There’s a recent post floating around with respect to what the Murder Sheet couple said in their March 20, 2023 podcast:
“last Monday at 4:13 PM The Delphi Murders: Kegan Kline's Proposed Change of Plea Hearing”
With all due respect to the OP and her thoughts on the couples comments. I think you have to listen yourself and make your own opinion on what they said, and what they meant. It did make for a good discussion— that’s for sure. And honestly I think that’s what it’s all about.
Just wanted to go over it because it sounds to me Kevin and Aine are telling people not to read too much into the River search and some of the events leading up to Richard Allen’s arrest. It’s odd they would suddenly start telling people to not read too much into the custody transfer of Junior to the ISP, the Wabash River search, granny’s backyard burn pit search, and Richard Allen’s backyard pile of ashes— which ultimately led to Allen’s arrest.
Strange the couple with the podcast and bevy of Delphi leaks would suddenly be telling everyone not to do any speculating themselves. Who are they talking to? So they really think the public at large shouldn’t speculate like they speculate? We can’t put two and two together and come up with three?
This is an excerpt from a post I made back on January 20, 2023 with respect to some of the Murder Sheets reporting that was made regarding the River search and granny’s backyard burn pit search:
The Wabash River Search started on 8/19/2022 and ended on 9/28/2022. We know the River search ended and next thing the ISP investigators were focused on was backyard ashes in Peru and Delphi.
News story regarding the Wabash River search and a certain someone’s mothers backyard burn pit
Fox59 by Russ McQuaid
”About the same time the original hearing was scheduled we saw some pretty intense searches going on, a search of the Wabash River and the search of the fire pit at the home of Kegan Kline’s grandparents,” said Kevin Greenlee, an attorney, and host of the podcast THE MURDER SHEET which has delved into the Delphi murders. “Perhaps those searches were not as successful as they might like.”
The search behind grandma’s house started sometime in early October 2022 and was immediately followed by Allen’s backyard search that took place on 10/13/2022.
Quote from an article in the New York Post dated 11/22/2022 by Haley Brown and Ken Kessler.
“They were definitely snooping around a lot at the fire pit and at the backyard,” a neighbor said, who described “lots of flashlights, lots of pictures, lots of sifting.”
The neighbors couldn’t make sense of why the fire pit was being examined at the time, saying “we never really see them burn things.”
We don’t know what was found but we can speculate from the photos being taken they found something. The obvious things they would have destroyed is anything that may have the girls DNA and their own DNA on it: s Clothing, jackets, hoodies, gloves, boots, hats, ski mask, seat cover, floor mats, etc..
It doesn’t take much common sense to know exactly why they were searching through someone’s mothers backyard burn pit. It didn’t take them long to move from one burn pit to the next. Peru, Indiana to Delphi, Indiana. The backyard on Paw Paw Pike to the backyard on Whiteman Rd. There is no mistaking who the FBI and the ISP is looking at. He has a violent criminal history. He was downloading the type of CSAM that will get you 20 years in a state penitentiary. He had a lot to lose if anyone went to their parents or the police with what they were doing to LIbby and Libby’s friend. Not long after murdering two teenage girls he was in Galveston, Indiana using the same ski mask he possibly used on RL’s land. Trust me it’s not the son they are after—- it’s the dad. The same guy that according to his own son he has held a gun on both him and his mother. How many people have we read about so far in this investigation that have held a gun on their own child and the mother of their only child? Could that same panicked UAW man hold a gun on two teenager’s, and do what he did to save his pedophile loser ass from going to jail the rest of his life?
So I’m gathering Aine and Kevin are telling people to not put stock in juniors CSAM case producing a plea deal that helps with the Delphi case. Personally I think any plea deal Junior would make with respect to Delphi would be based on his involvement in the murders. In other words he’s going to have to tell what he knows and what he did that day. The CSAM charges he’s facing are an entirely separate criminal investigation. Could there once have been a plea deal to plead guilty on the CSAM— in order to make a plea deal on Delphi once the CSAM charges are signed and sealed? Who knows.
But why are the MS Monotone’s suddenly telling us to not speculate on anything relating to that River search and those ash sifting searches in the backyards?
I know I was commenting along with another Redditor 8-9 months ago about a possible burn barrel behind the Canal Street house. Same with evidence being thrown in the Wabash River behind that Canal Street house. Coincidently they did find a loaded .38 within 1400’ of the river frontage behind the Canal Street. At least that’s what we know from an article about the 2019 Annual DeTrash the Wabash cleanup campaign. Junior was playing with a .38 and taking pictures of it to post to his Twitter. Another huge coincidence? Is it wrong to speculate he threw the knife in the River, too.
Not sure what they found in the Wabash River below the Kelly Street bridge, but I know it wasn’t nothing— I speculate it was somebody’s hunting knife. I also think they burned clothing, footwear and anything that could have incriminating DNA on it— behind the two respective homes some 40 miles apart. It is common sense to put the chain of events together. It’s common sense to think the guy who admits to chatting with Libby online that day—- somebody that had been catfishing her and her friends all that winter— somehow are logically connected to the murders of these two young girls.
I still haven’t figured out the Murder Sheet Monotones. Are they some secret undercover couple that’s been colluding with investigators this whole time. Are they part of a complex plan to out the men responsible for tricking two girls into walking to the isolated south end of one extremely dangerous bridge.
I think everyone could agree this is one strange murder investigation. I did watch a short Carroll County administrator meeting were they were arguing over $5000 extra to help with Allen’s prosecution. Heck I think we should start a GoFundMe page for the prosecution if the state of Indiana is not going to pony up with some dollars. I’d put up $100 to help prosecute the little troll man murderer if I knew it’d help.
I’d even throw in an extra $20 for McLelland to get a haircut. The Don Johnson look went out in the 80’s for shits sake. What the hell is in the water there?

The last time I saw my father, my priorities in life were figuring out which houses on my street would be giving out the full-size candy bars, or how to score an invitation to Samantha’s birthday party at the zoo. So when I received news that he had died, I didn’t feel sad. I didn’t feel much of anything.
My brother, he had moved to London to be closer to his wife’s family and mom passed away a few years ago. Breast cancer. I don’t often think about my father but in those last months I’d thought about him a lot. I had to stay an extra year to finish up my degree and by the time I had graduated only my brother brought flowers to the ceremony.
So it came as a complete surprise when I found out that my father was not only a well-respected psychologist, with books and everything to his name, but also a well-respected psychologist who had left his entire estate to me. An actual mansion (albeit in Maine) with the eight bedrooms and those lawn hedges that needed frequent trimmings. I guess he never remarried either.
I’ve been living at the mansion for about a week now, going through his old things, tidying up where I can. It feels invasive in a way, and nosy, because I’m really just his daughter in namesake only. The mansion itself is like something out of a Disney movie; there are these white marble, twin staircases that wrap around the entrance when you first walk in and I’m still finding new corridors and doors that lead to rooms I haven’t seen. The main living room (there are a total of three) echos when you talk just above a whisper and a single bedroom in this place is about the size of my apartment back in LA.
Despite all that, I decided pretty quickly that I wanted to sell this place, not just because this is way too much space for one person, but because there’s something about it that gives me the creeps. It’s not run down or anything; no cobwebs in the corners or rotting wood beams, and if there are stairs that lead to a basement torture chamber, I haven’t found them yet.
No, it’s because there are these giant velvet wall hangings with some sort of crest or symbol on them that I don’t recognize. There’s a circle and in the middle there’s an assortment of rectangles and a line running through them, looking almost like a circuit board– I’ll be the first to admit I’m not the best at describing these things. One wall hanging, I could understand. But why are they in every single room, draped over chairs and blocking out windows?
And then there are the framed portraits. I found one that must’ve been my father; he vaguely resembled the man I remembered and I could see my eyes in his. But the other photos, men and women of all races ranging from early twenties to what looked like eighty. Who were they? There must’ve been about a hundred or so of these photos, placed all over the mansion and even a week later I’m still discovering new ones in the oddest places. Just yesterday night, I was reading on my phone when a noise outside startled me. When I went to pick up my phone, I found another portrait under the bed.
On top of that I’m a city girl through and through, and here, you get blank stares just mentioning the word “traffic”. It’s also about a twenty minute drive to the nearest grocery store, and all of the houses around me might as well have their own zip codes.
But it was what I found tonight that was by far the most unnerving. I’d just finished dinner - Mac and Cheese with cut up hotdogs - a dish that felt almost insulting to the kitchen it was made in, when I decided I’d spend some time tonight organizing more of my father's things. I had KEEP, DONATE, SELL, and TRASH piles with the KEEP pile looking the most lonely by far.
There was one room I hadn’t spent much time in, that I had only peeked in for a brief moment when I first arrived. Judging by the handsome mahogany desk, the floor-to-wall bookshelves and the velvet green chaise lounge and leather chair, it was unmistakably my father’s office. There was something about this room that I wanted to save for last and there was no real reason for it, nothing I could express in words, anyways.
The room had been arranged with obvious care. I felt a sense of familiarity when I walked in, traced my fingers across these books I’d never heard of, wondered if my father had actually read of all them or if they were for display only. But it was what was tucked under his desk that caught my attention, a cardboard box with a single word scribbled on it.
CATHERINE
My name. My father wanted me to find this - but why?
I wasted no time in peeling off the packing tape, bracing myself for disappointment but hoping for something more. Well, it was a good thing I had prepared because I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t a little let down by what was in the box.
Cassette tapes. Twenty or so cassette tapes, stacked neatly in rows and on top of each other. I pulled a few from the top and they were all labeled with names and a number - patients of my father, perhaps?
Now, I may be showing my age here but I’ve never actually used a cassette player. It was by method of deduction that I spotted one sitting on my father’s desk, and after consulting trusty old Google, I was able to play the first tape.
To protect the identity of his patients, I’m going to use initials here. But I wanted to transcribe this session because while I’ve never been to therapy myself, something about this feels off to me. This is the tape that’s been labeled “RT 1”.
BEGIN TRANSCRIPT
Dr. Ashton: Good afternoon. I’m Dr. Ashton, you must be R.
RT: (Ahem) Yes. Yes I am.
Dr. Ashton: Well R, the floor is all yours. Would you like to talk about what’s been on your mind?
RT: I’m a bit nervous right now, if you couldn’t tell. (Laughs) Too much caffeine this morning, that’s why my hands are shaky. See?
Dr. Ashton: Can’t blame you, coffee is what gets me through most days. I hope I’m not the one making you nervous, I promise my friends down at county jail all say I’m really nice.
RT: (Laughs) No! No it’s not you. It’s just uh, this is my first time doing this, y’know? My boyfriend he uh, he’s been kinda nagging me to do this, therapy.
Dr. Ashton: Mhm.
RT: It’s just. He wants us to come out to our families. It’s been a whole year, so I get where he’s coming from, I do. But my parents, my family. I don’t think they would…
Dr. Ashton: Support you. You don’t think they would understand.
RT: It’s not just that. My family, they uh. Think the term here is “religious fanatics”? (Laughs) Like straight up drank the Kool-Aid, think all sinners are going to Hell, burn in eternal damnation and all that.
Dr. Ashton: But you don’t believe in any of that.
RT: Of course not! I mean, c’mon. It’s 2019. You’d think that by now people can think for themselves.
Dr. Ashton: So it sounds like your family, they have some views you don’t agree with. And it’s causing issues in your relationship. Have you thought about putting some distance? Between you and them.
RT: Yeah. We talked about moving outta this place, to New York or maybe Seattle. That would be nice, I think. Different. But my mom, she uh. Well she has Alzheimer's. And I know in a few years she’s not going to… going to all be there. I know, right? If she knew I were gay she’d tell me I’m going to burn in Hell without even blinking. But she’s still my mom. Woman who raised me. Must be all that Catholic guilt in me. (Laughs)
Dr. Ashton: Tell me about your partner. How’d you two meet?
RT: Grindr. Romantic right? (Laughs) Neither of us were really looking for anything serious, but when you’re one of like 100 gay men within a 50 mile radius and you meet someone you actually click with? It was just supposed to be drinks, our first date. Then one bar turned to two, then three, and before you know it, it’s 4 in the morning and we’re getting burgers and milkshakes at Denny’s. I think the both of us knew what we had found.
Dr. Ashton: And how’s the relationship been? Any issues besides…
RT: Besides the one thing that’d destroy my relationship with my family? Ha! Things are nice, they’ve been good. I work nights and he works a 9 to 5 so our schedules don’t always line up but… we make it work.
Dr. Ashton: Am I sensing some hesitation there?
RT: Nothing gets past you doctor.
Dr. Ashton: Please, call me Gabriel.
RT: Oh uh, sure. But yeah it’s just that… okay so, I like my job. I work security at the hospital and I know it’s not the most prestigious thing in the world and I’m not making the big bucks. But I like it. I’ve always been more of uh, more of a night owl. And I really like my coworkers, y’know? It just feels familiar to me.
Dr. Ashton: Mhm.
RT: But M. He… he wants me to quit. To find something with more “normal hours”.
Dr. Ashton: Why does he want that?
RT: I guess it’s because he wants us to spend more time together? I don’t know. I think it’s sweet that he wants to see me more. We don’t live together right now and uh, it’s really only the weekends when we can see each other.
Dr. Ashton: And you’re okay with that? Only seeing him on the weekends?
RT: I mean, no. I want to see him more too. But it’s my job, you know? I’m not just gonna quit my job. And well, to be honest I’ve always had the feeling that… that he…
Dr. Ashton: That he?
RT: … that he looks down on it? I’m not sure. I don’t know if it’s in my head or… He’s never said anything to me, just wanna be clear. But when we’re out with his friends, he makes these little… little comments. Am I making any sense?
Dr. Ashton: Can you give an example? Of these comments.
RT: Yeah like uh, he’ll say stuff about how he’s the sugar daddy in the relationship. Jokingly, of course. He does make a lot more than me. What with his fancy remote job. We’re not living together right now but it’s something we've talked about. And I know you have to discuss finances before moving in with someone, I get that. But he’s always bringing up how he wants a partner to contribute equally to bills, that he doesn’t want to be supporting anyone. I get all of that! But it’s just something about the way he says it…
Dr. Ashton: Do you feel like these comments are digs at your character? At you?
RT: Honestly? Yeah I do. Like if he has a problem with how much I’m making, just tell me. We’re both adults right? Gotta communicate and all that?
Dr. Ashton: It almost sounds like he’s ashamed of you.
RT: You know what? I think that’s exactly it. I think he might be ashamed of me.
Dr. Ashton: So M, he wants you to tell your family about your relationship, even though that’s not what you want to do.
RT: …yeah….
Dr. Ashton: And he looks down on your job, makes these comments in front of his friends. Do you ever wonder what he says to them when you’re not there?
RT: Well…
Dr. Ashton: R, it sounds like people have always been telling you what to do, your family telling you what to believe in, M telling you that you need to go to therapy, you need to find a different job. Doesn’t that get exhausting?
RT: …
Dr. Ashton: It sounds exhausting to me. Can I tell you something that I learned way too late in life?
RT: What’s that?
Dr. Ashton: “No” is a complete sentence. It’s okay to set boundaries, especially with those closest to you.
RT: I… I guess you’re right.
Dr. Ashton: And R? I don’t know if anyone’s ever told you this, or even if you think this about yourself. But I’m going to tell you right now, that you are enough.
RT: No one’s ever said that to me.
Dr. Ashton: Can you say it to yourself right now?
RT: Ha. Yeah uh, I… I am enough?
Dr. Ashton: There are always going to be outside influences R, like a close-minded family or a partner that doesn’t see your potential. But what’s important is that you see it in yourself. Because I see it in you. I see a man who has passion for what he does, who values the bonds of family, who desires to love and to be loved. A man who’s deserving.
RT: I… I’ve never really thought of myself in that way Dr. Ash– Gabriel.
Dr. Ashton: Well, that’s what I’m here for, R. To offer a new perspective. To help you see these things that you might not even have known.
RT: Wow, yeah. I mean. I just… You’ve given me a lot to think about. Really.
Dr. Ashton: And right on schedule, it looks like our time is up. I’ll be seeing you again next week? Same time?
RT: Yeah. Yeah I think I’ll be seeing you again.
END TRANSCRIPT
I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t nice to hear my father’s voice again. A longing I didn’t even know I had. It had been so many years, yet hearing him brought me back to chasing ice cream trucks in the summer, flying kites on those especially windy days.
The therapy session itself, I’m no expert but it was a little weird, right? A little too personal? If anyone has more experience with this I’d love to know your thoughts because I plan on going through all of these tapes.

Our residency program has recently been gathering signatures about forming a union and are now moving forward with an official union vote. So far, the only "official" statement made by our GME has been vague but mostly unsupportive, stating that our benefits are on par or above surrounding programs, which isn't true. A few days ago, we got a weird mass email claiming to be a group of "Concerned UB Residents" laying out a long list of statements against forming a union. I've quoted the entire email below for you to read. A few things started setting off alarm bells that this email actually came from GME. First, it came from an email titled "UB House Staff" and the email is [email protected]. It just so happens that the official email for the group starting the union is [email protected] and also shows up as "UB House Staff." The bigger red flag was the use of the resident list serv. We residents don't have access to this, only GME. One resident even tried using the list serv to send a test email and got a delivery failure response. So how could this email come from a resident if the GME is the only office with access to the list serv? And then there's this little tidbit:

• "P.S. We expect there will be accusations of our collusion with GME or other leadership. Rest assured we are concerned fellow residents with no affiliation with UB GME and are acting independently without their knowledge. We chose to remain anonymous just as the organizers of the union chose to remain anonymous for risk of personal and/or professional ramifications."

