstrosity the king turned Buck Tarwill into.
“The best thing you can do for her is to end her suffering in this world.” Caladrius spoke dismissively, lacking any empathy toward some distant mortal, defiled by the power that is the void itself.
“Go kill yourself, if you think it’s merciful!” Ellen snarled, spitting in the direction of the deity. She wouldn’t have anyone defile her mother’s memory, even a god, even if it literally disintegrated her saliva right in the fly.
“Calm down.” Fortunately, though, Setsuna was right there to help the younger princess. She stood between the two of them, but instead of doing anything aggressive, the gray-haired girl just hugged her crimson-haired lover, and guarded her from the harbinger of plague with her spine.
“How can we help her?!” Keyaruga then asked, trying to be a beacon of logic and reason among all of these tormented souls. Eve stood near; she carefully monitored the lad’s movements, reactions, his gestures, and overall attitude.
“You cannot. At least not right now.” Caladrius coldly responded, shifting her heavy gaze toward the man; to be specific – the burden on his back. “But this one – if she desires so, then you might have some hope.” The bird explained briefly. Obviously, nobody among the party was satisfied with the answer.
“We must help them. Please, you must help us!” Even the white-haired queen-to-be spoke up. She already lost her parents twice, and now in assisting Freia and Ellen she saw a chance to ease her own pain.
“I am afraid, my vows prevent me from revealing to you the whole truth, but rest assured, you will find your answer soon enough.” The harbinger of plague and convalescence reassured all of them. Was it a godly prediction of the future? Or something else entirely?
“Then… Then I!..” Freia shook, trying to comprehend this revelation. She now looked at the egg with reverence and craving. She saw nothing but a tool in it, and that didn’t escape Setsuna’s aquamarine eyes.
“Not so fast. It’s Keyaruga’s child (and ours). Don’t put all your hopes on her just yet.” The huntress admonished, still holding Ellen, as she slowly recovered her emotional stability. The ice warrior was trying to save her prodigy from the burden of other’s expectations, but that affected the pink-haired magician only so much.
“Wise words, child of the forest. But just like your claws, they lack penetrative power.” Caladrius stated, and just as she said so, a multitude of small fireflies emerged around the girl. Or, rather, they became visible. These sparks were always there, the spirits of ice, fueling the she-wolf’s magic. Now they gathered around the divine bird’s head, forming something of a halo. They didn’t stay for too long, though, but when they left Caladrius’ side, their gray shine, now infused with the might of the god, now became much brighter, much… colder. “I am afraid; I cannot do much more for your sake, little one.” And with that done, there was only one person, who still remained to be given anything. “Now…”
“Don’t you even dare, you ugly pigeon! I don’t need your rotten power!” Ellen yelled, awkwardly falling out of Setsuna’s grasp. It wasn’t long before she rose up and once again pressed her finger against Caladrius’ gilded beak. At least, she was about to do so, when she pointed at the queen-to-be instead. “If you want to give me something – don’t! Just don’t! All I need from you is to not treat Eve like your glorified snack, okay?! Look, my sister is the Hero of Magic, she can basically do everything you do, but she doesn’t need to eat anyone to cast her spells! So how can you be so entitled to ask for her life?!” The younger princess snarled, as her emerald eyes rapidly shifted between Eve, Freia, Keyaruga, and the divine dove. The latter was taken aback by that passionate speech, unsure if she had to take grievous offence from belittling her might, or outright cackle from this observation. One problem, though – the former had lost her already fragile balance.
“Eve? Are you alright?” Keyaruga asked, catching the black-winged lady in his grip. She was pale, drained, fatigued – this wasn’t just physical weariness, though. The aftermath of the trial caught up with her, now reinforced by the reminder of how terrible a price she’d have to pay for Caladrius’ power.
“Yes…” Eve mumbled, trying to stand on her feet, but the man wouldn’t let her just yet.
“Hold onto me.” He said, trying to be the support for Eve at her lowest time.
“That is an interesting thing to hear from someone like you.” The feathered deity spoke to Ellen. Despite that entire scene, her account with the capricious genius wasn’t paid yet. “At first, you have got my curiosity. Now, you proved to be worthy of my power.” The harbinger of plague added, facing the younger princess now.
“Fuck you! I already said what I need from you, godling!” Still, the obstinate lady wasn’t there to grovel before the glorified dove. She already had a role to adhere to – Norn, Ellen, whatever she was called – was a strategist, a great mind capable of preserving massive amounts of knowledge just by quickly reading it once.
“Creators be merciful, you are a stubborn creature.” Caladrius amused. To her, watching the crimson-haired girl rant was like looking at a overly vocal pup – all bark, but no bite. Not because it wasn’t brave enough, though. Ellen just wasn’t gifted with a strong maw. And that was something Caladrius could help her with. “You are deserving of becoming my apostle!”
“Hah… W-what?” Keyaruga’s ‘sister’ got so dumbfounded, that her head just went round. It wasn’t a pleasant feeling, though, this dizziness made her nauseous.
“You will get exactly what you wish for, and even more, Norn Clatalissa Jioral! Heed me, Eve. I now grant you two chances to summon me without any harm for you!” The harbinger of disease and rejuvenation notified her mistress. It was still dwarfed, compared to what Flare had done, when paired with Gard the Windbreak, and still…
“I… But I don’t…” This little grace nearly pulled the rug out from under Eve’s feet. But again, Keyaruga was there to give her the necessary support.
“And you, princess in name, but no blood, shall be the vessel of my power!” Caladrius declared, turning her determined gaze onto Ellen. Her sister stood nearby, unsure what she should do with that. She knew Norn could be headstrong, at best, even when it came to the things that would benefit her personally. Just like when she refused the offer from her ‘brother’ to age her body to an adult form.
“Make it four usages for Eve, and leave me alone! I don’t need anyone’s pow-!.. Ah!” Right as she was about to start a new scandal with her big mouth, the younger princess rose in the sky, caught by a purple wind from underneath the deity’s giant wings.
“You do not know what is good for you, child!” The god of rot and restoration snarled, as if she was an arrogant petty parent.
“Ghhh!” Freia hissed, waving her staff to break Ellen out of Caladrius’ grip. She succeeded, and Ellen fell in the hands of the Hero of Magic… but it was already too late.
“Oh no… Oh no-no-no-no!” The younger princess frantically shook her head, as her muscles trembled with the newfound strength. It seems, she was no longer a useless child on a battlefield. One would think she’d be glad with this turn of events… But no. “K-Ke… Keya… Keyaruga-a-a! What’s she done to me?!” The girl yelled, reaching for her ‘brother’. He and his lady in red came closer to the girl.
“HOW DARE YOU?!” Freia screamed, accumulating whatever mana she could drain from this lifeless land, even trying to drain Caladrius of it. She proved unsuccessful, though.
“Freia, don’t.” Keyaruga ordered, painting his right eye in the jade hue. He was just about to see something truly majestic.
Race: Human
Name: Norn
Class: Apostle of Caladrius
Level: 52
Mana: 151/151
Physical attack: 42
Physical defense: 53
Magic attack: 67
Magic defense: 60
Speed: 75
Abilities:
The aspect of plague: 1st level
The aspect of revival: 1st level
Skills:
Boost to Mana regen: 1st level. The skill of the Apostle of Caladrius, boosts Mana regen by 5%
Mnemonics: acquired skill. Greatly improves mental capacity and remembering speed.
Grace of Caladrius: skill of the Apostle of Caladrius. Gives boost to the magic learning speed of Caladrius’ aspects by 2x
And also…
Level cap: 66
Potential:
Mana: 115
Physical attack: 32
Physical defense: 40
Magic attack: 51
Magic defense: 45
Speed: 57
Summary: 342
Fascinating! Although Ellen’s potential was almost twice as low as the others’, due to her having no royal heritage, or hero’s status, Caladrius not only managed to bypass the age of fourteen, a standard timestamp for a human, but also pump the girl with more than fifty levels!
“She… has given you a class… And you’re now on the fifty-second level…” Keyaruga spoke with his eyes widely opened. Seriously, in terms of progression, this was an act of pure, blatant favoritism on the deity’s side of things!
And how did Ellen take this gift?
“FUCKER!!! THAT’S TOO MUCH EVEN FOR A JOKE!!!” Oh, she was positively furious. After all, no power comes without a price to pay. “You! Who the fuck gave you the right to do this to me?!” The younger princess dashed in the direction of Caladrius’ beak. She eloped Setsuna’s grapple, passed around Keyaruga and Eve – all for the sake of that one punch! One punch to the head of this pompous pigeon with all of her new might! One strike… that didn’t even break the ornamental barrier around the bird.
“Rest assured, child. You have zero obligations before me. I am not the monster you are trying to make of me. You may think of that as my way of thanking you for helping my followers.” With that said and done, Caladrius once again rose to her full height in preparation for flying away. “I hope this alleviates your worries, little one.” “Farewell, du-na Me-ua (o great demon king). We shall meet again.” And just like that, the massive figure rose into the air. And when she’d done so, a white mist engulfed the deity, in which she faded from view completely.

As you can see above, I am wholeheartedly believe that Jerome Valeska should've been Gotham's only Joker, THE Joker. Many people would agree with this.
But here are my reasons: 1. The 14th episode of season 3 felt like a direct confirmation to the audience that "yes Jerome is the Joker" and that fight at the end should've been the first official fight between Batman and Joker in this universe. 4x16 also proved to be promising with Bruce feeling responsible for everything that Jerome does as he spared his life in the circus, and he did save Jerome. Jerome was even dumbfounded to learn that Bruce literally wanted to save him and Bruce even had a look of pity on his face after Jerome told him how Uncle Zach beat him.
It reminded me of this scene from Batman Arkham Origins: https://youtu.be/fBvynj1Un-o
We could've easily got a scene like this in a future episode, with Jerome changing his mind about Bruce and begins to see him in a different light. At first he would be furious. Why? In 3x14 his sole goal besides killing Bruce, was to break his world view and drive him to become a nihillistic killer like himself with the whole "Gotham has no heroes" thing. Now in season 4, Bruce comes in and acts as a vigilante hero trying to save even people who are irredeemable like Jerome himself. This would make Jerome angry and confused at first because he literally made Bruce into a hero which went against his whole world view. But then he would think about it and see the potential humor behind it all: Maybe if he just pushed Bruce harder and eventually break him, Bruce would actually become a killer like himself. Jerome would've realized that maybe he and Bruce aren't too different: both are orphaned young and ambitious men who try to change the face of Gotham according to their beliefs and world views motivated by their traumas relating to family (Bruce - loss of his parents, Jerome - abuse from his family).
This could've been a great set up to develop the Joker and Batman relationship in this show's universe and story. But no, they had to shoehorn in the Jeremiah twist and kill off Jerome. Absolutely wasted potential.
Also, Jeremiah just came out of nowhere and his existence doesn't make any sense. Like are you trying to tell me that Jerome didn't realize that his brother is in the very same city in which he was terrorizing people? And none of his relatives even bothered to tell the GCPD that "Oh btw Jerome has a twin somewhere in this city" or even the fact that Jerome never talked about him in any of the episodes before season 4?
The show already pulled the secret twin plot twist numerous times and all of them were annoying. Looking at you Kristen Kringle and Isabella.

1. Now Jerome is obviously based on multiple versions of the Joker (New 52, Arkhamverse, Ledger, Nicholson, ect) and kinda gets criticized for not being "unique" take on the Joker while saying that Jeremiah is. But that's entirely true... Jeremiah is obviously based on past incarnations as well (Golden Age, Telltale, Dark Knight Returns, BTAS, ect). Both of them take numerous inspirations from various comic books. Ledger and Phoenix can be considered unique as their versions were created for realistic versions of their respective universe.

But the reason why Jerome was so much better is because he almost had it all: the laugh, the insanity, the philosophy, the look (except the colors), ect. Jeremiah only had the looks and the obsession with Bruce, he later developed the others after a few seasons.
Also Jerome’s backstory is much more fitting for the Joker: a boy who was raised in a circus in an abusive enviroment. That makes so much sense for the Joker unlike Jeremiah's who was just a scientist who was gassed by his brother (no I don't believe that Jerome was the good kid, in fact I don't believe that any of them were - Jerome was not only shown to be quite delusional and mix up some memories, but he was also shown to be a liar as well) who originally had all the Joker's mannerisms and ideas. The latter makes the Joker feel like a copycat of someone else (Jerome in this case), which was actually the original plan for the writers when it came to the Joker topic.