They knew we would suspect something, so they added specifically that GME doesn't know about this email, which again, is false because they slipped up and used the list serv. So at best, a resident wrote this and got GME approval to use the list serv. But at worst, and more probable in my mind, is that GME is trying to subvert the upcoming union vote. Not as scandalous as the Loma Linda Union efforts, but still pretty messed up.
For reference, here's our salary compared to nearby programs.
"According to information on the UB Office of Graduate Medical Education's website, the salary schedule for medical residents, as of Jan. 1, ranges from $57,492 for postgraduate year one to $65,067 for postgraduate year seven.
By comparison, at the University of Rochester, that same postgraduate range for the 2023-24 year is $63,870 to $79,084, according to the university's website. The range at Albany Medical College, meanwhile, is $67,917 for postgraduate year one and $71,758 for postgraduate year seven."

Dear UB Housestaff,
We have all recently received communications regarding unionization and collective bargaining. The individuals behind these emails paint a perfect picture of all the benefits of unionization and collective bargaining. What they fail to disclose are any of the potential negative aspects of forming a union. The following will hopefully shed light on some facts or considerations they are withholding.
1.Union Dues - The ONLY guarantee of forming a union is that you will pay union dues. New York is unfortunately NOT a right-to-work state, and you will be forced to pay dues regardless of your decision to join the union. Other local healthcare unions (nursing, ancillary staff, etc.) are paying in Buffalo are $38-90 per pay period or $1000-2300 per year according to personal reports. Keep in mind UAPD is not doing this for free, they have a financial incentive for this to pass. If our dues START at 0.9%, UAPD will receive approximately $400,000 per year on the first contract. They will very likely include a clause in our contract to the right to re-negotiate our dues in the next contract if they decide they want more money. Given money is the center of this entire movement, I think you can deduce their incentive and likelihood of increasing dues.
2.Salary – Our salary is paid via Medicare (CMS) funding of our intern, resident, fellow positions. This is a set figure per resident. There is no indication Medicare funding is changing. To raise our salaries, GME will have to pull money from within GME budgets, thus it is unclear where they are expecting to generate this extra income to raise our salaries “$6000-8000” that is being rumored. That being said, what are the chances of us actually getting a salary raise, much less one that will offset our dues payments? The only guarantee is an additional layer of administration and another hand in the pot taking out money in the form of dues.
3.Benefits – A housing stipend is one of the benefits that seems to be requested. The cost of living has certainly increased over the past few years, but Buffalo doesn’t compare to high cost of living areas such as NYC, LA, etc. In the eyes of the IRS there is no tax benefit of receiving a housing stipend vs. increased salary. The money would also have to come from the same pool of money as our salary. This would simply be semantics of asking for a “housing allowance.” We already have some of the best healthcare plans in the region and pay $0 in premiums. FSA and dependent care savings accounts are available to offset these costs as well.
4.Training Duration – Depending on your position, whether you are an intern, resident, or fellow, the duration of training is 1 year for interns, 3 years for most medical specialties, 5 years for most surgical specialties, or 7 years for neurosurgery. Most union contracts are negotiated for 3–5-year terms. For many of you, these contracts won’t change during your time of employment, and you may not see the supposed “benefits” of collective bargaining. In contrast, the raise we recently received, although not as much as we wanted, was successfully negotiated over the course of a year or so.
5.Working Conditions – Residents from all programs were likely affected by the recent blizzard in December 2022. While we may have technically violated ACGME work hours, these were emergency circumstances and not the norm. ACGME governs the vast majority of our working conditions and largely prevents the abuse of residents. It’s unclear what more benefit in working conditions a union could provide.
6.COVID19 Healthcare Worker Bonus – This program by NY state intended to compensate front-line workers for their efforts during the pandemic. The language of the law as it was initially written excluded our program based on our employment model. This was no fault of GME, but the state legislators. THANKS to UB GME collaboration with NY state, we recently received notice that we should be receiving the bonus soon.
7.Representation – The union is required to bargain on behalf of all residents regardless of whether it benefits you as an individual or your individual program. For example, the CSEA union at ECMC is composed of X-Ray Technologists, ACCs, Respiratory Therapists, Surgical Technologists, but they only account for 15% of the union. The other 85% is composed of Erie County clerical staff located in a government building downtown, completely unrelated to healthcare. Because of this, those ECMC employees didn’t receive the same COVID benefits as other ancillary staff at ECMC and have a very small voice in their union. As it relates to our cause, different specialties have different needs. For example, the Family Medicine residents have different needs, requirements, and expectations than the Neurosurgery residents. The same argument could likely be made for each specialty comparison. Interns, residents, and fellows are at different levels of training and also may have different needs. The union cannot take these individual considerations into account when they are bargaining for the group as a whole. A union will only complicate the relationship with your individual program and limit the ability to make resident-driven changes within your program. Is collective bargaining really worth the trade-off of adding in administrative oversight and losing specialty independence within your program?
8.Leverage – There is a lack of leverage from residents. Hopefully most residents are here because we love our profession. The unions use the work force as leverage. If a strike is mandated, depending on the duration, this could impact the duration of your resident training. Accrediting bodies for each specialty frequently implement time requirements for specific rotations, or overall duration of training. If you fail to meet these requirements, your training may be extended. This could affect your sequence of training by delaying your next residency or fellowship appointment. Or cost you a month of salary as an attending, which would very likely exceed the potential salary increase the union is seeking during your residency. Is a union rumoring an additional $6000-8000 salary worth giving up a few months or a year of attending salary if you get off-track? This could be a costly $200-700K depending on your specialty.
9.Burnout – The UB Housestaff website frequently cite burnout as one of the concerns unionization can address. There was a recent national study of general surgery residents comparing burnout amongst unionized and non-unionized programs. There was no difference in burnout between the two groups. The presence of a union does not change the rate of burnout. One of the only differences was the amount of vacation days, 4 weeks vs 2-3 weeks. We already have 4 weeks of vacation per year, without a union. The only other difference in the study was a housing stipend, which would likely not significantly offset the union dues. The article PDF is attached for your reference (link: doi:10.1001/jamanetworkopen.2021.23412).
10.Politics – Unions are almost synonymous with politics on a local, state and national level. According to opensecrets.org, unions spent $52,000,000 in lobbying in 2022. How certain are you that your dues will not be used for political gain? The politics of a union also creates additional complexity to your already busy residency. It may create additional barriers to otherwise simple changes residents may want within their programs. For example, if your residency isn’t well represented in the union or doesn’t align with union leadership, how can you ensure your concerns will be treated with equal weight? Hopefully these counterpoints bring attention to the many potential downsides of implementing a union for UB residents. There is certainly a pay discrepancy when comparing UB to other regional residencies. However, with continued conversations and collaboration with GME, we could likely have continued improvement in salary. Again, forming a union DOES NOT GUARANTEE a salary increase, it only guarantees an automatic withdrawal of union dues from your existing salary regardless of your willingness to participate.
Voting on this matter is of utmost importance. The implementation of a union is dependent only on votes cast. The winning party must achieve 50% plus 1 vote of all votes cast, NOT of all constituents. Every vote counts! Please carefully consider your options and potential implications when casting your ballot. Once a union is in place, it is exceedingly difficult to disband the union, especially in New York.
Regards,
Concerned UB Residents
P.S. We expect there will be accusations of our collusion with GME or other leadership. Rest assured we are concerned fellow residents with no affiliation with UB GME and are acting independently without their knowledge. We chose to remain anonymous just as the organizers of the union chose to remain anonymous for risk of personal and/or professional ramifications.

"You're hired!" - Sen. Kyrsten Sinema's (I-AZ) predictable response to a Republican lobbyist showering her with praise

Moving The Troll-Post

As we near the end of this week of will-Trump-finally-go-to-jail limbo, one question remains: What the hell?

• Manhattan prosecutors said today that Trump misled people to expect he would be arrested this week, which is what prompted congressional Republicans to attempt to interfere with their investigation of his well-established hush-money payments to adult film actress Stormy Daniels. On Saturday, Trump announced that he believed he would be “arrested” this week, which prompted the most unhinged Republicans on the House Oversight Committee to write a letter to Manhattan district attorney Alvin Bragg demanding that he testify before Congress about what the House GOP wants everyone to believe is a “politicized” investigation.
  
• Bragg shot back forcefully Thursday, with a letter signed by his office’s general counsel Leslie Dubeck calling the House GOP request “an unprecedented inquiry into a pending local prosecution.” It should also be noted, as we reported yesterday, that Trump used his “poor me I might be going to jail for doing crimes” grift to raise $1.5 million from his supporters in three days.
  
• Dubeck aptly noted that the letter from the House GOP loonies “only came after Donald Trump created a false expectation that he would be arrested the next day and his lawyers reportedly urged [GOP leadership] to intervene.” House Speaker Kevin McCarthy also called on his committee chairmen to harass Bragg, which, if you ask us, doesn’t seem like typical Speaker of the House business.
  

Did we get trolled, once again, by America’s Troll-in-Chief?

• It kind of looks that way. The man is a subject of at least four different criminal investigations in three different jurisdictions (federally, by DOJ, and locally, by the Fulton County, GA, and Manhattan district attorneys) and yet he still was able to command everyone’s attention and get everyone focused on the least-serious crimes he may be tried for because he knows how to work the media and the media is all too ready to let him.
  
• But not everyone is willing to let Trump be the ringmaster of his own circus. Lewis Kaplan, the federal judge presiding over the defamation case brought by former New York City columnist E. Jean Caroll against Trump, has decided to use an anonymous jury, specifically because of Trump’s history of attacking “courts, judges, various law enforcement officials and other public officials, and even individual jurors in other matters.” The trial is scheduled to begin on April 25, and Trump continues to deny the charges against him, as he denies everything else related to reality.
  

The unpleasant truth about Trump (is there any other kind?) is that if he is indicted, even if he is convicted (!), he can still run for president. In a normal political party, it would be more difficult for an indicted candidate or convicted criminal to win votes, but we know the GOP is pretty okay with that sort of thing.

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Under The Radar

With perhaps the notable exception of New York Times columnist Bret Stephens, most people admit that the United States’s invasion of Iraq stemmed from a mishmash of lies, intelligence failures, intelligence manipulations, and one of the greatest, deadliest errors of judgment in modern history. Two decades later, the disastrous Iraq War continues to cast a long shadow over America’s spy agencies. Iraq spurred a major reorganization of the intelligence community, which demoted CIA from its oversight role over the other agencies, and the implementation of reforms that would allow analysts to more critically evaluate sources and better assess possible bias in conclusions. The hollow echoes of “weapons of mass destruction” still ring in the ears of millions of Americans, and the U.S. intelligence community still has not fully recovered from the deserved demolition of its credibility. Russia’s war in Ukraine has provided the IC an opportunity to rehabilitate its shattered reputation by correctly anticipating the invasion and supplying good information to Kyiv throughout the conflict, but it also incorrectly assessed that Ukraine’s forces would fall within weeks.

What Else?

The father of one of the teenage victims of the Parkland shooting was arrested today during a hearing on gun regulations for yelling at a Republican congressman who was saying typical Republican congressman shit about guns.
South Carolina’s Republican comptroller general (the state’s top accountant) will resign next month after making a $3.5 billion error in the year-end financial report he oversaw.
The Bank of England announced today that it will hike interest rates an additional one-quarter of a percentage point.
Twitter announced that on April 1, it will terminate its “legacy verified” program that allowed long-verified accounts to maintain their verified status without paying for the new subscription service. Organizations will have to pay $1,000 to maintain account verification. It’s like no one has any goddamn respect for April Fools’ Day anymore.
The CEO of TikTok was grilled in a congressional hearing Thursday by lawmakers of both parties, who believe the app is a surveillance and propaganda tool of the Chinese Communist Party and also addictive and damaging to children’s developing brains.
All schools in New York’s Hilton Central School District were evacuated Wednesday after receiving a bomb threat related to books depicting LGBT+ characters and information in the school library. Thanks again, Republicans!
The Nebraska state Legislature voted Thursday to advance a hotly contested bill that would ban gender-affirming care for minors in the state, in defiance of Democratic Sens. Megan Hunt and Machaela Cavanaugh who have promised to filibuster every bill for the rest of the 90-day legislative session
The Biden Administration will invite around 120 countries to join next week’s Summit for Democracy, but Turkey and Hungary will not be on the list.
In one of the largest randomized studies of American transgender adults ever conducted, the majority of trans adults reported that transitioning made them more satisfied with their lives.

What In The World?

Kyiv’s top commander of ground forces said Thursday that Ukraine will launch a long-awaited counteroffensive “very soon” after four months on the defensive. Ukrainian forces and its cities and towns have absorbed Russia’s brutal winter attacks, and now reports indicate that Russian mercenaries “are losing considerable strength and are running out of steam,” as they have not yet taken the crucial city of Bakhmut. Reuters journalists stationed in the areas surrounding the city reported seeing evidence consistent with the claim that the Russian offensive is running out of gas. Ukrainian president Volodymyr Zelenskyy toured the front lines throughout this week, visiting troops near Bakhmut on Wednesday and those in the Kherson region in the south on Thursday.

What A Sponsor

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Light At The End Of The Email

Joe Biden’s 2024 reelection campaign staff will be unionized!
Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-VT) introduced legislation today that would block bank executives from failed banks like Silicon Valley Banks from serving on regional Federal Reserve boards that regulate the banking industry.
The Federal Trade Commission proposed a rule that would require sellers to make it easier for consumers to cancel their enrollment in subscription services or anything that requires recurring payments.

Enjoy

graham on Twitter: "no one has ever looked more on trial for a skiing incident"

This post is specific to the 2024 GMC Sierra model year's 2500HD and 3500HD aka Heavy Duty versions. I'll include info on all trims. If you're looking for 1500 series models, some discounts below might be interestingvbut fair warning: most everything else is about the HD series trucks.
I've been watching all the news, spy shots, auto shows, press releases and can't wait to see this truck in person. Until then, I've been researching like crazy. Because I'm a nerd. Figured some other people might be like me, looking for all the quality updates, videos, pics, and (eventually^{I can't wait}) reviews - so why not put them all in one place. Here goes...

Official stuff

• GMC's Sierra 2500HD Homepage / Model Details
• Build and Price
• GMC's press release
• Ultimate Heavy Duty press release
• PDFs of all the trims, packages, option codes: https://www.gmfleetorderguide.com
• Video: 2024 Sierra HD: First Ever Sierra HD Denali Ultimate GMC

Track Your Order

Automated Method

1. Go to www.GMC.com >> click black "Message Us" icon in bottom right corner. If you don't see, adblockers and pi-hole will break it; disable and refresh page.
2. Reply to the first message with Hi (this will have an automated reply) >> type order status >> when prompted for your six-digit order number (it might be alphanumeric) type that into chat.
3. It will tell you order status in plain English. It will not provide dates or Event Codes.

Live Agent Method

1. Follow the steps in Automated Method above. At end, type Agent >> the system will automatically reply saying it'll transfer you to someone that can help. You can only do this during US business hours, otherwise chat will say they are closed and tell you to return the next day.
2. Once an actual person replies, ask them to provide the status of your order. They may ask for the order number. In theory though, they should already see it from the steps earlier in the chat.
3. They will give you a brief explanation of your order status.
4. Reply by saying, "Can you please provide me with the event code on the order?" They'll most likely provide the code on the fist ask. If not, be firm and polite. If they still decline, close the chat and try again in a week.

• GM quotes 6 to 12 weeks from order to delivery at dealership, barring any unforseen delays.
• They won't provide more detailed order updates until you reach Event Code 3400 or greater.
• At code 3800 or greater, you have a VIN assigned. Dealership ONLY can login to VinView to track the realtime location of your vehicle using the OnStar's GPS as identified by your VIN number. It shows the location history of the vehicle since it left the factory.
• OrdeEvent Codes are listed here (backup).
• Order info is updated 1x/week on Thursdays. No sense in asking more frequently.

Pricing

• GMC Supplier Discount website
• Check if you're eligible (here) aka work for a company that gets this. There's a ton. It's worth trying. Look up your company here, grab the code, then make a free account and use that code. It's crazy simple.
• The Supplier version Build/Price tools aren't online for 2024 models, but you can do it anyway just use the one depending on your model:
  • Sierra 2500 HD
  • Sierra 2500 HD Denali
  • Sierra 3500 HD
  • Sierra 3500 HD Denali
• GMC Friends and Family Discount website
• The Friends & Family version Build/Price tools aren't online for 2024 models, but you can do it anyway just use the one depending on your model:
  • Sierra 2500 HD
  • Sierra 2500 HD Denali
  • Sierra 3500 HD
  • Sierra 3500 HD Denali
• Dealers do not have to accept Friends&Family or Supplier pricing. They are reimbursed partially by GM, so in effect are taking some hit by accepting it. Hence, why so many turned away buyers during pandemic.
• In Feb 2023, GM idled its Fort Wayne, Indiana production for two weeks (source) because inventories of 1500 series reached 100 days. That's above their stated goal of 50-60 days of inventory. At year-end 2022 inventories were at 50 days. TL;DR supplies of light duty trucks have outstripped demand, and I'd hope that means good news for pricing now and into 2Q.