Jeremiah is just a puppet to Jerome’s final and posthumous will. The punchline to Jerome’s killing joke. The funniest part is that Jeremiah doesn't even realize this.

1. Now the common criticism of Jerome was that he was not smart and Jeremiah was more intelligent. Both of these is kinda wrong (Jeremiah is obviously a genius and might be more educated than Jerome was but education =/= intelligence). Firstly, Jerome was pretty damn smart and secondly, Jerome literally outsmarted Jeremiah 3 times before he died.

Jerome managed to build a massive bomb which was powerful enough to blow up the Gotham power plant in season 3.
He also had guards and snipers protecting his show in 4x18 in case a GCPD sniper tries to kill him.
Jeremiah planned to capture Jerome and take him to the maze and keep him trapped there. Surprise, not only Jerome had Mad Hatter and Scarecrow follow him, he also managed to get out of the maze on his own!
Then there's the fact that Jerome had his "gift" disguised as if it was sent by Bruce to lure Jeremiah into a trap. Jerome managed to predict that Jeremiah will begin to feel some connection to Bruce and he exploited it to trap his brother and it worked!
Jeremiah tries to deny that his brother won, but not only is he delusional but arrogant as well and he will never admit that Jerome won.
Now if the writers had continued with Jerome, imagine how much more fun and horrifying the Ace Chemicals episode would've been.

I know it's not exactly fan art, but it's the most fitting for this kind of thing. Another fanfiction has it as its flair when it was posted here. Anyway, this is my output for the OnK fanfic train. I hope you guys enjoy! The link to the fanfiction.net page will be at the bottom.
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With the rise of violence against celebrities also comes the rise of elements that protect against them. A rookie agent finds himself assigned to a famous idol with a promise to defend. And what was supposed to be a training assignment would eventually grow to so much more.
***
The young man grumbled as he trudged the halls of his home towards his father’s office. His hand would rake through his black hair in his face in annoyance while his two emerald eyes with four-point star-shaped irises focused forward. He already knew what was gonna happen and he wished he could refuse. He had been hoping to devote his time to honing his gaming skills with the hope of maybe one day joining a pro-E-sports team. But, because his father was an old man with a small scope of the modern world, he laughed and told him to do something real with his life. And something real meant taking over the family business one day.
Kurosawa Security Services, or simply KSS, is a Japanese family-owned security company based in Kyoto although they have offices all over the country and even abroad. KSS provides everything from security guards for convenience stores to close protection agents for top government figures. They can also provide security consultation and training. The service is rated as the best Japan has to offer with highly trained agents. KSS agents regularly train with the police and military elements like the Security Police and Special Forces Group. And in rare occasions, they would even train with the US Secret Service abroad. KSS is also the best because of the long history of the organization which dates back to the feudal era when Kurosawa Saitō picked up the sword and protected the local Daimyo from an attack. In other words, they had a long time to hone their craft.
Now, what makes a security company like KSS so big in a country where crime is almost non-existent? Isn’t Japan a safe nation? Those would be your first mistakes if you thought of them. It doesn’t matter which part of the world you’re on, good and evil exist everywhere. And good must be protected from evil. That’s why KSS exists.
And soon enough, the company will be in Akio’s hands when it's his father’s time to retire. That’s how the system works, despite what he thinks of it. So, now his ultimate tests will begin. His first assignment.
After walking for what seemed like hours he reached a pair of large doors. He knocked on them and was asked to come in by a voice on the other side, so he complied. Entering, he was greeted with a fairly large office for only one man. And that man was currently seated behind a desk reading through some papers.
“Hey, Dad,” He greeted as he sat down on one of the chairs before across from him.
Kurosawa Tadao put the papers down and then looked at his son before smiling. He was an aging man with black hair that was already greying and blue eyes that had four-point star-shaped irises.
“Hey, Son! How’re ‘ya doing?” He asked.
“Just fine. I was finally getting my KDR up in Black Ops and I was planning on getting my skills up in CSGO later. But, here we are,” Akio answered.
“Staying inside is not good for your body you know.”
“I planned to play basketball tomorrow and I have band with the boys this weekend.”
“It’s still unhealthy because it’s exactly anything productive. You’re 17, Son, you need to start shaping up for your career,” Tadao said.
“I’ve been shaping it up since I was five,” Akio muttered.
“And that’s why we’re here right now. Your first assignment, son! It’s the moment of truth! Aren’t you excited?” Tadao asked with a wide grin as he picked up a folder from the side.
“No, not really,” Akio answered flatly.
“Well, maybe you’ll be excited once you find out who I’m assigning you to. Spoiler alert, she’s an idol,” He said with a grin, whispering that last part as he handed him the file.
“I’m not into idols, Dad,” He said flatly as he took the file.
“Your little brother a good chunk of this company’s personnel, and hell, a good chunk of the population are though,” He commented.
“That doesn’t make sense. Everyone can have different interests. And Goro, well, I guess being tied to a hospital bed for years does that to you,” He said sadly.
“You’re one weird kid, you know.”
“Well, I was raised by the likes of you, Dad,” Akio retorted with a sly grin which made his father laugh.
“Well, you got me there,” He chuckled and promptly silenced himself to let his son read.
“Hoshino Ai? Never heard of her. Although I admit she is pretty cute,” He mumbled as read through the file with her picture on it. He took in her personal information like date of birth, age, physical appearance, and all the usual things. And then he got to a part that listed her status— “What the fuck?! She’s pregnant?!”
“Language, Akio!” Tadao scolded. “Anyway, officially, she’ll be taking a break from showbiz for a while due to ill health. Actually, she’s pregnant and they’re trying to keep it under wraps. Bad for business, because a lot of fans are a bunch of lonely losers, they’ll drop her just because she has kids.”
“Language, Dad,” Akio retorted and shook his head. “Well, teen pregnancy is bad, but it’s unfair for her to be hated for that reason.”
“Yeah, the life of a celebrity is a lot shittier than most people would think. I know, your mother was a singer, she dealt with that too when we were found out,” Tadao said with a frown before smiling a bit. “She
“Please don’t tell me about your romances, Dad,” Akio cringed. “Anyway, Hoshino-sama will be my protectee, huh?”
“Yes. She’ll be heading here with her management agency soon to settle the contract. And then you’ll be heading to the countryside where she can lay low until she gives birth. That’s the basics of it.”
“Alright. Babysit a pregnant teenager and keep her from doing anything dumb. Should be easy enough,” He said.
“Do not underestimate the dangers tied to the entertainment world, Akio,” Tadao reminded. “As I’ve said, a lot of them are a bunch of lonely losers or generally just of questionable character. Some of them will go to great lengths just for attention. Fans can get really wacky after all. It’s already happened before. Not to mention, all the snakes in the industry. Someone might want to up their game so they think about eliminating the competition. You get the point.”
“I’m very aware, Dad, don’t worry,” He assured then sighed. “Just doing this and my studies at the same time? What am I gonna do?”
“That’s rich coming from someone who was planning on just lazing around all day. Besides, you’ve been homeschooling for more than a year already, right? I’m sure you can get a read in every day without compromising your job.”
“Well, it’s not impossible, but it’s gonna suck,” He said then sighed. “Alright, I’ve got this. Not much of a choice anyway. Anything else I should know?”
“Yeah. Remember this, you do not ever let your protectee out of your sight. Wherever she goes, you go. That being said, don’t be too overbearing, and make sure to give her room to breathe. She is a woman, she will want her space. Also, try not to set such a tight atmosphere. Try being her friend, and she’ll be easier to work with. Tomita will meet you tomorrow too to evaluate you. You’ll also be reporting to him your progress during your task.”
“Noted, Dad. In that case,” Akio stood then positioned himself directly in front of the table before bowing. “I shall see this task to the end.”
***
Idol music was not his cup of tea and Hoshino Ai was a complete stranger to him till that moment. He’d spend a whole week with the pre-preparations with one of the senior agents until it was time to meet the latest customers. Then he would meet Hoshino Ai for the first time and they’d make their first impressions of one another.
***
“Are you really sure about this?”
“We’re going to need a shield just in case. Lot’s of wackos around here. Besides, we’ve already agreed to meet.”
“It’s just, there’s a lot of shady dealings in the security world.”
“Are we any better? Besides, KSS is the best this country can offer. I also know the company head personally too, we went to high school together, and he owes me. We’ll be just fine.”
“Um, o-okay…”
“I didn’t understand any of that, but okay!”
“Never change, Ai…”
How do you keep a secret from the world? Simple: you lie. You lie a lot. But then you realize it’s not so simple and every day is spent with fear that everything might fall apart. Just trying to get anywhere was a massive undertaking. For example, right now. Two adults and a pregnant teen in a car. Aside from the teen pregnancy, there’s nothing strange at all about it. But if you knew who the car’s passengers were, then you’d immediately understand.
After a couple of hours of driving (making occasional turns to make sure they weren’t followed and consequently getting lost a couple of times) they finally reached their destination which was a large estate in the outskirts of Kyoto. A guard met them at the gate, and after the driver talked and showed some credentials, they were let in. It took another minute or two until they reached the house where a group was waiting for them. The car group got out of their vehicle with the house group greeting them shortly after. A man with short blonde hair and yellowish-brown eyes underneath some shades stepped forward and led the group.
“Ichigo-san, you’re still about as ugly as when I last saw you,” Tadao greeted with a cheeky grin as he approached.
“Tadao-san, you’re clearly the most repulsive one here. I see you still haven’t taken my advice to get your face fixed,” Ichigo greeted with a snarky expression as he also approached.
Once close enough, they locked hands for a shake before pulling each other in for a hug.
“It’s nice to see you again, friend! How’re you doin', man? No troubles getting here?” Tadao asked.
“I’m just fine. Getting here was a lot smoother than we thought. But we are exhausted,” Ichigo replied.
“I imagine. Remember that time in Second Year when we bought booze with fake IDs and we had to run for it?”
“Ha, how can I forget?! I was terrified the cops would get us!”
As the two men shared stories and laughed, everyone else present could not help but be astonished at how casual the two were being. It almost was like this wasn’t a business meeting.
“Yeah, those were the days,” Tadao laughed and turned to the other two people to address them. “Before we continue any further, allow me to introduce myself. I am Kurosawa Tadao, head of Kurosawa Security Services, and I welcome you all to my home. It’s nice to meet you!”
He then stepped toward the next person. She was a rather tall woman with long strawberry-blonde hair and pinkish-brown eyes.
“And you must be Miyako, his wife, yes?” He asked.
“Yes, I am,” She said with a polite smile as they shook hands.
“You know, I’ve always wondered how someone with a face like his could get married. But here we are,” He joked earning a laugh from her.
“I sometimes wonder why I decided to marry him too,” She commented and they both laughed.
“Huh? What?” Ichigo said but was ignored.
Then, Tadao moved to the last person. She was a short girl with long violet hair with matching eyes that have stars in them. But her most distinct feature was the bulge in her abdomen showing her pregnancy. Moreover, she looked like she wasn’t even 18. This observation made his gut wrench due to feeling pity for this poor girl’s bad decision. Regardless, he put on his best smile and took her hand.
“And you must be Hoshino Ai,” He greeted. “I’ve heard all about you, but since I’m the stereotypical old man, I’m not into your music. Regardless of that, and after listening to a couple of songs, I think you’re doing some very great work in your field.”
Her lips curved into a smile that cured souls as her eyes seemed to shimmer. Tadao kept himself from reacting, but at that moment he knew why she was so popular.
“Thank you so much, Tadao-san! You know, I don’t think I’m that popular to begin with but I’m always so happy to hear that someone like what I do!” She said happily.
He chuckled a bit. “I used to be in a band in middle school and high school, so I still try to stay up to date with the latest musical trends these days. Although, I still don’t know much. I mostly get my info on that from my own agents.”
He glanced to the side followed by Ai shortly after to see three younger agents standing stiffly as they tried to ignore them. They knew exactly who she was. All three of them have her as their phone’s lock screen wallpaper. And it’s clear that they wanted to talk to her, but they couldn’t. And even if they could, they didn’t know how. Ai giggled in amusement while Tadao just stared.
“Anyway, now that introductions have been made, let’s go inside where it’s more comfortable. I know you’re here for business, so let’s dive right in. We’ve also prepared snacks and refreshments inside in case you want some. Ichigo, my valet will take care of your car, so give him the keys please,” Tadao said as he gestured for them to follow.
“Do you have ice cream?” Ai asked.
“We sure do!”
“Yay! Let’s go!”