​

Engine	Denali Ultimate	Denali	AT4	SLT	SLE	Pro
MSRP 6.6L V8 Gas w/ 4WD (starting at)	n/a	$75,095	$70,995	$65,195	$57,795	$52,795
MSRP 6.6L V8 Turbo-Diesel w/ 4WD (starting at)	$93,795	$84,585	$80,485	$74,685	$68,280	$63,780

Discounts

• Dealerships that have told me they're honoring Supplier Pricing
  • Laura GMC (website) in Collinsville, IL
  • Beck & Masten (website) in Houston, TX
• Dealerships offering discounted pricing to anyone. Does not stack with Supplier or Friends and Family though.
  • Laura GMC (website): $2,500 off MSRP. Will ship car to you (at your expense). Free shuttle pickup from airport, if you fly in.
  • Beck & Masten (website): $2,000 off MSRP + free delivery within 500 miles
• Costco discount / Costco Auto Program Savings Event. I don't know what it is (will be?) for 2024, but was $1,000 off for 2022 and 2023 models (source, also mentioned on a few forums and in askcarsales).
• Uber - discount for Uber drivers. In past was $2,750 off BoltEV, no idea if anything for Sierra models and if so, if even for this model year.

Reviews

I mean, it's about the best info we've got from the bigger websites

• 2024 GMC Sierra HD Preview [JD Power]
• 2024 GMC Sierra 2500HD [Car Buzz]
• 2024 GMC Sierra 2500 [Cars.com]
• 2024 GMC Sierra HD Brings the Luxury and the Muscle [Car and Driver]
• 2024 GMC Sierra 2500 and 3500 HD First Look: Denali Goes Ultimate, AT4X Joins the Ranks [Motor Trend]
• 2024 GMC Sierra HD: High Luxury Meets High Limits [Edmunds]
• Hope You’re Ready: The 2024 GMC Sierra HD Now Tops Out Over $100,000 [The Fast Lane Truck]
• 2024 GMC Sierra HD Debuts As Part Workhorse And Part Luxury Vehicle [Car Scoops]
• 2024 GMC Sierra HD Looks Sharper, Picks Up Fancy New Denali Ultimate Trim [CNet]
• 2024 GMC Sierra HD Gets Engine Upgrades, Towing Aids, Two New Trims [The Drive]

Videos

ProTip browser extensions: SponsorBlock auto-skips intros, comment/like/subscribe junk. uBlock Origin eliminates all YouTube ads.

• By GMC: 2024 Sierra HD: First Ever Sierra HD Denali Ultimate GMC
• - First dealership to get a truck (3/22)

Official GM private event/unveiling, hands-on w/ senior GM design team

• Here Is Why the New 2024 GMC Sierra HD Is the MOST Luxurious Truck Ever Built! [The Fast Lane Truck]
• 2024 GMC Sierra HD In Depth look with all the Experts [Pushing Pistons]
• Four In-Depth Interviews! 2024 GMC Sierra HD Revealed! [Pickup Truck Plus SUV Talk]
• 2024 GMC Sierra HD First Look [Alex on Autos]
• The NEW 2024 GMC SIERRA 2500HD / 3500HD is AMAZING! [GM Jeff]
• Interviewing the GMC TEAM about the NEW 2024 GMC Sierra 2500 & 3500 HD! [GM Jeff]

At various auto shows

• 2024 GMC Sierra 2500 AT4 [DeLo Enterprises]
• 2024 GMC Sierra 2500 Denali Ultimate Edition [DeLo Enterprises]
• 2024 GMC Sierra 2500HD Denali Ultimate Full Review and Walkaround CLE Auto Show [Cochran GMC dealership]
• 2024 GMC Sierra 2500 HD Denali Ultimate at the Chicago Auto Show [Garage Talk]
• Hands On - The 2024 Duramax GMC Sierra AT4 Now Tows 4000 Pounds More & Goes Off-Road! [TFLnow]
• NEW, 2024 GMC Sierra 2500HD AT4, Duramax! [GM Jeff]
• 2024 GMC Sierra 2500 HD Denali Ultimate // $100k Ultimate CAPABILITY & LUXURY! [Car Confections]
• 2024 GMC Sierra 2500 HD - Did GMC Make The RIGHT Changes? [Vehicle Visionary]
• 2024 GMC Sierra 2500HD Denali Ultimate New Interior, Refreshed Exterior! [Cars Made Simple]
• 2500 HD Ultimate Denali 2024 GMC Sierra 4x4 Truck [InterUnetAutomotive]
• New 2024 GMC Sierra 2500 HD Denali Ultimate [GM Jeff]
• 2024 GMC Sierra 2500 Denali Ultimate Nightshade HD Very Luxurious [Express Car Reviews]

News

• GM Authority: Sierra HD news. Note: Skip the comments section on their articles. It's straight cancer.
• Prior sales numbers here.

Gallery

• https://www.gmc.com/trucks/sierra/2500hd-3500hd
• https://gmauthority.com/blog/gm/gmc/sierra/2024-gmc-sierra/2024-gmc-sierra-hd/ >> scroll down and click "Gallery" it expands with a ton more pics than GM has in link above.

Other conversations w/ recent intel on 2024 Sierra 2500HD's

• Relevant search of askcarsales: https://old.reddit.com/askcarsales/search/?q=2024+sierra+2500hd&include_over_18=on&restrict_sr=on&t=all&sort=new
• DuramaxForum: thread on 2024 HD's
• Leasehackr forum: https://forum.leasehackr.com/search?q=2024%20sierra%202500
• GM-Trucks.com forum: https://www.gm-trucks.com/forums/forum/240-2020-2024-silverado-hd-sierra-hd/

Latest info I've heard

• Downpour Metallic paint color is delayed, marked "late availability". Any orders with this color are delayed for likely months, but dealers don't have exact timing.
• Best discount is $2,500 off MSRP (at Laura GMC)
• Costco discount does stack with other discounts
• $1,500 OnStar Premium is included in vehicle price, but for the first time can be Deleted for $1,500 savings.
• GMC MultiPro tailgate Step Lights are a $150 option, even on Denali Ultimate. Wut!?
• For Super Cruise to work, need OnStar. But it's an add on feature, for ANY plan. Pricing is here, skip the BS graphic and click on Compare All Plans which gives you this PDF. Tl;DR in build options choose OnStar Premium Delete ($1,500 savings), then after get truck choose plan you want. Cheapest one, "Remote Access" for $14.99/month, gives you the app and "remote key fob" then just inlcude Super Cruise add-on for $25/month. Also: this still fees like a ripoff.
• CarbonPro bed isn't available on Heavy Duty series trucks, irregardless of trim.
• OEM Upfitter switches will be available (here >> GMUpfitter.com) and go in the "change pocket" area (pic), directly in front of new Trailer Brake controls placement.
• First dealership to have a 2500HD arrive was on Mar 22nd: Tom Kelley GMC in Fort Wayne, IN. They put up a youtube video here.
• Bigger GMC dealerships have been telling custs expect first trucks arrive on lots May 2023.
• The tailgate Step Lights do work even if have Kicker audio systems in tailgate. There's small knockout holes in the center two square panels above the Kicker controls, and the lights go in there. If you don't have the Kicker system, the lights sit in a similar square plate with knockout hole, just rest of panel is blank. Without the audio system, the lights are in the outer two tailgate holes. If have speakers, lights go in inner two holes, as speakers take up the outer two holes.

If I missed anything, please share! Just really like this truck, ordered one, can't wait for arrival. I am not in the car business, affiliated with any sites. Linked only to legit, high-quality sources that were best I could find, avoided the dumb Chinese bot knockoff YouTube channels and blogspam that just steal content. If you find some new juicy tidbits, please reply so we can all benefit.

Here are the goodies.

Small haul this week with mostly clearance items.
 

Total: $16.45

Coupons: None

Total Cash Back: $24.26

Final Cost: -$7.81 - Money Maker!

^{Photo of the haul.}
 
Here is the complete break down and sites used. The stores are listed in the breakdown image. I don't include sites that take any receipt such as Coinout, ReceiptPal, etc on my breakdown. Brandclub takes a while to credit, so the amounts listed are what I expect to get once it finishes pending.
Note: Individual deals vary by user for most apps. If you don't have the deals right now, you can try checking back later.
 
My Guides

1. All rebate apps/sites I use and/or know about
   
2. How I do my hauls
   
3. Beginners guide to using rebate apps/sites - for those who don't know where to start
   

 
If you aren't interested in this kind of thing, please keep your comments to yourself. If you don't like what I buy, you can buy different products. If you don't like hunting for deals, you can do surveys, microtasks, games or whatever else you like instead. There is no need to discourage other users just because you aren't interested in the same things!
 
Some additional deals:

• Free T is for Tame hair taming product
• Gatorade Fast Twitch Energy Drink - $2.18 at Wal-Mart - $0.75 IB + $1 Fetch
• Dollar Shave - Lots of deals on Fetch + SK + IB
• Revlon Illuminance Foundation - $13.48 at Wal-Mart - $7 IB + $4 coupons.com
• Revlon Eyeliner - $4 IB + $3 coupons.com
• Hefty Sliders - $2/2 coupons.com + $2/2 IB
• Bic EasyRinse Razors - $6.92 at Wal-Mart - $3 IB + $3 coupons.com
• Skintimate - $6.47 at Wal-Mart - $2 IB + $4 coupons.com
• Glad trash bags on SB + IB
• McCain Quick Cook Fries - C51 & coupons.com
• Alexia Fries - IB & C51
  
• Califia Farms Almond Milk - IB + Merryfield + BC
  
• Tostitos Toppers - $3.68 at my Wal-Mart. $1.25 IB + $1 Fetch + Possible BC surveys
  
• Aussie Shampoo - IB + coupons.com
  
• Sargento Cheese - IB + Fetch
  
• Zarbees Buy 2 and get $5 or Buy 3 and get $10
  
• Baby Dove Wipes 20ct - Money maker after SB
  
• Jergens Natural Glow - Money maker on IB for the little containers
  
• Microban Bathroom Cleaner - $4 at Wal-Mart with $0.50 IB + BC surveys up to $1.60
  
• Deodorant - Lots of deodorant deals for Dove, Degree, Gillette, etc on IB, SK, Fetch
  
• $13 Movie Reward when you buy 3 participating Kellogg's products - Good towards The Way of Water or any other Disney movie at Fandango partner theaters in the U.S. Limit 3. Expires 3/31/23
  
• Free Pedialyte - expires 7/31/23 - This is also on IB for $1
  
• "Free Kellogg's Breakfast" when you buy a participating Kellogg's Product - $5 coupon for a Kellogg's Breakfast Item when you buy a participating Kellogg's Product. Limit 3. Expires 5/9/23. There's also a lot of offers on IB that it can be paired with.
  
• Dave's Bread - $8.99 back when you buy 3 - Expires 5/16/23
  
• Free bag of Like Air Puffcorn - Refund via PayPal or Venmo. Must purchase in-store or for curbside pickup. Expiration date unknown.
  
• Nightfood Ice Cream - Free pint. Expiration date unknown.
  
• Various freebies on Ibotta.
  
• Various offers on Aisle Referrals: SkinTe Core Bar Proper Good Meals (using my ref will give me another rebate offer) Pays out via PayPal or Venmo
  
• Various deals I've done in previous weeks can still be done.
  

 

Afterthoughts

Just a small haul this week, which is expected with a small bonus. I originally was going to grab a few different deals, but there were all kinds of new items on clearance this week and luckily a few had rebates.
 
Unrelated to this haul, but I got an email about a $10 bonus from Capital One when I install their extension and sign up for their Shopping program. It's just another one of those extensions that shows coupons, rebates, and compares prices. There doesn't seem to be any purchase requirements. So, if you're a Capital One member, check your email for one titled "Complimentary for you, [name]! You can get a $10 bonus and exclusive free discounts and rewards."
 

Time Spent

I spent around 15 minutes or so glancing through the apps while waiting at the doctor's office. I was in the store for about 40 minutes, which was mostly me doing my regular shopping and browsing through the clearance items mainly looking for non-deal items.
 

Food From Deals

I made a few Peanut Butter Banana Sandwiches this week.
 
Do you guys want me to continue showing things I've made using ingredients I got from rebate apps on these posts? Let me know in the comments, or you can vote on this poll if you want to remain anonymous.

The end of ECBW concludes as the end of Summit begins. Let's close out with the Ultimate newcomers.

• Victory must come from a major (defined by Liquipedia). Sorry if you beat a top player at a local or whatever. (JAPAN 24 was recently demoted, so I'll probably go back and edit any entries once the whole roster is covered)
  
• Every won game of the set must be by that character. So for example Proto's win on Riddles at Summit 5 is ineligible as he won a game with Lucina and two with Min Min, but his win on Sparg0 is fine since he lost the only game he went Lucina.
  
• Set must be a BO5 (exceptions may be made for honorable mentions, sometimes out of necessity). Unfortunately, Japan suffers the most from this as even some of their majors had BO3 grands.
  
• Honorable mentions aren't necessarily the next best options, moreso used to highlight other matches and players though exceptions may apply.
  
• Lists like these are subjective and primarily serves as a smorgasbord of matches for the entire roster showcasing their peaks. If you feel like I missed a set or know of one that deserves a spot, let me know in the comments (constructively)!
  

Here you can see the previous posts here for the 64 fighters, Melee fighters, Brawl fighters, and Smash 4 fighters.

Inkling INKLING - Space vs. Glutonny, Ultimate Fighting Arena 2019 - Top 12

This character used to be good. They still are (kinda), but they used to be, too. Space and Cosmos were the original Inkling duo (and both coincidentally also use Aegis now). But while Cosmos stacked the top 8 placements, Space was one of few European brethren to claim victory over the continent's best player in Gluto. To put into perspective the emperor's stranglehold on EU at the time, UFA - which happened in October 2019 - was only the second European event where Gluto losing to someone in winners actually meant something (and the first time it wasn't even from an EU player, it was Shuton). Also shoutouts to the French commentators, y'all make me wanna run through a brick wall with the amount of hype and love you put into your casts. Keep up the great work!
Honorable Mention: Cosmos vs. Nairo, Genesis 6 - Top 64 - Starting off his Ultimate career as an Inkling main, Cosmos picked up many top player wins in 2019.
Honorable Mention: Cosmos vs. Dabuz, Get On My Level 2019 - Top 12 - A five game slugfest against Dabuz capped off another top 8 run at his 7th straight major of Cosmos, one of the earliest streaks.
Honorable Mention: Shirayuki vs. HERO, MaesumaTOP#9 - Winners Quarters - Shirayuki from Japan has the highest honor of the highest placement for Inkling: 2nd place at MaesumaTOP#9.

Ridley RIDLEY - Mezcaul vs. Sisqui, Temple: Hermes Edition - Top 24

Ridley finally got into Smash, and was rewarded for his patience by...being pretty bad. French Ridley Mezcaul has made the most of his situation, with a handful of top 16 appearances and even a top 8 showing at Ultimate WANTED #3. The creme de la creme of his (and Ridley's) wins has to be Sisqui, which happened at Temple: Hermes. What is there to talk about without the recording? The lore implications? Oh Metroid Prime got remastered recently, highly recommend if you've never played it. If Skyjay showed us anything at Collision, it's that character loyalists can get rewarded with breakout runs. Perhaps the character deemed "too big for Smash" has a big run waiting in its future.
Honorable Mention: Mezcaul vs. Larry Lurr, Ultimate WANTED #3 - Top 12 - Larry Lurr might be the spacies overlord but was no match for this space pirate.
Honorable Mention: Mezcaul vs. Flow, 95 Kings of Fields 2 - Top 24 - Even though Ridley is a dragon, Roy could not defeat his canon final boss this time around.
Honorable Mention: Nair^ vs. EKING, Smash Factor 9 - Top 48 - Mexican Ridley main Nair^ has little majors to his name, but is here to break up the monotony of Mezcaul.

SimonRichter SIMON & RICHTER - T3 DOM vs. Dabuz, Summit 5 - Gauntlet Phase

The Belmont boys have been fielded by a handful of players throughout history. Some made top 16, some down air a Pikmin, and some are Squidplumber. But T3 DOM - one of the most handsome gamers in the scene - scored the holy grail of Simon and Richter wins when he toppled the paragon of consistency and patience in Dabuz at Ultimate Summit 5. Through a barrage of projectiles and ledge traps that made both the Min Min and Rosalina's head spin, he pushed the King of NY out of gauntlet phase and forced him to start championship Sunday from losers. Riddles' win (also on Dabuz) at SSC '19 could've had an argument but despite being in open bracket, it being BO3 disqualifies the set from contention.
Honorable Mention: T3 DOM vs. Jakal, Double Down 2022 - Top 64 - T3 DOM sends Jakal packing at Double Down, who would get eliminated by BassMage shortly thereafter.
Honorable Mention: Noxumbra vs. eMass, Ultimate WANTED #3 - Losers Quarters - Noxumbra popped off at WANTED #3, flying with RIchter's projectiles all the way to 4th, eliminating eMass who was on a great run of his own.
Honorable Mention: Riddles vs. Dabuz, Super Smash Con 2019 - Riddles' first (of many) breakout performances was here at Smash Con. Poor Dabuz getting upset by Belmonts years apart.

Chrom CHROM - Leon vs. Riddles, Genesis 9 - Top 48

At Genesis 9 we got the reverse of the Awakening script. Instead of Lucina saving her father, it was the other way around. After getting two stocked by Riddles' Kazuya, French Leon switched in Chrom (Mr. R was whispering sweet nothings in his ear, I'm sure) and proceeded to trade blow-for-blow against Mr. Mishima. During game two, he was down nearly 100% on the final stock but stole it with a beautiful chase into back air. Riddles immediately zero-to-deaths him to start game three and Leon does the exact same thing right back. Every Kazuya combo was responded with a crushing Fsmash read in kind, which of course is how the set ended in Leon's favor 3-1. First Marth, then Chrom. Now Proto's Lucina has to defeat Riddles to complete the trifecta.
Honorable Mention: Mr. R vs. quiK, Albion 4 - Top 12 - Mr. R - AKA the man most addicted to Chrom in the world. stacked up wins en route to 5th at Albion 4 for the first top 8 of his career.
Honorable Mention: Lancelot vs. TriM, Genesis 8 - Top 64 - Two Europeans traveled to compete in G8 only to have to fight each other in losers top 64.
Honorable Mention: Rivers vs. VoiD, Frostbite 2019 - Top 16 - The original pioneer of Chrom, Rivers (then Shoyo James) sent VoiD out of the tournament at Frostbite 2019 two weeks after his 2nd at Genesis 6.