After Ichigo handed over the keys to a valet, Tadao began leading them into his home with the trio following shortly after. But before that, a mischievous thought entered Ai’s mind and she acted quickly. She suddenly turned to look at the trio of agents who tensed up even more under her gaze. Worse, they realized that she was up to no good just from her grin. But before they could even speculate what she was up to, she suddenly did her signature love heart hand pose with a smile. In a flash, the three agents felt their knees go weak in the presence of such moe cuteness that they struggled to stay upright as they covered their mouths to silence their ecstatic screams. Satisfied with her handiwork, Ai giggled as she left the scene of the crime.
“Um, are they gonna be alright?” Ichigo asked nervously as he saw one of them falling over.
“They’ll be fine.”
They entered the huge house and led them through a series of hallways that were decorated with all sorts of interesting stuff. One of them was some sort of cannon on a towed carriage, except, aside from one big barrel, it’s got multiple little ones arranged in a circle with a crank.
“Kurosawa-san, what’s that?” Ai asked.
“Oh, this? This is a Model 1874 Gatling Gun. It fires a .45-70 caliber round from top-loaded 20-round box magazines with a rate of fire of about a thousand rounds per minute, although, it really depends on how fast you can crank it. It was one of the most revolutionary weapons ever designed and it changed the battlefield forever. This specific weapon here was used by the Imperial Army against revolting samurai during their last stand in the Battle of Mount Shiroyama, the last action of the Satsuma Rebellion,” He explained. “Sometimes I wonder what the samurai were thinking in their last moments just before they were all gunned down.”
“Wow,” Ai whispered in awe.
“Indeed. I don’t even know where my father dug up this gun,” He said before tracing across the black-painted barrels of the old weapon.
“That’s so cool!” She exclaimed happily then fished out her phone from her hoodie pocket. “Can I take a picture with it?”
“Ai, we’re here in business and the man’s likely very busy, so let’s not take anymore—” Ichigo said but was cut off.
“Sure thing! Our meeting is the only thing I have on my schedule today, so I’m basically free to do anything!” Tadao interjected with a wide smile as she took her phone.
What followed next was a comedic scene which was basically an old man doting on his granddaughter while he took pictures of her doing cute things. Meanwhile, everyone else present just stared with blank expressions.
“So much for not being into idols,” Ichigo muttered.
“These are so good! Thank you so much, Kurosawa-san!” She thanked him with a wide smile after going over the pictures.
“You’re very welcome! And you know, we’ve got a lot of goodies in this house, maybe you’d like to take some pictures with them too?” He offered.
“I’d love to!” She squealed.
“Mhmm!” Someone cleared their throat.
Looking in that direction, they saw a young man dressed in a nice business suit who was basically a younger version of Tadao. He approached them with his hands in his pockets and regarded them with a straight expression.
“You’re getting off track here, Dad. We’re still conducting a business,” He said as a matter of factly. “And what happened to ‘no touching of the expensive decor’?”
“Oh come on, son, do you honestly believe I can refuse that?” Tadao complained as he gestured to Ai who maintained a happy expression as she looked at the photos.
“Don’t enable her, Dad. Ma’am, please stop touching the gun, it’s very old and very expensive,” He said.
“Ai, get off of it,” Ichigo ordered.
“Aw, okay,” She said sadly as she backed off.
“Sorry for the trouble, but this stuff is crazy expensive. And oh, I’m Kurosawa Akio, by the way. It’s a pleasure to meet all of you,” He greeted with a polite smile.
“This is my son. He’ll be taking care of the business one day, so I’m bringing him along more now,” Tadao said.
Another round of handshakes was exchanged as the group introduced themselves to Akio. Ai expected the tone and body language of a fan holding himself back, the same kind she’s gotten used to seeing, but was rather surprised when he shook her hands normally with nothing but politeness in his eyes. Strange, now she’s curious. Akio on his part thought that she was a rather normal-looking girl, except for the bulging stomach, and didn’t find anything very special from just looking at her.
“Sorry for messing around. It’s just a really cool-looking thing!” Ai said.
“It sure is, ‘can’t argue with that. They don’t make weapons like these anymore these days. It’s all just big bombs now, which is boring,” Akio remarked.
“I don’t think death and destruction are supposed to be nice to see,” Miyako remarked.
“Exactly,” Tadao stated with a firm voice. “And that’s what we strive for in KSS. Every day must always be boring. Now come on, we’ve got business to attend to.” He said before turning and walking away.
“Is he always like this?” Miyako asked with a sweatdrop, noting the man’s sudden change of face.
“You’ll get used to it,” Both Ichigo and Akio replied in a flat tone.
They finished the walk toward their destination which was a conference room inside the house. The place was quite spacious and cozy looking, especially since it has a fireplace. They all immediately took their seats with KSS taking one side of the table and Ichigo Productions sitting opposite of them.
“Snacks will be brought in a little bit, so let’s get down to business to business shall we,” Tadao said as he placed a briefcase on the table and pulled out some papers. “By the way, everything we talk about will not leave this room, you can trust us. I think I also know the reason why you need an extra pair of hands. Your reason for getting a bodyguard is because you’re worried that you’ll be attacked like that idol that got stabbed recently, yes?”
They all nodded at that. It was already a month old, but the memory of it was still fresh on everyone’s minds, especially since it was covered on national news.
An idol named Hirose Keiko, who was pretty popular and only 16 like Ai, was recently murdered by a crazy fan in her own home. The autopsy report stated that the cause of death was cardiac arrest from severe bleeding after being stabbed three times and that she died in minutes.
The police captured the killer before he could jump off a bridge and took him in for questioning. He said that a Twitter post showing Keiko being all friendly with some guy somewhere made people think she had gotten a boyfriend. This enraged him because he felt betrayed by her actions, therefore he stalked her and plotted her murder for weeks. So, it was pretty awkward for him to find out that Keiko’s supposed boyfriend was actually her cousin and she was at a family get-together at that time.
The news shocked everyone in the country and many celebrities started taking their personal security more seriously. Ichigo was worried for Ai, and Ai was a bit scared herself. She knew Keiko, they did some collaborations together in the past, and she was upset she couldn’t attend her funeral. So, Ichigo Productions, though a bit cash-strapped, decided that it would be a good idea to have some form of security with them to help out in the long run. Especially now that Ai was pregnant… they couldn’t stomach the thought of some deranged lunatic stabbing her to death like what happened to Keiko.