KingKRool KING K. ROOL - KirbyKid vs. Lima, MomoCon 2022 - Top 48

Contrary to his name, KirbyKid is in fact a K. Rool main. I suppose KRoolKid doesn't quite roll off the tongue the same way. But to not even have Kirby as a secondary? C'mon man. In any case, his best win came from his best run at MomoCon where he squared off against Lima. After a 3-1, he sent the Bayonetta main home at 33rd place. Earlier that month, Lima beat KirbyKid at the exact same point in bracket so getting that revenge at MomoCon must have felt sweet. While his CEO 2021 run got further, it didn't come with a Lima win - not to mention KirbyKid was still in BO3 territory when he got eliminated. The future King K. Rool is in KirbyKid's hands. Or a surprise appearance out of Huto.
Honorable Mention: KirbyKid vs. ChocoTaco, CEO 2021 - Top 96 - In the only entry with video, it's a battle of obscure characters with the king coming up on top.
Honorable Mention: KirbyKid vs. SHADIC, CEO 2021 - Pools - This was the site of KirbyKid's peak placing at a major, getting eliminated at 17th by Myran.
Honorable Mention: KirbyKid vs. NWA Danbi, Rise 'N Grind - Top 48 - The last major he attended, KirbyKid got 25th at RNG though I could not tell you who his opponents were.

Isabelle ISABELLE - Jaka vs. AndresFN, Vienna Challengers Arena 2021 - Top 16

Isabelle is more of an echo fighter than actual echo characters like Daisy and Richter and honestly I'm just telling you this because there's no VOD for this selection and thus I will run out of things to say. That and it pisses me off because Nintenod butchered echoes as a concept. Jaka is the yang to kept's yin, playing Isabelle rather than Villager (though kept does dabble in some Isabelle shenanigans on the side). They've both even made top 8 at a major before. As you can guess, Jaka's breakthrough happened at VCA where he stepped into the ring against Andres and Terry. Somehow someway the cute secretary doggo held her own against Go! and launched Jaka into another round of losers. Given his overall low attendance, we might see Jaka surprise us all in the future at another EU major.
Honorable Mention: Jaka vs. NaetorU, Vienna Challengers Arena 2021 - Top 12 - Somehow, someway, Jaka and kept have taken both Isabelle and Villager into top 8 at a major. Animal Crossing is alive and well.
Honorable Mention: Jaka vs. Gin, Ultimate WANTED #4 - Top 48 - Insert match #2 of Jaka vs. a random European at a European major because I don't know better.
Honorable Mention: Jaka vs. Momon, COLOSSEL 2022 - Pools - Insert match #3 of Jaka vs. a random European at a European major because I still don't know better.

Ken KEN - Jahzz0 vs. Shuton, Kagaribi#9 - Top 24

It's always good to set a career best placement at a major. To do so at your first Japanese event is impressive. Beating Shuton at said event is crazy. 3-0'ing Shuton to knock him out of bracket at 17th is insane. Jahzz0 did all of those things in February and I'm still in shock to be honest. This is Shuton, who has never lost a set to Japan's best Ken takera (literally beat him two rounds before fighting Jahzz0). This is Shuton, a top 10 player in the world. This is Shuton, who had not missed top 8 at a Japanese major in one and a half years. And the American made him look foolish in three games straight. That's the type of win that can change your trajectory as a player. Time will tell if that is the case with Jahzz0 and his goofy ahh Donald Duck impression.
Honorable Mention: Vendetta vs. Light, Glitch: Infinite - Top 16 - With a variety of Ken players to choose from, we'll swing by Vendetta's nailbiter set against Light.
Honorable Mention: Jahzz0 vs. Glutonny, Summit 5 - Pools - Jahzz0's first Summit was full of memorable moments, but probably none more memorable than a win on Europe's best player.
Honorable Mention: takera vs. Shogun, EGS Cup 3 - Top 12 - The Ken showcase's final stop is in Japan with takera and his 5th place finish at EGS Cup 3.

Incineroar INCINEROAR - Skyjay vs. Sparg0, Collision 2023 - Losers Finals

NA saw that Japan had characters like Piranha Plant and Dr. Mario making top 3 of their majors and didn't want to feel left out. Last weekend, Skyjay did the unimaginable with a Summit spot on the line, climbed to 2nd place at a supermajor. With a mixture of explosive hits and a healthy serving of cheese, Skyjay maneuvered around the likes of Maister, Sparg0, and Lima. But when it came to losers finals surely he couldn't defeat Sparg0 again, right? Wrong. Killing Sparg0 at an average of 110%, Skyjay feasted on the familiarity of the matchup and against all odds, pushing Incineroar to his absolute limit. VGC Incineroar was taking notes!
Honorable Mention: Skyjay vs. Kola, Super Smash Con 2022 - Top 48 - Prior to his insane Collision run, Skyjay's peak win was his on Kola at the largest event of 2022.
Honorable Mention: Skyjay vs. Chag, RETA 2022 - Losers Quarters - Skyjay notched a pretty 4th place at RETA, sending Chag out during the first top 8 (and top 4) appearance of his career.
Honorable Mention: Skyjay vs. Dabuz, Collision 2023 - Top 64 - This was the win that got me raising eyebrows. Reverse sweeping Dabuz of all players? If only we knew that this was just the start of something truly magical.

PiranhaPlant PIRANHA PLANT - Brood vs. Kameme, Umebura SP4 - Winners Finals

Before there was Sparg0's squad strike Plant, there was Scend's Plant. And before that, there was Brood. In August 2019 you might have had this weird dream where Piranha Plant made grand finals at a major. Then upon waking up you realize that actually happened. Admittedly, there was a lot of BO3 because early Japan tournaments be like that, but Brood still had to get the wins. For winners finals, Brood had to face Kameme fresh off his dub at Umebura Japan Major. Dealing with his Megaman (plus a guest feature from Wario) was a difficult task but the Brood Plant was up for the job. And look, we're not gonna talk about that ending. This is the only Plant top 2, top 4, and top 8 appearance in the history of Ultimate and something we may never see again.
Honorable Mention: Lucky vs. Doorstop, The Big House 10 - Top 32 - The most recent Plant result that's not squad strike Sparg0, Lucky dominated Doorstop at TBH10 in October.
Honorable Mention: Brood vs. Tsubotsubo, Kagaribi#8 - Top 128 - Brood has been unable to replicate the magic of that Umebura run since, but has picked up some good wins here and there.
Honorable Mention: Brood vs. TKM, Kagaribi#6 - Top 64 - At both Kaga#6 and #8, Brood got 33rd, which was his best Plant placing besides USP4 (his 13th at USP2 was with Richter, apparently).

Joker JOKER - MkLeo vs. Tweek, EVO 2019 - Grand Finals

It's August 4th, 2019. EVO 2019 - the largest Ultimate tournament of all time - is headed towards its finale. Tweek is up two games on MkLeo, the best rivalry in Smash. Leo's Joker manages to clinch game three but then instantly goes down two stocks in the pivotal game four. Slowly but surely, Arsene begins to chip away at Tweek's lead. With both players at 120%+ on their final stock, Leo walks up to a shielding Tweek, and waits. Welcome to a moment in history. MkLeo has done some incredible things in this game for the past four years but EVO will remain his magnum opus. The biggest win on his biggest rival on the biggest stage. EVO 2019 grands was really something special. This is not only the greatest Joker win of all time, but it's the greatest Ultimate win of all time.
Honorable Mention: zackray vs. Shuton, Ultimate WANTED #4 - Grand Finals - Another pair of rivals battled on the grandest stage. A ten game gigabanger further hyped by the crowd and commentary.
Honorable Mention: MkLeo vs. Samsora, Super Smash Con 2019 - Grand Finals - A week after EVO, Leo decided to give us an encore. Down 2-1 to Samsora on tournament point, he turned it up and never looked back. Again.
Honorable Mention: MkLeo vs. Light, Genesis 9 - Losers Finals - One of Leo's most recent conquest with the Phantom Thief. Light wanted to fight Joker and he got that and then some.

Hero HERO - Akakikusu vs. zackray, Kagaribi#3 - Losers Semis

Remember when people wanted to ban Hero? Simpler times man, simpler times. Akakikusu is singlehandedly responsible for top level Hero achievements. His breakout run happened to be his first major attended, Kagaribi#3. After being sent to losers by another rising star in Atelier, Aka handled his business up until losers semifinals where he came face to face with zackray, the country's #1 player and ultimate wild card. What followed was one of the most bizarre sets even by Japan's wacky standards, thanks to the combination of zackray and Hero. Aka took a 2-1 lead on the Wario, before zackray brought out ol' reliable in Joker and forced game five. Lots of close calls and wacky interactions ensued and in the end, Hatchet Man of all moves pushed Akakikusu and Hero to top three at a major.
Honorable Mention: Akakikusu vs. Lea, Kagaribi#3 - Top 12 - A win over the best Greninja in the world sent Akakikusu into top 8 during his major debut.
Honorable Mention: Akakikusu vs. tk3, Kagaribi#4 - Top 12 - Riding the momentum of his breakout Kagaribi run, Akakikusu does it again and makes top 8 at Kaga#4.
Honorable Mention: Akakikusu vs. Gackt, Seibugeki #8 - Top 12 - Aka topples Gackt and barely misses out on top 8 thanks to Proto and Shuton. Wonder how many of his countrymen have suffered a similar fate.

Banjo BANJO & KAZOOIE - Toriguri vs. Fuwa, Kagaribi#9 - Top 96

I am so sorry Banjo bros, y'all live a tough life. VODs for your wins were more difficult than some of the puzzle pieces from the source material. The painful reality is that this character was not given the same DLC privilege that the others got (although Wonder Wing kinda nice). Raito is probably the most well-known Banjo player but still shares starting reps with his loyal Duck Hunt, and I was hoping LeoN's surprising pocket Banjo picked up a win somewhere but alas. We are left with another Japanese Banjo in Toriguri, who has a smattering of results ranging from 25th to 65th. It seems unlikely Banjo will make noise soon but with the wild game of Ultimate that we play, who knows what's in store for this dynamic duo.
Honorable Mention: Toriguri vs. Reno, Seibugeki #12 - Top 48 - The highest placing for Toriguri was 25th at Seibugeki #12, and this was their last win before exiting bracket.
Honorable Mention: Toriguri vs. Shirube, MaesumaTOP#9 - Top 128 - Another decent showing out of Toriguri, getting 33rd after entering top 96 on winners side.
Honorable Mention: OwlBBs vs. Baten Caillax, COLOSSEL 2022 - Top 128 - Apparently Europe houses OwlBBs and Wolfen for Banjo mains, but this is the only example I could find at a major.

Terry TERRY - Riddles vs. Sonix, Collision 2023 - Winners Semis

Riddles was getting deja vu down 0-2 to Sonix at Collision 2023. He was 0-3 in the head-to-head, lost CEO 2022 across ten games and then got swept at Let's Make Big Moves to start the new year. But then Mr. Bogard asked the proverbial question: are you okay? And Riddles decided he was. More than okay, in fact. The combo game was on point, his confirms into kill moves were consistent, and Riddles kept sipping that almighty Go! juice throughout his incredible reverse sweep. The most impressive thing about this set is that Riddles' Terry usage (as far as majors go) was limited. Mainstage was really the last time we saw a substantial amount of Terry. So for him to break it out in a do-or-die situation against a top 10 player that has had his number? Sheesh.
Honorable Mention: Riddles vs. Light, Collision 2022 - Top 32 - Another Riddles breakout point was at Collision the year prior, where Mr. Bogard sent Mr. Light into losers.
Honorable Mention: Tsu vs. Eim, Kagaribi#3 - Top 12 - A man known for his pockets, Tsu's Terry totally trounces Eim's Sheik at Kaga#3.
Honorable Mention: Riddles vs. Tweek, Let's Make Big Moves - Top 32 - And now back to your regular scheduled Riddles' Terry win.

Byleth BYLETH - MkLeo vs. acola, Ludwig Smash Invitational - Grand Finals

Saving the Leo entries for last was a good call on my part because it's simply so easy to write about Leo. He took a character like Byleth that many projected as mid tier and won about as many majors with him as the Joker did. At Ludwig's he steamrolled through the competition and had only acola to challenge in grands. The long-anticipated matchup was Leo's first test against Steve since he got unceremoniously 3-0'd by Onin at Smash Con, and he passed the re-exam with flying colors. People waited to see Leo vs. acola, and in the end across six games it wasn't even close but that shouldn't be too surprising considering he's the GOAT. The most surprising thing about Leo's Byleth isn't that it's elite, it's that he rocks the default male skin.
Honorable Mention: MkLeo vs. Sparg0, Mainstage 2021 - Grand Finals - After three tries, Sparg0 finally gets a set win on Leo and it looks like his crowning moment is here in game nine. What happens next may shock you...
Honorable Mention: MkLeo vs. Glutonny, Genesis 8 - Grand Finals - Senor Genesis would not succumb to the French dimension as Leo swiftly claims his 3rd Genesis title.
Honorable Mention: MkLeo vs. Tweek, Riptide 2021 - Grand Finals - When it seemed like Leo had no answers for the Tweek Diddy, he double eliminated the monkey at Riptide.

MinMin MIN MIN - ProtoBanham vs. zackray, Kagaribi#4 - Grand Finals

There exists a timeline where Min Min never gets added to the game and ProtoBanham emerges out of the quarantine period an Inkling main. As the world's #1 Cantonese Silver 2 Valorant Proto fan, I much prefer this reality. Proto's 2021 got off to the perfect start at Kagaribi#4 and was a harbinger of things to come as he would collect three total major wins by year's end. In grands he had to face an old friend in zackray, who he dispatched earlier in winners with Lucina. But after Lucina dropped two games to zackray's Joker, Min Min subbed in and got to work in the reset. zackray tried the ROB in true finals but it was not enough, and the first FP2 character was the first of the bunch to win a major.
Honorable Mention: ProtoBanham vs. MkLeo, Double Down 2022 - Grand Finals - Yes, it's a supermajor win. Yes, it's against Leo. Yes, it's against his ROB...
Honorable Mention: Dabuz vs. MkLeo, Low Tide City - Winners Finals - The popoff should really tell you all you need to know about Dabuz and his history with Leo.
Honorable Mention: ProtoBanham vs. Sparg0, Summit 5 - Winners Quarters - This set vs. Sparg0 showed how Proto can overwhelm you completely with Min Min either for a whole game (G1) or off a single mistake (G5).

Steve STEVE - acola vs. Shuton, MaesumaTOP#7 - Grand Finals

Unlike their status as the best character in the game, Steve's best win was a tough debate. On one hand, acola's Gimvitational win vs. Light was his NA debut against a top five player. On the other hand, his Shuton win at MaesumaTOP#7 was his first major ever, against a top ten player. Oh and he had to win two sets to take the bracket. But this is now an acola statistics post. In his full year of attending offline events, acola has become the winningest player in Japan with eight majors to his name. That also puts him at #3 in wins all-time. Let me repeat: this kid has the 3rd most major wins of all-time already. acola has a higher chance of making grand finals than a plethora of top players have of making top 8. And speaking of top 8, he is only outdone by the GOAT himself in top8%. What will happen in the next year of competition?
Honorable Mention: acola vs. Light, Gimvitational - Grand Finals - Famous last words from Light (paraphrased): "I'm gonna win because I'm the better player." He did not in fact win. acola claims his first trophy on American soil.
Honorable Mention: Onin vs. MkLeo, Super Smash Con 2022 - Top 32 - In a super anticipated matchup, Onin completely rolls over Leo (with minecart, probably) in a 3-0 upset stunner.
Honorable Mention: acola vs. Sparg0, Ludwig Smash Invitational - Losers Semis - In a clash of young prodigies, it was acola who took first blood in the rivalry.

Sephiroth SEPHIROTH - KEN vs. Tea, Battle of BC 4 - Grand Finals

Just imagine One Winged Angel playing as you read this. BoBC 4 was an important event for KEN. He was coming off the heels of disappointing placements at Pound 2022 and Kagaribi#7 (though did sandwich in a top 8 appearance at MaesumaTOP#7). Sonic sped through the bracket, the decision to use Sephiroth for the entirety of top 8 was at least a little surprising. With two other Japanese invaders in Shuton and Tea standing between KEN and his first Ultimate major, it turned out the be the right call. With bountiful use of KEN's favorite Seph move (backwards aerial) and even vanquishing the Tea Kazuya on Final Destination, KEN was finally able to lift an Ultimate trophy. In 2007 there was SephirothKen. 15 years later there was KEN Sephiroth. Time really is a flat circle.
Honorable Mention: Tweek vs. Light, Scuffed World Tour - Winners Quarters - Tweek had struggled to get a win on Light at Summit and Big House with Diddy, but the one winged Angel tagged in at Scuffed and got the job done.
Honorable Mention: KEN vs. Yoshidora, Umebura SP9 - Top 24 - KEN continues to juggle Sephiroth back home. This time Yoshidora gets a taste of the Masamune.
Honorable Mention: Sriks vs. Miya, Kagaribi#9 - Pools - Any of y'all ever show up to your first Japanese supermajor and beat one of their best players? No, just Sriks?

Pythra PYRA & MYTHRA - Shuton vs. acola, Scuffed World Tour - Losers Semis

Ever since they burst onto the scene, Pyra and Mythra have been furiously talked about and utlized. Sparg0, MkLeo, the list goes on and on. Shuton has really taken a liking to Aegis and outside of Cosmos probably has the highest usage of the two blades. At Scuffed, he used both Aegis and Olimar in a balanced spread, but stuck with the girls against acola's deadly Steve. Down 2-0, you could see the gears start to turn and for the next three games Shuton cooked the young prodigy. Three stocking him game three, constantly dodging anvil and juggling the hell out of Steve, knocking him out of minecart. Getting a reverse sweep after having lost earlier in winner's side (plus that devastating SD in game five) must have felt cathartic. This is the power of the Aegis.
Honorable Mention: Cosmos vs. Zomba, Glitch: Infinite: Grand Finals - Fittingly, the player that has long since stuck with Aegis was the first to bring her to the promised land.
Honorable Mention: MkLeo vs. Maister, COLOSSEL 2022 - Grand Finals - Do not watch this set with young children, the results could be psychologically scarring.
Honorable Mention: Sparg0 vs. zackray, Summit 3 - Winners Semis - Can't forget Sparg0 on an Aegis list, who just flat out rinsed zackray when they met at Summit 3.

Kazuya KAZUYA - Riddles vs. Light, The Big House 10 - Grand Finals

Kazuya mains literally only want one thing and it's disgusting. Electric Wind God Fist was the menu item of choice at The Big House 10, going up against Light whose 2022 campaign was the stuff of legends. With Fox and Kazuya at the helm, stocks would fly off the tables left and right, quickly and efficiently. Just go and watch the set again, no words of mine would ever be able to do it justice on paper. It is also unfathomably based that both Riddles and aMSa got their first-ever major wins at the same event. Riddles has since taken Kazuya back to the top of the mountain at Collision '23, but this Big House win was beyond big. He did not sugarcoat it.
Honorable Mention: Riddles vs. MkLeo, Summit 5 - Pools - We've come a long way from when Riddles used Ken to battle Leo's Joker at Super Smash Con 2019, that is for sure.
Honorable Mention: Riddles vs. Sparg0, Gimvitational - Winners Quarters - Championship Sunday at the Gimvitational was a great time for Riddles to pickup his first win on Sparg0.
Honorable Mention: Tea vs. Riddles, Ultimate WANTED #4 - Losers Semis - You didn't think I'd miss out on the fabled KAZUYA MISHIMA ditto, did you?

Sora SORA - zackray vs. Shuton, Kagaribi#5 - Grand Finals

Facts don't care about your feelings, and frankly I don't care about them either. And the facts are that twelve days after Sora's release, zackray pulled up to Kagaribi#5 locked on Sora and won the entire bracket without dropping a single set. That is truly gigachad behavior. Since then Kameme has done incredible things with this character and is the true hero of Sora but for one weekend in October 2021 zackray was just that guy. Hell, maybe it was zackray's performance that inspired Kameme to work hard with this new character. Also, poor Shuton. Denied yet another major victory by zackray but this time via Mickey Mouse shenanigans, that's gotta sting.
Honorable Mention: Kameme vs. zackray, Umebura SP9 - Top 24 - Well well well, how the turn tables. The student (?) beats the master (???) with Kameme sending zackray to losers at Japan's first major of 2023.
Honorable Mention: Kameme vs. Asimo, MaesumaTOP#8 - Top 12 - Who would win? A super buff world warrior or one smol boi with a key?
Honorable Mention: Kameme vs. acola, Seibugeki #12 - Top 12 - We didn't get to see at Umebura SP9, but a month prior Kameme did contribute to the only non-top 8 of acola's career at Seibugeki #12, albeit in a BO3. Still, a win on Japan's best is a win.
And that's a wrap! I hope you enjoyed going through this charcuterie board of incredible plays, amazing wins, and bountiful history. All the entries will be consolidated into a single spreadsheet to be posted at a later date (along with some other nerdy stuff I've been working on on the side) so if you're interested in that stay tuned. Maybe we'll revisit this in another year or two and see how things stand.
Let's have an incredible Summit 6. Stay pogged, everyone.

Riot Platform, formerly known as Riot Blockchain, is a publicly traded cryptocurrency mining and blockchain technology company specializing in Bitcoin infrastructure. In addition, the company offers data center hosting of cryptocurrency mining equipment for institutional clients through its wholly owned subsidiary, Whinstone US, Inc. Riot Platform operates one of the most significant Bitcoin mining operations in North America. Riot platform currently deploys a hash rate capacity of 4.6 EH/s using approximately 136 megawatts (MW) of energy.
​

Expansion of operations

The company is expanding and upgrading its mining operations by developing industrial-scale infrastructure and gaining the latest-generation miners. Riot Platform operates a 750 MW facility in Rockdale, Texas, North America’s most significant Bitcoin mining and hosting facility. The company also plans to expand its capacity by another 400 MW in Corsicana, Texas, which could use enough power to light up over 200,000 homes..

Riot’s mining infrastructure and equipment

Riot has been ballooning its mining infrastructure and equipment in recent years, reinforcing its position as one of the leading cryptocurrency miners. By 2023, Riot expects its total self-mining hash rate to reach an astonishing 12.6 EH/s, with a fleet of approximately 116,150 state-of-the-art S19 series miners. This massive deployment will require around 370 MW of energy to power it. The company is also harnessing the latest immersion-cooling technology, which could increase productivity gains. Riot provides 200 MW of additional capacity for institutional Bitcoin mining clients. Seeing how these ambitious plans play out for Riot in the coming months will be exciting!

Whinstone subsidiary

Whinstone US, Inc., a wholly owned subsidiary of Riot Platform, offers data center hosting services for institutional clients. Whinstone’s state-of-the-art facility is in Rockdale, Texas, and provides high-performance mining capabilities to its clients. The company can host over 10,000 miners. The Whinstone facility is undertaking an ambitious expansion project that seeks to double the current Bitcoin mining capacity of the site nearly. Among the goals of the project are new buildings and a total build-up area of 240,000 sq ft., adding 400 MW of power to the 750 MW goal.
They scheduled all components associated with the expansion in parallel with miner shipments. With these upgrades standardized and applied, the Whinstone facility will be globally recognized as the top name in Bitcoin mining, leading to maximum developed capacity.

Corsicana

Riot Platform will make a massive move in the Bitcoin mining sector with their plans for a large-scale, 1-gigawatt development in Navarro County, Texas. The one-year project has begun with the construction of an initial 400 megawatts of capacity on a 265-acre site. Its immersion-cooled mining and hosting operations will start being operated by July 2023.
The Expansion includes land acquisition and preparation and related ancillary buildings needed for its completion. An estimated investment of $333 million will be put forth until the first quarter of 2024 to fund the Expansion phases.

Riot 2022 financial and operational highlights

• Riot made a total revenue of $259.2 million compared to $213.2 million in 2021, driven by higher Bitcoin production and a full year of Data Center Hosting and engineering revenues.
• They earned $27.3 million in power credits through the support of the ERCOT grid in Texas. The amount of power credits earned equated to 1,815 Bitcoin.
• They produced 5,554 Bitcoin, compared to 3,812 in 2021, a 46% increase.
• Their Bitcoin mining revenue rose to $156.9 million, compared to $184.4 million in 2021. Lower values of Bitcoin drove the decrease in Bitcoin Mining revenue in 2022.
• Their data center hosting revenue rose to $36.9 million, compared to $24.5 million in 2021, primarily because of Whinstone’s acquisition in May 2021.
• Engineering revenue of $65.3 million was obtained primarily because of the acquisition of ESS Metron in December 2021.
• Reported a net loss of $509.6 million, significantly affected by non-cash impairment charges totaling $538.6 million, including goodwill impairment of $335.6 million associated with the Whinstone and ESS Metron acquisitions in 2021.
• They maintained $321.8 million in working capital, including $230.3 million in cash, no long-term debt, and 6,974 Bitcoin produced by the Company’s self-mining operations.
• Ended the hosting agreement at Coin Mint LLC’s Massena, NY facility and moved all miners to the Rockdale Facility, improving Riot’s mining revenue margin through reduced power costs and eliminating third-party hosting fees.
• Riot’s cost to mine Bitcoin for 2022 averaged $11,225 per Bitcoin versus $11,939 in 2021, a decrease of 6% year-over-year.
• Increased hash rate capacity by 213% to 9.7 EH/s as of December 31, 2022, compared to 3.1 EH/s as of December 31, 2021.

Conclusion

Riot Platform has rapidly grown to become one of the largest Bitcoin mining companies in the United States. The company’s goal is to support the Bitcoin blockchain through industrial-scale infrastructure development, and it has made substantial investments in large-scale mining operations across the country. The 1-gigawatt CORSICANA expansion in Texas will be the largest of these projects, providing 400 MW of capacity in its first phase and an additional 600MW in the future. Riot already earned financial and operational highlights in 2022 with total revenue reaching $259.2 million, Bitcoin Mining revenue of $156.9 million, Data Center Hosting revenue of $36.9 million, Engineering revenue of $65.3 million, and a total hash rate capacity of 9.7 EH/s. As Riot strives for industry leadership in Bitcoin mining, investors and stakeholders should closely monitor its progress.

Are you a business executive or an international jet setter? Whatever the case, you are likely to spend more time traveling than you would like. Even under the best circumstances, traveling either for work or pleasure can be a stressful endeavor.
Having a first-class airline ticket and a luxurious hotel room waiting for you at the end of your long journey to Dublin, doesn’t mean you won’t experience jet lag or flight delays. Busy schedules and unfamiliar surroundings all add to stress that you could do without, leading to disrupted eating and sleeping schedules and much more.
Airport chauffeurs as part of the software technology they use will monitor your flight and adjust the pickup time accordingly. Whether your flight is delayed or even early, your chauffeur will have arrived in a timely manner so they are there waiting for you when your flight touches down.
Source - https://lflcs.wordpress.com/2022/11/28/consider-professional-chauffeur-car-service-to-dublin-airport/

Firstly, I want to say:
Generally, I find my life in Downstate IL to be satisfactory. My house was affordable, my bills aren’t that bad. My job is okay. The people are mostly fine.
I’m a New Englander. My family has been entrenched in that region for 400 years. So culturally, I have a lot of habits that have engendered some initial feelings of resentment from folks with whom I interact. However, after getting used to my direct style of communication and intolerance for b.s. I’ve managed to make a few friends that I will probably have for a lifetime.
Things I’ve had to adjust to:
People tend to be more outgoing than I prefer.
A gentleman bought a house across the street from me and came over to introduce himself. I felt accosted. How dare he invade the sanctity of my curtilage to subject me to listening to unsolicited information about himself and to proceed to interrogate me about my personal life.
Sir, I do not think it’s appropriate for you to ask me my name and what day my trash gets picked up!
People don’t just get to the point.
My wife (Illinoisian) walked into the kitchen and bemoaned, “I can’t reach the cup I want. It’s too high up.” To which I replied from the living room, “That sounds like quite a predicament. I wish you luck in your endeavor.”
APPARENTLY, I was supposed to read her mind and get up and get it for her WITHOUT her just asking for help. What… The… Hell? And that’s just one example of the communication style I encounter frequently here.
Being straight with people is rude?
I was invited to go out with some work acquaintances. I declined because I preferred staying home to read my wife’s mind and what I was invited to do, “…sounds like something that I would not enjoy. No, thank you.”
I guess I was supposed to lie and say I have a kidney infection or something. I don’t know. But it was “not very polite.” Is the alternative go and be miserable?
Driving distances are absurd.
Why is everything so far? Why do the roads not just go town to town? Why is everything a rectangle? Why are there so many god damned roads? Why is this road paved when the only person who uses the road is a farmer? Where are the trees? Why do I still see my dog after 3 days running?
Income tax.
Wtf, with the flat income tax?
Lack of municipal/county/state utilities/services.
This is probably my biggest peeve. I pay $40/mo for trash pickup. Recycling costs money. No public compost. When I talk to people about it, they look at me like I’m crazy.
Where I’m from trash is by the bag. Make less trash = pay less money. Recycling is done at no cost. And compost is collected for a small monthly fee (like $5). After sorting out the recycling and compost one MIGHT put a trash bag out every two weeks. And it’s all managed by a municipal monopoly that comes ONCE PER WEEK. A large truck for the trash. A medium truck for the recycling. A small truck for the compost that leaves a fresh bin.
Right now on my street there are big trash trucks pounding on the road five days. That’s a lot of wear and tear.
Also, if one is part of the compost program, they can go get compost for their gardens. AND they can buy locally grown vegetables (grown with the compost in public gardens) extremely cheap.
Why is this not a thing in the place where almost anything can grow?
That’s all I can process right now. It’s stressing me out. But I have plenty more to say if anyone is (or honestly isn’t) interested. I need to get this all off my chest.
Thanks for reading.
Edited to address an odd phenomenon:
One sentence of this post appears to have struck a nerve. I am not saying there are no trees. I’m just accustomed to a place that is about 90% trees. That’s all. That I mentioned it at all was for comedic purposes. I mean, it’s the “Prairie State.” I knew that before I moved here. With the exception of the Shawnee and the Driftless area, I was aware in advance of the excruciating flatness and lack of trees. I apologize if I have offended anyone. As penance, I will eat an Italian Beef and plant some corn.

I met with my doctor yesterday for my first check-in since starting Ozempic (not T2D, but covered without PA under my policy), and thought it was a good time to do a recap of my experiences for anyone who is curious or on the fence about these medications. I'm also going to (reluctantly) share my starting stats. Never thought I'd be sharing this info with strangers on the internet, but I'm going to do it!
Starting Weight: 258 lbs, Height: 5'3 Female, newly 35 years old, 4 doses of .25 and two doses of .5 so far. BMI was in the mid-40's.
The Good:
-I've had VERY mild side effects. I was so worried about major side effects that my PCP prescribed Zofran at the same time she sent in the Ozempic prescription. I've only needed to take it once. I have had some mild nausea, but it's been easily controlled with anti-nausea pressure point bands. I 100% recommend trying these. They don't work for everyone, but they are inexpensive and are SO worth trying for anyone struggling with nausea. I've also used some ginger drops from time to time that have helped a lot.
-Hello feeling normal! I finally know what it feels like to have a normal appetite and actually feel full! I'm eating much smaller portions, I'm easily satisfied and all cravings are virtually gone. The lack of food noise feels so freeing! I used to obsess about food all the time. What I was going to eat, how I shouldn't eat it because it was bad for me, the guilt I felt when I ate it anyway, and usually way more than I should... it's gone. It's so easy to eat fresh, nutrient dense food and it's delicious! It's what I want to eat!
-Total reversal of HS (Hidradenitis Suppurativa). I was diagnosed finally after several years of testing in September 2022. At the time, I was a stage 2 to 3. Several months of oral and topical antibiotics, special washes and creams, and it seemed like I was going to be happy with being a Stage 1 or 2. Since starting Ozempic, I have no new lesions. Anywhere. They're all healed up. I haven't been on medication since January, and guess what. It's gone. I see my dermatologist in a few weeks, and I have been in communication with him. He's seen this happen with two other patients, and he's fully prepared to consider me in "remission" after that appointment. I'm thrilled. It's painful, it's embarrassing, it made me feel dirty. And it's gone. What a feeling!
-Better sleep, better concentration, SO much more energy: Have I mentioned that I feel good? Because I feel GOOD!! I just spent a week down south training our hunt test/field trial lab. Major exercise, major walking, tons of steps and it didn't phase me at all. I actually want to exercise and do physical activity.
-Super easy jump from .25 to .50. In fact, I have less side effects on .50 than I did on .25. My body is definitely adjusting well with the titration schedule. With that being said, it was time for me to jump to .50. My body was giving me signals that it was ready, and I was. It was seamless.
-In six weeks, I've lost 16 pounds. I'm putting this at the end of the good list, because while I'm totally thrilled, I'm also completely shocked and it's secondary to all of the other amazing things. I know it can and probably will slow down. I've also been following WW fairly consistently since 2020, and part of me keeps thinking this will be like every other time I've lost weight, and it will just come back, no matter what I do. So it's at the end of the list, as a secondary benefit. I love that I feel that way!
The Bad:
-I have had some constipation. Nothing major, nothing I couldn't work through, but it was definitely harder than normal and required a lot more effort. Again, can't believe I'm sharing this with people on the internet, but here we are lol. No medication required, just more effort and ensuring that I'm getting enough fiber in my diet.
-I have had some acid reflux issues, which I have had my entire life. A prescription of famotidine from my PCP has taken care of most of these issues. I definitely need to stay upright for a bit after I eat anything, but I haven't been miserable.
-My sense of smell is INTENSE. Whew. I smell EVERYTHING, and about 75% of it makes me gag. My husband only half-jokingly asked me if I was pregnant. I am 1,000% not pregnant, but man. My sniffer is on overload.
And now...The Ugly:
-I had an awful and humiliating experience with the pharmacy who filled the prescription for my first pen. They're my usual pharmacy and they had it in stock, which was amazing, so I had the prescription sent there. I went to pick it up filled with hope and armed with an Ozempic savings card. When I presented it to the pharmacy tech, she said she'd have to talk to the pharmacist about it. The pharmacist then proceeded to yell from the back, while many other people were around that "Yeah, this isn't going to work because I filled this for obesity, not Type II Diabetes. Novo only honors this card if your prescription is sent over with the code for Type II Diabetes. We're too busy to re-enter all of your info only for me to tell you this isn't going to work." When I questioned her and let her know that Novo assured me it would work no matter what, she again, in front of many people, said "I reluctantly filled this prescription for you in the first place. There's a shortage, and I'm not wild about giving it to someone who isn't a Type II Diabetic but I did it. Let's not push it." I was so embarrassed that I paid the $150 and left as quickly as I could. I had my prescription sent to another pharmacy, and it was a much better experience. They also had it in stock, I gave them the savings card info over the phone, and guess what? IT WORKED. Like I knew it would, because Novo confirmed that it would. That brings my out of pocket cost to $25. So suck it previous pharmacy, I'll never use you again and I called your corporate representative to file a complaint.
And to finally wrap up this novel of a post...What I've Learned:
-For me, nausea comes with being hungry or my stomach being empty. I've found that eating the traditional three meals a day doesn't work for me. I eat 5-6 small meals each day and I've found that I very rarely get nauseous and never feel overly full and miserable, I just feel satisfied. It's kind of a pain, but it's worth the pain to feel good.
-Hydrate, hydrate, hydrate! I feel MUCH better fully hydrated, and I also feel much better if I use one Liquid IV packet each day. If I don't use one, I can tell. I just don't feel as great as when I do.
-Protein is your friend! I've been loving Premier Protein shakes. I'll drink one of them for one of my small meals almost every day. I usually have two shakes a day, and it helps me get to my protein goal, which makes me feel better, helps with potential hair loss, and keeps my energy up for sure. The Cafe Latte shake is my absolute favorite in the morning. I am also a big fan of freezing a Caramel shake until it's slushy and eating it with a spoon. It feels like such a treat!
-Communication is key. My husband and I had some disagreements in the first couple weeks because I didn't feel like he was supportive. Picture me dramatically holding the box of Ozempic over the trash can saying I might as well just throw it out, because he was so unsupportive. That man is a saint, because he calmly told me that I never told him what I needed. I stopped for a second and realized he was 100% right. I hadn't. I expected him to read my mind, and that wasn't going to work. Once I told him what I needed, I realized how supportive and excited for me he is. I told him maybe he'll finally get his smoke show trophy wife! ;) He said he already had her, then slapped my butt (as per usual) as soon as I bent over to pick something up. Did I mention the man is a saint??
Whew. That's it for now. If you're still with me after all of that, you're also a saint! I hope this is helpful for someone! Sending virtual hugs to all of you!