“I don’t think I can forget that. I knew the girl and her agency, they were good people. I hope that bastard gets the chair,” Ichigo muttered.
“You and me both. And don’t worry, we’ll make sure nothing ever happens to you,” Tadao assured. “Alright, now, how do you want to be protected?”
“We just need someone with us to keep the creeps away, especially one that can lie low with us. Nothing flashy at all,” Ichigo answered.
“Hmm, I understand what you want. One or two agents on you at all times at least, covering your front and back. They’ll be in plain clothes too so as to not draw attention. Okay, I’ve got a lot of agents to spare for that kind of job,” Tadao said, as he wrote on a piece of paper.
“What else is there?” Ichigo asked.
“We’re gonna brief you on how we operate and how we intend to do this. None of them are hard to follow at all. The gist is that you need to tell us everything, your schedules, contacts, extra activities, etcetera.”
“So, I’ll basically be followed around everywhere?” Ai asked.
“Basically, yes. But the key difference is that it’ll be by people you can trust. However, that doesn’t mean we’ll be poking around your daily life and infringing on your space every day. We’ll create a system in which you’re safe but still comfortable. In fact, we even have methods to protect you without you or anyone seeing us, but that’s really expensive though,” Tadao explained. “We know our boundaries too, Hoshino-sama, you don’t have to worry.”
“Hmm,” Ai hummed as she considered his words before another thought occurred to her. “Will you kill people?”
“Only if they really force us to. Every agent has a loaded gun with him, but we’re also trained in ways to stop an attacker with non-lethal force. Besides, one of our tactics is that by simply being there, we can discourage anyone from trying anything funny. As I’ve said, the best days for us are the most boring ones.”
“I see.”
“What’s the price tag?” Miyako asked.
“Despite the low elements, you’re still looking at 500,000 yen per month. But…” He trailed off. “But… due to my debt to you, Ichigo, I’ve decided to give you half that price for six months. This is paid like a subscription service where you have to pay every month. Failure to pay means immediate termination of services.”
“Is there anything else?” Ichigo asked.
“There are a bunch more details that you need to know. Legality, protocols, company policy, and all that. But, there’s one detail that I threw in as a condition for this,” Tadao said then placed a hand on Akio’s shoulder who was sitting to his right. “My son will be the one to run point of your protection detail. This’ll also act as his first test, to prove his skill as a protection agent.”
“Although I’m inexperienced, I’m quick to learn and adapt, and I’m ready to take on whatever task is needed from me,” Akio said politely.
Ichigo and Miyako frowned at the prospect of being given someone who was inexperienced in the field. But if he was the son of the guy who runs the place, then he should be pretty good, right? Besides, this is possibly the best deal they’ll ever get, and they weren’t about to look a gift horse in the mouth.
“Alright, that’s fine,” Ichigo said.
“I’m okay with it,” Ai said.
“Although, Akio will be running point so you’ll see him the most often, another rookie agent will also be there to learn too. He’ll be number two. A senior agent will also be dropping by occasionally to check on them and evaluate their performance, although you don’t need to pay him. And in case things get really bad, emergency services and other agents won’t be too far to assist,” Tadao added.
“Ah, alright,” Ichigo said.
“Now, for the rest of everything.”
They would spend the next thirty minutes getting into the details of how everything would be under their care. Snacks and refreshments were brought in at that time with Ai receiving a pint of ice cream, making her very happy. They got into some legal conditions that were implemented to protect both sides. They also got into how the protection detail would work and what to do under certain situations. And of course, company policy.
One such policy is that the client can sue the company for up to 30 million yen for disclosing any secrets entrusted to them without permission. And although KSS can definitely pay that amount, their reputation would be tarnished and they’d lose even more money. That was a fact that allowed Ichigo Productions to rest easier. Ai’s pregnancy needed to remain under wraps.
After a few more minutes and a couple more things were clarified, they finally moved on to the last piece of the puzzle. Tadao opened up his briefcase and pulled out one last set of papers.
“This is the contract. What’s is just a summary of everything we talked about, but I suggest you read it carefully so you’re not missing anything,” Tadao said.
Ichigo Productions took the document and carefully read through it to make sure they were not missing anything. It took another five minutes, but they confirmed that everything was in place.
“A service that tells you everything and makes you read the contract first? Finally!” Ichigo joked.
“We’re the guys that protect the Emperor, not some shady organization! We’ve got a reputation to uphold!” Tadao stated. “Anyway, if nothing is amiss, sign your name and seal on the space provided and we are officially under your employ.”
“Everything’s here. Let’s seal the deal,” Ichigo said.
He grabbed a pen that was provided to him and signed his name on the line at the bottom then stamped his seal on the side. Miyako did the same thing after him. And finally, Ai filled out the last line with her name and seal and even drew a little heart on it. Tadao took the document and looked through it before putting it down and giving them a smile.
“You are now under the protection of Kurosawa Security Services! With Hachiman, the divine protector of Japan, guiding our hands, you will not have to worry about anything as long as we are around! Rest assured that we will take care of you. And anyone that tries to harm you will die a horrible death!” He proclaimed.
“That’s… oddly specific,” Ichigo remarked.
“If you get hurt, we’ll cover the expenses of your medical bill. If you die under our watch, which you won’t, we’ll offer a full refund to your relatives, and we’ll even avenge you. That’s our policy, to treat our clientele as if they are our family,” He added.
“That’s very nice,” Miyako said.
“Only the best we provide our clients,” Tadao said. “And aside from giving you a copy of the documents, this concludes our business. Thank you for choosing our services. We promised not to disappoint.”
“We’ll be watching closely then.”
Both groups then stood up and gave each other one last bout of handshakes to truly seal the contract that was just signed.
“I’ll make sure your men get tickets to one of my concerts in the future!” Ai said and looked at Akio. “Especially you, Akio-san.”
“Oh, that’s very kind of you, Hoshino-sama. But, I’m not into idol music,” He replied politely.
“Huh?”
“Please excuse my son. We know he’s a weirdo,” Tadao jokingly said.
“I ain’t weird, Dad. I don’t hate idol music but I don’t exactly like it either. I just like other things,” Akio stated.
“It’s not impossible, but it’s a first for us. Everyone your age we’ve met is into idols,” Saitou said. “Looks like you’re the 10% we didn’t see coming.”
“Please just take it as less worry for you, since I won’t be prying for your attention all the time. I’ll always keep a respectful distance. I promise.”