Case details: https://floodlit.org/a/a586/
As of March 22, 2023, the accused (an active Mormon) is involved in two separate first degree felony child molestation cases in King County, Washington:

2022 sexual abuse case

• King County Superior Court case #221075402 (22-1-07540-2)
• Victim was a 7-year-old boy.
• November 24, 2022 (Thanksgiving Day): The accused allegedly molested the boy while they celebrated Thanksgiving at the boy's home.
• December 8, 2022: Arrested by the King County Sheriff’s Office.
• December 8, 2022: Charged with first degree felony child molestation.
• December 9, 2022: Pleaded not guilty and released on $100,000 bail.
• March 22, 2023: Currently scheduled for a pretrial hearing in April 2023.

2023 sexual abuse case

• King County Superior Court case #231006522 (23-1-00652-2)
• Victim was a boy under 10 years old.
• 2020: The accused allegedly molested the boy at the Redmond LDS stake center during Sunday church meetings.
• Court documents say that multiple witnesses saw what happened during those church services and that the boy told his parents the accused had molested him more than once.
• March 15, 2023: Arrested by Redmond police.
• March 15, 2023: Bail is set at $200,000.
• March 22, 2023: The accused remains at the King County Correctional Facility. He is set to be arraigned within a few days.

The accused is currently listed in the Hartman Park LDS ward directory (Redmond Washington stake) as having a calling, and has been regularly attending church for many years.
URGENT: There may be more victims. If you have any information, you can call the Redmond police tip line at 425-556-2500.
Thank you for helping us shine a light on Mormon sexual abuse cases.
edit: Corrected the name of the LDS building where abuse allegedly occurred in 2020. And oops, removed the FB link.

Hub post
Contributors: chainer9999, TheReaver88
Division: AFC North
Record: 12-4 (1 no contest), AFC North Champions, Lost in AFC Title Game
Season Summary:
After a Cinderella run the previous season which ended just short of a truly miraculous ending, there were a lot of split opinions about whether the Bengals were “for real.” While there were people who believed that a young nucleus led by Joe Burrow, Ja’Marr Chase and numerous talented but relatively unknown defenders would continue to grow and be even better in 2022-23, the majority opinion was that the Bengals were prime regression candidates and that they were not even the favorites for their own division.
The early part of the season appeared to validate the skeptics: the Bengals sputtered to an 0-2 start, and the offseason O-line improvements were not yet apparent. But Joe Burrow found his form, the line came together as a cohesive unit, and the offense adjusted to take what the defenses were giving them in the short passing game. After a humiliating Monday night loss in Cleveland, the team buckled down and ripped off 8 straight wins (with a tragic no contest in the middle) to roar past the Ravens and grab the division title for the second straight year. The Bengals entered the postseason with some serious question marks; two of their three prized OL signings went down with injuries, as did left tackle Jonah Williams. After squeezing by Baltimore and dominating Buffalo, Cincinnati fell just short against the Chiefs in the AFC Title Game by a familiar score of 23-20. The Bengals experienced several departures in free agency, but the coaching staff and quarterback will remain with the team in 2023 in search of the franchise’s first Super Bowl.
1. 2022 Offseason Recap

• Free Agency Signings:
  • RG Alex Cappa (4 years, $35m, $11m guaranteed): Announced within the first minute of free agency, Cappa's signing signaled a stark departure from the past, when the Bengals refused to pay big money to guards. As the interior of the o-line was absolute garbage especially near the end of the previous season, Cappa was viewed with great optimism.
  • C Ted Karras (3 years, $18m, $5m guaranteed): Karras a bit less so. While known as a heady and smart player, the Bengals fanbase had been focused in on Ryan Jensen, but he chose to play with TB12 for one more run. Karras felt like a consolation prize at the time, but he was definitely a good signing and won over many fans with his play and attitude.
  • RT La’El Collins (3 years, $21m, $5m guaranteed): Filled with shopping mall intrigue and Burrow-baked cupcakes, the La’El Collins saga eventually ended up with him in the building. While the great majority of the fanbase welcomed a signing of Collins’s pedigree, there was some skepticism amongst certain fans that maybe there was a reason Collins had been let go by Dallas. Yeah, about that……
  • TE Hayden Hurst (1 year, $3.5m): A signing needed to replace the departed CJ Uzomah, expectations were modest for Hurst. With his first-round pedigree, the hope was that he’d slot into Uzomah’s production, maybe make some gamebreaking plays.
• Notable Re-signed players:
  • DT BJ Hill (3 years, $30m total, $13m guaranteed): After a promising campaign rotating with Larry Ogunjobi, the Bengals chose to pay Hill. This was seen as a bit of a gamble as Hill, while productive in a rotational role, had not been the starter the previous season. Ogunjobi was more disruptive as an interior pass rusher, but the deciding factor was probably Ogunjobi’s deficiency in run support and his late-season injury.
  • FS Jessie Bates III (Franchise tag, $12.9m): After failing to come to a long-term deal, Bates was franchised, a distinction that he did not take great joy in. Bates maintained that he would refuse to play on the tag, and carried out that threat well into training camp.
  • CB Eli Apple (1 year, $3.5m): While most knew Apple as 1) a loud Tweeter and 2) the guy that got burned by Cooper Kupp in the final moments of the Super Bowl, Bengals fans knew that Apple had outplayed his paltry contract. With the cornerback market getting pricy, Apple was retained as a cheap value CB2 or CB3, depending on how the draft would fall out.
• Other re-signed players:
  • QB Brandon Allen (1 year, $1.5m), WR Stanley Morgan (2 years, $2.24m), WR Adam Cole Trenton Irwin (1 year, $825k), WR Trent Taylor (1 year, $1.135m), WR Mike Thomas (1 year, $1.13m)
  • DT Josh Tupou (2 years, $3m), S/CB* Tre Flowers (1 year, $1.85m), S Michael D. Thomas (1 year, $1.17m)
  • LS Clark Harris (1 year, $1.27m)
• Departures:
  • TE CJ Uzomah (UFA, Jets, 3 yrs $24m): the spiritual leader of the team during their Cinderella playoff run, Uzomah left for a payday and to be in New York. While it was sad, people understood that his money for his production was not a great deal.
  • DT Larry Ogunjobi (UFA, Steelers, 1 yr): After a failed medical scuttled his potential big-money move to Chicago, there were some rumblings that Ogunjobi could possibly return, but no dice; Ogunjobi eventually ended up in Pittsburgh, leaving Baltimore as the one AFC North team that he hasn’t played for……yet.
  • C Trey Hopkins (Released, unsigned by any NFL team in 2022), OG Quinton Spain (UFA, unsigned by any NFL team in 2022), RT Riley Reiff (UFA, Bears): Three members of the offensive line cut or not retained. Tells you something, doesn't it?
  • CB Trae Waynes (Released, subsequently retired): the big miscue out of the Bengals’ defensive spending spree, Waynes was constantly hurt, and even when healthy could not beat out Awuzie or Apple.
  • CB Darius Phillips (UFA, Raiders): After his two-muff debacle against San Francisco, he was never heard from again in Bengals stripes.
  • CB Vernon Hargraves III (UFA, unsigned by any NFL team), S Ricardo Allen (UFA, subsequently retired), LB Jordan Evans (UFA, unsigned by any NFL team)
  • WR Auden Tate (UFA, Falcons), OL Fred Johnson (ERFA, Buccaneers)
• Draft picks:
  • Round 1: S Daxton Hill (Michigan) - a redshirt year for Dax, as he was picked with Bates’ departure in mind. Still, it was somewhat depressing to see him virtually never get on the field, and he worryingly showed some mental lapses when used on special teams.
  • Round 2: CB Cam Taylor-Britt (Nebraska) - the first instance of Zac Taylor’s Nebraska connection being utilized, CTB was picked to compete with Apple for the CB2 job.
  • Round 3: DL Zach Carter (Florida) - seen by many draftniks as a reach, Anarumo’s penchant for players who can line up in multiple positions was a deciding factor. Ultimately did not contribute much, as his first campaign was spent mostly bulking up.
  • Round 4: OG Cordell Volson (North Dakota State) - the sole pick spent on offense, Volson was seen as a Frank Pollack guy from the start, a “glass-eater” to use Pollack’s term. He beat out Jackson Carman for the left guard job and held it, making the pick a relative success.
  • Round 5: S Tycen Anderson (Tulsa) - an injury wiped out his rookie campaign.
  • Round 6: DL Jeffrey Gunter (Coastal Carolina) - Not much out of Gunter in his rookie campaign, except on special teams.
• Notable UDFAs:
  • LS Cal Adomitis (Pitt): this pickup would prove hugely important after Week 1.
• Midseason waiver pickups
  • DT Jay Tufele (Jacksonville Jaguars)
  • OG Max Scharping (Houston Texans)
  • TE Devin Asiasi (New England Patriots)
• Other notable happenings
  • Zac Taylor’s contract extended: Hey, if you lead the Bengals from the doldrums to the precipice of a Super Bowl, you deserve to get paid. There were concerns about whether this was a knee-jerk extension to an overachieving season, but over the course of 2022, Taylor showed enough both tactically and leadership-wise that we can say it wasn’t a mistake.
  • Joe Burrow’s appendectomy: the quest for an uninterrupted Joe Burrow offseason continues, as he had an appendectomy before training camp and missed all of preseason. While none of the players or coaches admitted as such, one gets the sense that this definitely impacted Burrow early in the season.
  • Paul Brown Stadium becomes Paycor Stadium: Seeing the dollar signs racing towards him in the form of Burrow, Chase, and Higgins, Mike Brown gave in and put up the naming rights of Paul Brown Stadium for sale. Paycor made the highest bid, and thus PBS became Paycor Stadium. I maintain that it sounds better than Acrisure Stadium; your mileage may vary.

2. Team Stats
Offense

	Total	League Rank	2021 League Rank
Points	418	7th	7th
Total Yards	5371	7th 🔺	13th
Yards Per Play	5.9	7th	7th
Passing Yards	4520	6th 🔺	7th
Passing TDs	35	T-2nd 🔺	7th
Interceptions	12	T-19th (w/ 4 other teams)	T-14th
Sacks Allowed	44	T-22nd 🔺	32nd
Sack Yards Allowed	280	21st 🔺	31st
Yards Per Pass Attempt	7.4	9th 🔻	3rd
20+ yard Passes	54	12th 🔻	6th
Rushing Yards	1528	29th 🔻	23rd
Yards Per Rush	3.8	T-30th 🔻	24th
Rushing TDs	14	T-20th (w/ BAL) 🔻	T-14th
20+ yard Runs	7	T-26th (w/ 3 other teams) 🔻	T-22nd
DVOA	14.2%	4th 🔺	18th

From the data, we can conclude a few things.

• Continuing last year’s trend, the Bengals were a top-quartile passing offense, even after a dreadful start to the season. After some fits and starts, the players and coaching staff eventually figured out how to attack opposing defenses that took away the deep shots which made the team must-watch TV last season. This dinged the yards per attempt figure, which dipped from 3rd in 2021 to 9th this season.
• However, the running game, which was bottom quartile last year, was even more putrid–and this was evident to anybody that was watching the games. It got so bad that at one point, the Bengals gave up lining up under center and went all shotgun all the time, because they simply could not run the ball from under center (and telegraphed the run way too much when they went under center). The running backs did contribute significantly in the passing game as Burrow utilized checkdowns extensively as a counter to the 2 high safety shells, but the running game itself ultimately never got going.
• The reinforcements for the O-line did have some impact, as the sacks allowed and sack yardage stat all improved quite a bit from last year (55 → 42, 403 → 280). Some of this was also on Burrow learning when to give up looking for the home run.

Defense

	Total	League Rank	2021 League Rank
Points Allowed	322	5th 🔺	17th
Yards Allowed	6048	8th 🔺	17th
Rushing Yards Allowed	1706	5th	5th
Rushing Yards Allowed Per Carry	4.2	T-7th 🔺	15th
Rushing TDs Allowed	12	T-10th 🔺	15th
Passing Yards Allowed	3665	16th 🔺	26th
Passing Yards Allowed Per Attempt	6.6	18th 🔺	20th
Passing TDs Allowed	17	T-3rd 🔺	15th
Sacks	30	29th 🔻	11th
Takeaways	24	13th 🔺	18th
Red Zone Defense %	52%	T-9th 🔺	18th
DVOA	-4.4%	11th 🔺	19th

A few conclusions:

• Last year’s defense was a middling defense that got hot at the right time; this year, the results were more steady throughout the season, as the Bengals improved their defensive rankings across nearly all areas.
• One notable area where the Bengals declined was in sacks, as Trey Hendrickson’s 14.5 sacks from last year did not materialize (though advanced stats say that he played just as well, if not better). Other than T-Rex, the Bengals don’t really have an elite pass rusher, which in turn puts a strain on coverage.
• While Lou Anarumo being back is a huge boon, there most definitely will be some departures this offseason compared to last year, when virtually every meaningful contributor returned......and this was borne out in free agency, as Bates and Bell walked away, bringing the "dark day" that Anarumo had been dreading.

3. Season Review

• Game by game recaps: see here
• Season highs and lows:
  • Highs
    • Feasting on the NFC South: With the season off to an uneven start, the Bengals won a close one against New Orleans, and then absolutely pasted the Falcons and the Panthers to gain momentum for the stretch run. Even old GOAT Brady could not stop the Bengals, as the Bengals defense led a rousing second half comeback to sweep the NFC South.
    • The 8-game win streak to end the season: There was a lot of skepticism about the Bengals after their slow start, as the stretch run slate of opponents looked exceptionally difficult. However, the team came together for this stretch and dispatched Tennessee, Kansas City, old nemesis Cleveland, Tampa, New England and Baltimore to once again claim the division.
    • The Hubbard Yard Dash: Arguably the greatest defensive play in Bengals history. With the game in the balance on Wild Card Weekend, local kid Sam Hubbard scooped up a goal-line fumble and, unlike in Madden, didn’t run out of stamina on his way to the end zone, snatching a victory from the jaws of defeat. A fitting celebratory moment for a player who often gets overlooked.
    • Returning to the AFC Title Game: There were many questions about whether the Bengals were just a one-year wonder, or if 2021 was the foundation for something greater. While they came up just short in the AFC Title Game, the fact that they managed to make it there twice in a row after being a doormat for half a decade is not something that should be laughed at.
  • Lows
    • The first two games of the season: A comedy of errors in Week 1 (a pick six, a blocked XP, and a hilariously botched FG) and a sputtering offense in Week 2 started the season off in morbid fashion. Ultimately, these two squandered games would become the difference in the Bengals having no shot at home field in the stretch run.
    • The Halloween massacre: The Browns have had Zac Taylor’s number ever since he became head coach, and on Halloween, Jake Brisket Jacoby Brissett, Nick Chubb and Myles Garrett delivered an ass whooping. It was the Bengals’ worst loss of the season, compounded by CB1 Chidobe Awuzie tearing his ACL.
    • The end of the season: No doubt about it, the final game against Kansas City feels like an opportunity missed, as O-line injuries led to the offense sputtering even as the defense put up an incredible effort against Patrick Mahomes & co. The way it ended with a costly penalty also stings, as many knew that this year would be the end of the line for several key players.
  • Special aside
    • The Damar Hamlin game: As the other team participating in that game, I think the Bengals, and specifically head coach Zac Taylor, did the right thing by conferring with Sean McDermott to essentially stop the game, and get the very distressed players off the field. It’s really a relief seeing Hamlin now walking about and able to live his life, considering he was temporarily a dead man on the field in Cincinnati. Even though I don’t think the league handled the aftermath very well, I truly hope that in another scenario like that, the Bengals and Taylor would act just like they did that night–some things are bigger than football.
• Awards:
  • HoF induction: Ken Riley (posthumous)
  • Best Celly of the Year (lol): The Jungle Roller Coaster (Week 18)
  • Pro Bowlers
    • First Team: QB Joe Burrow, WR Ja’Marr Chase, DE Trey Hendrickson
    • Alternates: FS Jessie Bates III (2nd alternate), RB Joe Mixon (3rd alternate), WR Tyler Boyd (3rd alternate), K Evan McPherson (4th alternate), C Ted Karras (5th alternate), DT DJ Reader (5th alternate), SS Vonn Bell (5th alternate)
  • All-Pros: None
    • A bit of a rant, but it is incredible how the Bengals have no All-Pros, just three first team Pro Bowlers, managed to win the AFC North and reel off 8 straight wins to finish the season, and Zac Taylor doesn’t get a single vote for CotY. Where the hell are the victories coming from then?

4. Offense/Defense/Special Teams Review

• Offense in-depth Review: Here
• Defense in-depth Review: Here
• Special Teams in-depth Review: Here

5. What Lies Ahead for the Bengals in the 2023 Offseason (Free Agency and Draft)

• Extension Candidates: before we get started, it should be noted that the Bengals front office has rarely used the "modern cap techniques" such as void years and backlogging guarantees--they like doing flat AAV contracts and not incurring dead money when possible. However, with Burrow and Chase (and others) soon to be paid, it is going to be tricky to navigate the cap without utilizing such methods. This offseason will grant us a real look at what the Bengals' strategy is moving forward.
  • QB Joe Burrow: The big one. He’ll get extended, no question–it’s a matter of how much, and how it’s structured. An AAV of $50m is probably going to be the end result. This extension will be the one that shapes all decisions this offseason, as well as many other offseasons to come.
  • WR Tee Higgins: Extension-eligible, the tricky part is that Chase is available for one next year (although Chase has a 5th year option). Since paying two WRs WR1 money is often not seen as a wise investment of cap space, there is a lot of speculation that Higgins might be trade bait a la A.J. Brown–of course, we know what happened to the GM that actually did trade A.J. Brown, so really? An extension might not get done, but the Bengals will want to keep him around at least for the next two years, possibly even using the tag on Higgins after this season if things go down that route.
  • LB Logan Wilson: The 3rd rounder in the “Burrow draft,” Wilson has blossomed into a good-to-great linebacker. With Pratt looking set to leave, the team will want to lock down Wilson; the issue will be the cap number. If the Higgins extension is a no-go, Wilson could be the one getting it instead this offseason. The return of Pratt at a relatively modest number might change the calculation a bit.
• The next two are primarily cap-related extension ideas, which, for the record, are not typically things that Cincinnati has done.
  • DE Trey Hendrickson: With two years remaining on his deal and his importance to the defense paramount, an extension might be an option to lower Hendrickson's cap hit ($15m).
  • DT DJ Reader: Entering the last year of his 4-year deal, Reader's importance to the run defense is similar to Hendrickson's to the pass rush. Just like Hendrickson, Reader's cap hit is $15m--an extension could be on the cards.
• Free agency
  • Notable UFAs
    • FS Jessie Bates III: Having already had contentious negotiations for two years and playing on the franchise tag, Bates looks almost as good as gone. Get paid, man. (Highly likely to leave) Left for Atlanta on a 4-year, $64m deal. Glad he got his bag, thanks for the memories Jessie.
    • LB Germaine Pratt: Played himself into a big payday by being a positive in pass coverage, and probably out of Cincinnati’s reach. (Likely to leave) Ended up staying, solidifying the linebacking corps (3 years, $21m).
    • SS Vonn Bell: With Bates almost certain to leave and Lou Anarumo on record as saying that it will be a dark day when both Bell and Bates are no longer here, Bell looks to be a high priority to re-sign. This is especially because unlike Bates, the Bengals don’t have someone that can fill in Bell’s slot. (50-50) Left for Carolina on a 3-year, $22.5m deal. Thanks for the memories Vonn, you turned the franchise around when you sent JuJu into next week.
    • CB Eli Apple: With the emergence of Cam Taylor-Britt and Apple’s antics on Twitter coming to the fore after the Divisional Round, it’s a toss-up to whether Apple is re-signed. If he’s willing to play for cheap like he did last year ($4m), it wouldn’t be a bad idea. (50-50)
    • TE Hayden Hurst: Hurst became a fan favorite in Cincinnati, and he seemed to like it here as it gave him a chance to resurrect his career. The issue will definitely be price, as nobody is certain exactly how much Hurst will command–if it goes into CJ Uzomah territory ($8m AAV), the Bengals will probably bid him goodbye. (50-50) Left for Carolina on a 3-year, $21m deal. The man parlayed the season into a bag, good for him!
    • RB Samaje Perine: Mixon might be gone unless he takes a pay cut, in which case the Bengals will probably want to retain Perine while bringing in a rookie. How much the Bengals pursue Perine will be dependent on money and what happens with Mixon. (Likely to return) Left for Denver on a 2-year, $7.5m deal. He stated personal reasons, so I'll respect that. We'll always remember his TD against the Chiefs and him dribbling Justin Reid's head.
    • RB Trayveon Williams, WR Trent Taylor, OG Max Scharping: re-signed
    • CB Jalen Davis, S Michael D. Thomas: re-signed
    • DB Tre Flowers
    • QB Brandon Allen
    • TE Drew Sample
    • LS Clark Harris
  • Potential cut candidates
    • RB Joe Mixon: His 12m cap hit is a large one for a running back who was ineffective last year. As he doesn't have additional years left on his deal, restructuring is not an option. Straight up cutting Mixon would save roughly $7.2m against the cap, while incurring $5.5m in dead money. Perine's departure makes this less likely.
    • OT La'El Collins: The coaching staff seems to want him back. However, his play noticeably dipped last year, making a cut a distinct possibility. Cutting Collins would save the Bengals $6m while incurring $3.3m in dead money.
  • ERFAs
    • LS Cal Adomitis: re-signed in February, which probably means the end of the road for Clark Harris.
    • LB Clay Johnston
    • TE Mitchell Wilcox
  • RFA
    • LB Joe Bachie: Re-signed
• Additions
  • LT Orlando Brown (4 yrs, $64m): A very unexpected signing, and probably the biggest swing that the Bengals have taken in free agency regarding the offensive line in recent memory. He's not perfect, but he's a damn good LT and in his prime; throw in the surprisingly reasonable contract, and this is a signing that Bengals fandom was highly supportive of. This did in turn force current LT Jonah Williams to make a trade request; stay tuned.
  • S Nick Scott (3 yrs, $12m): Signed to pair up with Dax Hill after Vonn Bell's departure, Scott is definitely athletic and heady, although Bengals fandom was somewhat disappointed after prime free agent Chauncey Gardner-Johnson was all over Twitter re-tweeting Bengals players throughout early free agency.
  • OG/T Cody Ford (1 yr, $1.08m): Signed for the minimum, there are rumblings that Ford could be the Bengals' plan at RT, which does not give me any reassurances. It's better than Adeniji, but that's not saying much.
• Draft
  • Needs
    • Offensive Line: Center and right guard are stable (Karras, Cappa), left tackle is now set (Brown) but right tackle is uncertain (Collins? Williams? Ford?) and left guard is nothing special (Volson). The Bengals will definitely look to see if they can secure a high-potential offensive tackle prospect with their first rounder, with names like Dawand Jones, Broderick Jones, Darnell Wright, and Anton Harrison all in the mix for the 29th pick.
    • Tight End: Hurst is gone, Sample and Wilcox are out of contract, and this is a deep class for tight ends. The idea of taking one in the first round like Michael Mayer or Darnell Washington is hotly debated on Bengals Twitter, but later round potential picks like Sam Laporta, Tucker Kraft or Luke Schoonmaker are also discussed. They need at least one.
    • Pass rusher: While the defense improved this season, it had a precipitous drop-off in sacks. Either a good edge or someone that can provide pressure from the interior is needed, and names like Calijah Kancey, Nolan Smith, and BJ Ojulari are all under discussion.
    • Cornerback: With Awuzie coming off a torn ACL and CTB still developing, the Bengals could see cornerback as a position that needs another injection of youth–you need as many corners as you can in this league, and the Bengals have not been afraid to stack picks at CB in the past (Jonathan Joseph-Leon Hall, Dre Kirkpatrick-Darqueze Dennard). Deonte Banks was the main name that got discussed for the 29th pick, though he may have risen too far now.
    • Wide receiver: Tyler Boyd may be on his last season at Cincy, and with Higgins and Chase due for raises, finding a developing wide receiver is a need. Probably not a 1st unless someone slips far, but they’ll look for options later in the draft.
    • Running back: Even if Mixon returns, it behooves the Bengals to find a future starter in later rounds. If Bijan is actually there at pick 29 there will be some interesting discussions, but later round names like Zach Charbonnet, Devon Achane or any other running back prospect slated for Day 2 or later will be in the mix.
• Possible coaching departures and promotions:
  • OC Brian Callahan (finalist for the Colts job–lost out to Shane Steichen)
  • DC Lou Anarumo (finalist for the Cardinals job–lost out to Jonathan Gannon)
  • QB Coach Dan Pitcher (interviewed for Bucs OC)
  • After a lengthy process, Callahan, Anarumo and Pitcher all were passed over by other teams, leading them back to Cincinnati. The dream scenario would be for these coaches, who have been with the team for five years now, to guide the Bengals to the promised land and then find their places as head coaches. Of course, dreams don’t always come true, but there’s no harm in hoping.

6. Concluding Remarks
This was an amazing season for the Bengals, despite major disappointment on either end of the schedule. The biggest takeaway was the statement that the Bengals are real; all those projections of a “step back” or the team being a fluke have faded into the past. The convincing win in Buffalo was among the strongest statements the franchise has ever made. The new reality of the NFL is that the Cincinnati Bengals are a serious contender until proven otherwise.
The team has taken free agency losses and will need to see how the roster looks going forward, but this team is still largely the same squad that has reached consecutive AFC title games, and it’s mostly behind a coaching staff and quarterback that are still leading the charge. As long as Joe Burrow is wearing stripes, Bengals fans will enter the season (and often the postseason) with an aura of confidence that has frankly never existed for this fanbase.
Cincinnati will enter 2023 as one of the 4 or 5 shortest odds to win Super Bowl LVIII, and at this point, we fans can dream of our first Lombardi Trophy without being accused of hitting the pipe. However, many monsters loom in the loaded AFC. Guide us, the good shepherd Burrow.
Special thanks to u/TheReaver88 for his edits and summary work, and finally......
WHO DEY!

I'm not sure what information is needed and what is TMI. My bf (23M) and I (23F) got together back in Sept 2020. His bm (22F) and him were coparenting when we met and continued to do so up Until Dec 2021. At first she would only ask him to care for their daughter (3yo @ the time), whenever it was convenient for her. Which we didn't mind the extra time. Keep in mind she was always in Phoenix with her bf (whom she planned on moving in with etc.) and there were no scheduled times between them. Nor any agreed upon pickup dates. When he would ask, she wouldn't want to discuss it and would promptly avoid doing so until my bf told her I was pregnant. Then next thing we knew, she was planning on moving to phoenix and just told my bf that he wouldn't see his daughter for awhile. And he asked her what she meant and she just said she was joking. Then she messaged during the whole month and a half we had her talking about giving temp custody of her to her mother (my step daughters maternal grandma). Said that they would still coparent but her mom would be able to keep her from time to time when she wasnt able to come back down. If we didn't want that, she said she would sign over temp custody of their daughter to him along with any food benefits she received. We didn't go for it as we were already concerned that if we did get temp custody, she would abuse it and not help financially. She ended up coming back down and getting her for a few days and bringing her back. There were times she would keep their daughter to herself and times she would ask him to get her asap and not give us any reasons. She started talking to me in April 2021. I would give her updates on her daughter and whenever I wanted to know about what my step daughter was doing she hardly responded. I had also talked to her about how to discipline her because my bf and I didn't know how to go about it. She told us to lightly spank her which is what we started to do but I believe my step daughter had gotten used to her dad not disciplining her at all. We had no idea when she had broke up with her ex but she ended up with a new guy whose nickname was Beasle. They got together the end of May 2021. Then got a new car together beginning of June 2021. Which makes me assume they must've been together longer than that and decided to go public at the end of May. (This information is important ; trust me) The first time my bf met this guy was when his bm came to pick up their daughter ( by this time we were switching her off every 2½ weeks; we convinced her to start a schedule before our baby arrived) and I distinctly remember that my bf came back inside from taking his daughter out and he told me " I met so and so's bf. He's kind of suspicious." I said "why.?" He said "because he wouldn't give me eye contact at all." Which I thought was super weird. But I didn't comment on it much. Then the next time his bm came to pick up their daughter after our 2½ weeks, she said her bf was scared of my bf. Which i also found suspicious. I still didn't comment on it though. Then we had seen she changed all her socials back to single around Aug 2021 and wondered why but didn't question much as we are only concerned for my step daughter. Then in October 2021, we had seen a screenshot of her fb story (that she hid from me and my bf) about her ex, Beasle, and how he was in jail and his sister threatened her. She included things about how he held her against her own will, that his family didn't help her and they watched, even called him a killer, said he threatened her life, her family's lives and to take his own life to keep her. She said she's only posting a portion of what he's put her through. I admit I used a fake account to reply to her story about this and she told this fake account that he has even shot a gun near her to keep her around. That she has tried to call the cops multiple times and he always ran off and would come back and threaten her life again. She admitted he was in prison and for a huge reason. I was concerned hearing this from her and she never talked to me or my bf about this. We both didn't bring it up because we were both afraid to do so without having her take his daughter away. I think because she knew my bf would be upset that she put his daughters life at risk this way. Finally, we were doing fine till I noticed inappropriate behavior and talked to her mom about it. I explained how we have everything in my home kid friendly because of my younger siblings and niece. She seemed to echo what I said back to me but in her own words about how everything is at her house. It's weird because if she noticed this type of behavior on her end, why not bring it up? I thought that was strange but my bf didn't want to question anything because he was afraid to stand up to his bm for this reason. That she would keep their daughter from him. Then, in December 2021, after we had our 2½ weeks with his daughter, her mom picked her up and stopped talking to us 2 days later. We didn't know what to do or who to call. When the time came for our 2½ weeks, my bf tried to call the grandmother (because that was his bm main residence) to discuss if they were going to drop her off or if we had to pick her up. The grandmother texted him back that she's under medical investigation and that he's not allowed to contact her or his bm. We were genuinely confused because these past weeks with her were fine except for the fact that we did have to discipline her a few times for being mean to other kids. She was always a little naughty when getting her back from her mom. We always just did what her mother recommended last. We always tried time out or just talking to her first. We were worried and started calling around. First we called CPS and asked if there was a case open with my step daughters mother. They said yes and my bf tried to ask about visitation for his daughter as we were afraid she was taken away and might've been hurt badly at her grandmother's house where her and her mom were staying. We found out that was not the case at all when the social worker told us that there were serious allegations on the father. We tried to ask what they were but she told us she couldn't tell us anything and that visitation was up to the mother. She redirected us to the police department and said to ask for Officer L. We had done so but he wasn't there or was out on the field. We kept calling day after day and when we finally got ahold of him, he said he did make a report through the hospital with his bm but wasn't allowed to discuss the details because it's between him and my bf bm. He then redirected us to a criminal Investigator who was looking into the case. We called and they met up at an FBI office and they interrogated my bf about child abuse and child SA. They told him that the family was scared of him and asked him why that is. They asked him for DNA and lie detector test which he agreed to but they never got either of them the day he was there. He came out an hour and a half later and was upset that he didn't find out anymore information and was upset about the 'possible charges'. Before all this also, an officer stopped by the home but pronounced his name wrong so my bf never got served paperwork. We called and asked about that but nothing. They said they'd bring it by the next day and never did. We tried calling and stopping by the police department only for them to send us to dispatch then for dispatch to send us back to ask what officer had his papers and to find out when they're working to get the papers from them. We then decided to talk to a lawyer but the said lawyer wasn't with a law firm and kind of gave us a hard time including myself when I tried to help my bf remember dates when talking to him. We are lost and tried to call around about all of this but still are in the dark. We also recently found out that his bm ex (Beasle) who was in jail had groomed 2 teenagers who were in hs in his early 20s. So we have reason to believe that maybe he had done something to my step daughter. Although we know we are in no position to point fingers, we want to know how to go about this and if there's anything we can do. We are so lost and I just want my son and his sister to know each other. The last time she seen him, he was 3months old. Now he's 18months old. Not to mention the fact that we found out his bm got with someone new back in February 2022 and had a child for this new guy sometime in December 2022 or January 2023.
Sorry it's a lot and for those of you who take the time to read, it's very much appreciated.