“That’s all we can ever ask really. Thank you.”
“Now that business is concluded, we can all turn in for the night. But would you like something before you leave? Some more snacks or drinks perhaps? We’ve got a lot here,” Tadao offered but Ichigo shook his head.
“No, we’ve already been here too long, we don’t want to overstay our welcome. Besides, it’s late and we’re all tired. We should be getting back now,” he said.
“Alright. In that case, allow us to walk you out while I get the valet to get your car.”
“Alright then.”
Ichigo Productions prepared to leave while Tadao got on his phone. Ichigo and Miyako started discussing something with each other while Ai simply looked around the room. Her eyes would eventually land on Akio who was looking at his phone. He’d pocket it a moment later and his eyes would land on his protectee’s. She’d flashed him a wide smile, the kind that can captivate any man, while he returned with a simple smile and a nod. Ai began opening her mouth to speak before stopping short when there was a disturbance from Tadao.
“... Really? Alright, I’ll tell them,” He sighed before turning to the group.
“What’s wrong?” Ichigo asked.
Tadao smiled awkwardly. “A small problem just developed on your end.”
They’d find themselves outside again a moment later, watching a scene unfold before them. Ichigo Production’s car, a white rental Toyota Corolla, remained where Ichigo last left it although the hood was open and multiple guys were peering into the engine compartment with flashlights. One agent tried turning the key and starting the ignition, yet the engine remained quiet. A moment later, a middle-aged man with his sleeves rolled up walked up to Tadao while wiping his hands on a rag.
“I think it’s a broken sparkplug, Tadao-san. It just won’t start,” He reported.
“I told you it was broken!” Miyako scolded Ichigo in a hushed voice.
“Do we have spare parts, Hiro-san?” Tadao asked.
“No, we just ran out when our own rides needed maintenance and we haven’t resupplied yet,” He said with a shake of his head. “We can’t run to the shop too because it’s already closed at this time. This thing’s staying here till morning.”
Ichigo and Miyako groaned at their misfortune while the rest of them simply stared indifferently. Tadao then sighed and spoke again.
“Alright. In that case, Hiro-san, please get the van off the driveway and onto the side. We’ll deal with it tomorrow morning. Then please take one of the Land Cruisers and take them back to their hotel. The rest of you are free to leave for home too,” He ordered.
“Hai, Kurosawa-sama!” Everyone replied.
“Tadao-san, are you sure? This is probably too much—” Ichigo began but stopped when Tadoa raised a hand.
“It’s fine, I don’t mind at all. Just think of this as me helping a friend in need. And no, you don’t have to pay,” He replied.
Ichigo was unsure but ultimately allowed it and bowed a bit. “Alright, thank you.”
“No problem,” Tadao replied with a shallow nod.
While the adults addressed the issue of their ride, the two kids remained on the side and simply watched. Akio and Ai were still in their teens, so they were kids in the eyes of the adults present.
“So,” Ai began. “What kind of music do you listen to, Kurokawa-san?”
“Uh, I like rock music of all types from pop to death metal. I’ve been listening to them since I was five. And it’s Kurosawa, Hoshino-sama,” He replied, her sudden question and error of his name catching him off guard.
“Ah, really? Ahahaha, I’m so sorry! I'm not very good at memorizing people’s faces!” She laughed jovially.
“Ahaha, I can imagine. Since you probably see so many faces every day, it’s hard to keep track of them all, huh?” He laughed.
“Ah, yeah! It’s a bit of a problem for me, hehe. Sometimes, I even forget the President’s name too, haha!”
He laughed along with her but internally, he was cringing a bit.
Does every idol have such an airheaded personality? He wondered.
“It must be kinda hard for you too, having to work like this when you’re so young,” She remarked.
“Well, this is my first job ever, so it doesn’t seem hard at all right now. That’s definitely gonna change though,” He replied. “But, I don’t think my job will get anywhere as difficult as yours with you having to put up an act all the time. I don’t think I can handle that.”
“Yeah, tell me about it. I really like my job, but sometimes it gets pretty tiring. Taking a break like this is gonna help out a lot!” She said happily before taking a deep breath and looking around. “I think I’ve already said this, but your place is really nice.”
“Mhmm, and this is just our place here in Tokyo. We’re only here now because we need to be closer to some of our clients at the moment. Our main house in Kyoto is even bigger and cooler!” Akio replied.
“You guys are really loaded, huh?”
“For the past few decades, Kurosawa has been branching to other things that make money. We need the cash to pay for our stuff after all. Although, we’re still inferior to zaibatsus like Shinomiya and Shijo (who we provide services to, by the way) but also still better than most.”
“Wow.”
“Mhmm, but money still isn’t everything. We try to take a humble approach to things too. Dad doesn’t like spending money on anything that isn’t important and I don’t buy a lot of things myself,” He added and kept his mouth open to continue when he was interrupted.
“Don’t believe him! He eats yakiniku at least once a week!” One of the younger agents stated as he walked by with a bag over his shoulder, likely on his way home.
“Look who’s talking, idiot! You spend the most out of all of us!” He retorted angrily but only got a laugh in response. He turned back to Ai who was holding a hand over her mouth to stifle her giggles, prompting him to sigh in annoyance. “Alright, I admit that part and also I spend a lot quite a lot on video games and band equipment, but only on special occasions. I’m not some pompous rich jerk that throws money around, I promise you.”
“Hmm, alright, I believe you,” She giggled and then thought of something. “You could’ve totally left that part out or outright lied. Why didn’t you?”
“Uh, it was already out, so there’s no point in trying to lie about it anymore. Besides, I don’t believe you deserve to be lied to, Hoshino-sama,” He answered.
Her smile wavered ever so slightly as she processed his answer. I don’t deserve to be… lied to?
“Um—”
“Ai, our ride’s here! Let’s head back to the hotel!” Ichigo called out as one of the company’s Land Cruisers had been brought out to take them.
“I guess we’ll just have to continue this conversation some other time, but it’s been a nice talk. I look forward to working with you, Hoshino-sama,” He said with a wide smile and an outstretched hand.
“Ai.”
“Sorry?”
Ai smiled widely too, her eyes seemingly shimmering brighter as she took his hand and shook it. “Since we’ll be sticking so closely together for a while, you can just call me Ai, Akio-san.”
He blinked. “U-Uh, sure thing, Ai-san.”