I wanted to share my whole DUI experience in case it can help some of you just going through this. It is very long, so I split it up into parts to make it more digestible, and so you can skip a part of you aren’t interested in reading it. TLDR; at the bottom.
Some key info: I’m a female and was arrested at 28 with my first DUI charge and received it while living in Texas at the beginning of 2022. BAC came in at .21 and I had crashed my car into the curb when the cops found me. I hired my own attorney and the whole ordeal took 10 months.
Part 1: The Night I got Arrested
I went to a bar I had never been to by myself. I was recovering from COVID that I had tested positive for 10 days earlier. I had tested positive on my birthday and was feeling very bored and lonely and thought it would be a great idea to go out by myself and maybe make some friends or meet someone. Pro-tip for any of you new to San Antonio, the bars on the strip over-pour. I was not aware of this at the time and that was my second mistake. My first was going out without any friend.
Long story short, I left around close but I was so drunk that I blacked out. Usually when I drink heavily, I’ll sleep it off in my car before I leave, but I was so far gone, I didn’t sleep first. I don’t remember getting into my car or crashing it. The first time I came to consciousness, I realized my car was acting weird and pulling me to the left so I got out to look at it. The next thing I remember was having a cop standing next to me and the flashing lights behind my car. I tapped my damaged side skirt with my foot, looked at the cop, and said, “I dunno what happened.” I know, I should have claimed someone I had just met was driving because they said they were okay to drive, then crashed and ran off, but I was too drunk to think that clearly.
Next thing I remember, I’m being put in a holding cell. I didn’t come back to full awareness until I had woken up in the cell. I’m a little bitch, so needless to say, I spent the rest of the night sobbing. I learned that I had denied the breathalyzer and was taken to the nurses room to get my blood drawn. I tried to deny that one too but they had a warrant. Considering this was about 4 hours after I had left the bar and taking into account my sex and body weight, I was probably at around a .28 when I left. Around 9am I was taken to the magistrates office.
​
Part 2: Magistrates
I was taken to the processing room and asked by a male officer, “what do you have down there?”. Very professional way of asking if I'm a man or a woman... I look like a girl, but whatever. They set me up with a female officer and she had me strip naked, bend over and cough. One of the more humiliating times of my life. Pro-tip, if you plan on getting a DWI, make sure to bring a sweatshirt or jacket because it is absolutely freezing in both the police station and magistrates office. Also, maybe wear some sweatbands to shove under the ankle cuffs. I had a lot of bruises around my ankles when I left.
To save you all of the boring details of how the next 14 hours went, just skip to part 3 from here. Between waiting, watching whatever was playing on the TV’s, and trying to sleep in between fits of crying, I went through the whole processing process. First up was the judge where I was read my charges and given my bond. The bond amount came out to $1000, and thankfully I was eligible for a PR bond. I was bonded out with a $70 fee, but that didn’t mean I could leave like I was hoping.
Next up was getting processed. Finger prints, mugshot, the works. Then I had to sit down and go over my details with the bonds office so I could be accepted for the PR bond. After that was a trip to the nurses station where I had to take a pee test to check if I was pregnant (fun fact, I’m only attracted to women so... no), asked some medical history questions, and tested for TB. I was finger printed a second time for some reason and then spent the next forever hours waiting to be released. People with severe ADHD are not built for being locked up. I thought I was going to go insane.
Around 11pm they called my name for release where I was given my inmate card and told me this would be used as my ID since I wasn’t getting my license back. Then I was brought into the exit room and received my things from the desk. Wallet, keys, shoe laces, and phone. My phone was dead and no one had a charger, and with my car being impounded, I had no way to get home. Thankfully I made friends with another lady that had been locked up and her family was picking her up. She offered to get me a ride home.
​
Part 3: Impounded Vehicle, Damage, and Hiring a Lawyer
The next morning, I called a lawyer one of my friends used for her DWI and set an appointment for that afternoon, then took an Uber straight to the impound lot. I got to my car and saw the full extent of the damage in the light. It was bad. I clearly got into a fight with a curb and somehow got damage on the top of my fender. I never got charged for hitting anyone, so who knows what happened there. Maybe a concrete barrier, considering how much the top of my fender was ripped up. My rocker panel was completely crushed in, stress cracks on my front bumper, front lip was hanging off a bit, both wheels were cracked and tires were flat, and my side skirt had been mostly ripped off. I called a tow truck and he dropped me off at a little family owned shop and they took the wheels off to find the tie rod was snapped, and the front lower control arm and rear control arm were bent.
Suspension repairs came out to $700. I ordered a new set of wheels and tires later that week and left my car sitting in front of the shop while I waited for the wheels to get delivered. It took an entire month to get my car back in a driveable condition because of how long it took to get the wheels. I didn’t have the money to fix the body and didn’t want to file it with my insurance due to the situation, so over a year later I’m still driving a busted up car, but at least it works. Total cost for the parts, labor, getting it out of impound and tow came out to around $2600. I had a friend’s ex look at the body damage and he told me to expect around $3400 in body repair. Pro-tip, don’t get a DWI, they’re expensive.
One more pro-tip, as soon as you get out of jail, go online and get your license replaced. It takes a couple months for your license suspension to go through, so make sure you get a replacement license in the mean time. The cops will not give you your license back. As for the lawyer, he was cheaper than the car and was a huge help. $2700 and he dealt with everything. My advice when it comes to lawyers is get one. Many will offer payment plans so you don’t have to provide cash up front. He made the whole ordeal so much easier and gave me a lot of helpful info, plus knew the prosecutors and had friends among them. I’ll get more into why you need to get a private attorney in later parts. Hiring him was simple. I went to their website and set up an appointment time. Went to his office the day after being arrested, and told him the story. He told me what to expect, let me know what he can do, and we set up the payment plan. The deductible was $200 and he set me up to pay $150 biweekly until the $2700 was paid off. I had trouble paying him back and he said no worries, just get him back by the end of the year.
​
Part 4: Court, License Suspension, and Legal Advice
If you just got out of jail, be prepared for many months and many court appearances. Thankfully, a lot of court in Bexar County has been moved to Zoom since COVID hit and that is still the case today. My roommate is going through it right now, but for a different crime and with a free public defender, so I will be making comparisons in Part 8.
The first court date is just you stating that you are there and willing to follow the orders of your bond, stay in the state, and all that fun stuff. They ask if you’re present and you say you are, then your attorney will introduce him or herself. The next couple court dates are a blur, just mundane conversations with the lawyer and judge. Thanks to having an attorney, I didn’t have to attend 2 of the dates and he took care of the license suspension court. I was suspended for 6 months and could request approval to drive to and from work with a Restricted Drivers License, but I didn’t want to pay for the SR22 insurance. I only drove to and from work over the next 6 months, mounted my front license plate instead of leaving it in my window, and always drove as carefully as possible. Happy to say I made it without any issues. If you do get caught, that could mean additional fees or even being arrested again if the cop is having a bad day.
During this time, my attorney gave me a list of things to do that would look good to the judge. Based on his conversations with the prosecutors, without doing those things I was looking at 18 months probation and 9 months with an interlock. These things included taking 2 different driving courses, getting my friends and family to write letters saying nice things about me, writing a letter saying nice things about myself, donating to the judge’s favorite charities, and I even went ahead and took a SASSI-4. That’s an exam you take that a therapist will review and screen you for substance use disorder and risk. My lawyer decided not to show that one to the prosecutors when my result for “Alcohol and other Drug Problem” was “High probability of substance use disorder”.
I completed everything he gave me and the prosecutors offered a plea deal for 15 months of deferred adjudication probation (which allows me to have my record wiped 2 years after completing probation) and 7.5 months with an interlock. If you live in Texas and are convicted of a DWI for the first time, you are required a minimum 12 months of probation and have to have an interlock installed for at least half of your probationary period. They say a mandatory three days incarcerated too, but this is not true. The likelihood of going to jail for your first DWI once convicted is extremely low. I talk to one guy at the bar a year ago who volunteered 30 days in jail instead of taking a plea deal. That didn’t seem like an option for me, but I wouldn’t have taken it because fuck that. He said he wished he hadn’t.
​
Part 5: Conviction
I voluntarily decided to get sober in September and started attending AA meetings. I received my 1 month chip the day before my final court hearing and I think this helped my case a ton. My final court hearing had to be in person. My lawyer met with the prosecutors one last time and they settled on their original deal of 15 months probation and 7.5 months on interlock, but agreed to drop me from a Misdemeanor A to a Misdemeanor B because of my voluntary 1 month completion of sobriety with AA.
Once I was called to the stand, my lawyer stood with me and spoke to the judge about my case and the plea deal. She asked me a couple yes or no questions. Make sure you always say “your honor” when you finish speaking as a show of respect. The judge will take your respect of them into account. When all was said and done, and this is why I say having a lawyer is very helpful, I pleaded no contest and the judge sentenced me to 12 months of probation because in her words, “that’s as low as I can go”, which told me she would have gone lower if she could, 6 months on interlock, and agreed to dropping me to a misdemeanor B. I wanted to bear hug my lawyer after we left the court. Thanks to him and to my efforts based on his recommendations, and my personal decision to attend AA and get sober, I was dropped from 18 months of probation and 9 months on interlock to just 12 months of deferred adjudication probation and 6 months of an interlock. I am so thankful to the judge for having some mercy on me.
After court, I went to the probation office to get registered, and my first meeting was scheduled for a month later.
​
Part 6: Probation
Since I had completed all of those things my lawyer suggested I do (all except the donating to the judges charity because I was broke), I had the certification already completed for the mandatory classes. Also, and this one is weird and totally up to the judge, because I was vaccinated for COVID, she dropped 20 hours from my 45 hours of community service. I don’t know why, but I’m not complaining.
My first probation meeting went well. I seem to have a good PO. She did make me aware that I had to give 3 months notice for any planned travel outside of the state, but I travel for work frequently, and usually only get 3 days to 2 weeks notice before I have to fly out, and I work outside of the country on occasion. I contacted my lawyer and he was able to get the judge to approve an Order for Travel, allowing me only 48 hours notice to my PO if I am traveling anywhere inside or outside of the country for work with a mandatory drug test within 24 hours of returning home. Once again, thank you lawyer. A free attorney would have taken months to get this approved, but it only took my attorney a week.
I’m nearly half way through my 12 months of probation, and so far I haven’t had any issues. Every drug test is clean, my certification was approved, she set me up to do my community service at the animal shelter, and that’s it! Almost… I did have to take an alcohol and drug evaluation and, like the SASSI, the counselor who evaluated me, said I have a high probability of a substance use disorder. Pro-tip, if you had a beer while on probation, even if it was just one, don’t admit that… She talked me up and was being super friendly, then asked when the last time I purchased alcohol was and my dumbass admitted to having a beer with some pizza earlier that month. Now, I have to complete a month long $500 outpatient substance abuse treatment program. I start that next week.
​
Part 7: Interlock
Per my plea deal, I have to have an interlock installed on my car for 6 months and had a month after my court date to get it installed. I shopped around and ultimately went with SmartStart because they had the closest location to me. That was the only reason. The reviews for every company are all equally bad. I’ve had it for almost 5 months, and I can genuinely say this is the worst part of the punishment. These thing drives me insane. I’m required to blow into it 3 times a day, even if I’m not going anywhere. I’ve had to have the technicians fix something with it twice now. The first time it locked me out even though I wasn’t in my car, the second time it kept disconnecting and I couldn’t start my car unless I fiddled with the wires.
I also had someone break into my car a couple months ago, and that dumbass stole the camera. They probably thought it was a security camera, but it is definitely not. The camera only turns on when you are blowing into the device, just to make sure you are the one blowing into it and not cheating the system by having someone else blow into it. You are responsible for any damages to the device, so that ended up costing me $300 dollars to replace plus an additional $90 for the install. That brings me to my next issue… You have to have the device calibrated once a month. Calibration means they download all of the data on the interlock device and send it to your PO. It will record any time you blew dirty, got a warning (this happens if you are close to .025 BAC), didn’t blow when it alerted you while driving, or got a lockout. And it costs $90 each time. I'm looking at 6 months of interlock costing around $1000.
This past month, I started having an issue with my battery and found that the car will completely lose power and I have to adjust the negative terminal to get power back. This wouldn’t be the worst thing ever, and it isn’t the fault of the interlock, but if I get into my car and it has power, and I blow, sometimes the car will lose power when I try to start it. This causes the interlock device to freak out when I get power back to my car, and it won’t allow me to start the engine even though it isn’t asking me to blow. I have to turn my car off, disconnect and reconnect the unit, then sit there for 10 minutes with the battery disconnected before I can reconnect it, blow into the interlock, and finally start my car. This thing is nothing but an expensive pain in my ass.
Just a little over a month left and I can say goodbye to this little piece of shit. Provided my PO doesn’t take a long time to get the request for removal and the judge doesn’t take a long time to respond. That’s my final issue. Even though there was the agreement made in court that I only had to have it for 6 months, I can’t just get it removed once I hit the 6 month mark. I have to get approval for it to be removed and this can take anywhere from a couple days to a couple months depending on how backed up the judge is. According to my PO, the judge is very backed up. It took one of my friends nearly 2 months to get approval to have hers removed. That whole time you still have to use it as normal and go in for monthly calibrations. Our court system is so convoluted.
​
Part 8: Private Attorney vs Public Defender
Whatever you do, do not use a public defender. If there is any possible way you can afford an attorney, do that. Even if you have to take out a loan, HIRE AN ATTORNEY. My roommate is using a public defender for the trouble she’s in, and it has been nothing but a pain in the ass. They are overworked and will only do the bare minimum for you. My attorney was so easy to contact, went out of his way to help, covered court dates for me, got a great deal with the prosecutors, and gave me tons of helpful advice. Plus he was able to help with the work order and have it approved in a week after I completed court.
My roommate’s attorney is nearly impossible to contact, and when she finally does get a hold of him, he has no idea who she is or what is going on with her case. He’s always asking her to remind him of what happened last, and asking his assistant questions too. He got the prosecutors to agree to consider dropping her case after her first court date and all they needed was her hospital records to review since she was arrested on domestic dispute charges for taking the fall for her abusive ex. She was also arrested on a warrant for missing her court date, which means she is currently on full house arrest. For the past 3 court dates, her attorney has forgotten to give the prosecutors her hospital records.
She also requested partial house arrest so she can return to work but the attorney is dragging his feet on that too. She has now been out of work for 5 months and can never get a straight answer from him when she asks if she can go to work yet. Her place of employment has rehired her twice now, but she keeps getting removed from their system because it is taking so long. It seems this second time was the last straw, because now they won’t contact her back, and she can only get approved for partial house arrest if she has employment and a schedule to prove. It feels like going in circles with this guy, and she’s extremely depressed and defeated, and I’m footing all of the bills because I’m nice and love her. But holy fuck I am BROKE.
Please, for the love of all that is good, hire a private attorney, otherwise you’re probably going to get a shit plea deal, the absolute minimum amount of help, and be stuck to navigate the court system on your own. I regret not hiring an attorney for her, because she would have had her charges dropped back in January if it wasn’t for this shitty public defender, could have gone back to work, and she would have made back what the lawyer cost a month later. Don’t put yourself through that if you don’t have to.
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Part 8: Conclusion/TLDR
Anyway, if you made it this far, congrats. If I was helpful in any way, I am glad I could share. This took me a solid 3 hours to write. If you didn’t make it through, here’s the TLDR or a summary for those of you who did read most, if not all of it;
I got in an accident with a curb after blacking out and was arrested for a DWI. I declined to blow, but was given a blood test about 4 hours later, resulting in a .21 BAC. My license was suspended for 6 months because I refused the breathalyzer, although I would still recommend refusing just in case. It’s easier for a lawyer to get a dismissal on a blood test, plus there's a chance you’ll sober up enough to be under the legal limit by the time they get the warrant for the blood test. Make sure to get a replacement license as soon as you get out of jail, because it’ll take a couple months before your license is suspended.
Push for a PR bond if this is your first time being arrested and you have a clean record. The county will pay your bond and you just have to pay a fee. My bond was $1000 and I had a $70 fee. Do not accept a public defender if you can avoid it. Hire a lawyer. If you want all the details of why, you can read that in Part 7. Thanks to my lawyer and his recommendations, my charge was dropped from a Misdemeanor A to a Misdemeanor B, went from 18 months of probation and 9 months on interlock to 12 months and 6 months, and got a work travel order permitted in a week.
He was also able to get me a plea deal for deferred adjudication probation, which means you don’t get officially charged until you complete probation, and can have your record expunged after 2 years of completion. That’s great, because having a DWI on your record can be extremely limiting. You can’t go to Canada for 10 years, can’t rent a car, might not be approved for TSA PreCheck, employers will see it on a background checks, landlords and universities can see it too, and your insurance goes up. Get that expunged as soon as you can.
And finally, I wanted to put all of the costs together, including my extra costs and possible costs for anyone curious of the total.
Car Stuff - $11 for license replacement, $400 to have removed from Impound and towed to a shop, $700 on suspension repairs, estimated $3400 for body work. Total = $4511
Court/Probation Fee's - $70 for PR Bond, $2500 in court/probation fees, $120 for DUI courses, $10 a service hour, so $250 total if I don't do community service, outpatient therapy is $500. Total = $3440
LawyeInsurance - $2700 in lawyer fees, $250 for Restricted Driver License, around $800 for SR22 insurance for 6 months Total = $3750
Interlock - $540 for 6 months of calibrations, $390 for stolen camera, $90 for removal. Total = $1,020
Expunging Record - $600
Total cost when all is said and done - $13,321
Needless to say, I should have taken a $30 Uber. But hey, I've learned a lot because of what I did and there is nothing I can do but make the best of it. You can do this too. This is just one shitty hurdle in life, but you can overcome and move past it with time and effort. Thanks for reading.