“Just Ai,” She clarified.
“Just Ai,” He nodded and smiled widely, happy that she remembered his first know, even if he didn’t know why.
“If that’s what you want, you’re the boss,” Akio remarked, earning another laugh from her. “You have a good night, Ai, and I’ll see you again tomorrow.”
“You too, Akio-san.”
She’d head back to her group a moment later and they were leaving the estate shortly. Akio waved at the car as it drove past him and he could just barely see a human figure waving back through the darkness. As he watched the SUV disappear, he put his hand down and looked up at the sky.
“Wow,” He breathed. “Her eyes are something else.”
He’d retire for the night shortly after without another thought. He’d sleep soundly not knowing that he had just stepped on the path that would define his life.
***
This is the link to the ff.net page. Thank you very much for taking the time to read it, and thank you even more if you decide to support it on ff.net! Please also tell me what you think and/or if you have any ideas you'd like to share here or there!
For now, have a great day, and peace out!
Veritas vos liberabit.
The Truth will set you Free.

Sigh... do I really have to do this? Ohh, whatever...
Hello and welcome to episode 2 in a series inspired by u/Valha28 and CinemaSins, where I'll be sinning each and every episode of The Owl House.
I present you, Everything Wrong With: Witches Before Wizards
Luz: It wasn't a dream! [Opens the window.] Good morning, terrifying fantasy world.
Monster: [Waving at her.] Good morning. [Sinks into the ocean.]
Luz: Ughhh. OK, this was actually funny. -1
​
Just about the episode as a whole, I think they should've focused a bit more on Luz exploring the isles instead the pointless plot we actually got.+20
​
Hooty: Hi, Luz!
[Luz screams and karate chops Hooty's face.]
Hooty: Ow! I'm just wishing you a good morning. [Retreats to the front door.] Jeez! Hoot! Ow! Hooty being insulted for no reason clitché +1
Adegast: And only the Chosen One can pull the staff from its post.
Luz: [Stops walking.] Chosen one. The show expects us to believe that Luz is the chosen one in the second episode.+1
King: Your wizard client told Luz... [Laughs.] she was a— [Laughing.] was a Chosen One! [Laughing.]
Eda: Wait, wait, Luz? [Snickers.] [Laughs so hard she falls back onto the floor.]
King: He even gave her a map. Characters laughing at something really unfunny clitché +1
​
Hooty: Hoot, hoot. If you want the answer that you seek, solve my riddle within a week—
[Eda punches the wall hard enough to shake the whole house and leave cracks in the wall.]
Hooty: Ow! Okay, okay. She went into the forest towards Bonesborough. Sheesh! Hooty being insulted for no reason clitché +2
​
Nevareth: I see. So you're the Chosen One. [Scoffs.] The Celestial Staff should've picked me, Nevareth Bladestrife, Teen Prince of Angstmore.
Luz: [Staring at his biceps.] Yes. Yes, I did make the right choice. Actually, this is a good way to foreshadow that Luz is BI. -1
​
Eda: Look, kid, everyone wants to believe they're "chosen". But if we all waited around for a prophecy to make us special, [Chuckles.] we'd die waiting. And that's why you need to choose yourself. The only good part of the episode.-1
Total sins: 21
Most sinned episode so far: Witches Before Wizards (21)
Least sinned episode so far: A lying witch and a Warden (16)
previous episode: https://www.reddit.com/TheOwlHouse/comments/13mn5vb/eww_a_lying_witch_and_a_warden/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3

Significant note: ONLY MESSAGE ME IF you're 21+ years old (NO MINORS) and from the U.S (due to the difference in timezones past 3 hours). I'm on Pacific standard timezone so I would like to talk with you if you're from CST, PST, EST, or MST. I'm not interested in NSFW, drugs, alcohol or talking about politics either so DON'T contact me if you like those things
It's very hard in this day and age to find people who not only have similar interests to yours, but are open to learning about new things, and wanting to be present with you/reciprocate what you give them. I'm looking to hopefully befriend a few people that are down for chatting consistently throughout our days and nights! I'm a night owl so it's most definitely preferred you're one as well. I don't like small talk so let's try to have more deep and meaningful conversations about anything and everything! Please don't message me if you're going to be rude/demeaning towards me just because I wouldn't answer your message. I noticed a lot of people on here lately don't take kindly to rejection and think it's okay to send me hate messages. I have to filter people out (as per my top most paragraph in all bold) and just in general. It's nothing personal, just boundaries set in place to protect me. So let's not go to bad places, mkay?
In a friendship, I like being able to be supportive/there for my friends, as well as listening to you vent/giving you advice if I can! I also would love to be able to play this battle royal called cyber hunter as I don't have anyone consistent to play with. Not really looking for gaming buddies aside from this game but that could very well change in the future! I now have a PS5 thanks to my bf saving up! We just finished spiderman miles morales and are now playing control. My favorite genre of games is horror but I also love fighting games, racing games, open world, action/adventure, etc. It would be epic if we could do Spotify group sessions so that we can explore our own music + new music. I'm in desperate need of new music as my playlists have been stale for quite a long while due to various bands I like pumping out disappointing albums/singles. I'm open to voice chatting BUT ONLY after we have spoken for quite a long while. Do not try to get me to do this with you right away. I'd also like to be able to watch stuff, maybe on YouTube or something!
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I'm becoming more and more excited for upcoming movies like into the spider verse, the transformers movie, and the flash. I'd love to talk about previous movies I've watched recently, such as the animated legion of superheroes movie, guardians 3, etc. And if you couldn't already tell I'm a lover of both DC and marvel comics. Please don't ask me generic questions about them!! That would be uber lame and make me no longer be interested in chatting with ya
As for other interests, I'm quite the gamer. I own a PC and ps vita besides the PS5 I mentioned. I like being able to get out of the house often as I get bored easily. I love getting to go on walks, looking at nature, and taking pictures of it! I also enjoy playing some tabletop games, playing pool, going to bookstores to comic shop/manga shop, collecting squishmallows, going thrifting, listening to music, binge watching old shows or YouTube, etc.
If you want to learn more about me then what are you waiting for?? Send me a message about you and make sure to check out the other friend posts I've made on my profile! I only respond to people who put effort into their messages as most people don't like to do that on here SO BE FOREWARNED! ･:*+.(( °ω° ))/.:+ tootles!